social-rejection

like men who go up to women and say they “know you don’t like me because i’m weird” are, in my experience, always always always weaponizing relatively minor social rejection in order to guilt women into talking to them and hanging out with them. i have never met a man who does this and isn’t transparently taking advantage of women’s social training to accommodate others. you don’t have to be nice to these men, they’re just another version of “nice guys” and you owe them nothing.

I’ve noticed this revisionist Greek myth is common wherein Persephone loves Hades and eats the pomegranate seeds in order to evade her overbearing mother, and that’s all well and good. You know, sometimes I’m in the mood for it and sometimes I’m not. But hear this: as long as we’re doing this, why is no one wondering whether Aphrodite might really love Hephaestus? 

Think about it. All the gods in their immortal splendor are lining up to marry her, doing everything in their power to impress her, the goddess of love and beauty, and she choses…that guy. A god in technical terms only, a social reject who’s ugly and malformed and um, no fun. Always slaving away in his workshop when everyone else is quaffing nectar and having their eternal beach party up on Mount Olympus. They can’t believe she’d give up all of them for that. 

So, because the gods do not take rejection well (looking at you Apollo), eventually they start to say to each other, well, we all know Zeus made her do it anyway. He’s gotta feel guilty for throwing Hephaestus off Mount Olympus that one time. And it quickly becomes that poor girl, stuck in that workshop full of sweat and dirt and cyclopses when she could have had one of us. Because of course they’ve got love all figured out; it’s entirely technical and dependent on who’s the most charming and good-looking and not at all variable and strange and notoriously unpredictable, right?

Meanwhile Ares, only the most arrogant and brainless of the crew, can’t take a hint and is still showing up wherever Aphrodite goes trying to hit on her, so eventually she and Hephaestus decide to rig up an elaborate mechanical trap for him, using her as bait. When all the gods have laughed at him for getting caught he huffily attempts to regain his dignity by telling them, whatever, guys, you want to know the truth, I was meeting her for an assignation. And they all kind of know he’s full of it but they just accept it as the unvarnished truth from thereon in, because they’d love to believe she’d cheat on Hephaestus with Ares. They’d love it. Come on, Aphrodite, get off your high horse and admit you’re just as shallow as the rest of us. 

So they talk, but Aphrodite doesn’t really care about their collective jealousy because she dotes on her misshapen genius of a husband with his sooty hands and his sweaty brow who always takes her seriously and is always so hard at work inventing astonishing new things to make her happy, and she loves the volcano they live in with its internal pressures so conducive to the formation of precious stones and its passages lit with glowing lava that so gorgeously offsets her cheekbones, and all the cyclopses worship her because even with one eye apiece they’ve still got more depth perception than most men do where she’s concerned. True it is that as a couple the two develop a reputation for not getting out much, because all those Olympian parties bore them to death and they’d rather spend time with each other (poor Aphrodite, she’s such a vivacious young thing and her husband is so grasping and insecure that he won’t let her go out and have fun), but they do all right. 

12th house and past lives

If you have no planets in the 12th house and are unsure of the house cusp, calculate the sign before your own ascending sign. For example, if you have Leo rising you have Cancer on the 12th house cusp. If you have Capricorn rising, you have Sagittarius on the 12th house cusp 

Sun in the 12th house/Leo on the 12th house cusp: The remnants of social importance from previous lifetimes activate through the spirit, there is a constant pressure to feel understood and gain acceptance, there is a spiritual purpose that in this lifetime is not recognised as they once were. In the past life the individual could have been a social representative, sovereignty, leader, artist, or public figure

Moon in the 12th house/Cancer on the 12th house cusp: The family dynamics and karma from ancestors is passed through to the individual such as past traumas, addictions, spiritual abuse. The individual made a lot of sacrifices, and the natural maternity can be astounding, they give form to the term ‘natural mother’, or 'natural father’. The individual may have been a devoted parent, crone, witch, nurse, or work with women in the community 


Mercury in the 12th house/Gemini or Virgo on the 12th house cusp: Thoughts from previous lifetimes make entrance so the individual can feel as though their mindset is trapped in another time. They can experience strange visuals or flashes with no origin. The individual may be a brilliant automatic writer or channeller because the memories of past life studies are so fresh. In past lives Gemini 12th house may have been a teacher, academic, messenger, writer. Virgo 12th house may have been a calligrapher, healer, pharmacist, nurse, witch. Virgo 12th house may carry on sicknesses from past lives that must be dealt with consciously 


