so yeah i made my own

  • sai: I still don't understand your bond with sasuke
  • naruto: this again?
  • naruto: look, it's simple
  • naruto: basically, he's my best friend, and the first person to really accept me for myself
  • naruto: we're also rivals because I've always wanted to be his equal, but he made me feel inferior, that bastard
  • naruto: I admire his determination, skills, strength, and the hidden kindness in his heart
  • naruto: I like the way his skin glows like the moon, the way his eyes are so clear and black, I can see my own reflection if I lean in close enough
  • naruto: his lips feel like velvet and taste sour, but also a little sweet
  • naruto: like tomatoes, I guess... huh...
  • sai: and how do you know what his lips taste like?
  • naruto: oh yeah, we kissed a few times
  • naruto: it was mostly on accident
  • sai: but you say you're friends?
  • naruto: no, no, we're more than just friends
  • sai: I see... that makes more sense
  • naruto: yeah, he's like a brother to me
  • naruto: a really infuriating, good-looking older brother
  • sai: I'm confused again
  • sai: so you're not in love with him?
  • naruto: don't be ridiculous- I just told you he's like a brother to me
  • naruto: you can't be in love with your brother
  • naruto: no matter how good-looking he is
  • naruto: that's weird
  • sai: and the rest of this is normal?
  • naruto: um... yeah
  • sai: I understand now
  • naruto: you do?
  • sai: yes, if I was sasuke, I would want to kill you too
  • naruto: sai, we have to work on your people skills

it gets harder to talk about but it gets easier to hold it in. to sit up prettier, to shut up louder, to pretend i don’t want you when all i want is to give in, to hold back the tears at the bar and release them once i get into my own bed, to pretend i want to exist. i want to exist. i want to exist. if i say it enough times, even i believe it. but suddenly, i’m a couple drinks in and i remember how unhappy i really am and everybody’s having fun around me but i can’t breathe anymore and my friend tells me i’m a wimp for never expressing my anger when the second i express it, there is always someone there to invalidate it. it’s getting easier to call myself crazy as an excuse for feeling, as if i’m not allowed to feel, as if this pressure build-up in my head is nothing but unequal brain chemistry, and everybody is so easy to brush off my emotions as being a product of mental illness instead of re-evaluating their own actions and wondering how in the world they could have made me feel this way.

so yeah, to say i’m mad is an understatement. to say i’m mad would even be lying. because it goes deeper than this feeling i experience once in a while, the real truth is that i’m sad and that sadness runs deep. i’m hurt. i feel like nobody even cares if they hurt me and the second i even suspect i am offending a stranger, i say sorry. but people run from me instead of apologize because their pride is more important than my feelings and it’s always been that way. i fall in love with anyone who shows me affection and people think it’s weird but when you’ve been deprived for so long from people who will listen, i don’t know, it’s hard. it’s still hard to believe that the second i start spilling my emotions, people talk over me. nobody wants to be with the person who brings up serious conversations at parties. nobody wants to be there for the girl who is always sad. everyone wants to pretend it doesn’t exist. and the more they pretend, the more i realize i’m getting good at this.

so i try to shut up until i can’t. like this time last year, i was showing up to your house to scream at you because i spent so much time holding everything in. but last night, i sent you fifteen text messages and deleted every one before i pressed send and i know no one’s gonna be there to congratulate me but maybe i can start being proud of myself because i don’t know how else i’m going to make this inadequate feeling end. you know, maybe i just have to keep trying things until i find something that works, maybe i just have to fly through boys until i find someone who isn’t gonna leave, maybe i just have to realize that the only person i’m ever going to truly have is me and i should stop holding people to impossible standards because they’re never going to live up to them and i’m always going to end up disappointed. nobody’s ever gonna care the way i want them to. it’s like i’m impossible to please. but god, i don’t know - i just wish for one second, someone would be excited about something because i am. be sad about something because i am. make me feel like my feelings affect others in some way. like they mean something. i’m growing so tired of the blank stares they give me.

i don’t know. maybe i’ve always asked for too much but i can’t remember the last time someone told me they loved me and if we’re being honest here: it’s devastating. i’m sad. i feel like i have nobody left. everyone likes me at first because i am so outgoing - i say what i’m thinking - but they leave soon after they realize that i am too much to deal with and they don’t really want to hear what’s in my head. they turn away because my insecurities make them nervous and who wants to deal with the girl who asks you if you hate them every five seconds? you say you don’t hate me but your body language tells me everything. i know i’m getting annoying but i can’t stop so i keep repeating it: i want to exist. i want to exist. i want to exist.

they say you’ve gotta let people in but the more i let people in, the more i regret it. i’m tired of silencing myself but it’s like the moments i’m silent are the only moments i’m not ruining everything.

—  I WANT TO EXIST. I WANT TO EXIST. I WANT TO EXIST. I’M NOT REALLY SAD. REMEMBER THIS.

anonymous asked:

"You dont want me" ladynoir

Ladybug sat at the top of the Eiffel Tower, her head in her hands, wondering how she could have possibly screwed things up SO badly. 

She heard the light footfall of her partner landing behind her. She couldn’t say she was surprised, he had never been one to leave her to stew in her own misery. 

“So…” he drawled, coming and sitting beside her, “that was an interesting broadcast today.” 

“It was a disaster,” she moaned, still not looking up at him, “I should just throw myself off this tower and put myself out of my misery.” 

“Oh come on, it’s not as bad as all that,” Chat said, patting her awkwardly on the back. 

She turned and glared at him. “It was a live stream, Chat! LIVE! It’s out there. Right now!” 

“True,” he conceded, nodding his head, “but it’s not like you said anything horrible. It was kinda cute actually.” 

“You don’t understand,” she moaned, slumping over so until she was curled up in his lap, “I’ve ruined everything! What sort of an idiot starts babbling about their crush on a live broadcast.” 

“Well, apparently you,” Chat said with a light laugh, cautiously reaching forward to play with the ends of her hair, “and about half of the rest of the known world. It could be a lot worse buginette.” 

“Do you think there is a chance he didn’t see it?” she asked hopefully, looking up at her partner’s thoughtful expression. 

He gave her a pitying smile. “I think you’re pretty much out of luck their bugaboo. You already have a ship name and everything. It’s trending on twitter.” 

“Ugh, that’s terrible,” she groaned, curling up tighter and burying her face against his leg. 

“I don’t know,” Chat teased, “I thought Ladrien had kind of a nice ring to it.” 

“This can’t be happening,” she moaned. 

“Hey, come on. What’s this really about? Is it really going to be so awful for the guy to know you like him? He might be flattered.” 

“It’s not that,” Ladybug said softly, “I mean, it’s MORE than that. I haven’t even told him I liked him- as myself, my not Ladybug self I mean. And now… let’s say he does feel flattered? That just means I have made myself my own competition! And it’s not like I can just go up to him and be like: Hey, by the way I’m Ladybug and, as you already know, I’m totally in love with you! Want to date me now?” 

“Oh god,” Chat said with a sudden sense of horror, “there are going to be so many desperate fangirls trying to do that.” 

“I didn’t even think about that! If he didn’t before he’s definitely going to hate me now. I might be the only person in the world who can simultaneously confess to her crush and make it harder for him to notice me!”  

“You really are one of a kind there bugaboo,” Chat said giving her another reassuring pat on the shoulder. 

“And what if this puts him in danger? I mean I might as well have stamped a butterfly tattoo across his back saying property of Ladybug, please exchange for one miraculous!” 

“Please don’t do that. I am told that models need to be very particular about what they put on their skin.” 

“It’s not funny. What if I honestly made him a target?”

“Hey,” Chat said “I promise you, if anything happens I will be the first person on the scene.” 

“Thanks,” she said gratefully, reaching up and catching his hand in her own.

“So, you’re in love with the model boy,” Chat said softly, rubbing his thumb absently against the back of her hand, “gotta say I didn’t see that one coming.” 
“Yeah well, it’s not like it really matters anymore,” she sighed, “it’s not like it would ever happen.” 

He scoffed at her, rolling his eyes theatrically to show his clear contempt for her pessimism. “So tell me My Lady,” he asked shifting slightly so that he could look down at her with a playful smile, “what is it that you see in this guy anyways?” 

“Wouldn’t you like to know.” 

