someone help me i don't know what i'm doing

anonymous asked:

Hello Red. I don't know if this will get lost in your inbox but you're sort of my role model and I need support from someone... I've just been rejected by a guy I like because I'm not pretty enough. It's not the first time it's happened, and it's starting to fuck me up... I just hate everything about myself, one of my boyfriends made a big deal about my stretch marks (I have a lot...) and that made it worse. I don't know what to do. Please help? Someone?

Look, I hear you. I just don’t understand  the whole “scars are ugly” mentality. It’s absolute bullshit. You’re beautiful, and your stretch marks are beautiful as well. They’re part of you and they’re unique. They symbolize your growth, and growth is good. You’ve gone through life and you’ve survived. Don’t be ashamed of them.

I sure love mine, they look like tiger stripes. Everyone loves tigers, right?. You’ve got to be like one, girl. Beautiful and fierce. And a little bit sexy, if that’s your thing… just don’t let men dictate whether or not you should love yourself. They don’t get to decide that for you. And one day you’ll find a guy who’ll love you for you, as it should be, and who finds you as beautiful as all the stars in the sky.

Love yourself, kitten. Love your stripes. 

-Isabela 

anonymous asked:

Can someone help me understand the Ace Spectrum, please? I'm trying to make sense of... things and I'm so confused I don't know what to do.

Of course!

So, the place where I think most of us get confused on our ace identity journey is with separating out types of attraction, and also separating out attraction from sex drive. So let’s talk about those two things:

There are many kinds of attraction, but we’re going to talk about these: sexual, romantic, aesthetic, and sensual. The idea of the split attraction model is that you don’t have to be attracted to someone in more than one of the ways above at the same time to still experience real and powerful attraction of a specific kind. For most allosexual (non-ace spectrum) folks, they tend to experience all four modes of attraction at the same time, and in particular sexual, aesthetic, and sensual attraction are so deeply tied together that they may not realize they’re actually three separate things. In ace folks, those modes of attraction are often not experienced at the same time, and one of them (sexual attraction) may not ever be experienced at all.

Romantic attraction is, well, someone you’re romantically attracted to. You want to spend your time with them, you think about them when they’re gone, they inspire poetry in you, etc etc.

Sexual attraction is basically when you see a person and think, Wow, I’d hit that. This is the kind of attraction people on the ace spectrum either don’t experience at all or don’t experience as often/broadly as allosexual folks, so we’ll come back to this one in a bit.

Aesthetic attraction is when something hits you just right in the beauty department and you want to look at it for a while. In my own personal experience with both myself and my ace friends, this type of attraction is often (but by all means not always or in everyone) hyper-powered in aces. I’m ace, and lemme tell you, there are people I could stare at forever. But I have never once in my entire life looked at one of those people and thought Wow I’d climb them like a tree. Just never happened, probably never will, because I don’t actually experience sexual attraction.

This particular kind of attraction often trips up people who are struggling to understand asexuality, to which I’d suggest this amazing example I’ve seen floating round the interwebs: You ever go out hiking, and you come to the top of a mountain and you see this breathtaking view of other mountains and valleys stretched out for miles before you, and it’s so incredibly beautiful that you just sit right down and stare at it for a while, and maybe you decide to take an early lunch so you can enjoy the view some more because it’s that lovely. But do you at any point want to bang the mountains? No, you do not. (I mean, if you do, we’re not judging, but let’s assume for most folks the answer is no :-p) And that is the difference between aesthetic and sexual attraction.

Sensual attraction is when you see a person and want to touch or hug or cuddle them in a non-sexual way. Some aces don’t experience this at all. Others experience it quite a lot. Still others experience it somewhere in the middle. For some aces it’s tied exclusively to romantic attraction. For others it’s tied to affection in general (familial, platonic, romantic, etc.). For others, it’s tied to aesthetic attraction. There are all kinds of reasons you might experience sensual attraction, but it’s important to remember that it doesn’t have to be tied to sexual attraction in any way.

So, that’s the split attraction model. To make a personal example, I experience aesthetic attraction roughly every 0.4 seconds, romantic and sensual attraction very rarely (and not always together), and sexual attraction literally never (I’m all the way on the far end of the ace spectrum). And my aesthetic attractions don’t necessarily line up with my romantic or sensual attractions, and vice versa. But aces are many and varied and beautiful, and everyone’s going to experience these attractions differently.

The other thing I wanted to talk about is how sexual attraction =/= sex drive. Folks struggling to identify on the ace spectrum often think they’re not “allowed” to be ace because they masturbate, or they watch porn, or they’re experiencing sexual attraction to their current partner. But here’s the thing: all of those experiences are 100% valid and do not make you any less ace.

