sometimes i feel like ever since i started talking to julia

Fresh Start - Part 3

Pairing: Barry Allen x Reader

Featuring: Joe West and Julian Albert

Words: 2369

Warnings: none

Tags: @onceuponateenpanwolfian @moonlightbae14 @gothesimplethingsinlife @writingsofagirlintomanyfandoms

Request: none

Notes: thank you to everyone who’s reading this story! I’m so happy you like it so far!

Originally posted by dailygrantgustin

PART 1  /  PART 2  /  PART 4  /  PART 5  /  PART 6  /  PART 7  /  PART 8  /  PART 9


Of course that incident during your very first hours in Central City had consequences. You told Thea what happened that same night and, of course, she ended up telling Oliver in no time. As a result, your voicemail was full of messages of a really angry, worried and protective older brother who threatened with showing up in Central City and taking you back with him if you didn’t call him back in less than 12 hours.

Talking him out of that threat in the morning wasn’t easy at all but somehow you managed to calm him down after being with him on the phone for more than an hour. You really appreciated his concern but there were times when you just wanted to kick his ass. Especially when his overprotection caused you to be late for your first day at journalism school.

You were lucky your teacher was a nice mid-age woman. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have been allowed to walk in the class. The first subject was actually pretty interesting. They were going to teach how to write a proper article, what register you had to use and which one you couldn’t, which were the right words according to the topic. They were going to teach you how to write. What you didn’t expect was to have work to do by the time the class had finished.

“I want an article about the topic you chose concerning Central City. It can be about projects the Mayor is carrying out, shops opening, metahumans, crime…whatever you chose is ok. Just remember: adjust your register, your language and state your sources. You have a week. Thank you and I see you on Wednesday” she explained while she took her papers.

The rest of the classes were as interesting as the first one and you couldn’t wait to see what this degree had to offer but you were already loving it. Lucky for you, the only work you had to do so far was writing that article and you had a week. Your way back home, all you could think about was topics to write about and you couldn’t come up with any good one.

It took you a time to find a parking spot and when you did, you went straight to Jitters to have lunch since you still didn’t have time to buy groceries and didn’t feel like doing it. When you finally had your lunch and a table to sit, you took out your laptop and started doing some research on the city while you called Thea.

“Hey! How was your first day?”  She asked the moment she picked it up.

“Great! I already love it” you smiled with enthusiasm. “But I already have work to do and I honestly don’t know where to start” you said.

“What is it about? Maybe I can help” she suggested. Soon you told her what the class was about and what you had to do, hoping she could really help you out on this one.

“And I don’t know what I can talk about. When the teacher started talking about writing an article, I immediately thought about writing it about Oliver, you know? I can get an interview with the Mayor of Star City” you laughed. “But then she said it had to be about Central City” you sighed scrolling down the screen in search for some inspiration.

“I would do it about metahumans” she said right away. You frowned at the answer.

“I’m not really interested in them” you commented.

“But people is! It’s an article people would read. Normal people with super powers? C’mon!” She exclaimed.

“Well you have a point…” you said as you typed ‘metahumans’ and searched for it. “I would definitely have information” you added as you saw all the results.

“And I’m sure you can even go to the police and ask someone there. They must have an expert or something like that” she told you.

“I guess…” you whispered. “Actually yes, maybe I can do it about metas” you nodded to yourself. “Thanks Thea, you’re a love” you said.

“I know” she said. You rolled your eyes at the response. “I gotta go to work but I’ll text you later, ok?”

“Ok, bye Speedy” you said before hanging up. “Metahumans…” you mumbled looking through the articles that had been written about them. “The world is crazy” you added before closing your laptop.

You had your topic, you had a week and you were hungry. It could definitely wait.

When you finished your lunch you went straight to the supermarket. You couldn’t just waste money eating out so the sooner you had your food, the sooner you would stop wasting money. The rest of the day was spent at home, unpacking and putting everything in place while you made a list of the things you needed for the apartment. By the time you were done, you were completely exhausted so you made yourself some popcorn, connected your computer to the TV and turned on Netflix.

Next day at university, the classes were as interesting as the first one. Except History of Journalism. That was the most boring class you had ever attended to and the teacher didn’t help. All he did was turning off the lights, turn on the computer and play a PowerPoint while he started talking in a monotone tone that would make anyone fall asleep.

So, after 15 minutes trying to paying attention and not getting anywhere with that, you opened your internet browser and started doing some research of metahumans as you took notes of everything you saw that it looked interesting. You knew there had been many metahumans attacks here in Central City but you never thought there would be that much. In less than five minutes you had a whole list of fifteen metahumans with different powers. But one of them stood out: The Flash.

The scarlet speedster that had saved Central City was all around the papers. Obviously he was loved by the whole city and he had even worked with the Green Arrow sometimes. It was interesting but the articles didn’t give you much more information. You needed a source and you knew where to get one: CCPD. You searched through the department web and soon you came up with a name: Julia Albert, metahumans expert. He was your guy.

When you finished your classes you went straight to the police department. There had to be someone who could give you more information about these metas so, once again, you were standing in front of the desk. Fortunately, this time there was another man behind it. A nicer one than the last time.

“I’m a journalism student and I have to write an article for one of my classes” you started explaining after he asked you what you needed. “I’ve decided to write it about metahumans so I was wondering if I could talk to Julian Albert? Your expert” you smiled.

“First I would need to your student ID if that’s not a problem” the man smiled at you.

“Oh sure! Sorry” you chuckled looking for it in your bag. Soon you found it and showed to him before hanging it around your neck.

“Alright, Miss Queen” the officer said with a smile. “Albert’s lab is upstairs. Turn left and you will find it at the end of the corridor” he informed you.

“Thank you” you smiled at him before following his instructions.

You would love to say that you got there with no problems but the truth was that your orientation wasn’t good at all so you had to ask for indications once again. Finally, you found the door with a sign next to it that said “Forensic Lab”. You peeked in and saw a blond guy sat down in front of a table, focused on some papers, and another one next to the window, looking at some kind of tube. Before you could say anything, the blond one got up in a hurry.

“Caitlin texted me. She has the result. I’ll text you later” he said taking his coat. His British accent actually surprised you.

“Alright” the other guy said.

“Hi…” you said shyly as you walked into the laboratory.

Both of them looked at you at the same time, obviously not expecting anyone at the moment. You imagined the blond guy was Julian Albert, the expert, since you recognized the other one as Barry, the nice guy you met on your first day. It looked like he recognized you as well, since he smiled at you the moment he looked at you.

“Hi! What a surprise,” Barry said.

“Do you know her?” Julian asked confused.

“I met her the other day downstairs. What are you doing here? Is everything ok?” He asked walking over you.

“Yes, actually I came to talk to you…Julian?” You said looking at the British.

“That’s too bad because I have to go. Sorry. But I’m sure Barry will be able to help you” he said walking pass you before you had the chance to say anything.

When he was gone you just stood there like an idiot, a bit confused by how he had stormed off all of sudden. Did you smell or something? When you heard a chuckle in the room, you turned to look at Barry to see him laughing silently.

“Something funny?” You asked raising an eyebrow.

“No, sorry” he chuckled. “You just…look funny right now” he shrugged.

“Well, thank you” you said crossing your arms.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bother you” he apologized and put the tube on the table. “Can I help you?” He asked.

“I…don’t think so” you frowned. “I came here because I’m writing an article about metahumans for a class so I wanted to talk to the expert but he’s gone faster than The Flash” you told Barry.

“Believe me, The Flash is way faster than that” he smiled as he walked over you. “What are you studying?” He asked.

“Journalism. Just started” you smiled proudly.

“Really? A friend of mine is a journalist for the CCPN” he told you. “Central City Picture News” he added when he saw your confusion. “You’re not from here, are you?” He asked.

“I’m from Star City, actually. I’m still trying to get used to the place” you shrugged.

“I see” he nodded. “Well, Julian is busy right now and I think he will be gone for a while. But maybe I can help you” he shrugged.

“Do you know anything about metahumans?” You raised an eyebrow.

“You would be surprised” he chuckled.

The answer was somewhat odd but you decided to let it go. This guy was one of the few people that had been nice to you since your arrival so you didn’t want to bother him with stupid questions.

“Well…ok” you nodded. “So can I ask you some questions?” You said awkwardly since you still wasn’t too sure about how this interviewing thing worked.

“Barry!” A big man came into the room wearing a black coat with a white shirt underneath. “We have to go. Cisco called me. It’s important” he said.

“Eh…Joe, this is (Y/N)” he said stopping this Joe for talking, like he could say anything wrong.

“Sorry, I didn’t see you had company. I’m Joe West, detective” he smiled kindly as he shook your head.

“Nice to meet you” you smiled at him and looked at Barry. “Raincheck?” You asked.

“Absolutely” he said taking a piece of paper and writing something down. “Call me tonight and we can meet up, alright?” he said handing the paper over.

“Sure. Thank you” you smiled at him.

“No problem” he smiled back. “See you”

None of them gave you time to say anything else before they left. Well, it looked everyone in this place was in a hurry except you. With a sigh, you put the paper in your back pocket and you looked around but since you had nothing else to do there you decided to leave the place before someone saw you. You didn’t even know if you were supposed to be there unaccompanied.

You had to do a couple things for college and you were starving so you went straight to the apartment to get it done. The afternoon was over before you even realized but you managed to get everything done in time. Still, you had some laundry to do so you took your basket and went to the laundry room of the building. Before putting the jeans in the machine, you checked the pockets and it was there when you came across the piece of paper Barry gave you.

“Damn!” you exclaimed.

Quickly, you put your laundry in the machine and took out your phone. It was almost 1 a.m. but maybe you were lucky and Barry was still awake. First, you saved his number into your phone and then, hesitantly, you dialed it and waited, biting your lip as you felt some tickling in your stomach.

“Hello?” His voice said on the other side of the phone.

“Hi Barry. It’s me, (Y/N)” you said.

“Oh, hi! I was starting to think that you had found another metahuman expert to talk to” he said making you laugh a little.

“I would never do that to you” you smiled. “Sorry it took me so long, I’ve been busy” you sighed.

“No worries. I’ve been busy too so I guess you called just in time” he said.

“I’m glad then. So…when are you available?” You asked biting your lip. Why did you felt so nervous doing this?

“Are you free tomorrow? Maybe we can have some coffee around 10 in the morning?” He suggested. Luckily for you, you didn’t have your first class until noon the next day so 10 should be fine.

“Sure! That would be great” you agreed.

“Perfect. Do you know where Jitters is?” He asked.

“Of course” you smiled. “So…see you there at 10 then” you said.

“Sure. See you tomorrow. Goodnight” he replied.

“Goodnight Barry” you said and slowly hung up, ignoring all those sensations going up and down your body just by the sound of his voice. Definitely, you needed to calm down.

Well, here we are again folks. Time for me to once again talk about the people I love to no end. I hope you’re ready, because this is a long one. Also, yes, I’m using the same graphic as last time. Leave me alone.

All I have to say to all you lovely people this time around is that I love you all very much and am very appreciative of this community existing, because I’ve made some very amazing friends here and increased my love of hockey infinitely because of you wonderful people. I feel like I’ve grown and changed a lot in my own personal life due to being on hockey tumblr and the people that I’ve met here and interacted with, and it’s only been positive growth and change. I think that people talk a lot of shit about internet communities and how toxic they can be, and while sometimes that may be true, you folks always shock and surprise me with how wonderful, lovely and supportive you can all be. I appreciate it endlessly, and I hope it never changes. So thanks for 1,000 followers (that’s insane) and let’s get started!

#

@1stclassletdown 

A – F

@aaronekdad / @a-burakovsky / @actualalienbensmith / @adammcquaidschesthair / @adhdrichietozier / @aleccmartinez / @alexazeek / @always-next-year / @andre-baerakovsky / @andreburakovskyisgod / @andreburakvsky /  @andrei-vasilevskiy / @antoinecroissantwrenchroussel / @archiebradley / @artturi-lehky / @asinglegoldenknight / @atlantathrasher / @austohmatthews / @aust34n / @backstrcm / @badgalkadri / @baehutt10 / @bennjuice / @billnylander / @bisexualbastian / @bortuzzo / @brassard-derick / @bravdenschenn / @brendanlipstick / @brendansmittys / @buchneviched / @buckypuck / @bura-babe / @burracudaa / @calisavagebunny / @camtalbottt / @cannolimaatta / @cantevenskate / @capmorielly / @captainmitchmarner / @captainpoulin / @captkentparson / @carey-pric31ess / @cargojorts / @casual-toronto-trash / @charliekapanen / @charliesnackavoy / @coltonparakyo / @connor-mcdavo / @connormcdazzle / @connormcskellington / @connormxdavid / @connrbrowns / @coolmatthews / @countvanriemsdick / @crouses / @crown-city-or-die / @crxsschecked / @daddyseggy / @daisiesmakingchains / @damnwassup / @detroitundeadwings / @devinscore / @dougiehamiltons / @drai-29 / @draisaitl29 / @dt-brown / @dubnyk / @dvlanlarkin / @dylanlarkin / @eat-sleep-leafs / @edmontonkailers / @ekmanlarssons / @explore-a-little / @flowbros / @fornothingisevilinthebeginning / @fratboyhanifin / @freddieandersens / @fuckhockeybutalsofuckhockey / @fuckin-hockey / @fuckleafs

G – L

@gallysburger / @gallysgrin / @generichawkeyblog / @getmewiththosegreeneyes / @gingerbrownie / @goldenknghts / @gorditx / @hakunimaatta / @handcraftedweedorange / @henrikzetterbergs / @hertls-smile / @hockey–eh / @hockeygrandpa / @hockeyinspires / @hockeyisallineed / @hockeyisreligion / @holtbaest / @hrtfrdwhlrs / @hunkdqvist / @h2ofireyrage / @icantbelievesomeone / @icechild-josi / @ice-ice-hockey / @icesonice / @imaginarydaze / @impekkablerinne / @itsyourboykent / @ivanprovolone / @jagr-trash / @jakegardiner / @jamesneal / @jaybeaglefans / @jimbovesey / @jimmyskjei / @jimmyveseysfreecoffee / @johnnyandmony / @joshhodang / @joyousramblings / @juicysaros / @justhockey / @karilehtonens / @kasperikapanenisbetterthanyou / @kassu-kapanen / @kaz-in-the-impala / @kdraj82 / @knightsduke / @koilers / @konecyourself / @korpisalos / @kuuuuuuuuuch / @kyamamoto / @larkintrash / @leafstrashtm / @leafystephens / @letangandlefleury / @lifeasaeuropeanhockeyfan / @lindholmz / @lottswrites / @lovve-beyond-words / @lowkeyhawkey /

M – R

@maattdaddy / @man-tha / @maplelaughs / @mapleleafstrash / @mapleloafs / @maple-loafs / @maplesleaf / @marner-rielly / @marnershair / @marnsteejsegs / @marnsxmatts / @martinfrks / @mattsmartsmarns / @mattystrome / @mcdraii / @mcmarns / @minourouss / @mitchellmarnthews / @mitchmarnerssmile / @mitchy-marnrs / @mitchy-marns / @mitchymarnsy / @mmmlatta / @mo-gardiner / @moriellly / @moriellymolove / @motoleafs / @mrazzy / @mvpleleafs / @mvtchmarner / @mybbynylander / @mystupidlovesongs / @nazem-kadream / @nazemkadri / @nevmar / @nhl-canes / @nhloffseason / @niederreiter22 / @nkadri / @nohappinessleague / @nolan-hatrick / @nolanjamespatrick / @nolannpatrick / @noseriouslythisis / @notbuddies / @nugentthopkins / @n-ylander / @nylanderr / @nyland3r / @nymarnthews / @ohmygoshhockey / @ohmy-hockeyplayers / @ohmymarner / @oilersluv / @onhomeice / @ottermcdavid / @panic-at-the-goalline / @paraykhoe / @pastasmynood / @pavszacha / @penaltyboxprincess / @pernellkarl / @phatrickmaroon / @philadelphiaflyernolanpatrick / @phoenixcoyotes / @pillsburymcavoy / @pksuburban / @ptuukkadactyl / @puckfucker / @puckheads / @puckinghawkey / @pucking-willy / @puckstars / @puckslut34 / @quaider / @radicalradek / @rangers-of-newyork / @raskbrothas / @riellymo / @rightwingwilson / @rnarner / @ryan-macdount / @ryannugentpumpkins

S – Z

@saarijaervis / @saintpatrice / @savnasser / @sheary / @seanmcnahans / @sixteenthirtyfour / @skjeidy-bitch / @skjeiwhat / @sleepy-leafs / @smileyboymarner / @snarkylarky / @sodunwithhockeyfeels / @softauston / @softmarner / @spookylatta / @spookymarner / @starscapsleafs / @stepmom / @sunshinestromer / @sweetbbkuch / @takeitoff-leafs / @thealidoyle / @thegirlwhocriedsass / @theleafssuck / @theseleafsarealrightfam / @theoneandonlyzoe / @theseleafsarealright / @thirtyfours / @timomeier28 / @tomashrtls / @toothlessburns / @toronthoes / @torontomaplebros / @torontomaplegardens / @torontos / @travisdermott / @travlskonecny / @ttoronto2colorado / @turnshitoff / @tylersequin91 / @tysbarrie / @tyseguinbae / @tysonbarries / @unfriendlyspidey / @wannabepuckslut / @wennbergbabe / @werenskis / @werenzki / @whatcha-skjei / @whentheworldsleeps23 / @williamnylandersthighs / @willynylanders / @wllmnylndr / @wonthetrade / @yahadmeathockey / @yannigovrde / @yotes4life / @zaitsy / @zetterbeard

Extra lovin for my lovely friends under the cut!