Venus in the 12th house/Taurus or Libra on the 12th house cusp: The individual was a figure of beauty in previous lifetimes, likely revered for their artistry, femininity, and vision. There may have been abundant finances that are not so available in this lifetime, so the individual is used to a lavish life and may accumulate as though this is still so. Libra in the 12th inherits relationship dynamics and trauma from previous lifetimes, there is lingering heartbreak that needs to be healed


Mars in the 12th house/Aries on the 12th house cusp: The individual was forced to constantly fight for their life previously, so the survival dynamics can still subtly activate themselves, there can be unfounded fears about the world and inherited reactivity to danger. The spirit is used to danger, and it needs to be soothed in this lifetime. There may be troubles with men due to abuses in the past life 


Jupiter in the 12th house/Sagittarius on the 12th house cusp: The individual can access tremendous knowledge and wisdom through the portal of the higher mind because this was studied intently previously. The individual was likely a scholar, philosopher, or spiritualist. Because of the divine intimacy that was attained, the individual has inherited an intrinsic belief in the good powers of God and feels secretly protected. The abstract mind had been previously cultivated 


Saturn in the 12th house/Capricorn on the 12th house cusp: The guilt of the unfinished work in previous lifetimes is haunting, the individual feels they have inherited an intense responsibility that they are not ready for. Karmic family dynamics have been inherited that relate to the father, this relationship can be highly pressured or non existent 


Uranus in the 12th house/Aquarius on the 12th house cusp: Intuition and the ability to respond to this has been primed and cultivated in previous lifetimes meaning the individual is open to the flow of profound and developed intuitive wisdom that seems to come from nothing. There is natural spiritual knowledge that has not been consciously learned. In previous lifetimes the individual may have been a social outcast or reject, they may have been prosecuted for their progressive vision or knowledge. They may have been an astronomer, astrologer, occultist, scientist, academic, revolutionary 


Neptune in the 12th house/Pisces on the 12th house cusp: Dreams, visions, addictions, and sicknesses from past lives live through the individual they may be at hostage to previously cultivated psychic activity and psychological escapism. There is generous karma to relinquish, the individual may have been a mystic or mentally unwell. They have naturally adapted to the dreamlike state of reality 


Pluto in the 12th house/Scorpio on the 12th house cusp: This is a lifetime of constant, painful, and severe transformation in order to completely abolish and perish the demons that have been accumulated in previous lifetimes. The individual was a force of goodness and powerful societal change, in this lifetime they are offered the rectitude of focusing on themselves and reconciling the light and shadow

-C.



Can I just say I have a lot of opinions about JJ, especially from a Westerner’s point of view? Specifically, the way he’s treated by the other skaters in YOI? JJ is loud, boisterous, and toots his own horn at every chance. Does this make him a bad guy? No way. In fact, all it does is paint a picture of how the rest of the world views people from America. Now, I’m from the US, so I can’t really speak for Canada, but I have quite a few Canadian friends and we are all, by definition, “North Americans”. I notice that our cultures aren’t really that different- specifically our social culture. Most Western young men act A LOT like JJ does- making jokes at other peoples’ expenses, trying to one-up everyone around them, be it verbally or otherwise, being really competitive and thriving in a competitive atmosphere, and generally just being very loud and obnoxious. 

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Barriers to Success

1. Seeing success as being determined by external factors. (So if I fail it’s circumstances or someone else’s fault.) This takes away my sense of power and keeps me stuck in failure and helplessness.

2. Personal blind spots. Sometimes we keep failing but we’re blind to the fact that there’s something we’re doing that is causing us to fail. That could be related to our communication style, our attitudes, lack of knowledge and ability, pursuing something that doesn’t suit our gifts and talents, and so on.

3. Self sabotage. Sometimes we don’t feel we deserve to succeed so unconsciously we do something that causes us to fail. This includes meditating on self-limiting thoughts (Eg, “I could never …; I don’t deserve …”).

