-hazeapalooza: “so is no one going to talk about c’s mad flush right now?” so is no one going to talk about how nursey 100% checked out chowder’s mad flush right now? also: c. c!!!! C!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - hazeapalooza cont. “nursey i’m not a lightweight i can drink three whole beers and stop all your dumb shots.” translation: “nursey i may be drunk but i can still impress you, look-” - shinny: “wow, c -” [C!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!] “- seriously never seen a frozen lake before?” - “it’s not just some lake it’s the pond! and it’s not like it happens every day in san francisco, nursey.” me: stares at my horrible wood checkered ceiling trying to regulate my breathing while i imagine chowder and nursey showing each other their home cities with a big ol road trip in between - shinny AND junior show feature a classic. a fav…… the same fond nursey smile-smirk that always seems to crop up when he’s teasing chowder.
how often does this happen??????????????????????????????????
- if you look close enough in ‘post I: roadie’ chowder and nursey are both team attic. enough said - taddy tour: we witness our confident sophomores mentoring the taddies :’) this has nothing to do with them together but it just warms my dead heart so it’s going on the list - hi, honey - parts 1 & 2: LISTEN TO ME NURSEY’S BAG WAS RIGHT THERE!!!!!!!!!!!! BY THE STAIRS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NURSEY’S BAG WAS RIGHT THERE BY THE STAIRS I CAN’T SAY THIS ENOUGH. IT WAS LATE AND THERE WAS A STORM OUTSIDE AND NURSEY SLEPT OVE.R SO do with this information what you will
- “chowder: hey jack are you going to watch the sharks game or the kings game if youlike LA uh i’m from san francisco so– nursey: dude. chill.” [holster voice] oh my god i’m so sorry but i sTIILL GEEET JEEALLOUSS - “NOOOO NURSEY DON’T TELL HIM COME ON NO NO NO”/nursey found out it was chowder’s birthday and immediately told bitty and probably EVERYONE ELSE SO THEY COULD ALL CELEBRATE THE GREATEST DAY OF THE YEAR ! - “chowder: we tried to get nursey to take intro programming with us!” at the point this was tweeted in the check please time line………..i guarantee you 10000% this was chowder’s idea. he just wants to spend more time with nursey :’) :’) :’’’) - i just like these tiny faces together, look at em
- “chow: oooh!! so if nursey & i prove you’re superstitious, we win! dex:…shit. win what? nurse: yo i don’t even know bro but you shook on it” #gotyourback - “in other news, dex and nursey have found the one thing they have in common: their love of chirping chowder” i believe on this same twitter account someone said something along the lines of ‘chirping and flirting are variants on the same idea’ so…………………..yea - “well, two samwell [winter screw’s] down, two more to go.”/”i hope the frogs had a good time. well, chowder and nursey aren’t here, so they probably did.” 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀 -”from row 6 on the bus to NY chowder: …and we all had quiche!! nursey: and i wasn’t invited, c?? yo, CHILL! oh, nursey. you’re so not chill.” ……………………….bitty said it not me - nursey and chowder were in charge of bringing bitty to the haus to surprise him with the oven can you imagine them smiling at each other like a buncha goofs behind bitty’s back while nursey tweeted!!!!!!!!!!!! amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -”dinner talk nursey: some netflix and chill chowder: ohhh I love netflix” 😏
i dedicate this post to @omgcphee who encouraged me to do it in the first place. there’s probably more that i missed and i’m sure there’s stuff in the extras too but please……….it’s there.. . for all to see. i’ve witnessed it and now you all have too. feel free to add to this post
Request: Anon: 38 with Archie please! I love your blog and your writing 💓
38. “He better only be just a friend.”
Summary: the reader’s cousin comes to visit riverdale but Archie doesn’t know so he gets a little jealous.
A/N: I’m sorry it’s so short. I hope you like it anon. Enjoy!! xx
Sitting in a Pop’s booth, you were laughing you head off as you and your cousin were swapping family stories and he had just told you about your Aunt and her new puppy. Apparently she had left the pup’s food open and came back to see the puppy locked in the food bin with no food left. Calm down from your laughter and reach out and grabbed your cousin’s hand.
