something to remember on daily basis


wednesday, december 13 — guess who is back?

it feels really great to finally be able to post something here!
im studying on a daily basis because my finals are literally from next week to the beginning of january, so once it starts, the hunger games start at the same time…
it is getting quite hard tbh, we have a shit-ton of finals, so many hard things to remember but at least everything is interesting (except one class)! trying my best to be as productive as possible, and trying me best to memorize every single thing…

really hope you are all doing great!
i am currently studying some chinese history before getting back to my chinese literature notes/translation notes🇨🇳
i am also currently watching an episode of Grey’s Anatomy at the same time because I need my brain to freaking relax for at least 45mins haha…

studygram/bookstagram: thomreads



Everyone, especially to all my American followers, this is a really serious issue that we ALL need to take action against!

Net Neutrality is about to be taken away, removing our freedom of browsing through the internet however and whenever we want by placing paywalls and having our every move watched. The way we access the Internet on a daily basis could very well be changed for the worst for the sake of satisfying the greed of companies and other people with power.

But the good news is that YOU can do something about it!

In the description below this video I’ve shared, there’s a heck-ton of information on this issue!

You can call your representatives, write letters to the FCC, and most importantly…VOTE!!! As well as many other things. But please remember to be civil when doing any or all of the above. They can listen to you less if you act emotionally, so please try your best to stay calm and be mature about all of this.

PLEASE SPREAD THIS POST AROUND! Let everyone and your fellow American users know what’s going on! This is a VERY serious issue that could possibly affect the whole world if other countries decide to follow suite, but we as a collective can stop it by using our voices and the tools I’ve mentioned above.

BPD feels.

Lack of emotional permanence. Everytime you feel something, even if its on a daily basis, it’s like its for the first time. “I’ve never hurt this much”, “i can’t remember feeling this angry”…

This is why our breakdowns are ever catastrophic. This is why we always think you’re gonna leave… Because to us, in that moment, it’s ‘never been that bad’… It doesnt matter how self aware you are. And the guilt that comes after? Intolerable. indescribable and completely overwhelming.

anonymous asked:

hi viria, i was wondering what brand/kind of make up do you use? i get so overwhelmed looking at youtube videos because it feels like you need a lot like foundation, concealer, powder, primer, etc. and i'm worried it'll look really obvious/bad but you make it look natural and subtle

on wwh, thank you!

Personally, I don’t feel like myself with heavy make up and I think it doesn’t quite suit me, so I’m happy to know what I do is liked by someone! 

But I feel like I might use a lot of stuff too? A year ago or so I happened to get myself into korean skincare/makeup, so ended up getting a bunch of stuff, mostly for skincare, but still. My foundation, highlighter, a few lip tints and blushes are from there. I think from what I use on a regular basis I only have loreal concealer and some cheet eyeshadows that are mass market. 

Generally tho, everything I have is mass market because cool things american youtubers use in their videos are. very. expensive here, so korean ones are good alternative for me. Like, usual maxfactor foundation probably costs around 200 grn, korean be a bit more expensive but I feel like the quality is a bit better would be around 200-400 w hile something like mac or nyx (and those are the most affordable) are 600 and up to 1500 or so…

ANYWAY! I drew a tutorial of what I tend to do on a regular basis as in my go to makeup! 

For step 2, I tend to use soothing/brightening cream right after I wash my face, so I don’t use it right before I do my make up (unless it’s sunscreen)

3. I LOVE BEING DEWY okay, I try to find the good balance between dewy and looking oily, but so far I think it works. My last fave is secret key tattoo cover cushion foundation, but I’m running out of it.. it’s what I used for the past 4 months or so. As for concealer, I use loreal with brush that you have to swirl to get the product out which I don’t remember how to call but it’s subtle, covers bags quite nicely and doesn’t look heavy:3

to be honest mostly I just use my blush as an eyeshadow..Unless i use something brownish. I don’t know the brands I have but they vere like 20 grn back in the day, so. very. cheap stuff.

as for lips, I mostly use matte or semi matte lipsticks or tints, they are easier to smudge and my hair doesn’t stick on it which is very important! 

Generally, from what I learnt, you don’t need a super excessive amount on a daily basis? I don’t have a single bronzer or contour palette or specified brow products and I only use what I have in eyeshadows for that. same ashy brown somehow looks nice as contour and as my eyebrow shadow.

I think it’s hard not to get overwhelmed at the amount of products a lot of people use in their videos, but…I’m not sure, maybe it’s just the quality of what I buy here, but I can’t say primer EVER changed anything for me. Like my foundation still lasts however long it can, with or without it. Or those fancy glowy or moistrusing essanses instagram beauties drop all over their faces, i’m not even sure what are those and how necessary those kinds of things are.

I guess focus more on the products you actually need instead of those people say you absolutely have to purchase.

I’m sorry I don’t know if it helps but I hope it does at least a little bit! 

PS I think there will be many typos and I’m sorry for them, but for some reason I can’t fix them without deleting every single letter in front of my typo:( tumblr text is hard

Carlos-Centric Descendants Prompt

(Alternate story line where only Mal, Evie and Jay were asked to go to Auradon and Carlos is left behind.)

Evie kisses his temple and grabs his shoulder, the heat of her fingers soaking through his sleeve. “We’ll be back as soon as we can,” she murmurs. “I promise.”

“I know.” And, logically, Carlos really does know that. He knows the plan and he knows how determined his friends are. It’s just hard to remember when he realizes he’ll be alone again.

“We get in, grab the wand, get out.” Jay recites on his other side. “Then we’re off of this place and free to go wherever.”

Carlos nods. He was alone before his friends and held his own just fine. He suffered through the bullies, the thieves, the villains. He suffered through Cruella by himself for years. He can do it again for a little bit.

