someone tell me who made this

darktonic  asked:

Positivity: Kara Danvers has helped me accept my experiences with loss and pain and turn them towards something more positive instead of just bottling it up. Especially having lost my mother at a very young age (Christmas is hard for this reason) and I think it's kinda important to show characters dealing with loss that don't use that loss to hurt others but rather help and help heal others.

Tell us why the show is important to you, or any moment that it made you smile.

Thank you so much for sharing, hon!!!

And I know how Christmas can be hard…I’m right there with you… -hugs tight-

And I completely agree with you. It was SO important to me to see someone who had lost so much still being able to be kind, and gentle; to see Kara dealing with her grief and anger, but still being this bright light in people’s lives.

Kara inspires me to be better, and she reminds me that even though we might be dealing with pretty heavy emotions, we’re still capable of spreading love and light~

anonymous asked:

Yixing for the lucky prompt drabble game please. Thanks!!!

Originally posted by r-velvets

Zhang Yixing: “I’ve seen you from afar and I’ve always thought you were cute and innocent and I found that endearing but I just came in today and I found you telling someone straight to their face fucking fight me and now I found you even more attractive.  What’s wrong with me?


There were people who were made to change the world, like the ones who occasionally found scientific purposes to keep the human kind existing and others who died for their country and were written in history books. In the eye of many, those people were crazy…at first, that’s what people think but Yixing always found some kind of respect beneath himself when he met someone with that leadership that could bring amounts of people together to change the society that ruined us all. Some were hidden between seas of people and never got to be understood and the moment he met her, sitting at the corner of the classroom with a book over her table and her hands resting in between her knees, looking at the professor with some kind of professionalism that people lacked of nowadays.

Yet, he understands her…everything was blind dating, sex, drugs, cigarettes, alcohol and whatever could make them feel…free when they’re the oppressors of thousands of people who weren’t even happy anymore. She read a lot about that, he knew it the moment he learnt the name of the book she was reading and he searched for it on the internet, only to find out that the world was way worse than he could ever imagine it to be. He found it endearing, how she looked so innocent and cute when people looked at her, how her fluffy cheeks and dreamy looks could make him think that she was just another woman who took her time in getting ready and trying to look beautiful, but she was also intelligent…a life changer at least. When the two started talking, he knew that someday she was going to change the world.

And he was going to help her with it.

The change started from the littlest of situations and the moment he saw her, taking one of the seniors by his collar and pressing him to the wall, he knew that something had happened. Her face was a little bit tight, her frown was even harsher than expected and he would’ve thought she was harassing him if only he didn’t know better. To the people who were quick to misjudge her, there was a freshman by her feet, his nose bleeding after being beaten down by the older male. Her hand tightens and she hits his head against the wall before talking to him in a low, mysterious voice.

“If you are as strong as you say you are, fucking fight me.” She drops him to the ground and the man only looks at her with some kind of fear in his eyes, but he covers it up perfectly with pride. Yixing immediately stands by her side, careful that the senior could do anything to her…not all people were good in this world and once she helps the freshman up, the other man speaks.

“What the fuck is going on with you?”

“I should ask the same thing, you asshole!” She tells him as she looks at the freshman’s broken nose, immediately looking over at Yixing before sighing. “I am going to ask you to take him to the nurse, see if his nose is great.” Yixing is not too sure about leaving her alone but the determination in her eyes tells him otherwise. The black strands of his hair are sleeked back by his hand out of stress and she touches his shoulder in reassurance. “I trust you.  Don’t lift his face up, it isn’t good for nosebleeds.”

“Are you going to be alright?”

“I will,” She tells him and pats his back before pointing towards a professor. “But it seems like I have some explaining to do.”

His nerves were settled somehow and it’s ridiculous that he sees her as a hero when she did something so trivial, but people forget how important it is to help others nowadays. Yixing was standing outside her apartment only a night later, wearing a tank top that left him a little bit cold and skinny jeans. He had called her and in the matter of seconds, she was looking out the window and he waved cutely at her. There wasn’t a complete reason as to why he liked her that much, but the contrast between what people thought she was and what she really was made him feel…comforted, as if there was a beautiful future coming up for her. She smiles softly as she looks down at Yixing, wondering how someone as sweet as him could be interested in talking to her.

“Are you free?” He asked her and the tone of his voice is like the sugar that tops a delicious treat and she can’t help but feel her heart fluttering when she nods her head. Suddenly, he lifts up a bag that he had on his hands. “I brought takeout.”

And it’s at that moment that she knew that Yixing could see past her stereotypes and finally get to know who she really was.

mac’s dream but toxic is playing and keeps getting faster

3

—The conversation between your fingers and someone else’s skin - this is the most important discussion you can ever have. (i.t) 

for alli. thanks for sharing some of your magic with us bby ♥

To love me means also loving to hear all the raging thoughts in my head at one in the morning when all of my frustrations suddenly burst; it also means embracing all the quirkiness wrapped around my entirety like adoring how beautiful the stars up above midnight or how the clouds move in a slow motion to form warriors and knights; it may as well mean coming with me at Mcdonald’s when I crave for some fries and sundae at two in the morning; it’s also defined as listening to my senseless and repetitious stories about my dreams, fantasies and everyday life. To love me means swearing that you would listen to the songs I would tell to you in the middle of the day because I assure you, you’d be hearing from me talking about them from time to time.

