Captain Hero: Hey, kids! Captain Hero here with Getting Laid Tip 213 - The Backrub Buddy! Find a chick who’s just been dumped and comfort her by massaging her shoulders, and soon, (makes a censored hand gesture) she’ll be massaging your prostate. Observe!
(Captain Hero is massaging Wooldor’s shoulders)
Captain Hero: Oh, I’m so sorry Wooldoor, your boyfriend Chip dumped your ass!