Mal paces before them. “It’ll just be a couple of weeks.” She has her eyes closed and releases a shaky breath. Carlos has been worrying so much about himself that he didn’t stop to consider how his friends must feel about leaving their home and living under the threat of failing Maleficent. He’s scared for them all. He reaches for Mal’s hand and she looks at him. “And once it’s over with, everything gets better for all of us. You just have to wait for us.”

So Carlos does.

Following the book, none of the Rotten Four were friends until about a year before the movie (feel free to change how long they’ve been friends), so Carlos spent most of his life alone and fending for himself and it’s mentioned that he was picked on quite a bit.

But life on the island has to be better with a group of friends watching out for you, right? Carlos has formed emotional attachments to these people and he has to people to confide in and help him, hooray!

Until Prince Ben’s proclamation goes out and he picks three Isle kids to come live in Auradon - Mal, Jay and Evie, who have to leave behind their youngest friend. Carlos just has to make it a couple of months without them because they totally promise they’re not abandoning him and we’re not gonna leave you behind, Carlos, you know that, right?

So, he stays on the Island, returning to facing the horrors of the Isle on his own. He just has to wait for his friends to take down the barrier.

Following the movie, that doesn’t happen. Mal, Evie and Jay still choose good at the end and still return the wand and Maleficent is still a lizard and Carlos watches it all on tv with the parents. His friends look happy and healthy and safe and that’s all he ever wanted for them. Mal swore she would come back for him, Jay said he would protect him, Evie just told him to wait and hey, it looks like they’re all on good terms with the new king, Ben, so maybe Carlos will still get off the Isle afterall!

Except, he doesn’t.

More time passes and there’s no word from any of his best friends - no visits, no letters, no contact at all.

Maybe they’re all too caught up in their new lives to remember him or maybe they were never actually friends. Time passes and Carlos remains on the Isle of the Lost, running around with murderers, rapists and thieves and the worst of them all - his mother. Sure, he gets his ass kicked on a daily basis and he’s angry, hurt and confused (Why did they leave him behind? Have the forgotten about him? Did he do something wrong? Is he too dirty for Auradon?). But he survives.

Another year passes and Carlos is finally called to Auradon (does he go with the second wave of VKs or do his friends finally remember to send for him?). How does he adapt to this new environment on his own? What will Carlos do when he sees his former friends, who have actually changed to be good? Jay’s not stealing, Mal’s not threatening and Evie’s not gossiping - he didn’t even know that was possible.

On top of it all, how does Carlos function around his friends who abandoned him on Hell on Earth?

Note: This has been kicking in my head for forever but I have way too many projects to start this. Still, if anyone is interested, I have quite a few ideas for it all and I’d love to read Mal, Evie and Jay feeling guilty and Carlos not understanding why he was left behind. I also love Carlos paired with pretty much anyone and Carlos/Jay/Evie/Mal is a wonderfully complex relationship.

Let me know if anyone wants to fill this, I’d be so excited to read!


“We live in a world where billions are spent on physical health and appearance. But yet, mental health and well-being, which are the most important factors that keep all of us moving forward and something that should be given the same level of care and attention as physical health, get ignored and pushed to the side time to time again. I know we would love to look in the mirror and love to see what we see. Sometimes I struggle on a daily basis to see that, but I know that when I look inside my mind, I know that I am happy with where I am at and that’s the most important thing. We need to remember that is so much more important to take care of our mind and our mental health rather than our physical health.”  —  Demi Lovato accepting the Artistic Award of Courage onstage during UCLA Semel Institute’s ‘Open Mind Gala’.

Hello Louies!

With this post, I’d like to introduce you to Project #BacktoLou! 

We’ve seen a lot of nice messages/confessionals of fans on how Louis has been a beacon of light, a safe place, or an inspiration to them. We’d love to collect them, and get these personal stories to Louis. He can read them whenever he’s having a bad day, to remember him that just by being himself, he’s always been - and always will be - a bright, extraordinary light in the world to us. 

This way, we can give him back something that he gives so freely to all of us on a daily basis - happiness. 

We’re in touch with Key 103, as we’d ideally like to get the collection back to Louis at this gig (Nov. 9th). If you’d like to contribute your story - be it publicly or anonymously - you can submit it to us on this blog! We want to collect as much stories as possible up until the end of October. 

If you have any questions, please send us an ask :) 

We’ll keep track of the tag #projectbacktolou as well, both here and on Twitter, where you can find us at @projectbacktoLT

Why We Broke Up (angst, fluff)

Anonymous: hello! can i request for a jaebum scenario where his ex (Y/N) and him met again after few months disappearing and their feeling started growing again. sorry for bad english!

Title: Why We Broke Up (Jaebum)
Genre: Angst, Fluff
A/N: Asfghj! Jaebum is just so hot and cute and beautiful! He bias wrecks my list on a daily basis! Enjoy!

p.s. I’m using photos instead of gifs for now because I’m away from home and the internet here isn’t all too well. 

i said i’d be using photos but look at this! credits to the owner, please message me so that i can put your username.

Backspace. You click it again. Type something up then repeatedly press it. Backspace. You do this for a good thirty minutes, staring at the big white screen then at the empty mug beside it.

You remember the past months where your fingers used to rapidly type on the keyboard, words and stories would flow out of it and your friends and teachers would nod in awe and appreciation. You remembered when he used to fill the empty mug beside your laptop. When he used to massage your back. When he used to cover your face with tiny kisses, whining for you to go to sleep.

