sometimes i make things that i'm proud of

2

I am so excited!!! This little book (well, 264 pages) has been about 9 months in the making, and it’s finally done. Good grief.

Basically, many of my friends at my undergrad university did Creative Writing with me, and for our final project we had to write a 6k word short story and 2k critical commentary - which, by the way, as someone who has done a Master’s since and written a 20k thesis, was just as hard as writing a standard dissertation. As a surprise to everyone, I sneakily got copies of everyone’s short stories by pretending I just wanted to read them and compare them to mine, and I made them all into an anthology, which I gave to everyone at graduation. It was a really fun project to work on, even though it took ages to proof read the entire thing and design the cover and cry over Word formatting. We called ourselves the Come Along Collective because ‘come along’ was kind of a catchphrase of ours and ‘collective’ sounded professional and artistic. Sue us, we had degrees in this shit.

In June last year, about 3 years after we graduated, we met up (a pretty big deal, seeing as one of us now lives in the US!) and decided to do another anthology. Without the immediate option of including our conveniently timed university dissertation equivalents, we agreed that it would be really fun if we all wrote a short story of between 4-15k words - this is actually why I wrote Here, the World Entire, which appears in this anthology in a slightly shorter form! Since I made that first anthology back in 2013 our friendship group has changed a little, and so one contributor to the first anthology isn’t in this one and we have a new contributor, but that’s OK; it kind of charts the progression of everyone’s experiences since university.

So, over the past 9 months or so, we all wrote a story each, and everyone put their all into their stories, despite being 23-25 now and not having the luxury of time that we used to have, and honestly, the stories are amazing. There’s not a single one in there that I wouldn’t read in a literary magazine. One person didn’t do Creative Writing and was really worried about their story not matching up to the others, but it absolutely does. I did a little cry when I read it because it was so good and the writer didn’t think it was (I think they are now aware that they are actually super talented and should definitely write more). That was one of the reasons I’m so happy to have this physical copy as proof that it’s done, and people who thought they couldn’t do it did do it, and they did it fabulously, because every single person wrote something phenomenal.

There was one person in the group who wasn’t able to write anything because they had a lot going on in their life, and so the rest of us prepared a SUPER SECRET SURPRISE, complete with a secret Facebook group chat (which was literally titled THE ONE THAT YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO KEEP SECRET) in which we collaborated and wrote a story for her instead so that she would still have a story in the anthology. One person wrote a section, then handed it to the next person, and so on. It turned out to be an absolutely hilarious story involving Emily Blunt as an evil sorceress, Jez and Mark from Peep Show as couriers, and our old landlord as an arch villain. It’s pretty rad, not going to lie. That person still gets their name on the cover because the story wouldn’t have been written without them; we basically tried our best to put that person’s personality into a narrative, and that’s why it’s so weird. They are weird, is what I’m saying.

This whole thing was a massive labour of love for all of us. I was literally proof reading it on lunch breaks, and taking graphic design assignments at work so that I could practice for when I made the cover (which I think looks snazzy, if endearingly off-kilter). Everyone was hugely supportive of one another, giving each other prompts and feedback whenever anyone got stuck, and it was such a fantastic experience to make it from start to finish. I’m so, so proud of the end product, and I’m excited to see what our next one will look like!

I have also prepared a super secret special surprise of my own for everyone within this anthology, which I won’t disclose here just in case any of them happen upon this post. It’s rad, though. I’m excited for everyone to see it.

This isn’t available for commercial purchase or anything like that, but it’s a personal project that’s been taking up a lot of my time lately (in a good way!) and it’ll be kind of sad not to have this to work towards. Still, onto the next thing!

anonymous asked:

Idk who really are you. There's no way i can know by just looking your blog but i fucking adore you,i know that things are being so hard for you but i'm actually really proud, that you are being so strong and mature, things changes, sometimes painfully, but does and i beg to you to be safe more that anything, there's some healthy ways to relax even for a short time sweetheart. We love you and support you, best gift is to know that you are truly okay, alright?

i really appreciate you for saying these to me

bc..I don’t know uh  

maybe the pressure makes me think too much things , many things need to be done in a little time

and i start to learn what are Nihilism and Existentialism :S it makes me feel better somehow

I know there still a lot of things that i need to do , there are some messages that i haven’t replied and i feel really guilty

but talking couldn’t solve anything , i want to punch me and yell at myself to do those things

um ! but !

