sometimes being a lot of the time

anonymous asked:

so, like, i cant explain it well but i like reigen in this chapter a lot? i mean, he's bringing with him a bunch of kids he's only seen for the first time and he just, roll with it? from the beginning? like he speaks to them like they were equal? tome crying and throwing a tantrum and he just keeps his cool and asked if she could walk? but imagine an adult being in the same situation i think reigen would just be "dude grow up we need to get moving"? i...i love him?

YEAH I MEAN SOMETIMES I FORGET HOW RESPONSIBLE AND MATURE REIGEN IS like…hes a very good adult hes very patient. like you said yeah another adult would probably be done n angry at this point but reigen is a g and the Ultimate Babysitter/Friend To All Teens

I have so much anxiety about growing old and dying like I want to live in this moment forever. I don't want to have to grow old and see people I love die too.

Idk why I get so wrapped up in these thoughts sometimes. All it takes is small thought about old ppl, especially dementia, and I start thinking about when my parents will get that old. And how will I feel and what will I do about it

I’m also just stressed a lot lately about a lot of things so it might just be displaced stressed. 

Most of the time I’m just like eh we all have to die one day but hopefully its a long time from now but then sometimes I think like one day that this’ll all be over and I cant go back to being 17, or 25, or 42 or 57 and relive that year. All I have is now. 

anonymous asked:

How do you manage to read, draw, and watch as many movies as you do with a full time job? Do you ever get too overwhelmed?

I have a very busy, noisy brain. I draw and sew while I watch movies, read whenever I can manage the time (sometimes at work) and don’t sleep much. Being a multitasking insomniac means you get a lot done and don’t know how to relax.

I went to this therapist back when I was finishing highschool, it help a little with my mood swings, tho sometimes it felt as if I was being treated like a little kid, and the therapy sometimes made me uncomfortable because it involved a lot of touch

This was one of the first times I confessed about being trans

He always asked to talk with my father alone after all our sessions, I didn’t though much about it at first, until one day my dad was yelling at me, telling me that the therapist said I was “immature and needy” and that I needed a strict hand on me (even tho family abuse was the reason i was seeing a therapist)

That make me lose trust in therapy

Six months later it turned out that the therapist was really homophobic and was against the lgtb community, I’m talking big time homophobic

Wish I could say I’m seeing someone better now, but I abandoned all therapy and medications after that, things had gone way worse for me and it made me lose confidence in trusting others, I feel everyone is going to use things against me now or tell all my secrets on my parents

Rules: Answer questions & tag 20 amazing people you would like to get to know

Tagged by: @ximajs

Name: It starts with an M
Nickname: muku, kk, keyladeda, lots of variations of my name
Zodiac sign: Taurus
Height: 5'7"
Orientation: I’d like a husband someday but I’ve been accused multiple times of being asexual so whatever
Ethnicity: I’m a white American but my dad’s side of the family is pretty German
Fave season: fall
Fave books: Harry Potter series, Leviathan
Fave scent: lemon pound cake
Coffee, tea, or hot cocoa: I hate all of these. I just drink water and sometimes juice.
Average sleep hours: 6-5 or less
Cats or dogs: cats but I think I’m mildly allergic to both
Number of blankets: 4
Number of followers: 4,663

I tag: no one, I’m feeling too shy so just assume I tag everyone :-)

So, I’ve recently hit 1k+ on here.

And I’m totally speechless.

Being on Tumblr, I have made new records for my self. I get a lot of support from all the shares and comments and it’s just..I can’t even believe it sometimes.

There are times where I feel down about my art but I’ll always keep drawing. Just apart of the artist life. :)

And as long as I still got my friends and you guys supporting me, I won’t stop sharing❣️

Thank you, to all of you!! I really mean it!

anonymous asked:

am I the only one who wasn't allowed to close my door at night... or ever? I feel like it's a violation of privacy, but I don't see anyone else talking about anything like it so I'm really just feeling like I'm being oversensitive and stuff,,, idk

No, it’s definitely a thing. I was allowed to close my door (but not lock it, or it’d get taken off the hinges), but a lot of my friends weren’t allowed to close their doors at night, or really any time, sometimes even if they were getting dressed.