Loving someone like me isn’t easy for I am someone scarred badly in the past. My whole system is composed of heartaches, pains, sorrows and miseries—I am imperfectly flawed but that made me who I am. To love me is to embrace those imperfections stitched through my veins. To love me means allowing me to have solitude once in a while since I have these moments that I want to shut my world down from everybody else; I have those dark times that I never wanted to talk to anybody at all and just want to lock myself in my own world. Just give me some time to think, at the end of the day I will come back to you. To love me is to tell me how much you care for me even in the slightest way—I will surely appreciate that even my form of appreciation and gratitude is to tell how corny or annoying you are, but deep down, your words mean a lot and warmed my heart. To love me means staying with me no matter how messy and difficult I could be. All I ever want is someone who will stand right behind me during my darkest and worst moments of my life.

To love me is to tell me your thoughts and opinions about the things I keep on telling you about even they mean nothing to you. To love me is to allow me to grow with you as a being physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually.

I am a complicated and difficult person. I am crazy, wild, freak, easily hurt and gullible. So tell me you love me when you only mean it. I don’t have time for some franks or what. I have had enough of heartbreaks in my past. I am aging and all I ever want for now is a stable and long-lasting relationship that would make me choose to stay no matter how many rocks were thrown at us or no matter how turbulent and bumpy the roads may get.

To love me means a little bit of sacrifice. But I can guarantee you that I could make you feel you’re the best person in the world and you didn’t make the wrong choice by choosing me over them. With me, I can make you feel disconnected from the rest of the galaxy. I will surely make tons of efforts for our relationship to keep going and last. It will be a tough ride for the both of us but I can assure you that it will be worth it and filled with so much fun. To love me means needing and wanting me like the way I do to you.

—  redserpent42, To Love Someone Like me

To my fake friends, thank you for showing me the value in understanding people for what they are. Thank you for taking all of my good qualities and turning them into something negative to fit your narrative. Whereas a real friend would see my effort not to judge others and allow others second chances as beautiful, you saw me as easy to manipulate and easy to control. Where a real friend saw my habit of ensuring our relationship is okay by asking honestly, “Are we okay?” when I sensed any sort of discomfort as honest and looking for a way to amend things if they were wrong, you saw it as a sign of weakness and instead, never told me until things came to a resentful head. Where the best of my friends would look at my habit of apologising and immediately trying to make amends as the quality of a kind and genuine person, you deliberately saw it as something to exploit by making me feel worse and worse every single day by never telling me what was wrong but bitching behind my back.


Initially you must have surprised me.


Your kindness, or your (false) giving nature, something about you must have truly made me think the world of you. You see, I’m the kind of person who will love you genuinely or not love you at all. I don’t play games of in-betweens and I certainly don’t pretend to be friends with someone if they are not someone I care about. The truth is, without you, I would not know who my real friends are, nor how to value them. I would not have learned that some people thrive on being unkind. I would not know how to handle those who look for reasons to dislike me, rather than the other way around. I never understood insecurity for what it was. Because I am a highly self critical person and tend to focus on what I have done wrong rather than anyone else.


Without you, I could not have learned how to look outside and understand that other people are flawed too.


I would not know how to stop being so hard on myself. I would not grow from being a people pleaser to choosing the people I love carefully and with consideration. You taught me how to appreciate that I am a person worthy of love, and forgiveness and kindness, by treating me the opposite way. You taught me strength by showing me that when I was in my greatest pain, the person I needed to rely on most was myself because you were only going to be unkind and orchestrate more pain in my life.


Thank you for that. Thank you for every lesson you have taught me. Because I could not be prouder of who I am today, and it is you that I have to thank for that

—  Nikita Gill, A Thank You To My Fake Friends

[TRANS] HAPPY SUGA DAY [TO. ARMY]

hello, I am BTS’ Suga
haha how is it already my 25th birthday? it feels weird
I mean it seems like I was 20 a few days ago
It has been my fourth spring and my fourth birthday since debut
me, who was always impatient and has many worries about the future. me, who always seems to be 21 years old
performing in front of countless ARMY
and telling someone that your senior sunbae is doing concerts on the other side of the globe
and I live a busy life daily and I’m so happy meeting you guys it all seems like a dream
after debut many ARMYs made sure to celebrate my birthday like this every year is exciting. actually, I didn’t hold any significance on birthdays like that.
but I think about ARMY who are happy while taking care of this and that for my birthday, also makes me think my birthday is something special
ARMY thank you for making me a special person!
I may look like a person who lives just because they were born
but I’m trying really hard and trying to become a better person
please watch for a long long time in the future
Thank you everyone for the birthday wishes
as much as I’ve grown a year older, I will repay you with better music and better stages

p.s. I don’t want to grow older anymore

trans; @hobuing | do not repost or crop credit

anonymous asked:

