sometimes i cry because of people

anonymous asked:

To the anon complaining about that sidlink picture being about rape, you realize Link and Sidon are FICTIONAL CHARACTERS right?

http://cuteouji.tumblr.com/post/160883413922/bite-marks-because-sometimes-it-important-to-mark

OH SURE SIDON IS TOTALY DO IT WITHOUT LINK’S CONSENT!! OMG LOOK AT HOW LINK IS CRYING :cccc


As I said. I don’t support rape. The bite thing is just a kink that a lot o people (me too) have!! We are in 2017, come on!

Things my dentist has actually said to me:

“Well, either the x-rays lied to me or you are spontaneously creating teeth. I’m going with the second one because it’s way cooler.”

“When was the last time you flossed? Your gums aren’t bleeding which means I’m either not doing this hard enough or you actually floss your teeth regularly”

“You don’t need to do a fluoride treatment I just want to go check my facebook for a second and this is the best excuse I can come up with. Don’t worry your insurance will cover it.”

“Take a whole handful of toothbrushes, I can’t order new ones in less ugly colors until these ones are gone.”

“Remember not to eat or drink anything for a half hour…or actually you know forget that go eat lemons and drink coffee right now. I make money based on peoples bad decisions, you should probably stop brushing your teeth too.”

“I became a dentist because I like making children cry and they don’t let you do that as a regular doctor.”

The cameras make a habit of getting a LIL TOO CLOSE to Viktor and Yuuri because the mics sometimes pick up what they say to each other before skating or in the Kiss & Cry, and audiences eat that shit up. There are people who watch ISU events like it’s the Viktor&Yuuri Show, and the sports channels know it

TUNE IN FOR THE NIKIFOROV-KATSUKI VARIETY HOUR, the advertisements practically blare.

Viktor can often be heard composing what sounds like literal on-the-spot poetry. (”You are my sun and stars and I will love you until I’m in the ground–”) Much of this is to calm Yuuri down before he skates. Most viewers assume that he writes this shit down somewhere but people who know Viktor understand it to be just the shit that literally is always coming out of Viktor’s mouth.

“Oh,” Yuuri says while they’re waiting for Viktor’s scores one time. He hasn’t put his glasses back on yet and is kind of just staring, unfocused, into the nebulous distance. “I forgot to call Minako and wish her a happy birthday.”

(“YEAH YOU DID,” Minako growls at the television back in Hasetsu. Hiroko pats her back. She just turned fifty. She’s sensitive.)

“Well, you’re dead now,” Viktor says, picking fuzz off his costume. “It was nice knowing you. I’ll never forget you.”

“Will you move on from me?” Yuuri asks. All of this is completely deadpan as they squint at the scoreboard. Yakov is on Viktor’s other side, rolling his eyes.

“No. I’ll roam the halls of our empty home, wailing for my lost love. When I die, I’ll continue to haunt the place where I was once happy. They will call me the Silver Spectre. Once or twice a year, Americans will come and try to film me. I’ll scream into their camera equipment and carve the words triple axel into the hardwood.”

“Please not the hardwood, Vitya.”

They find out that most ISU programming isn’t actually put on a delay during the 2018 Worlds, when Viktor and Yuuri are congratulating each other on winning gold and silver and the cameras pick up Viktor saying, “When we get home, I’m going to bend you over the table and–”

“LOVING WORDS FROM VIKTOR NIKIFOROV-KATSUKI TO HIS HUSBAND,” screams the commentator, whose producer is currently bellowing abort abort into his left ear. “LET’S GO TO PAULA WHO’S TALKING TO BRONZE MEDALIST YURI PLIS–OKAY, NEVER MIND. HAHA, TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES! WE’RE CUTTING TO COMMERCIAL.”

‘Technical difficulties’ is Yuri punting a tiger plush so hard towards Viktor that it knocks him backwards and into the backdrop for the Kiss & Cry.

“This used to be an ELEGANT SPORT,” Yakov growls. He looks to Lilia, whose expression is suspiciously toothy. “Are you laughing at this, Lilya?”

“How dare you accuse me of such a thing,” Lilia replies.

“Sometimes I’d start crying in class for no reason. Then when I got home from school, I’d just go straight to my room. I couldn’t even talk to my mom about it because I’d just start crying. People would tell me: ‘Just get up, exercise, and take a walk.’ But none of that helped. Things got so bad that even the school was watching me. I started bawling during a chemistry exam and I ended up in the school psychologist office. I remember thinking: ‘I don’t care if I ever see another chemistry exam again. Or my friends. Or my mom.’ And I started to get this feeling that I was definitely going to do it. I was going to lock myself in my room that night and take a bunch of pills. The only thing that stopped me was imagining my mom finding my body. That was three years ago. That time seems so far away now. I found a great therapist. I learned so much about myself. There’s so much that I want to do now. I want to travel. I want to get married. I want to have kids. There are so many poems that I haven’t written and songs I haven’t heard. So it’s terrifying for me to think that I came so close. My problems were small back then. They were teenage problems. But I came one step away from not being. And I had made the decision to take that step. I’m afraid that I can go back to that place again. And next time, my problems will probably not be so small.”

(Bogotá, Colombia)

So this is a totally useless rant, but as a skinny girl, I’m getting extra, extra tired of fat-shaming.

I work for a corsetier at a Renaissance Faire. We sell corsets. Not flimsy bullshit costume corsets; like real, durable, waist-training corsets. Today a woman came in with her boyfriend, so I helped her pick out a corset and try it on. While her boyfriend—who was decidedly enthused about the whole corset thing—sat watching me lace her in, he told me, grinning, “Of all the good jobs at the Renaissance Faire, I think you have the best.”

I shrugged in agreement. “I touch butts and reach down cleavage all day; I mean…” Because we like to be a bit rakish at the Faire, and, y’know, it’s true. Tying people into corsets pretty much invariably requires getting handsy.

The couple laughed at that, and the boyfriend said, “That’s the job I would want!” But then he chuckled again and said, offhand, “Or maybe not; while we were looking at the racks, there were some pretty big sizes on there!”

Our sizes are all done in inches, and the biggest we make is a 46. And you’d better believe our large sizes sell. For a second I wasn’t sure what to say to the guy’s comment, but I answered him casually. “We get a lot of beautiful big ladies in here.” Because we do. “We make corsets for real women, not Barbie dolls,” I added. Wasn’t trying to be smart, just kind of tossed it out there because that’s the line we like to use when people ask about larger sizes, and because, again, we do.

The boyfriend went quiet at that; I didn’t think anything of it, I just kept on lacing. A moment later, he said, a little awkwardly (but sincerely enough), “Didn’t mean to be offensive.”

I quickly smiled and brushed it off, said he wasn’t, said I was just saying. (Don’t want to make the customers uncomfortable, you know?) And that was the end of it. His comment had rubbed me the wrong way, but it wasn’t a big deal. Now, I wear a 20-inch corset. I’m a few cup sizes short of being one of the Barbie dolls. Like his girlfriend, I’m one of the “hot chicks”; he doesn’t have to worry about offending me by implying that I wouldn’t be fun to poke and pull at.

