I asked a girl out on a date this Thursday, we’re going to do some gay hipster shit like go record shopping and eat at the multicultural plaza that has these middle eastern style restaurants. If she doesn’t stand me up, which she probably will (that’s what usually happens anyway), it looks like I have something to look forward to
Ok i am totally freaking out with that update!! But you know what keeps me on the edge of a breakdown?? Is that Jack's flannel on Bitty's closet door? Ooohhhh my goooood.
IT IS IT TOTALLY IS!!!!!
unless…. it’s not.
WAIT not in a sad way but we’ve seen Shitty wear the flannel, jack wear it, and now obviously Bitty has it- what if the flannel is literally a HAUS flannel??
Like, it started as Jack’s (obviously) but then Shitty kept stealing it, to the point where Jack once washed it and then put it in Shitty’s closet (because Jack doesn’t pay any attention to which clothes are his and he had just seen Shitty wearing this the other day so it’s his??) and Shitty comes back to him and is like “Bro, it’s no fun if I’m not stealing it!” and this is sophomore year so Ransom and Holster, these obnoxious little frogs that seem to have practically moved into the haus already, overhear and suddenly it is a thing
A “steal the flannel” thing. Shitty goes to steal it from Jack one morning, only to find that it’s missing and then Ransom is casually wearing it at breakfast and “that’s MINE” shitty exclaims. “i thought it was mine” jack mutters but Ransom is smirking and the next day HOLSTER is wearing the flannel which is RIDICULOUS because YOURE GONNA STRETCH IT OUT, MAN. YOU ARE A FUCKING GIANT.
To save the flannel, Shitty forces Jack into a plan with him where Shitty pretends to be a ghost while Jack gets away with the flannel and Shitty thought Jack was going to give it to Shitty because captain jack usually stays above these things but Jack puts it on immediately, smirking and telling Shitty to trust no one, and Shitty realizes dear god they have awakened the competitive side of Jack Zimmermann and–
By the time Bitty gets to Samwell, the switch from person to person has slowed but that’s only because people have gotten better at hiding it. (maybe Bitty doesn’t notice it because he doesn’t live in the Haus and it’s very hard for him to imagine grumpy Jack Zimmermann doing anything fun) If they know you are washing it, people will sneak into the dryer to steal it (end result: this flannel does not get washed as much as it should tbh) and you have to be careful with hanging it in the bathroom while your taking a shower because it will be gone by the time you get out and it is not exactly uncommon to find someone digging through your closet.
Basically, whoever is in possession of The Flannel is The Winner for that day. You get nods (and curses and man I gave it to Wendy Braxton to hold! How did you break her??) and respect and for a while, the wearer of the flannel gets to jump to the front of the breakfast line.
Near the end of his Freshman year, Bitty joins the game entirely by accident. The Haus heat is wonkey again and he’s freezing and considering leaving because maybe pies aren’t worth this, but Shitty says “go grab something of mine, sweet southern baker.” and Bitty goes to the closet to see the Flannel hanging near the front (Shitty had been going for a “hiding in plain sight” strategy that had worked only because most of his clothes are on the ground of his room so “neatly hung up” is not ever what people assume. jack had searched for the flannel just last night for ten minutes while Shitty was in the shower and hadn’t even thought to check the closet.)
His arrival is a little bit like a bomb going off.
“Oh, BITS, I SEE HOW IT IS” Shitty cries. “BETRAYAL!” “Dude, just walking down with it. Bold, Bitty, bold.” “I guess it did get a little stretched out, eh?” (that’s jack and bitty is pretty sure that’s a short joke. he is unimpressed.) and “I WENT THROUGH HOLSTERS HOCKEY BAG CUZ I THOUGHT HE HAD IT” ransom is screaming and it takes a while but eventually the game comes out. (Random and Holster do a Hockey Things presentation. Jack still isn’t sure where the PowerPoint came from.)
And it continues. Chowder is by far the worst at keeping the flannel but he is freakishly good at finding it. He keeps trying to give it to Farmer to hold and she helps him the first few times but then she gets annoyed by the hockey players breaking into her room sometimes in the middle of the night so she starts giving it to Bitty in exchange for pie. Everyone tries to keep it away from Nursey because they are afraid he’s going to put patches on it or some hipster shit and Dex claims to be above this whole “weird thing” but when he does stumble on the flannel, he wears it with pride. Meanwhile, Ransom and Holster are still way too into this. Except for maybe Shitty. Oh and Jack. Jack is the best liar and- let’s be honest. they are all way to into this.