I am really fine now !  waaaaay better than last week  

you make me feel warm , thank you

Go on Facebook to see people are getting married, having babies, and graduating with their PhD. Meanwhile, my greatest accomplishment this month is writing 2k words.

An art trade I did for @layrus

I wanted to try drawing Genos as a dragon. I used a basic dragon but changed a few things in it to suit Genos. I was tired by the end so I ended up making a very sloppy Saitama. I’ll go back and fix him sometime but for now my hand is tiiiiired.

The dragon I’m proud of. Saitama? No…not so much 😂😂 but eh. I can draw a freaking dragon!!!

anonymous asked:

I hope it's alright to ask this, I honestly don't know where else to go. Lately I've been have some pretty terrible thoughts and urges that I can't act on because /I'm supposed to be better/. I don't know how to make them stop. I've started antidepressants but I'm only a few days in. I am so so sorry if I shouldn't of sent this. I'm sorry.

no love, it’s perfectly alright. i understand how you’re feeling, but i have to tell you something. you’re not supposed to better. there is no supposed to. you want to get better, and you want to fight these terrible thoughts and terrible urges. and you know what? you are. you fight them every day, and for that, you’re already doing better than “supposed to be better”. you’re fighting.

further, you’re trying to get better. you’ve started antidepressants, and for that, i’m really proud of you. starting medication can always be scary, if not for stigma, for fear of what it’ll do, what it won’t do. antidepressants are however, simply balancing out the chemicals in your brain. a lot of people under stress or even just being themselves end up with an imbalance. it’s like waking up with a broken leg. you wouldn’t tell someone with a broken leg they were supposed to be up and walking by now, especially if the break is just as bad as the day it arrived, if not worse.

you can be proud of yourself, proud of fighting and proud of wanting to get better, because that’s the first step and really, the only motivation you need. no one can take away your want to get better. give your medication at least a week or two to kick in, and also keep track of if it makes you feel better or worse. sometimes the first meds aren’t the right ones, and that’s okay, you just need to keep trying new ones.

the world will go on with you in it, and things will change. the meds will kick in, the broken leg might be really bad some days, but it will be manageable a lot of days too. you’ll get to talk to people you love, your friends, do things you love. grow and learn. you’re doing so well, and i really am so proud of you.

anonymous asked:

i actually just reread hogwarts crammer today! one of the things I love about it is that it's so like, funny? but not in a way that people are making jokes, just some of the phrasing, and particularly like, draco's internal monologue, it just cracked me up. I'd like read some of the lines out loud just to hear what theyd sound like in a posh voice and sometimes I couldn't even finish the sentence without laughing honestly

my number once piece of laughter enrichment advice is to read draco’s parts aloud in a nasal made in chelsea posh garble, as i always intended 

As a kid I thought growing up just meant that everything got less fun and colorful and exciting​, but sometimes it’s about getting stronger and more secure and I really didn’t expect things to get better but they did

sometimes in the later hours of the night i think weird things and do stupid stuff and when i wake up i regret doing whatever the weird thing was

this is not one of those things

brattygoth-deactivated20170430  asked:

My boyfriend left for the army a week ago and I'm kind of struggling to deal with not having him around. Do you have a pep talk maybe, or idea of things I can do to pass the time (since he was my best friend and now I have no friends or things to do lol)? I love you!!!

Ugh.

Be proud that he’s out fighting for people. Take heart that loving him keeps him strong,
Don’t get discouraged

Sometimes it’s miserable and frustrating,
I can’t imagine, but it is never hopeless

Find a battered women’s shelter near by, bring nail polish and clothes and whatever makes you feel special
Hand out bottles of water to veterans
Take up cooking, go for a run,
write him. Write him the things you’d whisper him if he was next to you in line, and the things you’d laugh into his neck and sniffle into his chest
Write them down and thank him every day

Well, You don’t look like a crocodile.

The darkness isn’t wild like she’d expected. It does not crackle and spark. It does not make her want to destroy and kill and take, take, take.

No, her darkness is sleek, intelligent. It does not want to destroy, it wants to savour. It wants to watch faces twisted in agony and betrayal, it wants to hear their heartache in their soft cries at night. It wants to hurt, to punish them for hurting her.