Honestly though, of all the people I fit sexy technically-undergarments to in a day, fat girls are maybe my favorite people to lace up. Because they are just so damn happy that we have stuff that fits them. They are so damn happy that the corsets we make in their sizes are all the same pretty, shiny colors and cool flower/dragon/skull/etc. prints that the smaller corsets are, not ugly beige and boring “granny” colors. They are so goddamn happy that at least one (of several on the grounds) corset shop carries things that they can wear, that they actually want to wear, and that they look fucking awesome in. This is only my second season working, and we’ve fit 60+ inch waists and double-K busts. The only people we’ve ever had to tell sorry, we don’t have anything that fits them, are twelve-year-old kids.

It’s half-wonderful, half-heartbreaking how excited those women get. Women who say with sad smiles, when we ask if they want to get fitted, “Oh, no, you don’t have anything that fits me,” and then are stunned when we’re 300% confident that yes we do, and we have options. Women who can’t stop smiling and looking at themselves in the mirror after we’ve got them laced in.

I had a lady last week whose waist I measured (cinching the tape tight, as per procedure) at 41 inches—honestly not all that big. So she picked out a 41-inch corset to try on. I could tell halfway through getting her laced that it was going to be a bit big for her, so I mentioned it and said she might do better to try a smaller size. She started crying on the spot. She was so overwhelmed; she couldn’t believe someone had just told her that a 41 was too big. She told me about how hard clothes shopping was for her, how her mother would tell her she needed an XXXL instead of an XXL, how she had recently lost weight but still couldn’t wear certain colors because they didn’t fit or she wasn’t confident enough.

She did end up getting her corset, and after I checked her out she asked if she could give me a hug, so we ended up standing there hugging each other for a minute. While we did, I told her, “Do not ever let anyone tell you any bullshit. You are gorgeous.” She said, “I have a new boyfriend and he keeps telling me that.” I told her he was right, and to just keep telling herself she’s gorgeous; it was okay if she didn’t always believe it, but to keep telling herself anyway. (That’s how I talked myself through shit when I had bad anxiety.)

We all know fat-shaming is bad. The stupidity, fatphobia, and misogyny of it has pissed me off since I first became aware of it. But working with clothing, especially as figure-hugging and precise as corsets, has given me a new perspective on it—how much it affects people and just how shitty it is. Like, what does it say that I had a grown, only average-big woman crying into my shoulder because she was so overjoyed not to be the uppermost extremity of what a manufacturer can clothe?

My job rocks and it’s really rewarding, but sometimes it highlights some of the ugliest shit about society. I’m so glad I work at a shop that’s not bullshit about body types and operates with more people in mind than just scrawny white chicks like me. The fat women I work with are a ton of fun to lace up, and they’re so much more than their size—they’re cool, they’re smart, they’re funny, they’re sweet, they’re great to talk to, and yes, they’re hot. I’m so damn done with them getting short-changed and shamed by petty fucks who refuse to make them nice clothes, who refuse to even try to work for them, who refuse to consider them pretty. This whole rant was useless and won’t get read, but I had to vent because it’s been driving me nuts.

So actually, screw you, random dude. Fat girls are the highlight of my job.

Dear whoever is reading this,
I know things are hard right now and you’re going through so much and I know you might think that there’s no way around this but things are going to get better, you’ve probably heard this about a thousand times and you’re sick of it but life can’t be like this forever. One day, all your problems are going to fade away, all these things that you worry about now aren’t going to mean anything as time passes. You will get better and I’m not saying that you won’t have to face more problems later on, because you probably will, but there will always be a solution. Please don’t hurt yourself and please don’t kill yourself, someone loves you more than you think, even if you don’t know it. Focus on the people who listen to you, not on those who hurt you, surround yourself by positivity and don’t give up, keep standing tall and just know that sometimes it’s ok to fall apart, it’s okay to cry and let everything out, you’re only human and breaking down doesn’t make you weak and sometimes we just need to remind ourselves of that. I hope that a few years later, you’ll wake up with a smile on your face and you’ve forgotten about everything that has been holding you back, that you’ll be able to smile a real smile again and know that everything is okay again and I hope that’ll you’ll feel happy again. Please don’t give up, please don’t lose hope.

Aries: I envy you. I envy your courage, your stupidity and your childishness. Maybe you’re asking “Why?” Well, wouldn’t it be beautiful if we were all children at heart, like you? Like seeing things so horrible yet still making corny jokes? Like telling your feelings, like running until your feet hurt? Like purity, like innocence mixed with knowledge? You have experienced the world, you have experienced life. And yet, you still stand here. Brave and tall. As if to say “I am not afraid of life. I am not afraid to live.”

Taurus: I will always associate you with flowers and colours. With lilies and roses and blood oranges. I will always associate you with fruit and red-green-yellow. We will speak in colours, talk in words others won’t understand. With red-grey sand and blue-green eyes. An encouraging nod, a hug with clasping hands. Words left unspoken simply ‘cause they were never meant to be said, they were meant to be. They were meant to be. Plucking petals like a grade schooler playing games about love. Holding a magnifying glass over your head, and I could not find a flaw. I just saw you. I saw you.

Gemini: While you drink in the melodies of everyone’s laughter. The ghosts find a new home inside your body. A facade of performance, masking out true emotions. While the hallways turn vacant and your ghosts shut the doors. The voices leave the room empty, the emptiness in your chest weighing like a brick worth thousands of golden bricks. I cannot put a price on your heart, I don’t know its colours. I don’t know its voice. Or the three albums you have on repeat over the summer, or the songs you dance to at night. Simply because you are you, unique, mysterious and beautiful.

Cancer: You are a puzzle and I am not your missing peace, I don’t own it. But you do. You make up your own being. Maybe you left it in your back pocket, next to the shattered dreams or under the pillars you build when you were eight years old. The ones you made to put your broken home on, searching for stability in broken mirrors. I will linger in my map of you and I swear that even when I get back it leads back to you. It always leads back to you. To that little house with orange paint on the walls from ten years ago. With the nicotine sticking to a once white ceiling and some kind of animals running around. The dusty photographs will still stand on the desk. You will still sit on that one spot, with teary eyes and crossed legs. And you will still be beautiful.

Leo: I could never describe your beauty. Your beauty cannot be multiplied, it can only be remembered, treasured, envied, appreciated or regretted. And by remembered I mean that when you feel like you are just another extra in someone’s life that they will mention you to their parents during dinner. They will talk about your shining personality and sparkling eyes. By treasured I am talking about that “the one” experience which you deserve. A treasure filled with all things unique and irreplaceable. One that’s filled with happiness. By envied I am talking about the eyes you do not see, or do not wish to see. Or don’t notice. You stand out in a crowd, especially when you don’t think you are. By appreciated I am talking about the ones who see your true you, your tangled hair and cracked lips. The ones who still stay even through the bad times. By regretted I am talking about the people who did not see your beauty until you blossomed. I understand why you find cocoons beautiful now, and how you like caterpillars just as much as butterflies.

Virgo: Snow litters on untouched skin. Sun rains through the cracks of the darkness even where you hide. I could hear you talking every day. Forever. With delicate fingers and blushed cheeks. Your hair untamed and your fingers bruised to the bone. Delicately logical. The edges of the leafs of oak trees remind me of your way of thinking. The overhang reminds me of your mind. Which casts shadows over the villagers in the houses you build where colourless souls reside. You are so often in debate with your own head, at war with your own body. Never at peace, always restless. Always asking, “but why?” I don’t know. You like it, don’t you? Parading around in your own world? Sweet little soul in a world full of pain.