First, remember that asexuality, like all sexualities, is a spectrum. So you may be all the way on one end of the spectrum like me (never experiences sexual attraction under any circumstance), or you may be demisexual (only experiences sexual attraction with someone to whom you’ve formed a deep emotional relationship) gray ace (only experiences sexual attraction rarely, for reasons that may or may not involve emotional connection). Both of those orientations are valid asexual identities that involve sexual attraction, and experiencing sexual attraction in those ways does not invalidate your identity on the ace spectrum.

Second, it’s important to remember that sex drive doesn’t actually have to be tied in any way to sexual attraction. Think about the human body like a machine. Just because you’re ace doesn’t mean the pipes don’t still work, you know? You can still experience arousal, you can still enjoy orgasm, you can still enjoy porn, you can even still enjoy sex with other people. None of those things means you experience sexual attraction to the person(s) you’re watching or with. Many aces have extremely active sex drives. Many aces have robust solo sex lives. Many aces read or watch porn to get off (check out autochorissexual; it’s an identity many aces feel at home with, including me). And there are endless valid reasons why an ace person might have sex with someone (you want the emotional intimacy, you’re horny, it makes your partner happy and you don’t mind it at all, you’re wildly in love and want to express it physically, you’re sensually attracted and want the physical closeness, you want to get/get someone pregnant, it just plain feels good, etc. etc. etc.), not one of which need involve sexual attraction to the person you’re sleeping with. Of course, if you’re gray ace or demisexual, you may very well experience a deep sexual attraction to the person you’re with. The point is, aces can and do have sex drives, masturbate, watch porn, and have sex with other people. Although I feel it’s also important to point out here that it’s perfectly okay not to do any of these things; some aces are sex repulsed and/or touch-averse and that is 100% valid too.

Okay so this answer is getting crazy long now, and I feel like I’ve covered the general bases, so I’m going to wrap up. But if you have any other questions, please don’t hesitate to ask! Half the staff here is ace and we’re always happy to talk about it, either in broad strokes or via our own personal experiences.

only the best man
  • john: sherlock? i need help.
  • sherlock: with what?
  • john: i have no idea how to dance, do you know anyone who could teach me?
  • sherlock:
  • john: um sherlock? you ok?
  • sherlock: um yeah, i know someone
  • john: who?
  • sherlock: me.
  • john:
  • john: oh.
  • john: you can dance?
  • sherlock: yes i can.
  • john: really?
  • sherlock: yes i'm actually pretty good.
  • john: well that's good then. *avoids eye contact*
  • sherlock: should we start now?
  • john: o-o
  • sherlock: we don't have to but if you're as bad as you say you are, we probably should.
  • john: um well, ok
  • sherlock: ok. so take this hand *picks up johns hand* and put it here. *puts johns hand on his side*
  • john: uhhh ok
  • sherlock: *puts his hand on johns shoulder* ok now take my other hand with your other hand.
  • john: *hesitantly takes sherlock's hand*
  • sherlock: john, you have to hold on to my hand and my side, not just stiffly put your hand on them.
  • john: *wraps his hand around sherlock's a little more and relaxes the hand on sherlock's waist*
  • sherlock: *staring down at john who is still avoiding any eye contact* good. now move closer to me?
  • john: what?
  • sherlock: you're too far away. you have to learn how to avoid stepping on my- i mean mary's feet. there won't be a lot of space between you and her.
  • john: *moves like 5cm closer to sherlock*
  • sherlock: *sighs in frustration and pulls john from his shoulder until he and john's chests were touching* here.
  • john: i don't think mary likes me enough to stand this close to me *nervous and awkward laugh*
  • sherlock: hmm. *turns on the recording of him playing the waltz*
  • john: *just now noticing how dim the lights are, how alone they are, and how sad and defeated the song sounds.*
  • sherlock: ok so first, step this way, and then that way, and then back again. got it?
  • john: *nods, still looking at the floor*
  • sherlock: good. let's try it to the rhythm of the song. it's a waltz so it's 1-2-3, not 1-2-3-4.
  • john: *confused* ok...
  • sherlock: ok, and 1-2-3, 1-2-3, 1-2-3, 1-2-3. ok you're doing alright.
  • john: um, right, ok, thanks.
  • john: *starting to go to the door* i... um have to... umm go meet.. someone... *walks quickly out the door*
  • -three years later-
  • john: sherlock, i'm not sure i remember how to dance
  • sherlock: oh ok. i'll teach you again. *walks over to john and takes his waist and shoulder after turning on the music*
  • sherlock: now that i think about it, its only been three years since i was teaching you how to dance for your first wedding. that's kind of a short time.
  • john: yeah well i fell in love again.
  • sherlock: *smiling* i'm just glad that this time i'm not only the best man.
On 13 reasons why