Tears escape your eyes, slowly trickling down from your cheek to your shirt. You don’t bother to wipe it. You’re alone anyway. You remember that night. Jaebum had come home late and he had also forgotten the date he had promised you. The date that had you ordering water over and over again, annoying the staff. The date that had given you time to reflect on things. And when Jaebum came home, you exploded. You couldn’t help it. He couldn’t either.

You called him irresponsible. He called you a nagging clingy girl. You called him shit. He called you bitch. It was a tennis match of insults and anger. Both of you knew the words spewing from your lips were words to regret. Both of you knew but none of you stopped until he said, “Why did I even have to date you in the first place?”

It sent a metallic taste in your mouth as anger, hurt and sadness boiled inside you. You threw the nearest thing–a picture frame–beside you, “Get out, Im Jaebum! Get out!”

He huffed at you, holding back the tears and pleas, and slammed the door shut.

Your sobs have increased, drawing in sharp breaths from you as you failed to compose yourself. Your fist wipes your tears as you mutter stupid over and over again. It’s been months but you haven’t really gotten over him. Backspace. Backspace.

Jaebum hums as he looks down at the list of groceries he had to buy for the dorm. He contemplates whether avoiding meat for a week would do good for them or not. Without looking he reaches for the nearby carton of milk when he feels fingers graze his. Jaebum turns to look up and sees you. Suddenly, all of his worries had disappeared, replaced with the pacing of his heart. Even after five months, you still made his heart go jumbled along with his thoughts.

“Sorry,” Jaebum speaks up first, giving the word a double meaning. You only shake your head and give a small smile, “It’s okay.”

I want you back. I miss you, you wanted to say.

Both of you just stop and stare at each other, the past replaying in each other’s eyes. The two years filled with good and bad memories. The relationship both of you missed so much.

“I, uh, have to go,” you nervously bite your lip as you slowly steered your cart away, hoping that he would do something to make you stop.

“Y/N,” Jaebum speaks out and you try to make it less obvious that you were more than happy to turn back to him.


“Can we…can we be friends?” Jaebum spits out and your heart doesn’t know whether to crash or to leap with joy.

You sceptically looked at him. You missed him. You missed the sound of his laughter. You missed the forehead kisses he gives you. You missed every inch of him. Still, can you and him be friends?

You shrug, trying to look casual when you’re actually excited and all, “I guess so.”

“Cool.” Jaebum hides his excitement too, biting his cheeks to manage his face muscles that were threatening to stretch his lips into a grin.


“Well, uh, see you around, friend…buddy!” Jaebum awkwardly says and raises his fist, passer-bys looking strangely at him. You laugh at Jaebum’s loss of composure and his heart flutters just by seeing you smile and hearing your laugh.

“See you, sometime,” you smile, leaving with your cart, forgetting the carton of milk. It didn’t matter anyway, you could buy someday and maybe bump into him again.

Jaebum waits until you’re clearly out of sight before jumping and raising his fist, “Yes!” He couldn’t help but think it was two years ago again.

It’s been a month since both of you started becoming friends, surprising a number of friends. Your writer’s block has melted already sending your fingers flying across the keyboard again. Jaebum and you would spend a lot of walks outside and movie nights on Fridays. Life felt much easier with him around. Both of you were learning ever part of each other like they’ve never heard of it. Each information was sacred. Your favourite colour, his favourite book, favourite music…It was like two years ago when both of you barely knew each other, awkward spaces filling in the gaps.

Still, even with all the positive outcomes with your friendship, one couldn’t help but accidentally recall the past. One of you might actually blurt out that time when they were on a date at the amusement park or when you the place where you both had your first kiss…first ‘I Love You’s. It was inevitable and left you to the uncertainty of being together again. The fear of why you both broke up, coming back to haunt the two of you.

“Where are you going?” Jaebum says as he lies down your bed while you stare at your figure on the mirror. You were wearing a light blue dress and smelled like lavenders when Jaebum arrived. He quizzically looked at you and arched an eyebrow.

You sigh as you reapplied and erased a lipstick, “My friend set me up for a blind date, Jaebum. Try new things and see other people, she said. And…well, he sounded, um, ideal.”

Jaebum fell silent. Was he too late? Have you actually moved on? His heart clenched at the thought of you in another man’s arms. Your smile dedicated to someone who’s not him. Another guy doing the things he used to.

Jaebum couldn’t let you go, he was too selfish to do so.

Don’t go,” Jaebum sat up and stared at your reflection, your lipstick goes up, marring your cheek.

“What?” you wipe the lipstick with the back of your hand.

“I said don’t go, Y/N.” Jaebum stands up and you feel your heart go wild at the serious Jaebum.


“I like you too much, Y/N. I love you and I miss you and now you’re going to leave me,” he says. “And life’s so difficult without you, you know. No more laughter, no more smiles, no more sounds of the keyboard. No more you. And all I want to do is just hold you and just kiss you. I don’t want you to disappear. I didn’t…didn’t mean what I said a while back.”

You felt like that too. Empty without Jaebum. He seemed to bring colours into your life. And you missed him so so much. You still loved him, your heart aching at the thought of him. You drew in a sharp breath, “I know.”

“Y/N, don’t go.” Jaebum holds your wrist and you sink into his touch.

You closed your eyes and sighed, kicking off your heels to the side, surprising Jaebum, “Fine. What do I tell him? That I’m sick?”

“Yeah…” Jaebum grins at you. “…with chicken pox?”

“Perfect.” you smile and Jaebum immediately envelopes you into a hug, burying his head into your hair, inhaling the lavenders.

His forehead meets yours, both of your breathing intensifying, “I’m so sorry, Y/N. I mean it. It’s shitty without you. I don’t want to ever let you go again.”