4. Feeling ambivalent about the goals you’ve set. We often set a goal that is someone else’s goal so we’re not really sure if it’s what we want ourselves. That affects our motivation, and our will to succeed.

5. Fear of change. All successes bring some change – and that can feel quite threatening. And we’re often comfortable with our life as it is now – and so we wonder if success will really make us happier.

6. Pressure from others who don’t want you to succeed. It’s very common for our peers to be threatened by success, and we know they’ll be sarcastic or mean if we succeed. Hence, we don’t try our hardest as we recognise the cost will be social isolation, or rejection by our friends.

leo valdez:

  • admits to being better with machinery than people
  • his jokester persona is learned behaviour to protect him from social rejection, but he’s often lost in situations where he can’t apply it
  • seems to find it difficult to judge when his actions are inappropriate 
  • hyper-fixates on new ideas and projects
  • forgets about personal hygeine / self care (not noticing when he’s burned his clothes off, having grease stains and soot on himself)
  • extremely focused on engineering / inventing to the exclusion of other interests
  • taps morse code as a stim

im not saying leo’s autistic except he’s so autistic that i’d be surprised if no one else has pointed it out yet. autistic leo valdez. fight me

phineas and ferb episode

OPEN TO: THE BACKYARD

PHINEAS: ferb, what do you want to do today?
FERB: [blinks]
PHINEAS: hmm… you’re right ferb. since there’s no true ‘self’, whatever ‘we’ want to do today is just playing into the social dogma of what can or can’t be done. 
FERB: [thumbs up]

ENTER: ISABELLA

ISABELLA: whatcha doin?
PHINEAS: rejecting the social dogma!
ISABELLA: cool. can i help?
PHINEAS: sure. but i think asking kinda defeats the purpose. i think you just do it.
FERB: [nods]

ISABELLA opens her mouth to speak but is interrupted as BUFORD and BALJEET enter the scene

BALJEET: whatcha doin?
ISABELLA: hey!
BALJEET: oh, sorry isabella. i did not see you there. 
BALJEET: so. what are you guys doing?
PHINEAS: we don’t know yet. we’re trying to get a little bit nebulous with it today
BUFORD: explain.
PHINEAS: well, is anything we do really our own decision? what’s autonomy like in modern society? we’re trying to get out of that bind. 
BUFORD: sounds to me like you’re just playin into the whole thing, dinnerbell.
BUFORD: you really want to break down social constructs? try something like this.

BUFORD pulls back his arm and delivers a strong punch to the TREE. it rattles and a single leaf floats gracefully down, landing on the tip of phineas’s nose

SYNCHRONIZED, the other children OOH and AHH in reaction

HSM IS GAY

So, I was looking through the comments on the I Don’t Dance video from HSM and some people were why asking why it’s a metaphor for gay sex and bisexuality and stuff (besides the blatant gayness of the entire scene), and also saw people saying it’s not at all about the fact the are hella gay for each other. So, putting together some of the comments along with my own observations, here we go:

In the song, dancing (typically attached to women and gay men) represents same-gender attraction and baseball (typically associated with masculinity, etc.) represents heterosexuality.

  • Ryan tells Chad; “I’ll show you that it’s one and the same.” - being gay is just as valid as being straight, and that it’s nothing to be ashamed of. Ryan is clearly proud of being able to dance.

  • “I wanna play ball now and that’s all, this is what I do. It ain’t no dance that you can show me.” Chad is unsure of how he feels about his own same-gender attraction and emphasis his opposite-gender attraction by saying that nothing Ryan ever ‘shows him’ will change that.

