so-I'm-posting

8

four pines, four days until the gravity finale ≡ stanford pines; being a hero means fighting back even when it seems impossible.

OKAY so, regarding ‘selfish, narcissistic’ Karamatsu

with the comment made by fujita that he’s only nice because he likes to see himself as being nice still going around and a lot of people taking this the wrong way or not knowing what to do with this information, fun fact- unless you were born with it (like me, probably), narcissism usually stems from extremely low self esteem which usually stems from mistreatment and once you become a narcissist, it tends to grow stronger and harder to break out of if said mistreatment continues, since it’s more of a defensive mechanism to help deal with being disliked and to mentally block it out and ignore it because it hurts too much to accept 

we’ve seen him be blatantly mistreated by his brothers so first of all there’s that but second of all, the whole ‘being kind because he wants to be seen as kind’ thing is how literally 90% of narcissists act because for one they tend not to understand how others feel and for two, their primary concern is being liked/likable out of a deeper rooted fear of rejection, further mistreatment, etc 

go back to the scene where he confides in oso about people calling him painful and notice how he doesn’t understand it, he doesn’t like it at all, and it very clearly bothers him- he tried to change himself right then and there and was extremely relieved when oso told him he didn’t HAVE to change for once

image is important to a narcissist but for most, it’s, again, because they want to be likeable and fear further rejection- for most, it goes deeper than just trying to be better than others or whatnot 

and on that note, notice that more than anyone, choromatsu and todomatsu are the ones who tend to put the others down for the sake of looking better- karamatsu hasn’t done this (yet, at least) so obviously he’s not that type of narcissist 

he genuinely WANTS to be nice but can only do so in the 'if I do this, people will like me more’ way because one, he probably doesn’t even understand true kindness since it’s rarely ever shown to him (even in kun, he tended to be the punching bag) and two, honestly, as a narcissist myself, I’ll tell you- it’s literally impossible to stop thinking about your image, it’s literally impossible to do a single thing without wondering how people will see you for it

even typing all of this, I feel I look pretty silly since I’m defending a fictional character but I don’t mind since this is all in good fun and I’m MOSTLY doing this because so many people have such an incorrect view of narcissism that I hope to fix a bit (not to mention, I was requested to give my opinion)

anyhow, as others have been saying, karamatsu’s no ANGEL, but so many people are taking this 'fake kindness’ thing the wrong way, thinking he has secret malicious intent or something- wanting to be kind to improve your image doesn’t make you ‘fake’ and in fact, he’s not even doing it for bragging rights or anything, he just wants positive attention and likely thinks someone will eventually believe 'he’s a nice guy, I like him and I’ll be nice in return' 

that’s basically THE ultimate goal for a narcissist because most NEED the attention, they NEED others to like them and want someone to notice them/approval so badly they’d do almost anything- and when this doesn’t happen, this is where the real narcissism kicks in and they’re able to tell themselves that everything is fine because THEY like themselves, they’re able to stay in their own little world where everyone really does admire them instead of just falling apart 

'that kind of narcissism’ is actually really sad

on top of that, karamatsu wasn’t like this in kun and it’s been canonly said that everything he does is deliberate and he never lets his guard down- so honestly it’s impossible for him to be kind just out of the goodness of his own heart because he’s too hyperaware of himself and of how everything he does affects how others see him 

knowing THIS, he still /chooses/ to be kind, he wants to be seen as 'that’ kind of guy and still manages to show genuine concern for others at times, even if at other times he overdoes it but sticks with it because he doesn’t want to further damage his image

with his brothers (and others, probably) always insulting him, it’s very likely that he even feels he HAS to try to mask his less than friendly side, he can’t afford to do anything wrong when they already call him shitty and haven’t stopped despite his best efforts to prove otherwise- he’s stuck and doesn’t understand why things aren’t changing but despite all of this, he still /tries/

so you have to wonder why he acts like that, where this narcissism even came from, and why it’s specifically a trait HE has out of all the others- narcissism is just so much more complex than most think

and again, this kind in particular is really sad- I’m quite sure he became a narcissist in the /first place/ as a direct result of how he’s treated

looking at esp kitty again, you can see the clear differences between how he and Ichimatsu, for example, are treated- since the brothers show more concern for him, Ichimatsu seems to be a bit more comfortable with his insecurities to the point where he doesn’t even bother hiding them, despite the fact that he has trouble expressing his emotions 