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BTS Reaction to Their Best Friend Accidently Confessing to Them; Rap Monster Version

Originally posted by pjkook

“Joonie!” Y/N yelled, stomping out of her room with her arms folded across her chest. She marched her way into the living room and huffed when she saw her roommate, and best friend, with his headphones blaring and computer in his lap.

He was nestled into a little blanket cocoon on the living room couch, his head nodding along to whatever music he was composing. Namjoon hummed gently under his breath as he listened, clicking around on his computer occasionally to create the perfect music for his ears. Y/N noticed the empty drink cans and snack bags scattered about the coffee table and floor and she sighed, her eyes softening. She reached over and pulled the headphones off Namjoon, smacking him gently upside the head with a pile of papers he held in her hands.

“What did I tell you about playing your music so loud? You’re going to go deaf someday.” Y/N chastised as Namjoon rubbed the spot where she had hit him.

“And I thought we talked about your mental abuse issues as well?” he teased lightly, stretching his stiff limbs and running a hand through his messy hair.

“You’ve been out here for a long time.” Y/N commented as she moved around to clean up Namjoon’s mess.

“Eleven hours.” Namjoon said as if he were talking about the weather.

“And you’re not even close to done?”

“Nope.”

“You know that your demo deadline is in four days.” Y/N sat down next to Namjoon on the couch, crossing her legs underneath her. Namjoon groaned and ran a hand over his face.

“I know, I know, it’ll get done.” He sighed, propping his feet up on the coffee table.

He let his gaze slightly wander over his friend, noticing that she was wearing those tantalizing night shorts that kept him awake in the wee hours of the morning. Namjoon could feel his heart stir up, and the fact that Y/N was also wearing one of his shirts (his favorite black one that was way way too big on her and that slipped off her shoulders) wasn’t helping the situation in the slightest. Namjoon noticed the stack of papers Y/N held in her hands and diverted his attention from his beating heart to those instead.

“Whatcha got there?” he asked, pointing at the papers with his eyes.

“Oh, this?” Y/N flipped through the papers absentmindedly, “It’s a partner scene we have to do in my intro to drama class. It’s actually what I wanted to talk to you about.” Namjoon looked at Y/N curiously, but stayed silent, urging her to continue with a nod of his head.

“My partner for this honestly doesn’t care about the class, I think he’s just taking it for the elective credit but you know how much acting means to me. Anyways, I want to do a good job in this, but without practicing with anyone it’s kind of hard to get into character. I was wondering if you could…you know…” her sentence trailed off and Namjoon’s eyes widened in realization of what she was asking him to do.

“Oh yeah! Totally Y/N, I’ll help you out. Who’s this guy? Do you need me to give him a talking to?” Namjoon asked. Y/N stared at him for a long second before doubling over in laughter, leaning against his shoulder. Namjoon was confused, and his face matched his feelings as he watched the girl laugh her heart out. Y/N wiped the tears from her eyes and rubbed Namjoon’s back.

“Joonie you’re such a dork sometimes. No, I was hoping that you’d be the one to practice with me instead. The grades are individual, so even if he does a crappy job it won’t affect me. Is that okay? I know you have your deadline so?” Namjoon let out a soft ‘oh’ in understanding.

“Sure Y/N, I guess that’s okay. I need to focus on something other than major and minor chords anyways.” He admitted, grabbing the stack of papers and shuffling through them.

“You still have to get your music done though! Only two or three run-throughs is all I need and I’ll be out of your hair for the rest of the night.” Y/N promised, taking and separating the stack of papers into two piles. She handed one to Namjoon, who gave her a smile in return.

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever mom,” Namjoon teased, “So, what kind of dialogue are we actually doing?”

“It’s a romantic comedy called ‘Quippage’; it’s kind of a satire about the awkwardness of first dates but has a romantic and happy end.” Y/N explained as she turned more to face Namjoon on the couch.

“I’m guessing you don’t want me to play ‘Julia’ right?” Namjoon chuckled and Y/N slapped his shoulder.

“There you go with your mental abuse again, how do you expect me to help when you keep beating me up?” Namjoon laughed and covered his face as Y/N continued her onslaught of playful slaps.

“Kim Namjoon, you’re supposed to be helping me, not teasing me!” Y/N said, although deep in her heart she knew that Namjoon’s constant teasing was one of the things that she loved about him.

The two friends proceeded to act out the short, fifteen-page play. The two quickly embraced the awkwardness of their characters and they honestly forgot that they were acting as they read off line by line. The laughter was real, and the actions they added in only made the play better as they ranted to each other as the characters they portrayed.

“Oh,” Namjoon said with panic in his voice as his character became embarrassed, “I don’t have a backup question.”

“Well I have one.” Y/N said.

“Oh?”

“Why did you ask me out?” Y/N said quickly, and Namjoon blanked as he acted confused.

“What?”

“Why did you ask me out?” Y/N asked again, putting more emphasis on the ‘you’. Namjoon sighed.

“Is this supposed to be a trick question?” Namjoon asked and Y/N looked at him with a puzzled stare.

“No?”

“You’re not recording this are you? No one is gonna jump out from behind the trash cans Punk’d style, right?” Namjoon asked, his voice turning soft and Y/N felt a rush of sympathy towards him.

“What are you talking about?” Y/N asked and Namjoon took a deep breath.

“Well, the truth is,” Namjoon paused, looking around like a spy undercover before leaning in close to Y/N’s face. She felt her breath hitch in her throat as she stared deep into his eyes. “I asked you out because I like you. You’re funny in class, and I wanted to get to know you better and see what else the funny and cute girl in math was made up of.” Namjoon smiled softly and allowed his eyes to wander over Y/N’s pink cheeks. She cleared her throat before speaking again.

“Now, why was that such a big deal?”

“What do you mean?” Namjoon asked as he backed away, and Y/N missed the warmth that radiated off his skin.

“You went into spy mode before saying why you asked me out? Is it such a big deal to keep it a secret?” Y/N’s voice was laced with hurt, and Namjoon’s eyes widened at her words.

“It’s not.” He assured.

“Then why-“

“Okay,” Namjoon cut her off, taking a deep breath before speaking again. “I’m just surprised. I’m surprised you said yes. I’ve been waiting for that friend of yours, the one with the shaved head and that yells at anyone who tries to eat her hotdogs-“

“Sheila?”

“Yeah, Sheila. I’ve been waiting for her to jump out, pull my underwear up and over my head as the two of you cackle and walk away saying ‘Loser, loser.” He explained.

“We don’t cackle!” Y/N said, offended by Namjoon’s words.

“So…why did you say yes?”

“And atomic weggies aren’t our style anyways.”

“You’re avoiding the question.” Namjoon pouted, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Ordinary weggies maybe.”

“Julia!” Y/N sighed and looked up at Namjoon’s angry expression.

“Why do you think I said yes. I like you too, you dork.” Y/N smiled, speaking sincerely.

“Really?” Namjoon asked. Y/N nodded.

“Ever since we moved in together. I’ve liked you and always found you attractive. You’re a big dork, but you’re smart, passionate, and driven and I love that about you. You make me happy, and I’ve wanted to tell you that for a long time.” Y/N confessed, looking down at her lap. She realized her mistake of breaking character much too late, and spoke from the heart instead.

“Y/N,” Namjoon’s voice was soft as he gently nudged his finger underneath her chin, tilting her face up towards his own. He could see her eyes turn red and tears start to form in her eyes at her embarrassment. Namjoon cupped her cheeks, using his thumbs to wipe away the stray tears as he leaned down to place a kiss against her lips.

His kiss was soft, tender as he held Y/N close in his embrace. He stroked her cheeks gently and brushed his lips against her immobile ones. He felt her arms climb onto his shoulders as her lips tentatively kissed him back. Namjoon kept the kiss innocent and light; though their lips barely touched anyone could see and feel the warmth, comfort, and hidden promises laced between velvet breaths and brushing hands. Namjoon broke the kiss first, and laughed airily when Y/N tried to chase his lips back to her own.

“That wasn’t a part of the script, Y/N.” Namjoon teased, leaning up to pepper her nose and cheeks in soft kisses.

“Neither was that kiss.” She quipped back, giggling at Namjoon’s affection.

“Need I say that I like you too?”

“No, but I still need to practice and you still have a deadline.” Y/N reminded, although her words lacked their usual malice as Namjoon’s lips slowly worked their way down Y/N’s neck.

“I’ve waited too long for this moment, please, let me relish in it for a while.” Namjoon gave Y/N a look and her heart melted at the sight, sighing as she allowed his lips more access.

“Five minutes Joonie, then we get back to work.”

  • Okay now for the set, lighting, and acting things I will never be over in Bandstand
  • the lighting is Incredible
  • even though for the entire first act, the set is actually the exact same thing with the instruments moved, you forget it. when it’s the clubs, it’s the clubs. when it’s Donny’s house, it’s Donny’s house. When it Julia’s house, that’s what it is. you don’t even notice anything else
  • during the first scene, where Michael dies, the lights are blue and sharp, only on the actors, and whenever Donny has a flashback, that’s what they go to. sometimes for a long time, like the whole beginning of Right This Way, and sometimes short, like a literal flash during the scene before that
  • the flashbacks also always having booming drums, usually The Drumbeat, which is DUN dun dundundun DUN dundun dundun, but in the super short one it was just one really loud BOOM
  • the sound design was soo cool! it was really loud when the band was performing, and they were super good at setting the volume to match the scene, and I can’t articulate what I mean but trust me it was so cool
  • every man in the band has some sort of tell when their PTSD is bad. Donny waves his fingers and his whole body tenses, Nick clenches his fists and gets angry, Davey takes a big drink and his jokes get worse, they all deal in their own ways
  • but again, when they’re performing, it seems to go away
  • the whole thing is incredibly authentic. the dialogue flows completely naturally, and the chemistry of the cast is so good the emotions flow right along with it. when Donny is scared or angry, the audience is scared or angry. it was amazing
  • THE SET CHANGE
  • OKAY so for the whole first act and the beginning of the second, it was the simple club buildings and stage
  • in A Band in New York City, the set splits in half and goes offstage, and a platform come out with chairs on it to mimic a train, and luggage boys are “pulling” the train with a luggage train. also an almost abstract neon train hangs down behind them
  • then when they get to New York, the platform goes away and the neon light train goes away, and down drops a neon light building, tilted crooked. it looked like one thing. and then when they left the hotel it split and there was suddenly a street of neon buildings. and then a crooked neon cityscape
  • I swear to god that set change changed my life I can’t even describe it to you, my soul left my body and ascended from the earthly plane it was so good
  • what was really cool about it was that the simplicity of the first set didn’t go away at all. it was simple line art done in neon lights, there was still no walls or anything, it just was brighter and the city. it was so cool. augh. so amazing.
  • The Acting my GOD
  • Corey Fucking Cott my dudes Corey Cott is INCREDIBLE
  • the entire cast acts very well together, and also very well apart. they make everything flow super naturally, and are just amazing and perfect.
  • the Raw Emotion of the show is just amazing. there’s no “oh I’m sad but I’ll get over it” or “oh I’m in love with you” it all feels real and makes you feel it too
  • especially Julia. Laura Osnes manages to keep Julia a completely normal person. She gets mad and sad, but even while working through her husband’s death, she has moments of happiness. she can laugh and cry in the same scene, she can be perfectly fine one minute and not the next, Julia Trojan is just a very real person.
  • Corey Cott played Donny so well I couldn’t even comprehend it. His panic attacks were amazing acting, he collapsed in on himself and breathed like it was hard and was clearly having a physical problem, and when he told Julia how Michael really died he was sobbing. as in, had to pause his lines and collect himself, sobbing. audibly and visibly just crying. I’m sure part of it was genuinely Corey, since the show closes tomorrow and that has to be emotional, but it was acting and it was amazing
  • they all play off of each other easily, and every single person has amazing timing when it comes to lines and jokes. every joke landed, and every heartbreaker also landed.
  • i think that’s part of what makes the show so incredible. all of it feels real. every interacting makes sense, no conversation is just filler to get where you need to go, it all really felt like friends being friends, and because of that, the emotions changed realistically. 
  • Donny snapped several times, the biggest ones were with the club owner, the one with Nick, and when he yelled at Julia before explaining how Michael died, and every one you could see the pressure building before he couldn’t help it
  • the PTSD was really well shown, everyone dealt with it differently, and there were no jokes about it at all. it was very much presented as, this is what they have to live with, and people are ignoring it, and that’s a problem. nothing is “just like it was before” and nothing ever will be. maybe they didn’t die, but they went through hell, and ignoring it isn’t gonna get them anywhere, but they don’t know how to deal with it. So Donny throws himself into his music, Wayne schedules everything, Johnny is grateful for everything that happened to him because at least he doesn’t have to remember.
  • it was a heartbreaking show, I didn’t count how many times I cried but it was a lot.
  • Welcome Home, the last one, was so incredible.
  • the whole scene leading up to it was intense, because they started out so excited and then Jimmy comes back with the news that the wording of the contract gives away the band’s rights to the song, and then they’re angry, and then Donny decides to sing Welcome Home and they all get nervous
  • also, um, when Johnny said “You’re talking about a suicide mission” people laughed. as if he had made a joke. when it wasn’t a joke. this band had literally placed their sanity on top of the hope of winning. “during those few short hours a day/the noise in my head goes away” and Singing Welcome home could have gotten them blacklisted, meaning they never would have been able to perform again. “Suicide mission” wasn’t a joke, they literally may not have survived not having the band. 
  • anyway that was my interpretation of it, i didn’t laugh I cried. again.
  • so then they all agree to it, and they go onstage, and it’s announced that they’re going to sing Love Will Come and Find Me Again, and Donny tells Johnny to set the tempo
  • earlier he told the story about Michael and getting the tempo super fast, and the other version of Welcome Home they sang was slow, so Johnny started out slow, but Donny said “faster. faster. faster.” until it was really fast, and then said “now sing!” just like Michael did, and I cried some more
  • and then Laura’s performance. Ho. Ly. Shit. I know I’ve said “Raw Emotion” like ten times but this was probably the most emotional song I’ve ever seen done. She started singing “Johnny made it home. Most of him at least.” and Johnny’s emotions kicked in. every time she said a name, I cried harder and the band played harder. then everything but piano cut out for “Donny does his best, trying to pretend” and Corey bowed his head and you could tell the entire band was just overwhelmed by what they were doing and why, and they all knew they were ruining their chances of winning but they also all knew they were giving hopeless people hope, and the last chorus I’m pretty sure every single member of the Donny Nova Band was crying and I sure was
  • the entire cast was phenomenal. every single one of them. the band members played their instruments so well, and all of them were incredible actors, and even though not all of them had the Perfect Broadway Voices of Corey and Laura, they all sang like they meant it and they all had great voices. the ensemble was super high energy and fun to watch, and I loved them.
  • the music is obviously amazing. there isn’t a single song that doesn’t belong, and there isn’t a single song that wasn’t good to listen to, either fun or emotional or just plain good.
  • I’m in love with every single member of the Donny Nova Band
  • the constant theme of having each other’s backs was so good, and the shirt I got says “The Donny Nova Band” on the front and the band’s tour locations on the back, and says “Got your six” on the sleeve, and it’s amazing
  • anyway I need to sleep but um you’ll be hearing more about this work of art show soon because it was so freaking amazing
The One That... Wait, What?

