so much more holiday movies but this is the last one

Dan and Phil’s Liveshow // 4.27.17

First liveshow in the new house

Dan is wearing the pink Sydney shirt

Phil is wearing a new grey/blue/green? hoodie 

Random box of shit that they went through

Many box paper cuts

Moving video recap

The London Apartment was like the F.R.I.E.N.D.S apartment

They’re still going to be making videos and they brought their stuff no need to fret

The new house is a duplex

They’re still renting RIP to the dog dreams for now

They’re drowning in cardboard boxes

There’s a semi transparent glass door in the lounge

Easter baking (Phil still doesn’t know what they’re called)

“Whisk it harder” -Phil

Phil’s bedroom is going to be pretty much the same don’t get too hyped about new interior design

Dan’s bedroom will be almost completely different (apparently it looks like the moon?)

Dan got rid of the bedspread but Phil kept his (he secretly has 2 the entire time)

They are yet to meet the neighbor

“’When will you get a dog?’ I guess when the house is bought and there’s no landlord.”

The gaming background will look weirdly similar 

“Gaming lighting will be dank”

Dan’s filming area is through the door thing through the longue 

Dan didn’t want to play i spy on the flight back from Singapore what a bitch

They watched Fantastic Beasts (3/5 stars), Lion (ugly crying), Hacksaw Ridge (Dan cried the entire second half of the movie) on the flight 

They went to a night zoo in Singapore which was really cool

Phil was convinced an elephant was trying to come after him

Dan wanted to see absolutely everything 

They haven’t listened to the new Fall Out Boy song yet

They’re enjoying the new place a lot just getting adjusted 

Phil will still film in his bedroom (apparently the landlord thought he was going to film a porno)

They have a Lounge and a chill lounge (currently they’re in the chill lounge which is where they’ll film)

Dan got a white piano

Phil is constantly taking creepshots

Maybe they’ll get a fish

The Art Science Museum in Singapore was lit 

Phil the Photographer

Phil’s hood has gone up #news

Dan did a lot of crying on that trip

Basically Singapore was just really cool

Dan stuck his foot through the leg of the ripped jeans

“What is it with Australia inspiring me to paint my nails” 

#cocktus 

Phil may attempt to curl his hair for a video at some point

Phil will be away in Florida after Playlist with his family on holiday so he’ll tweet about when he’ll do the next liveshow

The 1D poster is gone #rip

The last gaming video was a good send off

This year is very much about them and their lives

Dan got a bonsai for is desk

Dan has one more dinof video filmed in the old house 

This one isn’t a forever home

“You sneaky weasels” 

“It suits him. Embrace the natural curls.” Phil on Dan’s curls

The new place doesn’t really have a name but Thor is a possibility

Phil probably wouldn’t paint his nails because he doesn’t like having stuff on his (like tattoos or pen marks) just as a personal preference 

DINOF video most likely on Monday and Dan liveshow on Tuesday

“We hope that we’re been two virtual buddies to you”

“Goodbyeeeeeee”

101 fluffy prompts
  • FALLING IN LOVE
  • 001: "You're really soft."
  • 002: "You smell nice."
  • 003: "I'm here for my daily fix of hugs and kisses."
  • 004: "Is it possible to love too much?"
  • 005: "I don't wanna get up-- you're comfy."
  • 006: "I will always be there protect you."
  • 007: "I'm cold. Come closer."
  • 008: "I love you a lot, but please stop trying to cook me dinner, you suck.”
  • 009: "The stars look especially lovely tonight."
  • 010: "I've never seen such gorgeous eyes before."
  • 011: "May I have this dance?"
  • 012: "I can't stop thinking about you."
  • 013: "You'll never feel alone with me by your side."
  • 014: "Let's get to know each other over dinner."
  • 015: "All I want is you."
  • 016: "I could never leave you, I love you too much!"
  • 017: "A fairytale with a happy ending always brings a smile to my face."
  • 018: "I want to hear you sing."
  • 019: "I don't think anyone could ever be as lovely as you."
  • 020: "You look incredible in that."
  • 021: "He/She's quite stunning, isn't he/she?"
  • 022: "Sometimes I just can't control myself when around you."
  • 023: "Do you believe in love at first sight?"
  • 024: "I think I'm in love."
  • 025: "I’d like it if you stayed.
  • 026: "People are jerks, but not you."
  • 027: "I'll share the blankets with you."
  • 028: "I have never felt this way about anyone."
  • 029: "I want this to never end..."
  • 030: "Can I kiss you?"
  • LIVING TOGETHER
  • 031: "I waxed the floors, grab your fluffy socks."
  • 032: "Who changed the thermostat settings? I’m freezing to death."
  • 033: "Can we just watch a movie and fall asleep on the couch?"
  • 034: "You can put your cold feet on me."
  • 035: "Your stray red item turned my whites pink."
  • 036: "A thunderstorm is rolling through town and you’re scared of lightening/thunder so I’ll protect you."
  • 037: "There was a power outage and now we have to have dinner by candlelight."
  • 038: "Rock Paper Scissors to see who has to go talk to the neighbors upstairs for being too loud."
  • 039: "I just came home to you crying while watching a movie, please tell me what’s going on."
  • 040: "Our AC is out and it’s the middle of the summer."
  • 041: "You found me crying on the kitchen floor in the middle of the night surrounded by a shattered jelly jar."
  • 042: "My parents are coming over in 10 minutes so please put some clothes on"
  • 043: "We’re repainting the apartment and going to the hardware store together to pick out color swatches."
  • 044: "IF YOU USE UP ALL THE HOT WATER ONE MORE TIME IM GOING TO BAN YOU TO THE COUCH FOR A MONTH."
  • 045: "We’re watching Toy Story 3 and we can’t stop crying."
  • WEDDINGS/PROPOSALS
  • 046: "I caught the bouquet"
  • 047: "My ex just invited me to their wedding and I need you to be my date so it doesn’t look like I’ve spent the last few years failing to get over them."
  • 048: "We accidentally got married in Vegas oops"
  • 049: "I’m really drunk, please help me get safely out of the way so I don’t ruin our friend’s wedding."
  • 050: "I planned out this super romantic proposal and you just ruined it by beating me to whole proposing thing."
  • 051: "I wasn’t planning on asking you, but it appeared to me that life is short. Will you marry me? "
  • 052: "If you shove cake in my face this will be the worst wedding night of your life."
  • 053: "Do you take this man/woman to be your lawfully wedded husband/wife? "
  • 054: "May I have this dance, wife/husband? "
  • 055: "You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I’m so happy I can finally call you my wife/husband."
  • 056: "I jokingly told you that the only way I’d marry you was if you did this weird outlandish thing, and you actually did it, and I’m kind of charmed."
  • 057: "This is probably a bad time, but marry me?"
  • MARRIED LIFE
  • 058: "We’ve become the clingy newlyweds you always complained about. "
  • 059: "Your ‘miracle hangover cure’ couldn’t possibly beat mine."
  • 060: "I know you haven’t had the best experience with dogs in the past but look at its face please please can we keep it?"
  • 061: "I wanted to surprise you for our anniversary, but everything that could go wrong, did go wrong."
  • 062: "I beat you at Mario Kart and now you're banishing me to the couch for the night?”
  • 063: "I surprised you with tickets to see our favorite band… WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU SURPRISED ME WITH TICKETS TO SEE THEM TOO?"
  • 064: "I know we had a big fight but we still need to decorate the house for the holidays."
  • 065: "Oh! Hey! Could you come and taste this to see if it's okay?"
  • 066: "We’re arguing over book versus movie."
  • 067: "I came home to a Nerf gun on the front porch and a note that says ‘Here is your weapon. I have one too. Loser cooks dinner. Good luck. xo’"
  • 068: "We’ve been celebrating our wedding anniversary on the wrong day for the past nine years."
  • 069: "You had a business trip and I missed you so much that I kind of tore up the house in your absence like a dog with separation anxiety… sorry?"
  • 070: "We both have nowhere else to be so we get to spend our rare day off at home."
  • PREGNANCY
  • 071: "I bet it’s a girl/boy."
  • 072: "Do you think it’s possible that I…might be… pregnant? "
  • 073: "I thought I was pregnant but the test must have been wrong. I’m not. "
  • 074: "You’re lucky I’m pregnant!"
  • 075: "Can you help me up, your child is pretty heavy."
  • 076: "I could really use a foot rub right now."
  • 077: "Your dad is really excited to meet you soon, it’s driving me crazy."
  • 078: "Do you wanna know the sex of the baby?"
  • 079: "The baby’s kicks are keeping me up at night."
  • 080: "Did you feel that?"
  • 081: "I can’t fit into my favorite dress anymore. "
  • 082: "OH MY GOD I’M GOING INTO LABOR. WHAT DO WE DO NOW?!
  • 083: "I can’t be pregnant… or….OH MY GOD! "
  • 084: "I think you might be pregnant.”
  • 085: "It’s 2 am but you’re craving cake and we’re both up anyway so let’s bake in our underwear."
  • PARENTING
  • 086: "I knew it was a mistake to get the twins matching clothes."
  • 087: "Sh…they’re asleep."
  • 088: "I think someone had a little accident with the finger paint."
  • 089: "Mondays are your diaper days."
  • 090: "Our kid is totally the one who wanted to build a pillow fort, not me."
  • 091: "Ooh…someone’s got a tummy ache."
  • 092: "Are you sure you don’t want me to drop them off myself? I don’t think you could handle seeing them off alone."
  • 093: "I told you we should have just gotten that German Shepherd puppy."
  • 094: "What do you think for their punishment? Grounding? No video games? No going out for a week?"
  • 095: "Mm…your kid before five in the morning."
  • 096: "Come on now, I think you’re being too harsh. He/she’s just a kid. Remember all of the stupid things we used to do when we were their age?"
  • 097: "So, how should we break the news that they’re going to have a new baby brother or sister?"
  • 098: "I think we should have another."
  • 099: "Why wasn’t I invited to your wedding?"
  • 100: "Okay fine, one more story, but then you really have to go to bed."
  • 101: "…They just grow up so fast."
Negotiations