whereas the exact opposite is true for karamatsu and he’s developed narcissism likely as a direct result- he feels the need to hide his flaws to appear more likable and also probably so he himself doesn’t have to directly acknowledge them

it’s also been canonly said that karamatsu is a sensitive guy who tends to cry a lot/cry easily if he acknowledges his true emotions which is even more of a reason for him to use his narcissism as a front and something to hide behind

all of this being said, he may use being kind as a way to tell himself ‘I’m such a nice guy’ and boost his own ego but there’s no way he’s just faking all of his kinder actions with malicious intent 

also I want to point this out- fujita’s view of karamatsu is his own /personal opinion/, the actual writer of the show has said this about him:

so who really is karamatsu? ultimately that’s up to you to decide and hopefully more about him will be revealed in the future but for now it’s rather hard to say when he’s already perfected the art of hiding his true self and pretending to be someone else

4

When they told him that his Papa was gone, he thought it was normal. His Papa left all the time. Gone to see his Daddy at work, or to the market to bring back fresh oranges for him to eat. 

But he didn’t understand that gone meant forever until his Papa’s portraits were covered. Until his Papa went into the ground, and his Daddy hid away in the library for a whole, very long day. Until Papa wasn’t there to tuck him in at night, or to do the funny voices during story time. And when he finally realized what it meant, Felix held onto his Daddy’s hand as tight as he could. 

Gone Forever wouldn’t happen to his Daddy. 

Text submitted by the kind nonny.

Now I can’t can the image of Felix holding into Dorian even in his sleep. Just to make sure that his father is still there. Meanwhile Dorian can’t even have a proper breakdown. 

I’m sad.

4

Progress is so slow, but here are some of the more finished stills from my WIP Raven Cycle animation project I keep mentioning.

i need a moment to breathe.

let me preface this with THERE ARE NO SPOILERS FOR THE MOVIE IN WHAT I’M ABOUT TO WRITE.

i can’t put into words the feelings i’m feeling, but i’m gonna try. that movie was the single most best movie i have ever seen. i don’t care what anyone says, i don’t care what dipshit cock juggling no-nuts reviewers say, that movie was fucking PERFECT. it embodied all of my hopes and aspirations for this movie, every little detail that i put into my characterization, everything everything everything. i’m not joking when i say that i choked up and almost cried. it was not cool at all, but i don’t care. it wasn’t because of a sad moment or anything, it was just the fact that, in my lifetime, there was a movie that did justice to my favorite fictional character of all time. i was able to sit in a comfortable recliner seat, eat reese’s pieces and laugh at a movie i’d never thought i’d see. ever.

i never cry at movies. except toy story 3, but. anyways. i don’t. i really don’t. and i fucking teared up with deadpool of all movies. a character that has been with me since the early 2000s, when i first picked up a comic, when i first… idk. i fell in love so hard w/ his damn character and i wanted a movie, and i got fucking origins. whatever. it’s not as bad knowing that ryan reynolds wrote his own fucking lines, solidifying his status as deadpool. teasing of green lights, being ready ever since 2006 with a fucking script, just going back and forth and chomping at the bit and he FUCKING NAILED IT, GUYS. he couldn’t have done a better job. he jokes about this being the worst relationship he’s ever had? THINK ABOUT ME. IT’S LIKE TED AND ROBIN WITH THESE TWO AND I’M SITTING HERE WITH MY THUMB UP MY ASS. everything ryan did, everything paul wernick and rhett reese and tim miller did with deadpool was on point. 

ryan talks about how the movie didn’t have nearly the same budget as any other marvel movie, yet, it doesn’t feel like it at all. every last bit of it, every scene felt like it was made on oprah money. i can’t believe how perfect everything looked. the costumes, the design of colossus, the effects and everything in between. there’s nothing i can think of that needed to be touched up on. i cannot stress enough that in the eyes of a big fanboy like myself, this movie was pristine.

god, the cast. i can’t talk enough about the cast. morena as vanessa hit the nail on the head with her portrayal. she kept up with ryan so very well and it never felt forced. never ever. her as the leading lady was incredible. the chemistry for those two was amazing, like. it makes a movie so much more special and endearing to me when you can see two actors on screen work so well with each other. i didn’t ever feel like they needed to be coached or stuff like that, not one bit. they meshed well together. they were perfect together. 