  • Ryan encourages Chad to ‘swing like him’. Bearing in mind that Ryan is strongly implied to be gay and the word swing is often used with regards to sexuality, i.e. “I don’t swing that way.”
  • Chad displays stereotypical masculine bravado, he is clearly trying to impress Ryan, he tells him; “I’ve got what it takes… so you better spin that pitch you’re gonna throw me.” While reasserting his definite heterosexuality he adds; “I’ll show you how I swing.”
  • Chad also implies that he experiences gay feelings but represses them when Ryan tells him; “You’ll never know if you never try.” Chad replies; “There’s just one thing that stops me every time.” This shows his fear of social rejection and his own internalised homophobia.
  • As the song progresses this becomes more obvious. Chad goes from saying he doesn’t dance to saying that he can’t even though it’s clear he’s actually a good dancer as well as being skilled at baseball.
  • From this scene we can gather that Chad is bisexual and Ryan is either bisexual or gay (the producers originally wanted to make Ryan canonically gay, so I’d go with that one).
  • On top of this there is the obvious underlying sexual tension running throughout the song. They switch between confrontational and flirty; there’s a lot of smiling and eyebrow action going on, and when they do dance they get all up in each other’s personal space.
  • The song ends with Ryan falling on top of Chad. In the following scene, they have switched clothes.
Mean What You Say
  • INFJ: Of course I don't mean everything I say! 90% of what comes out of my mouth is an articulated strategy to fight off my crippling fear of social rejection by winning other people's approval with carefully pre-constructed arguments based on their own interests and opinions
  • ENFP: That doesn't sound very healthy
  • INFJ: Hahahah what are you talking about?
5

GHOSTBUSTERS, 2016, dir. Paul Feig

A significant issue this movie points out is the way men and women are socialized to treat rejection: boys have to fight bullies back; women should internalize and take the high road. The villain of this movie is a guy who was derided as weird/bullied ever since he was a kid - but so were our heroines. ¾ of the women took it in stride but you can tell it’s had a big effect on Erin, her behavior, and how she quantifies/qualifies her work. Patty didn’t let her oddball tastes keep her from being a happy, friendly person. Abby and Holtzman embraced their weirdness and ignored the haters, making significant friendships (/possibly more) in the process. They do not need external validation.

On the other hand, a man feels he’s owed inherent respect and when he feels his so-called genius is not being suitably revered, he lashes out with violence. There is no “live and let live” philosophy here; people need to pay with their lives for the humiliation they’ve wrought (many of them unknowingly).

Just something else I love about an imperfect movie which should also be applauded for catering not a whit to the male gaze.

Magic - Basic Knowledge

Bravery

Chapter 1

Origin characteristics:

Bravery is the only trait that can be divided in physical and moral aspects. This is usually balanced in each wizard but there would rarely be a subject that possesses more or less of one aspect compared to the other.

Physical Bravery resists very well everything that is physical pain, hard work, exhaustion or the possibility of receiving injuries or even death

Moral Bravery allows you to act correctly despite the dishonor, shame, or social rejection you might get from your decisions

These aspects do not define a wizard’s magic power but it might be an issue for the subject’s magic if it affects them personally. This would only happen if the two aspects are not well balanced, but as mentioned earlier, it is very unlikely to happen.
——————————
M-BK Volume 1

Oh, sleepovers. Nothing is better than spending a night with your bestfriends overdosing on junk food, laying around in your most comfortable and embarrassing pajamas and watching five movies in a row. Sleepovers can either be extremely relaxing or hard to recover from, but they are so funny and irreplaceable that I personally think there should be an international Sleepover Night. 

Movies, obviously, are a must-be according to the Sleepover Bible (made up by me right now), but sometimes it can be hard to choose what to watch. I guess one of the best ways to decide is having a marathon or establishing a theme: you can watch the whole Harry Potter/Pirates of the Caribbean/Star Wars saga, go for a tv series like Friends or Grey’s Anatomy or follow a fil rouge that links together a few films.

What I’m proposing you today is one of my favourite themes: teen movies from 1990 to 2000. Beside being extremely funny and unmissable if you are a movie amateur, they definitely left a mark in the filmmaking history, defining a generation not so far in time from ours. They can also teach you something about style or pop culture, so you have no excuses left not to watch them!

JAWBREAKER (1999)

People worshipped them and cursed them, but everybody wanted to be them .

In Jawbreaker you have all the ingredients for a classic teen movie: a high school, a popular and mean clique of Queen Bees, a kind-hearted girl loved by everyone, a prom, hot guys - with the only exception that this is not a classic teen movie.

Jawbreaker is a dark comedy and (surprise!) it involves a kidnapping, a death and police investigations. Written and directed by David Stein, the movie revolves around the “Flawless Four” of Reagan High School, Los Angeles:  Courtney Shayne, Marcie Fox, Julie Freeman and Elizabeth Purr. They all rule the school with a terror regime, except for Liz. She is not as mean as her friends and makes no differences in relating with others - her beauty and honesty, then, make her the most loved and admired girl. 