I walked into the room, avoiding direct eye contact with the alien waiting for me. Its huge eyes just looked like a jet black sclera set in a sack of vaguely damp, wrinkled gray leather. If eyes are a window into the soul, this creepy little guy would give satan a run for his money. They just put me on edge, somehow. I’d have to make eye contact anyway, but it could wait.

I strode up to the meeting table, pulled out the chair, and sat down. I shuffled around in my bag for a moment before pulling out a small piece of tech, which I set on the table in front of me.

“Before we begin, I want to be sure of a few things. This device you’ve provided us with, it is 100% effective at understanding and translating languages, correct?”

The alien across from me nodded. It’s a nice little allowance they’ve made for comfort, learning our body language, but its bulbous head threw the whole gesture off. It made me think of one of those old inflatable toys with a weight on the bottom, that would lean too far to the side before bouncing straight back up. Woobles or something. It didn’t really matter.

“Nearly. We occasionally find a race with one or two concepts that it has trouble with, but that’s easily smoothed over.”

I took a deep breath, and waited a moment to compose myself. This whole thing was going to be more trying than not interrupting old man Higgins up the street while he went on about whatever racist sentiment was in his head at the moment.

“One or two…okay. That’s odd.”

The alien blinked. Eyelids came in from not just the top and bottom, but also the sides. That’s just plain creepy. Reminds me of one of those really old movies they threw on the media blacklist pretty much as soon as first contact started. Something in black. Whatever it was, I remember seeing it as a kid, and that guy at the beginning had nothing on this alien’s eyes.

“Have you already found something it can’t translate?”

I nodded, then pulled out my communicator and scrolled through a few documents. I really needed to clean this thing out. Can’t believe I didn’t get around to it before coming to such an important meeting. Imagine the debacle that would result if I opened exactly the wrong thing. Never can know what that might be, honestly.

“Of a sort, yes. Mind humoring me for a few minutes?”

The alien steepled its hands together, and leaned forward. That’s just plain creepy. I wonder how they learned such context specific body language? Not that it really matters, I guess. Not my problem.

“Certainly. After all, it can take years to accept a race into the Federation.”

Nodding again, I pulled up a document on my communicator, then leaned back in my chair as I began. This was going to be more interesting than that time your classmate Jimmy found some old matches somewhere and almost burned the school down by mistake.

“Excellent. This shouldn’t take much time. I mentioned that we found some issues with your device. Allow me to demonstrate: Espionage.”

The little device on the table beeped, and a red light flashed.

“ERROR: NO ANALOGUE FOUND”

I sighed. That one had been an accident. We just had the thing sitting in a conference room while we discussed the implications of the visit when it came up. But, when something that simple for us to understand came up, we had to try for more.

“Reverse Engineering.”

Again, a beep and a flash of red.

“ERROR: NO ANALOGUE FOUND”

“Spycraft.”

And again with the beep. This was going to get irritating if I didn’t speed things up a bit. Too bad we hadn’t managed to find a mute option for that feature.

“ERROR: NO ANALOGUE FO-”

“Overwhelming Force”

“ERROR: NO-”

“Scorched Earth”

“ER-”

“Kamikaze”

“E-”

Blitzkrieg, Stealth, Mutually Assured Destruction, Acceptable Losses, Pyrrhic Victory, Guerilla Warfare, Encirclement, Entrenchment, Siege.”

The device gave off a series of distressed beeps, punctuated by rapid blinking of the little red light. I almost felt sorry for it. Almost.

“TOO MANY ERRORS DETECTED. REBOOTING. RUNNING SELF DIAGNOSTIC. NO DISCREPANCIES FOUND,”

I paused, and glanced across the table at the alien before looking back down at the translator. This was going to hit it harder than a washed up holovid actor with no auditions and less money hits rock bottom.

“Xenocide”

The chair across from me clattered to the ground as the alien practically fell out of its seat. I don’t blame the poor thing. Of all the aggressive, militaristic words we tried, that was one of the ones we least expected to translate. I mean, really. Who has a word for the intentional extermination of an entire sapient species when they don’t even understand fundamental hostile international mechanics like spying?

“Why do you have a word for…what was all that just now?”

I chuckled a bit while motioning for the alien to sit back down. His reaction had been pretty good, perfectly suitable for one of those hammed-up old dramas where the hero realizes they’ve been working with the villain all along.

“We were confused about that too. So we took a look at the information you sent as part of first contact with us. We noticed something interesting. Every single race in your Federation is carnivorous. Why is that?”

The alien seemed smaller somehow as it settled back into a seat. It looked kind of like a balloon slowly losing air, if that balloon was made of moldering gray leather with eyes that made your spinal column decide it wanted a holiday in Fiji.

