someone posted this on facebook and the rude comments made me cry

the life and times of ryan ross pt 8

.2015/2016

welcome all! make sure to thank @jen–ne–sais–quoi for the existence of these posts because the poor thing asked to know about ryan and now she probably knows more than she ever wanted to!

here in our final chapter, we shall see what ryan has been up to from where we left off in 2015 to as current as we can be as of today (feb 26, 2017) this is mostly links and pictures because he didn’t actually do a whole lot

alright, early 2015. pretty much all ryan ross does is spend time with friends, mostly dan keyes and ryland blackinton. he goes to coachella and looks lovely in his hawaiian shirt. 

he also posted some teasers about making music on instagram, but we saw no new music. 

the most important thing about 2015 is ryan’s beard. 

look at it. it’s glorious. 

in february/march of 2015 zayn has left one direction (this is a ryan ross post, why is she talking about one direction??? it’s relevant, i promise.) someone thought it would be funny to edit the 1d wikipedia page to day that ryan ross had joined the band. 1d fangirls lost their minds. ryan tweeted “ You guys got it all wrong, the four remaining members of One Direction are joining MY band” 

if you look at his twitter throughout 2015, some of the tweets are vastly different than others. it could’ve been him on drugs, it could’ve been shane morris. personally, i think it was more shane, but the other is a possibility. also in june 2015, he got super fucked up and crashed a PHASES show. there are pictures of it out there, but i don’t think it’s really appropriate to share them. i also vaguely remember someone (z maybe?) asking for them to not be shared because ryan was really embarrassed and upset about it. about the incident he said “Def was having too much fun at the Phases show tonight, I promise I’ll never do it again  again” so there’s that.

then in july ryro got a girlfriend! he began dating model helena vestergaard and it seemed really good for him. it was certainly good for all of us fans because he posted so much while they were together. she also posted a lot about him. there were so many ryan pictures. it was glorious. here are some pics

then the next most important thing of 2015 happened. 

dorothy ross. 

ryan and helena got the cutest puppy in the world

from then on his instagram is pretty much dottie, but none of us mind because she’s precious. 

we also got this monstrosity

that’s all i’m gonna say about that. more helena and dottie pictures. then we get a picture where ryan tells us he’s taking vocal lessons!! and then he posted a teeny clip of a new song!!! more dottie & helena. a video of him learning to box?

don’t forget that this era of ryan likes hockey and baseball. he watches both and plays hockey too. 

halloween 2015. the fucking party. so. you thought we were done talking about brendon urie. we’re not. by 2015, he and ryan are not talking, at all. brendon usually avoids talking about ryan at all. then adam levine (yes, that one) has a halloween party. ryan’s invited because he’s best friends with mickey madden. he goes as a gremlin. well, a mogwai because he’s fuzzy and not scaly, but yeah. 

brendon, dressed as a skeleton and with sarah, was also there. as far as i’m aware, they basically didn’t even talk. brendon goes on to mention it a million times.

btw, by this point ryan doesn’t use his twitter anymore, it’s all just instagram links. there were some tweets earlier in the year that i’ll be talking about in my shane morris companion piece, but basically, shane likes to troll ryan’s fans by tweeting things or posting things on facebook then quickly deleting them.

also in 2015, ryan posts a picture of what seem to be song titles along with promises for making new music (the “shut the fuck up” was in response to someone telling him to go to bed btw) 

we’re now at the end of 2015. it seems like this is when ryan finally disconnects his twitter from his instagram because (except for one) his tweets stop and his instagram continues. he has also dropped shane morris as his manager (thank god)

near the beginning of 2016, ryan tells us that he has written a song for a band called agelast (sadly, that is pronounced ah-gel-ist, not age-last) he posted on both twitter and facebook about this. i’m inclined to believe both posts were actually him, not shane, but who knows. there was this comment on the facebook page that would be nice if it was from him. 