Joey Tribbiani x Reader

Words: 1849

Summary: After dating for nearly five months, Joey believes that he and Y/N may have something really serious. To his own surprise (and the surprise of his friends) he actually feels ready to take the next step in their relationship with her. That is until she breaks up with him one night at the cafe. Miserable and heartbroken, he confronts her the next day to discover the unbelievable.

Note: Again, I’m kind of on a 90s high so just stay with me. Anyway, I cannot believe I didn’t start this show sooner, but I am so glad that I did. So this takes place around the first season (not gonna lie, I just loved Joey’s hair that season), but there isn’t really any plots of the show in the story. P.S. If you guys want to see a sequel, I’d be down for one.



The sun was shining brightly as the snowflakes collected in Joey’s hair, creating little white specks in the sea of black. You ran your fingers through, pushing strands gently away from his face. Despite being on the roof in the middle of winter, neither of you were cold. A warm hand drew circles on your arm.

“Hi.” He greeted sleepily. You grinned.

“Hi.” You shifted under the quilt. “We should probably go inside. We’ll catch a cold.” He pouted his lip.

“Five more minutes?” He placed a kiss on your collarbone.

“Joey,” You sighed playfully. “I have to get ready for  work.” His arms wrapped tightly around you, refusing to let go.

“Do you know what today is?” He mumbled into your hair. When you didn’t answer, he continued. “Today is our five month anniversary.”

“Wow.” You remarked in awe. “Five months…” You pressed your lips against his, letting out a breathy sigh. “I really need to go.” He pouted his lips and gave you the puppy dog face, his big brown eyes pleading you to stay. You groaned. “Don’t do that face…”

“It’s our five month anniversary, Y/N.” He whined. “Can’t you just call in sick?” You laughed.

“Honey, that’s not how that works.” You gave him another quick kiss before reaching for his sweatshirt and your jeans. “You know how much I need this job. I want to make partner someday.” You had just started working at a small law firm and you really wanted to impress your boss so you would hopefully be promoted one day.

“How did I land a smart, sexy, lawyer like you?” He grinned, sitting up and grabbing his clothes, looking for his sweatshirt until he realized you were wearing it. He narrowed his eyes playfully and pulled his shirt over his head.

“Because my friends dared me to go out with you.” You landed one last kiss before climbing off of the futon.

“Wait, seriously?” He asked with a laugh, wrapping his arm around your shoulder as the two of you started towards your apartment. Since you were on the top floor, your landlord had let you take control of the roof since most of the inhabitants thought it was haunted. Sometimes, you thought Joey believed them. You nodded.

“It was right after I got dumped by this total jerk, and my friends and I decided to go out on the town.” You explained. “Well after a long night of getting over him, we went to this little cafe to help ease the hangovers. Since it was so packed, there were only so many seats left. I was out with three friends, and the only table had just three seats. So there I was, looking for a place to sit, when my friend points out this guy sitting alone at a table for two. And they dared me to go talk to him.” Joey narrowed his eyes in confusion.

“Where do I come in?” He asked and you couldn’t help but laugh.

“You were the guy, sweetie.” You smiled.

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You’re A Firework - Dylan O’Brien Imagine

Author: Dylanowhy (me)

Summary: Dylan O’Brien was your first kiss, your first love, that is until fame hit him like a truck. Now after years of not speaking and being apart, you decide to stay in his old room for a summer while figuring some things out. Coincidentally Dylan just so happens to be taking a break during that time.

Pairings: Dylan O’Brien x Reader

Warnings: Fluff. Kissing.

Word Count: 3,457

A/N: This is the first chapter of my new story Start Of Something New! I hope you guys enjoy.

Originally posted by dylanobriengirl

Soft hums of Katy Perry played in the background, the smell of BBQ filled the air. Kids ran around as the parents all stood in various places, talking about things that interested them and the teens sat on the stairs, watching all the madness while waiting on the food. You were holding some of Julia’s famous lemonade, her brother’s body slightly leaning against yours. “I bet you ten dollars Uncle Mike is going to light himself on fire tonight.” His voice was slowly turning into low and smooth as he was getting older, it had gotten to the point where your breath would hitch when he spoke to you. He was around two years older than you, but for some reason you two became friends, clicking together instantly. Him and his family had been quick to make you feel like part of the family, hence why you were at their family cookout for the 4th of July instead of being at home with yours. “Why wait until tonight? Two more steps closer to the grill and he will be in flames.” Your words made Dylan laugh, his head falling back as he did so. Julia glanced up at you two, smile on her face as she shook her head. Julia knew you had a crush on her brother, she had confronted you about it probably around a month ago.


“You’re looking at him different.” She had said, arms crossed upon her chest, eyes narrowing down at you. “I am looking at him like the goofball he is.” You said defensively, confused look on your face. You didn’t know exactly when you started developing feelings for Dylan, but it made you worry. If Julia could see it, could he? “Like a goofball you’re in love with.” She mumbled, but you still heard her, it took a lot out of you to wipe the concerned looked on you face as Dylan walked out of the dressing room, striking some ridiculous pose in his slacks. School pictures were coming up for the end of the year and you had agreed to go shopping with him. “I am feeling these.” He said, smoothing down his jeans, making a face that cause you to laugh, shaking your head at his childish acts. “You look like a grandpa.” You commented, his face scrunching up at the idea. “Do not.” For someone who was older than you he really did act like a child most of the time, the corners of his mouth pulling down in a frown.

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Gauntlet Talk (First to Fifth)

Seeing as it’s been half a year since the release of Heroes, I wanted to talk about my favorite part of the game: the Voting Gauntlet. Is the Voting Gauntlet incredibly flawed, yes, but I still vastly enjoy the competition, the usage of friend units, the three-on-three battles, and the ability to actually kind of connect to the community, and so I want to talk about it.

That being said, I want to focus more on my observations and analyses of the gauntlets and how the community has reacted concerning the gauntlet than on my opinion, hence why my title is really bad because I’m going to talk about a lot of things. Now let’s get started (feel free to correct me if I get anything wrong)!

  • March: Princes vs. Princesses (No Multiplier)
    • Winner: Lucina (13,393,577,270 / 3,312,677,530)
    • Final Contenders: Lucina and Ephraim
    • Participants: Alfonse, Chrom, Ephraim, Leo, Sharena. Lucina, Eirika, Elise
    • The first ever gauntlet, and the most well-known one. No one knew exactly what was in store for them, so this was the gauntlet where a lot of the tips and tricks for future gauntlets were developed (mainly that of join less popular teams to cash in on feathers). The reason why the gauntlet is so well-known however, is due to Chrom vs. Ephraim. Chrom vs. Ephraim was the Round 2 on the Princes’ side, and despite the lack of the multiplier, scores remained astonishingly close to the point that sometime during the match the difference between scores was a mere 600, 414 points (https://www.reddit.com/r/FireEmblemHeroes/comments/5yrm9b/final_statistics_for_the_chrom_vs_ephraim_fight/#bottom-comments). This battle heated up the community and both sides were very cordial with each other despite the rivalry. The match ended with Ephraim’s victory, and what followed was a massive curbstomp. Lucina, like with all her matches, handily won due to the size of her army.
  • April: Wyvern Riders vs. Pegasus Knights (No Multiplier)
    • Winner: Camilla (27,691,013,589 /  6,546,363,179)
    • Final Contenders: Camilla and Minerva
    • Participants: Hinoka, Camilla, Cordelia, Cherche, Palla, Minerva, Subaki, Beruka
    • The second voting gauntlet, and what I like to describe as what the first gauntlet would have been like had there been no Chrom vs. Ephraim. The finals round featured a bigger curbstomp than that of Lucina vs. Ephraim, and it didn’t help that the participants were overall less popular compared to that of the first gauntlet despite the lack of ranking for Alfonse and Sharena. The community started to become even more bitter at the voting gauntlet due to how both gauntlets featured an overwhelming landslide by a 3DS female. On a different note, if I recall correctly, this was the gauntlet in which the option of 200 flags was implemented, as the first gauntlet only allowed a maximum of 100 flags being spent. Additionally, this gauntlet was the only gender unequal gauntlet so far, with 7 out of the 8 participants being female.
  • May: Battle of the Mages (2x Multiplier)
    • Winner: Tharja (31,005,640,020 / 29,896,726,477)
    • Final Contenders: Tharja and M!Robin
    • Participants: Linde, Tharja, Sanaki, Julia, Leo, Henry, M!Robin, Merric
    • This was the first gauntlet to implement a multiplier as an answer to the massive score discrepancy between juggernaut teams and less popular teams, specifically a 2x multiplier for teams that were at a disadvantage (a 10% disadvantage or something like that I’m really bad at explaining how the stronger-weaker thing works). However, sheer numbers could not work around the multiplier. I could be wrong, but I felt like the community was particularly bitter during this gauntlet because of yet another curbstomp by a 3DS female, although the gap was far less than previously seen. On the plus side, I would like to argue that this was the gauntlet with the best chance of a male winner so far. The difference between Tharja’s and M!Robin’s scores were 1,108,913,543. Compare to Corrin vs. Gaius, which had a difference of 1,089,274,317 with the implementation of higher multipliers (please correct my math if I’m wrong). Either way, people were becoming increasingly frustrated with the flaws of the gauntlet.
  • June/ July: The War of the Clerics (Varying Multiplier)
    • Winner: Elise (31,957,922,486 /  31,427,206,622)
    • Final Contenders: Elise and Priscilla
    • Participants: Maria, Lachesis, Elise, Sakura, Mist, Lissa, Clarine, Priscilla
    • The gauntlet with the least amount of controversy and the least amount of attention. By now, people were getting tired of the gauntlet and its predictability, and clerics aren’t exactly the most popular units on Heroes. This was the first gauntlet to implement the multiplier that varies. According to the official website, the formula for how big the multiplier will be is ((Duration * 0.1) + 3.1), with the highest possible multiplier being 7.5x. This was also the first gauntlet to feature an unexpected final contestant because if I recall correctly, people expected Elise vs. Lissa rather than Elise vs. Priscilla. The projected winner still won however, something I will talk about later.
  • August: Battle at the Beach (Varying Multiplier)
    • Winner: NS!F!Corrin (27,048,638,391 / 25,959,364,074)
    • Final Contenders: NS!F!Corrin and YS!Gaius
    • Participants: YS!Gaius, YS!Frederick, NS!Leo, NS!Xander, YS!F!Robin, YS!A!Tiki, NS!F!Corrin, NS!Elise
    • To save myself some sanity, I’m gonna ditch the exclamation points (NS = Nohrian Summer, YS = Ylissean Summer by the way). This was arguably the most balanced gauntlet because everyone had relatively equal popularity (all were at least top 100 in the Choose Your Legends Poll). Thus, because people were more spread out within the teams, this was also the least predictable gauntlet and the gauntlet with the best use of multipliers. Additionally, this was the first gauntlet to have orb rewards during the gauntlet via gauntlet quests and not after, and we actually get more orbs out of it to boot. The multipliers actually made a difference, as Gaius wouldn’t have made it to the finals or perhaps even past the first round without them. However, while Gaius going to the finals and beating the odds was indeed talked about, I find that the community mostly focused on Leo’s loss and that the community was rather salty at how the multipliers affected the rounds (mostly from that of Team Frederick and especially Team Leo). A lot of people found this gauntlet really fun though, salt aside. 

Some Notes

  • For a male to even get to the finals, they need to be sectioned off to their own side
    • Granted, the only time a male wasn’t sectioned off to their own side is the second gauntlet, but that brings me to my next point
  • The female side always has more participants and are more popular
    • Just compare the scores from the female side with the male side. The female side will always boast more numbers, meaning they had more people on their side.
  • Characters from the 3DS games tend to garner more support
    • All the winners were from 3DS games, and 2 out of the 5 gauntlets had final contenders from 3DS games (to be fair though, one gauntlet was comprised entirely out of 3DS characters)
  • 3DS females have the edge in the gauntlet
    • 3DS + female = more popular if we take the above points into consideration
  • The gauntlet / gauntlet winner tends to be predictable
    • It really is, although one can dream (including me). While there were some things that weren’t predicted, in general the gauntlet is predictable, which is why it’s not a particularly well-liked mode. After all, it’s really telling when all the winners so far have been 3DS females. There will come a day, however, when a male wins. 
  • Multipliers cannot overcome overwhelming differences in army size
    • Multipliers only decrease the score gaps and can only really make a difference (difference as in make a character win) if both contenders are of relative popularity and thus have relatively similar army sizes. Furthermore, because it is impossible to coordinate all the members of an army, it is essentially impossible to coordinate when the multipliers occur, so when the multipliers happen is pretty much only known through the power of math and there’s not much one can do to affect whether or not a multiplier will activate.  

Conclusion

Yeah, this got lengthy real fast. This somehow low key turned into a recap of the gauntlet. I still love playing the gauntlet, but as I mentioned, it has a lot of flaws. Heck, I didn’t even mention all of its flaws. However, IS is actively making changes to the gauntlet system to make it more fun and less predictable. Who knows how the gauntlet will evolve and change, or even if those changes will be for the better, but at least we get feathers and orbs out of it.

Anyways, thank you for reading this much!

Tell Me How...

Pairing: JungkookxYou

Synposis: If only you told him you liked him sooner, maybe things would’ve been different.