It’s a huuuge violation of privacy. Everybody, no matter how old they are, should have the ability to set boundaries like that. It’s how it should be.

3

o shit waddup the character designs are here ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I’ll be posting the actual tattoo designs later on. Here’s just the general idea. 

So, as promised, more on my Sun/Moon Spirit AU!

  • Adrien wears a lot of clothes due to him being the sun spirit, he is constantly exposed to the heat.
  • And onto that, another reason he wears a lot of clothes aka the giant robe is because he has a lot of scars and all sorts from battles, the heat and just general angsty shit (more to come on this next time)
  • I’ll give you this though; because Mari has rejected him for…decades, sometimes he gets lonely which is why out of the two, he is more likely to go to his human version so he can to interact with people.
  • But, their human forms have restrictions. 
  • To transform into their human versions, they have to take off their respective earrings. 
  • They have a limited amount of time in their human versions, as the time passes, their tattoos begin to fade and they cannot, at all costs, have their tattoos fully faded and gone. 
  • If the tattoos fully fade, they become mortals, and as much as Adrien does want to become a mortal, the balance of basically everything in the universe goes to the shits and basically we might die.
  • Due to his excessive use of his human version, he is often scolded by gods. Adrien has never gotten his tattoo fully faded but he’s had some very close calls. 
  • Mari has every constellation on her back as tattoos and as time passes for her in her human form, the constellations disappear one by one. 
  • Both Adrien and Mari are saddened about their losing connection to humans. They were once actively interactive with the people way back then but during the heavy times of industrialisation and of course, environmental issues, sometimes it’s hard for both to reach out. And this has definitely affected both physically…
  • Mari fell in love with Human Adrien in the time of the French Revolution when he fought as a soldier. 
  • In their spirit forms, only animals and chosen humans can sense Adrien and Mari.
  • Birds love Adrien and can sense him more strongly than any other animals and tend to follow him around in his spirit form. 
  • Spirit Adrien has seen Human Mari….more to come on this later. 
  • I’m not going to reveal all of this yet but here’s the thing; the spirits don’t just watch over the people for decades without doing anything…
  • And Mari and Adrien are definitely not the only spirits around. 
  • That’s it for now but yeah….def some more soon ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
2

Journal Series feat. my ootd. Last night was a lot of music, feelings, and rambling, as per usual. Being a teenager is a special time because you’re just figuring out who you are, who you want to be… and journaling is that opportunity you get to be absolutely honest with yourself with no judgment. Sometimes I don’t even know what I’m saying. I just listen to some music and the words flow right out of me. Moments like this are ones that I’m thankful for. I hope that Adult Me will look back on all of these pages one day and laugh because, I guess it wasn’t as bad as I thought after all.

  • Me: why do I feel so sad right now
  • My brain: you're a human being with emotions and a lot of stuff going on in your life, on top of that you have a known history with depression which means sometimes you have moods that don't necessarily reflect your situation, and you've just got to be patient through the times when your contentment lies fallow
  • Me: no that doesn't sound right
  • My brain: oh shit then maybe we should buy like ten dollars worth of candy
  • Me: that seems right, that feels right, I'm glad we had this talk
I spent a lot of time being miserable. It’s like misery is an old friend. And it tricks you sometimes into thinking that it’s just always gonna be there and that you can’t be happy. But you can, you can walk away from pain. And I think being in love’s the best way to do it.
—  One Tree Hill
4

I don’t know if anyone has pointed this out yet, but I wanna say something about episode 9 that barely has anything to do with Yuri or Victor.

