sobs this took me so long

Entry #288

I received a phone call from the hospital and nearly burst into tears right then and there. I was terrified, couldn’t bring myself to answer it but eventually I did (mainly because Mimi was nudging my hand, it felt like a sign).

I was greeted to a really gravelly voice which said “Hey, what took you so long?” It took me about five seconds to recognise that it was Rei, and that’s when I really started to cry. He couldn’t get a word in past my loud sobbing and sincere apologies until I heard him speaking in the soft tone he usually uses.

He told me that he wasn’t mad at me, and that he was hurting but not drastically. I told him that I wanted him home and he agreed with me. Hopefuly, it’s not going to be long now, I can’t wait to see him in person again, make sure that he’s completely okay and give him the biggest hug I can. It wasn’t a long conversation, as the nurse that was near him needed to take the phone back eventually. I’m just glad I got to speak to Rei, even a little bit!


wow… it’s been 13 years. where do i even begin to say how proud i am of how far dbsk has come? as changmin once said (i paraphrase, since i can’t find the exact interview) that being together for 10 (and more) years was an accomplishment by itself, regardless of the number of fans they had or the number of awards they had won. that the fact that they could make people happy around the world was rewarding in itself, and their long journey was fulfilling in itself.

honestly, this gifset is not enough to encompass all that you have done. whether one considers the numbers above small or big, according to me, you have accomplished so much more than just your awards and milestones. i think you have shown your fans the true meaning of working hard and not giving up, no matter how many obstacles fall your way. from the start, you’ve had a tough journey and yet you’ve persevered. being broke, having sasaengs, having anti-fans, having practically no audience in a foreign country, being lonely in a foreign country, broadcasting at the weirdest timings, having an insane schedule, splitting up, dealing with more anti-fans, almost not returning as a duo, losing huge amounts of fans, amongst so many other things. and yet, all of you have come out stronger and better. 

even with those difficulties, you have strived to show the best of you to us, and there has hardly been a moment you have not made us proud. so, be it as five or two, thank you for carrying the name of ‘dong bang shin ki’ far and wide across the world. thank you being such a huge part of what k-pop is today, and thank you for giving your 110% all the time, even though you know you don’t have to. thank you for everything in the past 13 years, and here’s to many more to come. 

gifs are from: the latest tour, with: live tour 2015
compilation of statistics can be found here.

alex not being able to say the actual words was so painfully realistic like god knows how long it took me and so many other lesbians to be able to say we’re lesbians or even gay. she was just so choked up like “…what you said.” she didn’t want to repeat it she’s just starting to think about it and it was so beautifully and realistically written i’m sobbing

I was so unhappy before. Self worth and self love wasn’t in my vocabulary. I hated everything about myself, I would cry myself to sleep almost every night. My father would always tell me, “Davina you need to be smart, because with the way you are you’ll never be athletic.” And for so long I believed him and in 2014 I finally took my life back. Fitness saved my life, it gave me something I could control. My father left and so did a lot of my friends I didn’t know what to do and it scared me that I couldn’t control anything in my life. I remember August 15, 2014 I was sobbing on my bed and then I looked in the mirror and told myself “Maybe I was meant to be fat and ugly and I just have to deal with it.” But then I realized how dumb that sounded. Why was I MEANT to be UNHAPPY? And on that day I changed EVERYTHING, my way of thinking, my way of eating, my way of living. I found Blogilates and and for the first time I was enjoying myself, I was finally proud of myself. Today I still working on a few emotional things but over all I’m so much happier! And I have God to thank. I’m thankful for Showing me this site, Blogilates, and of corse I’m so thankful for all of you are your endless support.


anonymous asked:

This is my first time requesting anything on tumblr so sorry if I'm awkward😣 I was wondering if you could do a Yoosung imagine where him and mc are arguing then Yoosung mentioned Rika and the mc get angry and exposes the truth about her😲 Thanks❤

thank you so much for sending me your first request ever!! I’m so sorry this took so long :3 i really hope you see this!