Genre: Angst

Author’s Note: Please… just please don’t ask me about Golden. I know. I’m working on it. I had to write this. It’s in first person because I felt that format was the best at the time and I’m currently going through this. Everything in this story has and IS happening to me and I thought writing about it would make me feel better and it didn’t. You ever just hate yourself for being shy and not taking chances? Because that’s how I am right now. Sorry my comeback is this somewhat diary, angsty post but I had to get it out. It’s not my best work but I mostly wrote this for me. Again, I apologize… (Also the title comes from Paramore’s Tell Me How because I wrote this to that song and it describes how I feel…)


           We were friends. At least I thought we were. I considered us friends. And maybe if I didn’t in the first place, then maybe I wouldn’t feel this empty. Maybe I wouldn’t care. Maybe I’d brush what happened off my shoulder. Maybe I wouldn’t regret doing what I did. Maybe you wouldn’t stare at me with your saddened eyes when I walk past you and pretend to be unaffected. What I wouldn’t give to talk to you normally again. How we used to be before I messed everything up. Now when I see you, I’m only reminded of what could’ve been and what used to be.

           I loathed you when we first met. You were new to the company and I had already been there a couple of months. I always wanted to be everyone’s favorite cashier and one glance at you, I knew you’d be competition. My initial attraction to you was put on hold because of that. Maybe if I haven’t thought that way in the beginning and accepted it, things would’ve been different now.

           “Excuse me… Y/N… can you help me?” You nervously asked me the second week you were on a register. A register that just coincidentally happened to be near mine. I didn’t want to help you, I’m not gonna lie. But I did. I walked over and, without a word, fixed the problem with you. I wanted to give the impression I was irritated with you but then you smiled your cute little smile at me and suddenly my face was flushed. If I realized then how I felt, maybe things would’ve been different now.

           “You and Jungkook would be a cute couple,” My best friend and coworker, Julia, would comment ever so often after seeing us together. By now, you’d been working with us for about five months and I had warmed up to you. As I said when I first saw you, you were everyone’s favorite. You were tall, muscular, attractive, well-mannered, and every hopeless romantic girl’s “Disney Prince.” Well, you were to everyone but me. I only saw you as a coworker and I refused to see you any other way. No matter how many times people thought we were cute together or how the customers’ mistaken us for dating. No matter how I was amazed that you were different from our other male coworkers who were immature. No matter how I did finally admit you were kind of cute and you were a sweetheart. And maybe if I would’ve admitted to those things a little more, then maybe things would’ve been different now.

           “Wow you’re old…” You playfully commented on the day before my birthday several months later. Now I looked forward to working with you and I didn’t know why. Maybe because I’d have someone fun to talk to and attractive to stare at when you were busy with the customers and not paying me any attention.

           “Oh, I’m sorry you’re still a child,” I playfully joked back. We bickered about our slight age difference without noticing a customer entering your lane. They watched as we fought back and forth before clearing their throat.

           “I don’t mean to interrupt your flirting…” They laughed.

I turned red instantly after hearing the customer say that but I turned redder when you replied with, “Nah, she’s too old for me.” You smiled at me when you said this and I must admit, my heart leapt. And maybe I thought about you for a couple of days after that. Maybe my desire to see you grew even more. Maybe Julia’s words about us being cute together soared through my mind for days, weeks, months. But maybe isn’t good enough in this world. If that maybe back then was a sure thing, then maybe things would’ve been different now.

           After that incident, you decided you didn’t like cashiering anymore and they placed you as the person who handles carts instead. To not see you directly anymore honestly broke my heart but you were still around. By now, however, I began doing what I always do when my feelings for someone grows. I become insanely shy and try to avoid the person I like. I thought it’d work since you spent most of your days outside. But it didn’t. Every time you’d come in the store, you’d speak to me.

           “Hi, Y/N!”

           “Do some work, Y/N.”

           “You’re never working when I come in here. I was a better cashier.”

And because I couldn’t just let you tease me without me responding, I played along.

           “Jungkook, I need a cart.”

           “Cart boy, where are my carts?”

           “Do you ever do anything, cart boy?”

           “Hurry up, cart boy, I don’t have all day to wait for you.”

Our other coworkers seemed to catch on to our playful fights and assumed one of us liked one another. Of course, that person was me. So, to not have anyone notice my true feelings, I began calling the other cart guys, “cart boy,” a nickname I originally only wanted to tease you with. My feelings were obvious and maybe if I didn’t try to deny them and hide them, things would’ve been different now.

“Jungkook has a girlfriend,” our coworker, Jasmine, who went to the same school as you told me one day. “I think they just started dating. They’re cute.”

“I saw Jungkook’s girlfriend! She’s beautiful! A model almost!” Another coworker said after seeing you and your girlfriend come in the store one day together.

“She’s pretty, but you’re pretty too. I think you guys should still date…” Julia said as she rolled her eyes at the situation. Meanwhile, my heart broke slightly every time your girlfriend was mentioned. I even added you on social media where Julia told me you showed off your girlfriend. She was right. Your girlfriend was pretty, beautiful even. And you looked so happy with her and after that, I decided to deny my feelings for you even more. And soon the playful relationship between us took a small break. I’d try to stop staring at you so much and try to tell myself it wouldn’t work anyway because work relationships never work. You still treated me the same. One day you even noticed my demeanor was slightly off when near you.

“Are you okay, Y/N?” You asked one day when I didn’t respond to one of your jokes.

“I’m fine!” I threw on a fake smile that we both didn’t believe but played off. Maybe then if I would’ve told you what was wrong, things would’ve been different now.

I gave up on you for a while until the new school year started and found out you were single. She had cheated. That girl who made you smile brightly and constantly checking your phone while at work, smiling down at it, and who, I’m sure, you spoiled, was unfaithful to you. You didn’t let it show but I couldn’t help but imagine how hurt you must’ve been. So, to cheer you up, I began calling you, “cart boy” again and teasing you. And at first I thought it was just me trying to cheer up my coworker who I saw as a friend and to see smile again. But then you started to look at me. Really look at me. I’d catch you staring at me and then quickly turn away. You began to make sure to always tease me whenever we saw each other. You’d go out of your way to do things for me. Our coworkers noticed this and commented on it. You only brushed it off while I blushed. Sometimes I wouldn’t pay attention to where I was going and almost run into you. This happened on too many occasions – almost as if we were in a movie and the main couple kept coincidentally running into each other and that’s how the audience knew – it was them who were meant to be. I guess it was silly of me to think like that. But I did. And my feelings for you grew. And this time I thought it’d be okay to admire you from afar without you knowing. Maybe if I would’ve told you then, things would’ve been different now.

“He likes you, he’s just shy.”

“You two flirt non-stop. Just date.”

“You guys are literally perfect for each other.”

“Everyone knows you like him. Hell, he probably even knows.”

Two years. I’ve heard this for two years. And I try not to let it get to me because I couldn’t and didn’t want to believe you liked me. How could you? You’ve seen me at my worse when I’ve come into work, hair disarray, tired, makeup-less, disheveled clothes, runny noses, and red eyes. You’ve seen me break down and cry at work because of rude customers or because of family problems. You’ve seen me become overly-excited for celebrities who don’t know of my existence yet I claim them as my, “husbands.” You’ve seen me get frustrated and pissed off to the point I cussed everyone out. You’ve seen me at my best. When I come in to work with my life together and I feel great and the smile plastered on my face shows it. But my mind thinks of only how you’ve seen me at my worse and how could you possibly have any feelings for me? And maybe if my self-esteem wasn’t so low back then and I realized for myself you could’ve liked me, then maybe things would be different now.

           Eventually that day came where I couldn’t bear it anymore. My feelings for you were – are – too strong and I couldn’t take it. I tried to give other guys a chance and date other people but they don’t live up to you. They’re not you. And all I want is you. My shyness was back when you were around. I was staring at you more. You made me stutter on my words too often. You made my mind go blank for too long. And I wanted nothing more than to just take a chance and tell you how I feel about you. I’m not in love with you – I don’t know you well enough to be in love with you. But I do strongly like you. I like you a lot. Suddenly I, too, thought we’d be a cute couple together. So, I gathered all the little courage I had in me. I was going to tell you how I felt about you that day. And I did.

           “Honestly, Jungkook, I really like you. I have for a while now and you probably guessed this already since our coworkers always hint this at you but I just wanted you to hear it from me. I’ve liked you for over a year now. I hope this doesn’t affect our friendship!” I stuttered to him before our shift began.

           His face was red. Really red. I avoided his eyes though. I felt as if I could vomit at any moment. I was expecting the worse response ever. He was gonna tell me he wasn’t interested. He only saw me as a coworker. Our relationship was definitely going to change because of this.

           “I’m sorry…”

Too good to be true.

           “I have a girlfriend…”

I knew he didn’t like me.

           “I wish you would’ve told me sooner…”

What?

           “If I didn’t have a girlfriend, I would have loved to talk to you and get to know you more…”

Heart break.

           And he walked away. And I stood there feeling empty. I felt numb. I couldn’t cry over this guy or at work. It was a stupid reason to cry. I waited too long. I should’ve told him way back when I first noticed my feelings. Maybe it would’ve been me that he’d have to tell his current girlfriend that he was dating. But it’s not. Life’s not a fairy tale. And no matter how much I feel there’s a connection between us and maybe, just maybe, somewhere in the future, we’re fated for one another, we’re not. Life’s not a movie and he’s not a, “Disney Prince,” and I’m not a damsel in distress looking for her true love.

           And now he stares at me with those sad eyes again and I try to pretend that I’m not affected about what happened. I told him I didn’t want out relationship to end but I feel as if I ended it. We quickly look away when we catch each other looking at one another now. The playful air around us is now dead. And it kills me inside. I don’t care if you don’t like me, don’t ignore me. I’m too embarrassed to begin a conversation with you right now, please start it first, please? Don’t let this three years of knowing and getting along with one another go to waste. That will break me more than knowing I must give up my two-yearlong crush on you. Don’t just stare at me when I come into your presence. I don’t want to hear everyone tell me you’re looking at me. I don’t want to be afraid to be near you. I don’t know how to feel about you anymore and it’s killing me. I remember why I don’t have crushes. I don’t know how to salvage our relationship when neither of us are trying to fix it. I don’t want my feelings to fade for you but at the same time, I feel I have to let you go. And maybe, if there were feelings there for me at one point, you should let them go, too. I’m sad for now. I will be for a while but I’ll just have to face reality:

           We were never meant to be.

Inked

Soulmate AU, the first words your soulmate says to you are written on your body somewhere, yours say “I don’t actually drink coffee like Dean.” You started watching Supernatural because of the fictional Dean Winchester, daydreaming about Jensen Ackles being your soulmate. But he wouldn’t be, would he? (2.6K)

Read more by spnjensenfanfic Read it on AO3

“Thank you so much for the tickets to this, Cassandra!” You gushed to your best friend. This con was a double whammy - you could look at two fictional Deans that you loved (one from Gilmore Girls, one from Supernatural). But really… You and Cassandra both knew you were here for the latter. Jensen Ackles was everything you dreamed of. Since Supernatural had started three years ago and Cassie had told you there was a Dean on it and you had watched the pilot, you were hooked. 

As a gift for your birthday, she brought you to the convention in your city, both to support a show you both loved and hoping that being surrounded by so many people saying “Dean” would reveal to you your soulmate. You weren’t behind compared to everyone else, well - not until your twenty second birthday last Monday. Now you were statistically later than the average. Cassie had met her soulmate, Julia, two years prior, and she was tagging along for the convention to show her support and keep another set of eyes out for you. 

Most of your friends had pretty unique phrases inked on their skin, and yours was unique enough to be significant but bothersome enough to occassionally leave you tossing and turning in the middle of the night. Were the tattoos ever wrong? And was the person you were destined to be with named Dean, know a Dean, or just talk about a Dean? You had spent half your teenagerhood fearing half of your school’s football team. Not only was the worst linebacker on the team named Dean, but everyone he hung out with was equally as awful, both on and off the field. 

This caused you to turn to fictional Deans, and hope beyond hope that maybe your fantasized Dean would pop out of the screen or page and say those words you needed to hear. 

And that is how you found yourself at the coffee shop with Julia and Cassandra, waiting in a long line for one of the best cups of joe in town. You were trying to eye the menu at the front for their special muffins of the day, but Julia kept tapping on your toes. 

You glanced at her, and she made a frantic gesture behind you, to which you rolled your eyes and focused back on the muffins. Julia was not having this, and spun you around so that you were face to face with the person behind you in line. 

Well, it would turn out, not face to face - face to chest. Because the person you were facing was much taller than you. And tilting your head up, you realized who it was. 

“Oh my god, Dean!” Jensen smiled at you while you composed yourself, realizing your error, “I mean Jensen, hi!” Cassandra had turned around as well at this point and her and Julia were staring at Jensen. He just smiled at you all as you took him in and the shock wore off.

Holy cow he was very different up close. 

The camera was very forgiving, it smoothed out the small imperfections in his face, but the more you looked the less you would call them imperfections. Small freckles dotted his nose and under his eyes, and his eyes creased when he smiled, and you realized they would turn into deep squinted lines as he aged. 

“Next order please!” The barista behind you hollered, a gentle touch on your elbow from Cassie made you realize that it was you. Half a second of staring at Jensen felt like a million years, and you smiled sheepishly at him before turning back around. 

You ordered for yourself, and feeling generous after your very recent celebrity encounter, decided to cover for your friends. As they were mulling over their order, you turned back around to Jensen, who was staring out the window, respecting you and your friends’ privacy while you paid. 

“Jensen? Excuse me?” He turned back to you at the sound of his name, his shoulders tensing a little, probably not wanting to make a scene in a coffee shop before a panel, asking for autographs and photos. But that’s not what you asked. “Can I please buy you a coffee? My treat.” 

He gave you a more relaxed smile than before, less tension in his animated eyebrows, and in your haste and fumbling, you turned back around before he could say anything, and shouted over the din of the crowd and your friends, “and a medium black coffee as well, please!”

Jensen let out a throaty chuckle, “I don’t actually drink coffee like Dean.” And your eyes widened, an apology forming on your lips, but he beat you to it - “its okay, can I just have a latte with a little sweetener, please?” 

You nodded with a sheepish grin on your face, turning back to the barista to change the order. But after you paid, expecting your friends to have shuffled on a little farther, they were exactly where they were two minutes prior, staring open-mouthed at you when you bumped into them. 

“What?” you murmured under your breath, “should I not have bought him a coffee?” 

Cassandra rolled her eyes exasperatedly, and yanked on your hoodie. The zipper popped off and skidded across the floor, and you got out a flustered “hey!” before she managed to draw your attention to the words scrawled across your shoulder, revealed underneath your pink tank top. 

And you froze. 

And Cassandra and Julia froze. 

And you were still staring at your written tattoo in awe and confusion when a tentative hand entered your vision and brushed gentle calloused fingers along your shoulder. 

You unfroze then, eyes quickly finding Jensen’s. His open and wide in shock, eyelashes dark and ready to catch the sparkling liquid that was pooling in his green gems. 

Your mind whirred into overdrive, sometimes it was one way, sometimes people heard the words their soulmate would say hundreds of times before they would say the right thing back. You struggled not to get your hopes up, trying to articulate to one of your favourite actors your question. “But… do you… How do I….”

He furrowed his brow for a moment, struggling to understand, before noticing your friends looking to him. He clued in then. He kept his gaze on you as he bent down on one knee, and rolled his pants up over his right kneecap. 

