someone come bother us

anonymous asked:

Any advice for someone wanting to avoid cosplay drama but still make friends? The community where I live seems to thrive on causing so much drama. I don't want to seem stand-offish or elitist as I fear I am. But just seeing it unfold again and again makes me just dread being around any of them. But they are huge gossipers I fear being made out as some snobby bitch.

This ones harder than you think. Drama exists in all communities everywhere. I don’t care if you are in a quilting circle, I guarantee you there’s drama there too. 

I can only give you our own personal policy, as we do not approve or partake in drama either. And that’s 100% DO NOT ENGAGE. 

No opinions, no vague posts, no replies, no answering hate mail, no rants on controversial issues, no standing up for one cosplayer over the other. 

It’s a tough policy at times. Especially in hate mail or call out posts, but its the only way for people to give up on wanting you to enage. we’eve learned over the years that ANY response what people want who like drama. Good or bad, curteous, intelligent, nice or trolly, ANY response at all feeds the people looking for drama so you gotta be RADIO silent. 

This counts for public, in person interaction. You gotta be the wall. “Did you hear about so and so doing so and so for that thing? So and so is so mad.” “Oh, haha nope, I dont know anything about that, but hey I love seeing you! What are you working on lately?”

“I can’t believe so and so said that stuff to me, I hate her she yad ayada yada.” “Oh man, I’m sorry to hear that. Hey lets do something to take your mind off of it, have you been to the dealers hall? Or theres some cool panels coming up today.”

100% no engagement. no sides. no conflict. move on, change topic, detour. 

And if the person refuses, and only ever talks about drama? Goodbye. You don’t hang out with that person anymore. We’ve dropped a LOT of potential friends because we realized all they did was shit talk other cosplayers, and thats not why we do this hobby. 

You can’t let someone distract you from why you do this crazy thing. For fun.