Rika’s Exposure Pt. 1

It was late at night when you finally got home. The mellow street lights spilled through the window and lit up the dark hallway leading towards Yoosung’s room. He’s probably asleep, you thought. But just as you were about to open the door to your room, you heard a light sobbing. You closed your eyes in attempt to contain your growing anger, jealousy and irritability. With a sigh, you let go of your door handle, and went to his instead. There he was, huddling against the corner of his bed, shaking in pain again. You looked around him and noted the pictures of Rika he had scattered across the bed sheets. His head was buried deep into his knees and he whimpered ever so slightly at the realization of your presence. 

It was the 5th time this month. As if mentioning her at least once every day wasn’t already enough, he’d have episodes of depression about her over and over. You didn’t understand why he couldn’t move on. Of course, everyone has their own way of grieving, but wasn’t this a little too much? It annoyed you whenever he brought her up. What did she have to do with your favourite ice cream flavour? What did she have to do with going to an amusement park? What did she have to do with celebrating your birthday? It made you angry, and more than anything, extremely jealous.

Tentatively, you sat down on his bed, careful not to wrinkle his sacred photos, and you reached out for his clenched fists. He flinched at your touch. 

“Yoosung, please stop crying. Rika’s-”

“RIKA’S GONE! SHE’S GONE! I KNOW AND I JUST CAN’T…” his body was shaking violently.

“Yoosung…” he raised his head slowly at your soft voice and allowed you to see the mess he had become. His eyes, red and swollen, watered nonstop and his blond locks stuck to his tear stained cheeks. “It’s already been 2 years. I know it hurts, but V is right. You need to learn to let her go. You can’t just continue to waste your life away and-”

Before you had time to react, Yoosung had slapped you hard across the face. You stared at him, bewildered, unable to comprehend the situation until you felt a stinging heat rush into your cheeks. Then he grabbed you roughly by the collar and yelled at you with a terrifying, twisted expression.


Don’t know a thing huh?


Wrong? What did we ever do wrong?


Don’t say it, Yoosung. Don’t.


That was it. That was your breaking point. You had promised V that you wouldn’t say a word about Rika to him, but that was the last straw.

“I know.” you whispered, looking straight into his purple eyes, “I always knew that you loved Rika more than me, but I still stuck around, didn’t I? You say I don’t know anything about Rika, right? Well guess what? I happen to know that she’s still very much alive, she’s also the one who tortured Saeran into attacking the RFA; I also happen to know that she’s the one who blinded V, and that she was the one who-”


Yoosung pushed you to the floor and threw the everything he had laying around him at you. As if luck just wasn’t going to be on your side at all that day, he hit you in the head with his alarm clock. The glass cracked on impact and cut your bruising cheek. 


Without another word you stood up and left his room. Did you regret your words? Did you feel guilty? You couldn’t tell. All you knew was that it was too late to turn back. It was too late to take back the words you said, and it was too late to fathom the thoughts of ever seeing him again.

Sorry if it didn’t really fit what you wanted? :3 and I tend to write in second person… anyway it’s a bit angsty ik but what else can i do lololol.

~Cherry L.

Part 2: click here

Part 3: click here

Part 4: click here

Masterpost: click here

Askbox/Requests: click here

All Apologies - Tate Langdon x Reader

REQUESTED:  Reader tells him that she loves him like never loved anyone before, she loves him more than her family, herself and more than life (she doesn’t know he’s a ghost) he kills her (he keeps doing that in my asks x) ) and she’s not mad when she finds out the truth, just happy. - @ambrissis

Okay guys sorry for the long gap here, my muse took a vacation I guess. I hope you like this it made me emotional a little. I think I’m just missing AHS a lot and it’s got me down. xoxoxox WARNING: SMUT

Sobs racked your body as you slid down the closed door in your room. Your chest was aching and empty, and it was a feeling you’d come to know so well in the past few months. The feeling of sadness that had seeped into your veins recently would not go away, and there was nothing you could do that would numb the pain. The only time you got a reprieve from it was when you were with Tate.