I'm sorry to bother you, but do things really get better? I'm 16 right now and everything I know is sadness and exhaustion and anger and then I talk to my parents and they just complain about adult life... is it worth it to go on?

oh gosh, i promise, it’s worth waiting, buddy. i know there are a lot of people who say, oh it gets better. and it does in some ways, but what it really gets is different. the people who are angry and mean and horrible often stay that way. the people who cut you off or who flip you off or who piss you off often are the same people at 16 as at 26. 

i think i hated people telling me “it gets better” because what could get better about being a mentally ill queer cuban girl in a world that wanted to eat me. i got spat out. my writing isn’t published because i’ve been rejected so many times i don’t even notice anymore. i was told a few times “make it less obviously homosexual”. what is going to get better about that, i said to myself. the memory of it will never be a nice one.

things got different slowly. like i didn’t realize until i was far on the other side of it. i wasn’t kidding in that last post when i said today i read my writing at 15 and it was painfully obvious how depressed i was. i didn’t have a diagnosis. like you, all i knew was that i was exhausted and angry and sad all the time and when i talked about it, i was told “everyone feels that way sometimes.” i felt that way all the time. in this story, i don’t suddenly wake up after turning 18 and have a magical life where it is all bunnies and flowers and loving. it took me 3 years of trying before i finally managed to quit self-harm completely. my eating disorder and i are still not on speaking terms, luckily. i’m slowly getting a handle on my ocd. i didn’t realize that the biggest thing that was changing was me.

yeah. being out of the house made it easier. away from where people knew me as a certain person. being someone new or being who i was or being in a room full of people who didn’t care how gay i was. being in control made it better. finding real and true friends made it better. being able to make my own plans and choose my own story and do more than just wait until i was old enough to be taken seriously - it got better.

but honestly it’s me. i learned how to shake hands with depression, he and i are such good old buddies i sometimes see him before he’s even coming. and i’ve gotten so good at getting out of his embrace, because practice makes perfect, same as anything. and i’ve learned things about myself i had no idea about at 16. i didn’t even realize i’m funny. i had never been skinny dipping. my only kiss had been sort of an accident. there was a lot i cared about then that i don’t care about now, because in my new world outside of that, the people i surround myself with don’t care either. i’ve worn a dinosaur onesie pajama set to eight parties now when 19 year old me wouldn’t be seen without her makeup. i wear glasses in public even though i’m nervous they make me look like a bug. i have tattoos and new piercings and a bank account (and no money) and i have love. and i don’t mean with a partner, although i’m blessed enough to say i have that as well - i mean. i just found it. i taught myself how to look for it. i figured - listen, i’m here still, so i might as well, like, try to enjoy it. and it wasn’t overnight. it still goes away sometimes. but i love so much and so easily now. i laugh more because of it. i let myself love dogs and movies and silly things. and this love sort of … makes things better. because it reflects off of everything into you. like a mirror.

at sixteen… at sixteen i was very suicidal. i didn’t know that it applied to me, because i thought i was just annoying and lazy. looking back now i always pull a face at how obvious it was, and how close i got to walking myself into a grave. it was more than a close call. death, like, waved. i actually believed i wouldn’t make it past 18. what was the point? what was the point of anything? i think if i’d told myself then, “it gets better”, i would have laughed. “maybe for you!” i would have said, “you have money and a life and you’re not like this.” but it did get better. in inches. stick around to see it. stick around to see everything wonderful that’s waiting in the wings for you. that knows your name. a fate of beautiful moments that are small and precious, like butterflies landing on fingers or snowflakes on tongues, or just sitting with a good book during the rainfall. hell, stick around to write the book, because (trust me), if you believe in your art and yourself - it can be done.

stick around most of all because what gets better is you fall in love with yourself. the world doesn’t become suddenly sickeningly sweet, even if the people around you become better and you’re given more opportunity. that’s wonderful too but… what happens is that over time, the stuff they told you stops sticking. you realize that just because your nose is crooked it doesn’t even matter because it doesn’t stop you from being the best dang ping pong player in your family. you realize you have a family, even if they’re not blood. you realize you are your own family. and you learn to take care of yourself and yes, it gets ugly at times, but you manage. and inside of managing there’s all these wonderful successes like mac and cheese and getting the bills done and the smell of clean laundry and friends that make you laugh so hard you almost pee and an apartment with plants in every corner and a hairless cat in sweaters or a dog with a bowtie or both and watching movies and reading books and seeing art, all of which haven’t been created yet, and possibly you’re the one who makes them. and managing … managing doesn’t have to be big. sometimes it’s just making a small difference. and sometimes the person you make a difference to is yourself. and that’s amazing.

stick around because, trust me, somewhere in there, you meet your younger self in your dreams and you tell her - oh gosh, i promise, it’s worth waiting, buddy.

an incomplete list of lines in aftg that will always fuck me up

“Did you know I’ve never been skiing?”

“I told her what would happen if she raised her hand again. She had no right to look so surprised.”

“His father. Your coach.”

“Who said ‘please’ that made you hate the word so much?” “I did.” / “I was seven,” Andrew said. “I believed him.”

“If it means losing you, then no.”