13 reasons why is a show I don’t really wanna share gifs or funny pictures of. It’s not a show you take lightly and enter the fandom fangirling over any character. (I’m not saying there are no good ones or ones worth being fangirled over. (I mean there is Jeff Atkins))
All I’m trying to say is that 13 reasons why is a show I need to talk about. I want discussions I want theories I want someone to talk with me about what this show is and what it does to teenagers, to me.
Does it help? Does it trigger you? Do you think the book/the topic was treated well?
Tell me your opinion. In my eyes that is the intention of the book, of the show. To get people thinking, talking, changing.

I destroying myself to fix the ones I love. Until I'm completely gone and there is nothing left of me for them to love. Then they leave...
Introverts At Parties (Social Anxiey)
  • Friend Billy: Hey, wanna come to a friend’s party? It’s gonna be really cooool!
  • Introvert (in head) : I’d rather be at home just eating a bag of chips and watching netflix but since you’re my friend and I don't want you to think I am an anti-social weirdo I'll act like I want to go....
  • Introvert: yeah sure :)
  • *goes to party*
  • Introvert, in head: nonononono.. why did i come to this? I don't know anyone here. *anxiety* ok, ok. just calm down. Let's just find a space were no one will talk to me and just chill there. Ok? OK.... THERE'S SOMEONE COMING. OH NOOO. WHAT DO I DO? HE LOOKES INTIMIDATING, I DON'T KNOW HIMMMMMMMM HE--
  • Extrovert: Hey, so are you new here? I haven't seen you before...
  • Introvert: Yeah. Billy's my friend, he invited me here.
  • Extrovert: Oh cool, Billy is so nice. Well, nice talking to you, cya :)
  • Introvert: bye...
  • Introvert in head: Ok that wasn't that bad. I'm overreacting, parties are cool, I really just need to calm dow- THERE'S SOMEONE COMING HELP!!!!!1!
  • *cycle repeats infinitely*

anonymous asked:

I've been struggling a lot recently due to people's ignorance when it comes to politics, social justice, and just everything in general and it pisses me off so much and just makes me hate the world so much, I really don't know how I'm supposed to be reacting because it's really pissing me off and I hate bigots soooooooo much. I don't know what to do please help

My friend, the only advice I can give you is to make peace with it. There will always be ignorant people out there, everyone has their own personal beliefs and you can’t tell people they are wrong. What is true for you may not be true for someone else. And from a bigger picture perspective, not everyone is here to awaken, so to speak. Our Souls chose to come to this physical reality for a reason, and that reason is duality. Now what does duality mean to you? To me it means there is light & dark, yin & yang, love & hatred, fear & acceptance, beauty and ugliness, life and death. You see, good and bad are human constructs. In Nature there is only balance, which in of itself is another form of yin and yang. When our Souls chose to incarnate here, it does so with the knowledge and desire of karmic lessons. Knowing that for the Soul to grow and become one with source again, it needs to experience this world, in all it’s beauty, and all it’s ugliness. For it’s not the painful experience’s or hardships one might face, it’s how you react to them that matters most. 
Now in your case lets say, you see all these ignorant people everywhere. Bigots that are overcome with fear and ruled by ego. Creating pain and ugliness in the world. It’s easy to become overcome with hate for them, but wait, isn’t that what they are doing? You have a choice, you can chose be the Yin to their Yang, you can chose love. You can chose to be understanding, you can chose to have compassion for them as well, it doesn’t matter that you may think they are not deserving. What matters is that you make the choice of love over hate. You can elevate your own vibration, the vibration of the world, and the vibration of those you speak of, as they are some of the most in need of love in our world.
These are just my thoughts, take them or leave them, but I hope something I said will give you a little peace. 

anonymous asked:

I've read a lot on how to survive the break up of a dom/sub dynamic, but I'm wondering if anyone has any experience with a death, particularly the death of a Dom? I mean, it just feels like I'm mourning differently than if we were a vanilla couple. I can't bring myself to take off my formal collar. I don't know what to do. I was just wondering if you or someone else could possibly point me in the direction of some help within the bdsm community.

I’ve gained a rather curious relationship with death in recent years. My father, grandfather, other family members and friends…. but none of that compares to the loss we suffer when it is one of our own within our lifestyle.

Something that I have only alluded to in very light form in the past is the suicide of my first little. Unfortunately for me it was something that occurred while I was on the phone with her hundreds of miles away and there was nothing that I could really do. She had made that decision regardless of how I felt or what I thought and hearing everything come to an end and then the eerie silence afterwards was a definite life-changing event.