Keep reading

Intuition (Osomatsu/Reader)
In which Osomatsu’s S/O finally breaks down.

It took me way too long to work up the courage to post this but god writing it made me so emotional, I couldn’t let that go to waste. If you wanna get as wrecked as me, listen to this while you read.

I may write a follow-up next week (or just write more in general) if people like this, but the way it goes is 100% dependent on what happens in Episode 25. Anyways, yeah, feedback would be appreciated!;;

Keep reading


hi everyone! (◡‿◡✿) sorry for being super inactive in the past months ;; uni is not easy y’know hahaha //sobs.
anyway i’m honored to present you my first follow forever EVER because i didn’t had the time ??? and motivation to make a follow forever before, also i reached a new follower goal this week and i want to celebrate with every single one of my followers and mutuals ♡. 
I’m happy to see all of you in my dash, so thanks a lot and happy holidays! this has been a great year for me and i hope that 2017 will be a better year for everyone! /hugs/.

☆ A-K 

@aflightlesscrow@akakaashi, @akame-jpg, @amekori, @chiinobi, @chizurun, @ctrbl, @dazayama, @diosea, @feeljapan@fksehun, @fuyukai-desu, @himemiyay, @hipireon, @hiwazumi, @hiyorichans, @kamuisyato@kayuui, @kazuoha, @kazzuma, @kenma-san, @kiuroo, @kominatoryosuke, @koshishio, @kurrapika, @ky-soo

☆ L-R 

@midorimas, @mihkoriz, @miiyazono, @miizutae, @mitsukamis, @miuroko, @miyakox, @mizudou, @moerins, @nanzse, @natzumes, @nhikiforov, @nichigou, @nikiphorov, @notsuyuki, @oikawaii, @pastelkeiji, @peach-suga, @pinkawa, @priincessyona, @redthreadoflove

☆ S-Z

@sesukes, @setterkawa, @softjimns, @sparckle-cat, @s-shirayuki-hime, @sugaen@tachibana–chan@tsuuki, @tsvguhito, @uzurume, @warmedrice, @woohanya, @yamazekis, @yoongies, @yumekiko, @yurionclouds, @yushiyuki, @yuus, @zefile


cross my heart and hope to die

maplemesyrup  asked:

UT US UF Skelebros come home to find their s/o sobbing their eyes out on the couch, going throw boxes of tissues. Their favorite tv show just killed off their favorite character. How would the bros comfort them? (This just happened to me, please, i need something to heal my poor broken heart)

I’m sorry that this took so long. I hope your poor heart is ok :(

UT:Sans: He wraps you up in a blanket and teleports out to get you some food from grillby. Puts on another happier show to watch to take your mind off of it. Maybe even some episodes of the same show but where your fave is still alive. Lots of jokes and puns to cheer you up. He’s not the kind of person who’d react this strongly over something like this. The resets have taught him that good things don’t last. He still understands your sadness. He’s there for you as long as you need it.

UT!Papyrus: He gets really sad too. He might not even know the character but death makes him really uncomfortable and that mixed with you being an emotional wreck right now kind of sets him off. He wants you to do something that can take your mind off of things (his too, but that’s not important) this might involve a physical activity of various degrees depending on how up for it you are. He suggests going out for a walk, anything to get you out of the house. If you really don’t want to he’ll understand. Still wont let you sit on the couch for the rest of the evening. Anything else is fine.

US!Sans: It stresses him out a lot. Chances are he’s very informed on the subject of this tv show from you telling him about it. He might have even watched an episode once or twice so he gets really upset too. Ends with you two grieving together. He gets you tissue boxes and lots of water since he doesn’t want you to get dehydrated. Lots and lots of cuddles. He puts on a disney movie to take your mind off of things. Depending on the movie he choose this might be for better or for worse.

