so not kosher

2

since it’s october i got back into the drak pack and redesigned my redesigns. howler is a butch lesbian now and frankie’s a nerd

and then i watched the first episode of gravedale high and redesigned three characters from that too. they’re both made by hanna-barbera so a crossover is totally kosher. they’re all gay monster teens

anonymous asked:

Can I get a hc of the losers first day of high school pretty pleaase?🖤

ok this is so cute?? i have no clue how the american school system works so uh if theres any mistakes I’m sorry lmao also i got carried away so this is a lot less specific than i intended but i hope its ok!

  • over the summer, mike decided to tell his granddad that as much as he loves him and the farm, he really wants a formal education
  • he’s skeptical at first but he sees how passionate mike is about it so he lets him do what he wants with his future
  • as long as mike still helps out on the farm on weekends and tries his absolute best
  • not that thats a problem, because mikey is so worried about letting his granddad down, and buying all the supplies was hell expensive and this boy is DETERMINED to pay him back
  • bev moved back to derry with some old family friends who offered to take her in after her aunt had a baby and was struggling with the two of them
  • losers high school reunion? is oN


  • so first day of school rolls around, and all seven losers get up early so they can cycle there together and see each other properly
  • they have like a whole fucking hour before class starts though, because eddie was so insistent that they could under nO CIRCUMSTANCES be late on their first day
  • so they sit outside while bev n richie share a cig for old times sake, and talk about everything and nothing 
  • and its like they’ve never been apart


  • bill worked on his stammer so much over the summer, and even tho he’s still got it, the confidence he gained just like RADIATES off him
  • and stan is like… wow. who’s this proud and gorgeous boy??? what the fuck. 
  • (he’s secretly whipped.)


  • stan’s about the same height as richie now and still as lanky 
  • but his curls have grown out a bit so they flop around his face a bit and cover some of his scars, and bill thinks he looks like a beautiful jewish angel
  • (he does not tell him this.)


  • ben grew a lot during the summer, so even though he’s still nice n chubby he’s a lot stronger now and looks far more intimidating 
  • (he’s still a massive soft nerd who listens to NKOTB and writes poems)


  • even tho bev’s only been gone like…two years, she looks so much more grown up and ben is fLOORED
  • she still wears the key necklace she’s had for years
  • but her hair has grown out to her shoulders 
  • and she’s swapped her grubby dungarees for perfectly tailored dresses and vintage shirts (adjusted and sewn herself)
  • and she just looks a bEAUTY


  • richie? exactly the fucking same. the first words outta his mouth are an inappropriate joke, and his glasses are still crooked as hell. 
  • to bev’s distress, he doesn’t seem to have developed a sense of style either
  • not that he even cARES because he’s uhhh fully in love with his new boyfriend eddie
  • (they finally got together on the squad-minus-bev camping trip over the summer)
  • when bev sees them holding hands? she’s not even surprised bc its about fucking tIME these morons grew some balls and asked each other out


  • eddie looks almost the same, except without the fanny packs.
  • (he still carries a first aid kit in his bag though he’s not stupid)
  • and he’s now fully embraced his aesthetic of Pastel Prince


  • ben and mike (the only two losers who’ve signed up to a fuck ton of electives and honours placements) finally head off to AP calculus
  • bev and bill go to their visual arts class, and stan, eddie and richie go to history. 
  • stan is nOT HAPPY because now he has to sit through these two being soppy and richie fucking about and he doesn’t even have bill with him
  • on their way to their next class, some asshole trips mike in the corridor and shouts some racist shit
  • mike is trying to quietly collect his things and walk away, because he knows damn well what will happen if he tries to retaliate against this dumb white kid
  • but soft nerd ben just steps right up to the guys face, and fucking stares him down.
  • mike knows ben wouldn’t hurt a fuckin fly but in the face of all 170lbs of him, the other twat just like… backs the hell away
  • mike and ben have an unbreakable bond after that, and are always lookin out for each other


  • private losers club lunch table? uh yeh i think so
  • eddie and stan bring their own packed lunches every day 
  • (so stan knows it’s kosher and eddie isn’t worried about food hygiene)
  • stan makes sure he sits next to bill on the first day and makes up some dumb excuse 
  • “no bill i can’T sit over there richie chews so loudly”
  • bill doesn’t mind one bit
  • eddie and richie are also sitting next to each other, bickering and hand holding under the table
  • bev is next to her partner in crime richie, showing him new wave punk bands he’ll like
  • ben is opposite bev, chatting about their time since she left derry
  • mike sits next to his new homeboy ben