“You don’t want me, so clearly you aren’t after the guy for his looks,” Chat said wiggling his eyebrows flirtatiously. 

“No,” Ladybug laughed, “although they don’t hurt.” 

“Why My Lady, was that you finally admitting that you find me attractive?” 

“You’ve always been attractive and you know it,” she said reaching up and flicking his bell. “As you can see I’ve just had my attentions elsewhere.” 

“Oh so this is a long standing attachment then? How long have you been dreaming of being M’Lady Agreste?” he teased poking her lightly on the nose. 

“Almost from the first day I met him. It will be two years next week,” she said softly. 

“The start of school,” Chat murmured, “you know him then?” 

“yeah,” she admitted reaching blindly around to catch his other hand and pull him to her like a security blanket. “We were in the same class in college and we still have a few classes together now. Plus our friends are dating so we hang out a lot.” 

“You two are close then,” Chat said a little breathlessly, “that… well that certainly clears things up.” 
“Yeah,” Ladybug said, “it’s not just some creepy celebrity crush. I mean, it kind of was that too. I have like 2 dozen photos of him plastered on my wall that I used to practice talking to because for the longest time I could barely string a sentence together around him, it was kind of embarrassing. I got over it eventually, but by that point I didn’t really have the heart to take the pictures down.” 

Chat gave her a warm smile. “I can see it now, you stuttering and tripping and shooting the poor confused boy adorable awkward smiles before running off in the opposite direction.” 

“Shut up,” Ladybug said but she couldn’t help grinning at her partners soft tone and fond smile. “I got better.” 

“I know.” He raised one of her hands to his lips and gave her a delicate kiss. “So you still haven’t told me what you see in this guy,” he challenged, “If I am getting demoted to your rebound choice I deserve to know what I am up against,” he said slyly. 

“He’s kind,” Ladybug smiled, filling with warmth as she thought about her love. “He always wants to see the best in people,and he… he is just good, you know? The kind of goodness that doesn’t come from ignorance or being sheltered, but that has seen pain and and heartache and loss and yet still chooses to be good. 

“That is high praise indeed My Lady.” 

“You aren’t going to make fun of me for this?” 

“No My Lady. If anything I am going to love you more for it.” 

She gave him another grateful smile before sitting up. The sun had begun to set and she knew she should be getting home. She probably had a dozen of so missed calls from Alya waiting for her. 

“Well who knows,” she said attempting to be flippant. “Maybe he’ll finally just reject me and I will change my mind about you Kitty.” 

“Wouldn’t that be a twist,” Chat laughed climbing to his feet and offering her his hand to help her up as well. 

“It would probably be for the best,” she sighed. “It’s not like we can be together. Not with Hawkmoth still on the loose. There is too much at stake. And I don’t know if I could bear having to hide my identity in a relationship.” 

Chat grinned again. “You are very wise My Lady.” 

“Mostly I am just telling myself that so I can feel better,” she admitted and was rewarded with a loud melodious laugh. 

“You know,” he said, eyes twinkling “you are probably right. Clandestine meetings, midnight makeout sessions, it’s probably better to hold out for the real thing.” 

“Yeah.” 

“Besides, I hate to break it to you My Lady but I have a sinking feeling that #Ladrien is not to be.” 

“And why is that Kitty?” 

“Well,” Chat said looking out at the sunset, “not to be the bearer of bad news but I have it on very good authority that your lover is very much spoken for.” 

“oh?” Ladybug said trying not to let her disappointment show. 

“Yes, completely and hopelessly in love. Someone at his school in fact.” 

“And who is this mystery girl?” she asked. 

“It’s right on the tip of my tongue,” Chat said his eyes glittering with something she couldn’t quite name, “it will come to me. I’ll have to tell you next time I see you.” 

“Well thanks for the heads up,” she said leaning over to give him a kiss on the cheek, “and thanks for cheering me up.” 

“Always My Lady. I should probably get heading home myself.” he pulled out his staff and and extended it. 

“Oh,” he said, shooting her a final grin as prepared to depart, “I do remember one thing.”
“And what’s that?” 

“The mystery girl, I knew there was something about her that I found particularly delectable.” 

“And what is that?” 

“Her parent’s own a bakery.”  

This photo might not seem like much but there is a lot here.

Let’s start with, I’m a jeweler. I got my start with metalsmithing almost 20 years ago. It’s my passion. My partner doesn’t have this background.

We’ve been married for almost 11 years and together for 15. We’ve been through a lot of stuff together.

One of those things is me coming to terms with my sexuality. Some days I think I’m squarely demisexual, some days it is much more solidly ace. I’m still not entirely sure. But I’m somewhere on that spectrum. This is not a thing that was known before we got married. But we’re still here, still together.

A few weeks back my partner started asking questions about how to forge a ring. I taught them how to hammer and anneal copper. How to shape it without stretching it too much. How to polish and clean everything up.

During this they got the size for my middle finger. I figured ok, if you’re going to make a first ring you need to have a target. That’s a normal thing, I didn’t particularly think on the significance.

Yesterday they had me help them through our nano-ceramic plating process as they took the copper ring they had made to fit my middle finger and plated it with black ceramic.

I spent the last couple weeks teaching my sweetie the basics of jewelry making so that last night they could gift me with an ace ring that they made me with thier own two hands.

So yeah, that photo doesn’t look like much but it means everything.

-Adrian (@we-are-valid & @optimysticals)

Top 10 moments when ACOMAF shattered my heart in the best way possible

Okay, now that I’ve spent my whole week just living and breathing about ACOMAF… re-reading ACOMAF… and just thinking about it obsessively and telling ALL my friends about it… I feel like now it is a good time to post this. I’m going to post my top 10 moments in ACOMAF where MY HEART BROKE. And I hope you guys can agree–because this fandom is one soul, and we ride and die together.  

10. When Feyre comforts Rhysand after waking him up from his nightmare.

Like first of all, OW. It just breaks my heart over and over to think about what Amarantha did to Rhys, and what scars it left behind. 

But… what broke my heart more was this:

“But–but how many nights had I wanted someone to do the same for me?” 

AND I’M JUST LIKE FEYRE SUFFERED ALONE IN THE SPRING COURT 

Because some stupid High Lord of the Spring Court just pretended to be asleep whenever she vomited her guts out, and pretended everything was all fine and dandy. You claim to love her, and yet, you let this happen. tamlin u shit bag

9. Lucien and Feyre reunion after Feyre goes to the Night Court. 

You gave up on me.” 

Look, guys, I know Lucien is not a bad person. Deep down, he is a good, troubled person who has a lot of his own scars, and I know that he does consider Feyre to be his friend and he does care about her. But he also chooses to yield to Tamlin at the end of everything. He does fight for her, but he doesn’t fight enough against Tamlin. Now, this could be because Tamlin does instill a lot of fear in Lucien–which, if it’s true, it is not a healthy friendship, even if Tam is Lucien’s High Lord. But it makes me wonder, you know. Where is our fiery Lucien, who once spat at Tamlin’s feet? I really do hope that Elain will help him change for the better. Or that he comes to this realization from himself. Man, I love Lucien, but he’s going to have to do a lot more to redeem himself. 

Because, see, even Rhys thinks that Lucien would’ve stepped in.

And this breaks Feyre’s heart, that her friend wouldn’t do this for her. And she would’ve fought for Lucien until the end, no doubt about. 

“I thought so, too” HA HA HA LET ME LIE IN MY OWN PUDDLE OF TEARS

8. The scars that remain with Rhys because of Amarantha. 

The next scene that broke my heart happens during the sexytimes between Feyre and Rhys.

Okay, just re-reading this scene is making me really emotional. So I don’t know if I’m going to be coherent enough to say this. But like, guys. I think this scene is important–and heartbreaking at the same time–because it’s a moment where Rhysand’s scars are acknowledged. Again, it is so rare in YA fiction to see a male character who has been sexually abused, and Sarah explores the scars that remain within Rhysand. And it’s also important because he’s also able to overcome these scars, and find happiness even after the darkest of times.

7. How Rhysand is treated in Velaris vs. Under the Mountain

Okay, so I like how 8 and 7 relate to each other. 

What struck me about this scene was: “no one whispered about him or spat on him or stroked him as they had Under the Mountain”

What really breaks my heart here is that it’s not just Amarantha that violated Rhys. Others did it too, because Amarantha did it, because Rhys was Amarantha’s whore, and therefore, her property. 