Libra: The bell of the church echoed through your head a little longer than it should’ve. It never was nice. We never played nice. We talked until our lips were dry and I stayed home when you were out cold. But memories don’t matter anymore do they darling? In this orchestra of harmonious noises where you are the leader of everything nothing can hurt you. I don’t know, I don’t know. And goddamnit I know you will try to push everything on yourself again. You always do. That’s just how you work. Why don’t you warm your hands on your own body for once? You don’t need another person to feel like you’re loved, you only need one. One whole, full, true person.

Scorpio: Everything seems darker these days. Charcoal coloured clouds are a daily thing. And your arms are always covered up along with your legs. Even in the summer the nights don’t seem as enchanting. Not when small bruises shaped like the bumps of your knuckles litter on your thighs. Self destructive lullabies, “I just need a friend, for once in my life.” A desire for someone to stay ripped from your lips. So I stayed by your side wondering, if you wanted me to stay or needed me to stay. Of course I could say you remind me of scarlet blood and bathroom tiles. But you also remind of the river I used to play in when I was nine. You also remind me of the necklace I got when my grandmother passed away. You remind me of memories, the good, the bad, the in-between. You remind me of life. Please keep on living.

Sagittarius: The reason that I didn’t cry when you left was because crying means letting go, or so you said. And I don’t want to let you go. I want you to be a part of me, forever. But I can’t do that, you would rot in the hell hole that is my mind. I can’t put you through more cruelty. I hate how I am the reason you cry on bad nights, do you still wonder if I miss you? I do. I do. I do. Regret was stronger than appreciation. But you’re so fucking strong. Your eyes still shine even when you’re sad. You think no one likes you yet you know that’s not true. You’re the reason I am alive. You let me experience pain, beauty, emotion. You let me live. You’re so much more than enough, sometimes I can’t even handle who you are. You are dazzling. But you could never control your heart, it always wandered over the streets of other people’s bodies.

Capricorn: When the sun sets over mountains and the houses made of glass shatter I will still see your name in the sky in neon lights. The little bugs in our home always wanted to be friends with you. They always say on the tip of your nose with gentle smiles. I never envied you, I wish I treasured you. You are so simplistic and nice. Nice. Too underrated for your own good, no? Aren’t we all. Your hands will still be remembered by those you touched. You always leave some kind of mark that they don’t want to wash off. You have that affect on people. You make them drown their thoughts and hold their breath when you walk into a room. You are an old soul, you know. Why? You just do. Because you’re you. And nothing can change that or the late nights, the slowness or the fastness in your walk doesn’t matter for the right people. They will walk for you until they have blathers on their toes. If they don’t you know what to do.

Aquarius: Swirls of icy wind are always your accomplice. Your cold, and beautiful; like snow. The wires always stick to your senses, they get stuck in between your backbone. They twist around your spine and plug into the back of your brain. You let other people control you like you’re a mindless puppet. I think the wires got the best of you. Whenever you speak your mind it says something beautiful and unique. You are original, not ordinary. I am sorry they teach you that being unique is bad and that you have to fit into this ‘ordinary’ world as an ‘ordinary’ person. Nothing is ordinary about you, not even your name. Your name says who you are as a person, if someone asks me to define you I will simply say your name, the definition of your personality is your name. Because your name is unique and so is your personality. Don’t let other people control you.

Pisces: The imaginary butterflies with the raven black wings told me about you. They tell me that your head is in a universe they have never seen, with all things beautiful and all things bad. They see you crying with your knees tugged up sometimes, hands in your hair as you hide beneath sheets of darkness. You write poetry with the blood in the sink and make galaxies with the stars you find inside other people their eyes. A gentle smile always embraces your lips, “So happy, yet so sad” they say. A mask is something you believe is beautiful, but I believe you are beautiful. The real you. Not the you who cautiously walks over this realm of sadness. Your moonlit hair is so silky, your sunlit eyes are so sad. Chin up little soldier.