“Go on, tell me again how I’m too unbalanced to understand normal brotherly affection and love. Tell me this is natural.”

“Good,” Neil said quietly. “So now you understand why Andrew killed your mother.”

“Do you honestly think that if I wanted to kill someone, whether it was myself or someone else, that I would fail so spectacularly at it so many times?”

“Neil,” Wymack said, “between you and me, I don’t think you’ve ever been fine.”

“I’m tired of being nothing.”

“Would it kill you to let something in?” “It almost did last time.”

“Neil? Are you all right?” Neil smiled. It felt like it tore his face open. “No. No, I’m not.”

“Thank you,” he finally said. He couldn’t say he meant thanks for all of it: the keys, the trust, the honesty, and the kisses. Hopefully Andrew would figure it out eventually. “You were amazing.”

“Everything I needed, you already gave me. You let me stay.”

“You are a Fox,” Andrew said, like it was that simple, and maybe it was.

“Wait, he chose Neil over you? That sounds a little serious for a fling, don’t you–” Nicky glanced at Neil’s blank face and faltered. “News to you too, huh?”

“That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t blow you.”

“I won’t be like them. I won’t let you let me be.”

“Stay,” Andrew said, and leaned down to kiss him.

This was everything he wanted, everything he needed, and Neil was never letting go.

Sick of Losing You

Plot: Harry and Y/N lost each other when he found someone else.

Warnings: None aside that it kinda broke my heart.

Playlist to the one shot: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2S-tehb1XqDqkmE4xnz7-SciJy61soVf

Thanks to @interfectorems for being such a good friend, supporter and for requesting this. 
Songs that are mentioned but not on the playlist are “Out of the Woods” by Taylor Swift & “If You don’t Know” by 5Sos.

Pic of this beauty isn’t mine.

I watched from a far how he held on to her hand, his fingers grasping and squeezing hers gently while his eyes never left her pretty face. He watched her speak with such an intensity in his green eyes, as if he literally saw nothing other than her. His girlfriend. Not me.
I took a deep breath, swallowed the thick lump building in my throat and turned away from the sight.
Exactly three weeks ago, Harry and I had shared a kiss. Our first kiss, which had been exactly how I’d secretly always wished for it to be. Of course it had been. Every time you get to kiss the person you love is special and like fireworks painting colors into the sky.

He’d been talking and listening to me all night, similar to how he now was with her and had at some point reached out to hold my hand, just like he was holding hers in this moment.
When the time felt right, he’d leant in and had captured my lips with his. Needless to say, Harry was a phenomenal kisser. He knew when to press further, when to use how much tongue and was very attentive to how my body responded to his. Whenever I thought about it now, my cheeks tingled with the memory of his hands cupping them gently as he cradled my face to keep me close. He’d been so soft, so perfect. Harry had touched me with a tenderness, I thought it’d break my heart. I remembered wrapping my arms around his neck and feeling like they belonged there, like I was meant to hold him close.
Only that I wasn’t. The girl he was with now only proved how insignificant I was.

I couldn’t help peaking and looking over at him again. Harry’s lips. I knew exactly how they felt when pressed against my own, knew their taste and shape. Their warmth. Harry’s touch was impossible to forget.
I watched him kiss his girlfriend with a mesmerized stare, before moving away and into the kitchen, leaving the small gathering of our friends with a murmured excuse that I needed to get a refill of my drink, when in reality I couldn’t bear seeing the man I loved sharing affectionate kisses with someone else.
But not even the kitchen was a safe area for me. t had been this exact kitchen, the one in Harry’s house, where he’d pulled me aside and told me about her for the first time.

“It’s difficult” I think he said. “It’s my fault that this situation has become so messy.”

Was it silly that I could actually still remember every word he spoke to me? That I’d engraved every pause, every take in of breath he made, deeply into my head?

“Listen, Y/N… You’re important to me. I care about you. Need you, it’s just… There is someone. Someone who could be a chance for a relationship and I really want to give this a go. Give her a go, I mean. You can understand that, right?”

At first it’d felt like none of it was real. Because how could he be serious?
Harry. My best friend, Harry.
Only three days after our magical first kiss, three days full of us talking and flirting and texting constantly, he was telling me that he wanted someone else. Her name was Ira. And though he was seemingly behaving the same way with her he had been with me, we weren’t the same. In fact, she was everything I wasn’t. So when he told me he wanted her and not me, that he was picking her over of me, how come I’d been surprised?

I would never be his first choice, not when there were thousands of others he could choose from. And it was time for my brain to learn to not interpret every kind gesture, time to learn to stop overthinking every word. It was time for my head to accept, that there was no way Harry Styles could possibly want me.

So… I had been understanding. Kind even.
I’d lied and told him that yes, I agreed that our kiss had been a mistake. We shouldn’t have done any of that and instead thought of our friendship first, rather than our impulses. I’d kept a smile on my face throughout the entire talk and even finished the short chat by wishing him good luck with her. Another lie.

My fingers shook and so I set the empty glass of my drink down quickly, worried for a moment that I might otherwise spill the last few drops. I didn’t think much when I reached for the bottle of vodka on the counter. There was no getting through this night if I didn’t have something proper to drink. If only I remembered the recipe….