“Me either.“

A Breach of Trust: Chapter 16

(Act 1: Chapter 1-9 )

(Act 2: Chapter 10 || Chapter 11 || Chapter 12 || Chapter 13 || Chapter 14 || Chapter 15 || Chapter 15.5 || Chapter 16 || Chapter 17 || Chapter 18)

(Act 3 Chapter 19+)

At 3:30, Reigen was standing tenth in line to check out at the grocery store nearest his apartment. He stared forward, glaze-eyed, through the ceiling-high windows decorating the front of the store. Rain clouds had gathered as a thick and dreary coat. The parking lot adopted their gray tint, and the air had turned dense with the spiking humidity, the crackling electricity. A storm was rolling through.

Not inside though. Inside the store was temperate, dry, perhaps just a bit too cold. Inside was bathed in the whiteness of fluorescent lights, and smothered in a silence broken only by the steady blip of a scanner running across grocery items. It lulled Reigen into a daze. Or maybe it just made him aware of it. If he were being honest with himself, the dazed feeling had been eating his brain for a good number of hours. That was easier than fully understanding the responsibility he had taken on. But it also made his memories of the day feel more like dreams, or plans, or thoughts. What had he done since the morning?

The line moved forward. Reigen shuffled with them.


The morning. …The morning had been quiet. The kind of dense and safe quiet that came with waking before the sun was even up. The kind that came with knowing he was likely the only soul awake in the apartment complex, soft socked feet scuffling across the floor above the heads of the sleeping.

Well one of the only souls, plural. That included Mob.

Keep reading

almost something (M)

Park Jimin. 5 213 words. Brother’s best friend AU.

But you certainly were an almost –almost something.

You didn’t really hate him at first, in fact, the first thought that crossed your mind when you saw him was hot with a capital H because who’d knew the friend your brother was bringing home for semester break was this cute with lush lips, adorable crescent eyes when he smiled, pale skin that flushed whenever you teased him a tad too much and boy, was he toned –bless whatever reason that made him wear the sleeveless grey hoodie that gave you a glorious view of his biceps flexing when he stopped right in front of you on the doorsteps and shrugged his bag up to reposition the bag on his back.

Keep reading

Guardian (II)

Author: kpopfanfictrash

Pairing: You / Jongdae / Baekhyun

Rating: PG 

Word Count: 2,735

Summary:  You keep seeing the same guy everywhere you go. In the coffee shop, on the streets, in your philosophy class. It’s getting to the point where you think he’s stalking you - only to realize that maybe there’s something much more mysterious at play here. (AU: Chen is your guardian angel)

Originally posted by galaxychen

Keep reading

Shayde | 1

Pairing: Yoongi x Reader 

Word Count:  3,388

Genre & Warnings: Angels & Demons AU. There will be a little bit of everything in here. 

A/N: Don’t forget that with Y/N type fics, you can use the interactive fics chrome extension to fill it in with a name of your choice. 

Summary: Whenever a human is born, they are automatically assigned a guardian angel. And Lucifer, not to be outdone, assigned the child a “guardian demon” as well. Twenty-four years ago, a baby girl was born and was assigned her guardians. Bright, energetic Hoseok as her angel. And Yoongi; a demon so apathetic that guiding her down a bad road was too much work for him. After Guardian Hoseok goes missing, Yoongi and his charge must team up to find their hope.

Nothing had been going right for you in so long.

The skies were gray, food turned to ash in your mouth…OK, maybe you were being a bit dramatic, but it certainly felt that way. 

Your life had always been fairly steady and uneventful. You were the youngest child of an average, middle-class family. You made decent enough grades to pass high school and were now studying nursing, a major your father said was more stable than music. You had great friends, a decent apartment, and enough money to satisfy your basic needs.

So why were you suddenly feeling like this? 

Keep reading

Stercus Accidit

We normally wouldn’t post our own writing here, as it goes against our rules, but today we’re making an exception.  This is our co-written contribution to the @xfficchallenges dialogue only challenge.  We may or may not have gotten a little drunk last night, and this is the result.  We hope you think it’s as hilarious as we did, because we couldn’t stop laughing.

Authors: @kateyes224 and @piecesofscully
Timeline: Season 6, somewhere in the middle of Texas.
Rated: PG-13 (for coarse language and potty humor)

“…and my informant promised me he’d meet us at the rendezvous with the photographs he took of the UFO.  I’m really excited about this, Scully, this is the first legitimate sighting I’ve come across since Antarctica, and I just…Scully, are you okay?  You’re not looking super hot.”

“I’m fine. Just feeling a little queasy.  Keep going; since Antarctica?”

“Oh, since Antarctica there have been only a half dozen or so sightings that have been anywhere near legitimate, and I’ve been thinking, would someone in Roswell, New Mexico, be more likely or less-”

“Mulder, does the air conditioning go any higher?”

“Uh, no, I think it’s at the highest setting.  Anyway, Roswell has been a notorious hotbed for UFO activity since the 1940s, as you know, but lately sightings have been more sporadic-”

“Can you, um, oh wow, could you roll down the window or something?”

“Scully, it’s like 115 degrees outside.  It’s way cooler inside the car than it is outside.  Is something wrong?”

“No! No, I just, is it hot in here? It feels really hot in here.  How many more miles until we reach the next rest area?”

“Uhhh, I think I remember a sign about fifty miles back that said it’d be another fifty miles.  Why?  Are you okay, Scully?”

“Do you have any Tums?  I mean, with the garbage that you consume on a daily basis, I assume you carry some sort of antacids.  Give me one.”

“I’m sorry, Scully, I don’t usually need them.  I’ve, uh, I’ve been blessed with kind of a rock solid gut.  Which is really great for me, given my proclivity for gas station sushi and Velveeta.”

