Do you have a Jaehyun ideal type? :) your reactions/scenarios are the best btw!
Jaeyhyun is a whiny marshmallow. He would like a girl who never ignores him. He wants all her attention. He would date someone who is mature but has a childish and playful side. Someone who brings out the gentleman from him. Someone who makes him smile just by saying hello. Someone elegant and decent in dressing. Someome who smells like cinnamon and honey. Someone who’s presence makes him feel safe and comfortable. Someone who can tolerate his childish side. Someone who understands him. Someone who plays with hair. Someone who pokes his dimples. Someone he can hug like teddy bear. Someone he gossip with. Someone who supports him in every situation. Someone who guides him when he’s wrong. Someone who is a firm decision maker. Someone who gives great advices and kisses. Someone who loves to cuddle. Someone he can wake up at 3am because he’s hungry. Someone he can cook for. Someone he can share his mother’s recipes with. Someone eager to meet his family. Someone caring and filial. Someone who would make a great mother and wife in the future. Someone he can trust. Someone he can idolise and love with all his heart ♥
Thank you for the request, love ♥
I am bemused by the raw stupidity of people nowadaysand need someone to explain to me why does (an examlpe for this particular question, mark my words) a man all of a sudden thinkhe is a woman, why standard pronouns (he/she/it) are a no-no insuch a situation and for that matter, why this extremelly vocalminority is both incredibly agressive and endlessly annoying? I of course do not mean the transsexual folks, only your regular "genius" that considers gender-fluidity a good thing.
My friends and enemies alike, today
is an historic day for you are about to see what happens when your slightly
aggressive affirmer becomes extremely aggressive. I’m so angry, I’m not even
gonna use allcaps cos I only use my allcaps for people who need loud
reassurance, and this transphobic nonsense does not deserve my special allcaps
touch. Or my swears. No swears for you.
I don’t even know where to fudging start with you, but let’s give this a try, shall we?!
For starters, it is not my responsibility to
educate you. Why don’t you just google answers to your questions?! Even Bing
would suffice. I am only taking the time out to do this because if you are
gonna make demands on other people’s time, I’d prefer it be mine over a trans
person who does not need this stuff in their inbox. Not that I believe you
actually want answers. It’s clear from your bio that you just enjoy stirring
people up and then blaming them for being angry about it. Well go ahead and get
on your high horse about me being angry and emotional, because the name of my
blog literally has the word “aggressive” in it, so any attempt to suggest that
my aggression is unnecessary and unwelcome in debate will make you look like
someone who is poking a bear and then surprised when the bear bites. (A bear
does more than just bite, it can take your whole arm off, which may or may not
Secondly, I cannot tell if you are
using the term “transexual folks” because you don’t know that the more
inclusive term “transgender” exists, or if you are using it to refer
specifically to those who prefer the term “transexual”, because they are
the only people you recognise, in your gatekeeping capacity as Arbiter Of
What Counts As Trans. But look! I googled and in two flat seconds I found a
glossary of terms to use when speaking to or about trans people! What is this
devilry that allows me to search the internet for answers to my queries instead
of using the internet to message random blogs in the hope one of them will
explain things to me? What a time to be alive!
Now let’s discuss the question of why
a man “suddenly thinks” he is a woman? Well, for one thing, if someone
currently identifies as a woman, we need to use she/her/hers pronouns (or
alternative pronouns if so requested). And we need to call them a woman,
because they are a woman. Also, how would you know if someone “suddenly thinks”
they are a woman? Are you a psychic? Have you put in a long term effort to hear
and analyse every thought inside their heads to determine the exact moment at
which they “thought” they were a woman?
Guess what?! Just because someone
presented as a man yesterday, and used he/him/his pronouns, this does not mean to say they were personally
identifying as male. They could have been identifying as female in the privacy
of their own mind. Maybe it’s sudden and unexpected for you that they have come
out as a woman, but guess what!? Other people exist outside the context of
your interaction with them! There are a multitude of reasons why a
woman would present as male to you on Monday and come out as a woman on
Tuesday. Maybe that’s “annoying” to you, but you know what’s even more “annoying”?