“First contact has always been made after sapient races make it to multiple worlds. We’ve never found a sapient herbivorous race which failed to destroy themselves in resource wars and aggressive action. We’ve never found herbivores capable of surviving long enough to leave their own world.”

I leaned forward in the chair and smiled while finally making direct eye contact with the alien. I think the poor thing shivered when I did that. Not that I blame it. Imagine your reaction when you start to put the pieces together and realize that your friendly, upstanding next door neighbor might be the world’s most wanted criminal.

“And the races you have found, while commonly using threat displays, do not waste resources on wars they cannot easily win, correct?”

The alien nodded as it slouched a bit in its chair. It looked kind of like it was trying to hide. Who wouldn’t want to hide from the monsters in their closet?

“Wasted resources means decreased likelihood of survival.”

I shrugged. That was true enough, though rather coldly logical. Dispassionate logic like that has never been our strong suit. Then again, that’s why I’m in this situation in the first place, so it evens out.

“And yet herbivores constantly waste resources on aggression, on movement, on having more young than will possibly survive.”

The alien was staring at me. I’m not sure when the last time it blinked was. I wonder if those eyes need some kind of lubrication to keep from drying out. Probably, they looked a bit less creepy than they should’ve. Looked like they were losing their shine.

“And they die for it. That’s exactly why we’ve never encountered spacefaring herbivores. Their inherent aggression is their own demise.”

I held eye contact. I’d almost swear the alien was a weird statue right now. Don’t know who would commission a statue made of old greasy leather, but I’m sure there’s someone with too much money and too little sense who would give it a shot.

“Indeed. Now, back to the subject at hand. I’ll ask you before we continue: what can you offer humans for joining your Federation?”

The alien sputtered as it started moving again. I’d swear it looked offended. Maybe it doesn’t see where this is going. Not that it really matters, I guess. I mean, it probably matters about as much as posting a formal complaint to a new corporate policy, which is to say not at all.

“We’ve already sent the offer. You’ve seen that, I’m sure.”

I nodded, and began to tap out a staccato rhythm on the table with my fingers. I never could remember where I learned this stupid tune. I’ve known it as long as I can remember, and it just moves into my head on occasion and sticks around like that one couchsurfing friend who doesn’t understand the idea of wearing out their welcome.

“And I’m asking, what else do you have to offer?”

The alien just shook its head again, staring at the device. I wonder if it thought we might’ve tampered with it. As if we knew how. That little thing is way beyond our current abilities. We had some scientists pry it open and look inside, just to be sure.

“Nothing. I’m not sure why you’re-”

I raised my hand, cutting him off. Huh. Not sure why that worked. Did they learn that much of our body language? That’s still really creepy, if it’s the case. Or, maybe I just have it on edge. I dunno. I guess it doesn’t matter.

“May I have permission to connect my datapad with my ship’s computers?”

The alien glanced away from me for a moment. I assume it was checking in with superiors somehow. Maybe it was psychic, to an extent. Or maybe they just had an implant of some sort. We’ll find out eventually, I’m sure.

“Yes, if you like.”

I sighed. I guess that makes things easier for us. I don’t think anyone was going to like what I was about to do. This whole thing felt kind of like one of those holovids of an accident, where you know what’s coming and don’t want to keep going, but for some reason you just can’t seem to stop and pull yourself away.

“Computer, show video: Hiroshima”

A screen appeared in the air above my datapad. It started playing back an old, grainy video. Shaky, taken by hand in an aircraft in a firefight. Below, you can barely see a city being blotted out by a massive explosion. A cloud of smoke, fire and debris was rapidly climbing into the sky, billowing, growing, blooming into an eerie and easily recognized mushroom cloud.

“That’s…you’re using weapons of that scale on a population center? How recent was this?”

I shrugged, and closed the video. The screen on my datapad went back to the document I had up earlier. Gotta love how well they managed to predict this whole thing. I made a mental note to recommend a raise for whoever set up that document for me.

“Three centuries ago. Prior to our invention of spaceflight. Part of a much larger conflict. This is a relatively minor example of “overwhelming force”“

“ERROR: NO A-”

“Shut it. Computer, show infosheet: Battle of Stalingrad.”

A series of graphs and diagrams appeared above my datapad. They showed resources, time, maps, battle plans, and death tolls. Images were interspersed throughout, as were annotations on the tactical value of this, the emotional value of that. Prominent among them was a single apartment building, including notes on sniping from the roof and support via tunnels.

“That…what purpose would that…why w-”

Again, I raised my hand to cut him off, before closing the infosheet. Maybe it was both. Nah, couldn’t be. Only way it was both having this guy on edge and our body language is if it somehow had our body language built in. Unsettling thought, but not exactly likely.

“Because Stalingrad was an advantageous location and the people who died there were considered ‘Acceptable losses’“

“ERRO-”

“Computer, show gallery: General Sherman’s March to the Sea.”

A multitude of images appeared over the datapad. Rail lines and roads intentionally broken and destroyed. Farms and fields scoured clean and left to fallow. Buildings and towns razed to the ground. A broken people left to mourn and starve.

“So much waste…that can’t be intentional, can it?”

I glanced at the images, the wanton destruction that campaign caused, and the very orders that caused it. That kind of thing may be considered morally reprehensible now, even a war crime, but it wasn’t always. At the time, the strategy was extolled as one of the reasons the war ended the way it did.

“It was intentional.”

The alien stared at me, its reflective black eyes bigger than I’d ever seen them before. Creepy as all hell, that’s for sure. I’d rather not deal with these kinds of meetings in the future. Maybe after this I could negotiate for some kind of retirement.

“But…why?”

I tapped my datapad and closed the gallery, then leaned back and tossed my feet on the table. May as well relax, I already knew how this was going to end.

“Because it rendered the enemy unable to use resources Sherman couldn’t keep. Computer, assemble and show video grouping: RTS Games”

A large grid of videos came up, showing a huge range of scenes. Largely battle, the settings varied from open space to deep ocean, from early history to the far “future.” Even battles across space and time could be seen.

“The translator can’t have gotten that right. Those are military tactical simulations. Higher level than anything I’ve ever seen or heard of.”

I laughed as I closed out all of the videos and turned back to the alien. Creepy and unsettling as it might be, I’m pretty sure I was terrifying the poor thing. Not that I really felt sorry for it. Not at all.

“No. They aren’t. Those are games. Toys. For. Fun. And they’re a couple hundred years out of date. From what I’ve seen, nearly every human capable of coherent speech is capable of tactically overwhelming your Federation. And since we’re already here, in space, it’s too late for you to say no. So, I’ll ask again:

What do you have to offer us?”

anonymous asked:

Hello! These blogs are so super helpful, and yours is here just in time for me to begin writing my story! So thank you so much for your help in advance. I'm writing a story about a soldier that was captured during war. Part of the story is him struggling to trust his therapist enough to open up about what happened. During this time where he refuses to talk to anyone, how would PTSD affect his everyday actions, his thoughts, etc.? Thank you so much. I really appreciate it. Have a great weekend!!!

Hooboy. I’m going to just list several symptoms of PTSD and explain how they would each drain his energy and limit his ability to do things and how to include these in your writing. 