“Need help?”

My shoulders tensed. It couldn’t be him. Please… anyone, literally anyone, but him.

However when I turned around, Harry was there. He stood tall and beautiful, his short hair soft and wavy. Harry’s compelling eyes held my gaze with such a tender rawness in them, my knees weakened. All my body burned for was to wrap my arms around his shoulders and have him embrace me, have him tell me that everything would be okay again. I felt like I needed it, but knew that this was a wish I would be denied. Harry must have felt it, too. It was in the air around us. It had changed and… buzzed. As if being in each other’s presence made the world halt still for a moment.

“I’m sorry,” Harry chuckled lowly when I didn’t say anything. How could he smile like everything was alright?

And what was it he was apologizing for? Abandoning our friendship? Ruining any hope I’d had to find a partner in him? Shattering my heart? Hardly.

“For scaring you,” Harry elaborated, a sudden hint of guilt in his eyes, almost as if he’d read my thoughts.

“It’s fine, Harry,” I muttered, bearing a false smile, “All good.”

It was hard to look at him. Especially his eyes. They burned a whole into my chest whenever my own orbs found them. They reminded me of the Harry he once was, the one I could always come to and rely on.

“What are you doing?” Harry asked, his head nodding towards the bottle of vodka. His forehead furrowed in a worried expression and I quickly set the container back down.

“I wanted to make myself a drink, but the recipe slipped my mind. I’m not as much of an alcoholic as it must look like.”

“Good to know,” Harry chuckled, then, visibly thinking about it first, took a step forward. “I remember what you like in your favorite drink. Could make you one.”

From how close he was standing, it was easy to notice every detail of his skin. Every curve of his lips, every hair of his barely-there beard. My stomach turned.

“That’d be nice.”

Harry smiled and nodded. “Okay.”

We avoided any touching. I was leant against the counter, he stood with a safe distance between us and only came closer when he needed a different ingredient that happened to be near me. It was awkward and… weird. It didn’t feel like ‘us’. The friends we’d been once seemed to be two completely different people. I knew him and felt he was familiar, but there was a emotional distance between us I knew neither of us could overcome. And still, I was with him and even if we behaved like strangers, being with Harry was nice.

“I think that’s it,” Harry said, breaking the silence. His eyes were set on the pink-orange liquid in my glass, then they drifted to my face. A proud smile pulled at the corners of his mouth.

“You 'think’?” I challenged shyly.

I took the glass from him (cautious not to touch his fingers) and took a sip. It tasted great.

“M'not big of a show off,” Harry grinned, “S'it good?”

I nodded and stirred the colored liquid once more. “Thanks, Harry.”

“You’re welcome, Y/N.” His voice was soft and his gaze shy.

The air around us shifted once more. My eyes teared up. What had happened to us? Harry and I… we used to be the kind of friends who didn’t stopped talking to each other for hours. At first, we’d be loud. We’d laugh and giggle so much eventually both of our tummies hurt. That was when we’d change the subject and speak more quietly, until several hours later our conversations drifted to topics only we were allowed to hear. Then we’d be whispering and sitting closer together, always an eager sparkle in the other’s eyes as we both listened with interest about what was being said.

I quickly turned away and pretended to yawn. My eyes blinked rapidly and I willed them not to cry in front of him. Not because of embarrassment, but because I couldn’t do that to him. I’d given him my okay. I had no right to be mad at him for having found someone else. Harry remained standing close and with his hands in the front pockets of his black jeans.

“I think I should go,” I muttered.

I held my head low and took a deep breath before looking at him briefly. Harry’s eyes held concern and his fingers twitched, as if he longed to reach out for me.

“Y/N, love,” he began lowly, “Do you think we could talk for a bit? S'been a while since I got to see you. Hear your voice. I missed you.”

This time when my eyes met his green orbs, I didn’t look away, even though I could feel the tears forming and coming closer to spilling over. Harry’s whole expression changed. His cheeks paled and his forehead furrowed deeper.

“I miss you, too, Harry,” I admitted, my weak voice barely above a whisper.

“No,” he mumbled, shaking his head slowly, sorrow deeply set in his eyes. His feet stepped closer and his warm hands touched my flushed cheeks before I even had the chance to back away from him. The unexpected closeness caught me off guard and had more tears coming, this time because of how much I hated how uncommon this sort of care from him had become.

Harry embraced me. His head buried itself into my neck and both arms wrapped themselves around my waist so he could lift me up from my feet. “Please no, Y/N, Sweetheart. Don’t cry.”

I couldn’t help it. My heart, the final bit that had been whole still, broke in his caring hands and I was overcome and pulled under a wave of grief. That was what I was doing. I was grieving our friendship and the lost hope I’d had for a relationship with him. And he allowed it. He let me cry against his collarbones without any complaint and instead began to hum quietly, knowing how much his voice always soothed me. Pain shot through my chest. He probably did the same when she was upset.

“I can’t-” I cried, but got cut off by my lungs that burned with need for air.

Harry hushed me, his hold tightening, “Don’t, Y/N. It’s going to be alright.”

