some you win

2

He has a 99.99% chance of stealing yo girl

6

14. TO MOUNT LANAYRU

“Be sure to take the time to soothe your mount… that’s the only way it will know how you truly feel.” Your advice was quite helpful- thank you. This little one and I are getting along quite well now. At first, I wasn’t sure if I should outfit him with all of the royal gear. I thought maybe he should have to earn it first. But it works! He wears it like a true natural. I’m trying to be a bit more empathetic. Benefit of the doubt, you know? See that mountain? That’s Mount Lanayru. It takes its name from the Goddess of Wisdom. Lanayru’s decree is very specific. It says: “No one is allowed, under the age of seventeen… for only the wise are permitted a place upon the mountain.” I’ve prayed at the Spring of Courage and at the Spring of Power, yet neither awoke anything inside me. But maybe up there… perhaps the Spring of Wisdom, the final of the three, will be the one. To be honest, I have no real reason to think that will be the case. But there’s always the chance that the next moment will change everything. Tomorrow… is my seventeenth birthday. So then I shall go… and make my way up the mountain.

tfw you love a Thing and your Friends but sometimes the two just don’t mix

This was a sad Eurovision for Spain not because we lost, but because we wanted zero points SO BAD we got frustrated when someone gave us five.

This teacher is history.

Kinda long, but I got rid of a backwards old man from teaching sooo….

So back in high school I was good kid. As and Bs, all AP, top twenty, the whole deal. The point is here that I am good at the school. My grandma was a college History Professor and she raised me to be a lil nerd. I was not used to bad grades, she was not used to me having bad grades as there was some extreme pressure on me to do well.

This is where HE comes in. It was Senior year. I had already rocked through all my APs thus far with 4s and 5s, all I had to do was rock out my last few and I would graduate with 36 hours under my belt and be pushed into my sophomore year of college, heck yeah, less money right? This particular teacher taught AP US history, a subject I was well versed in thanks to the gma, one I should have no problems with. I went through the first test confident in my knowledge and not having read out of the book, my first mistake. Now it wasn’t because I didn’t know my stuff, but I digress. I got that test back with a big shined red F.

Needless to say I was frazzled. I did as any student should do and write better notes, convinced it was my own cockiness that brought my downfall. Still didn’t read the text book because I had better resources at home, so I studied the appropriate material in my grandmas books. Mistake number 2. Second test comes back to me with another shiner. I didn’t understand I knew my material! Rinse and repeat until midterms right before winter vacation. My grandma was livid. Absolutely furious with me for doing so poorly in history of all things, and demanded that I request to bring my tests home to study my mistakes for my midterm. But when I asked my professor said no because he didn’t want tests circulating around. My grandma called about twenty times and finally he relented.

I brought home the tests and she sat down with me, my text book, my stack of Fs and her books to drill the knowledge into me. She looked at the first test, then the second, then the third, so on and so forth with out saying a damn word, with me sitting in my chair convinced she was about to bring forth the righteous fury. She did, but not on me. “I don’t understand, these questions are wrong? Your answers are all correct to them.” I shrugged, just as confused as she was. She cracked open my text book to see if there was any correlation and bam. There sure as hell was.

Not only was some of the info plain wrong, but it dated back to before the fricking civil rights movement. That’s right kiddos, it didn’t even mention the 14th amendment, or anything remotely “current”. Oooo boy was she PISSED. She revoked everything she had taken from me as punishment, and stacked the tests and books together, and silently got up. The very next day my grandma was at the school speaking to the principal, and on conference call with the superintendent.

Let me tell you why this text is especially bad where I’m from. I live in Texas. The school boards and stuff are VERY strict about anything to do with race because they don’t want to be seen as backwards hicks, so all those inflammatory news stories you hear? Yeah they get taken care of real quick once brought to the attention of the right people. Mr. US “History” professor was done with by then end of the year. “Retired” they say. Sure okay.

Unfortunately he stayed on teaching the way he had the rest of the year and I did poorly on the AP because he wouldn’t let me study the right stuff in class. You win some, you sorta only kind win some.

phantom-mizero  asked:

Funny Hat Facts: Hats are going back to 30,000 BC, so they've been there for a really long time. In 1797 a man named John Hetherington was given a £500 fine for inciting riots in the streets, because he was wearing a top hat. It is said that it's great height and shiny silk luster incited terror and panic. Honestly Black Hat would probably, as soon as he heard of this, decide that the top hat will be his main look.

BH was probably like “this is it. the most villainous hat ever. i n e e d it.”