—  Letters to the zodiac signs
She doesn’t like to be called babe because it’s sort of a lazy way of saying baby, she loved it when I called her by nicknames, babygirl, princess, tiger (because she wants to reincarnate into a tiger if she one day dies) beautiful, etc, she doesn’t like when others call her by her name, because she prefers “soph” but she loved it when I called her by her name and she sat there smiling at me for ages. Her favourite drinks are iced coffee, those frappe things from McDonald’s and rubicon (the mango one though) she loved coffee and I’ll never understand why. Shes insecure of her face and when You look at her too long she’ll cover it, she’s insecure of her body, though it’s perfect just the way it is to me, she’s insecure of her smile but I find it beautiful. No matter how many times I called her beautiful she didn’t once believe it because she believes she isn’t. No matter how many times I tried to prove to her she was beautiful she didn’t believe it. She’s insecure, she’s scared of being hurt, she’s scared of wasting time, she’s scared of putting her all into somebody to be left alone, her guard was up, even after I showed her the craziest amounts of love, because she’s afraid of letting people in and it’ll take her ages for her to be able to trust you and open up, the way she is stubborn drives me crazy because I want her to tell me what’s wrong but she won’t. She’s spend all night crying over me but has been happy for me the next day because whose wants to see a smile on my face, she will be emotional, she’ll cry, she’ll cry and lot, she won’t tell me she’s crying though because she’s scared to bring attention to herself. She gets jealous but only because she doesn’t want to see me with anybody else. She has days where all she wants to do is be alone and cry, there’s days she’ll have no motivation but all you need to do is try to be there for her regardless of how much she acts as though she doesn’t care because deep down she does and her pain is too much to explain so she’ll keep it in rather than tell me what’s wrong. She thinks she’s stupid and not intelligent (which I think and believe she is) and regardless of what i tell her she will never believe it, she always believes she isn’t enough but she is more than enough, I look at her and see my future, I look at her and it will physically hurts me because i know that she is worth much more yet she sticks around just for me, I think back to all the times I’ve hurt her and made her cry because of stupid arguments, I’ll look at her and my eyes will light up from the way her smile forms and the way her pupils dilate, the way she turns her head to the side so I won’t see her smiling or laughing. she never wants to see me upset, she may never say much but she knows, she wants to say things but her shyness takes over, she wants to be here for me but she will have no idea what to say, she will try her damn right hardest to be there for me and even though i don’t realise how much effort she puts in she will still carry on doing so. Even though I don’t thank her enough for making you happy she will still carry on doing so because she wants me to be happy. She never really speaks about what’s on her mind until i physically beg her to, she hates to talk of her past and her future and if I’m lucky she’ll tell me a story or two about her past, I need to pay attention because she hates to repeat herself, i need to reply to her like I’m interested or she’ll think i don’t care. She hates to talk of her future because it’s “depressing” because she doesn’t believe in herself but now is the part where i should interfere and motivate her to believe that everything she wants will be hers as long as she tries. She hates it when i give her “positivity rants” on the phone because it makes her overthink. She hates feeling like I’m not paying attention to her. She hates when I don’t realise everything you do for her. She hates feeling depressed and alone so i much bring as much happiness to her as possible, she hates knowing that I’m not okay. she loves sci-fi movies and that’s another thing I’ll never understand why she loves but when we’re married I’ll sit with her through 3 hour sci-fi movies because it’ll put a smile on her face and I’d do anything for that, She loves to mess and play with her hair, she is so downright passionate about photography and she loves relating to somebody, she loves when I know things about her, she loves having deep meaningful conversations, she sometimes stays up until stupid o clock to check up on me and to see if I’m okay or just to speak to me because she craves me and the feelings I give her. She stays up some nights doing things for me which I would never expect and some nights she will cry herself to sleep because I upset her or because im not okay. She loves to play fight and she loves it when I look into her eyes and she loves it when I lay in bed with her and just talk absolute shit. She loves long walks and pleasing sights, she loves going to pretty places, she loves the nights and one day she would love to travel the world with the love of her life, even though she’s never been an an airplane before but it’s fine because neither have I. she would love a long car journey to wherever as long as it’s with somebody she loves, she loves old music and she loves to make you happy. She loves wearing casual clothes and rarely ever wants to look “feminine” but I love it because its her character and who she is and she will never change that. She will make me happy even if I’m not making her happy because she loves me and will do anything to see a smile on my face. She doesn’t like going to busy places like concerts or crowds etc, she loves dogs and practically develops bonds with them, she dislikes her dog because she’s ‘boring’ but she still loves her and sees her as a sister, because she’s grown up with her. She is sometimes so full of life and so happy that its literally contagious, her smile makes me smile and her laugh is honestly the best sound ever, I see my future every time I look deeply into her eyes and i realise that she is worth so much more than me yet she sticks around, once she loved me she has not once stopped, ever since that day 3 years ago. Sometimes she will act heartless but only because she wants me to show her that I care, sometimes she’ll cry and not tell me because she wants me to figure it out. She doesn’t like to be around many people, she doesn’t want to go to college because she hates the whole school vibe but I respect her for that because going straight for a apprenticeship takes guts, she doesn’t have many friends and although people think they know her, I can assure you they don’t, she will make you feel as though you know her but you really don’t, even I don’t know/understand her to the full extent, because she doesn’t really let anybody in unless she really wants to tell them something, she doesn’t really open up to anybody, she may talk a lot on the phone sometimes but in real life it is the complete opposite because she will become shy. She loves her dads car because of it’s blacked out windows so people can’t see her. I’d describe her as mysterious and as every single day which goes on I carry on learning more about her. She is the book I’ve opened and I will carry on reading her till I am finished reading her which will be never because she is an endless story. She loves it when I hype her up when she looks beautiful when I replay, screenshot and reply with endless emojis because her beauty takes away my breath. Sometimes she’ll have an attitude because she’s upset about something and she wants me to figure it out. But her attitude is nothing to fuck with at all because she can talkkkkk I assure you, she will fight her opinion onto you and she will make her point, but she won’t say a word in person, regardless of the arguments and regardless of the heartlessness she will love me entirely and will carry on doing so and I will never question that. Her heart is made of gold and she will always want what is best for me. I’d keep on going because this isn’t everything about her, if I could, but quite honestly I’d be going on for hours, I could never lie, me and her have made the most happiest and craziest memories together, and I could never doubt that. If forever does not last for me and her and you’re the next person who falls in love with her, take this all in and realise what you’re getting yourself into. Treat her well because she is honestly a queen, you’ll learn to love her, but let me assure you something, you will never love her half as much as I do. But for now and hopefully till forever, she is mine and I will carry on loving her till the day I die.
—  dedicated to my wife.
Just a thought...

So one of the things that I love about this season of Camp Camp, is that while it’s still pretty whimsical and hilarious, it’s shown some real character development in Max and David.

MAX:

Let’s face it, this kid was a die hard troublemaker and a fucking asshole all stuffed inside a tiny ten year old’s body.

Before now, you couldn’t pay him enough to enjoy anything, especially any of David’s crazy camp activities. Hell, he spent a majority of the first season either trying to escape, or trying to figure out how to destroy the camp from the inside. And he got close sometimes, it all could’ve been over when the FBI tried to arrest David for the stuff Max was looking up on his phone. But the small part of him that said what he was doing was going too far made him speak up and exonerate David. And when he thought he had gone to far in his mischievous act that David actually wanted to kill him, he was legitimately afraid and wanted to take back his actions, unlike when he was in the forest with the Quartermaster where it was more likely for him to be murdered and just accepted his fate.

And more importantly, Max was unwilling to accept that people like David existed anymore, and was willing to go to great lengths to break him. And he did. It took twelve episodes but in the end, Max won. David was utterly defeated.

And then Max had to learn the harsh lesson that sure, while life can sometimes be a piece of shit, people can choose too not look past it, but to live with it and still find the good in what’s left. Max was just too jaded by things we know not of, and so was David, and he still found the strength to be himself every day because if he didn’t, Camp Campbell would be even more miserable than Max already thought it was. And because of that, Max decided to help him just for the sake of preserving this optimism.

And now, Max has learned to kind of go with the flow. He’s no longer trying to escape or sabotage David’s every action, he’s just kicking back, relaxing, and enjoying the show.

More so, when Daniel invaded the camp, Max actually sought out David’s help rather than trying to figure out how to get rid of him on his own. And when nothing he did convinced David of Daniel’s murderous intentions, he entered the Purification Sauna, knowing full well he’d be hypnotized into loving Daniel, but had enough faith in David to remove his rose tinted glasses, finally see the truth, and save all the campers from certain death.

And when David got his heart broken by Bonquisha, he and the rest of the children went to great lengths to try and get them back together so he would stop being so depressed all the time.

That’s a lot of character development for a kid.

DAVID:

As for David, his transition has been a lot more subtle.

This happy go-lucky camp counselor is still pretty much the same, while at the same time completely different. The David of first season was optimistic to a fault. He out right refused to see the bad in people, especially Cameron Campbell, got bullied by the kids into leaving the camp for a day, had no clue how to discipline children, and had an unhealthy obsession with being the best camp counselor. And it killed him every day when he couldn’t figure out why none of the kids loved Camp Camp(bell) as much as he did.

There were even some points in the show where his mask slipped and he looked actually angry for once before going back to Happy David.

Until he was pushed to the edge by Max in the season finale of season one and he finally laid all of his cards on the table. He knew perfectly well that not everything was sunshine and roses all the time, but he had a choice. He could be like Max, pessimistic and down right bitter about the world, or he could try to see the good in the world every day and be the best version of himself he could be.

But he also learned a valuable lesson that day. It was okay to not be himself all the time. Sure, he could still be overly enthusiastic about everything, but he could still let go every now and again. Be it wanting to kick out the psycho cult leader you almost hired and may or may not have been after your job-

or sometimes fucking up and saying the wrong thing-

or being openly disappointed in the decisions other people make-

or admitting that you made a mistake that started off with good intentions-

or getting your heart broken-

needing to cry for days on end (even when it’s super awkward)-

and beating the shit out of some guy for something that wasn’t really their fault but only because you’re insanely jealous because they’re banging your babe now.

FINAL POINT:

So in the end, sure, they’re still pretty similar to how they started off in the show.