I shook my head and loosened the hold I’d taken around his neck. My hands momentarily brushed his soft hair, then I pulled away. Harry hesitated but allowed me to step out of his hold.

“I can’t take it anymore, Harry,” I confessed, my voice breaking halfway through the sentence. I reached up to brush my cheeks with the end of my sleeve and hiccuped. My head felt numb and I knew if I didn’t get out of this kitchen soon, he’d witness a break down I wasn’t comfortable with him seeing.

Harry’s hand reached for my arm. I didn’t fight it when he pulled me closer to him, but avoided his eyes when he leaned down to find my gaze.

“Y/N,” he spoke, his voice rough with emotion, “I promise you, it’ll be alright. M'not leaving, okay? M'not. We’ll figure this out.”

I wanted to scream but all I could was shake my head rapidly. “Figure this out how? What have we become, Harry?”

Another sob wrecked through my chest.

“I don’t know,” he confessed, “But we’re going to find each other again, okay? I promise. Let me say goodbye to the others and then we’ll go for a walk or something. We’ll talk. About everything and nothing at all… Just like we always used to, yeah?”

Used to. So long ago, it seemed.

“Okay,” I whispered, my burning eyes set on my feet. My skin shivered under his warmth and my lips hurt from how much I was bitting them.

I flinched when his mouth pressed a kiss to my head. The skin was left with a burning sensation. “Wait for me here, love.”

Harry’s quick feet carried him out of the kitchen and left me standing by the counter with my heart at the pit of my stomach. I stood up straight and brushed the few remaining tears from my cheeks. My skin tingled and I felt the hint of a smile on my lips, even though my body ached.
Looking back now, I wish I would have stayed put by the counter and had waited for him just like he’d asked me to. I wish I hadn’t been impatient and eager to reunite with Harry, because that eagerness drove me to exit the kitchen shortly after him and turn the corner, allowing me clear view into the living room.
There he stood. His arms around her thin form, his hands in her long hair and his lips kissing hers. All air was knocked right out of me. I could see how his hands gently moved against her neck, bringing her in closer and their bodies flush together. When their lips parted for a moment, I could see how he let his tongue run along his lower lip, as if he wanted to make sure he got all of her taste. And I could see him smile warmly at her, right before he leaned back in to connect their mouths once more. This sight… it burned.
I didn’t wait for him. Because I had been wrong before. My heart wasn’t truly broken until that moment, witnessing the man I loved with my everything, kissing a woman who wasn’t me. And if he wasn’t going to leave me, if he was just going to keep me close and allow my heart to shatter over and over again, then I supposed I would have to be the one to go first.
So that’s what I did. I walked back to the entryway, slid on my jacket, picked up my bag, and left the house. Left, to never come back to Harry Styles.

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A few years ago, I worked giving out samples at Costco for a year, and these were the best/weirdest things that happened to me:

Around Halloween, a man and woman walked by my cart, with a little boy who was crying as if he was losing part of his soul. They all had strong and beautiful Indian accents. The man said, “Son, what’s wrong? Son, what’s bothering you?” and his wife sighed and said, “He thinks we won’t let him be a ladybug for Halloween.” The father straightened up and said, “Son, of course you can be a ladybug! You can be whatever you want!” and they slowly got the boy to stop crying. It was one of the most heartwarming moments I’ve ever seen.

An elderly man with a long and greasy beard stole my opened bottle of Tabasco sauce that I was using, and proceeded to tilt it over his mouth and drink as much as he could. He then made a noise like “Whee-hee!” and said, “You can’t say you’re from Georgia, unless you can do that!” while I stared on with a horrified face.

(I’m not even in Georgia, and now, I hope to never be.)

A cart rushed by me, two children clinging to the sides of it, and a third pushing it as the other two yelled, “Faster, faster!” A minute later, a very frazzled mother ran in and said, “Have you seen my children?!” I pointed, and she ran off again.

A toddler chose me specifically to tell a story to, about how one time he went to a swimming pool, and there was a slide he really liked, and he went down it a bunch of times. His mom gave me a look of “I’m so sorry,” as the kid spoke, but she should not have been sorry. It was awesome.

A middle-aged man in a suit tried convincing me (while I was shutting down my cart and trying to avoid him) that Obama was the Antichrist, and that the whole world was run by someone called “The Black Pope” who was baptizing space aliens, and that’s why he liked Mitt Romney better. I countered by telling him that Mitt Romney’s real first name is “Willard,” and that made him dumbfounded enough that I could escape and clock out.

anonymous asked:

Bucky I just threatened to fight the cash register at work, and it made me wonder, how do I know if I'm someone's angry smol?

well, first you must determine if you are both angry and smol. steve is still both, despite being six feet plus of “patriotic justice.” someone needs to stop that man from reading his own press coverage. 

if you are, then you gotta figure out if there’s someone who:

1. fishes your ass out of the fire after you’ve jumped in 

2. tells you youre an idiot for jumping in in the first place, because you are

3. beats up the fire because youre in way over your head

4. laughs at your injuries because you’re an idiot (see above: fire jumping)

if there is someone who meets the above criteria, you probably need to go buy them a thank-you cheeseburger. they deserve it. 

now go kick that cash register’s ass. im sure it has it coming. 