And there, written in clean lines in a circle around his boyish knee, were your first words to him, “Oh my god, Dean!” And you gasped, covering your face with your hands, embarrassed that both your first words to each other were because you couldn’t disconnect reality from fiction. 

How pathetic of you. 

But Jensen didn’t seem to mind. He gave you a new smile, a wide-blown foolhardy grin, a weight released from his shoulders. He reached for your hand, twining your fingers together, and asked “what’s your name?”

You were suddenly inexplicably shy. “Y/N.” His eyes squinted further with warmth, happy. And you felt full of light and as though you could accomplish anything. 

After half a minute of soulful staring and ignoring your friends, your drinks arrived, and Jensen gave you a soft flutter of a kiss against your jaw as he left with his drink, your phone number, and a promise to call you after the panel and signings. 

Your friends were very accommodating for your shock, pulling you along gently back to the convention center and revealing your pass to the attendants before finding your seats near the back of the crowd. Both of them had one arm linked through yours the whole time, wide grins accompanying soft squeezes to your arms intermittently. 

You waited with the rest of the crowd, stunned and dazed. And as you began to thaw and look around, you realized that many others were in shock due to seeing their two favourite actors. But you could guarantee that no one was in as much shock as you were. 

When the boys eventually came on the stage, girls screamed with excitement. But you sat there stoic as a stone. You saw Jensen again and were wondering how what had just happened had happened. Wondering if it had happened at all. 

But you could tell it did. Because Jared was grinning ear to ear, and Jensen was pink and one knee was bouncing in anxiety, and you could see the barista’s handwriting with “Y/N” scrawled on the side of the disposable mug he carried and set down on the floor next to his chair. 

And then you settled down for a delightful two hours. You watched as Jensen answered fan questions, using this time to get to know him, get to see him. He shifted in his seat often, moving constantly. He was very aware of Jared, they touched and wove around each other when they moved. They sought each other with their hands for support and amusement, had deep meaningful eye contact. And you began to wonder if you soon would be able to recognize the subtle emotions of his face, brows, and lips. What it would be like. How it would work. 

And you zoned in and out of thought as the afternoon wore on, happy and content for the first time since your twentieth birthday, after you were still alone for it. But not now. Julia and Cassandra were equally as enraptured as you, listening to the two men, holding hands and relaxed in the space and with themselves. 

And it was near the end of the question period before someone asked the question that was asked every convention that the boys never answered: “so, can we see your soulmate tattoos?” 

The air stilled around you. Both men looked at each other. The crowd stopped shifting, girls waiting to hear the response they thought they knew the answer to. 

No. It was always no. Rumour had it that both lead actors on the show were still soulmate-less. Still alone without their other half. And so many actors had had problems with revealed tattoos before they found their one. So many scams and falsehoods that they would have to maneuver around to find their ideal person. 

But this time they paused, and looked at each other. 

Jared took his beanie off and ruffled his hair, he leaned on his mic stand and said into the microphone, “actually, sure.” He gave the crowd a moment to cheer and cry, and then another moment for them to realize why he was finally comfortable showing it, and then the crowd was silent in a different way. 

Jared chuckled at the reaction, “sorry ladies,” he looked over at Jensen then, “we started filming for season four last week, as I’m sure you know. And I think I’ve hinted before in an interview that my tattoo said something about the show.” Murmured confirmation from the crowd. “And long story short, she showed up on set three days ago, playing a character in the next season, saying exactly what I wanted to hear.” 

The crowd started cheering again, and Jared lifted up his shirt to reveal a long sentence etched into his ribs. He let a few cameras flash before dropping it again and glancing at Jensen. 

Then the crowd truly went wild, because Jensen stood up and said quickly into the microphone, “and I’ve got a story for you today, too.”

You couldn’t stop staring at this man. He stood up and addressed the crowd. He was proud. Of you. He was all confidence and ease, a new warmth to his person that you hadn’t noticed before, possibly the alleviation of the anxiety of finding himself aging without a soulmate. But oh, did he look the opposite of aged now. 

His hair was a little ruffled from running his hands through it, his armpits a little damp. But he looked perfect. Tousled and flustered and so unbelievably happy. You grinned then, too. And reached a hand out to hold Cassie’s hand. You rested your head on her shoulder, “thank you Cassie, thank you.” So unquestionably grateful for the tickets she had gotten for you all. For leading you here.  

Cassie leaned back into you as Jensen began to talk. 

He wasn’t brief like Jared was. This was quite a tale. 

He started as a young child. How he had looked up professions online that led to the quickest soulmate discoveries, how he had chosen acting for that reason. He made friends with people named Dean, sought roles for films and shows with characters named Dean. And it was only once he landed the gig on Supernatural he had a good feeling in his gut. 

But, given how common his words were, he didn’t realize how often they would get said. Jared said them numerous times within the pilot, and he actually yanked Jared aside to make him show Jensen his tattoo and prove that they weren’t. Jared chimed in then, affirming this story, causing the crowd to laugh. 

And Jensen went on, he told the crowd how frustrating it was sometimes to play Dean, to question every person that came up, how it desensitized him to his soulmate’s words. 

And then. “And that’s why when I actually met her, I didn’t say anything back, because I was unsure, and scared, and hopeful.” And you were handed a tissue by Julia because you were crying. Because he had been waiting too. You both had. And it was a shock for that waiting to be over. To find your soulmate in someone like him. 

And as he finished and the crowd cooed and whispered appreciatively and with a little resignation at both the boys finding their soulmates within a few weeks. But the mood was bright, and everyone filed out of the convention hall after the last few questions with expressions of happiness on their faces, soulmate stories always could cheer up a crowd. 

You waited in the hallway outside the autograph room with Julia and Cassandra, the two of them had pulled their books out of their bags and were passing the time waiting with you. Because although he was your certified soulmate, their mother hen behaviour didn’t let them leave you alone just yet. 

You shifted your weight from foot to foot. Suddenly anxious again. What if you were one of the few soulmates who didn’t work out? What if he found you plain? Then you remembered all the schooling and education surrounding the soulmate theory, and that he wouldn’t find you plain. And there were no reasons it shouldn’t work out. Despite your factual comfortings, you continued to shuffle, this time adding some tapping fingers against the wall. 

The click of the latch pulled the three of you out of your individual focuses, and Jensen glances the wrong way down the hall before whipping his head around in your direction and settling his eyes on you. 

When his face lit up in a grin you knew it would be okay, that your fears were for naught, and you were oh so lucky to be right here, right now. 

You were already reaching for him, a hand outstretched, when he said, “Hi,” his hand finding yours, “wanna go?”

anonymous asked:

could you write a drabble for robron and number 7?

How long has it been?

“How long has it been?”

5 months, 3 weeks, 2 days and almost 13 hours. He wasn´t going to tell Julia that though, that he was still counting. That he still hoped that at some point he´d be able to stop the clock.

It would just make him look pathetic and desperate.

Not that that wouldn´t be true, but they had only known each other for about 15 minutes and the fact alone that he was spending his Friday morning sitting on a dark brown leather couch in a small cosy room, surrounded by bookshelves and with a pillow in his lap; instead of lying in his bed, hiding under the covers and nursing the rest of last nights whiskey, made him feel vulnerable enough. Thank you very much.

He most certainly wasn´t ready to let her in on the full extent of his desolation and self-hate. At least not yet.

Maybe if he kept staring at the clock on the wall behind her he could somehow will time to go by faster.

“6 months,” he said.

Robert looked at her then, trying hard to act somewhat nonchalant. His voice was void of emotion, but his hands were gripping the pillow tightly by its edges. So tightly that his knuckles turned white. If nothing else, Robert had gotten good at hiding his real feelings again over the last couple of months.

“I´m doing fine.”

“Yes, I´m eating.”

“You don´t have to worry about me.”

The lies rolled off his tongue far easier these days.

Right after, they hadn´t.

Aaron had taken a sledgehammer to all of the walls Robert had carefully built over years, but at least he had still been a closed book to everyone else. That was until everything had fallen apart and he hadn´t been able to keep up the pretence any longer. Hadn´t had the strength to play tough. Not that he had talked to people about it, but the dark circles under his puffy eyes and his ashen complexion had been enough of a giveaway for anyone who had still cared enough to notice.

Julia gave him a kind smile and nodded. She was maybe in her late thirties, sitting across from him in a matching brown arm chair, her legs crossed, her long blonde hair in a braided bun on top of her head. It reminded him of Liv.

God, Robert missed Liv.

“And how would you say you´re coping with the separation?” Julia´s voice was soft and gentle. She sounded like she actually cared, not as if she was only pretending to be interested, because making him feel welcome and getting him to open up about things he didn´t want to share was her job. Not the way Diane sounded when she called once in a blue moon.

Robert let his eyes wander across the room, unwilling to look the therapist in the eye in fear of being found out and psychoanalysed, until they settled on the window. It was slightly fogged by the cold November air, little drops of condensation making their way from its top down to the windowsill, but he could still make out the row of cars driving by down below. People driving to work or bringing their kids to school. Functioning, well-adjusted adults, who had managed to get out of bed that morning and were able to go about their day without a pit in their stomach, without a constant feeling of dread.

It was so much easier to focus on them than to look at the counsellor in front of him, when he didn´t feel like he deserved the sympathetic look in her eyes.

“I´m coping,” he answered.

It was bullshit. Obviously.

Sure, nowadays he held out on opening a new bottle of alcohol until the early hours of the afternoon, instead of diving in as soon as he woke up in the morning. He had actually managed to send out two application letters that week (London flats were expensive and his savings wouldn´t last forever), but that was about it.

Victoria had called it progress. Robert new that it was nothing more than mere survival, unworthy of her praise.

Even four months after his move, his place was still covered in unopened boxes of flat-pack furniture. A manifestation of his reluctance to accept his new living situation and everything that came with it as fact, staring back at him every time he entered the place. The scattered boxes and emptied bottles mocking him for every terrible choice he´d ever made. But what really was doing him in now, months into this newfound so-called life oh his, was the lack of human interaction. These days, Victoria´s daily calls, which had grown more and more concerned as time passed by, and the two lines of small talk he shared with a rotating number of delivery men every night were the only reminders he had of the fact that there was indeed a world out there, behind his four walls.

Julia didn´t push for more right away. She just slid her round, gold-rimmed glasses up the bridge of her nose with her index finger and scribbled something into her notebook instead. It made Robert nervous. Made him feel like he hadn´t pulled that line off as well as he had hoped. It made him feel like maybe she knew.

He tightened his jaw and crossed his arms over the pillow. Drew it a little closer, until it was pressed against his chest, because the look on Juila´s face made him feel exposed and that was the only bit of protection he had in here.

“I know that this isn´t easy, but I can only help with whatever is going on with you, if you open up…” Julia said, but it was Victoria´s voice he heard it in.

It´s what she had been telling him ever since he had crashed on her couch that first night after Aaron had kicked him out. And she hadn´t let it go, even after Robert was out of her sight and trying his best to keep her worries at bay by sounding as convincingly okay as possible on the phone. Victoria hadn´t bought it, of course she hadn´t. She had always been able to see through his facade. So instead of giving up and letting it go, she had started to drop hints about therapy. About how it might be easier to talk to someone who wasn´t so involved in all of it, someone he wouldn´t feel pre-judged by.

Actually, it was her who had given him Julia´s number in the end, begging him to at least give it a try.

It had taken weeks, but in the end he hadn´t been able to refuse his little sister. Especially not since she was the only one still willing to put up with him after everything. His pride wasn´t worth losing that.

Wasn´t worth losing her.

“It´s…,”  Robert didn´t quite know how to explain the way he had been feeling for the past couple of months without giving away too much too soon.

“It´s been really hard,”  is what he settled on.  

There was more. Of course there was more.

I miss him. I miss my home. I miss my family. It´s hard, because in the end it was all my fault. It´s even harder, because I always knew that I would disappoint him. It was just a matter of time.

There was a voice inside his head, that unsurprisingly sounded a lot like his little sister, telling him to let it all out right then and there, just for the slight chance of feeling a little bit better afterwards, a little bit more like himself. It had been a long six months and Robert had grown so incredibly tired of pretending. He was desperate to just once go to bed without feeling like someone was punching him in the gut repeatedly, while his mind was running in circles. Just one night without the image of a crying Aaron clouding his every thought.

He didn´t though.

Because at the end of the day, no matter the pain, he was still Robert Sugden. He was still Jack´s son, which meant that he knew the consequences of letting other people in on your feelings and sharing things they might not be ready to hear, far too well. It was going to take him more than twenty minutes to trust the woman in front of him with all of his deepest darkest secrets, if he ever would.

But at least this felt like a start.

He wasn´t sure if this would actually help, but he owed it to Victoria to try.

He certainly owed it to Aaron.

And maybe Robert even owed himself the chance of getting better, no matter how badly he had messed things up.  

Especially, if he wanted to keep his hopes of ever being allowed to come home again alive.

Favorite John Lennon Songs Conclusion

Hi there everyone. I’m sorry for the lack of activity on my page for the last few weeks. I’ve been busy with school and this thing called life, that apparently exists outside of the Internet (lol). But I feel bad that I left you all hanging without finishing up my list of what are my favorite songs from John. Considering how my schedule from here, till the end of December will be busy, I’ll have less time to be on Tumblr. Every now and then I’ll post a quick pic or vid. But as for my longer stuff, like my lists, or anything of that magnitude, will take time. But, just so I don’t leave this list undone, I’m going to end it by naming the remaining 5 songs, and giving a brief explanation as to why I like them. So here were go:


Number 5: “Girl”

A haunting and simple song, that describes what John believed to be his ideal lady. It reminds me a lot of Billy Joel’s “She’s Always a Woman”, in that it’s describing a woman that the singer seems to love very much, even though what’s being said is less than flattering. It’s fascinating (if not saddening) that John would say years later, that the woman he was describing was in fact Yoko. Because in all honesty, the lyrics of “Girl”, although wonderful, are also negative and melancholy. I mean every time i hear it, I can’t help but think “poor dude…”

But it’s those same elements that make it a great song. It resonates with people because many can relate to it. It’s a song about complicated love, and how many people haven’t experienced that?


Number 4: Lucy In the Sky With Diamonds

I talked a bit about my feelings on John’s parenting skills in the past. It’s great to know he was there for Sean. I wish he could have tried harder with Julian. Although to his credit, he was getting there by the end of his life. And even though he was never too close to his eldest son, that didn’t mean he never wrote songs for him, or never wrote ones that were inspired by him. And that’s exactly what this song is: a fun little number, inspired by a picture Julian drew when he was just a toddler. It’s wonderful to know that John found inspiration from Julian, and used it to write one of his catchiest tunes.

The song is upbeat, and it has the psychedelic feel of the mid and late 60’. I’m not really into the psychedelic sound, but for some reason it works for me here. The lyrics are, as is to be expected by John, abstract and weird. But considering how the picture that the song is based off was adorably unusual, why shouldn’t the lyrics be as well. The imagery being described in the lyrics are descriptive and dreamlike like “Across the Universe”, but less ambiguous. By that I mean, even though it sounds odd, it’s evokes a happy feeling. “Lucy In the Sky With Diamonds” is very much it’s own thing, and definitely in a good way.