  • mikey is so obessed with proving himself that he signs up for every elective he can, and does clubs most days
  • no one knows how he maintains a top 10% gpa on top of helping at the farm but when he aces his SATs in senior year everyone is so damn proud
  • he plays on the football team and sits on the student council with ben
  • as a senior, he founded the school’s Equality Programme, helping more POC and LGBT students reach their full potential 
  • bill joined the journalism club and by junior year he’s in charge of the school paper
  • stan spends a lot of time in the print room with bill because it’s quiet
  • he does a lot of the photography for the paper as well
  • but mostly it’s so he gets a chance to chat with him and chill out together
  • stan finally gets bev to help him ask bill to senior prom 
  • he makes a whole fake news article with cute photos he’s taken and slides it into his locker one day
  • (bill said yes)
2

The Shaolin Cowboy: Who’ll Stop the Reign? #2 (of 4)

Geof Darrow (W/A/Cover), Frank Cho (Variant cover), and Dave Stewart ©
On sale May 24 • FC, 32 pages • $3.99 • Miniseries
The Shaolin Cowboy hits town, and it hits back. With King Crab in hot pursuit, he runs straight into the not-so-kosher menace of HOG KONG and his twisted tale of ham-fisted revenge. High-cholesterol-fueled action served up hot with plenty of chasers!

Recommended Obscure Musicals of the Week

1. Be More Chill
- Imagine “13” and “Little Shop of Horrors had a love-child. ‘Nuff said. Also, teen depression metaphors and a hype, funny soundtrack. (Lots of great audition songs)

2. Fortress of Solitude
- "Hairspray” and “Motown”’s love-child. But better. Lots of roles for POC. Lots of roles for teens.

3. Nine
Not super obscure, but really dark, twisted, and comedic. Definitely under-appreciated. There are lots of beautiful ballads here that I never see at auditions

4. Edges
A Pasek and Paul (team behind “Dear Evan Hansen). Emotional abuse themes. Basically a masterpiece.

5. A Man of No Importance
The only Ahrens and Flaherty that no one knows. So very Broadway, and one of their best. It’s about theatre and every-day struggles. It’s really lovely.

6. Vanities
Just listen to "Fly Into the Future” and get back to me.

7. Cops
If you haven’t already heard of “The Sensitive Song”….I don’t know what you’ve been doing. Basically it’s the best guy audition song ever, especially if you’re going in for something not-so-kosher.

archiveofourown.org
Les Amours De Marius - Chapter 1 - Elenchus - Les Misérables - Victor Hugo [Archive of Our Own]
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
By Organization for Transformative Works

OR The Fakest Fake Dating AU: a farce in four acts.

All Marius wants is for his grandfather to give him permission to marry the girl he loves. He’s not quite sure how this led to him pretending to be engaged to two of the most disreputable of his disreputable friend’s disreputable friends, but here they are, and Marius is nothing if not committed in the service of love.

A (loosely) canon era fake dating AU, staring Marius Pontmercy, Bahorel, and Grantaire.

Reminder to all my gluten-free/celiac friends that LOTS of Passover food will be on sale now, since Passover ended at sundown - so check the kosher section or holiday section of your local store for gluten-free deliciousness to stock up on. Wegman’s, especially, has a great Passover selection, and a lot of it is on sale right now but going out of stock really quickly. I got a bunch of gluten-free egg noodles for half what they normally cost, and treated myself to some gluten-free black-and-whites. 

The College Years - Sophomore Year (Chapter 29) - Stiles Stilinski

Author: @were-cheetah-stiles

Title: “The Babylonian Allegory”

Characters: Stiles Stilinski & Reader/OFC

Summary: Y/n and Stiles begin figuring out more about their new foe, and what brought it to Beacon Hills.

Chapter Twenty-Eight - Chapter Twenty-Nine - Chapter Thirty

Originally posted by super-f-r-i-e-n-d-s

Stiles woke as his nurse came in for pre-dinner rounds to check his vitals. He glanced down and saw his y/h/c haired girlfriend asleep on top of her notebooks on the edge of his bed. He motioned down to his nurse to pass him her laptop, and he tried to open it and adjust it in a way that was not painful for it to rest on his lap. He was researching for about an hour when she finally roused from her nap.