Obviously, this generates jealousy in Courtney, Marcie and Julie, who decide to prank their friend on seventeenth birthday, by performing a fake kidnapping. They take her off guard early in the morning, binding her with ropes and pushing a jawbreaker candy into her mouth. The girls lock Elizabeth in the trunk of a car and drive towards the mall to celebrate their friend’s brithday with breakfast. However, once they open the trunk, the sight is definitely not what they expected it to be…

Jawbreaker is worth watching not only for the twisted, surprising plot and the iconic (and definitely realistic) language used by the girls, but also because it explores the dynamics of a group of girls with the voice of an outsider, Fern Mayo, who finds herself involved in the events against her will. This movie is gonna make you laugh, startle and maybe regret not living in 1999.

Cruel Intentions (1999)

In the game of seduction there’s only one rule: never fall in love.

Drugs, sex, a hot step-brother, games of seduction, classy and total black outfits, rich mansions. If you like this list, Cruel Intentions is the perfect movie for you. Beside having an incredibly attractive cast, a young Reese Witherspoon included, its plot twists the usual “mean clique” dynamics.

Set in a wealthy Manhattan, the film is about an oddly assorted couple: Sebastian Valmont and his step-sister Kathryn Merteuil. He’s well known for his countless sexual conquers and seductive manners, which perfectly match Kathryn’s inner wickedness and malice - but they always both manage to get away with it thanks to their fascinating looks and charming attitudes. 

The tight relationship between the two not only sees them accomplices in many misdeeds, but also gives rise to explicit sexual innuendos, as Sebastian’s not-so-secret fantasy is to sleep with Kathryn. Despite wishing the same, the girl likes to play it hard to get, so she decides to set up a bet: if Sebastian will be able to seduce Annette Hargrove, Kathryn will have sex with him - otherwise, she’ll get his vintage Jaguar. It’s not as easy as it seems: Annette is the daughter of their school’s headmaster and has recently written an article on saving her virginity for marriage.

As the time goes by and the relationship with Annette develops, Sebastian will find his controversial morals hardly tested. He’ll also have to manage the seduction of the young and naive Cecile, the new girlfriend of Kathryn’s ex, and he’ll be soon torn between his usual lifestyle and a wager maybe too hard to win, even for his unbeaten ego.

Cruel Intentions is weird, explicit, somehow shocking. It points out the differences between boys and girls as it comes to sex, providing a few interesting reflections under a chic, witty and dark atmosphere. Kathryn’s outfits are ICONIC and the movie will make you want more - and you’re lucky, because there are a prequel and a sequel.

Clueless (1995)

Dear diary, I’m more fabulous than five minutes ago.

I don’t even know how to start with this and if you’ve never seen Clueless before… oh my gosh, you can’t imagine what you’ve missed. This movie is p-e-r-f-e-c-t! 

Yes, we have a Queen Bee, Cher, with her sidekick Dionne. And yes, she’s vain and superficial. But she is funny, gorgeous, good natured, harmless and extremely relatable. You could easily make any quote from her character yours, really. She’s crazy wealthy and lives in a mansion in Beverly Hills, obviously being the most popular girl at school.

The movie explores Cher’s life and her attempts at making “good deeds”, showing how her attitude is more innocent than biased. She decides to give Tai Frasier, a “tragically unhip” girl, a makeover aimed at initiating her into the popular universe of their high school; she tries to act as cupid and match two professors (also to raise her grades); all of this, just for the sake of “giving back to the community”.

Cher’s hilarious adventures continue as she finds herself facing a new, attractive boy at school, her annoying stepbrother, the driving license exam and other teenage things we’ve all been through. I loved this movie because she’s fierce and self confident in a positive way, for once - and I won’t even mention the outfits of almost every character, which I’ve seen more than once reinterpreted in the latest collections of many fashion brands. And let me add that Alicia Silverstone’s facial expressions are the best thing in the world… In a few words: watch it. You won’t absolutely regret it.