  • He gets into immediate rivalries with anyone who’s hat is tALLER THAN HIS–
  • “Flug do you see that.” “Boss it’s just a guy in a hat, what’s the pr–” “FLUG. YOU SEE THAT RIGHT?? THAT’S UNACCEPTABLE. HOW DARE THAT MAN COPY MY AESTHETIC IMPERSONATE MY IDENTITY! AND HE HAS THE GALL TO MAKE HIS HAT HIGHER THAN MINE???”
  • “uh boss i think he just likes wearing hats?” “Don’t be ridiculous Flug do you see how stupid that looks? What kind of moron wears a hat that tall!?!”
  • (Said hat is like. an inch taller than BH’s. Flug kinda stares at BH’s hat, then at BH, then back again. “really.”)
  • BH probably sells villain fashion tbh; branding and appearance are just as important for a client as the actual weaponry.
  • “NO CAPES. CAPES ARE SOOOO EARLY 2000′S– Have a coat instead. This is much, much edgier more evil.”
Lightsaber Battle - Pietro Maximoff x Reader

Words: 1358
Pairing: Pietro Maximoff x Reader
Featuring: Tony Stark
Warnings: swearing, maybe
Requested by anon
Pietro and the reader having a lightsaber battle in the middle of the toy section
Summary: What happens when you and Pietro are in the toy section and Pietro is pracitcally a toddler in a store? Chaos ensues.
Authors Note: this was so much fun omf

Pietro Maximoff / Full Masterlist

Ao3


“Target could be my second home,” You marveled as you walked into the doors of the large store.

Pietro laughed. “Well, you do come here a lot.”

“Because I love it!” You squealed and walked to where the one-dollar section was.

With a roll of the eyes, he put his hand on your shoulder. “That, and Tony kicks us out of the base a lot.”

Shrugging, you picked up random things in the one-dollar bins. Tony does kick you two out of the base a lot, mainly because when you don’t have anything to do, you annoy someone until you are entertained and come up with something to do. He’s usually the easiest to annoy, not to mention that he gets annoyed really easily, and his reactions are typically the funniest.

You walked up to the nearest employee, doing like you and Pietro always do. “Excuse me, miss, where are the toasters?” You linked onto Pietro’s arm. “My husband is really worried about the fact that we do not have a toaster and I’m afraid he’s going to break down if he doesn’t see a toaster soon,” You told the girl who seemed to be a bit older.

She quickly directed you to where the toasters would be, and once she was out of sight, the two of you broke into a fit of laughter. “That was a good one. I’m really passionate about toasters,” He laughed. It was almost a tradition after the many times you two have been to Target recently, asking the staff random and strange questions. Sometimes he was your son, sometimes you were a random stranger, and today he was your husband. Of course, you two were only friends, which made it only funnier.

Keep reading

So the Woodsman is pretty darn physically strong against the Beast. From the cartoon (I don’t know about any of the supplemental material), it seems like either before or aftet the Beast first tricked the Woodsman into thinking his daughter’s soul was in the lantern, the Woodsman attacked the Beast…and was doing so well that the Beast let him have it. And then, at the end of the show, the clearing in the forest is pretty wrecked by the fight between the Woodsman and the Beast by the time Wirt gets there.

It seems to bother the Beast that his soul is in another’s posession –he keeps asking the Woodsman if he’s tired of carrying it yet (with the added bonus that this threat to his daughter’s supposed soul jar keeps the Woodsman vigilant), and reaches for it when the Woodsman is distracted.

But the Beast also takes advantage of someone else doing the work of keeping his soul alight. It seems to be not worth his effort, at first, to overpower the Woodsman if he can deceive him. The same, perhaps, with Wirt, who has been shown to physically overpower the Woodsman.

The Woodsman wins, but he also loses. He defeats the Beast, but ends up in its thrall. Until someone else, not tied to ‘the lantern must stay lit’ survival mode (yet) can show him the way out.

anonymous asked:

if u could see any victuuri fic idea come to life, what would it be?

I am a sucker for like literally anything where victor is the hopelessly smitten one. That shit where like, victor, ice-cold world-renowned male model, walks into a bakery, sees yuuri and immediately slips and falls over the wet floor sign. 

You could sign me up to pretty much any au with victor being a hopeless dork

too many white ppl not wanting to speak up bc they’re scared of bein ostracized by their white friends…and u know what i’m really sick of? white ppl who never bring up issues on their own. they wait till all the people of color on their twitter feed, on tumblr are discussing something and post a shitty rephrasing of a post a person of color already made and better to seem involved. they try to rehash a point that has been made millions of times to the point where it’s common knowledge and play this off like they’re accomplishing something. you don’t have to teach poc about racism. we fucking know all about it.

y’all are silent 364 days of the year but then when poc are upset about something you decide to chime in with your obligatory white two cents that accomplishes nothing. and you won’t bring this stuff up in front of other white people either. not ever. you’ll listen to the white people around you being openly hateful and you’ll keep your mouth shut. all this talking like you care and then you refuse to confront your racist and hateful white friends because you don’t want them to exclude you or get mad at you. if you care about us why the fuck you want friends like that in the first place? 

we can tell when you’re posting shit just to seem like “one of the good ones” and we can tell when you post stuff bc you’re scared the big bad people of color will come for you if you don’t and you’re just trying to cover your ass