Anyway, all this to say, that that flannel? Sure, maybe it was a bit romantic that Jack gave it to Bitty (after risking life and limb to steal it from Lardo), but it’s hanging on the back of the door now only because Bitty is planning on putting it on and starting Junior Year right.
After throwing her phone in her bag and changing quickly, Lupe didn’t waste much time in driving over to pick up EZ. She had been glad to hear that Al had invited him on tour, knowing it’d give him some inspiration and Alejandro would have another person around to watch his back. She pulled in front of the house and honked the horn if only to fuck with him and texted him to come outside. “I would come in but I’m lazy and your door seems really far,” she yelled out the window, smiling as he came closer. “Hey loser. Get in, we’re going to do some hipster shit.”
Numerous tears slid down her window pane and Victoria watched them crisscross with half-open eyes. She felt so lethargic all of the sudden. She had previously been uploading her numerous outdoor shots she took yesterday (when it had actually been a perfectly sunny day this April) to her Facebook photo album but decided to take a break when the pounding of heavy rain started up above her head and against her dorm window. Pushing her laptop to the side, Victoria laid her head down on crossed arms and turned her thoughts over to her project partner.
WORD UP ENTPs and OTHER PEOPLE WHO DON’t Take themselves srsly
Okay, hear me out again.
Reddit is full of xNTJs and neckbeard INTPs who are annoying af and self righteous about how smart they are
4chan is exclusively lonely INTPs with some INFPs
Facebook is largely SJs and SPs and assholes
Wordpress is for Super Serious INxJs and assholes
Tumblr is largely xNFPs who are self righteous about their morals (and it has annoying af ads now)
Imgur is NTs of all variety, but usually it is INTx wit that makes top posts, and we can’t really seem to interact with each other
Imgur and Tumblr suffer LARGELY from the hive mind effect.
We find some hipster as shit, unknown, blogging platform that allows us to be wild and free and dominate it as the Land of the ENTPs where we can shitpost and troll or be as serious and deep as we want. We can produce cool content.
It would be like combining The Oatmeal and Hyperbole and a Half.
coffee shop!au based on this awesome fan art for my wonderful and beautiful friends on twitter Helena + Marie
‘I can’t believe you’re making me sit in here. I feel like an Instagraph hipster or some shit.’ Dean complained.
Sam rolled his eyes and gave his brother one of his customary bitch-faces. ‘It’s Instagram, Dean, and what’s wrong with getting our coffee from here for once?’
Dean looked at the room around him. Over-stuffed couches and too-small tables with tiny chairs cluttered the small space. ‘It’s all so pretentious. Why are there so many different types of coffee, huh? What’s wrong with a regular old cup of joe?’
Sam just scoffed and didn’t bother replying. Instead, he just looked at the tiny menu of pastries the coffee shop had on offer.
After a few moments of reading through the list of desserts, Sam laughed lightly to himself. Dean looked up from where he’d been scrolling mindlessly through his phone and gave his brother a questioning look.
When he noticed Dean watching him, Sam spoke up. He pushed the piece of paper towards his brother. ‘Hey, so get this. If you order a slice of their ‘festive apple pie’ you get a free latte with an ‘equally as festive’ design drawn on with cream.’
Dean rolled his eyes. ‘They call it ‘festive’ but it’ll just be a normal pie with crap loads more cinnamon in it.’
‘So you don’t want it then?’
‘I didn’t say that.’ Dean muttered.
Sam smirked. ‘I knew it.’
‘Don’t judge me.’ Dean said as he moved to stand from his seat. Sam lifted his hands in mock surrender but the smirk remained on his face.
Dean shook his head and walked over to join the line to the counter to order his pie.
The queue moved along quickly and soon Dean was at the counter. He looked up from where he had once again been scrolling down his phone and almost dropped it. The barista was - for lack of a better word - beautiful.
His hair was slightly ruffled like he’d been running his fingers through it repeatedly. Dean couldn’t blame the dude, he’d start pulling his hair out if he had to work in a place like this. The guy’s jaw clenched slightly before it it opened to speak.
‘Excuse me, sir? Can I help you?’ He asked.
Dean glanced around him and realised he’d been holding the line up, staring at this guy. ‘Uh, yeah. Can I get the, uh, ‘festive apple pie’?’