Number 3: Julia

This song is heartbreaking. Before Yoko Ono, there was Julia: John’s mother and, when all is said and done, greatest muse. Although many of his songs seem to hint or allude to her (”Girl” actually being considered one of them), “Julia” is the first and perhaps only song that is specifically about his mom. And just like the rest of John’s work, the lyrics to this song are vivid, imaginative, and create this ever so saddening picture of a lost man, who still mourns the loss of his mother. But it also expresses his never ending love and admiration for her. And just like “Across the Universe”, the lyrics is what really makes it great. I do love John’s singing here though. I love hearing the more softer and mellower side of his vocals.

Of course I can’t forget to mention that the song hints at Yoko, since the line “ocean child” is the English translation of her name. I would have liked the song more if it had just been specifically about his mom, but it is what it is. And  “Julia” is nothing less than brilliant.

Number 2: In My Life

I originally had this one for number 3. But after some thought, I realized I loved this one slightly more. What can I say, I’m a sucker for sentimentality in music. To be fair though, “In My Life” in sentimentality at its best. True and ever so endearing.

This is perhaps the first, real, personal song John ever wrote (according to him). John wrote a lot of songs, but most of them were love songs. And while they do hint at some aspects of his life or personality, “In My Life” is basically his “Penny Lane”, in that he took his past and made it into a song. This was also a song in which much of the melody was done by him (with a little help from Paul of course).

It’s all about reflecting on the past, and remembering old friends and holding on to good memories. Above all else, it’s a song that reminds us to love and to continue to love those people and places that are important to us. It definitely highlights the softer side of John and for that alone, it makes it one of my favs.

And finally…


Number 1: Help

John really was a one of a kind man. Sometimes I love him, and other times I hate him. Considering how many of his personal choices upset me, it’s crazy that I even see him as my favorite of the dudes. But honestly, whenever I begin to think that I really don’t like John anymore, this song ALWAYS brings me back to loving him. It’s that good.

Like “In My Life”, “Help” is another personal song of John’s. But instead of focusing on the past, he’s focusing on the present. More specifically, he’s calling for help to anyone who might be willing to listen. Why? Because by this point in The Beatles career, the pressure was starting to get to John. On top of that, he was starting to gain a little bit of weight, which made him self-conscious. He would later dub this era as his “Fat Elvis” period. Personally, I thought he looked fine. He looked healthy and very attractive. In fact, I think 1965 was the year that John looked the most attractive, especially in the movie “Help” (John + turtleneck = super hot).

But I digress. “Help” is a very honest song that showcases John being very vulnerable, and openly asking for support from others. What keeps the songs lyrics from appearing to outright strong is the upbeat and fast-paced tempo. On the one hand it kind of keeps the songs message from being as obvious as it should. But at the same time, the quick and fun pace of the music gives the song a sense of urgency, making John’s cry for help all the more intense. And while I know John would continue to right many songs that express so much of who he was, there’s something about “Help” that gets to me.

I guess it has to do with the fact that I’m quite shy, and I often have a hard time dealing with pressure, especially in though situations. This song is all about realizing that you can’t deal with everything that life throws at you by yourself. It’s ok to admit you’re not in control. It’s ok to ask for help. That’s a comforting message. And though I’m not famous and could never really understand how John felt during this point of his, I do know that stress and pressure are horrible…and it’s great when you don’t have to endure it alone.


Thank you to everyone who has been patient, and thank you also for following my page. I really do appreciate it. God bless.

anonymous asked:

who are your closest friends here on tumblr?

HI ANON I’M SORRY. IK YOU SENT THIS LIKE A LONG TIME AGO AHH IM SO SORRY. I bascially did mutuals I talk to a lot and here and there. Idk I consider them close, but mostly b/c I love them a lot and I didn’t want to leave ppl I love out? b/c I love them? but bolded Urls are ones I talk to a lot lot/those that are in the gc

IK YOU DIDN’T ASK FOR ME TO EXPLAIN HOW WE GOT CLOSE OR STARTED FOLLOWING EACH OTHER BUT… I couldn’t stop typing lmao I love my mutuals so much

Keep reading

fic: wildfire (3/?).

“Alex has seen beautiful women before, her sister is one of them, but not one has ever taken her breath away so quickly it felt like she was being knocked over.

Maybe it was simply the shock of seeing another person here when the school had seemed so desolate.

Or maybe, maybe, it was because that was the most beautiful woman that Alex has ever seen.”

or the one where alex teaches chemistry, maggie teaches history, and they teach each other a little something about falling in love.

rated e. alex/maggie. ~8.3k. read on ao3.

part one. part two.

Alex isn’t hiding.

Really. She isn’t.

She’s just….sitting at her desk with the door closed. That’s not hiding.

Alex is resting her head against her folded arms, her head reeling.

“Ms. Danvers, is it true?” he asks and Alex raises an eyebrow.

“That we’re learning about balancing chemical equations today? Yes,” Alex replies and Owen shakes his head.

“No! That you and Ms. Sawyer are dating!” He exclaims and Alex freezes in her place.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Hey are you still doing kent parson recs I was wondering if you had more before the update in case we need comfort in a dark time

I got you nonnie 💕 I’ve mostly been reading a bunch of amazing Patater fics lately so that is…basically all this is. Hope you enjoy them!

Light Me Up Like the Sun  by angryspaceravenclaw (10249 words)

Kent can’t stand his neighbour.  The guy who sings along to Andrea Bocelli at six in the morning, and cleans his apartment loudly at two am.  Kent also has an extreme crush on the bookshop owner who has his place right next to Bitty’s bakery.  Kent’s willing to deal with one if he gets the other–but little does he know how closely those two worlds are connected. 

Go Beside You by angryspaceravenclaw (5844 words)

Kent Parson knows what he is, and he’s fairly sure he knows what he’s worth.  It just seems like everyone else is determined for him to change his mind.

7-0-2 by Idday (4508 words)

Kent does not have hoes in different area codes.

What he does have are the numbers of several professional hockey players discreetly saved into his phone—Dallas, Chicago, Los Angeles, Toronto.

It works for them, because they all have the same thing to lose as he does and they all understand his schedule and none of them expect to talk at all between visits.

It works for Kent because he doesn’t believe in getting attached.

(Alyosha is different.)

Careful the Tale You Tell by tiptoe39 (33725 words)

Kent has been telling himself a story, ever since the Q. It’s the epic story of Parse and Zimms, and he’s in love with it.

But sometimes life gets in the way of the stories we tell ourselves.

Do It Right the Second Time (and maybe the third)by  angryspaceravenclaw (2152 words)     

It was just a thing they had.  It was a thing that was there, hovering over them as their relationship went from enemies on the ice, to planning a wedding.  Kent just didn’t think about how they hadn’t done it right the first time.  But there was always a second.  And a third.  

Pushing the Limits of my Heart by benjji2795 (24490 words)

Bitty passes in front of Kent, drawing Tater’s attention to him.

 They lock eyes and Tater’s expression immediately turns sour, while at the same time his eyes widen slightly.  He looks sort of like a giant, angry buck caught in a car’s headlights, and despite himself, Kent finds it strangely cute.

 “Why is Parson here?” Tater almost hisses, his shoulders tensing up to his ears.

 Kent looks down at his lap as he feels his cheeks heat up and his stomach drop.  Jack was perhaps a little quick to dismiss his observation and say that it was possible that Tater didn’t hate him, because the man sitting a few feet away from Kent looks like he hates him with every fiber of his being.

You Break It, You Buy It by editingatwork (1723 words)

tumblr prompt: Patater + first kiss.

Kent breaks Tater’s nose during a game. Later, he gets kissed.

Kenny’s 2 Months of Cooking Dangerously by CoffeeStars (6086 words)

Kent has a mid-life crisis at 27 and starts cooking his way to enlightenment with his teammate, like that woman from the food movie about Julia Child. Or something like that.

Mashkov also keeps tweeting at him, and he doesn’t know why.

tumblr fics

My opinions on every single Shakespeare play

Most of this consists of things I wrote down a while ago when I was reading a play a day so I could keep them all straight in my head, particularly the ones I’ve only read once. 


COMEDIES

All’s Well That Ends Well – Forgettable and made me roll my eyes but still better than Love’s Labor’s Lost.

As You Like It – I’m left with a lot of questions at the end of this. Does Orlando know that Rosalind was Ganymede? If he’s friends with Ganymede now, won’t he wonder what happened to him? And shouldn’t he be friends with Rosalind knowingly before marrying her? Should a relationship be built on deception like that? I guess you could say the same about Twelfth Night, but Orsino finds out Viola was disguised before marrying her so actually no, you couldn’t.

Comedy of Errors – This might just be the silliest thing I’ve ever read but it made me laugh anyway. You’d really think they’d figure out they’ve been talking to different people by the end of Act 2 at the absolute latest, but whatever. The best line by far is: “If she lives till doomsday, she’ll burn a week longer than the whole world.” It’s because she’s really greasy.

Love’s Labor’s Lost - So boring and pointless I almost couldn’t finish it. Literally nothing at all happens the entire time and there’s no reason for any of them to like each other.

Measure for Measure – Having already read Henry VI Part 3 a couple of times, this was déjà vu in the worst possible way. Plus the ending was fucked up in a whole variety of ways. Also, I realized I have no idea who the protagonist is, though I guess I thought it was Isabella. Other than the malapropisms (at least one character in this play should definitely have a Twitter) and the marriages, it’s hard to see this as a comedy. The aforementioned marriages are all fucked up in their own ways, except for Claudio and Juliet who were already pretty much married so they don’t count. Isabella should have stayed a nun and stayed single, and the Duke is totally the kind of guy who wants to think he’s a good person when really he’s an irresponsible douchebag. Like just do your fucking job instead of fucking with everyone for the sake of fishing for compliments or playing the hero or whatever.

Merchant of Venice – I might be able to like this if it weren’t for the worst anti-Semitism I’ve ever been exposed to. I like Portia; I kind of wish she was in a different play. I think Antonio and Bassanio should just be together, and she could be perfectly happy being single. This is one pairing I actually think is convincing, but to be fair I’m usually not particularly invested in the idea of anyone ending up with anyone.

Merry Wives of Windsor – I had high hopes for this because Falstaff is in it, because apparently Queen Elizabeth specifically requested more Falstaff, so in that regard she knows what’s up (I disapprove of the fact that she wouldn’t let Shakespeare perform Richard II because Richard II is wonderful). This was very silly but I thought the part where Mistress Quickly mishears a ton of Latin words was funny. Also there’s this girl whose parents each want her to marry a different guy except she wants to marry a third guy who she actually likes and he likes her and stuff, and her parents are like “you can’t marry him because he hangs out with sketchy people like Prince Hal and Ned Poins” and I just think it’s hilarious that they have such a bad reputation. After Taming of the Shrew I almost didn’t want to read comedies ever again but I’m glad I stuck with it because most of them really aren’t like that at all.

Midsummer Night’s Dream – I love this and I can’t even explain why and I don’t really have a good reason for liking it; it just makes me lol, especially Nick Bottom. My favorite line is “In ten lines it is too long, making it tedious.” That’s a beautiful thing to say.

Much Ado about Nothing – I actually liked this one. It’s a tiny bit like Taming of the Shrew if Taming of the Shrew wasn’t horrible. I like that the leads have a healthy relationship based on friendship and mutual respect. They say they don’t want to get married because they just don’t want to have to settle for someone they don’t like enough, which I think is a good attitude to have cause it means they take marriage seriously, and they’re too afraid to be made fun of by each other to admit they like each other. Plus everyone likes Beatrice’s wit and outgoing personality instead of saying how awful she is and that she talks too much (for the record, Kate in Taming has waaayyyyy fewer lines than I expected her to have so that’s something to think about). I like how Benedick believes Hero when she says she was framed which was a pleasant surprise since I was worried he’d take Claudio’s side. It’s the part where Beatrice says “I’d eat his heart in the marketplace” and Benedick is on their side and doesn’t question or doubt them. And he and Beatrice were good friends first without being disguised as other people, except briefly but she might have known it was him. I like that he takes the high ground at the end by saying that it doesn’t matter what he said before and he doesn’t care what anyone says because he’s happy. And I like that he’s really, really picky about what he wants in a girlfriend but her hair color doesn’t matter. That was really funny.

Taming of the Shrew – Worst thing I ever read. First it’s all rape culture, and then it;s all abusive marriage. It has everything I can’t stand about certain kinds of modern comedies.

Twelfth Night – I didn’t think I’d like this one but I actually thought it was funny and really entertaining despite the fact that I don’t care who ends up together, so that tells me it’s doing something right. I also realized I remember whole passages that I had no idea I remembered from 8th grade.

Two Gentlemen of Verona – I don’t really have any strong feelings about this except that Proteus does not deserve a happy ending and I wonder what’s going to happen the next time he sees a woman other than Julia. But I guess that’s why they call him Proteus.

HISTORIES

King John – The whole thing was kind of just a will they/won’t they with the armies of England and France, but I like how extra Constance is, and Eleanor is pretty great which is why I’m pissed that she randomly dies offstage. Philip the Bastard is also an interesting character, but I still don’t really get how he walked into court one day a bastard and left it a Plantagenet.

Richard II – Love it; truly beautiful and tragic and has some of the prettiest, deepest lines I’ve read in Shakespeare, and it’s a reflection on the meaning of kingship that’s not seen elsewhere in the Histories. Richard is also not straight and seems kind of non-binary in the versions I’ve seen and I like that. Maybe part of the reason I like both of the Richards is that I see them as not straight. I know he’s no good at being king but I love him anyway. I didn’t think he was going to die though and was rather upset; when Bolingbroke was like “convey him to the Tower” I was like “oh shit, that’s where people go to die!” I mean I know they moved locations to Pomfret castle first, but that’s when I knew what was going to happen.

Henry IV, Part I – One of my favorites. I admit that at first I didn’t like Hotspur. I admit the most offensive thing about him to me was that he says he doesn’t like poetry. He struck the kind of person I can’t stand: loud, angry, annoying, and cares about things I think are stupid. But I’ve heard some different interpretations of his character, and I saw a production where he was really endearing and that got me to really like him. He’s a true chaotic good: he cares about justice first and doesn’t care who gets in the way of it, no matter how important they are. He really doesn’t deserve to die at all. Hell, he and Hal could probably be good allies if the circumstances were different. There are some really funny parts in this and Falstaff is great, and it’s actually really insightful when he says honor is a scutcheon in a way I wouldn’t have expected from him. Prince Hal strikes me as kind of a bro but he’s definitely more sympathetic for me in this one than the other two plays he’s in.

Henry IV, Part II – Honestly not much happens in this one until the end and I’m not sure if I can forgive Hal for what he did to Falstaff. The dude was so excited to go the coronation and see him and he was just like “I know thee not, old man.” It was cold, and normally when I say that I mean it in a good way but not this time. He was basically like “fuck off and die” and that’s exactly what he did. I’m not happy about that.

Henry V – I saw a joke summary of this that said “70% armed combat, 30% jokes” and that is completely accurate. This has its moments for sure. The comic relief characters aren’t as funny as Falstaff though, and I really can’t stand Pistol and couldn’t when he was briefly in the preceding play either. There are things I like about Henry V as a character, but sometimes I question his decisions. He manages to pull it all off somehow though, and that’s impressive.

Henry VI, Part I – I love this whole tetralogy. Joan of Arc was in this and that was a pleasant and unexpected surprise. York comes off as kind of a dick though. He and Somerset are the pettiest people ever. Plus I started to get some of Margaret’s backstory, and knowing what I know now I get why she’s so done with everyone by the time of Richard III. I still don’t forgive her for everything she ever said and I still don’t think she’s 100% a victim in all of this, but to be fair it turns out she is mostly a victim in all of this, and I get that she’s a bold person who’s willing to do what it takes to come out on top and survive, and this can be both a positive and a negative quality depending on the situation.