then, also early 2016, he and helena broke up. he was all set to fly to visit her in australia on a long term modeling job, and maybe he did, but that was that on helena vestergaard. she deleted all traces of him from her social media. he continued to play hockey and post pictures of dottie. 

he also bought 5 pounds of sour patch kids, causing all of us to fear for his health. then he starts to become a bit of a recluse. he posts a lot less frequently and it’s usually dottie pictures. 

then he goes to a renaissance fair and saves lives with his look 

easily the most important part of 2016 was when ryan did a surprise performance with dan keyes’ band cologne at emo nite la. it’s everything. EVERYTHING. watch it now. it felt like a nice comeback and he looked GOOD

we also got another tiny song clip. more pictures and videos of dottie. he also modeled some new PHASES merch with Z and Langley 

he went to the beach and we were blessed with this glorious image 

then he turned 30! and jeremy burke & alison harvard threw him a mini party at midnight with pizza! 

also sometime in august, his demo ep was deleted from soundcloud (his whole soundcloud was deleted) along with his site going down and his facebook page being deleted. the only thing we know is actually ryan is his instagram. 

then came halloween. with costumes in the past like et, a sloth, and a gremlin, we knew he would not disappoint. he was link from legend of zelda and he spent a good amount of the party (adam levine’s again, bden was not there) with victoria asher and gabe saporta from cobra starship. have some pics. 

(that’s gabe beside him)

then he “drank some blood” in this adorable video with his vocal coach

throughout 2016, a director named dan adams (glitterworldinc on insta) had been tagging ryan in a lot of pictures. i’m going to make a companion piece for him as well, but i’ll mention him here. he posts pictures of ryan, sometimes with strange captions, sometimes with rude captions. many pictures didn’t have ryan in them, but he was tagged. some pictures were of ryan’s house or around echo park. see more about that in the companion piece. lots of speculation went on about what he was doing with ryan. we’ll get to that in a minute. something more exciting now. the longest clip of new music that makes me cry every single time i listen to it, that callback line. (fun fact, z commented on it and called him space boi which is where i get one of my tags for him)

he looked beautifully goth for new years 

now we’re in 2017!

we found out this year that all the things glitterworldinc had been posting are because ryan’s going to be in his new movie!! he’s playing a character named Dewey Parsons in daniel adams’ new movie starmaker

the newest picture we have from ryan himself is this

and dan adams (glitterworldinc) has recently posted two! one was posted today! 

and that is basically everything i know about ryan ross’ life from the earliest facts i know to today! thank you for coming along on this crazy long ride with me and reading this giant mess. i’ll make those companion pieces here soon, so look out for those!

EDIT: Update!!!!! ryan posted this mere hours after i finished this because he likes to make my life harder (i’m mostly kidding, i love him so much)

his caption: “On all twos Makin tunes on toons”

EDIT NUMBER 2: i should have made an outline for these posts, jesus christ. i told you all in another post that the guitar ryan burned alive would be important later and then i never told you why. the why is because brendon still has it. yep, he has the guitar that ryan burned all the way back in the cabin/pretty. odd. era. how do we know this? oh, just because brendon put it in his literal house of memories. it’s fine, i’m not crying. (it’s not fine, i am crying) the house of memories is a vip thing for this tour where fans can go in and take pictures with a bunch of old panic! things, from the masks from fever era to stuff from the victorious video. i would kill to go. 

Here is a boy who likes boys. But this boy who likes boys doesn’t like boys who don’t like boys who like boys. This sentence is complicated, but less complicated than his life as a gay student.

Here is a girl who likes girls. But this girl who likes girls doesn’t like girls who don’t like girls who like girls. This sentence is complicated, but less complicated than her life as a gay student.

French campaign against homophobia in universities.

Au Naturale

Requested by: @kellbell431

                                              _________________

“Roman? What the fuck?” I called him, literally in panic mode.

“What’s going on?” he spoke, mirroring my panic. “Baby, you okay?”

“No I’m not, take it off, now,”

“What?”