And this makes me really sick to my stomach. And it breaks my heart. fuck

6. Feyre realizing how sad she is at the Spring Court before her wedding. 

THIS PHYSICALLY HURTS

my poor baby Feyre 

I spent a good portion of time during the beginning of the novel wanting to wrap her in a warm blanket, hug her, and tell her it’s okay. 

And Tamlin, CAPTAIN OBLIVIOUS, is able to laugh freely. I’m gonna fight him

Even Rhys in Chapter 11 goes: “Months and months, and you’re still a ghost. Does no one there ask what the hell is happening? Does your High Lord simply not care?” (Shall we count this as like an honourable mention moment for when my heart broke into a million pieces… again) 

ha ha ha ha let me DIE my heart can’t take this 

5. Rhysand asks Feyre about her birthday. 

This isn’t a sad scene, but it still moved me and broke my heart because you can obviously tell how much Rhys loves Feyre.

FEYRE’S BIRTHDAY IS THE WINTER SOLSTICE

THE LONGEST NIGHT OF THE YEAR 

“YOU WERE TRULY BORN ON THE WINTER SOLSTICE?” 

YES RHYS MY SMOL SON YOUR MATE WAS BORN ON THE LONGEST NIGHT OF THE YEAR YES YOU TRULY BELONG TOGETHER

But also, like. Rhys seems genuinely sad that Feyre did not celebrate her birthday. Do I foresee belated birthday gift/party in ACOTAR 3? Because yes I will sell my soul for this 

4. Feyre walking away from Rhysand after learning about the mating bond

Okay, no, I totally understand why Feyre is angry enough that she wants some time alone away from Rhysand once she learns from the Suriel that they’re mates. I’ve seen people hating on her for it… but c’mon. Really? You don’t think you’d be angry? Angry enough to walk away? I mean I’d want my own space to think too

But yeah it still broke my heart because Rhysand just calls after her… injured and weakened… ahaha…..ha…. why…

Now we’re rolling into the final 3… and honestly, these broke my heart the most and made me cry. I still want to weep when I think about them. 

3. Rhysand noticing Feyre’s weight loss 

He cares so much about her. *UGLY WAILING* *falls to the floor*

And he makes sure she eats properly. And wants to have breakfast with her. 

RHYSAND YOU PRECIOUS SOUL

cue ugly sobbing, with the snot and everything 

rhysand calling tam out on his shitty behaviour

2. Cassian and Feyre training 

This is still one of my favourite scenes, and I … just. The whole scene leading up to it is an emotional roller coaster–Cassian saying that he’s there for Feyre if she wants to talk about leaving the Spring Court, the whole “I’m fine” thing, and how Feyre just realizes she did everything for Tamlin… and he just…. left her to suffer alone.

He’s ready to take the blow. 

CASSIAN WOULD TAKE THE BLOW. 

BECAUSE HE CARES ABOUT FEYRE AND WANTS TO HELP HER COPE. 

BECAUSE HE UNDERSTANDS.

Rhys is precious, Cassian is precious….. the whole Night Court squad is precious. I just love them so muchhhhhhh. 

And now. .  . okay. 

The final scene had me in full blown tears. 

1. Amren x Feyre 

SHE ASKS RHYS THIS LIKE 3 TIMES

SHE DEMANDS TO KNOW WHERE FEYRE IS 

AND AND AND AMREN ISN’T ALWAYS VOCAL ABOUT HER FEELINGS AND SHE’S SCARY AND SHE’S VICIOUS

BUT SHE LOVES FEYRE

I JUST

IT’S THE MOMENT YOU REALIZE HOW MUCH AMREN–AND THE REST OF THE COURT–ALSO LOVE FEYRE, A FELLOW DREAMER 

I’M DEAD 

D E A D 

LOWER ME TO THE GROUND 

This post also made me very emotional again. Thanks for reading. And if you know want to discuss ACOMAF with me, and the scenes that broke your heart (because there are like 10 million more)… feel free to shoot me a message. 

I’m gonna go read ACOMAF some more and cry by e 

Fanon Langst is so…………. like, I understand that everyone experiences low self-esteem and struggles with their worth in different ways, but fanon Langst is really bad lmao. It’s so one note to me? And a lot of the time it feels like just an excuse to beat on Lance.

If you want your blog to be filled with pics of Lance crying, go ahead. But it is disturbing how Big this trend of ‘Lance being hurt, Lance crying, Lance dying’ is in this fandom. It’s…. weird that I can go into the tag, either here or on ao3, and know with 100% certainty that I’ll see something about Lance getting hurt/killed.

Many people have been quick to point out that all this excessive Langst content ties into racism. And I won’t lie, I agree with them. Lance is a confirmed brown, Cuban, character of color. And there is a history of brown lives being less valued than white lives- a history that is in fact still happening now. It’s important to remember and acknowledge that fact, and therefore reexamine Langst content with a more critical eye.

HOWEVER, I also understand that Langst is a popular thing because Lance is relatable to the audience. And because Lance is so relatable, it’s easy to project on him. But I gotta………. look, I’m not a psychologist or a therapist, but to every person reading this post- if you treat Lance as a sort of vehicle for every negative thought or fantasy you’ve ever had for yourself, you need to take a step back and just…. look at what you’re doing. Because I did this sort of thing when I was younger, too. I took my favorite characters, the ones I related to most, and I beat them to all hell and made them wish they were dead. And looking back on it now, I’m alarmed by how many Warning Signs there were.

Making angsty content of your faves is fun, but not to the extent that you use them as punching bag stand ins for your own issues. I’ve realized now that I wailed on my favorite characters because I wanted to hurt myself. It wasn’t a healthy way to cope then, and it’s taken me a long time to recover from that mindset.

So yeah. Maybe it’s time we start shifting away from hurting Lance.

If I could be just a dad

“I am not just a mom,” Mary said, trying to hold back her frustration but she was failing, “And you are not a child.”

“I never was.” Dean quickly responded with sadness in his voice, “I gave up knowing my own daughter so that she could be a child. Do you know wha-what I’d do if I could be just a dad? To know my own kid? You have that chance and your-” Dean stopped himself before he got too worked up. “So between us and them-”

“It’s not like that.” Mary interrupted her oldest son.

“Yeah Mary, it is.” Dean cut in with a serious face which Mary returned, however it was easy to see that Dean’s words had hurt her. “And you made your choice. So there’s the door.” Dean finished, pointing up towards the door as his emotions nearly broke through. He walked away, unable to be in the same room as his mother anymore.

Sam moved out of his seat to follow Dean, however Mary called to him, “Sam-” She said.

Sam looked up at his mother with tears in his eyes, “You should go.” He told her. 

“Dean has a daughter?” She asked, drawing Sam’s attention back into the conversation.

Sam simply nodded his head, thinking of you caused more emotions to rise within him, bringing more tears to his eyes. “Yeah, Y/N, she-she’s five.” Sam replied thickly with emotion.

“And why doesn’t he see her?” Mary questioned.

Sam looked back at his mother with unbelieving eyes, “This life that we live, Dean wanted better for her; he wanted her to be a child. So we stay away.”
Mary slowly nodded her head as she took in her youngest child’s words, “You really should go.” Sam repeated himself,

“And never mention Y/N again.”

4

Hey guys! So I’ve been working on this project for over a month, and its finally done!

I’ve created my own Fullmetal Alchemist coloring book!

This is an original handmade book featuring illustrations of Ed & Al and the whole gang! (yeah the book quality’s not sooo great sorry -__-)

Choose from 15 drawings to color on high quality paper! I tried to include a variety of characters and settings

The price of the book is 23$ plus add. shipping

Currently there are only 15 books made, so its first come first served (if there a demand for more, i’ll consider making a second batch, but its a lot of work)

You can purchase the book on my ebay account >>> HERE <<<

Please consider buying or spreading the word because I put a looot of work into this project!

Also note that FMA does not belong to me, but these are original drawings of mine based on the series.

Please feel free to message me with questions and thank you so much to anyone interested!

