someone needs to let me know if it has cos i live under a rock

SUPER TEXT LIST! (Texts From Last Night Inspired)

originally from frommemetoyou

  • [text] Are you lost?
  • [text] NO! That was a typo
  • [text] Did you buy it?
  • [text] I think I’m a mermaid
  • [text] I know it’s 3am, but come over and cook for me. 
  • [text] Too lazy to booty call, so have this text instead
  • [text] Need to bury a body, it’s urgent.
  • [text] Are you sure there’s no monsters?
  • [text] It was an accident.
  • [text] lol fuk da police
  • [text] send me a picture and i’ll be home quicker ;)
  • [text] DO NOT READ THE LAST MESSAGE IT WASN’T MEANT FOR YOU
  • [text] Well maybe I broke my tongue!
  • [text] Please tell me you’re free today! I’ve got some big news today.
  • [text] Got a spare ticket, do you want to come?
  • [text] Do you have a spare mankini I can borrow?
  • [text] Is fancy dress allowed at the wedding?
  • [text] I was using my old baby blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
  • [text] We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead… I just rolled off and tapped out. 
  • [text] Like alphabetically, I’d say a t?
  • [text] I’m sorry if throwing up in the back of your dad’s car ruined our friendship :(
  • [text] there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night singing karaoke and drink out of juice cartons. don’t judge me.
  • [text] I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn’t need it today.
  • [text] Do you know where I am?
  • [text] My wedding is in 5 hours and I have no idea where I am. Help!
  • [text] We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would get a piggy back ride home. I’ve never been so broken.
  • [text] Is “head down ass up” an appropriate way to say good morning?
  • [text] That is definitely not healthy, in fact I’m not sure it’s legal to send that sort of picture?
  • [text] There isn’t enough cookie dough ice cream at home, so I’ll be heartbroken tomorrow instead.
  • [text] Not sure if I took a nap or went to another dimension
  • [text] ABORT MISSION! ABORT MISSION! HE IS A TRIPLET, WE DONT NEED TO FIGHT OVER HIM WE CAN HAVE AN ORGY INSTEAD
  • [text] No no don’t leave me, who’s going to walk me home
  • [text] She wheeled me home in a trolley and sad she loved me, I think I win.
  • [text] My dick just got serenaded.
  • [text] I ate the whole wheel of cheese. Help.
  • [text] I’ve been hiding under the bed for the past 20 minutes, and now they’re getting into it and it’s a little too late for me to jump out and surprise them. So expect a live sex updates
  • [text] The fridge is fully stocked. I’m either hallucinating or this is a miracle
  • [text] I need you to help me clean the house because I have visitors in less than an hour???
  • [text] Your brother is at the front door- WHAT DO I SAY?!
  • [text] It’s all fun and games till someone says you’re so pretty they could punch you and they, you know, punch you
  • [text] I’m in A&E but I don’t really know why
  • [text] Went to bed with a 10, just about woke up with a 2 and a half
  • [text] I think I’m officially a homewrecker because his wife just walked in screaming and he said it’s not what it looks like. I mean what else could it look like? I wasn’t trimming his hairs with my mouth?!
  • [text] My night ended with me crying in a gutter, I hate you.
  • [text] He’s decorated the toilet with his urine. I never want to see him ever again, tell him he has 2 minutes to get out of our house.
  • [text] Don’t talk to me! You tried to trade me for a glass of wine and a cigarette!
  • [text] I promise I’ll get everyone to jelly wrestle with us xox
  • [text] I am armed with a crown, a sash and a bouquet of flowers. Don’t test me.
  • [text] I think I got married last night?
  • [text] I think I got married on impulse last night… and after looking a second time, I don’t think i’ve made any mistakes.
  • [text] My mouth tastes like poor choices
  • [text] I didn’t let go of the mechanical bull, but they had to pull me off because… it was rough just the way I like it and I think that showed?
  • [text] If I say it was accidental you’ll just say I’m lying
  • [text] There is an alarming amount of glitter in my… everywhere
  • [text] You’re my hero
  • [text] You’re the worst thing to ever happen to me, thank you
  • [text] Have you ever had a good idea in your life?
  • [text] Are we going to end up in the hospital again?
  • [text] It’s not a good night if I don’t end up crying into your mother’s lap.
  • [text] Mark my words, your dad will be my sugar daddy, he’ll marry me and you’ll have to call me momma bear and I will interrupt your sex life with condoms and condiments.
  • [text] I’m may be allergic to nuts, but not his.
  • [text] She high fived me out of pity
  • [text] You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
  • [text] You just walked in, rated their performance, dragged in three other people to clap for them, then walked back out.
  • [text] You kept calling me baby Jesus and trying to see what wise men had to say about my hair…
  • [text] I am a responsible adult. I tied up my hair before I puked
  • [text] I am a responsible adult, I brought home a lost kitten and let it shit in your room
  • [text] I accidentally talked myself into a threesome, when did I become so smooth?
  • [text] It may or may not have been your sister…
  • [text] It may or may not have been your brother…
  • [text] If you’re not coming over with food, don’t come over at all
  • [text] Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My co-worker is talking to me about her birds having sex again…
  • [text] IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
  • [text] Buy me a helicopter, I will give you the last slice of pizza. pls. this is important. okay maybe the crust?
  • [text] Let’s never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
  • [text] I tried to put lipstick on my eyeballs, help.
  • [text] I told her my cum counts as protein shake and she sent a text to my gran saying I ate her cat.
  • [text] If you don’t fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we’re alone in your room, I’m returning you to the boyfriend store
  • [text] I accidentally sexted your mum, I’m sorry xox
  • [text] There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
  • [text] I feel like you’re pretending I didn’t bail you out of jail last night for trying to staple a cushion to the top of their car so you had a “comfy place to sit”
  • [text] You climbed the fence and then started crying because you were scared of hamsters, I really don’t know what you took, but you need a babysitter.
  • [text]  I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a “let’s fuck” way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of “let me wash your hair” way.
My Universe One

aka if Mags gets to put her paws on Jellal (metaphorically).


I know some of you know, Jellal’s characterization has been a big issue, not only for me but for other ppl in the fandom. I know there is hate towards him and let’s be honest, is not entirely unjustified.

If you gonna bring back a character from the dead, make sure that character makes its prolongued stay count for something. If not, save yourself the grief. And as much as it pains me to say this (like ohmygod, I… urgh!) Jellal was better off dead than getting the shitty treatment his character got. Paraphrasing a friend, he got the potential to have a poweful story on redemption, a journey worthy to be told but instead we got the most pandering, bland one. Waste!

It hurts one as a fan but at the same, the posibilities makes you salivate (or at least me)

So I started writing a list of things I so would love to fix about him, which I divided by arcs, parting from the famous Seven Years that the Fairy Tail core guild members disappeared. 