But the two of them have grown so much, I can’t wait to see where this show is going to take us next.

what’s most beautiful to me about today’s video, was Dan and Phil’s perspectives on coincidences in the universe. it’s not even that it was nice to see them disagreeing and bantering on screen again, it’s not even that it was nice to get a bigger peek into their mind. 

It’s the weird way they compliment each other. 

Dan’s the guy who looks at the world and see’s beauty in the randomness, in the coincidences and how things come together. Dan’s the guy who believes in luck just about as far as you can throw it, who recognizes that it’s pure chance that something happens, but that at the same time, we’re all master’s of our own individual universes. Dan’s the guy who stops and smiles at the fact that, out of all the possibilities in the universe, he found his best friend on the internet and made an amazing, beautiful career out of it, because of his choices, and not because of luck, or fate, or any of that. 

But Phil… Phil’s the guy who looks at the world and sees magic in everything that transpires. Phil’s the guy who see’s the moon and the sun and the spinning of the earth as far more than just coincidence. Phil’s the guy who walks in two worlds, living a literal magical surrealism, with his head in the clouds but his feet on the ground. Phil’s the guy who can recognize that things are just the way they are, that this is reality and that’s how it will always be, but who see’s the magical currents in the air tying people together, drawing them towards what they’re meant to be and have. Phil’s the guy who looks a coincidence and see’s magic, but even as fanciful as his ideas sometimes may seem, he’s always got one foot on the ground. 

The idea that these two people can come together, and center each other? That’s magic in and of itself. 

I imagine Phil holding Dan tight in his arms when he’s crying and scared because the world just keeps on spinning without him and if he stops moving he’d loose all his chances, and Phil promising him that it’ll all be okay. The world knows how to keep its balance, and there’s something, something there that will keep them both afloat. Maybe, just maybe, some things really do happen for a reason.

I imagine Dan patting Phil on the back after something tragic has happened and reassuring him that not everything happens for a reason. Sometimes, it’s just coincidence in the more purely unmagical way of all, and there’s not always something that can be done to stop it. It’s not Phil’s fault, it’s never his fault, its just the universe, uncaring, staring with cold eyes down at him and doing… what needs to be done. 

Fanon is better than canon.

Don’t get me wrong, I love JKR and love everything canon, however, Slytherin’s in the books are (rather terribly) always described as evil, ugly, stupid or all of the above with the exception of Draco Malfoy. Canonically, Millicent Bulstrode is described as ogre-like, Pansy on more than one occasion is described as a dog and she has no relevance to anything other than being a bitch. Crabbe and Goyle are described as stupid and negatively associated with being overweight (not that that is a bad thing in some situations). Marcus Flint, held back for being stupid, is a manipulative cheater with bad teeth. Blaise Zabini’s only character depth is that although he is attractive and presumably very smart, his mum is a whore so he must be evil.

People get mad when people assume Slytherin’s are bad… and that is all the fault of the author of the Harry Potter series herself, whether intentional or coincidental.

As a fandom who are still so active after so many years, we have built a beautiful fanon world where anything and anyone is up to our own personal, colourful interpretation.

Thanks to us, Pansy Parkinson may be a typical mean girl because she has insecurities about hiding her lesbian relationship or she may be a kickass feminist. Marcus Flint may have a crippling crush on Oliver Wood and he may be a muggle who was adopted by purebloods. Millicent Bulstrode is now no longer an ogre but a beautiful girl with a soft stomach and round face and contagious smile. Even Draco Malfoy has been developed by us, the readers, in such a way that we sometimes even cry at the things that he’s been through WHEN HE HASN’T EVEN CANONICALLY BEEN THROUGH THEM.

Imagine the common room full of cold, frowning, ugly people. Then imagine the common room full of these eclectic, cunning and determined characters. Imagine which common room you would rather be in.

That’s why I will always support any headcanon you throw my way, Slytherin, Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, major character, minor character, real ship, fake ship, golden trio era, marauder era, next generation; anything, because fanon just makes things 100 times better.

Some thoughts on the Maheswaran mother-daughter relationship

Connie looked so much like Dr. Maheswaran in this episode.

It’s adorable because in the canon time of the show, she’s picked up on her mother’s mannerisms in the way that a decade of living with her did not. It’s shows how much they’ve grown together as a family, and how their relationship has changed.

Considering this was how she looked in her first appearance:

There’s a marked change not only in design but also in her expressions.

And it’s been hinted at before, but in this scene, she so explicitly worries about her mother the way her mother worries about her. It’s very touching, especially because we know they started out caring about each other but not understanding one another. Because you  can love someone and never try to understand them. It leads to a lot of conflict but both parties can still come out of it feeling like they did what was “best” for the other.

Connie used to think it was better that her mother knew nothing so the latter wouldn’t worry about her. And Dr. Maheswaran wanted to be on top of everything so that Connie would have an easier life. 

What we learn from them is that to be able to love someone better, we open up to them and let them open up to us. Connie used to act as though her parents were infallible, or at the least, able to manage themselves. Over time, and in this episode, she’s shown to be worried about them because she knows they’re human beings too. They can get hurt, make mistakes, and put themselves in danger.

Knowing these things puts the other person in perspective. It makes their place in our lives mean more. And it makes it harder to take the people we love for granted.

So I would say Connie and her mother interact a lot more now. They probably talk about each other’s days. Notice how even Dr. Maheswaran talked about everything that happened to her prior to picking Connie up. She believed her daughter deserved an explanation. And that’s a far cry from the mother who would proudly bring out the “Because I said so,” and “We’re doing this because we love you,” cards in Fusion Cuisine.

Not everyone has this experience with their parents. Sometimes things just happen to drive parents and children apart. But in their case it worked out, and now they each have one more person who will always be there for them.

When Connie told her mother that Steven just came from outer space, there was no incredulous reaction. Only an, “Oh?” in an interested and calm tone. 

They’re both trying. And I’m certain they still have their share of disagreement, but it’s dealt with in a much healthier way now.