I feel for you in every way because I know exactly what you’re going through. The sudden sense of loss is compounded by the fact that you no longer feel valid due to the structure in your life instantly being missing

You existed to serve him and daily looked forward to fulfilling his tasks, whims, pleasures, and so on.

Now suddenly… You were left with nothing.

Nothing but the opportunity to celebrate all of the great memories that you shared together. Mourning is completely fine and valid, but the celebration of his life should overtake the mourning of his absence in due time.

I’m sure that while he was alive he did what he could to strengthen you and make you better, at least that’s what he should’ve done. And it should’ve made you a little more prepared for this day than you were before.

If you were like me, He would be proud of you to see the strength that you can display in such times as these, and he would be proud to know that everything he poured into you know comes to the surface in that form.

So be strong, and as strange as it sounds… Be joyous. Celebrate the good, apply the good to the future of your life, and in time allow yourself to let everything else go.

I’m sure that he would rather see you happy than to be upset. And he would probably feel bad that the source of your sadness was him.

Make him proud. Be strong. And show others everything that he did in his efforts to work in you.

anonymous asked:

I just stumbled upon your blog and I wanted to share my boy problem. I'm not sure if I'm in love with him but, what I know is that I care for him deeply. I've known him for a short time (5 months) and in that short period of time, he healed and broke me. I don't know if that's possible. He hasn't spoken to me since the beginning of April, and I know it's not that long but, I miss him. And I don't know if he's okay and I'm really worried. he won't answer my texts. My heart hurts. Help?

I do think it’s possible for someone to heal and break you. I don’t know what happened exactly but maybe be the bigger person and just go up to him and talk to him. Even if he doesn’t want to hear it, make him. If you value your friendship above everything else try to at least salvage that. After all having his friendship is always better than having nothing and him not talking to you and not answering your texts.

anonymous asked:

STOP ACTING LIKE A BITCH. PEOPLE HAVE IT HARD TOO, IT'S NOT UNHEARD OF. SO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, ENOUGH WITH THE WHINY "OH, MY LIFE SUCKS, I'M SO SAD AND HATE MYSELF". NOBODY WANTS TO SEE IT. IF YOU WANT SOMEONE TO HELP YOU, GO TO A FUCKING PSYCHOLOGIST. AND DON'T TELL ME THAT YOU SOMEHOW CAN'T DO THAT, BECAUSE WE ALL KNOW THAT YOU'RE AN INDEPENDENT HUMAN BEING WHO CAN CREATE A WEBSERIES IN HS SPARE TIME. IF YOU CAN DO THAT, YOU CAN GET HELP. OKAY?

I mean, I’m not trying to be mean here anon, but I think you may need to take a step back, reread what you’ve written and realize that you may actually be talking to yourself here with this self-projected rhetoric aimed at me? Release that caps lock key and make some nice tea, ok? Woosah.

Could you please be praying for me this evening? I had a major PTSD trigger at work last night and it ended in a very emotional late night. I woke up feeling numb today. I’m supposed to be talking with a lady this evening at work who could potentially train a service dog for me, or put me in contact with someone who could. I’ve been feeling extremely discouraged about this entire situation because almost every single place I come across has denied me because my illness/disability is not physical, or a result of being a veteran. I’m nervous, restless, and extremely anxious. Thank you!

So explain to me why my crush keeps saying things like “when we get married” and “when we live together” but we’re still not actually dating yet lmao

Writing Tips - General - Pt.1

Disclaimer: I’m just a fandom writer and I write for fun and I realized that whenever I sit down and write I seem to learn something. That’s why I’m doing this series: I just want to collect what I learned so far so that it might help others. I never took writing courses so these tips won’t be very technical at all but just the result of my own experience so far.

Some (most) of these tips will only apply to fandom writers.


My biggest tip is:

Read

Read                      r

READ                                       e

read                                                                    a

READ                                                                                      
 d

r e a d 

r
e
a
d


READ

Obviously read books and read fics, because fics are a very specific kind of subgenre of literature that has its own rules. True, some fics could be read as novels or as short stories, but most of them rely on very specific tropes that are much easier (generally speaking) to explore if you’re just starting out.

For example, I was always an avid reader, but before I started being active in the world of fandom and actually started reading fanfiction, I had no idea about the different kinds of AUs and tropes.

Knowing and reading what’s already out there can be scary at first. You’ll read a perfect coffee shop AU that you wished you’d written yourself and you’ll wonder, “But why should I put myself out there? Why should I write something when other people are already doing it and doing it better than me?”

