Another stupid Sherlock fic idea I’d love to see used as a prompt:

Sherlock somehow discovers the wealth of fan art (i.e. porn) on Tumblr about him and John. He’s never been in a physical relationship before, but he’s starting to realize he’d quite like to try sex with John. Luckily, Tumblr seems to have no end of illustrated guides for wooing John (or so he believes).

John, of course, is totally broadsided when Sherlock basically greets him one day with “I bought you milk, jam, and new red pants, and made you tea. I believe that’s the appropriate courting ritual. Can we have sex now? I know what you like because I’ve done my research on the internet.”

Piece of Cake

john laurens x reader

prompt: john decided to propose to you on the most romantic day of the year by slipping your ring in your dessert during dinner. his plans don’t go accordingly though.

a/n: aha let’s pretend i was able to post this yesterday and i’m still on schedule 


To say John was nervous was a complete and utter understatement.

He’s been thinking about this all day and all night. He always had the velvet box in his coat pocket, fiddling with the lid and running his fingers over the smooth fabric. He constantly repeated the speech he prepared in his head till it was the only thing he thought about besides you.

John didn’t know how to settle until the day of his proposal came around. Even then, he still didn’t settle. If anything, his anxiousness increased.

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Come and Get Me

Come and Get Me

Fic Summary: You and Ryan have a chance meeting where you bond over comics. Unfortunately, you forget to give him your number and are worried you missed your chance. Until you see a poster for Let’s Play: Live, and you vow not to make the same mistake twice. Masterpost Fic Song. 

Rating: NC-17

Warnings: Fluffy & Smut

A/N: Alright, so I am not “returning” to Ryan/Reader inserts per se. This wonderful story was actually commissioned, and the beautiful person suggested I share it with you all to promote my commissions. So, I’m taking her advice! Enjoy!

Originally posted by creganstarks

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Our First Kiss// Sherlock Holmes

Originally posted by explosivecumberbatch

Requested by Anon:  Hi!! I was wondering if you could do a sherlock x reader, where they have their first kiss? Maybe you could write it similar to the scene between Han and Leia, and their first kiss in the millenium falcon? Sherlock like: you’re trembling. And the readers like: I’m not trembling. But then Sherlock kisses them?? It’s just an idea, you don’t have to if you don’t wanna. Thanks anyway :)):

I’ve been thinking about this for weeks, so I hope you all enjoy it!

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

His lips were always moving.

Smiling, talking, pursed, pressed..

But you wondered how they tasted.

Sherlock Holmes was infuriatingly irritating, hauntingly mesmerizing, and altogether beautiful. The only one who knew about your feelings towards the Consulting Detective was his partner John Watson, who was one of many in your circle of friends. 

The first day you knew Sherlock - he hated you because you were incredibly distracting. Why? You were beautiful. 

Within the first month he had chased away every man who was interested in you. You flirted back and forth constantly for weeks, occasionally held hands, but it never went further then that. With his personality, you never knew whether or not he was manipulating you or genuinely felt the same way. 

So of course, John had to suggest you did something about it. 

  “You are incredibly beautiful, and you have all the skills you need to reel him in. He’s the type of guy where you really just have to go for it.” John proclaimed, lifting his wine glass in the air to clink it against your own. Sherlock had specifically said he wasn’t needed for this case, and you were struggling so of course you’d called him over with red wine as incentive. 

  “If I didn’t know any better, I would say you were gay.” 

John snorted and pressed a finger against your lips as the door to the building opened. Sherlocks steps were the easiest to distinguish of everyone who ever came through 221B. “I’m not gay, but I am Mr. Love! Hop to it! I’ll be in the hall closet!” He rushed down the hall and hid himself inside the closet just as Sherlock appeared in the doorway of the kitchen. 

  “Ah y/n. Having a night in?” He commented, folding his hands against his waist as you lifted your wine glass. “For two, I assume?” Your eyes flickered over to where Johns glass had been sitting before he’d fled the premises. “Your lips are red.’’

You snorted rather loudly and stood from the table. How many glasses had you had? Four? “That’s what alcohol does to you-” You retorted, gasping as you took several steps before stumbling. Your vision was hazy, but you didn’t fail to notice the strong arms that wrapped around your waist. “Oh, now you’re way too close to me.” 

