Every Me And Every You - Twenty One
When you woke up again the next day you were alone in the bed. Shifting position, you tugged the kimono that had been discarded in the night back on, and searched in your bag for your phone.
You checked your messages and social media apps, responding to a few friends before deciding it was time to get out of bed. Just as you were about to throw the covers back, the bedroom door opened and Spencer entered, a tray in his hands.
“Good morning. I was starting to think you really were Snow White for a while there. How’s your head?”
“It feels okay. Sleep seems to have done it’s job and got rid of the headache.” You rolled your neck on your shoulders, releasing the tension that was still pent up, hearing your neck crick. Spencer cringed.
“Sorry, it does that sometimes.”
He crossed the room, perching on the side of your bed and lowering the tray to you.
Coffee and orange juice. Pancakes and syrup, with a side of bacon.
“I thought you couldn’t cook?”
Spencer grinned. “I can’t. I can pour coffee and juice really well though, and the cafe down the road can cook and luckily, provide take out.”
“Well I appreciate it all the same.” You adjusted yourself on the bed, wincing as the cover dragged over your chest as you sat up.
“Sore?” he asked, noticing the wince.
“Not sore, they don’t hurt. Just…. Extremely sensitive.”
“Good sensitive or bad sensitive?”
“Currently, good sensitive. I mean, they’re sensitive at the best of times but the slightest touch would erm… Well you know.”
He raised an eyebrow at you. “The slightest touch would turn you on, is that what you’re trying to say Y/N?”
“That’s good to know. Anyway, eat up before it gets cold and I’ll fill you in our plans for the day, providing you’re still happy to go ahead with what was discussed last night?”
“The role play? I’m still happy to try,” you told him, feeling a sense of excitement already. You started tucking into your food, the pancakes delicious.
“Excellent. It’s been a good few months since I’ve had chance to do this. You’re familar with the concept enough for me to not have to explain the ins and outs yes?”
“Well yeah, I mean come on Spence, the amount of role plays we’ve had to do on training courses. Albeit, they were a totally different kind.”
“And I’m very happy they were. The last course I had to go on was led by Morgan. I would have walked out if it was same kind of role play that we’ll be doing today.”
“Does the chocolate thunder not do it for you?” you teased, using Garcia’s nickname for Derek.
Spencer chuckled lowly. “Nope he most definitely does NOT.”
Something about the way he answered you made you ask the next question.
“He doesn’t do it for you because he’s got a penis right?.”
Reid just stared back at you, his eyebrows raised again waiting for you to get it.
“Really what, Y/N.”
“Have you…. Are you…. Do I even want to?”
“I’m not gay, obviously. I’m not even sure what I’d label myself as. I’ve never been in a relationship with a man.”
“But you have….. had sex with a man?” you whispered the last part, although you weren’t sure why.
“Yes. I’ve experimented with a man. I’ve had my eyes opened up to a lot of different things over the years.”
Oh your little brain was having trouble with this one.
Spencer being into BDSM was one thing, Spencer having had sex with a guy was another.
He looked at you thoughtfully, trying to read you.
“Does that bother you, Y/N? That I’ve been with a man. You’ve got a pretty strange look on your face right now.”
You were sure you had.
“It doesn’t bother me, no. Not that. It’s just…… Every preconception I had about you is being smashed to pieces. None of this would surprise me if it coming from Morgan, or even Rossi. But….you just seem so innocent and…..I dunno. I should stop being surprised that you’re turning out to be the complete opposite of what I imagined.”
“And what did you imagine exactly?”
“I…. I don’t know.” You set your knife and fork down, done with your food.
“No come on. You said you had preconceptions about me. What were they?”
“Alright. Giving the teasing I saw from Morgan and Prentiss when I first joined the team, initially I presumed you were still a virgin. Which surprised me given your age, but you did very little to dispel that. I can’t remember exactly when I realised that you weren’t, but you said something and I thought ‘oh so he’s not’ but he obviously doesn’t get it very often.”
“Carry on. I can tell there’s more.”
“Okay… So then I figured you were some hopeless romantic who’d probably waited until he was like 25 before he lost it.”
“16,” he told you.
“Younger than I was. I was 18. Which again, shocks me. You’re just so awkward around girls at work or when we’re out. I don’t get it.