Let’s keep in mind this is my humble POV, if you want to add something, feel free.


SEVEN YEARS ARC

  • To being with, those seven years will count, not only in terms of character development but maturity too. A 26 years old Jellal living as a fugitive will leave its mark. From a 19 year old teenager who got to be at the peak of the magic world to an adult who hit rock botton and had to claw his way back. However, this gonna be bordering seinen and shonen kids, so not too much darkness, kay?. 
  • Will keep the bit about Jellal recovering his memory in jail and him using that time to piece together the person he once was, realizing sadly that he would never be the same.
  • He will learn about Erza and Fairy Tail most likely died in Tenrou, falling  into despair and closing into himself. Is at that time that Ultear appears to free him and most likely saving him in the moment he needed it most.
  • Jellal and Ultear gonna have a hard time to fix all the shit in between the two. Trust has to be gained and she will have to work hard for it. 
  • Jellal will be free from jail by Ultear but as I said, things don’t go smoothly. Jellal at first goes with what she tells him because he is emotionally and physically too weak. Erza’s and Fairy tail “death” is still fresh and he is trying to adapt to the sudden vortex of changes he has been thrown into; learning how to think by himself and have true freedom or as much as you can have when you are still under the care of the person that manipulated you for 8 years, because Ultear may have changed her views but some habits are hard to kill. So at some point Jellal decides to take his own path and figures out things for himself because even if he owes her his freedom and his life there is a lot of hurt, deceit and mistrust between them to go on together peacefully.
  • Of course Ultear feels like a big failure but can’t help to get where he is coming from and to let him go. She will realize she still can’t get rid of her need to control him (in the form of overprotectiveness, and the insidious conviction of believing she knows what’s good for him) which will send her into further depression and almost made her give up if it wasn’t for Meredy and the fact that the girl needs her. So she forces herself to keep going for her and seek her own answers like Jellal has done for himself (his first act of independence which later on will become a source of pride instead of a source of sadness).
  • Erza and Fairy tail’s dissappearance is the big elephant in the room they avoid to address till the year before Fairy tail came back.
  • Jellal goes through trial and error to learn how to finally live by himself after 8 years of manipulation. Despite the overhelming feelings, his personality remains in the way he is determined to find his own answers as how to live after everything that has happened.
  • He will meet people in the way, and this people will help him to shape who he is, the people of his present but also the people of his past.
  • He is gonna travel all the continent and at some point he will cross to Arakitashia continent, to Alvarez kingdom in his path to find himself.
  • Since he is a highly intelligent man, he also would want to learn more about magic. So that won’t be forgotten, he will put those brains of his to work. It will be key in the arcs to come.
  • Do you remember that Kid Jellal was a leader and someone brave who wanted to help people gain freedom?. Welp, that won’t be thrown under the bus. He was kind and determined, so those traits will show through his need to help those in need.
  • Since he is a wizard saint level mage, he is wanted all across the Ishgar continent. His status as one makes him very dangerous at the eyes of the Magic Council and they fear him as much considering he became a Wizard Saint with just a though projection. His reward is the highest one in all history of Fiore.
  • At some point he crossed paths with Wally and Sho. It’s a rollecoaster, it took time but Jellal apologized properly and they started their first steps to health. Still a long way to go.
  • He finds out where Kagura is. He keeps his distance because he is not ready yet (he knows it because his first though is to offer his life to her and he is hanging to his life for his promise to Erza and Ultear) So, is not the moment but he knows he has to confront her some day.
  • He starts communication with Ultear after three years since he was freed by her (the 4th of the seven years). Since then they keep their communications in code. 
  • He will join Meredy and Ultear at the 5th year of the 7, he had been communicating with Ultear for a whole year now. 
  • Is at this point that Jellal has gotten his own answer. Which does not means everything is resolved, but that he now can give his first steps to the right direction and can look at Ultear in the eyes. 
  • Is at the six year they stablish Crime Sorciere.Their goal is to “destroy” dark guilds and give a chance to start anew to those who want to be free from the darkness within their hearts (this is a shonen xD).
  • Later on Jellal and co infiltrated Era’s dungeons and stablished contact with Oracion Seis, making use of his hability as a politician during his years at the council along Ultear, they convice them to join their cause. They accept almost peacefuly (we’ll get some minor fight over it but nothing serious). - I have to thank @sassyhazelowl for this one.
  • Crime Sorciere name and reputation will spread across Fiore for the amount of dark guilds being destroyed by them. Crime Sorciere offers the fallen guilds these options: they can join them, seek a better honest life or go to jail.


Minor Notes about Ultear (She is fascinating, period)

  • Ultear is second after Jellal with a high reward on her head. 
  • Jella’s departure hurt her a lot and almost gave up but Meredy’s constant presence helped her to hang to her sanity and will to live on.
  • She comes with the idea to create Crime Sorciere to seek redemption in her many talks with Jellal through lacrima. Throught those talks they shape their future guild.
  • She also moved through all the Ishgar continent but never left it. Thanks to her habilities of transformation (which she thaught  to Meredy) she managed to keep a step ahead from their pursuers.
  • She was thorough training Meredy, so no weak pink girl here. She travels with two powerhouses, so she can kick ass… hard.
  • Meredy is her ray of light, period.
  • It’s Jellal who tatooed her back with the new guild mark.
  • Both don’t talk about how the Grimoire Heart guild mark was erased. Not even Meredy knows, just Jellal and Ultear.



DONE! Next arc later!


cc

@sassyhazelowl

@ajerzaaddict

@bellagill92

 

anilengka  asked:

Please help me stop imagining a reunion where Bellamy thinks he has moved on because he thought she was dead all those years. I need your positivity.

Alright, here I come!

I don’t think you’ll like my answer right away, but i need you to hear it (and everyone reading this) but please don’t quit until the end okay? pinky promise?

Yes, there’s a high possibility Bellamy will end up getting together with someone else on the ark during those 6 years, IMO. I don’t know who if Raven or Echo, the interviews make me think Echo but episode makes me think Raven is possible.

BUT, that’s not all “random” there’s a reason I think that and hopefully I can explain in a good way.

So let’s start by the beginning.

1- The writers wanted a time jump.

All this time i’ve been thinking why so many plots are happening and now everything is clear. They wanted to “reboot” the story. Clarke is a grounder, the delinquents are skyppl,the criminals are the delinquents and so it goes. Their entire goal was to get to this time jump. And this was unrelated to bellarke or any other ship, this is what they needed for the plot.

2- Having decided on a time jump……… Bellamy and Clarke could not be together on it.

And this is the best news any of us could ever wish for. This is why when i first heard script spoilers of their possible separation + time jump I was like…… yeah of course. Yes…. they have to do it.