The Types and Their Level of Scariness
  • <p> <b>INTJ:</b> At first they might seem worrisome because of their intense stare and nihilistic sentiments, but all it takes is one harsh critique about something important to them and they'll crumble. Their bark is infinitely worse than their bite. Will write a series of salty "blind item" blog entries about you for months. 6/10; too passive-aggressive to be truly scary.<p/><b>INFJ:</b> Hard to get to know, but when they like you, they REALLY like you and you'd better not do anything to break their trust because all of those warm, fuzzy feelings will 180 into pure end-times-level wrath. If you've ever encountered an angry INFJ, you've seen the face of the devil himself. 10/10; scary af<p/><b>ENTJ:</b> While they're capable of verbally disemboweling someone they dislike, they won't actually come after you unless they're bored and feel like starting drama for shits and giggles. Threw a punch once and didn't like it too much. Will tell you to go choke on a bag of dicks with the biggest, brightest smile on their face. 6/10; scary only in theory<p/><b>ENFJ:</b> They love you so, SO much and they want you to do your absolute BEST at EVERYTHING you EVER do like REALLY really, so when you don't meet their expectations, they will get more and more assertive about you achieving your dreams (read: their dreams) until they eventually snap and stab you to death in your sleep. 9/10; file a restraining order and you might be okay.<p/><b>INTP:</b> Too lazy to truly get mad about anything. The only really scary thing about INTPs is their complete disregard for cleanliness. You'll find Chinese takeout boxes from six months ago covered in maggots by their bed, but you won't find nary a discouraging word coming out of their mouths. Only does damage to living things in RPGs. 2/10; scary hygiene but harmless.<p/><b>INFP:</b> Is someone who spends a lot of time writing poetry, getting drunk and crying hysterically about things that happened ten years ago really that scary? I mean, they'll probably throw a whiskey glass or a vase in your general direction and curse you out for a solid ten minutes, but then they'll go right back to crying in fetal position. 4/10; just walk away, dude.<p/><b>ENTP:</b> They'll fuck with you just for the sake of having something to do that day. They'll fuck with you sometimes for no reason whatsoever. They fuck with people because it's just in their nature. Occasionally they'll take things too far and you'll wind up in the hospital but probably never in a morgue. Might send you flowers during your hospital stay. 8/10; scary neurotic<p/><b>ENFP:</b> They're either your best friend or your worst enemy and there is literally no in-between. Sometimes they'll get mad at you for reasons you don't even understand. Rarely ever will they try to physically harm you, though. They'll just whine about "fake people" in their DeviantART journal and mope about for a long time before randomly deciding you're their friend again. 4/10; Super confusing but not scary.<p/><b>ISTJ:</b> The embodiment of "walk softly and carry a big stick". Will sit outside of your bedroom window for days with a shotgun, ready for you to make a wrong move so they can blow you to smithereens. Don't try calling the police, because they're probably a police officer or at least connected to one in some way. In other words, you're fucked. 10/10; lawful evil personified.<p/><b>ISFJ:</b> They love you with all their hearts but they also hate the things you do, ie "love the sin, hate the sinner". Usually harmless, but some of them quickly lose their shit when double-crossed. Might mix poison in your sweet tea and then bury you underneath a bed of roses in the backyard. Prays for your certainly-damned soul every night before supper. 7/10, only scary when provoked.<p/><b>ESTJ:</b> Their big mouths and intense, confrontational attitudes can put the fear of God into you, but for an ESTJ to truly be scary, they'd have to physically harm you and they don't want to jeopardize their careers over something that foolish. Will judge you hardcore from afar but that's about it. 5/10; talks shit but you won't get hit.<p/><b>ESFJ:</b> They're the undisputed champions of guilt-trips, and they'll guilt-trip you over things so incessantly that you might suffer a loss of self-worth in the process, which could lead to severe depression and no will to live. Will attend your post-suicide funeral in a really expensive dress and tell mourners how you could have "really been something". 6/10; scary shady<p/><b>ISTP:</b> No chill towards people they dislike. They will straight-up brutalize your ass in one-on-one combat and you will lose. Will put you in the hospital, wait until you've been released, and THEN put you in a morgue. Probably will laugh about killing you over cold ones with the boys for decades to come. 10/10; cold-blooded killers.<p/><b>ISFP:</b> There is no such thing as a scary ISFP. They might get hurt with you but they just let that shit go after a while. More likely to channel their negative feelings into an artistic outlet than something destructive. No time for pettiness or holding grudges. 0/10; anti-scary saviors<p/><b>ESTP:</b> Also has no chill towards people they dislike, but their hair-brained schemes at revenge are often poorly executed. Will threaten to "beat your ass" for months but won't actually do it unless they're drunk or high. Once they do get physically aggressive towards you though, you are deader than dead. 7/10; flee town before things escalate.<p/><b>ESFP:</b> Often incorrigibly shallow, they'll start rumors to sully the reputation of their enemies before they'd actually consider getting their hands dirty. Rarely ever starts fights but they sure do love jumping into other peoples' fights and finishing them. Will get one of their besties to film the entire beat-down and put it on Snapchat. Hair and makeup somehow stays flawless the entire time. 3/10; more petty than scary.<p/></p>
INFPs ARE NOT SAD, OKAY

I’ve let this go on for too long.

INFPs did not invent sadness, nor do they cry all the time. INFPs are bodies of hope in spite of the sadness around them. I like to think that they invented hope and optimism, because despite the horrible things they know of ourselves, they believe the best about others.

Maybe INFPs are fragile for good reason. Don’t you think that a ripe apple tree in the middle of a rotten orchard would tend to be a little distraught sometimes? The world is an ugly place. Guess what? Despite all of this, the stereotyped cry-baby of the MBTI would go there to the end for people they’ve never met.

INFPs did not invent sadness. They invented hope.

did I ever tell yall about Source?bot because what the hell

back in the day some absolute madman allowed me to have an iota of power in an IRC chatroom and I introduced a bot named Source?bot, who, no matter what you said, would reply “Source?”, therefore implying you were a liar and a scammer no matter what you were saying

this was mostly funny but when a lot of people were in chat it got kind of annoying because “Source?” would get spammed and like, sometimes people would say things like “sorry I wasn’t online, my granny just died” and in would come Source?bot, with the comforting cry of “Source?”

anyway you could shut Source?bot up for a while by posting a link with “google” in the URL because obviously Google is the Uncontested Proover of Facts so people would have a link handy to just drop whenever Source?bot did its thing, and it turned into a chat meme because people would Google weird shit so if you clicked it or looked at the url you would see some really questionable stuff

so one day this new person signs in and is like “hey, I’m new” and Source?bot shows up like “Source?” and the kid’s like “???” and then I show up  like “sorry about that” and drop a link to shut it up

the link, in keeping with the chat meme, was a Google search for “step by step masturbation guide?? help ”

and this was the new guy’s first interaction with a literal chat admin so like. there you have it.

Letters To The Zodiac Signs

Aries: I envy you. I envy your courage, your stupidity and your childishness. Maybe you’re asking “Why?” Well, wouldn’t it be beautiful if we were all children at heart, like you? Like seeing things so horrible yet still making corny jokes? Like telling your feelings, like running until your feet hurt? Like purity, like innocence mixed with knowledge? You have experienced the world, you have experienced life. And yet, you still stand here. Brave and tall. As if to say “I am not afraid of life. I am not afraid to live.”

Taurus: I will always associate you with flowers and colours. With lilies and roses and blood oranges. I will always associate you with fruit and red-green-yellow. We will speak in colours, talk in words others won’t understand. With red-grey sand and blue-green eyes. An encouraging nod, a hug with clasping hands. Words left unspoken simply ‘cause they were never meant to be said, they were meant to be. They were meant to be. Plucking petals like a grade schooler playing games about love. Holding a magnifying glass over your head, and I could not find a flaw. I just saw you. I saw you.

Keep reading

What I learnt after losing 20kg in 3 months

1. It always starts on a high note but the key thing is to keep it going.

You see someone losing a lot of weight and suddenly you are so inspired and pumped to reach your ideal weight, or you realise that you have put on a significant amount of weight and decide to crash diet. It could even be for an upcoming important event. Usually this inspiration will last for a week or two, after which you start to give yourself a little more allowance, this is where most people fall back to where they were. It happened to me countless times.

You have to want it bad enough.

2. You have to be consistent.

Losing weight is hard af, but the important thing is to be consistent. This is what I did:

- take weekly progress photos (whenever I see how my body changes week by week I’m motivated to push on)

- weigh in weekly (I know how easy it is to be obsessed with the scale)

- follow inspiring people (this helps you more than you think)

- whenever I feel lazy to work out, which happens almost every single day, I tell myself this: ‘if you get out there and do what you have to for 30mins, you are one step closer to your goal. If not, the time will pass anyway even if you’re scrolling through Facebook.’

