Considering the negative messages I'm getting lately I feel the need to say this.
TW - negative body talk
I started this blog about a year ago thanks to the fat positive and body positive movement here, for once I felt like I had worth. By watching girls my size and larger pose in cute outfits and smile and grab their bellies with no fear I felt that maybe there was more to me than what I deemed at the time ‘disgusting rolls’.
I followed (and still follow) body positive bloggers such as mikalamode, rachelecateyes, sodapopsweetheart, plussizepanda and an old friend of mine who’d I’d not seen in years queensassyofthefatties (all of which I suggest check out by the way). I’d check the fatshion and plus size tags daily for outfit inspiration and new store to look at.
My husband saw the difference after about a month; that I started dressing better, fussing over my hair a bit. Slow I started buying dresses, something I told him I didn’t feel I’d deserved to wear before! I actually bought a mirror, having before hidden from my reflection as if my image was cursed.
Most importantly for the first time since we’d met when he’d tell me I was beautiful I believed him. I didn’t merely shove the compliment aside with an uneasy laugh and the comment of, “You’re sweet.”
I felt that by sharing outfits that maybe me feel comfortable and happy that maybe that feeling of positivity would carry on the another person who needed to learn to love themselves as well.
I generally don’t post much more here than ask responses and ootds, I’m really not the best with words and my social anxiety makes me terrified of offending people on accident. But right now, I can’t find myself caring too awfully much about people who think I should kill myself because I’m 275 lbs.
If you don’t care for a message of indiscriminate love and acceptance for yourself just ignore me. Scroll right on by to something you care about. However don’t come to me telling me to stop doing what I’m doing just because you, for whatever sad reason, tie in body appearance with a persons worth.
I am not going to stop posting my pictures. I am not going to stop spreading a message of self love. I am not going to stop loving myself.