Keep reading

branclonsaads  asked:

i think you're spot on with the 'no webs on shabbat save for health/life or death situations.' with jewish observance that's always recognized as a valid reason to not participate in something. my mom and i don't fast on yom kippur because it makes us sick, and that's totally kosher, so i'd say the same would follow with superheroics haha. also ty for writing peter parker as jewish, bc i don't see how people can see him as anything other than jewish and yet in most spiderman material he's not

thank you!! the decision to portray peter as jewish came about after i read an interview with andrew where he said that, “[peter’s] jewish, it’s a defining feature.” and it struck me as really sad that none of that was allowed to come across in the movies… and for what? there’s nothing in the licensing agreement that says he can’t be jewish, and it surely wouldn’t have killed them to have peter reference his judaism even once? so it became like, okay, sony/marvel, peter’s going to celebrate chanukah and go to shul with his aunt, bite me.

also!  i just wanted to say that while googling re: superheros and shabbat just now i found this document, “the halachos of superheroes,” written by a real-life actual rabbi, which answers jewish legal questions pertaining to superheroes and it’s adooooooooooooorable:

anyway, according to this OFFICIAL document, here is the word on whether or not a superhero may violate shabbos: 

HOWEVER, peter is forbidden from wounding or injuring anyone on shabbat in non-life-threatening circumstances:

and even in life-threatening circumstances peter is bound to minimize violation of shabbos to the extent of his ability.

people are just. always ready to shit on judaism, even people I consider my close allies, and it’s so dehumanizing.

3

Suga get out of there.

This is a dumb Idea i’ve had in my head for like two months now and I only just got around to drawing it. (It’s because I’m procrastinating something else)

Judaism: “So, the Messiah is gonna come and it’s gonna be fab! World peace, no hatred, full understanding of divinity.  Heck, G-d is gonna even make pork kosher so we can celebrate Messiah time with bacon!  And EVERYONE is invited!!! EVERYONE. Jews, non-Jews! IT’S GONNA BE SO GREAT!!! Even bad people are gonna just spend like a 1 year cooling off period in hell and then they can TOTALLY JOIN THE PARTY!!! EVERYONE IS INVITED!!!!“

Christianity: "THERE SHALL BE THE TRIBULATION AND ALL THE NON BELIEVERS SHALL ENDURE YEARS OF TORTURE! Those who have not accepted Jesus shall spend their eternity burning in the lake of fire! He is the ONLY WAY! There shall be NO FORGIVENESS for those who have rejected our lord!”

Christians to Jews: “OMG, Jews, why don’t you accept Christianity?? It’s full of love and forgiveness. Your old testament god is so cruel and barbaric!”

jewishdragon  asked:

My cafeteria serves kosher-style meals (they use unkosher matzah but also the cooking surfaces aren't kosher so it wouldn't matter) during Passover (and specially made kosher ones if you inform them a week ahead of time, plus infinite kosher matzah no matter what) and today is Matzo Nachos and I'm just stunned because I have been blind to the possibilities until now

Um, I’m going to need more information about these Matzoh Nachos. DESCRIBE.

anonymous asked:

What does Judaism teach about handling alcoholism?

Hi there,

Do you mean drinking alcohol or alcoholism as a sickness?

In regard to simply drinking alcohol, wine is incredibly important for Shabbat and different holidays as we use it (really the ‘fruit of the vine’ so grape juice is also Kosher) to sancitfy Shabbat or holiday with the Kiddush.  We also often encourage people to get drunk on the holiday of Purim to the point where we cannot tell the difference between the evil character Haman and the righteous character Mordechai.  But there are also very valid arguments that one does not need to get drunk on Purim to fullfil the commandment of being “merry”.

In regard to alcoholism as a sickness, Judaism always believes that human life is most important.  If someone was challenged by alcoholism, Jewish tradition would encourage that person to do what is best for their health.  For instance, Alcohlic Anonymous and other similar programs would be encouraged to a person who needs them.  Most Synagogues today recognize this very real issue in people’s lives, and typically offer grape juice with wine for their Kidushim, and many are working on inclusion programs to help those with drinking challenges on Purim.

I hope that this answered your question!

PJ

anonymous asked:

I'm not old enough to drive, so sadly, I can't attend services on my own or attend the public Shabbat dinner in my area. I already wore a hasma because my parents are very superstitious, and I didn't know it had any Jewish significance, especially to Sephardi/Mizrahi Jews, which is my ethnic background, so when I found out I was like "HELL YEAH" because it's what my ancestors were before the Spanish Inquisition. can you give me advice on how to dress/simple prayers to say every day/keep kosher?

hahah the hamsa thing is funny

aw, so it sounds like you have a solid 3+ years before college (if you’re going that route). kudos to you for knowing that this is the life you want to live and for making that commitment. 