It was an ordinary day, me minding my own business and stalking people on social media, as you do. The last time I’d spoken to him was last night on Facetime and I’d been an emotional wreck, crying to him that I missed him.

(What a fucking loser, who does that? Question was answered this morning when the mean reds made an appearance.)

He consoled me, counting down the days with until he got home. So anyway, he explained that he’d be very busy the next day, so I knew that meant we wouldn’t have time to speak.

That was until I went on his Twitter to see what he was up to, without having to annoy him with texts. I’m not clingy, really. He’d posted a picture of me.

23 more days until I’m home, he wrote; alongside that caption was a cropped screen print of me on Facetime last night.

I looked rough as ever, skin uneven, eyes dull; probably from all that crying. Or maybe just that was just me in my natural state. Now he was letting the whole world see that! It was urgent. I went straight for a phonecall, forget time consuming texts.

“You are freaking out over an Instagram pic?” he asked, just to make sure he heard correct.

“Yes! I’m not even wearing make-up! You don’t understand!”

Of course he didn’t, he looked glorious 24/7.

“You look fine Y/N,”

“No, Roman please? I don’t look like myself there, at least let me make myself up and I’ll send you a prettier selfie?”

He laughed, ridiculing me, not believing what he was hearing.

“What’re you worrying about?”

“I’ve never put up a photo with no make-up on, well at least not on Instagram or Twitter. Facebook yeah, because it’s all family and friends,”

“So what?” how could he be so casual at a time like this?

“Roman, people are brutal with their comments online, and I really don’t wanna put up with it right now,”

“They’ve been pleasant though, go read them for yourself,”

“Mhh-hmm, no thank you. I know if I see a negative one it will haunt me forever, please just delete it?”

“I will, if that’s what you want, but y'gotta realise that photo’s been up for three hours. Me deleting it is not gonna change anything because someone somewhere has it on their phone or blog by now,”

I died internally, my heart racing way too quickly in frustration. He was right. This was the internet. Post something and someone copies it within two seconds; the evidence lives on.

“Why did you do it then?” I snapped at him.

Then he chuckled as if I was being silly and no longer endearing, and he was getting irritated.

“Because I missed you, I thought you looked beautiful last night and I always put photos of you up. Y'gotta relax, it’s not a big deal, I’ll delete it,”

“Well there’s no point, like you said, the damage’s done, so thanks,” I rolled my eyes. “It’s not a big deal to you, but it is for me!”

“How selfish of me, I’m sorry. Calm down. It’s a picture without make-up on, not a nude. It is normal y'know?” He was going overboard with the sarcasm.

Too overwhelmed with emotions, I hung up the phone on him. He was being rude and not willing to listen to me. It was like a one-sided joke, I didn’t appreciate the sarcasm either.

Not too long after, my phone danced next to me, signalling messages, I knew they were from him.

Roman: Really?

Roman: Over that?

Roman: I’ve deleted it.

Roman: Let me know when you’ve grown up about it.

I ignored him for a short while, four hours, but who’s counting?

It wasn’t until a few hours later that I’d calmed down. It took facing the picture on multiple occasions to get desensitised to it, and over it frankly. I knew my point was valid, in my own reality; I was insecure because who wouldn’t be if you were scrutinised by the public? But so was he; right in his own world for arguing that it didn’t matter what people thought.

So why was I berating him for casually posting a photo of me makeupless - the fact that he didn’t even emphasize it or notice it until I pointed it out, made me realise like he said, that it’s normal. I was fine to him. He was celebrating me as I was.

Y/N: I’m sorry.

Y/N: I’m really a whirlwind this time around huh?

Roman: You’re a fucking pain in the butt.

Y/N: But you luuuuuurv me?

Roman: That’s the problem.

Y/N: I am really sorry, I was overdramatic and rude. I just, y'know how insecure I am. I shouldn’t have lashed out on you.

Roman: It’s cool, I understand where you were coming from, but I didn’t mean any malice.

Y/N: I know. I’m an ass.