The thing to remember is that readers will always want to read something, no matter how many times they’ve read the same trope applied to the same fictional couple, so one coffee shop AU isn’t enough. Good thing you’re just now planning to write one, right?

And the thing is, you won’t actually know if your writing is good or not unless you try. Even if your first fic isn’t that good, writing is something that you get better at with time and with practice, so there really isn’t any reason not to write (unless you have no interest in trying it).

Let’s say you’re now convinced that you want to try writing something: you might still be wondering how you’re going to get ideas for a fic or a story.

I think we’ve all been there. So…


HOW DO I GET IDEAS?

If you’re someone who doesn’t have a lot of imagination (like me), the thought of writing something is really scary. Of course, you can’t write a story without ideas, so I want to go over a few ways to actually start getting them.

Interact with the fandom

You don’t have to participate actively and you can just reblog stuff, but in my experience, the more you interact (even just by commenting on someone else’s post or tweet), the more your brain starts working on ideas that are yours.

I basically see it as an exercise or workout: the more you do squats the more your muscles build themselves, right? The same way, the more you get your brain to think of even just small headcanons (like, what does a character like to eat? Are they a morning person or a night owl?), the more you’ll get used to thinking up new ideas that could potentially become a full story.

Oh, and when I say interact, I really do mean interact. I was really surprised when I first came to tumblr and found out that it’s perfectly normal for people to randomly start talking to you in your DMs, and the conversation usually starts with some headcanon or just general screaming about your favorite characters or something that just happened recently in the fandom. Sometimes that wraps up in a couple of lines, but others it can lead to wonderful virtual friendships. While that’s amazing on its own, it’s actually also a great support system for any content creators (especially writers), because so many ideas are born out of simple conversations.

Know your sources

The better you know your fandom, the more ideas you’ll get. You’ll start seeing details of a character’s personality that you didn’t see or read the first time, you’ll re-analyze a certain interaction, etc. It’s very difficult to write fanfiction if you’ve only watched/read canon once. 

Sometimes canon is not enough: find metas about characters and scenes and interactions. Metas aren’t canon, but they help a lot and you’ll not only understand things better, you’ll also get new ideas for content you want to write.

Know other sources

You and your ideas don’t and shouldn’t exist in a vacuum. A lot of great ideas come from knowing other works so you can make AUs and retellings.

Also try to remember the difference between the two and ask yourself which one fits better:

  • [fictional source] AU: the story should be more or less the same as your source and set in the same world, but the characters will be the ones from the fandom you’re writing for.
  • [fictional source] retelling: your plot is heavily inspired by [fictional source] but you add elements or take away what you don’t need if something from the original source doesn’t fit your characters. It can also be set somewhere different (for example modern retellings of fairy tales). 

Know your tropes

Knowing popular (and less popular) tropes helps you think about what kind of story you want to write. It also helps you categorize the different stories you read and start thinking about them in a more analytical way.

You need to see the mechanisms (enemies to lovers, friends to lovers, etc) behind a story to be able to analyze it and relate it to other stories, and understand which rules you want to follow once you understand what trope you’re using for your story.

Notice that I said which rules you want to follow, because I think it’s perfectly fine (and even admirable) to be more daring and break trope rules or mix them up. No matter what you want to do, you definitely need to know them first, and then you can start writing them and/or changing them and making them your own.


BEFORE WRITING

Okay, you have a few ideas now (you don’t need to have the full plot before you start writing, but at least an outline would be nice - I have another post planned about plot so look out for that). 

There are a few extra steps you might want to take. Most of these you will kind of just feel in your gut without really having to think about it, but in case that doesn’t happen, here’s a noncomprehensive list of a few of them.


Understand what your story needs in terms of POV:

A POV can make or break a story. There are some things that just don’t work well in a certain person, or they’re extremely difficult to pull off.

Learn what your favorite POV is when you read, and that will probably be the POV you’ll write best. 

Regardless of the type of POV, your story might need more than one (if it’s third person limited or first person). It’s difficult to describe how you can understand it, and I think it has a lot to do with plotting and characterization:

Do you want to keep a character’s motives mysterious until the Big Reveal of chapter 16? Then you should stick to only one character POV. Does your fic follow more than one storyline? Then you will almost definitely need more than one POV.


In case it needs more than one POV:

First of all, I can’t stress this enough: make it understandable when the POV switches. Be it with a completely different chapter or a visual separation, make sure your reader understands it.

With that said, you need to know your story and ask yourself, What POV works best for this scene?

A scene can be extremely powerful and memorable from one POV but completely dull and boring from another. It all comes down to the different characters’ personalities and I can’t possibly cover all the different examples and scenarios in this post, but if you’re familiar with your fictional world enough then you should be able to understand it yourself.