“I’m so glad you’re here (Y/C/N),”
“Me too (Y/N), you look so different,”
“Yea well I feel different,”
“So you’re glad you moved away,”
“As sad as it sounds, yes. I needed a change and Riverdale gave it to me.” As you guys kept talking and catching up, Archie walked into Pop’s to collect food for his dad when he saw you. He saw the way your cousin kept making you laugh and kept touching your hand and he got jealous. ‘Who is this guy?’ He questions himself.
Before he could say anything to the two of you he was given his food and he went back home. But the image of you and the other guy was ingrained on his mind and the more he thought about it, the more hurt and jealous he got. He decided that when you got home he’ll confront you about it.
Meanwhile, you and your cousin were having a great time. Before you both knew it was almost curfew so you made your way through the suburban streets, his arm around your shoulders in a friendly gesture. You both laughed as you kept talking and Archie watched as the two of you went inside your house, oblivious to his jealousy.
“Dad! I’ll be back soon,” he called out as he walked over to your place. You heard he doorbell and went to answer it before your mum called out saying she’ll answer the door. Outside Archie could hear your laughter and the sound made him relax, until he thought about who was making you laugh. The door swings open.
“Hi, Mrs (L/N). Is (Y/N) home?”
“Why yes she is, come on in. (Y/N)!”
“Oh that’s alright I can just talk to (Y/N) out here, it’ll only be quick,”
“Archie!” You greet him with a kiss before closing the door.
“He better only be just a friend,“
“What?” His statement caught you off guard.
“The guy in your room,” he clarifies with a ‘who else’ look. You start laughing again.
“(Y/N), I’m serious. Who is he?” It takes you a solid five minutes before you are able to reply.
“Oh Archie, you have nothing to worry about,”
“He’s my cousin!” You start laughing all over again.
“Oh,” he mumbles as his cheeks turn a red that could rival his hair.
“He came to Riverdale to check up on me and to make sure I’m not struggling and letting my pride not let me go back,” you hug him as you start telling him this. He wraps his arms around you.
“I’m sorry (Y/N),” he mumbles into your hair.
“It’s all good,” you laugh, “would you like to come in and meet him?”
“Nah,” he starts rubbing his neck. “I’ll let you two catch up. I’ll swing by tomorrow.”
“Ok,” and you reach up to kiss him.
“I love you, and I would never cheat on you.”
“I know, I’m sorry. I love you too.”
A/N: sorry it’s so short. I hope you all like it!!
Y/N = your name, N/N = nickname, Y/C/N = your cousin’s name
A/N: Fun fact! This is my first time writing smut so my apologies if this totally sucks. I also want to say i’m sorry that I didn’t upload a story on Saturday. I had Halloween parties all weekend and honestly I was just avoiding the smut. But, now i’m back and all is well. So yea,
Hope you enjoy :-)
The monitor illuminated his face with a faint blue light. The blinking cursor was almost taunting him. Calum watching the line flash on his screen with his tired eyes. He sat back in his squeaky office chair and stared up at the dim fluorescent lights. Calum decided the ceiling tiles weren’t much more interesting that the computer screen. He spun around in his chair taking in his cramped cubicle. He dreaded these four small walls. He had tried his best to personalize his area with pictures, posters, even a silly object here and there but it underneath it still remained dull and gray. The sound of typing keys filled the office, which Calum usually blocked out, was now deafening. He rubbed his hands over his face, trying to keep his sanity. A glance at the clock in the bottom of his desktop showed him that there was only one hour left. He could make it. Calum decided a little conversation might prevent him from going crazy. He stood up leaned over the small wall that separated him and his friend, Michael.
“Hey man, what’s up?” Calum inquired.
“Uh, not much,” Michael replied, glancing at Calum then right back to his desktop with his nose nearing touching the screen.
“What are you even doing?” Calum pondered, leaning over to glance at Michael’s computer.
“Check this out,” Michael turned the monitor toward his friend “It’s the new secretary, Blair. Damn, I’d like to take her out sometime, and by take her out I mean-”
Calum held his hand up to stop Michael from continuing his sentence. “Yea, I know what you mean.” He chuckled lightly. “She not really my type though.”
Michael looked at him astonishingly. “Not your type? Cal, since when is any girl not your type?”
Calum shrugged “I don’t know man, I’m just not into her like that”. Just as he said this Y/N, his boss, left her office and headed to the break room.