If Bellamy and Clarke’s relationship wasn’t important/ vital (and/or on its finale stage) the writers wouldn’t mind making us miss 6 years worth of development out of them.

Cause that’s what the time jump is for whoever was stuck together for it. We are simply not going to see how all of these relationships will develop on our screens, we’ll get to season 5 and all the changes would have been done. 

Now picture if Bellamy and Clarke had been together 6 years on the ark…. all alone.. i mean, are we really thinking they wouldn’t go full romance there or-? Even worse, what if “they didn’t” and then season 5 began and we find out bellamy and clarke had been stuck together for flipping 6 years and they still didn’t go nonplatonic????

That’ s DEATH my friend. Both options are death. Shipping something for so long, watching it develop in front of your eyes just to miss the most romantic part of it would be beyond terrible…. finding out they did nothing about their feelings - and beginning to doubt they ever exist - is even worse.

So, given the fact that they needed and wanted a time jump, a bellarke separation was inevitable.

You can see that all the “super key” relationships on the show were apart on this time jump btw? Clarke - Abby, Bellamy - Octavia and Bellamy - Clarke.

This is not to say all other relationships aren’t imporant, HECK STOP, it’s just that for those relationships that get more focus, but MAINLY Bellarke - AS ADMITED BY JASON ROTHENBERG HIMSELF as the most important relationship of the show - here :x and x; - The story depends on Bellarke, one thing doesn’t go without the other. On some level, it’s always about them. So when the story pauses, so do they, cause the writers will show to us where they are going every freaking step of the way- didn’t they do it after season 1? after season 2?? even more now! They won’t let us miss 6 years of their relationships, no way. 

Unless their relationship has already developed to its full potential………..

which now you’re asking me what I mean cause Clarke is calling Bellamy for 6 years on a row now and Bellamy main drive to fight for their lives was not letting her die in vain-

yeah, yeah I’m talking about romance.

Cause there is NO WHERE ELSE this story can possibly go. I mean, how the heck will they make Bellamy and Clarke CLOSER still under the platonic realms? Cause lemme tell you, seems pretty impossible to me.

So, again, to me, the separation is a sign this shiz ain’t platonic, they know it, or they’d just let them be together on earth as the “new grounders” and then, since they ain’t romantic, we wouldn’t miss much in 6 years? They’d still be co-leaders, best friends, who die and kill for each other, trust each other with their lives and broken pieces, are each others’ rocks, weaknesses, sanity -all that jazz.

(feel me?) Bellarke is coming)

3- We are watching a drama

And this is where the bad news come. The thing about good story telling is that… writers want to make people watch. And that doesn’t always mean they’ll pull us in by our “good” feelings. Sometimes they want the angst, sometimes they want the anger. They just want us here, feeling like we NEED to see what happens

(well…don’t we right now? So good job the 100 writers)

That being said, i think there are…. 3 ways in which this story can go. 

1- Bellamy for real believes Clarke is dead, he mourns for a long time and then people convince him to live again. And then he does. 

But then he finds out she’s alive and it’s chaos for his new relationship. Cause, lemme say it again, no matter where they stand, Bellamy and Clarke are the mains and so is their relationship. Wherever they go, their interactions are the most important ones. That being said, imagine Bellamy trying to have a relationship with someone but then something happens with Clarke and he worries, or he gets into a real intense argument with Clarke and feels are exposed, or everything they do really brings them back to who they were and this new person is there to watch.

You don’t need to imagine THAT hard, just remember how Finn and Clarke’s relationship started being….a bit more tense after Clarke started getting closer to Bellamy (1x09 hello). Imagine that upped by a million cause that was then and this is now, where Clarke risks the human race for Bellamy and Bellamy risks losing life and limb to save her.


2- Bellamy thinks Clarke is dead but something inside him tells him she’s not so he holds on to that.

I actually see it happening too. Cause I think it’s a very natural reaction? Like he would only believe it if he was down on earth and saw it.

There’s not much to comment there, they’d see each other and the story would go from there. No need to worry about relationships (but i feel like for sure the writers would imply something almost happened with Bellamy and  ~anyone ~cause again, it’s a CW show….any show really, it’s 6 YEARS)

3- Bellamy, believing or not Clarke is dead, doesn’t actually gets into a relationship with anyone but he’s ALMOST AT IT- and then he finds out Clarke is alive.

That’s a way to avoid… idk love triangle tropes i don’t like (and the writers say they don’t either). He’d find Clarke back and well….sooner or later the other person involved would end up telling Bellamy he had always loved clarke or some less cheesy version of that.

And finally, most love stories that involve time gaps at least at some point (e.g: the notebook, veronica mars, dawson’s creek, once upon a time on several occasions haha) DO involve one of the sides - or both - “falling” (ahem being ahem) with someone else. Mostly because it creates angst, it feels more real (can’t argue there?) and ultimately it shows some connections are stronger than others and the two characters that were originally separated really were meant to be, and their” love overcomes” and all that shiz.

So if you’re worried Bellamy will move on, be worried it will mostly piss us off, but not about Bellarke (i don’t see a reason for that with the PLOT info we have at the moment - in my opinion), cause they are the “epic love story” (*fightmee*) being separated here, so the story is about them.

here is a text post that isn’t exactly about that but amazing to cheer anyone up about the time jump:http://bellamyblakesprotectionsquad2k17.tumblr.com/post/161043775714/because-i-know-some-of-yall-will-need-hope-right


HOPE I HELPED!!! REALLY

Writing Prompt Masterlist

Prom Starter Sentences
-“Are you going to prom?”
-“He/She is definitely not gonna ask me.”
-“I hate dresses.”
-“I heard you’re going to prom with ______. That’s cute.”
-“I just really want him/her to ask me to prom.”
-“I was wondering if you would go to prom with me.”
-“I’ve narrowed it down to five dresses!”
-“Prom?”
-“Prom sounds incredibly stupid.”
-“We need to shop for prom dresses.”
-“Will you be my date to prom?”
-“You’re going with the person that I wanted to ask me to prom…”

Song Lyric Based Starter Sentences

-“After all that we have been through…”
-“All I wanted was to be wanted.”
-“All you’re ever gonna be is mean.”
-“Don’t hate me cause I’m beautiful.”
-“Good to see you’re still beautiful.”
-“Gravity hasn’t started to pull, quite yet I bet you’re rich as hell.”
-“How can you stand to be so cruel?”
-“I am not a child now, I can take care of myself.”
-“I don’t understand why you have to always be gone.”
-“I don’t wanna lose you now.”
-“I never stopped.”
-“I really feel that I’m losing my best friend.”
-“I wish I’d never grown up.”
-“I’m giving up on you.”
-“I’m my own worst enemy.”
-“I’m your’s.”
-“It’s personal.”
-“Love was when I loved you.”
-“Now I realize that I really did love you.”
-“Please don’t try so hard to say goodbye.”
-“Say something.”
-“Some nights I wish that this all would end.”
-“Tell me you love me, then come back and haunt me.”
-“This has nothing to do with you.”
-“This one’s for you and me.”
-“We don’t get another chance.”
-“What do you want from me?”
-“When I’m with you, I’m so close to feeling alive.”
-“You don’t know how lovely you are.”
-“You don know what you’ve got till it’s gone.”
-“You swore you’d never tell.”