1. Hyper-Arousal

  • Hyper-vigilance: Every little sound and shadow is going to make his brain go into overdrive. It is going to kick his fight-or-flight mode on high and its almost never going to calm down. This is EXTREMELY draining. His brain and body is going to be a coiled spring, ready for danger, at all times. This is physically exhausting and drains spoons incredibly quickly. 
    • Some ways this will change his daily life - he won’t be able to spend as much time in crowds or even just outside his house because there is too much stimulation for him to handle for to long. He probably won’t sleep well because again, all those little noises houses make at night is going to make him panic and lose more spoons - he could combat this by getting a white noise machine. 
  • Emotional Outbursts: Many individuals with PTSD may experience unstable emotional states. 
    • It wouldn’t be odd for him to suddenly feel very angry or irritable with no recognizable reason or target. He may also swing the other way and start crying without any warning. These episodes are extremely draining and there frequency may prevent your character from getting things done. 
  • Lack of Concentration: High levels of distraction, the hyper-vigilance, the adrenaline constantly running through his body is going to make if difficult for your character to concentration for an extended period of time.
    • This lack of concentration may make it difficult for your character to work, attend school, do homework or fill out things like medical forms for doctors appointments. This could lead to him pushing such appointments back because he is unable to prepare for them.

2. Avoidance 

  • Situational Avoidance: Your character is going to try to avoid any situation that might remind him of his trauma.
    • If he was in a tank that was bombed, he may go out of his way to avoid driving. If something happened in a wooded area, he may take a longer route to avoid a similar area because it reminds him of his trauma. This could make your character miss deadlines, appointment times, or cause a significant amount of time to be dedicated to this avoidance which means other things will not get done. 
  • Social Isolation: Another type of avoidance is social avoidance - this means your character may avoid his family and friends, either because he doesn’t have the energy to be social or being around other people cause him to panic. Being forced into these situations would drain his energy very quickly.
    • This may cause him to avoid things like birthday celebrations, holiday parties, any type of gathering. These events are going to be extremely exhausting as your character is already tired and the amount of people and noise are going to exhaust him. 
    • Something else that might influence his social isolation is his PTSD influencing his view of other people - he may begin to mistrust others and feel as if the world is a dangerous place. This mindset is extraordinarily draining and would significantly impact his energy levels. 
  • Triggers: Triggers are sights, sounds, smells, situations, items; pretty much anything that reminds your character of his trauma. 
    • Before he is aware of his triggers, he will most likely stumble upon many of them and suffer from flashbacks or anxiety attacks, which is extremely exhausting.
    • When he knows his triggers, he is going to try his best to avoid them, which may mean changing his routine, getting up earlier to go shopping when it is quieter, not going to fun events like fairs or the movies because he doesn’t want to fun into a trigger. 
    • Triggers are often unavoidable or unexpected, prompting exhausting anxiety attacks or flashbacks multiple times a day, eating up time to get things done and exhausting your character.
      • Consider what his trauma consists of - does it involve guns? If so, it might not be just real guns that can trigger an anxiety attack or flashback. Plastic guns, guns in movies or TV shows, sounds that are similar like a car backfiring or fireworks, the smell of gunpowder, even just something that shoots something, like a Nerf Gun. Think through his potential triggers and then think about all the situations those could be found in - he is going to have to schedule his entire day around avoiding these triggers, especially when he is not actively working with his therapist on his trauma at this point.

3. Flashbacks/Remembering the Trauma

  • Nightmares: When he does fall asleep, he is most likely going to have nightmares. 
    • He may or may not remember the specifics of the nightmare, but he will most likely wake up in a panic, shaking, sweating. It’s going to take him a long time to fall back to sleep, if he even does. If he does fall back to sleep, it may be a very tense sleep, waking up frequently and not allowing his body to relax - this means he is going to wake up in the morning already exhausted, anxious, and running on panic. 
  • Flashbacks: Flashbacks are often one of the stereotypical symptoms of PTSD, however they are extremely common. Flashbacks may happen multiple times a day, at varying severity each time. 
    • One type of flashback is an emotional flashback - these flashbacks only affect the individuals emotional state, not their senses. So if your character is triggered and reminded of his trauma, his emotional state may quickly move to match the emotional state during the trauma - so intense fear, adrenaline, anger, sadness. These intense episodes that may come at anytime, last up to an hour, and are extremely exhausting. 
    • The common type of flashbacks you see in media are sometimes called ‘full flashbacks’ or ‘psychological flashbacks’. This is when the brain believes that it is back during the traumatic event, and the individuals senses - sight, hearing, smell, taste - are going to be taken back to the moment of the trauma. Your character will not be fully in reality at the time and any attempts to touch or otherwise break the individual out of the flashback could result in a negative or fearful reaction. These flashbacks can also last a significant amount of time and be draining. 

Now, you said that this was before your character began working with his therapist, but these symptoms won’t go away suddenly. As your character begins to work through his trauma and develop coping skills, these symptoms may decrease in severity or disappear all together eventually. However, some PTSD sufferers will always have some of these symptoms and have to cope with them. 

I hope this helps!

- Mod Riley

dating Bucky Barnes...
  • he’s definitely really hesitant around you at first because this is all so new to him and he doesn’t wanna fuck it up
  • he ends up pushing you away as a defence mechanism 
  • you’re not upset though, you understand and give him a little room
  • then one day it’s just you and him in the tower
  • so you decide to watch a movie (he let’s you pick)
  • so you go with Titanic because a) it’s a classic and b) he’d never seen it 
  • there’s subtle touches 
    • like his hand grazing yours in the popcorn bowl
    • or his side pressed against yours
    • he’ll definitely be paying more attention to you than the movie
  • that’s when he realises he’s in deep and you’re the only thing that matters to him 
  • he doesn’t even realise but he’s pulled you into his lap, crashing his lips onto yours

Keep reading

On Camera

Or that one time Lance decided to live-stream when he really should’ve been resting. The (established) klance YouTuber AU that no one asked for, but you’re all getting. Domestic klance sharing an apartment is my jam, and throwing a little angst in there is a bonus.

I’m actually really happy with this, and if people like it I might do an actual long AU thing with this setting, so feedback is appreciated! For now though, just a one-shot. This is also proof that the best writing for me happens at 3 AM… oops. I hope you enjoy!!

Psst @taylor-tut this is that thing I not-so-discreetly mentioned in my tags, have a wonderful day.


Lance McClain was a rulebreaker in every way, except for one thing. He believed it was always necessary to have a routine, and never stray from it. If asked, he’d inform you that a steady routine was the foundation for a steady life.

Showering every morning, brushing his teeth every night, thinking of a cheesy one-liner for Keith each day without fail, the list went on. Little things.

One of his many routines was to live-stream, always on Sundays. Because who did anything besides sit at home, definitely not with a hangover, on Sunday?

New videos went up on Wednesdays, but the carefully edited ones on YouTube and his live-streams were very different. Many fans even preferred seeing him live, mainly because he couldn’t stop himself from making bad jokes, and was usually too lazy to straighten his bedhead.

And they would always ask him to go bother Keith in the next room, which Lance more often than not was obliged to do.

So when he woke up late one Sunday with a killer headache and a stuffy nose, Lance wasn’t about to let it get in the way of his routine.

He discovered a note from Keith on the kitchen table that said he’d be out running errands, and Lance lamented that he hadn’t been awake to tell Keith to get soup. After shooting him a quick text, the only response Lance got was “You don’t even like soup.”

Lance chuckled softly, which quickly led to a series of wet coughs. Clearing his throat, he began to set up his camera, wrapped himself up in blankets, and started the stream.

“Hey guys,” he said with a small wave, and winced at how raspy his voice sounded. He sniffled, and edged the off-screen box of tissues closer to him.