I tagged along with my brother’s ice hockey teammate’s family before I could drive.. I don’t know if something like that is an option for you. some people can be super welcoming if you say you’re interested in learning more about Judaism and attending a service.

lets break this up:

dress:

  • dress varies wildly from movement to movement and from community to community. 
  • I follow Conservative interpretations of halacha (Jewish law) so I wear pretty much whatever I want. I wear bikinis to the beach and low-cut tank tops and blah blah blah. I wear pants to synagogue if I’m cold/lazy enough. This is the norm in my community for sure, as well as most conservative and reform communities
  • most Orthodox communities abide by the value of tzinut (modesty) - the level of modesty observed definitely varies from community to community. some women will only wear skirts that cover their knees if they’re sitting. some will wear skirts/dresses that cover their knees if they’re standing. some make sure to cover their elbows AND collarbones, while some are less strict about that. it really varies from community to community.
  • there’s quite a few bloggers on jumblr who blog about “tzinut fashion” and the likes if you’re interested in that 
  • if you’re a dude, and you’re orthodox, from my understanding, a certain level of modesty is to be observed, but I’m not quite sure what that entails to be honest
  • if you want to join an Orthodox community eventually, you could start dressing modestly tomorrow. there’s a lot of resources on how to transition to dressing modestly, and I’d be happy to post some of those if that’s something you’re interested in. as with any of the mtizvot (commandments), don’t do it all at once because that’s stressful and hard to turn into a habit. even the most orthodox rabbis encourage converts and baalei teshuva (Jews who were raised reform, conservative, secular, etc. and later become Orthodox later in life) to go change their lifestyle in steps

simple prayers:

  • the easiest prayer to say every day is the shema
    • “shema yisrael, adonai eloheinu, adonai echad” - translates to “hear o israel, the lord is our G-d, G-d is one.” 
    • according to Jewish law, you’re supposed to say the shema once in the morning and once at night
    • the shema is supposed to be the last six words uttered by a Jew before they die too but that’s just a fun fact
    • the shema is part of a much longer prayer. there’s blessings beforehand and after, but usually when people reference the shema, it’s those six words.
    • when you say the shema, you’re supposed to close your eyes and cover your eyes with your right hand when you recite it. the idea is that you are blocking out everything around you for a moment of total intentionality
  • morning: modeh ani 
    • “Modeh anee lefanecha melech chai vekayam, she-he-chezarta bee nishmatee b’chemla, raba emunatecha
    • popular prayer to say when you wake up
  • night: most people say the shema from what I know but here are some other prayers you can say 
  • the amidah is a major prayer, part of most services. you can also say it alone. it’s a long one and it took me a while to be familiar with. 
  • an easy quick prayer is oseh shalom
    • “oseh shalom bim-ro-mav, hu-ya-seh shalom, aleinu va-a-kol yisrael, vi-mi-ru, a-men.” 
    • He who makes peace in his high places
      He shall make peace upon us
      And upon all of Israel
      And say Amen

keeping kosher:

  • there are literally a million different ways to keep kosher
  • people will argue that halachically (according to Jewish law) it’s more black and white, but in reality, Jews keep kosher in lots of different ways
  • some ways people keep kosher:
    • not at all. eat anything with anything whenever.
    • will mix meat and dairy, but will only eat kosher animals.
    • will only eat kosher animals but will eat food without a hechsher
    • will eat dairy/vegetarian in restaurants and buy kosher meat
    • will only eat packaged goods with a hechsher, buy kosher meat and separates meat and dairy
    • there’s a lot more combinations 
  • my personal rules for keeping kosher:
    • I’m vegetarian so kosher meat isn’t an issue. I’ve never eaten meat or fish so transitioning to a kosher lifestyle wasn’t that hard.
    • I only eat hechshered packaged food, even when travelling
    • I eat kosher whenever possible - on an airplane, in Israel, etc.
    • I eat dairy in restaurants, but eat at kosher restaurants when possible
  • when I was in high school, I was a lot stricter and didn’t eat out a lot or drink Starbucks because I wasn’t sure it could be kosher, but then I just sort of forgot about that rule and ate whatever I wanted
  • if you’re going to keep kosher, it’s important to understand the halacha (Jewish law) behind each of the rules (mixing meat and dairy, kosher certifications, not eating certain animals, etc.)
  • personally, I like keeping kosher because it’s a way for me to connect my body to Judaism, whereas a lot of the mitzvot (commandments) engage my mind more. I like the tradition. I like supporting Jewish-owned businesses. I also think that halacha is binding to an extent, so that’s why I do it. 
  • here’s a pretty good breakdown of the rules of kashrut


when taking on mitzvot and adapting practices, it’s important to keep in mind what kind of community you want to be a part of. granted, this can change. your practice will change and evolve over time based on different things - where you’re living, who you’re friends with, etc. for example, I dated a shomer shabbos guy my freshman year of college, and I remember thinking, “wow, I could never do that.” I was shomer shabbos a year later.