Horny teenagers - Carl Grimes

HEY GUYS so I really wanted to write a smut but there is no plot so whatever is just smut and I wanted to write something like the last scene of 7x01 of TWD and I did it! I hope you like it, and remember English is not my first language and this is my first TWD smut

Warnings: smut and language

Words: 2599

Gif is obviously not mine ​

The past few hours in watch duty had been kind of a torture for me. I’ve been trying to control this since I’ve learned what it actually is. We grew up together, we’ve seen a lot of nasty things together and suddenly we were at the age of awkwardness and hormones and, apparently, mine decided to show up. I’ve been trying to convince myself that he would never agree with this and even if he did it wasn’t a good idea. It would do us no good. Well an orgasm would, though. ​

Here in Alexandria they have lots of books so I’ve been reading a lot, especially about biology – my favorite class in school – and recently I read about menstrual cycle and sexuality, there is this period when women are ready to get pregnant and that’s when you only want sex. For the past few months I’ve been trying to convince myself that I just want Carl because of this annoying period and he’s the only interesting boy around. ​

Sometimes I have this feeling that our friendship has changed in a certain way. I think it’s because of the hormones, but we’re touchier and even occasionally flirty. He has this habit of holding the back of my neck whenever we hug each other, or when I’m mad at something he rubs my shoulder or my back, he plays with my hair brushing his long and cold fingers against my ears and neck and sometimes he whispers something to me and I can’t stand that. The hot breath, that amazing voice, the way he says my name. Oh, man! I was losing it. ​

I felt ridiculous every time Carl popped in my head or whenever I decided to touch myself he would always wind up in my dirty little thoughts.

​“(Y/N), you can go. It’s my shift now.” I hear Spencer say.

​“Okay, thanks.”

​“Oh and uh… Carol asked me to tell you she’s taking lunch to Rick’s place.” ​

I nodded and left. Great, I’m having one of those crazy moments and I’m heading straight to the danger. You can do this. I took a deep breath and knocked. I heard laughs from inside and that made me happy because we were doing fine here, we were adapting at last. ​

Carl opened the door while holding Judith and gave me a smile.

​“Come in, (Y/N)” Oh please Carl not today don’t say my name. ​

The smell of whatever Carol cooked was amazing and she was sitting next to Daryl and they were gazing each other with such warmth, in a cozy and even romantic way. I wanted them to be together but right now it just made me want to turn around and look in Carl’s eye. ​

We sat down, ate and talked about the most random things. We talked about things we did before the apocalypse, we laughed at things that happened to us and we just enjoyed each other’s company. Don’t think that’s gonna happen again in anytime soon tough. ​

Then I felt a hand touch my thigh lightly, I closed my eyes trying to keep it together because from where it was coming it had to be Carl’s. I looked at him and he was still paying attention to Glenn, who was telling something very newsworthy because Carl and a few other people in the table were concentrated. He caressed my thigh going down my knee and squeezed a bit and took his hand off. Like doing that was only a reflex, part of a routine. I don’t know if he hadn’t noticed or if he was just pretending to make me confuse. ​

Later in the same day he did that terrible/delicious massage in my sore shoulders. We offered to wash the dishes, so after lunch everybody went back to their normal activities, and when we were done I made a stupid joke about the amount of plates and forks and sighed. He must’ve gotten that as a complaint because he said “relax” and then came behind the chair I was sitting and pushed my hair aside. His hands were soft and steady, it felt great but I couldn’t let him carry on with this. I placed my hands on top of his and turned my head around. ​

“Does it bother you?” If he only knew what it actually does to me.

​“It’s not that. I just – I should probably get going.” I stood up and he held my arm. I don’t know why, honestly I do know, but when he did that I instantly approached him, looking at his lips. I was unsure if I wanted him to notice or not. If I wanted him to do something about it or just ignore the fact that I was staring at his lips wanting them so badly I couldn’t take my eyes off of them.

​“Stay. We can go upstairs and read comics if you like.” ​

I can’t, not anymore. “I don’t wanna read comics, Carl.” I tried my best to make the sentence self explanatory and bit my lip. ​

“Do you – uh, wanna go upstairs then?” He clearly wasn’t expecting my reaction but he didn’t step back. ​

“Yes. Yes, I do.” ​

He was obviously holding a grin but I didn’t care. He grabbed my hand and led me to his room. The walk was kind of awkward and very silent. When we finally got to his room he closed the door and came towards me. He cupped my face and kissed me tenderly, he was nervous, I could tell. I placed one hand in his chest and the other one in his hair, it was so soft. The kiss was a little sloppy because this was our first kiss ever, I guess. It was amazing though, I just wasn’t sure of what to do so I followed my gut and I believe so did he. ​

He lowered his hands to my waist and gripped it. I let out a needy sigh and I feel my cheeks hot in embarrassment. I took the hem of his shirt in my hands and lift it, breaking the kiss. ​

“Are you sure about this?” ​

“Yeah.” ​

I ripped his shirt off and then my own. Carl looked at my breasts like they were a masterpiece, probably because he had never seen breasts before but it made me feel great anyways. I searched for his lips once again and this time he was more confident so his tongue was more demanding. He caressed my back lightly with the tip of his fingers making me shiver. I pull him closer to get some friction and I finally feel his boner and this time I moan in both pleasure and excitement. ​

Carl lays me down on the bed and kneels between my legs. He kissed my lower abdomen and came up, kissing my breasts still covered by the bra and my collarbone. When he got to my neck he gave me a hickey, probably wanting to mark me down as his and that turned me on so much I wanted to mark him too. He unclasped my bra and pulled it out so fast I didn’t even see what happened to it. Now he was finally looking to my breasts and he blinked a couple of times and said “Is it okay if I…?” ​

"Go for it.” ​

He grinned and caught one of them in his hand and massaged it. I had no idea that I was going to like Carl sucking my breast so much, when I felt his mouth on my nipple I was already in heaven, but when he sucked it was something else entirely. I wasn’t able to restrain my moans this time, they were a little loud. ​

Desperate for a kiss I pulled his hair to bring his head up, he moaned this time and I smiled in the kiss. I took off his belt and once I moved to the zipper his hand shakes a little while I brushed my hand in his arousal more than the necessary to open a zipper on purpose. Carl helped me with the jeans, picked a little package – probably a condom – and looked back at me only in his underwear and I couldn’t help but to look. I must’ve done something pretty greedy and ridiculously embarrassing because he had a huge smirk in his face. ​

"Shut up.” I said and the smirk became wider. ​

He took my shorts off and just stood there staring at me like I was his muse or something. I can’t say that I didn’t like it because I loved it but I felt a little uncomfortable. I am confident but suddenly realization of what we were doing and how I was in front of him hit me and I blushed. That didn’t stop me though, my cheeks were burning but so was the wetness between my thighs and I thought that was more important so I wiggled my hips against Carl’s to wake him up and it worked out exactly like I was expecting. ​

Carl touched the waistband of my underwear and looked at me again asking permission, I guess. Then I lifted my butt of the mattress so he could take the underwear easily and he did. ​

Carl gazed at my entire body and sighed and mumbled to himself “Finally we’re doing this.” ​

I felt butterflies in my belly and I smile, like an innocent virgin girl – which I am. I wasn’t the only one after all. ​

Carl did a trail of kisses from my neck to my lips and rubbed his thumb against my folds; I moaned and rolled my hips against his hand wanting more of that new contact. He smiled in the kiss, and I loved it. Actually I was loving every single moment of it. Carl slipped a finger inside me and curled it and took it off. Then he tried again, this time with two fingers. “Ah, Carl…” I groaned and mellow. My hands were gripping his shoulders for balance or control, I’m not sure, I just thought that if I let go I would fall. His hand were all over me making me shiver, his kisses weren’t sloppy anymore, and knowing that he wanted this too just made me feel better, maybe wetter too but that’s another case and he won’t be hearing about it. ​

He positioned himself to my entrance and gave me the look again, I nodded biting my bottom lip. Carl grabbed my thighs and spread them. He glanced to my core and licked his lips. That was so delicious to watch, it was kind of porn but it turned me on so much. He picked the condom and put it on. He pulled me down and I felt his tip in my entrance and rolled my hips to it. I wanted him to know how badly I wanted this, how horny he made me. ​

"Tell me if it hurts too much, okay?” So thoughtful, so gorgeous. I closed my eyes and nodded. Then I felt it inside me and I couldn’t hold back the almost musical moan. It feels so good, so right. He kept going slowly and suddenly I started to feel this strange ardency and I let out a painful moan, it wasn’t exactly hurting but the surprise and the little burning sensation were enough to make Carl gaze at me worried. ​