To Maggie Stiefvater - thank you

Dear @maggie-stiefvater,

A year ago this month, you replied to my ask about how you deal with the fact that your OCD will never go away. I wanted to tell you how much that reply​ means to me, even a year after you wrote it.

I cried when I got that response, and then laughed and literally went for a run around my neighborhood because I was so excited. I had been struggling for so long, and hearing from someone who understood - and who was my favorite author - was more amazing than I can tell you. I printed that reply out and hung it up on my wall beside my bed so that I can read it whenever I’m struggling.

And I went though a lot of struggles in the past year since you wrote that reply. I started seeking help for my OCD, and that involved a lot of unhelpful and even rude therapists and medications that made me sick and even more anxious than I already was. I lost my best friend. The social anxiety that accompanies my OCD got so bad I couldn’t even talk in school without almost having a panic attack. I almost quit school. I stopped writing because I couldn’t do it without my OCD making me hate every word I wrote. Even reading became hard because my brain was too stuck in a loop of obsessions to focus on what I was reading. I started having awful suicidal thoughts and urges to self harm. Every day, I wondered how I would make it to the next. If I would.

Your words - whether they be in the response you wrote to me, in your books, or what you’ve posted on tumblr - helped to give me hope. There were times that I’d lie on my bed crying with my Raven Cycle books next to me because they reminded me I wasn’t alone. I read about Gansey and his anxiety in BLLB and felt like someone understood. I read about Ronan in TDT and found enough hope that I, too, would survive the suicidal thoughts. In the midst of being extremely lonely, I read about all love and friendship between the characters and felt like I had a friend in them, too. Sometimes at night, I would take the response you wrote to me on tumblr down from my wall and read it to remind myself that I’d be okay. Sometimes it didn’t feel true. You said my OCD could be a super power, but at that time it just felt like it was trying to kill me.

Even though it didn’t feel true then, it feels true now. I kept working to find the right medication and therapist, and it worked. The suicidal thoughts began to fade. They only really come back when I’m having a bad day, and they’re much easier to control. I can sit at my computer and actually write. It’s still hard sometimes, but I’m finally finding joy in it - and the rest of life - again. Also, I’ve realized that when I’m not in the midst of being controlled by my OCD, I’m driven and can get a lot of work done quickly. I don’t think I would be this way if I didn’t have this disorder. That doesn’t mean I love having it - there are still times that it feels like torture - but it is slowly becoming something I can control and use instead of something that controls me. Sometimes it still feels like a curse, but now I’m starting to see that yes, sometimes it’s also a super power​.

So thank you. Thank you for that response and your books and your honesty. Thank you for giving me hope. Thank you for helping me choose to stay. - theletterem
i don’t wanna love you | yoongi pt.2

Originally posted by nnochu

genre: fluff, angst, smut (previous part), college!au

pairing: yoongi x reader

word count: 4,636 words (short sorry!!)

description: just because he had fallen out of love with you, didn’t mean you had with him.

warning: swearing, i think lol

PART ONE


After the first month you still held hope. Hope that he would realise what a mistake he had made and would run to you, or phone you, hell even text you. You pretended that you knew it was over, that he wasn’t going to come back, to everyone around you but deep down you prayed. At night you would look for shooting stars, or you would look up at the moon and beg it to grant you one wish. That he would love you still. You didn’t think it was much to ask, but then again not even the moon was powerful enough to change the way Yoongi feels. Only he can do that.

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yeah, i’ll always love you guys too :)

in a perfect world...

“coming out” wouldn’t even be a thing. you’re a boy who wants to bring a boy to a family event? cool, guess you like that boy. you’re a girl who runs into her family friend while holding a girls hand in public? chill. like who even cares?? it’s not even a big deal, society made it a big deal! STRAIGHT people who say that gays flaunt their sexuality around too much, well maybe if they didn’t make it such a big deal that we needed to “come out” we wouldn’t feel the need to make it known! if society just accepted that you love someone as true and real love, we wouldn’t feel the need to tell people our sexuality. idk that’s just me tho lmao rant over.

i’m taking pre-orders for my spd/autism noise muffling beanies/headbands

YO I am so autistic and SO PUMPED that I came up with this product. earbuds and noise cancelling headphones are sensory hell for me, but I have finally figured out how to use only fabric to block out between 50% of sound. but if you order custom, I can adjust the amount of fabric to allow the amount of sound in you want.

the beanies and headbands are made of recycled sweaters!!!

i’ll start making them march 11th and i can have them shipped by march 12th seriously im hyperfocused

plain beanies are $15. plain headbands are $10. beanies with designs are $20. headbands with designs are $13. shipping is free because GREECE but it will also take about a month to get there because GREECE

you can pre-order a plain one, a space themed one, a plant themed one, or an animal themed one (my special interests lol)

