Lacuna (4.18 Coda Fic)
At night, he dreams of her. A woman with lush, dark curls and a smile as piercing as a sun. He dreams of holding her, hearing her melodic laughter that makes his heart dance in his chest. He dreams of her pliant lips against his, a soft pull and push that makes him dizzy with want.
At night, he stays wide awake watching the moonlight filter in through the curtains, Ophelia’s arms wrapped tight around his midsection, as though she’s afraid he may drift away in the night. Sometimes he rolls over to gaze at her sharp features, feeling as though there isn’t something quite right about being with her…but then she’ll wake and give him a smile and he forgets about any of his misgivings.
In the lab, he can hear a woman with a British accent speaking in a humorous tone, often teasing him about something (“Is that so, Doctor Fitzy?”) but sometimes she speaks with a wobbly voice, as though it takes up all her strength to say anything at all (“Fitz, please just listen to me!”). It makes him smile to himself when she teases him, laughter echoing in her voice. His heart aches so badly when she sounds devastation that he sometimes wonders if this is what dying might feel like.