Text message starters
-Are you lost?

-NO! That was a typo

- Did you buy it?

- I think I’m a mermaid

-I know it’s 3am, but come over and cook for me. 
-Too lazy to booty call, so have this text instead

-Need to bury a body, it’s urgent.

-Are you sure there’s no monsters?

-It was an accident.

-lol fuk da police

-send me a picture and i’ll be home quicker ;)

-DO NOT READ THE LAST MESSAGE IT WASN’T MEANT FOR YOU

-Well maybe I broke my tongue!

-Please tell me you’re free today! I’ve got some big news today.

-Got a spare ticket, do you want to come?

-Do you have a spare mankini I can borrow?
-Is fancy dress allowed at the wedding?

-I was using my old baby blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants

-We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead… I just rolled off and tapped out. 

-Like alphabetically, I’d say a t?

-I’m sorry if throwing up in the back of your dad’s car ruined our friendship :(

there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night singing karaoke and drink out of juice cartons. don’t judge me.
-I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn’t need it today.

-Do you know where I am?

-My wedding is in 5 hours and I have no idea where I am. Help!

-We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would get a piggy back ride home. I’ve never been so broken.

-Is “head down ass up” an appropriate way to say good morning?

-That is definitely not healthy, in fact I’m not sure it’s legal to send that sort of picture?

-There isn’t enough cookie dough ice cream at home, so I’ll be heartbroken tomorrow instead.

-Not sure if I took a nap or went to another dimension

-ABORT MISSION! ABORT MISSION! HE IS A TRIPLET, WE DONT NEED TO FIGHT OVER HIM WE CAN HAVE AN ORGY INSTEAD

-No no don’t leave me, who’s going to walk me home

-She wheeled me home in a trolley and sad she loved me, I think I win.

-My dick just got serenaded.

-I ate the whole wheel of cheese. Help.

-I’ve been hiding under the bed for the past 20 minutes, and now they’re getting into it and it’s a little too late for me to jump out and surprise them. So expect a live sex updates

-The fridge is fully stocked. I’m either hallucinating or this is a miracle

-I need you to help me clean the house because I have visitors in less than an hour???

-Your brother is at the front door- WHAT DO I SAY?!

-It’s all fun and games till someone says you’re so pretty they could punch you and they, you know, punch you

-I’m in A&E but I don’t really know why

-Went to bed with a 10, just about woke up with a 2 and a half

-I think I’m officially a homewrecker because his wife just walked in screaming and he said it’s not what it looks like. I mean what else could it look like? I wasn’t trimming his hairs with my mouth?!

-My night ended with me crying in a gutter, I hate you.

-He’s decorated the toilet with his urine. I never want to see him ever again, tell him he has minutes to

get out of our house.

-Don’t talk to me! You tried to trade me for a glass of wine and a cigarette!

-I promise I’ll get everyone to jelly wrestle with us xox

-I am armed with a crown, a sash and a bouquet of flowers. Don’t test me.

-I think I got married last night?

-I think I got married on impulse last night… and after looking a second time, I don’t think i’ve made any mistakes.

-My mouth tastes like poor choices

-I didn’t let go of the mechanical bull, but they had to pull me off because… it was rough just the way I like it and I think that showed?

-If I say it was accidental you’ll just say I’m lying

-There is an alarming amount of glitter in my… everywhere

-You’re my hero

-You’re the worst thing to ever happen to me, thank you

-Have you ever had a good idea in your life?

-Are we going to end up in the hospital again?

-It’s not a good night if I don’t end up crying into your mother’s lap.

-Mark my words, your dad will be my sugar daddy, he’ll marry me and you’ll have to call me momma bear and I will interrupt your sex life with condoms and condiments.

-I’m may be allergic to nuts, but not his.

-She high fived me out of pity

-You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask

-You just walked in, rated their performance, dragged in three other people to clap for them, then walked back out.
-You kept calling me baby Jesus and trying to see what wise men had to say about my hair…

-I am a responsible adult. I tied up my hair before I puked

-I am a responsible adult, I brought home a lost kitten and let it shit in your room

-I accidentally talked myself into a threesome, when did I become so smooth?

-It may or may not have been your sister…

-It may or may not have been your brother…

-If you’re not coming over with food, don’t come over at all

-Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My co-worker is talking to me about her birds having sex again…

-IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS

-Buy me a helicopter, I will give you the last slice of pizza. pls. this is important. okay maybe the crust? -Let’s never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.

-I tried to put lipstick on my eyeballs, help.

-I told her my cum counts as protein shake and she sent a text to my gran saying I ate her cat.

-If you don’t fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we’re alone in your room, I’m returning you to the boyfriend store

-I accidentally sexted your mum, I’m sorry xox

-There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro

-I feel like you’re pretending I didn’t bail you out of jail last night for trying to staple a cushion to the top of their car so you had a “comfy place to sit”

-You climbed the fence and then started crying because you were scared of hamsters, I really don’t

know what you took, but you need a babysitter.

-I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a “let’s fuck” way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of “let me wash your hair” way.

Miscellaneous
-A family of tiny people live in an old violin, forgotten at the back of the instrument shop.
-2 asexual aromantic best friends who have a best friend marriage for tax benefits
- Characters wake up on their18th birthday with the first words their soulmate will say to them tattooed on their body.
-An angel girl who’s girlfriend is a demon
-A ghost that catches an item thats flying towards someone right before it hits their face so people start to think that person can make stuff float around and the ghost goes around and helps.
-Everyone is already dead and enjoying the afterlife but the events start to happen and people start to revive
-The little bruises and cuts that show up on your body seemingly out of nowhere are actually little injuries that happened to your soulmate and you get the same marks on your skin as them
-good female character turns evil, she dresses in sensible jeans and combat boots and a comfy jacket instead of a bondage-inspired outfit that is 2 strips of leather and a thong.
-Your door bell rings and its a person from an alternate universe “”I just want you to know that you are my favourite book character and I know how it ends and I wanna change it.”
-The main character slowly falls in love with the reader.
-A clock that counted down until the moment you die
-A stereotypically popular cheerleader who has a crush on the weird girl
-Chest glows when you meet your soulmate.
Optional: School jock and the nerd he beats up every day
-A young girl is kidnapped and forced to marry a demon king and takes over the underworld and the surface world with a cold iron fist
-A person who falls in love with death and continuously commits murder in order to spend more time with them
-Genderfluid twins Jane and John deciding who is going to be John and who is going to be Jane each day.
-Dragon protecting princesses because of abusive parents or forced marriage. The dragon teaching the princess how to protect herself, princess returning home riding her trusty dragon friend and killing everyone who tries to control her
-”Accidentally broke into your house/apartment because my friend lives next door to you and I was in the area, drunk, and I thought I was climbing into the right window and falling asleep on the right couch (and i didwonder when my friend got two cats but I didn’t question it) So now I’m hungover and shirtless in your living room so um hi howya doin”
-When you killed someone you gained their best trait
Optional: what they thought was their best trait.
-Accidentally picked the wrong seats in an airplane/theater