The chat was quickly flooded with “HELLO”’s and “LANCE!”’s. By now, all the fans knew when he went live. Lance was, however, surprised to see several inquiries about his health.

There were quite a few “Are you okay”’s, and even some “You seem sick”’s, with one of Lance’s personal favorites being “You look like shit.”

He read off the last comment with a short laugh. “Thanks, KeiththeKutie05.” Then, as an afterthought, he added, “Nice name.”

After a short pause of him continuing to scan the chat, he spoke again. “I’m fine though, just got a cold or something. Nothing could stop me from live-streaming!”

As the viewers seemed satisfied with this response, Lance wasn’t surprised to see the usual repetition of “Where’s Keith?” in the chat. He sighed.

“Mullet Boy is running errands,” Lance told them, rolling his eyes for effect. “Probably going out to buy a new pair of fingerless gloves.”

Keith and Lance had been sharing an apartment for some time now, and the Internet was very invested in their relationship, or so it seemed. Keith was annoyed by the whole thing at first, but Lance found it entertaining that his fans seemed to like Keith better than him. Lance could, admittedly, relate.

Eventually, the accidental publicity that came with dating a YouTuber inspired Lance to make a collab channel for them, though Keith never got his own. He insisted that he was too awkward to film anything by himself, which Lance secretly found adorable.

Numerous people began telling Lance to prank Keith when he came back, to which Lance grinned. Playing tricks on Keith during live-streams had become somewhat of a tradition in and of itself. “Maybe I will,” Lance tapped his chin thoughtfully. “You guys got any ideas?”

Lance read through some of the responses but saw nothing particularly appealing, then perked up at someone asking when he’d do a video with Hunk again.

“Actually, I got some good news for you guys,” Lance declared, sneezing into his elbow before continuing. “Hunk and I are going to be playing videogames on Pidge’s channel sometime next week, and Hunk has both of us coming over to his and Shay’s for a baking video. I haven’t decided what we should do for my part yet. Maybe a Q & A?”

Once again, Lance’s eyes scanned through the suggestions until his eyes snagged on one he liked. “Cards Against Humanity, huh? With YouTube’s shitty new rules it could get demonetized, but I do love that game, so why not? I’m positive Pidge owns it, and I can tell them to bring it over. Maybe I can even convince Keith to play with us.”

Lance couldn’t help but smile at the enthusiastic response that got.

“I think I’m going to get myself some more coffee,” Lance decided, looking down at the empty mug resting on a coaster. “Last night Keith made me watch this really scary movie, so I naturally had trouble falling asleep. Gotta have coffee to keep myself functioning. Do you guys prefer coffee or tea? Keith and I are both coffee people, but he likes his black. No sugar or anything, disgusting if you ask me.”

Lance almost regretted this comment as a war of opinions on black coffee slowly took over his computer screen.

“Well, anyway, I’m gonna go to the kitchen real quick. I’d bring my laptop but… I’d probably spill coffee on it, and we can’t have that.”

Lance stood, and was about to start towards the next room when his vision abruptly blurred and refocused. He knew immediately something was wrong.

His legs felt like jelly, and the room seemed to spin as he took a single step forward. Had he only been fine when he was sitting? Lance had half the mind to sit right back down, but his brain was growing muddled, and direction simply didn’t make sense.

Lance’s migraine flared abruptly in intensity, and then suddenly the wood floor was rushing up to meet him. Everything went dark.


Keith glanced at his phone as he moved around to the back of the car, where he’d stored the groceries, and had to repress a fond smile at the Twitter notification on the screen. Lance was, apparently, live-streaming. Keith thought he might actually miss his time-slot for once, but he figured by now he should be used to the Cuban boy’s dedication to routine.

Lance’s channel got some negative feedback from more ‘sophisticated’ YouTubers for being… all over the place. A dedicated beauty guru, or PrinceLotor as his channel was called, had dragged Lance on Twitter on more than one occasion.

Lance was anything but consistent when it came to videos. He did whatever he felt like doing that week, and the fans loved it. Sometimes he played songs on his guitar, sometimes he did prank-calls. He would film Q&A’s, or tell stories about all the interesting stuff that happened in his life— Lance’s bad luck was rather famous. He recommended TV shows, did hauls of what he got for holidays, vlogged on occasion when he went to stores, you name it.

But Lance’s favorite thing to do were collabs.

Hunk, an incredibly smart engineer, had a baking channel as a hobby, and Lance was his favorite assistant.

Pidge was a newer gaming channel, but their obsession with theorizing about the game’s lore while playing and busting other fan theories made them grow in popularity quickly. For two player games, Lance was ideal.

Allura was an extremely popular beauty channel, and Lance let her give him makeovers whenever she wanted to. Shiro could use extra actors in his short films.

And Keith… well, the two of them had a channel together that had no pattern whatsoever, much to Lance’s dislike. Absolutely spontaneous and random, usually doing things by popular fan request, like dancing or karaoke. And uploads were by no means regular.

Keith was surprised at how much he had started to enjoy it. Lance had been telling him he should start an art channel, with animations and speedpaints and the like, and Keith wasn’t… that opposed to the idea. It could be a useful source of income, to help with all the debt he would come into after graduating college. But he’d never tell Lance.

Without thinking too much of it, Keith swiped right across his screen, taking him to Lance’s tweet about the live-stream in order to like it. He was about to close his phone again and begin taking groceries up to their apartment when his eyes snagged on something odd.

Lots of the replies to Lance’s tweet mentioned him, particularly the recent ones, even tagging him in it. Keith couldn’t fathom why they would be talking about him if he wasn’t on the stream, unless Lance was complaining about him live again.

Keith bristled. Lance better not be still annoyed at him for the movie the last night. Signs wasn’t scary at all, and not even a real horror movie! Lance simply stated that ‘he didn’t mess with aliens.’

But when he looked at all the mentions, Keith felt his irritation give way to confusion, and then panic.

“KEITH GET TO UR APARTMENT”, “YOU BETTER GO CHECK ON LANCE”, “HOLY SHIT HES COLLAPSED KEITH HURRY YA ASS UP”, and the one that really sent Keith reeling “UH GUYS IS IT JUST ME OR DID WE WITNESS LANCE’S DEATH ON CAMERA?”

Keith slammed the trunk, all groceries forgotten as he sprinted into the apartment building and ran for the stairs. They only lived on the third floor, and he was not about to wait for the slow, crowded elevator.

He fumbled to fit his key in the lock and opened the door to the living room, only to spot the live-streaming set up, with no Lance. Keith rushed forward, but drew up short when he realized that Lance was in fact passed out on the floor in front of the couch.

“Oh my god— Lance!” Keith sank down beside him, turning his boyfriend over. “Lance, are you okay? Can you hear me?”

Lance’s eyes opened slowly, and Keith felt relief flood his system, despite the uncharacteristically pale skin. “K-Keith? Wha… I thought you were shopping?”

“I’m back,” Keith answered shortly, wincing as he pressed a hand onto Lance’s forehead. “Jeez, you’re on fire. Why didn’t you tell me you were this sick?!”

“Are you a fire?” Lance mumbled under his breath, and Keith furrowed his brows in confusion.

“What? No, Lance, I was saying you have a fever.”

“Because you’re hot and I want s'more,” Lance continued, as if he hadn’t heard him at all. Keith was suddenly painfully aware that the live-stream was still going, and that his face was even more flushed than Lance’s, and not because of a fever.