Understand what the best tense for your story is:

This is something that for me usually just happens by itself when I start writing the first few paragraphs. I’ve started fics deciding that they needed to be in a past tense, and then no matter how many verbs I wrote down, my mind would always make me write them in present tense unless I forced a past tense in there. But that’s the thing, whatever you write, it should never feel forced. That’s when I realized that present tense was what felt more natural to the story, and it didn’t matter that I don’t even like present tense. The story didn’t want to be written any other way.

Follow your instinct on this.


Understand what the best format is:

Ask yourself: Is it going to be a long fic with 20 chapters or a one shot? Do you only have enough material for a drabble?

Every fic length is valid in my opinion, but you need to be clear about what you want.

If you do decide to make your fic chaptered, try to make each chapter its own little story, with a beginning, a plot/character arc and an end (which can absolutely be a small cliffhanger, but try to not abuse it).


SHOULD I TELL SOMEONE?

So this is a point I wanted to include even though it’s not exactly about writing itself, BUT I think it’s important to talk about.

Should you tell someone, “Hey, I have this awesome fic in mind that I really want to write!”? 

I don’t think the answer to this is universal. I think generally speaking telling someone definitely helps you stick to your goal, especially if people get excited about your WIP. 

It can also backfire though, you can get anxious about other people expecting something from you when you’re at a point where you don’t even know whether you’ll actually write/finish your story or not. 

(A small addition on this: if you’re like me, you’ll never know whether you’re actually going to publish something until you’ve written all of it. You might have written more than half of your fic and then decide that you don’t want to continue it, for whatever reason. If nobody is expecting it anyway, you’ll feel less bad about abandoning your work because you won’t feel like you’re disappointing anyone.)

This is one of those things that require for you to know yourself because only you will know whether people’s expectations can be a motivation or a hindrance for you. 

My suggestion is not to tell anyone right away if you’ve never written anything in your entire life. Posting without anyone (not even my virtual friendships) knowing about it was what made it possible for me to actually write. I only began sharing and interacting with people as a writer here on tumblr after about three fics (two of which were chaptered ones) and getting enough positive feedback, but I still keep my real identity hidden because I don’t want anyone IRL to be able to find my stuff.

If you know you’re going to be very self conscious about your work, I encourage you to start a tumblr alias like I did, because it can be liberating to write what you want to write without being afraid of what people will think of you if they actually find your fics. 

Of course, this is what worked for me and it might not work for everybody, but try to take measures to protect yourself if that’s the only way you you think you can publish your writing without feeling scared.


This post is already too long so Pt.2 is coming soon!

Other writing tips: (coming soon!)

yuri on ice edition | general pt.2 | plot | dialogues | characterization

anonymous asked:

I'm confused about otabek's 19cm where that info came from? Everyone its talking about it but i dont know why 😂😂 Please halp

someone in the yoi fandom searched the average penis size in the countries and found out that the average size in kazakhstan is 19.1 cm! 

READ ME 🏷🎈
  • I've noticed that my followers have grown into a pretty significant amount of people and i sort of just want to say that I KNOW YOU'RE SAD I KNOW YOU'RE IN PAIN BECAUSE YOU'RE HERE ON THIS PAGE SO PLEASE if you have anything you want to just get off of your chest and share although it probably won't fix it and i'm not saying it will YOU CAN MESSAGE ME you can just say you want to express yourself and that you don't realy need advice and I'll read the entirety of what you have to say because everyone wants to tell someone what's going on in their twisted brain and you can tell me and if you want I'll respond and help if thats what you want me to do but if you just want an ear to listen to your story and be there then I'll be just as fine with that too. 🎈

anonymous asked:

I'm writing a story with magic and the like, and the main character is gay, but someone I was having look over it for me said that making him gay pulled them out of the story. They told me the MC 'didn't act gay.' I don't even know what this person meant by that. But now I'm sitting here thinking, is there a way a gay MC is supposed to act? The story isn't about him being gay, it's about him fighting dragons. Am I doing something wrong? I am genuinely confused. Plz help meh.

A person can’t “act gay,” unless this moron is referencing stereotypes, which makes them an even bigger moron. Can someone act straight? No. It’s a sexual orientation, not a personality type. Your reader is either an idiot or a homophobe. Kick them to the curb and keep doing what you’re doing.