The Craft (1996)

“You girls watch out for those weirdos” - “We are the weirdos, mister”

Everyone loves a bit of magic. Candles, chanting odd words, summoning the supernatural, meeting in the middle of the night - all things you probably don’t do but that still sound fascinating and attractive, especially if you are a young girl with a mysterious past in a new school where you know no one.

This is how it goes for Sarah Bailey once she arrives to the catholic academy of St. Benedict, Los Angeles. A group of outcasts, with difficult, gloomy lives and rumored to be practicing witchcraft, notices that Sarah is not as normal as she seems, thus luring her into joining their coven. The powers of the four girls reach a whole new level as they try to fix their messy lives and make up for any wrong that had been unfairly done to them.

However, nothing is easy when it comes to unearthly powers - the group will face difficult personal struggles and they will soon understand that everything comes with a price. 

This thriller will open your eyes on the hard life of social rejects in a surreal way, making you think twice before exposing someone not as lucky as you - you never know what may be their revenge. I loved The Craft because it explores a different side of the world depicted in the movies listed above - it gives voice to the unheard and shows things from a different point of view.

10 Things I Hate About You (1999)

But mostly, I hate the way I don’t hate you, not even close.

Sisters can be so different. Take Bianca and Kat Stratford, for example. One is popular, beautiful, admired and elegant, the other is a smart, casual, ironic bookworm. Cameron James (and adorable Joseph Gordon-Levitt) is head over heels for Bianca as soon as he sees her, but he’s warned by a friend that the girl’s father doesn’t allow her to date anyone. This doesn’t only upset Cameron, but Bianca as well - that’s why before the prom she quarrels with her dad until he agrees on letting her go at one condition: Kat has to find a boyfriend and go to the prom, too, causing Bianca to become furious since her sister will never want to be with someone.

Cameron finds out about the new rule and decides to find a boy who will date Kat, so then he’ll be able to go out with Bianca. The mission seems impossible, but of course we have Heath Ledger, in the role of Patrick Verona, who once again becomes the hero and (obviously with a heavy salary) agrees on trying.

Will the mission stay professional? Will Kat resist to Patrick’s charm or will she be trapped by the good-looking outcast as bitter as she is? Will Bianca go to prom with Cameron? You need to watch the movie to find out. This is one of my favourite ones, I’ve seen it at least three times and it’s just great - I always like watching the development of a romantic relationship, because each one is different from the other. And the singing scene on the bleachers? Iconic.

Romeo + Juliet (1996) - trailer

If love be rough with you, be rough with love.

Do I even have to say something?? I mean, Leo DiCaprio, Shakespeare’s most known masterpiece, love and death, Baz Luhrmann. This is enough, isn’t it?

Romeo + Juliet is the modernized and adapted version of the famous, tragic love story. It’s visionary, surreal, heartbreaking and it should be seen at least once a week because it’s just too much. It is set in a imaginary Verona Beach, where the adventures and deeds of two families in war intertwine with the forbidden love affair of a young boy and girl. The plot follows Shakespeare’s script, but you won’t find swords or horses. Guns and sportscars, gas stations and a swimming pool are just a few of the innovative twists Luhrmann has used in this dreamy and loud film.



What about you? What are your favourite 90ies/sleepover movies? Let us know by commenting this post, the Facebook page or sending an ask! x

anonymous asked:

If you're still doing the drabble thing could you do “Hey, hey, calm down. They can’t hurt you anymore." for tree bros. If it's not to much to ask, that is.

This is probably ooc, but I hope you enjoy it!


Contrary to popular belief, Connor Murphy is not, in fact, the worst kid in school.

Sure, there was the whole Mrs. G/printer fiasco in second grade, but, aside from that isolated incident, Connor hasn’t done much that would label him as a bad kid. He turns in his homework on time, he does well on tests, and he doesn’t talk to people in class. Well, that last part is less because he’s a good kid and more because he doesn’t have any friends to speak of and so doesn’t have anyone to speak to in class, but still. He doesn’t get into fights. Not really. Connor’s shoved a kid or two in his grade, but that’s always just been in response to someone being an asshole to him, and he shouldn’t get in trouble for standing up for himself. But he does.