even your movement affiliation/where you feel at home will change. when I was your age, I was convinced I was going to do a reform conversion. I didn’t see Jewish law as binding. I saw it as medieval, but I thought values and tradition were still relevant. then, I moved to Chicago for college, and there was a structured conversion program at a Conservative synagogue. fast forward, I liked the Conservative synagogue, Jewish law became more relevant, and now I belong to a Conservative synagogue and regularly pray at a post-denominational minyan, too. however, some of my friends from Hillel are way more reform, so I find myself bending rules and using leniencies when possible so I can be comfortable around them.

sorry this was so long. please let me know if you have more questions!

The holidays are stressing me out in more than the usual yontiff way. I’m probably going to spend Rosh Hashana with my usual synagogue, but I want to observe two days and they’re Reform and only do one, so I want to go to Chabad (which might be the only one doing a second day anyway, not sure, does conservative do that?) for the second day and also for Yom Kippur, because I am definitely not driving on Yom Kippur – not just because I don’t like driving on holidays, but because I do not handle fasting well and it’s very unsafe to drive 20 miles each way in that condition. But I’m really stressing out about the mechitza issue. I’m living as a girl mostly now, but the people there still know me as a guy and I don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable by being on the women’s side if they think I’m a guy, but it also would be inappropriate for me to be on the men’s side since I’m living as a woman now elsewhere. I think the students for the most part would be ok with it, but I have some non-student friends who are frum and I don’t think they’d take it well, and I don’t want to be the reason people are uncomfortable. But at the same time, I have to do what’s right, don’t I?

It’s just so frustrating to not know what to do because I’m just trying to be true and it’s on the side of Torah observance and yet I know that probably a lot of people would assume the case was the opposite of what it is and would treat me like I was doing something contrary to halacha and I just feel like there’s brick walls whichever way I turn and I don’t even know what way is up except to trust that I’m going in the direction of Torah but it feels so complicated

It would have been easier of course to just wait until after I graduated, but once I decided, I had to. It felt like I was lying.

I messaged the rabbi to ask him what I should do, but he’s super busy obviously so I don’t know if he’ll see my message today so I’m just gonna sit here and be stressed out until I hear back and probably after as well because that’s just who I am :(

  • me: okay, brain, I need a new writing project to start working on.
  • me: something short, with a character I haven't done much with before. Youmu, maybe
  • me: what do you have for me?
  • brain: um
  • brain: hmmm
  • brain: Okay, so, one day Yuyuko notices that a ghost disappeared from the Netherworld without going through any of the official channels, and when she sends Youmu to investigate, there's evidence that he was abducted and dragged off to another afterlife. Youmu chases after the kidnappers, and after Komachi ferries her across the Sanzu, she just kind of tags along because this is definitely more interesting than anything else she's got going on. Once they're over there, things just get more fucked up, as it becomes pretty obvious that whoever they're chasing commands a lot of power in the afterlife, so it sorta develops a Cold War spy thriller vibe. Surprise, it turns out to be Hecatia, who wanted the soul of Junko's dead son as part of rehabilitating her, and ghostnapped him because that isn't exactly kosher, so going through the proper procedures would raise a lot of red flags.
  • me: okay
  • me: like
  • me: what the actual fuck

I vow to get my shit together with my tags tomorrow while at work. I’m still not entirely comfortable with this laptop yet, so i’ll  do it much easier on my desktop at work. also, tomorrow is FRIDAY. Thank god.

 Also, tomorrow the boys will be beginning their fast for Yom Kippur. While Beth is also Jewish, she is not nearly as committed to it as they are. As stated (somewhere) in her headcanons, she’s generally in it for the sake of her parents. Although, last year she did fast because she was actually with her parents, so i’m sure in some verses she will be?? But anyway, Aaron isn’t going to be very happy and David will not be very nice. Probably. Jamie will probably sneak doritos when nobody is looking.