tj miller’s portrayal of weasel was phenomenal. though not exactly the weasel in the comic books, it was still a breath of fresh air. his role of comedic relief and supportive best friend to deadpool nearly killed me. if they made a separate movie of just tj miller as weasel, giving everyone shit and being the fucking hilarious fuck that he was, i’ll pay top fucking dollar. his role of support to deadpool was just right, hit all the right spots, i can’t.

leslie uggams as blind al should be protected at all costs. i don’t know how a classy broad like leslie had signed up to play a role in deadpool, but SHE SHOuLD BE PROTECTED. ryan talked about how he’d be behind the camera and giving leslie lines to say and just. how could you torture her like this!? she’s an old lady! also, she’s a lady who was amazing as blind al. didn’t take any of wade’s shit, was supportive of him and just was an all around bad ass characterization. and she could have shown more leg, c’mon wade.

the title villains, ed skrein and gina carano playing ajax and angel dust respectively…… I FUCKING HATED THEM. and that’s just fucking perfect. you hate what these two do to wade, how they messed him up, how they made him who he is. especially ajax. ed plays a sociopath so well, it’s awe inspiring. this guy needs to be in more things so i can actually associate him with not Hate. francis/ajax plays the part of both main antagonist and is pretty much a fusion of ajax from the comics and dr. killebrew, if you know the canon. he wasn’t just some throwaway typical villain either. he was a real badass and you just love to hate him. gina as angel dust was so damn good. i’ve been a fan of hers since her days as the top female fighter in MMA, and i’m so glad she found a home in acting. she is a badass through and through, and she wasn’t a one off character either. she wasn’t a sub boss in a video game that you forget about, that you just run through. also? mark me down as scared and horny, because she is as beautiful as she is a strong, scary woman. that’s my type.

next up are my two favorite characters from the movie besides the head cheese himself.  stefan kapičić as colossus and brianna hildrebrand as negasonic teenage warhead. their inclusion in this film made it 10x better and the movie wouldn’t be as half as good as it was without them. colossus being the lawful good in this movie, trying to recruit deadpool for the x-men and NTW playing the trainee and the foil to deadpool’s bs was amazing. colossus looks amazing from a CGI standpoint, finally looking like the brolic motherfucker who should have had more to do than just get ripped apart twice in the same movie. fucking dofp. he was actually russian, he mattered and he always should matter. NTW literally being a fucking angel and a little devil at the same time was amazing. how many times am i gonna say “not a throwaway,” because that’s just what everyone was. they weren’t one-off characters, like how some other franchises in the marvel universe were.

THEY FUCKING MATTERED IN THIS MOVIE. THEY MATTERED TO ME, THEIR NEW FANS, TO DEADPOOL, TO FUCKING EVERYONE.

and now, the piece de la resistance. the reason i’m here on this godforsaken website, the reason i have so many amazing and wonderful friends. the reason i won’t ever leave you guys, even though we all want me to go. ryan reynolds as deadpool. you know how you guys say you think of me when you watch this movie or whatever? i gotta say don’t. i’m a goddamn stephanie meyer when compared to ryan. there is no one on this earth who could have played deadpool in a movie like this. no one at all. i was always sorta….. respectable when it came to people fancasting others in this role, but now? y’all can kiss the fattest part of my ass. there is no one short of deadpool coming off the pages who could play that character. he has the humor, the passion, the chops to make this character so fleshed out and real. he put so much of himself, so much time into this movie. he understood what we wanted for deadpool. he spent more than a decade of his amazing life to give us the movie we deserved and, god we don’t deserve it. humans as a species don’t deserve how perfect this fucking movie was. the characterization for deadpool was so on point, it’s scary. you can see how much of wade has bled into ryan when you watch his interviews and how big a part wade is in his life, just like me. well, not like me because i’m a walmart compared to him being gucci. there was nothing else i could have asked for, nothing i wanted for. 

this movie has ruined all movies for me. this was the game changer it promised it was. this was the movies marvel needed to cleanse the palate. you may disagree with me, but hey, i don’t give a fuck. after years of MCU being top dog, maybe give respect where its due. watch it, support it, for the love of god. the wait was worth it, the pain of following me and dealing with my stupidity was worth it. i promise you guys, you won’t be disappointed. believe me on that.

no light pollution: an Ari & Dante fanmix

“and it seemed to me that Dante’s face was a map of the world. a world without any darkness. wow, a world without darkness. how beautiful was that?”