He shifted on his bed, tucking one of his long legs underneath him.
“What don’t you get exactly?”
“Why you act that way at work. When you’re clearly not as awkward as you let on.”
“It’s not an act Y/N. I AM awkward around other females until I get to know them. I’m weird and I talk too much about things no one cares about. Outside of work when I’m by myself, I’m a lot more…. prepared to take risks, when there’s no one to watch me get shot down or fall flat on my face. But in work, or around the team…. Well put me next to Morgan or Hotch or even Rossi and I’m the least appealing of them.”
“No you’re not,“ you replied, unbelieving that he could even think that.
“I’m fine with it Y/N. Really, I am. Stand me next to Derek Morgan with his abs and his pick up lines and I’d lose everytime. So I don’t even put myself up against him, there’s no point. I have my own thing and I enjoy my own thing, I’m good at it. And it’s really not an act. It’s just I feel more comfortable and at ease in certain scenarios than others.”
“Okay. Fair enough. I get that. But Spencer…..you wouldn’t lose everytime. Trust me on this. I’ve seen the way girls look at you when we’re out as a team. You get just as much attention as Morgan, you just choose not to see it.”
“Maybe I do, and maybe you’re right. I’m just not as confident as you are around the people we work with. Put me in my own comfort zone though and I’m fine.”
“But that’s a comfort zone you hide from everyone else.”
“And it’s a zone you’re hiding too.”
He was right. You’d never willingly tell the others that you’d been experimenting with BDSM, although it had nothing to do with who you were experimenting with.
“There’s still a stigma attached to it isn’t there. That’s why we’re not honest and open about it. You heard the jokes Derek and even Emily were making about the Doms and subs when we were out on that case. Oh god….. Spencer, I’m sorry. How uncomfortable he must have made you.”
Your companion shrugged, picking up the orange juice you hadn’t touched and taking it sip of it.
“I wasn’t uncomfortable. But you’re right. There’s a stigma. People into BDSM, people into anything other than the ‘sexual norm’ are still viewed as deviants or perverts. In our line of work, I can do without being judged because of what I like to do in my spare time and I’m sure that you can appreciate that just as much right now.”
You definitely, 100 percent, could.
“Spencer… Why me then? Why did you tell me when I asked? If it had been Emily or Penny, would you have opened up?”
He stared into your eyes momentarily before answering.
“Because I’d watched you all week, your curiosity was showing in your actions. The way you handled the evidence, the way you talked to the workers at the clubs or the witnesses. And you never once cracked a joke about the lifestyle. You were interested and I could tell. So when you asked, I figured I’d be honest. I trusted you enough not to say anything and to respect my privacy and you clearly trusted me enough to be open and honest about your curiosity, and then to ask me to do these things with you.”
“I trust you with my life, Reid.”
“As do I you. I also trusted that you’d take this for what it was and not find it weird that we’re two colleagues, fucking each others brains out in the strangest of ways.”
You laughed at that. You had found it strange initially, but not because it was a colleague, just because it was him. But it was so easy to be yourself around him and so far it had been easier for this to not affect work. Because you HAD taken it for what it was. A bit of fun, a curiosity that was being satisfied. There weren’t any feeling involved other than friendship and a mutual physical attraction. And that made it easy.
“Speaking of fucking each other in strange ways…. I’m done with breakfast. Are we moving on to sexy spanky times?”
“Sexy spanky times…..You make it sound like you want to me bent over my desk and paddled.” He licked his lips slowly, his eyes trailing down your face to your chest.
“Maybe I do. But only if I’ve been bad and deserve it.”
Yeah.. Dirty talk was not your forte.
Although by the flicker in his eyes then, perhaps you weren’t as bad as you thought.
“Okay. Get up, get bathed and dressed. It’s 10am now, that gives me time to set up in the living room.”
“Rearrange it into an office of sorts. And to change into a suit. You report for work at 11am. No later, alright.”
“Yes Dr Reid.”
He shot you a look. “None of that. Sir will do nicely thank you. Black french knickers and the bra that fastens at the front please. Hair up, I don’t mind how. And stockings please. Yellow or red at anytime.”
He reached over and ran his thumb over your bottom lip, you poking your tongue out and licking it lightly.
“I could get to use to that coming from your mouth.”
Maybe you could too.