Roman: Lucky I like your ass. Would you kill me again if I put it up?

Y/N: Back on Twitter?

Roman: No lol just deleted off there, I’ll look stupid. On my Insta?

Y/N: Okay, under one condition.

Roman: What’s that?

I giggled as I searched in my camera roll and found the picture I was looking for. I sent it to him.

Y/N: I put this up?

Roman: No!

Roman: hell fucking naaah

Roman: Nope! Forget it! No deal!

Roman: NO. BUENO!

Y/N: Why?

I was genuinely confused because it was a cute picture; I stole from his laptop.

Roman: I look like a woman with overgrown facial hair. Nah.

Y/N: that’s because you are very pretty.

Roman: Bad angle - and where the hell did you get that? It’s private

Y/N: I stole it, is that what you do? Spend time at work taking selfies? There were loooaaads on your laptop. This was my favourite. You look adorable.

Roman: There’s nothing cute about it. It’s an outtake

But there was plenty that cute about it; how serene and delicate he looked, as opposed to his stature in real life. How soft and flowy, relaxed and carefree his hair was. That was Roman chilling, comfortable in his own skin. I loved it more because of how close it was, it suggested an intimacy; as if taken in a stolen moment between two lovers conversing. It’s the way he looked into the camera, tenderly. That was the way he looked at me.

Y/N: We gotta be fair here, you’ve already exposed me to the world in my natural state. I deserve to play too

Roman: Lool this isn’t a game

Okay, so he thought. Despite his pleas, I went to my Instagram and uploaded the picture. No filter.

@wweromanreigns you sure it’s not a game? - I tagged him.

Roman: You. Ass. Game on.

He threatened, but his chain of messages got swallowed in the notifications on the likes and comments his picture garnered within twenty seconds. Within a minute, I got a notification that he’d tagged me in a photo where I was sleeping on his shoulder, mouth wide open like I was catching flies.

Game on @Y/N - he tagged back.

Fuck him. He plays dirty.

I scrolled deeper in my camera roll, where I knew the juicier stuff was. I pulled something equivalent and posted it, tagging him in an unseen photo of him in his younger days. He was wearing leggings. That’d piss him off.

Those are pretty 👀 @wweromanreigns nice and tight.

Roman: That was for a school play you bully! I was Robin Hood.

My phone vibrated as another message came through.

Roman: You sure you wanna play this dirty? I have videos!  

It was a losing game, I knew this, there was just no way I was gonna win against him, but I was gonna have fun with it.  

Y/N: I’m not worried to be honest lol! Fuck your videos.

Roman: Tell your parents you love them before I start posting, it’s about to go down!

Y/N: Yeah yeah! If you get too wild, I’ll just send you a nude to keep you quiet and busy.

Roman: Whatever, fuck your nudes; the world’s about to see you have stage fright at your sister’s wedding!

Roman: I didn’t mean that, I was just tryna be a badass. I want all your nudes!

I don’t do this on Tumblr often but I’m about to get serious for a few minutes - if you really don’t care about fandom related things like people being dipshits, then scroll on by and keep on keeping on, it’s all good, but this has been been building for some time now and I feel like I need to say something about it. I included a nice picture of Geoffrey to tide you over in the meantime.

First off, what is being a fan about? Well, to me it means you like Thing, and you enjoy Thing, and you decide you want to spread some of the joy of that Thing to other people, so you set up an account on $website and you start posting about Thing and then maybe other people join in with you and you all squee and enjoy Thing together and talk about it and swap ideas, and then maybe you start sharing really hard to find stuff about $actor from Thing and you get warm and tingly when people discover Thing and enjoy it because of your $website. I can’t tell you how much I enjoy helping people discover and enjoy the things I like! It’s FUN for me to share, and I like contributing. That’s fandom at its most excellent and how it all should be.

HOWEVER.  