Henry VI, Part II – This one is largely about how York and Somerset’s pettiness almost destroyed England. Aside from that, this solidified for me that I really don’t like Henry, although Margaret continued to really grow on me in this one, and I feel bad for her that she has to put up with him and basically do everything for him. In spite of this, I find their relationship to be extremely entertaining. I like the part where she punches out the Duchess of Gloucester in front of the whole court and Henry’s just like “it’s whatever, she didn’t mean it” and the part where some guy fakes a miracle and they hit him to prove he can run away and Henry’s like “how could God let this happen?” but Margaret’s like “I thought it was funny watching him run away” (and I was like SAME; she really spends this whole play saying exactly what I’m thinking at any given time, particularly when it comes to Henry) and the part where they’re running away from the battle at the end and Henry can’t keep up because of fucking course he can’t and Margaret’s like “could you be any slower?” and he’s like “maybe we should just sit here and accept our fate.” He is such a wet blanket. I spent the whole thing yelling “Henry, what is wrong with you?!” at my book. While he’s not a terrible person he is mediocre and painfully stupid and I really don’t see him as having any redeeming qualities.  Also Richard shows up for like 5 minutes at the end to collect Somerset’s head and be called an “indigested lump” by someone he just fucking met, which incidentally is the same exact thing Henry said to him. Update: I finally figured out what it is I don’t like about Henry. It’s not even what he says to Richard in the Tower (that is not even half the reason I don’t like him, but for the record even if it was the entire reason it would be an excellent reason). It’s that I see him as childish and to me that’s an extremely negative quality, though I expect it’s also what makes him endearing to some people.

Henry VI, Part III – 10/10 I love it so much, I have a strong opinion on nearly every scene. Margaret is a badass in this one, Henry continues to be an ignorant, damp slice of bread, Richard is in it, and it has my favorite scene in all of Shakespeare when he kills Henry in the Tower, and another scene I love when he says “speak thou for me and tell them what I did” and then Margaret yells at Henry and says “art thou king and wilt be forced?” and her finest moment when she kills York, and the best piece of foreshadowing I’ve ever seen when Richard says about Margaret: “why should she live to fill the world with words?” Also Edward is a fuckboy and a bad influence. I’m ashamed to share a name with him. I kind of think he died of a deadly STD; serves him right.

Richard III – Favorite Shakespeare play, best thing I’ve read in a long time, and definitely one of the top five things I’ve ever read, especially taken together with Henry VI Part 3. It’s everything tragedy should be, parts of it are extremely relatable to me personally, I’ve memorized more of both plays than I care to admit, and it’s a good thing it’s short enough that I can read it over and over because that’s exactly what I intend to do. I don’t know why reading something about someone who makes all the wrong decisions would make me feel better about my life, but I think this is exactly what Aristotle meant when he said that tragedy should be cathartic. Also Richard is definitely ace as fuck and I will fight anyone who tries to say otherwise.

Henry VIII – First of all, Katharine deserved way better. Second of all, I feel like it really glossed over the part where he created the Anglican Church just so he could divorce her. Also there was some really shameless plugging of Queen Elizabeth at the end, so I’m guessing this was written during her reign, which would explain why Henry VIII doesn’t look as bad as he does literally everywhere else I’ve seen him (update: turns out it was written later). I seem to remember that he ended up killing Anne Boleyn and that didn’t happen in this play though I was kind of waiting for it to. I’ve really never read anything this positive about him, and that’s even counting the fact that he tossed Katharine aside after seeing Anne Boleyn once at a party. And I did find out that Buckingham’s real name is Henry, although it’s not like I needed another Henry to keep track of.

TRAGEDIES

Antony and Cleopatra – I really didn’t care for this one. Cleopatra seems like kind of a stereotype to me and I’m not terribly invested in either her or Antony. Romance isn’t really my thing unless it’s super compelling for some special reason or unless I like both the characters individually. This has neither of those qualifiers.

Coriolanus – I didn’t like this very much, even though it’s about Rome. Coriolanus is not a compelling figure to me; the whole premise is that he’s good at fighting but he’s also an asshole, and neither one of those things is interesting to me. Honestly the only part of this that isn’t extremely boring is Volumnia.

Hamlet – I hadn’t read this in a really long time and didn’t remember any of it, and I liked it more than I thought I would. It’s kind of gothic in a wonderful way, even though I know that’s not an appropriate term to use for something written at the time it was written. Honestly though, my liking for Hamlet as a character was severely diminished when he started making dirty comments to Ophelia, and she seemed way more sympathetic than I remember her being. The common theme in many of these tragedies seems to be a protagonist who is lost and overwhelmed and ends up lashing out because of it. The speeches in Hamlet are the best part for me by far, but yeah. As someone who likes language and anything dark, I like it.

Julius Caesar – This I quite liked; I think Brutus is a compelling character and it raises some interesting questions. It also contains the most passive-aggressive thing I’ve ever read. Although, during Act I when Cassius is trying to convince Brutus to kill Caesar, all I hear is “Brutus is just as nice as Caesar. Brutus is just as cute as Caesar, okay, people like Brutus just as much as they like Caesar.” Honestly I think Tina Fey purposely paraphrased Cassius’s lines when writing Mean Girls, which is pretty cool. I liked it when I auditioned for it and I’ve come to really love it, having been in it. I want to see more productions of this one.

King Lear – It’s grown on me over time, I guess. I do have some strong opinions on why Cordelia is actually kind of awful. I like Edmund and Regan and Cornwall, and Goneril have their moments, but none of these characters really get enough air time for me to like the play. What there is a lot of is Lear who is just depressing on multiple levels and his fool who annoys me with his overuse of the word “nuncle” even though I know it’s fairly normal for words in English to lose an /n/ at the beginning due to our articles like how “apron” used to be “napron” until people thought “a napron” was “an apron.” And there’s a lot of Edgar and Kent and Gloucester, none of whom I’m convinced to care about even though I have nothing against them. So overall I still think it is confusing and needlessly depressing, but I am slowly warming up to it. Like, I already know life is pointless, I don’t need something to tell me that like it’s some kind of revelation.

Macbeth – I really don’t understand Macbeth as a character. You think he’d be able to say “no” to murder seeing as he has no real interest in it. I don’t find it romantic at all that he does whatever crazy thing Lady Macbeth wants. I find it kind of disturbing, and certainly not something that reflects well on him. At first it seems like Lady Macbeth should just get rid of him and do everything herself if she’s going to be like that, and I don’t understand why she can’t bring herself to kill Duncan if she wants him dead so badly, and then she loses it halfway through the play and that’s always a let-down. Also isn’t this the one that has the line where it’s like “your father’s been murdered” -“oh, by whom?” and “what, you egg”? As funny as that is it doesn’t exactly speak volumes to Macbeth as having the greatest dialogue all the time. In conclusion, I want to like this play but I really don’t get what’s wrong with either Macbeth or Lady Macbeth and so I can’t really get into it.

Othello – This was always one of my favorites. I always thought Othello and Desdemona’s relationship was really beautiful and romantic in Act I but for some reason my liking of Othello never stops me from being intrigued by what Iago’s going to do next. There’s something appealing to me about being able to always say the right thing and having the self-confidence to make everyone do what you think they should do. That said, having now seen a Shakespeare villain who is manipulative (in an extremely different sort of way) but has motives and a personality, he seems really boring by comparison. I kind of get now how he’s just a plot device, and that does make Othello an even more sympathetic character. And it’s really heartbreaking how he thinks he’s not good enough for Desdemona and has to deal with his worst fears being confirmed after he’s had so much shit to deal with already. I think anyone would break.

Romeo and Juliet - I got tired of it a long time ago and honestly it’s not that good. It’s just kind of average. I get that people have to fall in love quickly in a play that can’t just go on for 10 hours but I still can’t bring myself to care about the characters. Juliet is mildly interesting but Romeo is just a boring person and I don’t care for him at all. Plus I feel like there’s a weird age difference between them considering she’s like 13 or 14 and he’s probably like 18. I’m probably just too ace for this play but I don’t get the appeal. (Update: I’ve now been in this play and I still don’t really get it. I don’t have anything against it but it doesn’t do too much for me either. I liked being in it a whole lot, but it wouldn’t be my top choice for something I want to watch).

Timon of Athens – I feel like there was the potential for this to be a good story about someone who kept giving people material things to get them to like him to the point of running himself into the ground (ha, literally) only to discover that doing that doesn’t actually make you real friends, but it never really came together for me. So good idea, not so sure about the execution, although my book thinks that Shakespeare only wrote part of it and Thomas Middleton wrote the rest so that probably has something to do with it.

Titus Andronicus – This has its moments but it’s not as violent as I thought it would be, which is not good for something that’s known for being violent. My first big problem with it is that Chiron and Demetrius get off way too easy. I was waiting the whole play for them to die horribly only to be let down. Being baked into pies hurts Tamora, not them, and I hate them so much that I’m out of fucks to give about her. My second big problem is that Titus is a selfish piece of shit. He fucking kills Lavinia because her condition is just too painful for him. He complains that he only has 5 children left but he kills two of them himself, on stage. I like Aaron in spite of myself, or at least I like a lot of his speeches; they’re a lot of fun to read. I was surprised that he wanted his child to live even if he couldn’t take care of it personally, but I have no idea how to feel about that because on the one hand I can see how it’s a redeeming quality, and so I like that there’s some effort to humanize him, but on the other hand I wish it was done a different way because that’s not something I have any basis to understand. All this said if I had the chance to see this performed, I admittedly would.

Troilus and Cressida – I’m confused because I spent most of this thinking it took place before the events of the Iliad when actually it was pretty much a different version of the same story, which is disappointing because as much as I love the Iliad, I already have the Iliad. As for Troilus and Cressida themselves, I was rolling my eyes when she thought she had to play hard to get, but then happy when he said that was never necessary and was just happy to be with her even though she thought she was embarrassing herself by expressing her feelings for him; he didn’t shame her for it and that perception was all in her head. But then she didn’t really have any choice but to go with Diomedes, so it’s not fair for Troilus to be mad at her. Plus they only just got together and they weren’t official or anything. He’s a bit of a dumbass, to be honest, even though he and Cressida have some sweet moments. I kind of like Thersites; he seems like my kind of guy. He hates lechery, doesn’t care for war, and thinks most of the Greek generals are full of themselves, which is pretty accurate. I like that he rejects the kind of masculinity most of them embrace where they just fight in order to get women. He thinks they’re the dumbest people ever for engaging in all of that, and frankly I think it’s pretty idiotic too. However, I don’t like that he makes fun of Achilles and Patroclus for being gay. There are already so many good reasons to make fun of Achilles.

ROMANCES

Winter’s Tale – I didn’t have any strong feelings about this until the end, but now I’m wondering where Hermione was for 16 years? I guess she stayed hidden somewhere, but how did she know when the right time to come back would be? Like that was some really good timing. I mean I guess I’m glad Leontes got his shit and part of his family together but to me that doesn’t really make for anything particularly memorable. And I don’t recall him actually apologizing to Hermione or Perdita, so he should really get on that.

Cymbeline – I wasn’t particularly expecting to like this, but I did. It had some of the same elements of the Winter’s Tale except it was way better and I liked the characters more – don’t get me wrong, it was still really…I’m not sure what the right word is, when all the male characters are assholes and they do awful things to Imogen and then she magically forgives them at the end, but at least I felt somewhat invested in her and her brothers, and there were some funny parts, but the part with the ghosts was really weird and I don’t know what to make of it. There are some weird parts in the Romances and I’m not feeling that.

Pericles – Not quite my cup of tea but I don’t hate it. I admit I don’t really like how it takes place over, what, decades? Plus I’ve never heard of this particular Pericles in my life. I totally thought it was going to be about the Athenian statesman. But I did like that it takes place partially in the Near/Middle East, even if it’s just the parts that were part of the Greek world (I’m guessing Hellenistic). But I liked the story well enough and I like that Pericles isn’t an asshole unlike Leontes or Cymbeline, and I like how Marina and Thaisa both were just dropped on a beach somewhere and by the time Pericles finds them they’re at the top of the societies they entered, and how the guy who was going to take Marina’s virginity was really embarrassed and gave her a bunch of money and was supportive when he found out she didn’t want to.

The Tempest – I actually enjoy this and I think it’s a fun play. Caliban is hilarious and I actually like that it turns out not to be a revenge story. Sometimes it’s nice to see someone be the bigger person and have everyone live, even if it’s not cathartic in the same way. There are some really cool interpretations out there but even on the surface I find it quite entertaining and I think there’s something to be said for something that makes me happy for no reason.

Bros Over Hoes (Luke Hemmings Smut)

Request: You and Luke are best friends and his gf is mean to you and he dumps her and you and him do the bang bang :D

Written by Carissa!! 

Imagine Masterlist

Originally posted by lashtuns


“Hey there,” your best friend Luke said as he walked into the kitchen of your other friend Ashton’s house. He set the two huge pizza boxes in his arms on the counter where you were leaning, and walked around for a hug. You gave your giant goofy noodle boy a good squeeze, until Julia walked in. “Don’t get that close, babe. She probably has cooties.” Ugh, Julia. This was the bitch who had been bullying you since primary school, tried to embarrass you every chance she got, and got your best friend and crush as a boyfriend.

Luke laughed at Julia’s comment. You tried not to punch her in the face. She looked stunning, as usual, with her perfect black waves of hair and piercing brown eyes but her black pleated skirt was a bit short for a casual afternoon hangout. “Modesty should be in your vocabulary, sweetheart. Especially if you want to be a teacher.” You said with an overly sweet smile. Her faced dropped, and so did Luke’s. He knew you didn’t like Julia, he just didn’t know why. His bright blue eyes met yours as he gave you a strange look, as if to say, ‘Why’d you say that?’ You didn’t want this now. Not one bit of this petty school girl shit Julia was always trying to pull. You were here to have a good time at Ash’s place, and by God you’d do it.

You guys played video games for a while; you, Luke, Calum, Livvy (Cal’s girlfriend), Michael, Ashton, and Julia. Eventually you went to grab some more food and drinks for the group, and you took Livvy to help you. You two were just about to exit the kitchen with some beer and chips when Julia walked in and pulled Livvy to the side. All of the sudden, you’d ‘forgotten something’ and with a faked face palm, decided to amble around in the fridge to see what Julia wanted with Livvy.

Julia pulled Livvy into a little corner on the kitchen. “Can you stand that bitch?” You heard her ask. Wow, that’s what she wanted? Really? “I-I like (y/n).” Livvy stammered. She was a shy, quiet girl who didn’t like trouble or drama. Why would Julia even ask her that. “Well,” Julia said, venom pouring out of her voice. You weren’t going to let her finish. You abruptly stood up, dumping the snack in your hand on the kitchen counter with a loud thump. “If you want to shit talk me, why don’t you say it to my face.”

“Oh, (y/n),” Julia said, her face lighting up as if she just noticed you. “How nice of you to join us.” Livvy turned around, looking frightened. “Livvy, you can go.” The small girl hurried out of the kitchen. Julia wasted no time on getting up in your face. “Who do you even think you are, bitch? Coming in and trying to steal my boyfriend. What even were you before Luke? Nothing. No one likes you. And if you think the fans like you, you’re wrong. Everyone hates you.” Oh here was the usual long winded hate train. This usually happened when Julia got you alone, and you just rolled your eyes at her.