“Oh, my God.  It’s rolling.”

“What does that even mean?”

“It’s my…wow, it’s my stomach.  I knew I shouldn’t have let you talk me into that wet chimichanga, Mulder, my stomach is churning.”

“Oh.  Oh God.  Ummm…do you need me to pull over?”

“On the side of the road?!  No, Mulder, there’s nothing but sand and tumbleweeds out here!  Just keep driving.”

“Scully, it’s okay.  There’s no shame in popping a squat.  I promise I won’t look.  I think we have some napkins in the glove compartment or something…”

“Mulder, please, I’m begging you, stop talking and drive faster.”

“Okay.  So our informant allegedly has some kind of intel from a source on Sheppard Air Force Base’s drone project, which Langly told me a few months ago has been-”

“Oh, God, please shut up.  I need to concentrate- oh my god, Mulder, why won’t my window roll down?  My button’s stuck, Mulder, roll my window down.”

“Sorry, Scully, I think the child proof window lock was engaged.  Here, let me see if I can…there, is that a little better?  It’s still over a hundred degrees outside, Scully, I’m not sure why you-”

“For the love of all things holy, stop talking! I need quiet and the wind in my…Mul- Mulder, pull on my sleeve.  I need to take my blazer- Oh, God, now it’s coming in waves…”

“Here, just give me your arm.  There, is that a little better?  What do you mean, ‘it’s coming in waves?’  You’re looking really red, Scully, are you sure you’re okay?”

“How is there not a rest stop for another fifty miles?  What kind of hell state has rest stops so far apart?  Okay, okay, wait.  It’s getting better, I think it’s going away.”

“What’s going away?  Scully…is there something you need to tell me?”

“No, I’m fine.  I don’t think that Tex-Mex agreed- Oh, God. Oh, no. Shit, Mulder, you need to pull over.  Now, right now.  Pull over, pull over.”

“Scully, there’s nothing but desert as far as they eye can see.  Are you sure you can’t wait?”

“I, um, holy sonofabitch.  Now, Mulder, pull over now!  It’s imminent.”

“Imminent?!  Jesus, Scully, there’s…uh, I guess there’s a cactus over there that might offer you some protection?”

“It feels like there’s a brick with claws sitting in my lower abdomen.  I don’t care, pull the damn car over, and give me the napkin!”

“A brick with claws? Jesus, Scully, that’s…graphic.  Hey, I think I remember an X-File about that, ha. Okay, I can tell you’re not in the mood to joke right now, so, uh…listen, we haven’t passed another car for the last ten miles so I don’t think anyone will-”

“THE NAPKIN! Mulder, give me the damn napkin!”

“Do you want me to get it a little wet, Scully?  ‘Cause that might feel a little better on your…”

“I’ll, uh, I’ll be right back-”

“Okay, Scully, vaya con Dios!  Or, ya know, vaya con…ya know…whatever. Just let me know if you need any, uh, you know…help…or…something.”

“…Oh my god, please no, please no, just a little further.  Just get behind the cactus, Dana…I, shit.  Shit!  Oh, God, Mulder.  Mulder!”

“SCULLY!  Hold on, I’ll be right there!  Just let me-!”

“It’s the spines on the cactus, I can’t hold on to it.  Just… my hand.  Hurry, I need you to hold my hand.”

“Okay, no problem.  Um…Here, just squat down and I’ll support your weight..”

“Don’t look at me! Mulder, do NOT look at me, turn around!  Oh, God, I can’t hold it…”

“It’s okay, I’ve got you, Scully.  Just, uh…there.  Just rest back on your ankles.  I’m not looking, I swear to God.  Just let it go, Scully.”

“God, I swear, I will never touch Tex-Mex again if you- oh God, oh my god, Mulder, don’t listen. Can you sing or something?”

“Sing?!  Okay, ummm…

‘Love…is a burning thing…
And it makes a fiery ring.
Bound by wild desire,
I fell into, a ring of fire…’ ”

“The Ring of Fire? Really, Mulder?”

“I fell into a burning ring of fire,
I went down, down, down,
And the flames went higher,
And it burns, burns, burns,
The ring of fire…the ring of fire…”

“Shitshitshit… Um, Mulder, the napkin…it’s, uh, it’s not enough.”

“What?  Uh, wow, okay…well I don’t have any Kleenex or anything so unless you want me to give you my tie I don’t think-”

“Your tie, give me your tie.”

“Scully, no. I was only joking, and besides, I love this tie!  Frohike gave me this tie.”

“Mulder, just give me the damn tie!”

“Fine. But you know what, you owe me, Scully. And you get to explain this to Melvin when he asks why I never wear my UFO tie anymore.”

“Mulder, we are never to speak of this again.  And, for the love of God, stop humming Ring of Fire.”

Hunk HCs

★ He’s completely deaf, so he has hearing aids and is Really good at reading lips

★ He also uses ASL and Lance learned it in secret to surprise him and Hunk cried

★ Has a huge fear of spiders

★ Lance found him in their dorm once screaming and throwing random shoes at the wall

★ Makes so many sarcastic comments under his breath he gives Pidge a run for their money

★ Is judging you anytime of the day

★ He got into puns because of his mom 

  • It helps him remember her while he’s up in space

★ Watched chopped on a daily basis and screamed s o m u c h

★ Once made a self sustaining tornado to help Lance prank Iverson

★ He had a dog named Sunny back on Earth

★ Can roast anyone if the piss him off enough

  • He did it once and Lance still hasn’t recovered

★ Anyone who has ever said something bad about Lance is on his shit-list for life