Right here we have the common anime character with a strong sister complex. These characters seem to pop up every so often in animes and a lot of the time, it’s a totally normalised thing and the feelings are mutual and it’s sometimes even seen as more normal than the homosexual (not to mention sometimes really unhealthy) relationships that rarely show up in mainstream animes (that end up being shown only to more mature audiences because of the censorship).

But Yuri!!! On Ice doesn’t normalise it. Sure, you might be able to feel a little bit of empathy for him because he seems heartbroken and everything, but that’s it. They point out the fact that this love that he has for his sister is unhealthy and unacceptable. Sara doesn’t accept his feelings for her. She tells him to move on, that they will be fine on their own. That he needs to let go. And he does. He finally lets go of his sister and frees her because he knows that what he wants isn’t mutual. And that really spoke to me.

This anime is more than willing to normalise the obvious homosexual couple (the two even practically say they never want to leave each other). Rather than focusing on the cheap, “Oh, they’re gay, how scandalous, let’s have five episodes with Yuri focusing on how he isn’t gay,” troupe, they get to have a loving relationship where the feelings are mutual, where it’s healthy and they care about and support each other and they don’t have to focus on how they’ll make it work because they’re just so in love with each other. And the relationship that could have been an incestuous one wasn’t regarded as more “normal” or “acceptable” just because the characters would have been in a heterosexual relationship. The creator of this anime is more than aware of what love should be like and how it should be portrayed rather than giving the audience the same exact thing they’ve seen fifty thousand times before just because some other show got away with it. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Yuri!!! On Ice is one of my most favourite animes, not just in the sports genre anymore, but in general because for once the creator of it actually put a lot of time and care into this show and is going to present it exactly as they envisioned it without fitting into any moulds or pleasing the people who have to air it. If you haven’t seen it yet, you really need to.

Being a lone pet

Being a pet without an owner can sometimes make it hard to feel like a “real pet”; trust me, I know. I was a solo pet for quite a long time. But there are some things you can do to make yourself still feel like the pet you are:

  • wear a collar. just because you are not owned, doesn’t mean you cannot wear a collar. if you are a single pet, by choice or by nature, you can still proudly wear a collar of your choice to prove your pet identity and sense of self.
  • set a schedule for yourself. lots of owners like to give their pets vague or strict schedules to adhere to, to keep them productive throughout the day. just because you’re on your own, doesn’t mean a schedule won’t benefit you; in fact, it’s a very healthy habit to get into.
  • give yourself treats, when you earn it. when a pet does something good, owners will typically reward them for their positive efforts. feel free to reward yourself when you finish an assignment, finish your chores, or accomplish a goal you’ve been working toward.
  • go into pet space. give yourself time to be a pet; chase a ball, paw at a mouse, run through the woods. you are a pet and you should make time for yourself to act like one.
  • remember you are valid. so many pets feel as though they are not valid just because the do not have an owner and that is absolutely not true. every pet, no matter their species, owner status, or anything else is any less of a pet than the next. you are a pet, never let anyone take that from you.

there are many other ways to deal with being a pet without an owner (feel free to add your own) but the key is to remember that just because you are on your own, you are not any less of a pet. do what makes you feel like your species (dog, cat, pony, etc.), do what makes you happy. there is nothing that makes you any less of a pet than one that has an owner. your perfect owner will come along someday, just be patient and remember to take care of yourself in the meantime. and message me if you ever need advice or a have any questions.

dating newt would be like:

- he would constantly look at you in amazement, because he feels so lucky to be with you

- he would think of you two as being the “parents” to his many fantastic creatures

- he would always be so happy to be around you, knowing that you had so much to talk about together

- he always felt like he never fit in at school and saw you as his best friend too

- he would be a total ball of fluff, hugging, kissing, cuddling ALL THE TIME

- he would be the type of guy to always hold open doors for you, pull out your seat for you, treat you like a queen

- if he had a bad day all we would want to do is come home to you and hug you

- he would get nervous sometimes, and be a little jumpy around you because he cares a lot what you think of him