“You’re right, Julia. I wasn’t anything before Luke, but he wasn’t anything before me, either.” Julia looked taken aback, and actually moved away from you a few steps. “Oh what, don’t act like you didn’t know that.” You spat, knowing you were about to burn this bitch to the ground. “Oh,” you said as innocently as possible. “You didn’t know that. Well, let’s see,” you reached a small finger up to tap you chin. You were shocked that Julia could keep her mouth shut for so long. “Luke and I share the same birthday. My hospital bed was next to his. Our dads have know each other since they were five. I first shared a bed with Luke when I was three days old. That’s more than you can say, isn’t it?” Julia was turning an eggplant shade of purple, a bug eyed expression of pure rage on her face. “I was there for the boys first show. I was in the audience. And you were there for what? The boys-” You broke off, a bitter grin on you face. You lowered your voice.

“Oh that’s right. Luke hasn’t taken you to a show yet. And you know why-” You words were cut off by a ring covered fist driving into your cheek. You tumbled to the floor with a crash, your head banging on the cool tiles. You heard feet moving towards your location. “What was that?”

“Julia? What happened?”

“Oh my god, you just punched her.” Your head was pounding too much to hear much after that, so you just laid on your back and fought off the tears that were threatening to fall down. After a bit, you felt a warm hand slip under your head, and you turned your head. A pair of familiar blue eyes met yours. Luke. He lightly placed a finger on the bruise already forming on your skin. “I’ve got to take her home, guys.” He whispered. “Oh my god, she’s such a drama queen. She’ll be fine. Just get her up.”

“What the hell, Julia?” You heard Livvy yell. And Livvy never yells, ever. Luke scooped you off the floor into his warm arms. You’d actually imagined a few scenarios that Luke might be picking you up bridal style, but being punched in the face by a bitchy girlfriend was never one of them. Luke got you situated in his car, then you headed off to his house. About halfway through the ride, your nose started bleeding and you had to pull over so you could get some covering on it. “Sorry about this, (y/n),” Luke said, keeping one hand on the wheel, placing the other on your thigh and shaking it encouragingly. He shook his head with aggravation, his jawline tightening as he pulled up to his house. “I always pick the worst of them. Is that the first time she it you?”

“Yep.” Once inside, Luke cleared the little island in the middle of his kitchen and started getting medical supplies out. “Sit.” He patted the granite countertop, his ever present pinky ring causing a light echo to resonate around the room. “Luke,” You were hesitant to follow his orders. “What are you doing?”

“Well, usually my mom is better at this stuff, but I’m going to fix you up.”

“Dr. Fluke to the rescue?”

“Yeah,” he laughed. “Dr. Fluke to the rescue.” You popped up on the counter and Luke finally found whatever supplies he was looking for. “Alrighty then,” He walked over and stood in between your legs in front of you, most likely just as aware of the awkward moment as you were. “Let’s get you fixed up.” A soft hand reached out and tilted your head to the side. “You’re bleeding.” His voice dropped to a whisper. “Yeah,” you sighed. “One of Julia’s rings scratched me.”

“Dammit.”

You fiddled with your hands as Luke cleaned the blood off your skin. “This is going to hurt a bit.” Something was dabbed on your skin and you flinched. “Are you okay?” Luke sounded panicked. Your heart sped up at the concern in his voice. “I-I’m fine.” Luke kept on doing whatever he needed to until he placed a large bandage on your scratch. “All done,” he said, tapping the counter behind you. “Now, face wounds bleed pretty bad sometimes so if it starts bleeding again, I’m taking you to the hospital, (y/n).” You smiled at him. “Why are you being so protective?”

“Because I was blind and now you’re hurt. I feel really shitty.” He looked down at the floor. You leaned forward. “Hey, don’t feel bad. I’m a big girl. I’ll be fine.” Your mouth felt weird as your vowels moved around in your mouth. You sat up and ran your fingers along the cloth on your cheek. Luke gave you a one dimpled smirk, leaving you hot and bothered. “What?” He asked.

“Talking feels weird with this thing on.” Luke’s hand cupped your good cheek and turned your head so he could look at the wound. “You still look stunning.” You were taken aback. “What?”

“I said you still look stunning.” Luke let out a shaky breath. “The truth is, I like you, (y/n), I like you a lot. And I know that you don’t like me back but-”

“Luke, just stop. I like you, too.”

“Oh my god.” You leaned forward and pressed your forehead to his. For a few precious moments, you two just shared air. Two heart beating under one breath. He liked you back. Wow. That is great news. “Luke I-” You tried to say something, but were cut off by his lips on yours. There are sparks, fireworks, and atomic bombs when people kiss, and whatever this kiss was, it was above them all. Your wrapped you legs around Luke, pulling him towards you and deepening the kiss, his lip ring making everything feel more wonderfully complicated. You tangled your hands in his hair, and his giant hands roamed all around, across your stomach and down your thighs. They left burning paths, setting your body on edge. He picked you up and set you down on his couch a few yards away. Your Cobain shirt came off (oh my god, how ironic), and his did, too, revealing a muscled chest and perfectly tan skin. “Good thing my parents are out of town,” He murmured, dragging his lips down the side of your neck. They passed a spot on your collar bone and you sucked in a breath. “Babe,” he said, making sure to suck on the dip in your collar bone. “Is this a sweet spot, (y/n)?”

“Yeah.” Your voice came out as a high pitched moan. Luke reached behind you and fiddled with your bra strap. He finally got it loose. He lips moved from your neck to your nipple, only after he’d given you a very prominent hickey. He bit down a bit on your nipple, and your body went crazy, trying to shift out of the way of his mouth. “Oh no,” he said, his voice at the rumbling growl which turned you on even more. We’ve only just begun. He slipped off his skinny jeans and boxers, and you slipped off your shorts, grabbing the ‘JICC’ (just in case condom) you always kept in your back pocket. “Here.” you handed it to Luke. He slipped it on his cock, pulled you close, and paused and your entrance. “Do you trust me?”

“Yes.”

He slid inside and you gasped. He was so big. You could feel your walls trying to hold him as he slid in and out. It felt so good. Each thrust brought you closer and closer to a climax. Your moans started getting louder. “Fuck,” Luke said, his voice strained. “You’re so tight. So damn tight.” He was fucking you into the couch and soon you couldn’t take it anymore. “Luke,” you stammered out between thrusts. “I can’t-”

“Let go, baby girl.” The 'baby girl’ really set you off. Your eyes screwed shut and your back arched as you climax, your hips bucking around Luke. You let out and loud moan and soon Luke came, too. You rode out your orgasm and eventually Luke fell on top of you, your sweaty bodies tumbling together. Luke kissed your nose and smiled at you, still panting. “I love you.” You smile back. “I love you, too.” He paused a moment.

“Round two in the shower?”

“I don’t see a problem with that.”

2

—Neymar Imagine: Good Intentions—

“Calm down!” my friend yelled over the phone.

“I can’t Julia! I don’t know what’s going on?” I replied, scrolling frantically through my boyfriend’s Instagram for evidence to confirm his infidelity.

“Exactly,” she bit out. “You don’t know what’s going on. So before you start assuming things why don’t you just ask him about it?”

I laughed. “Ask him?” I asked rhetorically. “I can’t just ask him!”

There was a long pause over the phone and before I went to speak to break the silence, Julia cut me off. “Why can’t you talk to him about this y/n? You sound ridiculous. I mean, isn’t that what couples do in relationships? Talk about things?”

“But this is me accusing him of being unfaithful,” I replied. “I don’t know how he’d respond to that. There has to be an easier way to figure this out.”

“Easy… as in talking to him,” she insinuated.

I rolled my eyes aggressively. “Sometimes talking about things isn’t the easiest way Julia.”

“What did he even do?” she asked, ignoring my response.

“He’s been hanging out with that Sportscaster a lot lately,” I replied. “I feel like every time I talk to him, he’s with her and when he’s not hanging out with her, he’s being interviewed by her. It doesn’t help that he hasn’t been home much, and when he is, he’s quiet. It’s like he doesn’t seem romantically interested in me anymore, and I can’t help but wonder if she’s the reason for it all.”

I heard her let out a breath of frustration on the other end of the phone. “I think you’re overthinking the situation.”

“So you expect me to believe his change in behavior is merely a coincidence?”

“They were friends growing up y/n. Neymar has been in the spotlight a lot lately with winning gold at the Olympics and playing for the World Cup qualifiers! She just so happens to be covering it because she’s a Sportscaster, a very successful Sportscaster. They cross paths professionally and keep in touch personally. Yes, you’re overthinking it,” she said, trying to calm me.

“I don’t know Julia. I don’t think…”

The door slamming cut me off mid-sentence. “I think he’s here. Text you later.”

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Lovesong.

I could feel his breath on my neck as he held me close, protectively like he feared at any moment I could slip out of his arms.

I wasn’t going anywhere…

My head rested on his shoulder, as always enjoying the slight height differential between the two of us. I felt safe in his arms. I felt comforted. I felt like I was where I belonged.

His fingers danced slowly over my skin as if they were hitting the keys of a piano attuned to the soft song playing in our background. It felt just like that, background noise, as I found myself entranced instead by the sound of his breath escaping his body. The melody of human movement seemed to be even more intriguing to me at the moment.

This was a feeling I had never felt before though oddly I had been in this position. My feet moved along the floor, making sure my heels avoided the long train of my gown as it swept under me a few times. I knew all eyes were on us and some were probably filled to the brim with tears. I knew my mother’s were as she watched her youngest daughter dance along with her now husband.

Husband.

It felt weird to utter that label and now associate it with Rafinha but it felt…refreshing. It felt refreshing to now be attached to a new start and a new relationship that was officially cemented by the exchanging of rings. Some would argue that we moved too fast considering we had only been together for less than a year but with Rafa, for me time didn’t exist. Every day felt like a lifetime.

A pleasant lifetime.

It was a lifetime that brought change, mostly change to me and who I was as a person. I grew from being that softspoken girl trapped within her own mind to one who now had no fears on voicing her opinion. And I had that stain of a previous marriage on my resume but that ugly mark was ignored by Rafinha as he took me into his life as if I was the most beautiful woman he had ever laid eyes on.

It was a powerful love marked by the desire to do any and everything for one another. I had never felt that before. Sure, I had been embraced into a marriage when I was only 18, back then thinking that my childhood sweetheart was the love of my life and we would share memories together forever but that was before I realized that I hadn’t married the one.

I had married someone I thought would protect me for life, love me for life but that was the tricky part about love. One day it could be there and the next day it could vanish as if it never existed. I grew numb after that and found myself alone at the age of 20.

No one wanted to be alone at 20.

It was a dark period for me. I separated myself from my family, my friends, my life. I wandered trying to find me and who I was without my partner who I realized had begun to define me. It seemed nothing could drag me out of the depression I was faced with until I met Rafinha.

He noticed my sadness, noticed my loneliness but unlike others he didn’t allow me to continue to wallow in my own misery. He worked to uplift me and in that time I found myself falling in love. I learned then the difference in falling in love and being in love.

I was in love now.

The soft touch of his hand to the nape of my neck as he brushed my hair away to place a gentle kiss to my skin made me shiver. With the slow melodic music playing alongside us, it felt like every touch of his painted a lyric to my skin.

Lyrics full of love, life, pleasure, gaiety.

We hadn’t spoken since being led out to our first dance but we didn’t need to speak. Our eyes told a story of their own. I could see a happy glint in his eyes when he looked at me like I was some sort of angel put on this Earth to bless his life.

I thought it was the other way around.

My mind went back to the day he led me to the empty Camp Nou, a boyish grin tugging his lips before he tried to hide it between his teeth. I was led to the middle of the pitch, unsure of what exactly Rafinha was planning in his head but when did I ever know what he was planning? He took my hand between his and even now, I could practically remember every word he spoke starting with:

Having you in my life has been the best surprise of my years by far. I sometimes wonder how I got so lucky to be the man that got to see you blossom into what you are now. I knew the very first day I saw you that I wanted you in my life in some way. Even in my fear that you would push me away, I kept trying. I couldn’t just let you slip away and I am so glad I didn’t.

I did push him away. I could remember the times where his calls to my phone would go unanswered on the nights I preferred to just cry myself to sleep alone. He would just send me another call and a message. He was never too afraid to show how forward he was. He didn’t shy away from challenging me in my ability to run away from him. It seemed to work out well for him and for me too.

I thought back to the moment he dropped down to one knee, the moment I could feel my heartbeat quicken to speeds I wasn’t even sure were healthy. I would have nearly fainted if I hadn’t willed myself to stay focused on the sweet words flowing out of his lips followed by, “Will you marry me?”

The words came out of his lips like he was singing my favorite song, the part of my favorite song that I had to keep rewinding and replaying just to make sure I had digested the lyrics correctly. I still think I was replaying his song in my mind months later.

And now here we were, at our wedding sharing our first dance as Mr. and Mrs. surrounded by those that loved us.

“You look like an angel tonight,” he whispered into my ear. It was one of the many compliments he had whispered to me today but the best one had to have been the one he didn’t verbally express, when he was looking at me walk down the aisle and a hint of a tear formed in the corner of his eye.

That was all I needed to see to know that I looked like a woman who was filled with joy, happiness and love.

“Thank you,” I whispered back, still slow dancing in his arms.

I removed my head from his chest to look up towards him and he looked down to me, taking the time to take my available lips onto his for a moment. The electricity that flooded my body with his kiss was warm. It was fulfilling. I wished I could bottle all of these feelings in a container to be enjoyed later.

By now, others were filing onto the dance floor area to share a dance with their significant others as well. I turned my head to see Thiago and Julia sharing a dance, Thiago giving me a playful and encouraging wink. I was reminded of a conversation we shared a few nights ago where I expressed my fear of sharing this first dance, reminding him of my clumsiness. He assured me it would be fine and if anything, Rafinha would guide me through it. He was right.

I could see Antonella and Leo enveloped in each other’s eyes. I was reminded of her words of her advice given on how to handle being married to a footballer. We spent all night talking to each other, me downing wine and her downing various sweets to satisfy her pregnancy cravings. I knew I would remember her advice forever.

I then looked up at Rafinha who was too busy staring down at me to notice anyone else around us. I broke into a smile which caused him confusion. “What?”

“Nothing, nothing. I just…I always love when you look at me like that.”

“Like what?” he challenged.

“Like I’m the only person in the room.”

“That’s because it feels like you are, like it’s just me and you in this room.” He raised his hand to tuck a strand of curls behind my ear.

I can feel home in my soul again

Been numb for some years now

Starting to feel

Like I’m not alone again.

gif credit to brazilaf

ok listen up friends it is story time

before i begin i would like to state that this 100% percent true. the sequence of events might be slightly off, because i was out of it for most of this, but otherwise completely true. Ask wolfstarforever, poker-cards, and b-urnie: they were there and are mentioned by name in this post.

so some of you may know that i am a huge latin nerd. if not, you can check out /classics-tag and be easily convinced of this fact. Us latin nerds are actually highly organized: we have this organization called the Junior Classical League (JCL). And each year the JCL has a national convention in which members from across the US and a few Canadian provinces come together for a week in the summer. This past week was my fifth and last convention as JCLer, because next year I will be in the senior classical league. and i had a lot of fun. there are plenty of stories i could tell about the week itself that would be funny and interesting but instead i am going to focus on our journey home, because it ended up WAY more interesting than any of us had bargained for.

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