"It’s okay, you can carry on. Just keep the pace. I’ll be fine.” ​

He pushed a bit more and the feeling was still there but I tried to ignore it and Carl helped me a lot with that. His thumb came back to my clit, just up and down movements and he kissed me passionately while he pushed more. I was feeling the ardency but it didn’t matter because Carl was touching me so much, giving me so much, paying so much attention to me I couldn’t even process the pain. Carl was all over me, literally. In my mind, in my body, everywhere. ​

Once he was completely inside me with his eye closed and he sighed, he stopped and looked right in my eyes, he didn’t take his hand off my clit. The bad sensation was almost gone by now. “Are you okay?” ​

I grinned at him “Never better.” ​

He smirked and pulled it back slowly. It was a torture for him I could see in his eye all the effort he was putting into this, the self control and I smiled like an idiot. His thrusts were still slow and I think he was shaking a little. Just a little but he was. ​

I wasn’t completely comfortable yet but I was ready for this and his pace was making me impatient, I get that he was being nice and I love him for it but he could make this good for himself. So I rolled my hips a bit so he would understand that it was okay for him to go faster and maybe, just maybe, harder. ​

He picked up a good pace. It was faster but not too fast yet and it was so intense, it could be only me although his expression was showing that he was loving it as much as I was. His thrusts were getting faster and I was getting there, finally I was taking it all. This was so good, the pleasure was so intense and overwhelming. His sweaty body and his heavy sighs were giving it the best background ever. I think I’ve never seen such a sight. I let out a loud and full of joy and pleasure moan. He smirked at me because this was likely the most inappropriate moan ever. ​

I couldn’t stop them now, they just kept coming loud and awkward and hot, apparently. I decided to do something different for a change, I rolled my hips and caressed my body going down my clit and touched it for him to see it. ​

"Fuck, (Y/N)! That’s so hot.” ​

I smiled widely and arched my back feeling a delicious ache in my lower abdomen and feeling like there was not enough air in my lungs and the strength was leaving my body and I needed desperately to grip something – that something were Carl’s shoulders again – then I felt like I was falling apart and pleasure and relief hitting me like a truck. ​

"Oh God, Carl!” That was almost a scream, thank God we were alone in the house. ​

My orgasm show was enough to bring Carl his own, and again was an amazing scene to watch. He moaned loudly and let his elbows clench a little, falling on top of me. He was breathing heavily and he was all sweaty and that was so hot. I felt his heart beating so fast in his chest and I grinned satisfied. He threw himself in the bed and took a deep breath. ​

He seemed so tired but he was smiling so hard it was creepy. Us smiling wasn’t something easy to see. That made me even happier because I made him smile, I was smiling, we were satisfied and that’s all we need. ​

"That was fucking awesome!” ​I laughed at his excitement. I turned to face him and his eye was piercing. He was so handsome I couldn’t think properly sometimes, like now.

​“We can do this again sometime, if you want to.” I said a little scared but mostly confident that he would want to. ​

"Can ‘sometime’ be now?” he said with a smug smirk on his face and I laughed again. ​

"Okay, loverboy, just give me a few minutes and we’re back on.”

Originally posted by journeyslegend

We're Here

It was the lack of noise that really got to Lance more then anything.
The emptyness completely void of any sound that he didn’t create himself.
The night was the worse.
While everyone else was fast asleep and Lance was left listening to the white noise that filled his ears.
He had never been in such silence. Back home there was always chattering, or the foot steps.
Even late at night there was the constant soothing sound of the ocean crashing against the rocks outside his bedroom window. A ever preasent companion on long sleepless nights.
Even at the Garrison there had been Hunks loud snoring to fill the void.
But now…
There was nothing.
Lance lost track of how many sleepless nights he spent laying in the common room staring at the unfamiliar constellations that passed above him.
The silence was so deafening.
So absolute.
That the small sound of bare feet moving towards him sounded like a herd of elephants.
Lance bolted up into a sitting position coming face to face with a half asleep Keith.
“I thought you were asleep…” Keith looked down drawing Lance’s attention to the blue blanket in his arms.
“Nah… just thinking.” Lance shrugged staring at the blanket rather then Keith’s bed head. “What about you?”
Keith dumped the blanket on Lance’s knee and sat down on the couch next to him, Lance refusing to move to give him more space.
“Could t sleep, thought I would get something to drink but when I saw you I figured I would grab your blanket.”
“My hero.” Lance joked lying back again tapping the space next to him.
Keith took the hint and joined the blue paladin pulling the blanket over the two of them.
“Do you miss earth?” Lance asked suddenly.
Keith turned to look at him, Lance continued to stare up through the skylight at the stars. “No not really. I never had anything to hold me there. Here’s different, I have you and the others. The family I never had.”
Lance made a quiet humming noise.
“I know you do. So you don’t have to pretend not to.”
“I’m not pretending. I do miss my family but I miss the sound more then anything.” Lance admitted.
“Sound?” Keith questioned pretending not to notice as Lance brushed his fingers against his hand.
“Yeah, it’s too quiet around here. I mean I’ve never been somewhere that wasn’t filled with people. With noise… like the ocean.”
Keith took Lance’s hand in his own giving it a reassuring squeeze.
“You’ll get back someday I promise.”
The two lay there in a comfortable silence for a few minutes before Lance broke it.
“Hey Keith?”
“Yeah Lance?” He mumbled nearly asleep.
“When we get back to earth. Will you come to the ocean with me?”
Keith never answered simply nodding and pulling Lance closer to his in a hug.
———————————–
Keith struggled under the weight of the limp Blue paladin in his arms.
The final battle had been long and bloody but in the end they came out victorious, but still with casualties.
Blue Lions had been shot out of the air and all Keith could do was follow in time to see her crash into the sand.
Keith ran to the cock pit and felt his heart break at the sight.
Lance was slumped over the control panel with so much blood pooling beneath him that the blue details of his armour were lost beneath.
His breathing was weak and wet spraying even more blood with every laboured gasp he took.
Keith picked him up and lay him down trying to stop the endless bleeding.
It there was nothing he could do.
Lance was going to die.
Keith didn’t cry, he couldn’t not yet. He had a promise to keep.
Ignoring his own injuries Keith picked up the blue paladin and carried him outside stumbling in the sand.
He could see it, just a little away. The ocean.
Keith kept walking and walking making slow process over the sandy terrain.
Finally he was there at the shore, sinking to his knees and laying Lance down in the wet sand.
The water washed away the blood still seeping from his wounds, so that for a single moment Keith could pretend Lance was only sleeping and would open those beautiful eyes of his and see the sky.
“L-look Lance.” Keith’s voice broke with emotion as the tears began to fall.
“We’re here…”

—————————————- https://mocking-bird-mal.tumblr.com/post/160196468183/look-at-my-shit-comic-lines-this-took-forever-i Original comic this was based off
Revelations & Confessions

AN: Hours later and I’m still reeling from that episode. it was so raw and emotional. Truthful. This is my attempt to process that.

(Set somewhere post 5x17)

Oliver sat on the cot in front of her, arms supporting his weight on his knees, head hung low. He knew she was there, he always did. Still, he refused to look up at her, to meet her gaze.

It had been this way for weeks. He’d shut himself off, emotionally, physically, much more that he had ever done before, in the times she’d known him. Then, he would always glance up, make sure that she knew that she mattered to him, in some small way.

Now, he stiller than a statue, frozen in misery.

“Oliver.” Felicity whispered, stepping towards him. Still he refused to move.

Cautiously, she approached him, her heels sounding a knell with each stiletto strike. As though every step was another scar on his skin. She settled on the floor in front of him, kneeling at his feet. This way, she could peer up at him, find his eyes and see what he was thinking.

If she knew what the wound was, she could heal him. It was deep, and unseen, but had broken Oliver to the point that he didn’t spring back by his own power or the encouragement of her or John.

Still, he didn’t move. He gave the illusion that she wasn’t really there, that perhaps she was an illusion of his mind. An echo of his mistakes.

Felicity reached out and grasped his hands, his fingers between her palms. They were cold, dry and brittle, smooth as a stone. Ridges of calluses mapped a pattern of hardship and toil, orators of his heroic acts. The same scars that revealed the instrument of darkness he held tightly to.