3. Workout

I started with swimming because it was the easiest. You don’t sweat as much, it’s easy on your knees, and it burns a shit load of calories.

After some time, I switched over from swimming to cycling HIIT on my stationary bike. After which I started doing blogilates’s PIIT28, and started hitting the gym after that.

What I’m trying to say is, change up your activities once in a while! Add some variation to your workout by keeping things interesting and you will look forward to it.

My best friend got me out of my comfort zone. I have been so unfit all my life that I wasn’t able to complete even a 2.4km jog. She dragged me along for a run and I fell in love with jogging. To be fair it happened about 6 weeks after I started working out.

It doesn’t get easier, you just get better!

You only need 30mins a day to complete your daily workout. Choose one workout, be it jogging or HIIT, and just do it!

No matter how tired I am, I make sure to get my 30mins in. Sometimes I impress myself with my determination.

4. Moral support

You’re committed to your goals and are working hard towards it. We all know it gets lonely sometimes. Motivate a friend to do the same! Motivate each other when things get tough or the scale is not budging. I’m lucky to have my BFF on this journey together with me.

Even for those who discourage you or those who once called you fat, you got to have the fire in you to make a change and prove them wrong!

Do it for yourself, your love ones. I know you can. I have fallen off the wagon many times too. But the lower you fall, the higher you will fly. Believe in yourself. I promise you, once you start believing, everything will fall in place. There will not be success without failure. You will get there sunshine. One day you will shine. You just got to start believing in yourself and start working damn hard towards your goal.

Old saying but pushes me a lot: 
it’s never going to be easy but it’s going to be SO worth it.

5. You didn’t gain it overnight, don’t expect to lose it in a month.

Don’t be demoralised just because people ain’t noticing the changes. Don’t beat yourself up.

I gave myself 6 months to reach my goal weight. 7kg more to go! Yay!

6: Your boobs/butt will shrink, there might be loose skins/ stretchmarks if you lose weight too fast.

What I did for boobs and butt:

Do planks and squats every day. Yes every day. It helps firms your boobs and squats give your flat booty a lift. 

I learnt this the hard way. Losing 50kg in a year 2 years ago definitely tested my skin’s elasticity. I researched ways to reduce the appearance of stretch marks since the only way you eliminate them is through a laser surgery.

Loose skins and stretchmarks are tricky. I tried everything so I can’t pinpoint what worked and what didn’t.  But it reduced the appearance of stretchmarks and my skin doesn’t look too loose either.

What I did:

- Drink lots of water (it really works!)

- Dry brushing

- Body scrubs (if you ask me I would say coffee scrub, I didn’t start selling it for no reason)

- Bio oil

- Clarins body tonic oil

- Weight training/resistance training                        

7. Relationship with food

Many asked me what meal plans do I follow or do I have certain calorie restrictions.

I have to clarify that I’m not going for a hot lean body hence this method might not work for you if you are going for that.

I do not follow any specific meal plans. I did many times in the past and tried countless meal plans including Herbal life, natroslim or even master cleanse diet. I’m not saying that all these doesn’t work, they do. You will see yourself losing weight, but it isn’t sustainable.

I eat whatever I want now but I control the portions strictly. I cut out sugar drinks too. Don’t underestimate the calories you are taking in as well, it could be the reason why you are not seeing results.

Learn to say no when being offered food (who does that?!). It’s not easy to say no to the piece of chocolate your best friend got for you, but it’s even harder burning it off later during your workout. If you didn’t plan to eat it, don’t. Save it for another day.

There are days when I have peanut butter toast in the morning, fish soup for lunch and economic rice without any rice (just the meat and vege side dishes) for dinner.

But there will also be days where I crave fried chicken. I order them without sides and go without sugar drinks.

Sometimes I live on ban mian (Singapore-style noodles with mince pork soup) without finishing the noodles. Or some days I have fruits before going to bed.

I try to keep my calorie intake within 1500. I don’t feel starved at all and I eat whatever I want in moderation. It keeps me content to keep going.

You are what you eat. If you know the food you are craving for is unhealthy, have it in small amounts. We all know what happens when we over indulge. A healthy journey consists of 80% diet and 20% exercise.

Food that will help you in your journey:

- Water, just drink enough water.

- Unsweetened green tea, yes you’ve heard this 2 million times. But it works.

- Fruits: Papayas, Watermelons, Apples, Bananas, Lemons and Kiwis.

- Needless to say lots of vegetables

Try new recipes like cauliflower rice. Or replace potato chips with kale chips.

There won’t be any food to avoid in my list because I genuinely believe in moderation.

8. Curbing cravings

You just had dinner but you are craving for dessert. We all know it’s not acceptable to do it every day.

I’d go for a jog if I were you. The cravings for unhealthy food usually subside after a run. You’ll burn 150 calories with 30 minutes of jogging, but it takes 1 serving of potato chips to gain it back. Is it worth it? You be the judge.

If not I’ll find an alternative like yogurt or fruits to curb the cravings.

The last method is to take off your clothes in front of the mirror and stare at your body. Tell me if you still want that tiramisu after that.

Many times we eat not because we need it but because we want it. A treat is only a treat if you have it once in a while. 

9. Shitty days

Just recently I broke down and cried just because I felt fat. I felt like the ugliest/biggest girl in the world and I just wanted to hide away from the world. There will be days where you feel like shit and nothing you do makes sense to you.

I allowed myself to cry and tell myself that I’m not good enough.

Sometimes we have to embrace our emotions instead of hiding them. Only when we acknowledge what we are feeling, will we be able to fix what’s really broken inside.

After my emotional battle, I pick myself up and continue whatever I was doing. I fixed what was going on inside and stayed focused. People around me saw results. I saw my results. I deserved every single bit of it because I worked hard for it.

Happiness is a choice. You are how you feel about yourself.

Don’t give up on something just because of the time or the difficulty to achieve it. The time will pass anyway. If you don’t work on yourself, who’s going to do it.

I learnt to love myself for every stretchmark, cellulite and scar that’s on me. At the same time, I do my best to be a better version of myself.

10. Take a break If you are tired, not quit.

Lastly, regardless how many times you fail, as long as you get up and try again, you will succeed in the end.

Getting healthy is not a quick fix, it’s a lifestyle. There will be days you feel like eating fast food and not working out. But as long as you get back on your feet the next day, I promise that everything will work out.

Never ever give up on yourself and your body, because you are the only one living in it.

Hope this helps!! Happy 2017! Keep on rocking! :) Let’s embrace 2017 together and achieve whatever you need to acheive!

@motiveweight - submission 

Hello, Gentle Reader. This is Fan Fiction.

Recently, I’ve seen some rumblings across my dashboard about fan fiction again.  

I don’t want to dive into a debate because all the information that I have to go on are second hand sources and there’s always going to be a bit of bias there, because one person can see it in one way and another person can perceive it in another way.  

I’d rather explain to you, New and Gentle Reader, what fan fiction is, if this is the first time you’ve heard about it.  