Having your identity disrespected, being at increased risk for murder, assault
and sexual assault, being asked about your genitals by total strangers… There
are many things much worse than the mild inconvenience to you of people asking
to be treated as the gender they are.
Also, what do you even mean by saying
“standard pronouns” are a “no-no” under such circumstances? Let’s skip over the
super concerning fact that you regard “it” as a standard pronoun that you
believe would be acceptable to use when referring to any person ever, and note
that many trans people do in fact use “standard” pronouns. Why should you get
to decide which pronouns are “standard” anyway? You think “it” is more usual
than, for example, “they”? (Hey look, I didn’t skip over it at all…)
Why do you even care what pronouns a
person uses anyway? If someone wants you to refer to them as They or Zir or
Nir, why not do it? Is it difficult? If Sarah asked you to call her by her
name, Sarah, would you say “No, your outward appearance doesn’t seem like Sarah
to me, I’m going to call you Doris”? Everyone would think you were a massive
jerk and avoid you at all costs. But because you’re discussing a marginalised
group of people, it’s suddenly fine for you to decide which forms of basic
courtesy we’re going to use and which we aren’t?
Okay, your whole message is so
offensive that I’m trying to move through it at speed so bear with me as I skip
to yet another point. You refer to trans people as an “extremely vocal”
minority. By what system are we categorising level of vocalness? Is there a “very
vocal” or a “massively vocal” and where would they fit on a scale? In any case
(and I’m gonna put this in bold for the folks up the back):
When my trans friends talk about
trans issues, I listen, because when a group is marginalised, they are the only
ones who can tell us what they need for equality to be achieved. They are the
only ones who can tell us how we can be better and more inclusive. Trans people
have every right to be vocal, because they have a great deal to say about oppression
and how we as a community need to be doing more and doing better!
I would suggest that when you refer
to trans people as “extremely vocal”, what you really mean is “existing at all”.
Trans people are rudely taking up space in the world and that upsets you enough
to send messages to total strangers on the internet complaining about trans
people having the audacity to exist and ask to be treated with basic respect.
Shall we look at the phrase “incredibly
aggressive”? My interactions with trans people are always polite and friendly.
I have never had a trans person send me messages out of the blue complaining
that cis folks have confusing pronouns. I’ve never had a trans person come into
my space, demanding I spend my time in explaining cis people. The
only people I, a cis woman, ever hear aggression from are other cis people
questioning why I choose to stand by and with trans people in their fight to be
treated with fairness, equality and kindness.
I’m not even going to dignify “excessively
annoying” except by pointing out that all the trans people who come here asking
me to write affirmations for them do so politely and respectfully. They never
rant at me. In fact, I have only ever received ONE annoying message in nearly a
year since creating this blog. And guess whose message it was? YOURS, so maybe
think about not bothering total strangers with your transphobia before you
start flinging around words like annoying…
But oh, this has been such a nice
chat, I’ve almost forgotten about the primary purpose of this blog. It’s about
AFFIRMATION and being supportive of those who are having trouble loving
themselves. I agonised about whether I should even publish and respond to this
message. I weighed up the pros and cons and I asked some trans friends. Should
I, as a cis woman who aspires to being a good ally, use this platform I have to
call out transphobia? Or should I block and ignore, leaving this space safe for
trans people who don’t want to see that kind of negativity? In the end, I was
advised to publish the remarks you have made and put your name to, with
appropriate tagging so that anyone who might be triggered by your disgusting
attempt to troll me could avoid it. Ultimately, this is a positive space full
of positive affirmation, and in the end, the message I have today is ultimately
a positive one. My message is not for you, but for all my followers identifying
as trans and/or non-binary, or agender or gender fluid or demi or any other gender
identity that so offends you by forcing you to accept those who are different
YOUR GENDER IDENTITY IS VALID!!! YOU
ARE VALID!!! AND THOUGH THERE MAY BE TOTAL FUCKING ASSHOLES WHO SEND HATEFUL TRANSPHOBIC
MESSAGES UNDER THE GUISE OF ASKING FOR EDUCATION, YOU REMAIN VALID AND IMPORTANT
AND DESERVING OF LOVE AND AFFIRMATION!!! YOUR FEELINGS MATTER!!! YOUR
BOUNDARIES MATTER!!! YOU FUCKING MATTER, FRIENDS!!!