OR you can custom order one in your special interest! i’m already making one for someone who really likes monsters and it’s going to have horns and lots of eyes so basically tell me what you’re interested in. custom beanies are $25 and custom headbands are $17. i can also change the fabric or add zippers or snaps or tassles or fringes. really just let your sensory desires run wild my buds

in conclusion i am SO FREAKING HAPPY. i see so many products for autistic people made by allistic people and it’s like??? no. i’m autistic and can’t hold down a job because of my anxiety disorder, so this is my only source of income. i’m also trying to save up money to buy a retired greyhound that is dying so i can give them a good home

etsy shop will be up tomorrow. PLEASE message me with what you want and i will mesage you because i’ll probably have made it in 1-3 days

please sign boost for autistic/spd people who shouldn’t have to deal with uncomfortable and unstylish ear protection!!!

a lot of reasons to love park jimin
  1. his smile
  2. his adorable fingers and how shy he gets over them
  3. his rainbow equivalent laugh
  4. works so so so hard on his dancing and vocals
  5. has the cutest eye smile in the entire world
  6. the way he throws his head back with a small laugh when he’s shy
  7. his scrunchy face
  8. how obsessed with twitter he is
  9. the way he walks is too attractive what the fuck
  10. the way he can literally rock any hairstyle or color
  11. the cute surprised face he had when they showed his ballet videos on the yangnam show
  12. how small he is compared to any other member
  13. how sensitive and sweet he is
  14. jungkook: breathes
    jimin: i was born in busan first
  15. loves taehyung so much
  16. his adorable selfies with jin lately
  17. so sexy on stage the
  18. his intense gaze when he’s dancing
  19. tries to roast a member but immediately apologizes
  20. when he forgot hoseok’s part in miss right and looked rlly sorry and laid his head on hoseok to make up for it
  21. how smol n adorable he looks next to namjoon
  22. his sugary sweet and honey smooth voice
  23. his high notes!!
  24. is finally gaining weight and is happy with himself
  25. his confidence!!
  26. the way he can never wear a headband right at a fansign
  27. how far he’s gotten from debut is so inspiring
  28. has a rlly nice relationship with all the members
  29. can never do anything even slightly mean without feeling bad and apologizing immediately
  30. “the jacket falling off was an accident” *does it 15 more times*
  31. he looks!!! so good!!! in the not today mv!!!
  32. his rlly soft vlives and logs
  33. that one vlive where he literally came on to color and colored in like 3 letters before being like “that looks good! i’m done now”
  34. when tae did that short video singing have yourself a merry little christmas and he responded with a video of his own
  35. “#JIMIN”
  36. his terrible but somehow still cute aegyo??
  37. when hoseok made a heart out of his hair and he just kept saying “heart!” at the camera and smiling
  38. “띠미니”
  39. that face he does when he tilts his head back and stares with big eyes right into the camera
  40. the way he somehow makes speaking in busan dialect sexy?
  41. his adorable english omg
  42. in the same vlive where he was coloring he was showing off his puma sweater and he was so happy because of how pretty it was
  43. in the vlive with jin and jeongguk when he kept flipping the camera back to himself like a little shit 
  44. and also couldn’t stop laughing at everything jin said
  45. jin’s #1 dad joke supporter even tho he hates how much he laughs at them
  46. his 3:33 move 
  47. the way he gets rlly shy when the other members hype him up
  48. but also begs for praise all the time
  49. in bon voyage
    jimin: no one’s praising my santa
    members: all suddenly praising him and talking over each other
    jimin: shy smiles and giggles at the camera
  50. in bon voyage: “he he he heh heh heh”
  51. cares about the members so much
  52. when they won an award and he started crying and namjoon kept saying “we couldn’t do this without jimin”
  53. his contemp choreo in butterfly and spring day!!!
  54. jin says he learns dance from jimin because he’s the nicest 
  55. he’s so humble no matter the amount of fans they get
  56. always says he’ll work harder even if he did perfectly
  57. his sarcasm when he was playing the i see game with seokjin in run bts
  58. lie saved 2016 and 2017
  59. when he harmonized with himself in that one performance of dope and literally killed us all
    1. he was soso soso cute in the hope on the street vlive he was in
    2. when he and tae were annoying hoseok while he was asleep in that one bbomb and they both ran away screaming
    3. his iconic excuse me
    4. the amount of times he’s danced to gg songs with hoseok
    5. when he and tae were jamming to bigbang
    6. when he was talking to chanyeol at isac like they were best friends!!!!
    7. his super messy hair in one of the latest bbombs
    8. his rlly adorable vlive with hoseok on hobi’s bday 
    9. the amount of times he and hoseok pushed each other down onto the bed during the blanket kick choreo omfg
    10. his dirty dancing with jin in the wings countdown vlive
    11. plus how adorable n smol he was in that vlive!!
    12. when he went to namjoon for help for lie instead of yoongi and yoongi kept glaring at him from across the stage at muster
    13. the bbomb of him and tae dancing like idiots
    14. his adorable striped sweater that gave him sweaterpaws!!!
    15. the one video he took of him and jeongguk after they ate spicy ramen and he licked his swollen lips how dare he
    16. how soft he gets when he’s cold
    17. his performance with yoongi of tony montana and instantly became the main rapper
    18. IDK I JUST LOV HIM SO MUCH