- he would do spontaneous things with you, like slow dancing in the kitchen to some nice jazz songs (cue this song)

- he would surprise you all the time, sometimes just showing up with flowers or treats for no reason. just because he loves you

- you would be the only person he feels completely comfortable with watching over his creatures while he is sick or away

- he would always read/write before bed, and you would do the same beside him, just happy to be in each other’s company and share the same interests

- in conclusion: beautiful ball of fluff. this man is too pure and i personally cannot handle it.

okay but as a gay kid that’s struggled a lot with having “silly little crushes” due to how society teaches us that being gay is always in extremes (i.e. the trope of only being “madly” in love with your straight best friend, being obsessively head-over-heels for the popular kid at school you don’t actually know), shout out to night vale for making cecil’s crush on carlos just a “silly little thing” that eventually escalated to sometime more serious in a reasonable and healthy amount of time because honestly you have no idea how refreshing it is to see gay characters actually have normal and realistic relationship development, especially when the alternative has actually negatively affected you in real life

The thing is with writing is that sometimes you have no control over what you write. It’s like being drunk I guess. You do it and then have no memory of it later. You don’t know what you were feeling at the time and you don’t know why you wrote it. Looking back, it doesn’t even make sense but you know there was a lot of pain.
—  Something I learned from writing for three years.

“I feel like I’m the doctor and the patient, but a lot of times the doctor isn’t in. I operate at such a level that sometimes it feels dangerous. If I fell off the edge of myself, I don’t know how long it would take to get back up. People think that I’m on drugs because of this velocity of being. And at the same time it’s slow enough for me to be aware of it. Like when I just said ‘velocity of being’, I liked the sound of it.”  

The Unparalleled Wisdom of 28-Year-Old Carrie Fisher (Esquire, 1985)

Liking Newt would include...Part Two

Part One

Part Two

masterlist

-Behind Hugs
•this is when your both in the briefcase and
he’s writing something down and having a
difficult time so you go behind and hug him

-Him still being jealous that you have Pickett
•trying to take Pickett back
•Pickett sticking his tongue out
you sticking your tongue out

-Having to say goodbye to Jacob
•you being sad
•newt being sad
he’s actually more upset than
you

-On your way back to England
•holding hands
•scarf stealing
•playing with fingers

-Getting of the boat a finally being able to
“Breathe”
•because you get sea sick sometimes

-Loving the fact that you can actually use magic
in some parts of England
•lots of rain
•newt uses the fancy rain umbrella with his
wand
•shielding you from the rain
•"Newt, Im not going to melt"
•"Who knows, you’re a witch after all"
•laughing at his pathetic joke

-Getting back home
•hugging newt goodbye
•"You know you live next door right, I’ll see
you tomorrow"
•You still want to spend time with newt
•Your house being a mess
•sleeping on the couch

-Watching your favorite wizard movie
•actually mostly newt watching it
Because you fall asleep
•newt looking at your face in awe when
you sleep
that sounds kind of creepy..

-Both of you finally falling asleep
•hand tangled
And you don’t know that you both
like each other

people always say that its okay to not find a girlfriend for a long time bc its harder for us and thats true, but the thing is: if you do find one, and it doesnt go well, its okay. being sapphic doesnt mean that our relationships have to perfect. being sapphic doesnt mean that the first girl you find is gonna be your soulmate. sometimes things go wrong, and thats okay. it doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you. maybe it wasnt even youre fault. maybe it just wasnt meant to be. i know a lot of wlw who recently found out they’re sapphic feel really pressured about having a girlfriend. i do too. but that doesnt mean we have to like every sapphic girl we meet. it doesnt mean we have to like every girl that likes us. even if you really want to have a girlfriend, sometimes you just dont like someone, and thats okay. and sometimes you find someone and you break up after a while, and thats also okay. i feel like a lot of wlw have to hear this, but i dont see people taking about this.