★ Has watched every Bill Nye episode in existence

★ Is insanely good at monopoly

★ Was forced to watch his younger sister attempt to flip a gallon of milk  

★ His hair was actually pretty long before he got the Garrison

  • He used his headband as a hair tie

★ Knows all the gossip at any given time

  • People just trust him like that

★ My beautiful trans son

★ Realizes that anyone color coded characters with Red and Blue end up together and is just waiting for Keith and Lance to continue the tradition

★ Will not get 5 ft within an Ouija Board

  • He’s watched too many movies to take his chances with that shit

★ Meditates because he’s done with Lance’s tomfoolery

  • “Just take deep breaths and try not to lock him in a closet Hunk”

Hunk, shortly after Lance does something stupid: Mm

  • Lance: whAT DOES THAT MEAN

Hunk, through tears: I am one with the force the force is with me, I am one with the force the force is with me, I am o–

★ Had plenty of secret admirers at any given school he went to

★ Took apart his tv once and somehow made it better?

★ Tiana is his favorite Disney princess

When something bad happens to someone he strongly dislikes: Oh no, how could this have happened…..I do hope they recover…..

★ Favorite musical is 22 Chump Street

  • He felt soooo bad for Justin

★ Duct tape has saved his life on many occasions

★ He has really bad anxiety and to cope he messes with random objects


★ Could be found harmonizing with his siblings

  • He finds out Keith can sing and demands a jam session

★ He has two moms sorry I don’t make the rules

  • Also has 2 sisters and a brother

★ Can out bench press Zarkon

★ Started learning Altean with pidge because why not

★ Licked Shiro’s arm in the name of Science™

★ Master of all languages

  • Okay not all but it’s Enough

★ Had the opportunity to earn an associates degree in Engineering while in High School

★ Texted with punctuation back on earth and lance was,,,,,Disgusted

  • He just wants to make sure no one misunderstands him

★ Learns the lyrics to “Two-Player Game” from Be More Chill with Lance

★ He has a forest near his house that he always goes in

★ Was in Color Guard before he went to the Garrison

  • He’s reached the Max Flexibilty

I have the write this down before I forget about it, because I really do think it’s important to think about, and it doesn’t really get talked about a lot.

So, I’ve been playing a lot of mobile games lately, and for a few weeks it started really messing with my ability to get up and do the things I needed to do- cutting into my executive function and taking away my willingness to actually get up and go.

And cutting back on them has made me re-gain consciousness about these sort of things, and how a lot of  ND people genuinely have to be extremely cautious of how much of anything that they do on a daily basis, and just how tiring it can get to fight the things that prey on your natural leaning towards various unhealthy behaviors and habits.

It made me remember how a majority of NT people will never understand how exhausting it can get having to moderate everything you do in your daily life out of fear something may turn into a maladaptive coping mechanism or addictive behavior due to mental/physical illness and/or disability making your brain pre-disposed to one or both of the above.

And when I mean everything, I mean everything, it’s not just drugs and alcohol.
It’s food. It’s sugar. It’s caffeine.
It’s exercise. It’s work. It’s school.
It’s fun activities like video games or sports.

We have to be extremely consious of everything we do and everything we put into our bodies- we have to be hyper aware of how much we’re taking in and how much we should be taking in to make sure we’re doing everything in moderation. And it’s exhausting sometimes.

Studying Japanese

Was writing up this post for something on reddit, but I figured some people might find it useful here. This is basically my “Japanese Studying” history condensed into survey form. I often get asked how I got started and how I learned and this is basically of summary of how I go about it along with some advice I would give people looking back at my own experience.

1. Out of 10, roughly how skilled are you in the following areas (1 is absolute beginner and 10 is native level fluency):   

Speaking: 7    Listening: 8    Reading: 9    Writing: 7    Grammar: 9

2. How long have you been studying Japanese? 4.5 Years. 2 in college, got good grades but only studied with an aim of doing well on the tests. The rest has been as primarily an Elementary/Kindergarten ALT in somewhat rural Japan, a fairly immersive setting where I don’t really have any coworkers who can speak anything beyond rudimentary English.

3. What’s your Japanese vocabulary?

15k+ I’d say.

4. Why are you learning Japanese? I want to achieve near fluency and be able to use Japanese alongside my business/economics degree (and hopefully a future MBA) in the business world.

5. What resources do you use to study? I use Anki for an hour+ every day while writing everything down with a pencil and paper except for the most basic kanji and the hiragana/katakana-only words.

I used the first two text books in the Yokoso! Series in college. Pretty good.

The only textbook I have used in Japan is the Minna no Nihongo Intermediate II Textbook at a local volunteer 日本語教室. It was also good. Nowadays I mostly read newspaper articles there.

I am a big fan of the Kanken (漢字検定) exams because they expose you to lots of useful kanji, sentences, idioms, and opposite pairs that you might not otherwise see in textbooks made for foreigners. I just study the practice exam books, putting everything I don’t know how to write or read into a Anki deck. In 2 years I have been able to work my way up from level 8 to level 3 and am currently studying for the pre-2 and level 2 exams.

I am fortunate (for my career and language goals) to work in a place where basically the only English I speak is with my elementary students in class every week. All my work/meetings at school are conducted in Japanese, I make my lesson plans in Japanese, and while I do my best to expose my students to English and international culture, all my time spent playing at recess, eating lunch, or volunteering afterschool is pretty much free Japanese practice time with eager conversational partners.

I am a fan of Japanese Vocaloid music and for the past few years my hobby has been translating and subbing Vocaloid songs and videos for foreign fans to enjoy. You can find some of my work by looking up “descentsubs” on YT but unless you are into anime-type stuff you might not find it interesting at all.