It was true. His face was just inches from your own, so close that you could smell the mint on his breath. His hands were firmly gripping your hips, twirling his thumbs in a circular motion on top of your blouse. Just the touch of his thumbs sent shivers down your spine. “You’re shaking. Is it the alcohol or the physical reaction you display when I’m around you?” His voice dropped an octave as he pressed the lower part of your body against the door that also led into the flat. Your eyes flickered down to his lips and in that moment, you made your decision. 


Your fingers slid up his chest to tug on his hair, pulling him flush against you as you propped yourself on the wall. His lips were exactly as you had always imagined; warm and soft against your own, as if they were whispering the millions of words he refused to speak aloud. You tilted your head to the side, sighing into his mouth as he teased your lips open. 

He was just beginning to explore your mouth when you pulled away, resting your forehead against his own. “I think this may be a new experiment I need to continue to… analyze.” Sherlock panted. You lifted your head to look at his dilated pupils and couldn’t help but smile just as his eyes met yours. “What? Was it that good?” 

  ‘’You kissed me.” 

  “According to my deductions of both you and myself, I think we’ve been wanting to kiss each other for months. I hope I’ve made it quite clear in the time we’ve known each other how I feel about you.” He replied. “Now I think this is what leads to me asking my next question. Would you like to be my girlfriend?” 

You were so stunned at his remark that John took the opportunity to jump out of the closet, completely hammered with the remaining red wine he’d taken in with him spilled all over his shirt. Laughter emanated in the kitchen as he threw a fist in the air and began to pound it. “Say yes!” He cried out. “They don’t call me Doctor Love for nothing, y’know!” 

Sherlock buried his face in your neck to hide his laughter. Your hands found their way underneath his chin, lightly running your thumbs across his sharp cheekbones. “It would be my greatest adventure to date you, Sherlock Holmes.” 


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@charlottemalfoy @gonnamurderyou @fourtyninekirbygamzeegirl @foureyedsiopao

Okay but imagine Hamilton getting really mad at Jefferson after a cabinet meeting so they just start yelling at each other in French and have this huge argument where no one else understands what they’re saying to each other and everyone just wants both of them to just calm the fuck down. Afterward the two just start making snide comments in French to each other under their breath whenever they pass each other.

anonymous asked:

It bugs the crap out of me that the Casablanca-ish plane scene in HLV was supposed to be two men who truly believed they'd never see each other again. Especially those two men. One or both of them MUST know that it isn't forever (my money's on John if not both), and my real gut feeling is that Janine is the one who brought Moriarty back (I'm not one that believes he's still alive, although I HOPE I'm wrong). Anyway, what do you think? Doesn't it seem unemotional on John's part at least?

Nope! I’ve written lots of metas on the tarmac scene (all linked on my meta page), and I’ve written a crack theory in which John IS responsible for Jim’s return. However, if that’s not the case, Sherlock and John’s actions and apparent emotional state on the tarmac is still spot on. I know many people feel John is unemotional, uncaring. I couldn’t disagree more. Here’s what I think it boils down to:

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Japan in the Heian Period and Cultural History: Crash Course World History 227

In which John Green teaches you about what westerners call the middle ages and the lives of the aristocracy…in Japan. The Heian period in Japan lasted from 794CE to 1185CE, and it was an interesting time in Japan. Rather than being known for a thriving economy, or particularly interesting politics, the most important things to come out of the Heian period were largely cultural. There was a flourishing of art and literature in the period, and a lot of that culture was created by women. The Tale of Genji by Murasaki Shikibu was the classic piece of literature of the day, and it gave a detailed look into the way the Aristocrats of the Heian period lived. While this doesn’t give a lot of insight into the lives of daily people, it can be very valuable, and the idea of approaching history from a cultural perspective is a refreshing change from the usual military or political history that survives from so many eras.




EURUS: Did you bring it?
SHERLOCK: I’m sorry?
EURUS: My hairband. Did you bring it like I asked?
SHERLOCK: I’m not one of the … I-I don’t work here.
EURUS: My special hairband.

EURUS: The one I made you steal, from Mummy.
EURUS: It was the last thing I said to you, remember, the day they took me away.
SHERLOCK: No, we’ve spoken since then. You came round to my flat a few weeks back; you pretended to be a woman called Faith Smith. We had chips.
EURUS: Does this mean you didn’t bring my hairband?

Even the very first time I watched ‘The final problem’ this little scene got my attention. What is it about this 'special hairband’? Why is it mentioned that often? Three times in a row? Eurus made Sherlock steal it from Mummy and that was the last thing that happened before Eurus was taken away.