01. wild heart - bleachers
everything has changed / and now it’s only you that matters” //
“a part of me thought things would never be normal again.”

02. ribs - lorde
you’re the only friend i need” //
“until Dante, being with other people was the hardest thing in the world for me.”

03. who is in your heart now? - studio killers
have you ever found something / that you didn’t even know you were looking for? / an answer / though you didn’t hear the question” //
“all the answers had always been so close and yet i’d always fought them without even knowing it.”

04. edge - haim
i was always running, always hurt” //
“we all fight our private wars.”

05. iris - sleeping with sirens
well i don’t want the world to see me / ‘cause i don’t think that they’d understand//
“one summer night i feel asleep hoping the world would be different when i woke.”

06. this love  - taylor swift
been losing grip, oh, sinking ships / you showed up just in time” //
“i wanted to tell them that he had changed my life … And that somehow it felt like Dante had saved my life and not the other way around.”

07. giving me away - betty who
you should kiss me like you mean it again / ‘cause i don’t wanna be your friend//
“’try it again,’ i said. ‘kiss me.’
‘no.’
‘kiss me.’
‘no,’ and then he smiled. ‘you kiss me.’”

08. youth - troye sivan
my youth is yours / a truth so loud you can’t ignore” //
“Through all of youth I was searching for you without knowing what I was looking for. - W.S. Merwin”

09. there’s too much love - belle and sebastian
i’m brutal, honest and afraid of you” //
“’you. that’s what i’m afraid of. i’m afraid of you, Dante.’”

10. shine - years & years
i’ve got so many secrets to show” //
“’do you think, Ari, that love has anything to do with the secrets of the universe?’”

11. standing by - pentatonix
i will shout from the mountaintop / our hearts belong here” //
“how could i have ever been ashamed of loving Dante Quintana?”

[listen]

1D Hiatus: Day 61

* Liam posts three pictures on Instagram

* RBB’s Twitter account is deleted

* #LarriesDeserveRespect trends on Twitter

* Louis meets a fan in LA

* One Direction’s official account tweets the thank you video that was posted on 1D’s YouTube channel in November 2015

It’s Feb 12th, 2016.

I’ve been watching the French dub of Steven Universe here. We Need To Talk aired yesterday (uncensored!) and it contains my favourite bit of localisation.

When Greg asks Rose “How’d you end up with Harpo, Groucho, and Chico?” here instead he asks about “Athos, Porthos, and Aramis”.

Now I really need Which Gem Is Which Musketeer discussions to go with the Which Gem Is Which Marx Brother ones (IIRC the most common take back during that Steven Bomb was that Garnet was Harpo, Pearl was Groucho, and Amethyst was Chico?).

Unrelated, an interesting thing about their dub of Rose’s Scabbard is that this is the first one I’ve seen where Pearl’s hologram of Rose is actually dubbed by Rose’s voice actress, instead of just Pearl saying her lines. So in this case it becomes clear that the final exchange is

Rose: My Pearl…
Pearl: You’re wonderful.

as opposed to Rose saying both, which is a thing I’ve been wondering about for quite some time.

8

HAPPY PFAD ANNIVERSARY! @thisisnotpilipinx

Born in the Philippines 1992, moved to Moku o Keawe, aka Hawaiʻi island 1996, became an American citizen 2013, and proud of my Mama who sacrificed her comfort so that I can be well-off enough to post hot selfies on a smart phone lol.

I love my brown skin, my youthful glow, and being able to understand Tagalog, English, Hawaiian, and Hawaiian Creole English (aka Pidgin, recently an official language!). Also, I’m currently eating pinakbet with tons of shoyu lmao cheeeeeee 🐒🐒🐒🐒

2

I just needa brag about my baby baked potato and my curly fry. They make me wanna knock on strangers doors and scream looook at my dogs. We just went on a walk and bumba did absolutely amazing (with the help of some cheese) they got muddy feets and bumba fell and got a muddy bum.
He woommphed at horses asking what kind of dogs they were, they didn’t bark back and he was upset. Punky did so good at ignoring neighbor dogs I’m so so proud of them. I’m half way crying.