US!Papyrus: Look, he really likes watching tv shows with you. It enables him to do sappy couple things while laying on a couch. He’s watched pretty much every show that you’ve ever been into. He’s  low-key salty that you watched the episode without him. If it was a show that he was actually into and actively following he’s high-key salty that you watched it and also spoiled it for him. Takes pity on you in your grief though. He’ll just silently grab you another box of tissues and some comfort food and then cuddle up with you. Might put on a movie or something with your fave characters actor. (After making sure that they don’t die in it)

UF!Sans: He just um… He wasn’t prepared for this. He’s not really the best at emotional support or comfort. He’s doing his best though. Awkwardly sits beside you and pats your back because he is really not sure what to do right now. He listens to you rant about how stupid the show is for killing them off and how much you loved the character. If it’s something he’s good at, it’s being angry so he hops onto your anger. When you’re done crying and are just kind of hiccuping he gets you a glass of water and puts on a movie. If the show that made you cry is supernatural, he might tell you that there’s like a 50% chance that they’ll come back again. This comment is more likely to earn him 10 more minutes of ugly crying then anything.

UF!Papyrus: The bastard just rolls his eyes at you. Tells you to get over it already, crying over a tv show is just unnecessary. (He is such a hypocrite, he cried watching a disney film once. Romantic dramas are what really gets him though) When he notices that you’re actually upset he softens a little. Gets you something to drink and holds you for a while. He usually makes dinner by himself to ensure that it turns out perfect, but this time he asks you to help him. He needs to get your mind off of things for a while. And by asking you to help him I mean that you’re allowed to hang around and watch him cook. If you’re real lucky he’ll let you chop some vegetables. He’s a perfectionist so not doing everything by himself stresses him out a little. Still, he’s willing to suffer a little for his s/o.

It took me some time to be able to take a step forward and leave you in the past where you should belong. It took me countless sleepless nights, long hours spent in the bathroom crying, months of feeling lonely and unwanted. It took me so long to be able to finally take you out of my system. There were days when all I thought about was you walking out of my life. I had several shot sessions with friends, thinking that alcohol could numb the pain and make me forget you only to realize that even with alcohol in my system, I can still see you. There were nights when my own sobs became my lullaby to sleep; when I learned to value sleep more because that’s the only time I get to see you again and hold you – in my dreams. I stalked your SNS accounts, looking for signs that you missed me too. I tried to reconnect, to make you realize that I am the right person for you but to no avail. You pushed me away every time, told me that I should stop moping and grieving about what happened to us because you are never coming back. It took so long for those lethal words to sink in. And when they did, I felt free. The heavy feeling in my heart went away. I find myself smiling at everyone I see. I find joy in the littlest things. My friends all looked so happy when they noticed that I’ve let you go. I know I have become stronger and better, as a person. I don’t hate you anymore. Nor do I blame myself for your leaving. I still love you, but in a different way now. I don’t cringe when I hear your name anymore. The butterflies that filled my tummy back then whenever I see you has flown away for good. And I can say that I am happy. Thank you for pushing me away when I tried to patch things up. I finally learned to love myself and know my worth. Thank you for the memories, the laughters, the tears. It has been a tough journey, but it’s worth it – you were a lesson learned.
—  Letter to my Ex #2 (m.b)

anonymous asked:

Okay so I've never even heard of The Borgias but there is SO MUCH on my dash these days and now I'm intrigued. What would u recommend about the show? (Also I love ur blog, have a nice day!)

*cracks knuckles* Oh anon, get ready.