The barista - Castiel, according to the name badge that Dean could now see on the guy’s apron - smiled and pressed some buttons on the cash register next to him. ‘And would you like the free festive latte with that?’
Dean would take anything the dude would give him at this point if he was being honest. ‘Yeah sure, dude, why not?’
Castiel smiled again and gave Dean the total to pay. As he accepted the money from Dean, Castiel told him: ‘I’ll get that ready in a couple of minutes and get someone to bring it over to your table, okay?’
Dean nodded and walked back to his table, but not before stumbling over one of the many wooden chairs scattered around the room. He looked back to see if Castiel had seen his accident and saw the barista chuckling at the coffee maker. ‘Stupid hipster chairs.’ Dean muttered to himself.
Sam was waiting at the table with a knowing smile on his face. His eyes followed Dean until he took his seat opposite Sam again.
‘You know, Sammy, the wind will change and your face will stay like that.’ Dean said,trying to cover the slight nervousness he felt at being subjected to Sam’s gaze.
Sam’s look morphed into a bitch-face again. ‘Ha ha, Dean. Very funny.’
Dean smiled at his brother sarcastically. ‘Seriously though dude, why were you looking at me like that?’
‘I noticed you getting all flustered over that guy who served you.’
‘Ahem, and? What about it?’ Dean scratched nervously at the back of his neck.
‘Nothing. I just haven’t seen you like that before. Normally you’re, well, smoother than whatever that was.’
‘Just drop it, Sam. It’s not like he’d be interested in me anyway.’
Sam sighed and rolled his eyes but he didn’t reply. Dean was grateful.
They sat in a silence that was somewhere between awkward and comfortable, until a barista came to the table with Dean’s order. Dean thanked her as she placed the plate of pie and the coffee cup on the wood surface. She left with a small smile on her face that looked as if she was trying to hold in a laugh. Dean frowned but didn’t think anything of it.
He could immediately smell the cinnamon from the apple pie - he knew it - and he was about to bring a bite of it to his mouth, when Sam choked on his drink. Once he stopped spluttering and cleared up the small puddle of coffee he’d created, he pointed to Dean’s own coffee cup. ‘Um, Dean? Have you seen your coffee?’
Dean frowned again. He hadn’t even looked at the cup, thinking that he’d probably try the strange sounding coffee after he’d eaten his warm pie. He looked down and his eyes went wide.
Drawn in the coffee, instead of the festive design it was meant to be, was a very obvious dick. Dean’s head snapped up to the counter where Castiel was stood taking someone’s order.
The barista must have sensed Dean’s gaze on the side of his face but he looked up seconds later and winked suggestively at Dean. Suddenly, his hair looked less like stressed-out-coffee-shop-worker and more like sex-hair-god.
Dean’s mouth dropped open. He slowly pointed to himself and Castiel nodded his head. Then he held up a hand and mouthed wait a second. He turned back to the customer he had been serving and when they left he looked back to Dean who was still staring at him in shock.
Castiel saw the look on Dean’s face and chuckled to himself, before pointing his finger and gesturing at something next to Dean.
Dean looked around him until, finding nothing, until he spotted the napkin under the coffee cup. He pointed at it and gave Castiel a look as if to say: is this it?
Castiel nodded and Dean took it out from under the cup. Written in blue biro was a short message.
I can’t leave the counter so I couldn’t bring you your order. I hope you like the personalisation I made ;) I finish in an hour would you like to grab something to eat?
P.S I hope the ‘stupid hipster chairs’ didn’t hurt you too much.
Dean looked straight back up at Castiel and nodded hesitantly.
Castiel gave him a beaming smile in return before returning to work.
Dean blushed and looked down at his pie, starting to gather a piece onto his fork once more.
‘You know what this means, Dean?’ Sam asked after he read the message himself.
‘Um, no?’ Dean replied, a bite of pie still in his mouth.
Sam cringed at his brother’s eating habits but shook his head and continued with what he was going to say.
‘You’re going to have to get an Instagram account.’ He laughed.
A/N: I hope you enjoyed this one! I wrote it all in a day which is pretty good for me lmao
O.K. So there's this cool black guy in my class and today he wore a sweater that said "I met god, she's black" honestly what is this about? Like, I'm a christian and I was offended about that shit. Like it's cool that black people want to have pride but not at the expense of my religion.
What is this ask even? And the shirt is said to be some white hipster shit anyway.