The asshole who sent me this message
will probably try to provoke me again, so I’ll be blocking them immediately
after I post this. Their views are not fucking acceptable and they do not
deserve a fucking platform. Once is enough, to send a message that
transphobia, no matter how hard you try and package that shit up as debate or
education, is not fucking okay. Not to me and not to the many many cis
followers of this blog, who I have seen reblogging gender-based affirmations,
tagging friends, or just addressing it to their followers in general. I urge
my cis followers to reblog this exceptionally long rant, or post their own
message that makes clear transphobia is not welcome on their dash or in their
This is the first and only time you
will ever see a transphobic message published here. And only because it gives
me a chance to unequivocably state my position and to tell y’all this:
YOUR GENDER IDENTITY IS VALID!!! YOUR
FEELINGS ARE VALID!!! YOU ARE VALID AND IF YOU EVER EVER EVER NEED A REMINDER
OF THAT, THIS BLOG IS A SAFE PLACE WHERE YOU WILL BE RESPECTED AND LOVED!!!
STAY SHINY FUCKING RAINBOW FARTING
CANDY FLOSS SOFT BLUEBERRY SCENTED UNICORNS, EVERYONE!!! (Except you, person
who put this trash in my inbox. You can fuck off.)
- The Slightly Aggressive Affirmer
ETA: Oh, and I strongly advise against visiting the person’s blog to learn more about them. There is a lot of stuff there that could easily trigger someone. Please also don’t send them hate, because they seem like they would enjoy knowing their behaviour upsets people and it’s better to just ignore them.
AND A VERY SPECIFIC TRIGGER WARNING FOR SELF HARM AND RACISM, PLEASE PLEASE DO NOT LOOK, EVEN OUT OF CURIOSITY
Aries will not stand to be ignored. This is a sign that will try to keep communication open and will at least want to know the reason why you are mad or giving them the cold shoulder. When they do decide to move on expect them to be angry towards you and won’t be okay unless you eventually explain why you were cold to them.
Taurus is a sign that can act in two extreme ways if given the cold shoulder. It all depends on if their determination wins or pride. A determined Taurus can become obsessive and won’t leave the individual alone, a prideful Taurus will give the cold shoulder right back and can develop an unforgiving side.
Gemini hates the cold shoulder and finds the lack of communication more frustrating than sad. They will try many things to get you to talk/pay attention to them. From doing more outrageous techniques like talking behind your back or doing something that forces you to talk to them to confronting you head on, a Gemini will find a way to communicate.
Cancer will get very upset at a cold shoulder and will probably ignore a person right back. Trust me, their shoulder can be very, very cold. A Cancer can also hold a grudge so if you ignore them expect them to detach from you and ignore you even longer.
Leo doesn’t come across people that give them the cold shoulder too often but when they do their pride won’t allow them to be patient or understanding. Leo will probably get angry and refuse to talk to the person or try to fix things.
Virgo is the type to keep texting or asking questions to figure out what went wrong when someone is giving them the cold shoulder. They over think the situation and can get very annoyed but also worried.
Libra is good at tip-toeing around someone giving them the cold shoulder and knows how to get someone talking to them. They might “poke the bear” a bit to get a reaction but knows ways to civilly get someone to become warmer.
Scorpio is good at giving the cold shoulder themselves and might know how to get past someone’s walls and coldness. They might use manipulation to get someone to talk to them again.
Sagittarius refuses to cooperate with a cold shoulder and will act like the person isn’t ignoring them or being aloof.
Capricorn can respect a person’s space and independence but when they are given the cold shoulder they see it as disrespectful. They can become hurt and might get very mad at an individual who is being cold.
Aquarius might try to make light of a situation when someone is ignoring them or giving them the silent treatment. If they can get that person to laugh or listen to their story that might feel like a win to them. If lightning the mood doesn’t work they just wait the issue out or might move on from that person.
Pisces knows how to trick someone into talking to them again! The silent treatment or cold shoulder never works with this fish. But at the same time, they are great at being cold if needed.