socially awkward

The signs as awkward conversation moments:

Aries: forgets how to form sentences

Taurus: stares at the general direction of someone instead of looking them in the eye

Gemini: tries to think of a word and makes awkward hand symbols hoping the other person will know what they mean

Cancer: awkward silence

Leo: aggressively thinks of something to say and blurts it out, even though the conversation already ended

Virgo: everyone is on their phones

Libra: is left out of the conversation and slowly backs away

Scorpio: talks about the weather

Sagittarius: eating while trying to answer a question 

Capricorn: forced smiles

Aquarius: pretends to know what everyone else is taking about

Pisces: locks eye contact for over 5 minutes

The Greatest Feats of the Awkward-Social-Situations Escape Artist

The Escape Artist was locked in a bank vault with a friend he secretly had a crush on. As the two-thousand-pound door was swung into place, he asked if she had ever thought about being more than just friends. She said no. He broke out of the vault in the time it took him to say, “Never mind. I was kidding; forget I said anything jk jk jk.”

Read more daring feats on newyorker.com.

Photograph by Time Life Pictures / Mansell / The Life Picture Collection / Getty