Keith glanced at the computer sitting on the coffee table briefly, noting that most of the chat was full of random keyboard smashing. He smiled apologetically. “At least he’s conscious,” he shrugged, hoisting Lance up off the floor and propping one of his arm’s around Keith’s shoulder. “I’m going to take this idiot to the hospital, he’s way too hot.”

“So you finally admitted it,” Lance’s voice was barely audible, and Keith glanced back down to see him grinning up at Keith tiredly.

“I meant your temperature, dumbass. Next time, tell me when you’re not feeling well.”

And with that, he shut off the stream.

Harry Fake Dates Kendall but is in Love With You

A/n: This is an updated version of an imagine I’ve previously uploaded. I know Hendall is so 2015. I get it.

Masterlist linked in bio.


The red wine leaves a particular stain on Harry’s lips that he hadn’t noticed until Kendall pointed it out to him.

“It looks like you’re wearing lipstick” she laughs, “I didn’t know you were going to dress up this much for the party.”

They are currently sat at his mum’s kitchen island, drinking red wine while munching on some chips left out for the guests. The house is filled with familiar faces, friends and family all throughout London coming together for Anne’s birthday celebration.

They hosted one every year for as long as Harry could remember, a time of year where nearly every one of his family members, including his step family, would unite. It was their favorite time of year, believe it or not. Despite all the excitement for the holidays, Anne’s birthday celebration was certainly something special.

It was Kendall’s first time attending, considering the fact that Harry had only really talked to her whenever he was assigned to be with her for publicity. It wasn’t always ideal, however, he built a stable friendship with her, so he didn’t mind the extra company with him from time to time.

She was invited last minute, of course, since his management called last night to ask if there was any way for them to be seen together. With Harry’s new movie coming out and his solo album just released a couple weeks ago, it was almost a given for him to be rumored with a girlfriend. That’s how it’s worked all throughout his career.

He normally wouldn’t have minded, however, this was the worst possible date for him to be with Kendall.

Because it’s Anne’s birthday party, this means that it’ll be the first time in one year that he’ll be seeing Y/n. They have been best friends since they were five years old, basically growing up in the same house as they went through school together. But as time went on, and as they both went to their separate ways, it was hard to keep in touch with each other all the time.

She remained in the small towns of London while Harry was traveling world wide, where his name became known everywhere as Y/n’s was only known through people she attended school with. Of course, they still talked, considering they both admitted to having more than friendship feelings, but their lives were busy in their own ways, preventing them from being more than what they wanted to be.

For the past couple months, Harry planned that this would be the day he’d finally move forward with Y/n. Or, at least attempt to. With the loss of her over the past year, it made Harry realize just how much he couldn’t imagine a life without her. It had been so long—too long, and he couldn’t stand how long he’s lived without keeping in touch with her.

But now, everything he planned for the two of them is becoming impossible. He can’t begin to imagine how Y/n would feel knowing he brought Kendall to his mum’s birthday party after they both confessed their love for each other. In all honesty, he wouldn’t blame her for giving up on him. He keeps doing this to her, even if it’s unintentional.

He watches around the kitchen at the guests he hasn’t seen in quite a while. His leg bounces with impatience when each new person walking in to attend the party isn’t Y/n. It’s been nearly an hour and has never been so late to anything before.

And as horrible as it sounds, he almost wishes she doesn’t come, just so that she can avoid the heartbreak that will come when she reunites with Kendall again.

“I’m sorry I’m late!”

Harry’s head whips around when he hears the voice he’s been deprived of for the past year. The first thing he notices are her lips, and the way they move around her words so softly. They’re slightly glazed with a lipgloss, painting her lips with a rosy shade of pink. They look so much fuller to him now, but he knows not a trace of them are artificial.  

His eyes only drift from the shape of her lips when her fingers reach to tuck loose pieces of hair behind her ear. It’s then he notices just how much shorter her hair has gotten. What was once so long and lank is now falling just above the shoulder, set in luscious curls he can only imagine twisting around his fingers.

His jaw goes slack when he sees the pale pink dress she’s wearing. It’s made from silk, the metallic fabric glowing with each step she takes. He gulps when he notices just how much the dress accentuates the curvature of her body and how much of her legs are put on display for him to see, and he can’t help but to wipe the sweat off his palms when he watches her greet his mother with a proper kiss on the cheek.

He notices that his eyes haven’t shut since he’s seen her, but he’s so completely intrigued by how much has changed in her. Something about her seems so much more real—so much more vibrant—and he can’t seem to stop himself from praising how time has done her so goddamn well.

“You never told me she was going to be here.“

His body jerks at Kendall’s sudden appearance, her body slowly occupying the seat next to his at the kitchen island. If it wasn’t for her, he swears he would have caught himself drooling.

“Didn’t think I had to,” he says with a shrug, “she’s been my best friend since we were five. She’s basically apart of this family, she wouldn’t have missed this for the world.”

Y/n hasn’t missed a single one of Anne’s birthday celebrations since she’s known Harry. Their bond is irreplaceable—so irreplaceable, in fact, that Anne has been convinced Y/n is a miracle for their family. She was there for them through all the troubled times; helping them through their hardships and family instabilities.

When Anne and her husband first got divorced, Harry and Y/n were seven. Harry didn’t understand much of what was happening, all he knew was that his mum and dad weren’t going to love each other anymore. He was hurting, even when Gemma was there to try and keep him together. He started to believe everything between his parents was a lie.

She understood the whole separation process. Her mum left her at a young age, leaving her alone with her father. They were close, of course, but she always missed having a mother figure in her life. It made her upset to know she could only listen to one voice in the house, but as she grew older, she accepted it more.

By the time she met Harry, he kept bringing her over to his house as the years went on. Anne was the closest she had to mother, and their bond became unbreakable by the time Y/n was a teenager. Nearly seven years of Y/n being like another member of the family, Y/n started buying Anne Mother’s Day cards.

So when Y/n watched her second family fall apart, along with Anne’s heart, and she was determined to patch them back together again. Even at her young age, she’d pick flowers from her garden and give them to Anne everyday after school. Y/n said they represented her, and how she felt being a woman with such love and beauty could die all too quickly. Harry never understood what it meant, but Y/n did, which is why she never stopped until she heard Anne laughing again.

She also started to draw pictures and write her letters, reminding her of how loved she was by everyone. As much as Anne was heartbroken during the time, she took the letters everywhere she went and kept every flower alive for as long as she possibly could. Anne would always tell Harry “That girl came into our lives for a reason, my love. She’s a special one, our little miracle, never let her go. You hear me?”

Harry didn’t understand what it truly meant to let someone go, but he did his best to do anything but that. And now, as Harry sits on his mother’s kitchen island and seeing Y/n for the first time in a year, he feels he’s done just that.

“Guess not.” Kendall mutters, taking her last sip of the red wine left in her glass. “She’s just so strange, I guess. I can barely hold a conversation with her without her making an excuse to leave.”

Kendall and Y/n never really got along, it was extremely noticeable to everyone who held a conversation with the both of them. They just don’t see things in the same light. Y/n is very outgoing and lively; an extreme extrovert that seeks adventure—and Kendall can’t stand it. She thinks Y/n does it for attention, especially because she’s remained a small town girl while being surrounded by well-known celebrities. And even though it may seem like Y/n likes the attention, that’s not her purpose. She gives all her attention to others, never to herself, and it has always been something Harry loved the most.