-Hugged the wrong person from behind
-Wrong person waved back
-Took the wrong coffee order
-Walking into the wrong dorm room
-Sat down in the wrong class
-Called the wrong number
-Got into/waved at the wrong car
-Took the wrong luggage

Smutty
- The partner that’s super loud and commanding and draws all the attention in public is the one that whines quietly as they’re pinned down to the mattress and forced to take what’s given to them while their partner whispers filthy things into their ear
-”I think you’re cute. cute as in I wanna hear what you sound like while experiencing an orgasm”
-Who’s louder?

-More experimental?

-Who is more likely to be caught masturbating?
-Lights on.

-Lights off.

-Who comes first?
-Who’s more submissive?

-Initiater?
-More sensitive?
-Most patient?
-Shared kinks?

Couple Situation
-What music they enjoy?

-How much time they spend getting ready in the morning?

-Favourite thing to collect?

-Left or right handed?

-Favourite sport?

-Favourite kind of weather?

-Favourite tourist thing to do?

-What they smell like?

-How they sleep?
-Which one is abysmal at roller skating and has to hold onto the other
-Gets hiccups every time they drink something fizzy

-Always joins the group dances at the skating rink

-Listens to new songs on loop until the other can’t stand it

-Tags the other in embarrassing photos without asking first

-Had a short-lived interest in learning the ukulele

-Keeps posting memes on facebook

-Shops for groceries
-Kills the spiders

-Comes home drunk at 3 AM
-Remembers to feed the fish
-Decorates the house

-Initiates duets

-Falls asleep first

Date night Starters
-Slow-dancing to a love song, with Person A quietly singing the words in  Person B’s ear.
-Bed and Breakfast
-Dinner at a fancy restaurant
-Hotel stay for the night

-Auburn home game and away game

-Concert and dinner (his choice)

-Concert and dinner (my choice)

-Weekend away

-Coupes Massage

-Chopped Challenge (like the television show on FoodNetwork)

-Fondue and Almost Famous

-Takeout and board games

-1,000 piece puzzle and pizza

-Football game and nachos

-Popcorn and a chick-flick

-Crosswords and breakfast for dinner

-Make a dessert together

-FridayNight Lights marathon

-Taking a bubble bath together

-Homemade pizzas and an Italian movie

-Dinner and a movie (my choice and his choice)

-Laser tag and go carts

-Mexican night at Cocina Superior 

-Drive-In date

-Dessert only date

-Window shopping for the house

-Bowling
-The Melting Pot

-Coffee Date

8

11/74 Favorite Jack and Kate Moments

“My very first sling…” | The Moth

E:  “The Moth” is one of those Jate staples. Literally. If you can’t walk away from that episode convinced that Kate was in love with Jack after like fifteen minutes of knowing him, and that everyone else knew that they were kind of “together” in some sense, then I’d say that the noggin’ needs a serious scan.

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pilferingapples  asked:

More of the fakest fake dating story? Marius, Grantaire and Bahorel continuing to horrify Gillenormand is always fantastic. (and happy birthday!)

Please enjoy this Serious Work of Serious Literature, written entirely under the influence of the Plague (or possibly a head cold)

(original post)


Marius glared up at his grandfather’s house. The house did not glare back, but not, Marius suspected, from lack of trying. He walked on past, gloomily surveying the street around him.

The morning was sunny and beautiful and horribly terrible. A pair of birds flew by, singing to each other. Marius contemplated throwing a rock at them. Life was terrible and cruel.

“Life is terrible and cruel,” he announced to no one in particular. The birds continued to sing, rudely ignoring his pronouncement. They were probably laughing at him. Did birds laugh?

A woman walking by took one look at him and pulled her child closer to her. Marius supposed he must look out of place on this street with his poor, worn clothes. His grandfather would never listen to him. No one would. The passersby were probably laughing at him for daring to come to this part of town.

That man over there was definitely laughing at him.

Marius prepared a haughty glance – dignified yet cutting – before his brain caught up with him and identified the man.

“Ho there, Pontmercy!” Bahorel called out. He had an arm around the nearly prone figure of Grantaire, who was leaning against him with all the attention and vigor of a corpse. “What are you doing here?”

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anonymous asked:

Asexuality is not biologically normal, go to a doctor, you're probably suffering from a disease/dysfunction that alters or suppresses your sexual desire. Not trying to shame you here, but it's sad to see when people do not know this. It might be a part of your identity, but if you see someone with a broken leg you wouldn't think "oh I can't tell them to go to a doctor that's brokenleg shaming", well same thing here. The brain is physical matter, too.

do you know what i do, anon? i’m a mail clerk, at a law office. do you know what mondays are like for me? absolute hell. and i work hard, anon, for seven long hours, and then i come home. to this. and let me tell you, i do not have nearly the patience or politeness for this kind of bullshit that my co-mod does, so you sure as shit picked the wrong day to do this

first things first, though: FUCK YOU

secondly, i have to wonder if people *coughassholescough* like you actually wait around and check to see my answer. or if you spend your free time hunting down ace-blogs to leave anonymous messages like this, and then fuck off along your merry way, all self-righteous and smug in your bigotry, without giving a damn what kind of damage you may have done

because here’s the thing? you don’t care about me—or any asexual person for that matter. you don’t even know me, you don’t know anything about me or my situation or my life. you know fuck all, so what the fuck entitles you to think it’s acceptable to do this? you know jack shit, and the fact that you don’t even have the guts to do this off-anon tells me everything i need to know about just how “concerned” you are

so fuck off with your “it’s sad”—it’s none of your fucking business is what it is. you are an absolute fucking stranger to me. do you even comprehend that? like, what the fuck are you even trying do? tell me that, anon? what are you trying accomplish with this? what are you expecting to happen?

do you honestly think i’m going to take medical advice from a stranger? who knows literally nothing about me except my sexual orientation? who calls me a biological abnormality? how fucking entitled and narcissistic are you that you honestly fucking think this is going to do anything except piss me off? or is that why you did it anonymously?