Michael followed his gaze towards the woman “Oh, I get it. You’ve got a thing for the boss!” he exclaimed
Calum quickly shushed Michael so that no one would over hear. “Dude shut up, I don’t. I just think shes really hot.”
“I mean you’re not wrong. I saw her in that tight skirt today and I swear, she’s not wearing any underwear” Michael winked
“I bet I can find out” Calum said cockily.
“No way” Michael said, turning his head back to his screen.
“Yes way, fifty bucks says i’ll even find out what color it is” He challenged.
Michael looked at him skeptically “How are you planning on doing that, exactly?”
Calum laughed “that’s for me to know and you to find out” then Calum grabbed some papers of his desk and walked out of his small working space.He walked towards Y/N’s office, beaming with confidence.
He knocked on her door and waited a few moments before a stunning Y/N appeared before him. Michael was right, her skirt was tight and from Calum’s height he could see perfectly down her white button up shirt. Her voice broke him out of his thoughts.
“Mr. Hood, do you need something?” Y/N asked, slightly impatient.
“Yes ma’am, I just wanted to give you this week’s report files” He said as he gestured towards the papers.
“Oh, yes, right. You can just put those on my desk please.” Y/N stood back and opened the door wider so that he could come into her office.
Calum walked in, placed the papers on Y/N’s desk, then turned around and leaned against it so that he was now facing her “Y/N, I think we both know why i’m here”
Y/N looked confused at him “I’m afraid I don’t know what you mean”
He sighed and pushed off of the wooden surface and began to walk towards her. Once he was right in front of her he reached behind her, shutting and locking the door. “I know you want me.”
Y/N looked at Calum as if he had two heads “excuse me, this is highly inappropriate”
He smirked “The way I think about you is highly inappropriate” he said as he reached around her waist and pull her so close that their chests were touching.
She furrowed her eyebrows at the tall man “Are flirting with me right now, Mr. Hood?”
“Maybe I am flirting with you, what are you gonna do about it?”
When Y/N did nothing, Calum grabbed the back of her head, bringing their lips together in a passionate yet messy kiss.
The two pulled away, both breathing heavily. Y/N’s eyes were wide with shock but also lust.
She always found Calum attractive but she knew that she could never act upon her feelings. If Calum and Y/N were to ever initiate a relationship or else they both would be immediately terminated and she really couldn’t afford that. She was after all the head of her division.
Calum couldn’t help himself at this point. His member was already beginning to harden in his trousers due to their close proximity and the effect her lips had on him. “You make me so hot Y/N. God, I need you now”
She bit her lip, pondering whether the risk was worth the reward. “Mr. Hood, I don’t think this is a good idea” she said trying to keep things professional.
“Y/N” Calum spoke while rubbing circles in her back “I see the way you look at me when you think i’m not paying attention. I know you want me as much as I want you. Don’t lie to yourself. Come on, I can treat you right”
That was all she needed. She closed the space between their lips. Calum heard her moan into the kiss and it drove him crazy. She drove him crazy.
He lightly pulled her with him to her desk. When they reached the wooden surface. Calum turned around swiped his hand across the top of the desk pushing all the materials onto the carpeted floor. He spun back to face Y/N, grabbing her waist and placed her onto the desk before returning back to the kiss. “Mr. Hood!” she exclaimed in anger “that stuff is expensive”
“No offense but, I honestly don’t give a fuck” Calum moved his lips to the corner of her mouth and began to trail kisses down to her neck, trying to find her sweet spot. He bit her skin softly then using his tongue to soothe the slight sting. When he heard her moan he felt his manhood twitch. Calum grabbed Y/N’s backside to pull her closer so he could grind into her clothed core. She gripped the back of his previously unwrinkled shirt so tight her knuckles were white.
He slipped his cool hands under her blouse making her shiver under his touch. She removed her hands from his back, ripping off his tie and making quick work of his shirt buttons. Once she had finished the task she hastily pushed the material off of his his shoulders. She then hopped off of her desk and started leaving kisses on Calum’s neck, leading down to the waistband of his pants. Y/N undid his belt and pulled down his slacks just enough enough to see him fully.
She licked her lips at the sight of him. Y/N took Calum’s girth in her hand and began to pump him slowly to tease him.
“Come on, Y/N” Calum groaned in frustration.
“Good things come to those who wait” she replied as she kissed the tip of his cock before she began to suck his head, teasing him a bit.