I am also in an English Novel Translation group. We slowly translate novels (currently Animal Farm) into Japanese.  I am the “English Advisor”, helping with English metaphors, idoms, colloquial sayings, and archaic grammar, and the Japanese members correct my translations which is really helpful because while I have improved enough to not actually make many actual mistakes anymore, my Japanese writing is not at all “natural” so I get tons of advice on how actual Japanese people would reword the translations I create.

6. How many hours per week do you actively spend studying?

Anki and Kanken studying usually adds up to about 14 hours a week. I spend a good 4-5 hours on my translating hobby, a few hours reading, and another 3-4 hours at my Japanese class or Translation circle each week. As long as you have a smartphone/dictionary near you, anytime can be study time though.

7. Do you tend to focus more on reading & writing, or speaking and listening?

I have to do all 4 of them currently for my job, but listening and reading are the most important. People can still largely understand you if you write or speak poorly (and I make plenty of minor mistakes every time I open my mouth) but there are no “easy documents” or “easy meetings/lectures/conversations” in the workplace, you either got to know it or you don’t when the moment comes. My solution to dealing with this is to focus on increasing my vocabulary over everything else with grammar given secondary priority.

8. What country do you live in?

Fukushima, Japan

10. Any final words for beginners and fellow /r/learnjapanese folk?
-Lots of people talk about how things like Kanken or JLPT aren’t real indicators of Japanese fluency and they are not, but what they are is excellent goals to help keep yourself motivated and honest as you move forward.

-Anki is an amazing program. It really works and if you stick with it every day you see real results. I only started using it 1.5 years ago and I regret that greatly. Back them I was between N2-N3 in level from accumulated experience, but once I started digesting some essential lists (JLPT N3, N2, N1 Kanji/Vocab lists, the Japan Elementary School kanji list, Core 6000) my life changed in a huge way. I was able to functionally (if slowly and painstakingly at times) read basically everything in my daily life and work environment. I finally started understanding enough Japanese to better know what I DIDN’T know. I could listen to a conversation or read something and understand it to the point that I could easily begin to realize things like “oh, I didn’t catch that one word” or “what is the nuance of that grammar he just used?”. That is when you really start getting on the path towards functional fluency.

-To go along with the last point, BUILD YOUR VOCABULARY (語彙力)! Until at least the N3 level I do think it is important to go along with a textbook like Genki or Minna no Nihongo to help understand the fundamentals of Japanese grammar and build a good base that will allow you to move forward into advanced levels. But once you are able to process the majority of basic grammar forms, pure vocab and kanji rapidly outpaces the usefulness of the grammar points you will encounter in high level textbooks and study materials, even for N2 and N1. While I may hear (or poorly try to use) something like ~ざるを得ない or 揚げ句 once a week, I am constantly bombarded with vocab from even my youngest elementary students (including bug, flower, food, and objects names) that really strains my memory because I don’t have the same life experiences as them. The only way to make up for that lack of experience is to STUDY YOUR ASS OFF! This doesn’t mean you don’t study grammar, but rather from the intermediate level on you should mostly look up grammar when you don’t understand something, don’t waste time studying chapters full of expressions that you may almost never use. Let your real experiences start to dictate what grammar you look up, learn, remember, and use. I never studied grammar by rote for either N2 or N1 and passed just fine using this approach.

-Finally, the only thing that will make these last 2 points worth your time is to find a way to apply your Japanese on a daily basis. Read books, read manga, watch anime, find conversation partners, translate songs, move to Japan, whatever. Anki and drilling are effective but what they really do is get things floating around in your head that are now ready to make a real life connection and be truly remembered. Pretty much every difficult word or phrase I have been able to learn and make my own to use in daily conversation over the past few years has started with memorizing in Anki and THEN encountering it once or twice in conversation or reading, having that A-HA! moment, and finally grasping what it really means. Whether you are in Japan or not, this “application”-phase of Japanese study can take all kinds of forms, just find something that suits your interests. I’m not a big anime fan but I disagree with some people who say “anime doesn’t teach you real Japanese”. If you approach anime or manga with a “I want to understand everything approach” and not just remember words like “senpai”, “dokidoki”, and “kawaii” you will learn and progress. It really doesn’t matter, just find SOME way to live and experience Japanese constantly.

-(For advanced learners) Once I got far along enough in Japanese to make heads and tails of my daily life over here, I couldn’t shake the ever present desire to want to understand EVERYTHING and not be perplexed by things Japanese people do without second thought. I am constantly looking up stuff I encounter. See a sign you can’t read completely? Look it up. Listening to your drunk boss ramble on at the enkai about stuff you don’t care about? Look it up while doing あいずち. Stuck at a meeting or event that doesn’t really apply to you? Silently aim for 100% comprehension trying to jot down every word that you didn’t understand. You won’t be able to do this all the time, but when life or work allows it, turn parts of everyday life into listening or reading exercises. This “looking up” habit is similar to using Anki; it primes your brain and breeds familiarity, just waiting for your next encounter with a newly learned word or phrase to cement it into your memory. Chances are that if it is worth remembering and you continue to watch the same kinds of shows or work in the same workplace it WILL come up again.

-Language is a never-ending process. Learning it is also progresses extremely unevenly when approaching the language as an outsider who didn’t grow up immersed in the culture. After these few years of hard work, I can show my elementary school students how to write any kanji or phrase in their homework, I can out-do the middle schoolers in town for the most part as well, I can dazzle adults with my knowledge of 四字熟語 but in the end, I am not native and never will be. I’m still not anywhere remotely close. All I need to do to prove it is open my mouth for a few seconds and speak Japanese. But it doesn’t matter. Learning this language has provided me with all kinds of amazing human connections, wonderful memories, and a new outlook on my future life and goals after years of fighting depression through college. Good luck and keep grinding!