let me enlighten you. i have mental illness. i have been seeing a therapist since i was 8; i have been seeing psychiatrists since i was 11; i currently take four different medications a day. i am goddamn well aware of what it’s like to have jacked up shit with my brain, and let me tell you, my asexuality is not part of that. so don’t you fucking come at me with that “brain is physical matter too” bullshit concern trolling

yeah, that’s right. there’s a word for people like you and what you do. strangers who make it their business to force their narrow-minded morals on others under the guise of “concern.” it’s the exact same shit used against disabled people, mentally ill people, fat people, chronically ill people, women, and yeah queer and trans people, and it’s nothing new. literally nothing you have said to me here has not been told to me and every other asexual in existence

in fact, it’s disturbingly similar to what my own mother said when i came out to her. you’re not trying to “shame” me, huh? well, you missed the fucking mark, big time. because that is exactly what this is, some fucking stranger thinking they have a right to their “opinion” on my existence, that they can invalidate all i have been through with “it’s something wrong with your brain”

do you know how many asexuals exist in the world, anon? over 1% of the world’s population. that’s over 7 fucking billion people. and you wanna dismiss that with “biological abnormality” and “disease or dysfunction”

do you have any fucking idea what i’ve been through? what asexual people go through? do you have any fucking clue what it’s like to live feeling like there’s something wrong with you? feeling isolated and misunderstood? feeling like something’s broken inside you?

and then finally, finally you find out that there’s a word for you. that you’re not wrong or broken, that what you feel is valid. and that other people feel it too! to finally realize you’re not alone, to finally have community and to finally know how to explain what you feel

can you scrounge up even a fucking ounce of empathy and just imagine what kind of hell that is? and you have the fucking audacity, the sheer entitled gall to come into a stranger’s inbox and leave this bullshit, all nice and safe and anonymously

and you know what? so what if you’re right? so fucking what if it is something wrong in my brain? what goddamn fucking business is it of yours if something’s wrong with me? i don’t even know who you fucking are, not even a url or anything. you are a complete fucking stranger. try to grasp that concept, of what it would be like if some stranger threw a rock at your window and told you that you were sick and abnormal and diseased

did it ever occur to you that maybe i’m perfectly happy with my asexuality? that i’m content with how i feel, and that i’ve accepted myself? did the fact that i fucking mod an asexuality-centered blog where i give advice to questioning aces not even fucking register in your brain, that maybe i’m pretty damn confident with who i am and that your comments are going to have zero fucking impact on me?

open your fucking eyes a little and learn to fucking listen to other people when they talk about their experiences. and most importantly, believe them and support them instead of invalidating them with pseudo-science bullshit

if you ever have a genuine question about asexuality, i’d be more than glad to answer it. but until then, go fuck yourself with a cactus and learn to mind your own goddamn business

~Mod Q

Leaving (A Magcon One-Shot)

        Twelve boys and a girl. Lined up on the stage. Tears welled up in their eyes. Sparkling blue, deep brown, beautiful hazel, and wonderful, wonderful green. Then you hear a voice.

        "Thank you for following us. To DC, Atlanta, Orlando and Dallas.“ He chuckles and hands the mic off to another voice.

        "Thank you for supporting us. 13 weirdos from ages 13 to 20.” He practically tosses the mic to the next boy.

        "You guys have been there for us, through hate, bad relationships, good relationships, graduations, marriages, and even births.“ He laughs, his contagious laugh ang the girls and guys wipe their tears and laugh with him.

        "You guys stuck with me. Smiled through my horrible rapping and laughed along with my craziness, even when everyone else thought I was totally mental.” He chuckles, hands off the mic, and steps back.

        "Guys, you smiled through every single piece of hate that was sent towards me. Some thought I was too sweet, too kind, or too quiet. But you guys convinced me that, just like you all, I am beautiful. Wonderful. Amazing.“ He sniffles and passes on the mic. The other 8 make their speeches and finally, the first speech maker steps up.

        Under the light of a spotlight, he speaks with tears running down his cheeks. "I’m Cameron Alexander Dallas. But you guys know me as Cam.” He smiles and blows kisses at the crowd. Then he laughs and says, “Call me Dallas… Cameron Dallas.”

        Another spotlight shines and the next boy steps forward. “My name is Hamilton Nash Grier. But you guys know me as Nash.” He laughs and smiles, a beautiful smile that reaches his sparkling blue eyes. “Zayummmmm, you got a bae? Or nah? You tryna date? Or nah?” He laughs and points to a girl in the front row.

        The next spotlight shines on a boy with glasses and a SnapBack. His tears are already rushing down his face. “I am Carter McCoy Reynolds. You all know me as Cahtah.” He chuckles and then says, “You don’t have to be funny to make vines. Just be yourself. I want you all to carry on the memories that Magcon has created. Make vines the remember the times we’ve shared. I love you.”

        The next boy steps up. “I’m Matthew Lee Espinosa. But you guys know me as Matt.” His laughs and tears mix together in a fit of laughter and sadness. “Sorry about that guys. I only have one thing left to say to you all. A lot of people will do whatever they can just to bring you down. So just don’t pay attention. Live simply so others can simply live.”

        8 others make speeches and end with memorable quotes. But there is one boy left. “Hi guys. My name is Shawn Mendes and I’m going to do a cover of Believe by Justin Bieber. I hope you enjoy.” He smiles and starts singing.

        "I don’t know how we got here/ We knew it wouldn’t be easy/ But your faith in us was so clear/ It didn’t matter how many times we got knocked on the floor/ You knew one day we would be standing tall/ And just look at us now/ Cos’ everything starts from something/ And something would be nothing/ Nothing if your heart didn’t dream with us/ Where would we beeeee if you didn’t believe/ There were days when we were just broken/ There were nights when we were doubting ourselves/ But you kept our hearts from falling/ It didn’t matter how many times we got knocked on the floor/ You knew one day we would be standing tall/ Just look at us now/ Cos’ everything starts from something/ And something would nothing/ Nothing if your heart didn’t dream with us/ Where would we beeeee if you didn’t believe.“

        After Shawn finishes singing, he smiles and waves at the crowd. "I love you guys so much.” Then, the Jacks step up to the front of the stage. “My name is Jack Gilinsky. And my name is Jack Johnson.” Simultaneously, they say,“And we’re Jack and Jack. Most of you guys have been there for us since Distance, Flights, and Paradise. Others are new fans, but you probably still know these songs. Jack and I have a surprise for you guys.” Then Jack and Jack sing for one last time on the Magcon stage.