Calum moaned at the feeling of her lips wrapped around him “but the best things come to those who go and get them” he grunted. He tangled his finger in her hair and pushed all of himself into her mouth, causing her to choke slightly.
Y/N tried her best to suppress her gag reflex and steady her breathing. She began to bob her head as his member repeatedly hit the back of her throat, making her eyes tear up.
Suddenly, Calum pulled her off of him and roughly stood her up. He held a tight grip on her jaw as he brought their mouths together momentarily in a clash of teeth and tongues, before spinning her around and bending her over her own desk. He pulled up Y/N’s short pencil skirt to expose her barely there, pale pink, lace panties.
“Goddamn” Calum mumbled under his breath. He kneaded her ass with his large palms, squeezing the flesh which was beginning to redden. Y/N moaned softly when Calum trailed his hands from her ass to her moist core. He pushed the lace aside and and swiped his finger across her slit, collecting her juices onto the tips of his fingers. Y/N moaned at the feeling.
“You like that, princess?” he asks as he slid the thin fabric down her legs and casually shoved them into his pants pocket. He slowly pushed his digits into her glistening hole which made more soft moans leave her lips.
“You’re so tight baby. Can’t wait to fill you up with my hard cock” Calum spoke. He pumped himself a few times before pushing inside of her before beginning to move at an agonizingly slow pace.
“Calum, faster please” Y/N groaned.
“That’s Mr. Hood to you, sweetheart” with that he started pounding into her brutally. He gripped her hips so tight there would surely be bruises. Y/N moaned loudly but Calum quickly slapped his hand over her open mouth.
Calum leaned in, close to her face “Gotta be quiet princess. We wouldn’t anyone to hear, now would we?” he whispered into her ear.
Y/N shook her head, hardly able to comprehend what he was saying due to the movements of his hips. He removed his hand from her mouth and returned it to her hips. She whimpered softly and biting her lip, trying to make as little noise as possible.
He then pulled her up so her back was against his chest. He could now feel her glistening skin slide alongside his own. Calum wrapped one arm around her waist and the other playing with her nipples as he rammed into her mercilessly.
Y/N could now feel a knot in her stomach starting to form as Calum repeatedly her g-spot. Her hands soon found Calum’s and she gripped on as if she would float away.
Calum could feel Y/N tightening around him and knew she was close. He reached down and rubbed fast and sloppy circles onto her clit.
“I-I’m close” Y/N whimpered and leaned her head onto calum’s chest.
“I know, let go baby” Calum whispered to her.
With that que she felt the tightness in her gut finally snap. Her vision went white. Calum watched as her eyes fluttered and her mouth fell into a perfect ‘O’ shape.
Calum thrusted into her a few more times before releasing himself. The two milked their highs for as long as possible.
He pulled out of Y/N, which awoke her from her blissful state. She cleared her throat and started to pick up her clothes.
The tall, tan man chuckled at the woman. “Someone’s in a hurry”
Y/N looked at him astonishingly “Calum, what we did was wrong. Because of this slip up, we could lose our jobs. More importantly, I could lose my job!” She exclaimed as she smoothed her wrinkled top.
Calum rolled his eyes but still had a smirk planted on his face. He also picked up his clothes and began dressing himself. Once done, he walked towards the door. Before he twisted the knob he turned around to face Y/N who was busying herself by organizing her desk, which he had rudely ruined in the heat of the moment.
“Oh by the way” Y/N popped her head up to look at the talking man “nice ass” Calum chuckled before exiting the office.
He strode back to his small dull cubicle and sat down in his squeaky office chair. When he sat though he felt something in his pocket. Then he remembered.
“Hey, Michael” Calum said as he leaned onto the wall that separated the two work spaces.
“What” Michael replied as he looked up from his paperwork.
“Pink” Calum simply said.
When Michael gave him a confused look Calum threw the balled up lace panties from his fist, right onto his friend face.
Realization hit Michael as he groaned and pulled out his wallet.
i just wanted to say THAKN YOU to all the people who sent me an ask or a msg over chat about my fake subs and how they made you laugh, or how much you enjoy them.
thank you for taking the time to write out such kind words, i didn’t even think these fake subs could make people laugh out loud or cheer up so many shitty days so thats really cool. i dont reply to all of them but know that i read and appreciate every single one