And when it comes to Y/n, Kendall was that one thing that was constantly in her way of Harry. No matter how many times Harry and Y/n discussed how there was something between them, Kendall always found her way back to haunt her. She was her worst goddamn nightmare. She was perfect for Harry in the public eye, and nothing made Y/n feel worse than knowing she’ll never be her type of perfect, especially when it came to Harry.

But Kendall doesn’t know that. All she knows is that Y/n is extremely stand-offish with her, and she’ll never understand why.

“She’s not used to our lives. It’s extremely difficult for her to understand how we live, you know? She’s normal.”

Kendall scoffs, eyes rolling around the room because she hates that word. She feels so divided, like she’s in a categorization in society and everything about it makes her teeth clench.

“We’re normal, too, you know. I don’t understand why she feels so intimated and feels like she has something to prove.”

Harry’s jaw clenches slightly at the negative connotes Kendall has about Y/n’s life. Something about it makes his stomach twist the wrong way, and he can’t help the underlying growl in between his words.

“We’re not normal. Deep down, you and I both know that. You also don’t know Y/n, so stop making irrational assumptions about her.”

Kendall narrows her eyes at Harry, a gaze full of confusion and disbelief at the undeniable grumble in his tone. Any rational conversation they have about Y/n always end the same—with Harry quick to end the discussion and jump to her defense. It’s times like these Kendall never understood the true extent of Harry and Y/n’s relationship. They always claimed it was platonic but there has always been a sense of something stronger in them, like unaddressed or unchased feelings, or a past they shared that was kept between the two.

Either way, it annoyed the shit out of Kendall because they both were hiding something that she’ll never be able to get answered.

“Fine, whatever.” She sighs dramatically, scooting her chair back until she has room to stand properly. “Want some more wine? Getting some.”

Harry slides his empty wine glass so that it’s in front of her, muttering a small “yeah, thanks” before she’s on her way to the counter across the room, retrieving extra wine and mingling with some of Harry’s family.

Harry sighs while his head rests at the palm of his hand, eyes gazing directly to where Y/n is standing. His lips tug up lightly when he hears her laugh from the living room, his tongue running over his bottom lip ever so slightly as he watches her mouth lift and her eyes squint shut as she catches up with one of his uncles about his grand annual weekend fishing trip.

And as his eyes stay so transfixed on the woman in the other room, he can’t help but imagine seeing that type of perfection every day for the rest of his life.

“And everyone thinks Sweet Creature is about me..”

Harry’s head snaps to Gemma’s figure leaning over the edge of the island, her elbows hitched on the counter as a small smirk plays on her lips. She found it abnormally amusing how he didn’t even acknowledge her presence until she spoke, too invested in hawking over Y/n’s every move.

Harry grumbles, but the smile from Y/n’s laughter is permanent on his lips when he does so. Gemma even notices his cheeks brighten with pink, another hint of confirmation to the words she spoke.

“Shut up, Gem.“

She puts her arms up defensively, “Hey, don’t take it out on me. I’m just making an observation.”

Harry rolls his eyes as Gemma wraps her arm around his neck, hunching over so that her lips are close to his ear and eyes are directed toward Y/n again.

“She has gotten hotter, hasn’t she?”

She has no idea. All Harry can think about is how someone already so beautiful has grown to be so perfect. Everything about her makes Harry want to get down on his knees and worship every inch of her body. He has to bite down on his bottom lip to stop himself from thinking how much of a wreck he wants to make out of her.

“I don’t know how she did it. You better get her while you still have the chance, I know many, many men who want a taste of her.”

No is the first thing Harry thinks when the words leave from Gemma’s mouth. As hypocritical and selfish as it is, knowing other men have shown an interest in her makes his skin crawl. And he can’t help but feel his throat tighten at the moment Y/n realizes he had brought Kendall to this party.

“Is she—“ he can’t even finish his sentence without his jaw tightening again, hindering the rest of his question from leaving his lips.

“Oh, quit your worrying, H. She’s single, I don’t think she’d ever date someone who isn’t you. Besides, I don’t think you can do much about it with Kendall here.”

Gemma lifts a finger to where Kendall is standing, still in the same spot as she talks to his aunt Leslie. His heart hurts knowing what Y/n will feel when she finds out. He knows that there is always a part of her that feels discouraged whenever there’s a new woman in his life. In between Harry and Y/n’s love for each other was a mix of false hopes and miscommunication, and it always fucked them up whenever anything else was put in their way.

Gemma pats his shoulder before making rounds to her family and friends again, leaving Harry slumped against the counter with not a drop of wine to numb his scrambling mind.

When Y/n finishes catching up with the rest of Harry’s family, she finds that her patience is wearing thin. It’s been a year since she’s seen the love of her life, and knowing that he’s somewhere near her is enough to get her heart racing.

When she sees him sitting alone at the kitchen island, wearing his infamous pink suit and staring down at his fingers, it’s as if her body starts to malfunction. Her legs stop moving and her lips part, eyes glistening with admiration as she sees him for the first time in so long.

He’s as beautiful as ever, his new haircut accentuating his facial structure. His lips seem so much more red, too, which are complimented greatly by that goddamn suit. Everything about him radiates, like he’s developed into a whole other person. She’ll never quite grasp the idea that she’s about to reunite with him; something about it makes her palms sweat.

“Hey, stranger.”

Harry lifts his head up to look at her in all her glory. His heart warms at her presence more than the wine did, and he can’t help but to take a breath of relief when he finally hears her voice again.

“Y/n.” He breathes out, his fingers instinctively reaching up to the ends of her cut hair.

He chokes out a laugh of admiration when he sees her this close to him. She is so much different—so much more perfect than he ever remembers her being and it takes his breath away.

His fingers twist her hair, wrapping them around the digits before letting the strands fall back in place again. He never saw her without her hair down to her waist, and now that he has, he never wants to see her hair past her shoulders again.

“It’s so beautiful” he whispers, “you look so beautiful like this, Y/n. I absolutely love it.”

She blushes, her chin tucking slightly into her neck as if trying to hide how much of a reaction he got out of her. No matter how many years she’s known him, she was never used to the way he spoke to her.

“It was spontaneous. Really wanted a change, and it looks like I’m not the only one.”

Her hands reach to his hair, which is so much shorter compared to the last time she saw him. She remembered she couldn’t keep her hands out of it last year, constantly finding ways to tangle her fingers at the ends. Harry found it hysterical, actually, and thought it was the cutest thing she’s ever done.

“It’s just so soft” she’d say, “it’s like a whole other world in there!”

But now her only option is to tangle her fingers at the roots, and as she does so, her mind drifts to all the other occasions she could have her hands in his hair again.

“It’s so much shorter. Look at that! I can barely tug on it anymore!” She laughs in amusement, her fingers slipping as she pulls too hard.

He smirks up at her, a giggle falling from his lips as he watches her utterly amused reaction. They begin to catch up with the part of their lives they both have missed. Harry talked about his album while Y/n started discussing her new journalism job.

Talking to Y/n is one of the only normal parts of him left, it always gave him a sense of grounding whenever he felt his career was taking off to heights he wasn’t ready for. She is one of the only sense of normality he has left in his life, and it’s another reason as to why he admires her so dearly. She brought out parts of him nobody else could reach, and it’s another reason why he feels so upset he’s barely talked to her.

“Y/n?” he asks hesitantly, reaching his hand over so that his fingertips graze her hand.