  1. Eurus has no friend. She wants to play with Yellowbird/Sherlock and his inseparable friend Redbeard/Victor. That ends in a disaster.
  2. Eurus locks up Readbeard/Victor on some unknown place. She never tells where and Readbeard/Victor drowns.  He is never found..
  3. Euros tells Sherlock to steal Mummy’s special hairband. That’s the last thing that happens between them. Sherlock never brings that hairband to Eurus. But she’s still waiting for it.
  4. Eurus starts a fire and Musgrave House burns down. She is taken away to Sherrinford by Uncle Rudi. Her parents are not informed. Later they are told that Euros died in a second fire she started.. Appart from Uncle Rudi only Mycroft knows the truth.

Regarded from a symbolical point of view what could this story stand for? I don’t think Eurus is a real Person. She symbolizes something. And I begin to suspect that is also the case with Victor.

  • Eurus is described as era-defining genius when it comes to deductions. But she lacks emotions. Deductions grounded solely on logic and reason.
  • Victor is the inseparable friend. Full of emotions and love. Friendship in it’s purest form. The basis for every relationship.

What happend? Maybe this:

Sherlock thinks he has a friend. He is full of enthusiasm. But he also loves to play deductions. He is so very good with it. So Sherlock deduces his friend. And the friend is appalled, disgusted and frightened by Sherlock’s extraordinary abilities. The friend says: Piss off! and walks away. Sherlock is hurt deeply. He buries the concept of 'friendship and love’ in the deepest well he can find inside himself and walks away. Burning down the bridges and the whole place of emotions and love as well … to never come back again. Valuing from now on pure logic and reason over everything else. 'The work is all that matters’

Until Sherlock crosses paths with a certain and rather clever army doctor:

JOHN: That … was amazing.
SHERLOCK: Do you think so?
JOHN: Of course it was. It was extraordinary; it was quite extraordinary.
SHERLOCK: That’s not what people normally say.
JOHN: What do people normally say?
SHERLOCK: ‘Piss off’!

Logic and reason alone can be brilliant an great. But they only become good when they are paired with a feeling heart … full of emotions and love!



Now I’ve almost forgotten the curious case of Mummy’s special hairband. :)  

  • Logic and rason (Eurus)  tells little Sherlock to steal Mummy’s hairband
  • That’s probably because Sherlock deduces about himself that he would very much like to have such a special hairband. To use it … to play with it …. because it is pretty ….
  • Maybe Sherlock is a girls name after all?
  • Logic and reason (Euros) is still waiting for Sherlock to lay hands on that special hairband …..



@gosherlocked @isitandwonder @loveismyrevolution @monikakrasnorada @yan-yae @tjlcisthenewsexy @longsnowsmoon5 @the-7-percent-solution

casuals dont seem to understand that sherlock is only protecting mary to keep john happy. anything that happened to mary directly effects john so OF COURSE he’d vow to keep her safe because sherlock is doing it for john! hes protecting the life he thinks john loves and wants. it was never for mary. it was always for john

*Deduces John for the first time*

John “That…..was amazing”

Sherlock “You really think so?”

John “ Of course I do, it was extraordinary”

Sherlock “That´s not what people usually say”

John “What do they say”

Sherlock “Piss off”

*both laugh*

—  Every Johnlock fanfiction ever, at some point of the story.

So John Watson is that type of person. Of course it wasn’t hard to see, judging from his actions in every episode from the start to now, but it still hurts so damn much when he viciously shoves away his friends and kicks them when they’re down.
Yes, yes, I get that Mary died. Yes I get that it’s going to be horrible for him and that it’s expected that he’s going to react in a specific way due to grief. Everyone has their ways of coping and a lot of times that means shoving those closest away from you.
But to for him to give Molly, the sweetest and kindest of their friends, the order to basically tell Sherlock to fuck off if he comes asking to help, was pretty damn low.
Sure you get to be angry and yeah it’s not okay to take it out on other people, but of course you’re going to anyways it’s part of human nature. But normal grieving doesn’t include giving someone else a not to tell the person to fuck off if they try to help out because they care.
And what makes it worse is the fact that John knew that was going to happen. Everything Sherlock does that expresses emotion and caring he learned from John. So of course John would know Sherlock was going to go to Molly’s place and ask to help. And he decided to do that.
You know it doesn’t just hurt Sherlock when John shoved him away, it hurt Molly too. And this… this is just a wee bit too far. Watson went over the edge and I wouldn’t be surprised if Sherlock went straight back to his machine, emotionless methods after that because hell, Mycroft was right, to love people only does hurt you.
I’m genuinely curious as to what they’re going to do with this, seeing as Sherlock will definitely not be on the same footing as we saw him last. He’ll either be a machine or broken. Hell, I’d go so far as to think Mary wasn’t the only one killed that night.