Ways to Cheer Yourself Up (When wanting to be alone) - 50 top things to do
  • 1. Go ON Tumblr, believe it or not, we don't care where you're from, what you do, how you're being you, as long as you are being you, you're pretty much welcomed on here. That's why i love it. Unless of course you are homophobic or judgemental or ignorant - then the people will speak for themselves, we look out for each other here.
  • 2. Read Books; escapism is a wonderful thing
  • 3. Listen to music; and no - not the sad, 'ALL BY MYSELF' type music, but the kickass songs like 'I will Survive' or 'Loser Like Me' just celebrate yourself for being awesome, because we know you are; even if others don't; especially then actually.
  • 4. Become your own superhero. Every single one of you have a talent or a dream. Follow up on that talent/dream. YOU ARE WORTH IT, and you can be whoever you want to be.
  • 5. DISNEY MOVIES. Unless you absolutely hate bursting out into song - better cut of highschool musical and glee while were at this, then Disney is the best pick me up ever.
  • 6. Watch your favourite TV shows. Remind yourself why life can be awesome. Watching your fav characters usually means you can relate to them.
  • 7. Go on walks - it's very pretty outside, and sometimes our heads can be overloaded with information or stress, I advise calming music and a nice walk outside in comfortable clothes.
  • 8. Have a diary. A friend of mine recently bought me one, and it's a godsend because all the anger, or emotions I feel, I try to put in the diary rather than putting it out on others. It also calms you down. I feel better when I write.
  • 9. Speaking of writing...if you enjoy it- WRITE. Writing is a wonderful way to escape. You can put all your emotions into your characters and they just come to life. I tend to do that when I'm stressed.
  • 10. If writing is not your thing then bake. I've actually ironically read in a fan fiction where a character would bake when stressed and try out new recipes, this character tried making butterbeer; maybe be adventurous; have a food blog or something to keep you occupied.
  • 11. Be With Your Pets - Pets are loyal creatures, and they love you, even when you're being a pain in the ass, and I hear they're very good listeners.
  • 12. Now I don't know about you, but I LOVE Musicals. If you are a musical fanatic like me and you're feeling a little down, my dears; listen to those awesome voices, because sometimes we just - need - a break (Also, if you haven't watched RENT, watch it - NODAYBUT TODAY...or Starkid...Starkid make the most funniest musical parodies, even if you don't like musicals I suggest it, and if you're not enjoying their YouTube Channel, then I'll eat my own hat).
  • 13. ASK ME ANYTHING. If you really want to talk to somebody but you don't want to talk to people you know and you just want to get things out, my ASK box is always open.
  • 14. Find a hobby. If you don't really want to talk to anybody, that's okay, sometimes we need to just have some 'me time'. In my me times, I usually deactivate from Facebook, and just focus on things that make me happy. Like; Puzzles, Sudoku, Games, writing, cooking, singing, whatever it is...travelling even. Enjoy yourself.
  • 15. Travel. Maybe being stuck in the same place is the problem, maybe you're head wants to be in a place where it can ACTUALLY THINK.
  • 16. Go Hiking. I suppose Hiking is similar to walking but if you're an outdoor person, this is a great way to clear your head and to feel fresh.
  • 17. Hit The Gym. Or even do your own exercises. I like to walk - do crunches, and I love Zumba. I love dancing. If you love being active, this is also another way to clear your mind from negative things.
  • 18. GO SEE A MOVIE!!! When was the last time you had fun? Even if it's just by yourself. You're allowed to treat yourself. Go, enjoy, be surrounded by people, even if they're strangers.
  • 19. If you like coffee, treat yourself for one at a local cafe. Who knows, you might meet your coffee soulmate in a cafe one day.
  • 20. STOP thinking Negative. Have a Pros/Cons List. Try not to outweight the Pros list with the Cons. Please?
  • You are good enough.
  • 21. Write down a bucket List, and start ticking them off. Having goals and dreams is healthy. If you have dreams, then you have a direction of where you're going.
  • 22. Get help. It's okay, if you're head is in a really bad place to reach out to people. It really is okay.
  • 23. Help others. If you're not sure what to do with yourself at all, be useful to other people less fortunate than you. Volunteer! Work with Charity, Feed the homeless, help the guide dogs association.
  • 24. Smile more. It looks good on you, believe me. Spend time with your guilty pleasures, my guilty pleasure is binge watching glee
  • 25. Please DO NOT go to a pub to drink to ease your mind, if you are going to do that, do it with a friend, or somebody close.
  • 26. Eat Chocolate. Okay yes while society says NO DON'T EAT THE FATTY FOOD. Hey; screw them. If you feel better eating a bit of junk go for it. There's nothing wrong with eating a whole pizza or tub of ben and jerry ice cream when feeling upset - just try not to make TOO much of a habit : p
  • 27. REBLOG YOUR FOLLOWERS POSTS, you might be surprised that you aren't the only one feeling the way you're feeling, you might be surprised by how much you're forgetting that hey - it's gonna be alright.