It makes her heart as sharp as the edge of the dagger that owns her. So, no, she is not a crocodile.

She is a snake.

Written for ouatdrabbles for their Post-Episode Character Drabble Challenge

  • Cole: Dorian, you said I could ask you questions.
  • Dorian: It's true. (Sigh) I did say that.
  • Cole: Why are you so angry at your father? He wants to help and you know he does, but--
  • Dorian: I'm not certain I can explain it to you.
  • Cole: You love him, but you're angry. They mix together, boiling in the belly until it kneads into a knot.
  • Dorian: Sometimes... sometimes love isn't enough, Cole.
  • Cole: "Love isn't enough." Enough what? You didn't explain, Dorian.
  • Dorian: (Sigh) I was rather hoping I had.
  • Cole: His face in the stands, watching as I pass the test. So proud there's tears in his eyes. Anything to make him happy. Anything.
  • Cole: Why isn't that true anymore?
  • Dorian: Cole, this... is not the sort of discussion for walking around. Please drop it.
  • Cole: I'm hurting you, Dorian. Words winding, wanting, wounding. You said I could ask.
  • Dorian: I know I did. The things you ask are just... very personal.
  • Cole: But it hurts. I want to help, but it's all tangled with the love. I can't tug it loose without tearing it.
  • Cole: You hold him so tightly. You let it keep hurting, because you think hurting is who you are. Why would you do that?
  • Dorian: Can someone tell him to stop? Banish him back to the Fade or something!
  • Solas: (if in party) Cole wants to help you. Maybe you should let him.
  • Dorian: (sigh) Marvelous! Everyone's so helpful!
  • Solas: (if in party) You're an adult, Dorian. You want him to stop, tell him.
  • Cole: I'm sorry. I keep making it worse.
  • Dorian: No, I'm sorry. Of course you don't understand. Just... leave me with it for now.

anonymous asked:

Do you enjoy doing art? Lately everytime I try, I just feel so mad at myself for not being where I want to be and I thought it would only last a few weeks but it's been almost half a year since I've really.. been like "wow im gonna draw so much today and finish it and it'll be great!" its stress just to pick up the tablet pen.

i get p mad at myself  too, but honestly yougotta go easy on yourself sometimes. just relax. you dont always enjoy yourself but that’s life. you just gotta believe that evenutally some tiny little thing will go right ans you’ll be proud of how that panel went or how that little shadow happened or maybe you’ll make the right choice when it comes to that one color choice. you gotta celebrate how rad you are in that mpment even if you have been feeling bad for a whole entire two months

i just read that and it wasnt coherent imsorry. tiny tiny victories or yiu’ll lose your mind basically

anonymous asked:

How do you write so well? I feel like I've been in a block lately, and nothing I'm writing seems to be good. Even when I'm proud of something, I'll look at it the next day and hate it. How do you do it?

Never feel ashamed of your art, Anon. NEVER.

This is probably the most important thing any writer/artist/photographer- you name it- will ever learn. You will make things you won’t like sometimes. You’ll look back on it and say: why would I ever make that?

And that’s okay!!

See, Anon, I have a shit ton of fanfictions on this site. 244, in fact. Additionally, I have a handful on ff.net that aren’t on here. So, for simplicity’s sake, let’s bump that number up to 250.

That’s 250 pieces. Now, of the 250, what is the probability that all of those are wholesome, quality work?

I’ll estimate about 100 are poorly written. 50 may be cliche. 30 could just be spawned from a really shitty idea. Some are too wordy, others are confusing, others just aren’t interesting- and as time goes by, this list will grow and grow and grow. I may only have a handful of ones that I perceive as good right now.

But, notice that I never said I wasn’t proud of myself for writing them. Of course, I don’t like some of them, but I’m still proud of myself.

Anon, look back at some of your old work. Mark the improvements in style. Maybe you don’t like the story you wrote most recently, but take a look at how you did it! Maybe your choice of vocabulary has improved, maybe your attention to mood, maybe your introspection or action scenes or whatever. I guarantee you got better at something.

The best way to get past that block of yours is to not take your writing (or art in general) too seriously. Write what you enjoy and enjoy what you write. Post it. Share it with other people. Maybe tomorrow it won’t look as good as it did today. But then, you look at what’s bad about it and make something better.