Not that he even has to stand up for himself much; there aren’t even that many kids who dare to bother him since he shoved that one kid in the parking lot and the kid ended up with a broken ankle. Which wasn’t Connor’s fault—how was he supposed to know the kid was going to lose his balance and take a dive off the edge of the pavement? And isn’t it the school’s fault that they built the parking lot right beside a ditch so if someone trips or is gently pushed they’ll fall straight into the ditch? But, Connor digresses. The only kids who really bother him are the few brave souls desperate enough to be considered cool that they’re willing to bother the school’s resident psychopath, and even they have started laying off of him recently. Connor guesses everyone’s started in on the kids even lower on the middle school food chain than him.

Which brings us to now, when Connor’s standing outside the boys’ restroom in the science wing, listening to Evan Hansen’s stuttering explanation of why he doesn’t have any lunch money to give whatever dipshit cornered him in the bathroom peppered with an obscene amount of apologies. Seriously, this kid is apologizing a lot for someone who’s being harassed.

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en.wikipedia.org
Social rejection

Ever given anyone the silent treatment?

What did you hope to accomplish?

My mom used to give my brother and me the silent treatment when she got mad at us as children.
We corrected her once.
She didn’t talk to us for a week.
I was in elementary school.

So, I suppose it’s especially hurtful to me now when a friend ignores me or gives me the silent treatment.

If they’re just mad at me, I wish they’d talk to me about it.
If they don’t want to be friends anymore, I wish they’d tell me so I would know not to bother them.

It’s a behavior I don’t understand, and it really hurts.

Have you experienced the silent treatment?

How do you cope with someone who ignores you?

Do you assume they don’t want anything to do with you and just leave them alone?

Consider that the ability to concentrate without distraction on hard tasks is becoming increasingly valuable in an increasingly complicated economy. Social media weakens this skill because it’s engineered to be addictive. The more you use social media in the way it’s designed to be used — persistently throughout your waking hours — the more your brain learns to crave a quick hit of stimulus at the slightest hint of boredom.

Once this Pavlovian connection is solidified, it becomes hard to give difficult tasks the unbroken concentration they require, and your brain simply won’t tolerate such a long period without a fix. Indeed, part of my own rejection of social media comes from this fear that these services will diminish my ability to concentrate — the skill on which I make my living.

The idea of purposefully introducing into my life a service designed to fragment my attention is as scary to me as the idea of smoking would be to an endurance athlete, and it should be to you if you’re serious about creating things that matter.

anonymous asked:

Why do you think girls claim to "be in love" with Eric and Dylan? Or worship them?? It's funny how they're still talked about when they did something so tragic

Good question! And funnily enough, I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. (Beware, this answer may be long). I’m gonna compare two seperate situations here. In 2015, Frances Bean Cobain (bless her beautiful soul) did an interview for Rolling Stone mag to which she shared life after the death of her infamous dad, Kurt cobain. She shared a quote that stuck out to me: “Even though Kurt died in the most horrific way possible, there is this mythology and romanticism that surrounds him, because he’s 27 forever. The shelf life of an artist or musician isn’t particularly long. Kurt has gotten to icon status because he will never age”. I think the same goes with Eric & Dylan, here’s why. Just like Frances said of Kurt, they will forever be 17 & 18, and just like the shelf life of a musician isn’t forever, neither is being a teenager, but for them it is. And there is plenty of romanticism that circulates around the two boys, because of the things we know of them. The things they wrote in their diaries, accounts we’ve heard from their friends & Sue Klebold, it all adds up to that of the life of what a lot of teenagers go through, but don’t speak out about. They’re almost like a voice, if you will, for the angst, sad, rejected, bullied. They’re also a voice for the ones keeping destructive secrets on the inside. Poster boys for the social rejects. Not to say they were two completely isolated individuals, because I know they had friends, but it’s what they felt personally, on the inside that gets a lot of people going “yeah, you know what I get that”. And so with that, I think a lot of people (fan girls etc) find comfort in it, the thought of being forever young as well, as gruesome as it sounds. Not to say their actions should be over looked and that what happened was okay, but it’s their story that people hold onto so much. And not having the basement tapes, only having limited info about the duo creates mystery too. In short: I think people look up to them/obsess/relate because they’ll never age, and although not everyone has homicidal thoughts, you can’t say you’ve never felt partially at least one emotion that we know they did. It’s a “this is what 15 feels like” kind of thing.