I could wax poetic about how phenomenal the actors are, how realistic the sets and wardrobes are ahem so much so that they bankrupted the show, how poignant the dialogue is, how wonderfully the show juggles power and morals and violence and love… But instead I’ll just give you a handy-dandy little list of some of my favorite things. Borgias friends/followers/randos, please feel free to add to it. :)

Reasons to watch The Borgias:

  • The intro alone. Honestly, I can and will and have recommended this show just on the basis of its intro/main theme. If you’re like me and watch a lot of TV, you’ll know that you’ve found a good show when that show has a good intro—particularly one that has tiny little details that change every episode or every season. When you’ve found a show that puts hard work into its intro, you can be certain the rest will be good. Plus, those strings. And the chants. I dare you to listen to it and not dance in your seat.
  • Jeremy Irons.
  • François Arnaud.
  • Holliday Grainger.
  • ^These actors put so much work into their characters. Their portrayals are so intense, so detailed, that I quite literally cannot picture anyone else but these three when I think of Pope Alexander VI, Cesare Borgia, and Lucrezia Borgia. They’re who I picture.
  • Holliday, I think, merits extra attention, because she grows/matures/devolves (call it what you will) the most over the course of the three season. She starts as this perfect, angelic, innocent little pawn… And throughout the course of the show she becomes an incredibly smart, powerful, and determined woman. She don’t take no shit.
  • Historical accuracy. Now, I’m not saying the show is a documentary, that every bit has been meticulously researched… But a lot of it has. For some of the more extreme goings-on depicted on the show, I’ve stopped and looked them up, thinking, This is so ridiculous. Why is the show lowering itself to this gross level where everything’s about murder and sex?! It doesn’t have to do this! …But then you go and look up the history, and for the most part, they’re playing by the book. Almost every insane thing that happens in the show either did happen in real life or was heavily rumored to have happened.
  • Finally, and I feel like I’m scaring you away even mentioning it, but this show handles incest really well. If you know anything about the Borgias going in, you probably know that one of them bought his way into the papacy and that they were all manipulative murderers that slept with each other and plotted to take over the world. And while there isn’t anything conclusive one way or another on the incest, I think the show deals with that particular rumor very, very well, and you’ve got François and Holliday to thank for it. They really, really sell it, to the point that even if you don’t end up liking them together, you understand where they’re coming from and why things between them got to that rather heartbreaking point.
  • Also, did I mention the intro?

This was supposed to be short, anon. I’m sorry. I just get really intense about my favorite Italian Murder Fam™. Definitely try the show out, give it a few eps, and let me know what you think!!! I am always here to freak out about Cesare and Lucrezia and Pope Dad™ and Caterina and Giulia and many others. (I’m also here to hate on Juan.) LET ME KNOW IF YOU GET SUCKED IN, ANON! <3

Hermione, that’s not how you put books away.

whitewiiings  asked:

" C-Carla, wait! " white wings helped him fly across the hall, reaching her on time before leaving with wendy back to their dorms " I ... I just... I made this for you, I know it's not much but I will do it better next time!! " he hands a little handmade box with fish shaped chocolates. kinda messy yet still lucy helped him to make it look decent enough " P-Please be my Valentine!!! "

          She halted her footsteps, she sighed as exceed looked at the sky dragon slayer who politely waited for her to finish the business with the tomcat. She looked at him with her usually not impressed expression. Carla sighed placing a paw through her white fur. 

                       ❝ What do you need Tomcat. I’m trying to go home with Wendy. ❞

         She looked down now, looking at the box in his paws, sweat dropping. She was confused why he put in so much work to even make her something !! It wasn’t like they were dating like everyone in this crazy Guild. She gently took the box and opened it, seeing the fish shaped chocolate and sighed once more. He knew she didn’t like fish… It had a horrible smell and it tasted worst. But seeing the effort he tried to make this for her. Well, she secretly loved it.

         A small smile began to form on the features of the exceed. Remaining silent as Wendy giggled in the background. She sighed once more acting this time, making it look like she was thinking about how to answer him. Carla wanted to keep him in suspense for a little. 

                      ❝ Fine…… Happy. I guess I can be your valentine. Just this ONCE, though. ❞