The instant her hands made contact with his, he shuddered, pulling away. Quickly, she reclaimed her grip.

“Don’t.” He whispered, voice hoarse from disuse.

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Gullruten 2017 Red Carpet - Henrik og Tarjei interview translation

-Interviewer: how is it to be here today?

-Tarjei: it is exciting! 

-Henrik: very cozy (koselig)

-Interviewer: how has it been portraying Isak and Even?

-Tarjei: very fun, certainly the most entertaining character i have ever portrayed

(Henrik agres)

-Interviewer: how has it been to be in a tv-series, that people care imensely about, and that has received attention not only in Norway but also worldwide?

-Henrik: Like, you cannot care too much, because what you do on screen is portraying a character. You certainly feel that people care about what we do otherwise, you know. 

-Interviewer: I really care, i am very curious! 

-Henrik: I know (laughs)

-Interviewer: Tarjei you are one of the skam stars who aren’t on social media, and is more of a private type. How has it been for you? (referring to the attention)

-Tarjei: I have just been going to work, to do acting, which i love! So that has been a lot of fun. 

-Interviewer: Has it been a deliberate choice to shield yourself for your season?

-Tarjei: Yes

-Interviewer: Why?

-Tarjei: Because i have fun on my own

-Interviewer: How many instagram followers do you think missed? You would surely have like a million. 

-Tarjei: Yeah it sure could have been, that’s not so bad. (laughs)

-Interviewer: When i look at you i want to date both of you. You two had to hook up and do all sorts of things. How has it been to act as boyfriends? 

-Tarjei: It has been great (koselig)

-Henrik: I think, since we did it together and had a good chemistry, it became a comfortable thing instead of being intimidating. It made it easier to dare and venture into, because it isn’t really a intimidating thing to kiss a guy. 

-Tarjei: It’s really the same as kissing a girl

-Henrik: just with a little stubble. (They both laugh)

-Tarjei: And it is not a challenge to act in love with the character Henrik portrays.

-Interviewer: I dreamt i kissed Henrik in a bathroom. 

-Tarjei: I probably did too. 

-Interviewer: How is it to kiss Henrik:

-Tarjei: Very great. 

-Interviewer: How is it to kiss Tarjei:

-Henrik: He is very skilled, i dont know where he get’s his training. 

-Interviewer: You have kissed a lot in your season.

-Henrik: Yeah it was a part of the job to kiss. 

-Tarjei: Yeah it’s a part of the job now to kiss (i couldn’t really hear what he said)

-Interviewer: I would like to say thank you for the effort you put into your performance, it has been super important for a lot people. You are nominated today, what to you think your chances are? 

-Tarjei: (something along the lines of not wanting to speculate, i guess he says)

-Henrik: I dont think we dare to think about winning. 

(Tarjei leaves)

-Interviewer: ask Henrik what he’s wearing

-Henrik: H&M

-Interviewer: Wow you’re so handsome, that you suit H&M so well.

-Henrik: Thanks

-Interviewer: What expectation to you have for tonights party?

-Henrik: I have never been to Gullruten, actually not many celebrity parties at all, so i’m just gonna have fun with the boys. 

5

Owen x Reader


“Alright so you don’t want to talk about the Raptors let’s talk about (Y/N).” Hoskins declared and Owen sighed.

 

“(Y/N)’s one of my best assistants, anything that I need doing gets done and she’s quick to get everyone in line so I can get on with working on the Raptors.” Owen finished and rolled his eyes because he knew what Hoskins would say next.

 

“Hope the girls got enough energy after all that to go all night.” He chortled and Owen shot him a disapproving glance. “If I was cooped up in that trailer with her I’d lose my job with the amount of work I’d skip.”

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I made my own ashkore/masked man!! (actually i want him to be a grandpa buttttt it was 2 am when i sketched this)
i hope he has a pet dragon please let him have a pet dragon
also: he doesn’t have vitiligo, those are burn scars

Get Used To It (lyrics)

I wrote this song just now inspired by a couple things. First by all the people who are uncomfortable with the changes I’ve been making and the ones basically saying I’m not built to last. That was the original inspiration but then as I got to the second verse and the bridge I started thinking of elementary and middle school kids and how they need to hear certain things and be built up a little. I just heard about an ELEVEN YEAR OLD who committed suicide and it legit broke my heart. Like suicide is horrible enough as it is but 11 years old my gosh, that’s just way too young to already be that crushed by the world 😭 I started thinking of those kids singing along with this song and what they’d need to hear so that’s what the second verse and bridge are. I also wanted to give the perspective of how haters/bullies/people who doubt you in general always come from a place of fear and insecurity and we just have to remember that they’re not living the kind of lives we want to live so we can just ignore them and stay on our own paths. So yeah let me know if you like it haha 🙈


V1: There was a time I was just like you, I let fear tell me what to do. I was broken down, I was missin out, I wasn’t living the way that I wanted to. I used to think that I wasn’t enough, I let my fears come and shut me up, yeah. I was wasting time, I was dead inside. I was living but I wasn’t alive.
PRE: I made some big changes, stopped living for the strangers. I started to listening to the voice inside. Now I’m onto something greater, this one’s for all my haters. It’s time I showed you a different side.
CHORUS: You’re gonna see me around doing what I want, working hard til I get all the things I want. Yeah, I could hang around, I could wait around. But that’s that’s that’s not how I’m doing it.
I’m not the scared little girl that I was before, I don’t need your permission anymore. Yeah, I’m doing it, I’m proving it, you’re gonna have to get get get used to it.
V2: I hear you talking behind my back, I guess I have to cut you some slack. You’ve been broken down, you’ve been missing out. You’re not living the way that you want to. But that’s not my problem this time, say what you want I’ll be just fine yeah. You don’t get to choose, if I win or lose, that’s just not up to you.
PRE: I’m doing so much better, turns out I’m pretty clever. There’s so much more to me than meets the eye. I’m onto something greater, this one’s for all my haters. It’s time I showed you a different side.
CHORUS
BRIDGE: This is me. I am enough. I am strong. I am tough. Not gonna quit. I’m gonna fight. I’m gonna live a beautiful life.
(Higher) this is me. I am enough. I am strong. I am tough. Look at me now, shining so bright. I’m gonna live a beautiful life.

If Harry Potter had Narration
  • Narrating Harry: I was so busy looking for those Horcruxes, I almost forgot the most important thing...
  • Actual Harry: *goes up to Draco before leaving to sacrifice himself*
  • Actual Draco: Potter, what are you-
  • Actual Harry: *kisses him* chose the right side Draco. Save them if I can't.
  • Narrating Harry: I had my own life to live before I ended it for them... for him.
  • Actual Harry: *turns to run down the stairs and into the forest to die*
  • Actual Draco: *grabs his wrist* *looks Harry in the eye* I will. I'm so sorry-
  • Actual Harry: Don't. All that matters is that you're on our side now. *takes wrist back* *runs down the stairs*
  • Narrating Draco: *to narrating Harry* And I made you proud, right?
  • Narrating Harry: *breathy laugh* yeah, you did
If It’s You (M)

A one-shot based on a request from @sunshinehobi7. Hope you like it Rachel!

Hoseok and You

Genre: Fratboy Hoseok, fluff, smut and a little angst thrown in for good measure heh heh

Word count: 7, 205 words

~•~•~•~

Crossing the threshold of the house felt like stepping into a different world. The music was so loud it felt like the whole place was thumping in time with the beats. It was not usually your scene but when your roommate, Amy, asked if you wanted to go to the party with her she didn’t have much persuading to do. You had just finished your finals, you deserved a break and socialise after being cooped up with books for so long and maybe kick back a beer or two.

So here you were. You smiled and greeted the other students you knew as you delved further into the house, letting Amy lead you to the spacious living room. It didn’t feel very big now that it was packed with a large amount of people chatting and dancing with no organisation whatsoever as it typically was at this sort of gathering.

An hour or so later found you still in the same room, not having moved much from your original spot where you leaned against the wall, talking to some of your friends about plans for the break. Your legs were aching from standing too long and you’d give anything to be able to sit down on the couch you were sure was in the middle of the room somewhere, but so many people had been crowding it that you hadn’t even been able to see it most of the time.