        "Missed calls and ignored texts/ And late night I’m staying up stressing/ Girl I’ve got you on my mind/ Swear this happens everytime/ But what about our last fight/ Yeah, I know it happened last night/ You can put that in the past, right/ I’m just tryna live the fast life/ But what’s love without trust girl/ And what’s love without lust girl/ I’ve been thinking bout us girl/ I’ve been thinking bout/ Flights to LA, trips to Paris/ They could talk but we couldn’t care less girl, whoa/ Let you shop in New York, drink in London/ It’s all the same,girl/ As long as you’re coming/ Said she’s seen it all before,right/ But what about tonight/ Won’t you open your eyes/ Take a look outside/ At the open skylight/ She tells me it’s a little cold out/ Don’t worry we’ll fly south/ Come with me girl/ I’ll let you know what I’m all about/ Tell me where you wanna go/ We can leave make it feel like home/ If you’re ready let me know/ And we’ll fly to parts unknown/ Some people all about the dollar bill/ It’s quite a shame that it ain’t really how you ought to feel/ It’s all the same everyday how you gotta deal/ With all the pain but in time it is gonna heal/ We never change for anybody/ That would just be insane/ Light a flame/ Rock it back and forth/ Let me take you away/ With my words I heard someone kicked you to the curb/ Keep your head held high like you’re chiefin’ on the herb/ It’s absurd/ The way the dollar rules life/ Two types of people on this earth/ Who’s right one side’s/ Controlled by material things/ Others live for experience and everything it brings/ I’m the king of the latter/ Sing about what matters/ At the ball park with my friends/ Swing batter batter/ Just another summers day/ Watch the sun fade away/ All I’ve gotta say is we’ll never change.“

        Carter stands up. "I think that one last time, we need to do this. We need to do this for the fans. Mahogany. Hit it.” The sound of Lip Gloss by Lil Mama is heard throughout the venue. Carter, Matt, Taylor and Dillon stand up and start doing the dance. After the song is over, Carter stands up to speak again. “I love you all. I hate to end this but I know a certain quote. I used to hear this all the time, from everybody. People used to ask me ‘If good things lasted forever, would we appreciate how precious they are?’ And I think they’re right. If Magcon lasted forever, would you all still appreciate the hard work that’s put into it? Or would it just become another normality? So I ask you to cherish the hard work that was put into Magcon. We love you.” Carter turns around to see that the rest of the family has become a circle. He joins the circle and they all put their hands in. “1,2,3,4,5! We love you, Boston! We love you all!”

        The crowd and family shuffle out to the sound of Buckwild. “Bye man.” Carter pulls Matt into a man hug. On another side of the room, Taylor and Dillon are talking. “Are you really going to LA, Dil?” “I think I am. Make a name for myself, see if my rapping skills are as good as I think they are. I’ll see you around, Tay.” Dillon-gone. Cam, Hayes, Nash leave together to find their way back to their shared home. “Carter, you coming?” Nash asked. “Don’t wait. I’ll get back.” Carter responds. 4 down, 9 to go. Mahogany and Jacob leave together, Mahogany in tears and Jacob close to bursting. 7 left. Taylor has no reason to stay so he leaves with Aaron and Sam. 4 left. The Jacks leave together and leave Matt and Carter together. “Carter?” Matt asks. “Yeah, bro?” Carter replies.

        "Why did it have to end so fast?“

        "Bro, it’s been years.”

        "But it feels like Sam and Jc were touring with us yesterday!“

        "We’ll still see each other. Me, Cam, Nash, Hayes, we’ll hang with you and Tay and Aaron and Shawn when he comes back.”

        "But what about the Jacks? Dillon? Sam? Jacob? Mahogany?“

        "The only people who are leaving are the Jacks and Dil. The Jacks’ll come back after they graduate and Dil might not even make it. We can still visit him and you know LA is the place that we’ll all end up if we really wanna make it in the acting business. And I know you do.”

        "I do, but without my friends? I don’t wanna do this, or anything, without my friends!“

        "How do you know that you’ll end up without us? Maybe we’ll end up I’m the same movie, the same show. You never know, Matt.”

        "Carter! Out of everyone, you should be the person that understands what I’m saying!“

        "I do, Matt. I know you’ll miss them. I’ll miss them, too. I’m not unsympathetic, I’m just not as upset as you are.”

        "Why not, Carter? Why won’t you miss our friends? Why won’t you miss any of this?“

        "I never said that, Matt. I said I wasn’t as upset as you are. 26 and MAGCON would have never agreed with each other. It was hard being here when all 26 wanted to do was get us out. You know that Bart needs to shove that money up his ass. Being away from you and the rest of my brothers is going to be the hardest thing I’ll ever do, but I’m going to get through it and so are you. I’m gonna miss you, Matt, but I gotta go now. See you later.”

        "Bye, Carter.“

        After Carter leaves, Matt hangs around for a few minutes before walking over to the wall that he’s taken so many pictures against. He sees all of the things fans have written.

        "Carter, I love you!”
        "Hayes, we’re meant to be!“

        And he adds another one.

        A lot of people will do whatever they can just to bring you down. So just don’t pay attention. Live simply so others can simply live. -Matthew Espinosa, June 17, 2024.

fic: Is it really so bad to see your own future?

Nine, Ten/Rose

Ao3

He’s sitting in the corner of the pub, minding his own business and nursing a bottle of beer when he sees her.

When he sees her and…bollocks.

Someone else. His hearts clench in fear. She doesn’t look that much older than she does now. She’s going to leave him. Soon, if he’s any judge of the way she looks at this man. She looks at him like she’s known him awhile; there’s trust in her eyes. And…love?

The Doctor tightens his grip on his drink and tries not to storm over there.

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kiddilunafanfiction  asked:

Sterek Au: In which Fireman!Derek got hurt on the job and Cop!Stiles was not happy to see him get hurt

As soon as Stiles pulls up to the burning building, he flings himself out of his car in time to see Derek run into the building. 

“Derek!” Stiles shouts, running towards the scene, but Boyd, Derek’s fireman friend, holds him back by the arm. 

“There’s a kid still in there. Derek’s going to find him.”

“That building looks like it’s going to collapse!” Stiles shouts, shrugging off Boyd’s grip. “There’s no safe way for him to get out if-”

As if cued, the screeching sound of metal and cracking sound of burning wood screams across the area as the ceiling gives in on the left side of the building, crushing part of the top floor. 

Stiles’ heart is beating rapidly, breathing unsteady, and his eyes fall to the door where Derek had disappeared. Boyd is still at his side within arm distance if Stiles tried to run again, and he says, “Derek is smart,” but it hardly calms Stiles’ nerves.

Shit. They were gonna start a family. Stiles was excited for all the domestic stuff, like washing dishes together and fighting about grocery prices. They had a dog, for fucks sake. 

And Stiles’ wasn’t ready to give that up. 

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The Lighthouse Gem and Ronaldo: the hidden story of loneliness and heroism.

Strap yourselves in this is gonna be a long one.

I think its not unfair to say that superficially at least Ronaldo is a joke character. Someone seeking the truth but always looking at the evidence in front of him and coming to the wrong conclusion or missing the point.