I really dislike ‘gatekeepers’, and I really detest people who go out of their way to repeatedly harass other fans when they decide they don’t like them. On its own, this is a common problem in fandom, and one I am fine with ignoring for the most part, but the particular thorn in *this* fandom’s side is complicated by the fact that Paul Gross is officially on Twitter these days, and when a celebrity is made party to this negative behaviour, things get really unpleasant and awkward for everyone.

There is a person on Twitter that some of you all may know, who is currently making it her business to harass other Paul Gross fans. She tags him into conversations that he has no business being part of, she makes very disturbingly creepy flirty tweets at him, she acts as though she is his personal agent/bodyguard and she has this odd habit of claiming her ‘cousin’ is running her Twitter account so she can repeatedly tell him, via her ‘cousin’, how ‘grateful’ he should be for her Facebook page (because he totally wouldn’t be so well appreciated without it… never mind that he’s been a successful actor for decades on his own merits).

Full Disclosure: I had a bit of a run-in with this individual on Tumblr a few years back; they were putting copyright symbols and their username on photos they had no such copyrights to and reposting them. I had the temerity to point this out, and was met with such teenage-level vitriole, verbal abuse and personal attacks, it was simultaneously amusing and annoying. I ended up blocking her on Twitter to get her out of my face, and thought no more of it. I was done with it and felt that was where things ended.

Alas, no.

A friend alerted me to her ongoing stalkery, harassing behaviour towards others a few months ago. As you might expect, I shook my head at the ridiculousness and just kind of shrugged and moved on, while simultaneously wishing they would find some other thing to obsess over. Then I began seeing disturbing things in my timeline: people tweeting at Paul that they would have to unfollow him because they couldn’t handle his ‘fans’ - or rather, a particular fan, for barraging them with insults and doing the textual equivalent of prodding them repeatedly and demanding they apologise for what I saw were completely innocuous comments - not directed to her, but at Paul.

I found myself apologising on fandoms’ behalf in one instance, and assuring them that this was not at all representative of people who genuinely enjoy Paul’s work. I was able to allay their concerns, but it heightened mine. And now it’s coming to my attention via a few other avenues that she is continuing to harass and insult established fans for reasons unknown, while simultaneously crying that she is a victim. She has sent private FB messages to continue laying into them, when they just want to be left the hell alone, even after she claimed to block them. The latest target of this nonsense? A German fan who is, in my personal experience, one of the least offensive people I follow on Twitter. Why? Because Paul actually followed them, when they asked him. She even demanded that this person share any Direct Messages Paul might send them with her. Uh… how about no?

What’s to be done? - well, that’s a pretty good question. What can you do, really? Nothing. This person has a right to be an asshole on the internet, just as it’s our right to ignore them. But it reflects poorly on us as a whole and I fear it looks even worse when the celebrity is constantly sucked into it; my fear is that it would make him withdraw from the site completely and how exactly does one tell a stalkery obsessive fan to just stop? You don’t, really, not without a restraining order.

Please note: I am not really advocating any sort of action, and there’s not really any action TO take that isn’t likely to be irresponsible and get people into trouble. I don’t advocate dogpiling someone, or targeting someone. It never ends well. I am not a violent person. But perhaps we can just stop validating them. Stop following them, stop replying to them. Unfollow their page. Don’t respond to their insults (I actually did suggest just replying with random nonsense words, since their comments and actions are about as nonsensical in nature). Not everyone has a thick skin, and not everyone can resist engagement, I know. I just felt like this had gone on long enough that I needed to comment on it, because one thing I profoundly do not like is people harshing other fans’ squee because they are so desperate and needy for attention that they will verbally claw out the eyes of anyone else they see getting it. It’s mean, it’s spiteful, and it’s rude and against everything that makes being a fan enjoyable.

So why make this post? I felt I should get this off my chest, mostly, because it’s been bothering me that someone is being so mean-spirited and selfish about something that I and many others enjoy, and I wanted those who’ve been picked on to know that they’re not alone in having been picked on, and that it’s not okay, not ever, for someone to do this to you. I really don’t like seeing people feel bullied and harassed, and it’s not in my nature to stand aside and not say anything about it. Fraser wouldn’t, and neither will I.