Then a group of people finally shuffled off to gift you with a view of the couch. However, it wasn’t the furniture that caught your attention, but the people sitting on it. One particular person, to be exact. The people flanking him on either side did not matter to you; you were instantly drawn to the man sprawled on the couch, his body lean and relaxed. His hair was not quite blonde, perhaps it was the lighting in the room playing tricks on you but it looked peach; a colour you’d brand silly on anyone else, but on him it seemed fitting and suited to his tanned skin.

He tilted his head right at that moment and caught your eye. That was when you decided that just as his hair colour suited his tan, his slightly darkened skin matched the sunny smile that he flashed you even more. The curve of your lips hitched upwards reflexively as you returned his intense gaze with your own that was filled with wonder. Never had you felt so drawn to someone before, and it was not just his looks either, because you’d met guys who were drop dead gorgeous yet didn’t feel the pull that you were experiencing now.

You were unsure if he thought that you were as magnetic as you found him to be, but you knew that his gaze was piercing you longer than necessary, spanning almost a minute before he leaned on his side to say something to the girl sitting next to him, never taking his eyes off of you. The girl’s expression took on a look of surprise, then she nodded and walked out of the room. His grin turned into one of proud triumph as he patted the vacant seat, motioning for you to come over and take it.

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Lunch (Jeff Atkins)

Requested: yes (my first request yay!) 

Words: 2541

Request: nishattazz: Hey here’s an idea! Anyways, I LOVE Jeff and I hope they explore his character if they do season 2. ANYWAYS! I want an imagine where y/n is a friend of Hannah’s like how Jeff is to clay. And basically Jeff and y/n have always liked each other and they kind of know that they have feelings for each other, but y/n always put a had front up and likes to play hard to get. So an example would be that Hannah and y/n are eating lunch and they see clay and Jeff on another table. Y/n is pushing Hannah, but she won’t do it and Hannah turns it around and y/n is like meh! And then c&j come over and ask what they’re talking about. Y/n blatantly say ‘you’ to clay and starts eating normally. And then Jeff put his hand around y/n and her eyes widen at Hannah, she pulls his hand down and he does it again. This time he pulls her into her, and she’s trying to still play hard. A lot of funny and flirty moments, maybe like he intimidates her and walks her into the lockers until he gets a date, complimenting her etc. And like he snakes his hands around her waist and leans his head on her should from behind.

Hi guys! So this is my first imagine and I hope everyone will like it especially the one who requested it!
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Ella

Hey, it’s Ella, Ella Montoya. Don’t worry nothing bad happened. I’m just going to tell you the story of how I fell in love. So lean back and grab a snack and let me tell you how this all began.

Liberty High, Senior Year

“Ella! Hey!” Hannah called, running after the blonde
“Hannah Baker, to what do I owe the pleasure?” Ella grinned
“Well, I need help in Spanish and Ms. Gomez suggested you for tutoring?” Hannah said nervously, eyes locked on the ground
“Yeah sure! Meet me at the library after school?” Ella said happily, but when is Ella not happy? That is one of the many reasons why people enjoyed talking to her, she has never greeted anyone without a smile.
“Okay thanks!” Hannah said
“No problem” Ella grinned

But for me, Hannah Baker helped me more than I helped her.

After School

“So, what does el pan mean?” Ella asked, tucking her hair behind her ear

“Um, A cup?” Hannah said, but more like asked
“No but it means bread” Ella giggled
“Oh my gosh. I’m sorry. This is what I meant when I said I needed help” Hannah said
“Don’t worry, It’s okay. You’re not the first person to have trouble” She assured the curly headed girl
“Thanks for doing this” Hannah said gratefully
“No problem! So I think I know why you’re having trouble” Ella smirked
“Really? Why?” Hannah asked
“Well for starters, you keep glancing at Clay Jensen. Tell me do you like him?” Ella said
“Yes. No. Wait. I think?” Hannah said, looking at Ella who just raised an eyebrow
“Ugh yes!” Hannah finally concluded
“Yay! I definitely have to get you two together!” Ella squealed
“How about you and me head down to Monet’s and get together there, bonita” A voice said, Ella turned around and there he was, Jeff Atkins, star baseball player of Liberty High and behind him was Clay Jensen, who kept glancing between the floor and Hannah, who was also glancing at Clay.
“Hi Jeff” Ella said bluntly
“C'mon I like you, you like me! Why are you making this hard?” Jeff pestered
“Not everything is supposed to be easy, Jeff. C'mon Hannah, let’s go. I’ll give you a lift home. Bye Clay” she smirked at the two oblivious lovebirds.
“Thanks. Bye Jeff, bye Helmet” Hannah said, waving to the two boys
“Bye” Clay said, waving back
“Bye Hannah. I’ll see you tomorrow, hermosa!” Jeff shouted, earning him a ‘shh’ from multiple students.

In Ella’s Car

“So?” Hannah grinned, smiling a smile that that was bigger than the Cheshire Cat’s

“What?” Ella asked

“What’s between you and Jeff?” Hannah grinned even more if that was possible

“Nothing” Ella smiled

“Oh yeah sure! That smile means nothing” Hannah scoffed

“Okay let me tell you, Jeff made it clear that he likes me and sometime between his confession and now, I also made it clear that I like him back” Ella explained, pulling out of where her car was parked

“Then why are’t you two together?” Hannah questioned

“Because! What if I’m nothing but a conquest for him? How do I know that he’s not part of some group that sleeps with girls and keeps score in some sort of secret play book?” Ella exclaimed, keeping most of her focus on the road in front of her and the other on Hannah talking

“Okay you have to stop watching Riverdale and you need to listen to me, Jeff is literally the nicest jock at Liberty High and it looked like he really likes you and I think you should give him a chance” Hannah smirked

“But what if he-” Ella got cut off by Hannah shushing her

“No buts!”

“Okay” Ella sighed

“How about this? If I get at least a B in a Spanish test then you have to give Jeff a chance” Hannah negotiated

“Okay. If you don’t then you- you have to tell Clay that you like him” Ella said

“Excuse me?”

“Oh sorry correction, you don’t like him-” Ella started

“Yes” Hannah sighed

“You looooove him!” Ella continued laughing

“What? No! I don’t- Shut up!” Hannah blushed, making her cheeks pinker than what a blush powder can do

“Awhh! Hannah Baker’s blushing, Hannah Baker’s blushing” Ella sang, laughing afterwards

The next day

“Hey Ella!” Hannah called

“Hannah Baker! What do you got for me?” Ella smiled

“Well I’m doing a test later in Spanish” Hannah revealed

“Won’t that test determine if you need a tutor or not?” She asked

“Yeah but tutor or not, I still want you to be my friend” Hannah grinned

“Awh thanks Hannah Banana! Eat with me later at lunch!” Ella squealed

“Yeah sure!” Hannah giggled and there they were chatting about things when Ella heard that voice that instantly made her day

“Hey bonita!” He called

“Ugh Jeff” Ella groaned, pretending to not be fazed by his presence

“Bye, Ella” Hannah winked, walking away to her classroom

“Let me walk you to class” Jeff offered

“Thanks but no thanks. I’m capable of walking to class on my own and don’t you have class in the other building?” Ella declined

“So you know my schedule?” Jeff grinned, outside he was happy but inside he was jumping up and down out of happiness

“Yeah” Ella said

“May I ask why?” Jeff asked curiously

“So I know what classes to steer clear of” Ella smirked

“That hurt me, hermosa. You should know that” Jeff faked groaned, his hand holding the chest part above his heart but Ella just smiled at him and walked away.

As she walked away, Jeff watched her with a smile on his face that always appeared whenever she was around before walking away.

At Lunch

Ella and Hannah walked over to a vacant table, carrying their trays and sat down.

“So? How did you do on the test?” Ella asked then taking a bite from her fruit salad

“I don’t know but I think I failed it” Hannah said, pushing her food around with her fork

“Be positive. You probably did good” Ella encouraged

“Thanks. And good enough to get a B, so you can finally give Jeff a chance?” Hannah said, suddenly having her big grin

“Nah you probably failed” Ella joked then taking another bite from her salad

“Okay ouch!” Hannah laughed, throwing a fry at her

“Hannah, Clay hasn’t taken his eyes off of you since we sat down. Look C or not, you have to tell the poor guy that you like him back!” Ella exclaimed

“I can’t!” Hannah said

“Why not?” Ella asked

“I don’t know why!” Hannah said

“Just tell him and- Jeff and Clay are on their way here” Ella said shocked

“Hey girls, what are you talking about?” Jeff asked, taking a seat next to Ella

“We are talking about Clay” Ella said bluntly

“Me?” Clay asked, sliding into the seat next to Hannah

“Yes Clay, you” Ella said

They continued talking, but not about Clay anymore obviously the poor boy would probably be tomato red if that conversation continued on. So as they were chatting and eating, Jeff did the oldest trick in the book,  The old yawn-then-arm-over-shoulder trick on Ella.