CrashCourse is a fast, funny, irreverent look at history. In this episode, brothers John and Hank Green gives us their take on what makes Big History so darn important.

I spent a lot of time going over Mary in my head last night.  And I just feel like there are a lot of “holes” with her character.

  • Her best friend is the PA for the man who is blackmailing her.  Yes, you could say that she is keeping her enemies close, but do you really think Magnussen wouldn’t realize the connection?  It may have been a fun thing for him, but it just doesn’t feel right.
  • She shot to kill Sherlock.  I’m sorry, but she did.  As countless other people have said, you shoot to the chest there is a higher likely hood of a kill shot than a wounding shot.  And when that didn’t work, when she went hunting for him, she came intending to finish the job. Sherlock managed to talk her out of it. (Oh and side note, John’s an army war doctor he would have KNOWN that shot was meant to be a kill shot, he’s seen enough bullet wounds to know, but that’s a different story all together)
  • She may have been able to fool Sherlock, but there is NO way  Mycroft didn’t know who she was.  She was a paid for hire assassin who worked for the CIA and most likely MI6, Mycroft would have known of her.
  • That being said, you don’t just “walk away” from that lifestyle, especially if you go rouge, like we’ve been led to believe she did.
  • You also don’t get attached to someone who is famous in the news as the companion of Sherlock Holmes.  You don’t want to draw attention to yourself.
  • She’s married to John, so of course he’ll tell her he’s going out with Sherlock for the night.  She obviously attacked Janine not long after she let Sherlock into the lift.  If she was waiting for the right moment, she would have been there to overhear the conversation and recognize Sherlock’s voice.  Why didn’t she go ahead and shoot Magnussen instead of talking to him?  She would know she only had a certain amount of time before the lift arrived.  She could have shot him and been gone before Sherlock and John got there.  And Sherlock had the perfect alibi for being there.  THERE WAS THE OUT!  And she’s clever enough to know to take it.  So why didn’t she?

I’m sorry but I just feel like this was poorly thought out by the writers.

anonymous asked:

“i woke up this morning to find you sitting in my living room with a goat in a poncho??? who are you??? why is the goat wearing a poncho??? how did you get the goat in here i live on the 12th floor???” au with Lams. I don't mind what form it's in I just really need it.

omg omg okay i discussed this with @mathxjunkii so she will add anything i have left out bc i have the World’s Worst Memory

  • sooooo first the goat
  • he acquires it from this renaissance festival and he sees this goat that’s the prize of some stupid competition (archery, something with flaming arrows at least)
  • he wants this goat because john’s justice for animals stuff has gotten to him so that he sees it and is like “john! I must save him for john!!!”
  • so he wins of course and lugs this fucking goat home and carefully maneuvers it into the elevator without anyone noticing, miraculously
  • he realizes he doesn’t have his keys (ashley i forget why you specify that) and he hears the landlord coming up the stairs, and you can’t have a goat in the building
  • he lives across from john. John has accidentally left his door unlocked
  • Alex hurries in just in time and looks at this goat like “john is gonna hate me when he sees this thing what can i do to make it look less wild oh I KNOW I’LL PUT A PONCHO ON IT”
  • john of course has a poncho laying out somewhere because he’s just that type of person. alex knows this.
  • he throws it on and turns around to figure out where to put it when he trips right over the coffee table and the goat, and the goat bleeps
  • now john had heard rummaging and assumed it was alex and honestly was too asleep to get up
  • alex had gotten back late. there’s a lot to do at the renaissance festival and it’s really hard to get a goat in your car
  • so the goat bleeps and john is like i swear to the good lord above if this boy brought a goat in here…
  • he gets up and alex is cradling his head on the floor and sure enough there’s a goddamn goat in his living room
  • john’s asking all the questions (i’m taking out the “who are you” i’m sorry) but the one he ends with is “why is the goat wearing a poncho???”
  • and alexander says
  • “…’s house trained?”
  • as if john will believe it looks house trained if it’s wearing his own poncho
  • john just looks at him like “boi if you don’t”
  • aaaaaand ashely’s gonna come up with how they take care of the goat because she’s funnier than i am