  • 28. Do something nice for your neighbour. Ah who knows, have you ever actually talked to them? Maybe they might be lonely too.
  • 29. Have a GAMES Night. A very good friend of mine loves Games. If You LOVE Games, then hell have a marathon of them. Play the sims, be in control.
  • 30. Speaking of marathons...dun dun dun - MOVIE MARATHON, I Don't Know About You Guys, But Having A Harry Potter Movie Marathon always cheers me Up. WITH FOOD Of course, and good company, but this is about cheering yourself up, so if you don't want company, that's okay.
  • 31. Draw. I love drawing too. I suppose I'm more of the creative person. There are a lot of different types of people out there, maybe you like solving things - do those fancy cube things Idk what they're called. If you are like my brother and you love Maths, then maybe you can tutor someone. On one hand you're helping someone, and doing something you like doing, just like I'm drawing because I like drawing.
  • 32.Be with kids. believe it or not, kids are the most innocent little munchkins, and they honestly don't care what you look like, if you play hide and seek with them they'll be thrilled, so long as you're nice to them, they're generally nice to you... but be warned, they tell it how it is too. I talk a bit different. The most popular thing they've said to me was "Is that why you talk funny, because of the things in your teeth?" (They've also never really seen braces before) I even had one kid determined to get me to sing 'Everything is awesome' I'll never forget that because this kid clearly didn't care how I sounded, and just wanted me to sing with her. I felt great.
  • 33. If you're into Fairy Tales, Please Please Read Chris Colfer's The Land Of Stories series 1-4. It's an amazing series, and you almost forget what world you're in once you start reading. Plus, there's more coming (I'm a little excited)
  • 34. Watch Pixar Movies. You can't go wrong.
  • 35. GO TO HOGWARTS. Harry Potter Fan? Visit - Platform 9 3/4s in London, or go to the Harry Potter World, or if you can't actually visit these sites, go on Pottermore.
  • 36. Read Fan Fiction, you might not be a harry potter fan, but whatever fandom you are in, believe me sometimes Fan Fictfion Cheer me up. I adore Glee *Don't Judge Me* and Dalton is the best thing ever. Or Little Numbers...or Both. They cheer me up big time.
  • 37. Role play. If you like superheroes or characters, go be with the crowd. I believe they have events like Comic Con, and on Facebook they even have Events for such things, go be with strangers! So long as it's safe of course.
  • 38. Write a letter to the person who inspires you most and send it. You might be surprised by an answer.
  • 39. Pick up your instrument. Don't ignore your musical talent if you do have a musical talent. Remember, you're worth it. I don't care what you've done. Pick, It Up.
  • 40. Maybe go visit your family? I know this is about 'quality me time' but if you haven't seen your family in such a long time or are at a distance. Maybe being surrounded by something familiar is what you need.
  • 41. Change Careers. If you're not enjoying what you're doing or studying, change it. I remember in highschool a teacher said you might change your job 10 - 12 times before getting it right. It'okay, you just haven't found where you're meant to be yet.
  • 42. Enter a competition - Who knows what will come from it, take risks.
  • 43. If you're a risk-taker, challenge yourself. IDK how you're going to do that, but google has some pretty good answers. Even ask your tumblr followers, they follow you for a reason after all.
  • 44. Go on a boat. Go Fishing! I don't know, it's not my thing, but if you like fishing, then hell - go out there and fish.
  • 45. Find time for yourself, are you working too much? Maybe you are working too much. You know life doesn't stop for nobody, and if you keep pushing yourself so hard, time will go so fast and you won't realise how much of that time you could have spent on your own self.
  • The world is not going to end if you treat yourself.
  • 46. You ARE Good Enough. Listen to my words. Sometimes encouragement is all we need, when people feel hopeless, or like everything's gone wrong. It's gonna be okay. I promise, just hang in there.
  • 47. Write Down Quotes that Inspire You. I have a wall of these, and of people that inspire me too, and it reminds me of the good things in life when I'm in a crappy mood.
  • 48. Find something to do. If you're not doing anything, go take up a course, research things that interest you, you might be surprised by what comes from it. Join a community that enjoys doing things you do.
  • 49. Go To The Beach - If you live in Australia like me, visiting the beach is actually really calming and me and my best friend always would go on a random drive, and drive up to a beach or a look out, and it was always calming. Enchanting too sometimes. Maybe we forget about the place we live in, and what's exciting about the place. If you're in New York, visit Broadway or The Statue Of Liberty, or if you're in London, go to the London Bridge, or the Eye, visit the Eiffel Tower if you're in Paris...just go Anywhere.
  • 50. Take a random journey. Go on a train to somewhere new, go on a road trip. You never know what's around the corner.