So consistently does Ronaldo miss the point its actually very spooky when he prophesied the shows plot in “Keep beach city Weird”. To Quote “ Polymorphic sentient rocks” followed by “They’re here to hollow out the Earth! It’s part of the Great Diamond Authority! They’ll take on any form…”

For someone as disastrously wrong as Ronaldo this is actually very on track to what we knew at that point and what we later learn. The Gems are Pollymorphic sentient space rocks. The process by which the Kindergarten creates new gems is akin to hollowing out the earth as the natural internal resources are consumed. And at that point we had no clue to the Great Diamond Authority, hell Ronaldo pretty coined the term for them in the fandom. 

Ronaldo is always wrong but here he was near enough spot on. And to be fair while he usually reaches the wrong conclusions, he does seem to be the only human who is actually looking and is aware that all in Beach is not normal. he is the only one not directly connected to the gems (i.e Greg and Connie) that seems to process all the strange goings on in the world. 

Why is this? why tucked up in his little lighthouse hideout with his news paper clipping does Ronaldo suddenly predict the coming invasion by the Homeworld Gems?

is it perhaps his long (though unconscious) association with the Lighthouses other long term resident…

There’s been some speculation about this Gem. I personally have questioned how it has been right above the Crystal Gem’s heads and they not notice. Some speculate due to its size, shape and colour that its in fact Blue Diamond.

Who ever this gem was she was extremely powerful capable of engineering a massive amount of reality bending despite not having a physical body during her attack on Lars during “Horror Club”.

I also found in interestingly how specifically she was gunning for Lars during that episode. Of course the conclusion reached was that the gem felt like she was under attack fro Lars and was lashing out. but considering how corrupted gem usually act isn’t it strange that the gem only targeted Lars when they normally attack indiscriminately? Ronaldo was present when she was initially ‘attacked’ but Gem never lashed out at him during all the times he’s practically lived there.

Lets also remember the gems broke down a walll that time.

If a simple name scratching triggered an assault then why didn’t this? if the Lighthouse is acting like the gems body this would definitely count as a grievous wound.

But what if she didn’t perceive the Crystal Gems as a threat. More specifically what if she didn’t perceive them as a threat to Ronaldo? In monster buddies we saw that the Centipeedle, though corrupted, became attached to Steven and tries to protect him, but instinctively lashes out when she see’s the Gem weapons as she thinks she and (possibly) Steven are under attack.  

If Lighthouse was just interested in revenge on Lars why wait so long before attacking? why not attack the moment he’s through the door?

With this in mind consider this evidence from “Horror Club”. 

  1. Steven senses the gem is hurting and obsessed right before the mouth appears.
  2. The gem replays the childhood scene between Ronaldo and Lars when its knocked out the wall.
  3. Steven then senses that the Gem was lonely before he bubbled it.
  4. The Gems apparent co-operation with Ronaldo   

Firstly it isn’t specifically stated the gem is obsessed with Lars. what if instead she’s obsessed with Ronaldo, someone who has been in close proximity to her for nearly a decade. 

Secondly, if the hologram was intended to show why it was attacking in retaliation why would it bother showing the lead up and aftermath of Lars and Ronaldo fight? Could it instead be trying to show it thought it was protecting Ronaldo from Lars?

Thirdly to say the Gem was lonely is no great leap in Logic. God knows how long she’s been trapped without a body, let alone stuck in the lighthouse wall. her Powers indicate she would have been somewhat aware of what was going on around her. the lighthouse appears to be automatic in its current format so its not like people would have visited often, except Ronaldo.

Lastly, although Ronaldo thought it was a poltergeist the Gem did seem to be responding to him. When he asked for a sign the gem manipulated the pendant thingie. When he asked for more it started throwing stuff around the room. then when Ronaldo anger at Lars was boiling over it formed the Mouth to allow Ronaldo to dispose of his ‘enemy’.    

So how does this all tie together and relate to Ronaldo’s prediction??

Allow me to paint a narrative for you:

The Lighthouse Gem; be she fallen Crystal Gem, Homeworld Gem or Blue Diamond herself has been trapped and alone for Millennia. Stuck unable to regenerate she’s had to sit by herself as corruption digs at her mind.

Then one day two new people move into the lighthouse. She looks at these newcomers and sees kindred spirits. They have an interest in the paranormal, something she likes due to her origin and powers. And they are lonely and outsiders, something she empathises so very deeply after so long trapped, maybe it was something she dealt with in her own lifetime.

Then Lars ‘attacks’ her and she lashes out instinctively. Next thing she knows Lars is ‘attacking’ Ronaldo before storming out. 

Years roll by and Lighthouse become very attached to her new Resident. Ronaldo provides indirect company and a view into the outside world. She cares for this goofy little human who keeps her company and although she can’t risk using her powers directly, maybe sure to the effects of corruption overtaking her, but she can use her reality warping powers to coax his mind towards the truth about the world he lives in. Sure it doesn’t work quite as intended but its something.

When “Horror Club” rolls around suddenly after so many years Lars is back within her sphere. She begrudges Lars for hurting her and Ronaldo so long ago but is initially willing to tolerate his presence. However Lars bad attitude and constant mockery cause her to snap and attack to protect Ronaldo. the use of her abilities to such a degree and after so long tip her mind into a corrupted rage which is only broken when Steven destroys the wall.

 Realising what she’s done Lighthouse projects the flashback to try and explain why she did what she did. Content Steven partially understands she gives up and lets herself be bubbled.

And Ronaldos Prediction?

On that day Lighthouse sees that Ronaldo has brought in one of his (presumably) imaginary “Sneeple” (You never know). She can see this isn’t right, the new child is not a snake but there’s something about him. Something familiar…

Boom! then they were there

After so long the Crystal gems we’re back in her sphere. Whatever had come before, this was her one chance to warn them, she knew what was coming

she knew Homeworld was coming 

Be it ancient knowledge, some kind of astral sense related to her powers or a form of future vision. Lighthouse knew that the Homeworld Gems meant to retake earth and what it meant. Lighthouse knew she needed to protect earth, or at the very least Ronaldo. But she still couldn’t risk her powers being used safely.

Luckily an opportunity arose. in the moment where Ronaldo’s world view is in flus there was just enough wiggle room in his mind to let her reach out and try and jam a message through. it was a desperate attempt and filtered though her limitations and Ronaldos mind the message was garbled slightly

“Polymorphic sentient Space Rocks!  They’re here to hollow out the Earth! It’s part of the Great Diamond Authority!” 

“The Homeworld Gems! The Kindergarden is still dangerous! the Diamond Authority are coming back to earth!”

She tired to warn them but they didn’t hear…

I hope you’re at peace now Lighthouse Gem……the lost and lonely hero of Beach City….I hope you’re at peace…