Fan fiction is what happens when you walk out of the theater, turn off the TV, the radio, close that book or whatnot for the first time and ask yourself  “What happens next?"  Or:  "What if it happened THIS way instead?"  Fan fiction is what happens when you are six or seven years old and you take your dolls, your action figures, your stuffed toys and various household items as props and send them all onto adventure.  Maybe Barbie rescues G.I. Joe from Cobra or Optimus Prime fights the Evil Transforming Kitchen Thingy that Mom uses for making meatloaf but should really be the Evil Transforming Dark Lord of the Sith.  

Fan fiction is what happens when you are ten and you’re discovering how to really write for the first time and you put words on the page, in your math and English notebooks, one sentence after another, style be damned, painstakingly bringing forth to life the images in your head of your cartoon and movie and book heroes.  

Fan fiction happens when you are in your teens and you want to be the hero or the heroine of the story and you want to fight alongside Captain America and the Avengers and go on the Quest to Erebor or save Frodo from the effects of the Ring.  

Fan fiction happens when you are in your twenties or your thirties or beyond that and you are still writing because you just enjoy and love telling stories.  There’s a new maturity to your writing and that happens because you’re a bit older, though maybe not wiser, but you still love telling the stories anyway.  People tell you that you should write for money and sometimes you think, hey I could try that and you dream.  And sometimes you just smile and say, "I just like telling stories” and that is more than enough for you.  

And sometimes people fall in love in your stories, regardless of sex or gender.  Sometimes they fight.  Sometimes they laugh.  They cry.  They hate.  They die.  Sometimes they kiss.  Sometimes they make love.  Sometime it’s just sex.  You keep writing.  You can’t help it.  You get that idea and you just need to write it down.  Word for word.  One sentence after another.  Just like when you were a kid and you’d wear your pencils to stubs and let your pens run out of ink as you shape the letters.  

That’s fan fiction.  Sometimes, the best stories in the world start because they were fan fiction.  Ask Shakespeare.  Ask Jules Verne.  Ask Neil Gaiman.  

Gentle Reader, if this is your first time in here, then I hope you might find the time to read my stories.  I humbly ask, because a fan fiction writer’s currency is in the feedback of his or her readers and we’re happy to hear from them when it’s good and devastated when we get hate from those who don’t even have the courage to sign their names.  If it’s not for you, then I understand.  It’s all right.  Move on, that’s okay.  These aren’t the droids you’re looking for.  Maybe there’s something else you’d like.  It’s fine.  

And this is what I hope for if you do decide to venture in.

I hope you smile.  I hope you laugh.  I hope that you ended up snorting coffee out your nose in the middle of Starbucks.  (Here’s a napkin.  Sorry that I’m not sorry?)  I hope that I made you giggle in the middle of the subway or the bus stop and you get weird looks from folks passing by.  

I hope you cry, because sometimes I write sad things and that makes me cry too.  Here’s a tissue.  It’s okay.  Sometimes there are no happy endings.

I hope you are frightened, but only in a way that a good, scary story can make you feel frightened.  Sometimes there are dark and terrible things out there and they’re part of the Story too.  Hold my hand.  It’s all right.  I’ve got you.

I hope you blush and maybe smile a little later when love and romance and sweet things are told.  Love is a gift and true love is meant to endure.  And sometimes there’s hurt and pain and grief in there too, but you already know that.  You’ve lived that.  Sometimes we do have happy endings after all.  There’s always hope.  

Are you ready?

It doesn’t always start with “once upon a time” or “a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away…” but every story starts somewhere.  

Turn the page.  Click the button.

Here we go.    

autistic keith

  • at the garrison he Loved the order of everything, everything was always the same and it made him so content
  • when he was living in his hermit desert shack tho he wasnt lonely at all. sign him the fuck up he loved being a hermit and not having to interact with anyone
  • tries to just rub his fingertips together as a stim instead of ripping out his cuticles and ending up with his fingertips bloody
  • “keith you’re bleeding!!”
    “oh.”
    “doesn’t it hurt?”
    “..no.”
  • food goo has the worst Texture Ever“
  • “can everyone please stop chewing and making noise?? also i need total darkness” because hes about to start crying due to a sensory overload
  • he never says that though, he just gets up and leaves and goes and cries in the hallway. it sucks
  • pidge sees him crying one time and hugs him tightly and the pressure helps him calm down. 
  • they dont talk about it
  • when people touch him it takes him a minute to register the contact, so sometimes hunk will poke him from behind to get his attention, and it takes a few seconds for him to turn around and ask whats up
  • “what’re you staring at?” “nothing”
  • his hair is long because its a stim!!! he messes with it all the time!!!
  • loves his hair in his eyes cuz its like sunglasses.. good for getting rid of the light
  • sometimes you just gotta lay in your bed in total darkness and blow your eardrums out with bass music. it lets all the tension in his chest go away.
  • his jacket makes him feel safe and the collar is so nice. time to pop it up and rap it tightly around his neck. he cant leave anywhere without it
  • hes gotta have something on him when hes sleeping. even in the desert he’d sleep with a big weighted blanket on him and just have the fan blowing directly on his face
  • doesnt get when someone is being sarcastic
  • lance, jokingly: we’re not friends anymore :/
    keith: time to mcfucking die
Sad Magnus Chase headcanons bc I'm feeling sad today

💔 Magnus crying alone after his mom dies and having nowhere to go. He flinched in a corner on the sidewalk and cried himself till sleep
💔 He spent 3 days without eating until he started to turn the trash cans
💔 In his first winter as homeless, it was so cold on some nights that he cried wrapped in his thin blanket
💔 It was common for him to spend a few days without getting any change or food
💔 Young Hearth starving himself till the limit because food cost golden coins
💔 Young Hearth not quite understanding what his parents said after his brother’s death because they refused to sign and he was crying too much to read lips
💔 Hearth not caring about if he would live or die while he fells in Nidavellir
💔 Blitz going back to home alone after find out that his father was dead
💔 Blitz having no one to talk. Sometimes, he spent days without say a single word and leave home
💔 Blitz trying to produce something “real dwarves” do but crying in frustation
💔 Alex feeling totally confused because she doesnt feel like a “regular boy”
💔 Alex dressing up like she wants and her mortal father and step mother just saying that she wants “embarrass them even more”
💔 They keeping Alex out of view when received visits because how would they even explain what is Alex
💔 Alex preferring live on the streets that live with her “family”
💔 Sam crying on her room because the kids were being mean about her being muslim
💔 Sam trying to not care about the looks people give to her and her grandparents on the streets
💔 Sometimes, Magnus can’t eat or drink. He’s in the middle of the feast when he suddenly thinks about all the people that don’t have nothing to eat, like him when he was homeless. Sometimes, he lost the appetite for days. On these days, Alex enter in his room and put his head on her lap and he cries while she tries to calm him “I know, Maggie, I know”
💔 homeless Hearth giving the food he finds to Magnus and Blitz because he’s more used to stay hungry
💔 Sam waking up screaming from a nightmare about Loki controlling her
💔 Sometimes, Blitz calls by Hearth, forgeting he cant listen. When he doesn’t anwser, Blitz just panics. So Hearth just finds him crying “I-I thought you left me… I don’t want… to be alone…I’m so so patetic”
💔 The whole squad having existential crisis bc the world will end anyway