“Okay Jeff, we are at the cafeteria, not at a cinema in the Crestmont” Ella said pushing his arm off her shoulders

“Then let’s go to the Crestmont, after school and catch a movie?” Jeff offered

“Jeff, for the hundredth time-” Ella started

“Ella! Can I tell you something for minute?” Hannah cut in

“Sure, We’ll be right back boys” Ella said following Hannah to the side where they were out of earshot

“You have to give him a chance!” Hannah said

“Okay” Ella said

“Wow that was easy. Okay let’s go and-” Hannah said before getting cut off

“I just wanna see the B on your Spanish test paper” Ella said, tapping her foot

“Okay” Hannah shrugged, pulling out a folded paper from her pocket

“Hannah?” Ella rolled her eyes at the sight of the contents of the paper

“Yeah?” Hannah sheepishly said

“This is a B” Ella said slowly

“Yup” was all Hannah said

“From your old school!” Ella exclaimed

“Well you never said the recent test paper” Hannah shrugged

“I- ugh Hannah Baker, you are one sneaky mujer” Ella groaned

“What does that mean?” Hannah blinked

“Look it up” Ella simply said, returning to the table and taking her seat next to Jeff

“Jeff?” Ella started nervously

“Yeah?”

“Yes” Ella said quickly

“What?” Jeff said clear shock on his face

“Yes” Ella repeated

“What?” Jeff said again still shocked

“Yes! I’m saying yes to-” Ella laughed

“I know! But you finally said yes!” Jeff exclaimed happily, standing up

“Jeff, calm down!” Ella laughed

“The girl of my dreams finally said yes! Woohoo!” Jeff pumping his fist in the air

“Before Jeff starts jumping from table to table Clay, Hannah likes you” Ella revealed and both Clay and Hannah was blushing from the revelation

“Ella!” Hannah said blushing

“Bye! Love you Hannah Banana!” Ella sang, standing up and running to Jeff, who was standing next to Justin’s group’s table and pestering Zach

“Jeff! Leave poor Zach alone!” Ella scolded and he ran off happily again

“Sorry about him” Ella apologized to Zach

“Don’t worry about it. Congratulations” Zach smiled at the blonde

“Thanks” Ella said then went to Jeff to calm him down

“Jeff! Calm down!” Ella laughed, giving him a kiss on the cheek which made him stop immediately

“Okay, bonita” Jeff grinned

“Now Crestmont, after school?” Ella smiled back

“That’s the plan” Jeff said kissing her on the forehead

“ELLA MONTOYA! YOU’RE DEAD!” The couple broke apart at the sudden words of Hannah Baker

“See ya!” Ella grinned kissing Jeff on the cheek before running away from Hannah

“Bye” Jeff chuckled

He was happy that he finally got the girl of his dreams.

Now let’s go back to Ella and Hannah and see how’s their chase is going.

“THIS IS FOR TELLING CLAY!”

“NO HANNAH! DON’T!”

Or maybe we shouldn’t…

After Classes

Ella was putting some of her stuff in her locker, humming to herself when she felt arms wrapping around her waist and by the sudden warm feeling that grew in her she knew who it was.

“Hey, cariñoa” Jeff said placing his chin on her shoulder

“Hi” Ella giggled turning around to place a kiss on his cheek

“Are you ready?”

“Sure! Oh wait! Hannah!”

“She told me to tell you that she’s working today” Jeff said

“Okay then let’s go!” Ella smiled closing her locker and pulling Jeff by the hand to the school doors

At The Crestmont

The couple were walking towards the ticket booth when they heard a voice that they never expected to hear.

“Hey!” Hannah grinned from inside the ticket booth

“Oh hey, it’s Hannah!” Ella grinned

“Hey, Hannah” Jeff greeted her

“You work here?” Ella asked

“Yeah. it’s good money” Hannah chuckled

“Here you go” Hannah said giving them two tickets

“How much?” Jeff asked reaching into his pocket for his wallet

“On the house! What’s the use of having a friend that works at the movies if you can’t get in for free” Hannah whispered

“Thanks! Monet’s on Sunday?” Ella asked

“Sure! Now go! You might miss the movie!” Hannah laughed

Jeff and Ella were walking and laughing at each other’s jokes when again they were surprised at someone who they never expected to be there

“Clay!” Ella called walking over to the concession stand where Clay was the cashier

“Hey” Clay greeted the couple

“Hey, man” Jeff said doing a some sort of guy handshake with Clay

“You work here?” Jeff asked

“Yes! It’s good money here” Clay answered

“And the girl he likes works up front” Ella smirked

“Dude, she’s right. When are you going to ask her out? I mean you know she likes you.” Jeff asked, Ella nodding in agreement

“Soon? I don’t know! Now go to your movie! You might-”

“Miss our movie? Yeah we know” Ella laughed

“Good! Now here’s two complimentary drinks and jumbo popcorn” Clay said giving them the said items

“Wow, Clay and Hannah working here just saved you 20 dollars” Ella realized

“Even if they didn’t work here I’ll get anything for you"Jeff sweetly said

So the couple walked to the cinema and went to their seats

“So, tell me what is the movie about?” Ella whispered leaning close to Jeff

“I don’t know” Jeff whispered back

“Who’s the lead in the movie?” Ella whispered again

“I don’t know” Jeff whispered back

“Do you know anything about the movie?” Ella laughed

“No” Jeff laughed

After the movie

“So? How was our date? Tell me, do you want to marry me now?” Jeff asked jokingly

“The date was perfect and maybe or maybe not. Let’s see how this relationship goes” Ella chuckled

“I’m in a relationship? I thought I was in a dream” Jeff said smoothly

“Smooth, Atkins, smooth” Ella laughs as they got into the car

Ella’s street

“Park here. my house is like three blocks away and I don’t wanna disturb my parents and brother with the headlights” Ella said, so Jeff parked at the side

“Walk me to my house?” Ella asked

Jeff nodded and turned off the engine, taking off his seat belt and Ella doing the same. They both got out of the car and started walking to Ella’s house

“Tell me, why wouldn’t you say yes to me when we both found out that we liked each other and I asked you out?” Jeff asked while they were walking and holding hands

“Honestly? I was scared that I was just something you do and dump when you’re done” Ella answered nervously

“I’ll die before that happens, cariñoa” Jeff promised

Before they knew it they were in front of Ella’s front door and Jeff’s eyes flickered to her eyes then to her lips then he started to lean in and Ella doing the same then their lips collided against each other and Jeff felt Ella smile into kiss and sparks flew but like the night, the moment had to end and so when they pulled away they both blushed and promised to call the other back. Ella took her keys out and opened the door and gave Jeff a peck on the lips before bidding him goodnight and closing the door. Behind the door Ella smiled and touched her lips still feeling the sparks from the kiss and outside the door there stood Jeff who also touched his lips an feeling the same and started walking to his car. The memory of the kiss replaying inside his head.

The Next Day

At Ella’s house

Ella laid in the living room, reading a book though she couldn’t focus on it as she remembered the events of last night when the doorbell rang. She stood up and answered it.

“Hey, hermosa ” There stood Jeff with a bouquet of pink roses and a smile

“Hey! aw thank you! What are you doing here?” Ella said pecking him on the lips when he handed her the roses

“We are going on an adventure!” Jeff announced

“Really? Where!” Ella asked excited

“Calm down hermosa, it’s a secret” Jeff laughed and Ella laughed back and just looked at Jeff mentally thanking Hannah for convincing her to say yes to Jeff.

“Well? let’s go! We have a long journey ahead of us!” Jeff said, grabbing her hand and pulling a smiling Ella to his awaiting car to start their adventure.

THE END

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YAY my first imagine! I hope ya’ll liked it and if you want to see more like this just request! I’ve got 2 Jeff imagines and 1 Clay imagine coming in the days to come! Hope you guys loved it!