Caffeinated Hearts

Hello, I’m back again with more self indulgent garbage!

Ignis Scientia/Reader, SFW, 5521 words. Reader’s gender is not specified and no pronouns are used for them.

When the little coffee shop you work at starts serving Ebony products, you start bringing in more customers, including a tall, exceptionally polite man who grabs your attention from the start.

Little do you know, he’s interested too.

Tagging my fellow Ignis lovers: @singergurl91 @hypaalicious @strikecommandher @thirdstreetcettin @misssarahdoll @themissimmortal @tehrevving @roses-and-oceans

Read on AO3 here:

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How to Support Someone With PTSD/C-PTSD

***This also applies to people who are supporting those diagnosed with DESNOS or trauma-based disorders***

Be patient. This is the first step to being a strong foundation for someone with this ailment; it can take days, months or years for the one you love to open up about what happened, express general emotions or even leave the home. When you show that you are patient with them in every way, you are showing them that you love them through thick and thin.

Educate yourself about PTSD/C-PTSD. This can be said about any learning disability, physical disability, mental health issue or neurodiverse diagnosis. Go to support groups, do your research and ask questions to specialists. Most importantly, ask the individual you are supporting if they are willing to explain how they are impacted on a daily basis. Please note that not every sufferer will want to elaborate further.

Do “normal”/conventional things with them. It sounds a little overdone, but people with this disorder have gone through anything but a stable surrounding, environment or event. Taking them to a movie, a walk in the park, out to the beach, for a picnic, to dinner or lunch, social event, etc. will show them that they are deserving of something more than the trauma they’ve been through. 

Be accepting about unsaid/mixed feelings. Remember, it’s really challenging for a majority of people with this disorder to completely vocalize what they’ve been through. It takes a lot of time, specifically for people with C-PTSD, to express their feelings because sometimes they just can’t find the right words to explain it. 

Learn to be an attentive listener. I’ll be making a post about this in the near future. Ask the right questions without accusing language such as, “WHY do you feel ______.” Instead try an alternative such as, “What about _____ is making you feel _______?”. Try to avoid saying “everything will be okay” or generally invalidating their feelings. When you invalidate someone’s feelings, they ultimately feel like they can’t trust you and that you don’t take their feelings seriously.

Minimize stress at home - aim to make the home as comfortable as possible. The last thing someone suffering with a trauma-based illness needs is instability within their home life. Give them time to relax and decompress from the daily stresses.  

Create structure/routine in every day life. Someone who has been through trauma (typically) craves structure and consistency in order to remember that they have control over their lives. Having a set routine helps restore a sense of self-empowerment and security in the person dealing with their trauma-based struggles.

Encourage their strengths and talents. This will help the sufferer see through a different lense; a lense that shows them their ability, especially their capability of recovering and moving forward. The more someone grows from their talents, the closer they are to establishing and strengthening their sense of self again.

(Intimate relationships) Assure them that you are there for them and love them regardless of their illness. When you tell the person you love that their illness does not define them and that your love transcends beyond that, their trust will rebuild. Abandonment issues are rampant in those with trauma-based illnesses (although at the same time, sufferers get in modes of prolonged self-isolation). The more you assure them and show it through your actions, the more that trust rebuilds and they are less likely to become co-dependent.

Help them make new, happy memories. The last thing someone with PTSD/C-PTSD/DESNOS/etc. wants to think about is the past. Making new memories will help them move forward and start enjoying their new life.

Learn about the person’s triggers and stressors. Yes, they are different. In short, “a trigger is a symptomatic reaction from one of the five senses (sight, sound, touch, taste and smell) based only upon a direct connection to an actual traumatic event experienced,” while “a stressor is something that creates an increase in adrenaline that then triggers your internal stress response mechanism…Think iceberg of emotions: a buildup of negative emotion which peaks to a response, usually anger.“ (both courtesy of The more you become in tune with what is problematic to the person, the better you will get at navigating communication, help and support.

Be compassionate in how you approach things. It can be hard as the world tells us frequently to harden up; when you’re supporting someone who has suffered from trauma, yelling could be a stressor. Certain sayings can cause a downward spiral (especially if the perpetrator said those things verbatim, or the saying could be related to an event that the sufferer has gone through). Compassion is vital and lets the person know that they can trust you and continue to move forward.

Allow the person to talk about the past. Without saying, “Stop living in the past”. As mentioned in my previous post about what NOT to say to someone with PTSD/C-PTSD, that is an extremely invalidating and belittling thing to say to someone; sometimes the sufferer needs to talk about it in order to further their recovery.

Understand that trauma changes people. Once you can grasp that trauma really changes people and how they react to things, you can then begin to learn how to approach the person with a compassionate scope.

Know that identity confusion/issues are a common response with people who have trauma-based illnesses, especially in CSA survivors. It can take a lot of therapy and time for the dissociation and identity issues to subside; when you get more educated about trauma-specific illnesses, you’ll notice that this comes up a lot. Responding to someone who is confused about their identity, at that point in time, requires assurance. Telling them that you support their decisions and approaching it with openness will help clear their mind instead of making them feel like they’re going in a downward spiral.

Remain calm during emotional outbursts. This can be challenging because everyone has an innate fight-or-flight response. When you stay at the same tone of voice, give them some distance and say something such as, “Perhaps you need some time to decompress.” or “What can I do to help you?” the person will most likely start to gather themselves emotionally.

Apply self-care. In order to continue supporting someone with PTSD/C-PTSD, you need to care for yourself too, otherwise you’ll suffer from caregiver’s burnout. As they always say, “Take care of yourself or you can’t take care of anyone else.”