(Oh and if said person sees this page… you’re welcome. I’m glad you realise that this is about you and that you do indeed have a major problem. Maybe time for some self reflection, yes? Or… you can do what you usually do and probably will, which is hurl incomprehensible babbling rage at me and make a lot of vague tweets/facebook posts about how put upon you are and how everyone is bullying you somehow. Your choice. I won’t see them anyway, and don’t care about your opinion, so have at it.)

You may now all return to your regular Tumblring. You are all lovely people.

Why I slapped the signs in the face

Aries: Because you think everyone is in love with you, people aren’t going to bend over backwards to suit all of your needs if you keep being a lazy ungrateful little hoebag. Also, clean your apartment, it smells weird. 

Taurus: Because I know I’m right and you know it too, it is COMMON COURTESY TO HAND OVER THE FUCKING AUX CHORD TO THE PERSON IN THE PASSENGER SEAT. You are so goddamn stubborn and if I have to listen to “I knew you were trouble” ONE MORE TIME… 

Gemini: Because you DO NOT KNOW WHEN TO STOP, YOU HAVE GONE TOO DAMN FAR. I know whatever it is you’re about to do sounds fun, but you’re going to end up dead. and you said she came on to you first but we all KNOW YOU SLEEZY AF. 

Cancer: Because you think you feel more deeply than the rest of us. Emotion is a human thing, you are not the first damn person to feel sad, stop complaining about how unappreciated you are and GET OVER IT. It’s not his fault that he doesn’t like you. 

Leo: I don’t think I have ever seen you sober and you are so fucking loud, I want to slap you just to get you to stop talking over everyone else, people are staring and it’s getting weird. 

Virgo: You are a high stress individual, I wasn’t even thinking about all the things that could go wrong until you PUT THE IDEA IN MY HEAD. Just being around you makes me feel stressed out and you judgy AF, no one cares that much about what you do, just let it go AND CHILL THE FUCK OUT

Libra: Because you think you are hot stuff, trying to out dress us all and show us all up. STOP POSTING PICTURES OF YOUR ART OF FACEBOOK, THE ONLY ONE WHO COMMENTS IS YOUR GRANDMA, I CANNOT STROKE YOUR EGO ALL DAMN DAY. 

Scorpio: Your humor is so dark and dry I don’t know if I want to laugh or cry. I was having a great fucking day until you killed it with one “he got hit by a bus” joke. Also, stop saying “I’d tap that” every time someone attractive walks by, THEY CAN HEAR YOU AND THAT ONE TIME IT WAS MY SISTER. 

Sagittarius: YOU ARE A KNOW IT ALL PIECE OF CRAP, and everyone thinks you’re so bright and kind, but you just a fake hoe. And quit complaining about how you have no one to a group of your friends, it’s rude AF. 

Capricorn: You are too damn real. I know you’re not ashamed of your sex life but I REALLY do not want to hear about what’s been up your butt. .Your only relationship requirements cannot be “she’s into butt stuff.” It’s creepy.

Aquarius: Because you won’t shut the fucking fuck up about how talented and unique you are. You’re just like the rest of us so stop trying to set yourself apart from the rest of humanity. Goddamn. I’ve seen your sketchbook, you’re not that great. 

Pisces: Because you made me feel like I was important and then told me I never was. Fuck you.

I am coming off Haitus.

Here is a detailed explanation on what happened. be warned i will be grafic in this, be saying anti things, and i believe i’m at liberty to. anyone who disagrees did not read. please take the time to understand that this time has been very harsh for me. It put me off my meds, caused me harm, and made my life hell for a short period of time. It has even considered for me to stop being a photographer because I don’t feel safe anymore. Let me take time to thank my friends who called me on the phone at odd hours of the night because they noticed i was gone and sat and listened to me cry for an hour after the initial attack. Read at own risk

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