Her breath breaks when he touches her, the softness in his voice proving that what is about to be discussed is far more important than their previous conversation. She notices the stress lines in between his forehead and the parting of his wine stained lips when he begins to speak. 

“I’m so sorry I haven’t kept in touch with you. I know how it makes me look, especially after everything that happened between us. With the new album and everything, I’ve just been so busy with—“

“Kendall?”

Harry’s head jumps to where Y/n stares dumbfounded, Kendall holding two glasses of wine in one hand while the other is carrying a plate of chicken wings. She’s looking down at Y/n, too, her eyebrows lifted up in an intimidating manner. There’s a scowl present on her lips as she continues to tower over her.

Y/n feels tears building in her eyes as she takes in the situation at hand. She was so fucking dumb to think that Harry was going to come to Anne’s party alone, especially since his new album just released. This is Kendall’s prime time appearance, when Harry needs a familiar famous face beside him to advertise his solo career.

This isn’t anything new—this isn’t anything unfamiliar, but the pain feels like a fresh wound to her heart. Harry and Y/n are nearly 24, with having known each other and felt something for each other for years, she thought that if anything were going to happen, it was going to happen now. But everything between them has remained stagnant for so long that the last sliver of hope she had for their potential relationship has been completely taken away from her. By Kendall, again.

“W—Wow, I’m sorry. I didn’t—I didn’t know Harry had invited you.”

“Yeah,” Kendall nods, “he invited me last night.”

Last night.

Y/n’s lips purse together, nodding her head as her eyes drift around the kitchen. Anything to avoid Kendall’s eyes—anything to feel as unimportant as she does now.

Harry’s eyes squeeze shut, a small hissing releasing from his tongue at how wrong it all sounds, considering absolutely nothing happened between Harry and Kendall the previous night besides being demanded that the two of them are to be seen together again.

“Right,” Y/n’s voice cracks, “well, I’m sorry to interrupt your time together. I’m going to go to Gemma’s room, got a phone call from my dad a while ago so I should go check up on him. I’ll see you guys around.”

She musters up a pathetic smile before practically running away from them. After everything they both told each other, after all the feelings they’ve had toward each other, how could Harry keep doing this to her? How could he keep being with Kendall when he says he loves Y/n?

She doesn’t even find the strength in her to hold in her tears before she approaches the steps, not daring to look back at them again. She never wants to see them in the same room again, it’ll be too much her heart can handle. 

“You’ve really got to be fucking kidding me, Kendall.” Harry growls.

His hands fist around the wine glass, his knuckles turning white and he’s absolutely shocked it hasn’t shattered into pieces in his hands from all the anger pulsing through his veins.

Jesus, Harry, neither one of you can take a joke. Does she not understand that all of this is for the press? She keeps acting like we’re a couple.”

“Could you really blame her after that? ‘He invited me last night,’ you’re really getting a kick out of making her uncomfortable, aren’t you?”

He grumbles as he takes a long sip of his wine, hoping that the alcohol loosens his muscles enough to restrain himself from doing anything he regrets. He loves his mum too much to start an argument during her birthday party, and as much as Kendall’s shifting Harry’s mood, he still appreciates her as a friend to ruin anything.

“That wasn’t even my fault, you both dug into that way too deep. Last night does not mean while we were fucking. It’s a time of day.”

“It’s the way you said it.”

“Are you being serious, Harry?”

He slams his glass down on the island, grumbling under his breath while he stands up from his chair. No matter how much anger is in him now, the only thoughts swirling in his brain are wondering if Y/n’s okay. She would have never left the party to go into a secluded room, not even if her dad called her.

“You leave her the fuck alone, Kendall. I mean it.”

He storms away from her, desperate to find Y/n because God only knows what’s really happening in that bedroom. Y/n’s emotions and feelings are always positive, always so bright, and he refuses to be the reason they turn upside down. She doesn’t deserve all he keeps doing to her, she doesn’t deserve him.

When Harry nearly swings himself onto the first step, he can already hear the soft murmur of Y/n’s and Anne’s voice, which makes him stop from approaching them any more than he has already.

“Y/n? Y/n, darling?” Anne asks with worry when she sees Y/n climbing up the top step with tears in her eyes, soft cries falling from her throat as her hand attempts to silence them.

She reaches an arm out for her, tugging at the front of Y/n’s dress slightly to get her attention. She’s grateful it was Anne who found her this way instead of any other guest at the party, considering nobody besides her and Harry have seen her with a frown on her face.

“Y/n, baby, what’s going on with you?”

The lights are off in the hallway, with no guests permitted in the area, which gives Y/n the proper time to fully allow her tears to fall down her cheeks.

“I’m so s—sorry, Anne.” Y/n cries.

Anne’s hands rub her shoulders, reassuring her that there’s absolutely nothing for her to apologize for. It also lets her know that she’s willing to listen to her, no matter where or when—she’ll always be there.

“I’m almost 24, Anne, and I’ve put so much of my life on hold for him.”

She knows instantly who Y/n’s talking about. It wasn’t difficult to notice the undying connection between Y/n and her son, especially as the years went on. They have grown so strongly together, there has never been a doubt in Anne’s mind that Y/n is going to be the girl Harry ends up marrying. Everyone in the family called it a destiny waiting to happen, but it has been so long since anything has happened between them, and Anne can’t help but feel heartbroken to know Y/n’s carrying the wrong idea about him and Kendall.

“And I’ve sacrificed so m—much to continue waiting for him, but I don’t think I can keep doing this anymore. We’re nowhere near where we should be, especially when he keeps spending time with Kendall and I just—I just don’t know if I can—“

“Oh, my darling.” Anne sighs, cradling Y/n’s head against her shoulder as she rubs down her back.

She shushes her through her tears, rocking her slightly in an attempt to calm her from her cries. It’s extremely rare for Y/n to feel upset, so when she does so, Anne knows she deserves all the comfort and love she can get.

“I know you so well, and I know my son. I always knew you were a match made in heaven, my dear. I knew from the start you were more than just an ordinary girl. You’re so special, to everyone in our family, but especially to him. He may not have his head screwed on right most of the time, but if I can promise you anything with all my heart, it’s that he loves you. Please, no matter what, never forget that.”

Y/n nods against her shoulder, thanking her through her violent cries before Anne insists she takes some time to herself. And as much as Y/n wanted to refrain from going into Harry’s bedroom, it’ll be the only place that brings her a sense of comfort.

Harry already knows he’s in for a lecture the second he sees his mum coming down the stairs with bewildered eyes. She grips his shoulders, her face tight with frustration.

“Mum—“

“You go over to her and you be the man I taught you to be, Harry.”

Harry’s eyes widen at her words, swallowing thickly at the thought of disappointing another person in his life.

“She loves you and you love her. Stop doing favors for other people and start thinking about you before you ruin both of your lives forever. You hear me?”

Harry nods feverishly, determined and more motivated than ever to fix all that he’s caused. Love comes first, always, and he needs to remember that before he breaks Y/n’s heart completely.

She’s it. She’s all that matters to him.

He barely responds to Anne before he’s racing to his old bedroom, completely clueless as to what he’s going to say, but willing to do anything to get her back.

“Y/n?” Harry calls through the door of his old bedroom. “Y/n, can I come in?” 

He knocks on the door lightly, just using the knuckles of his pointer and middle finger. He hears her feet pad over to the door, opening it to reveal her tear stained cheeks. Her hands are trembling against the knob, her breath broken with soft, gentle cries. Her eyes are widened with sadness, wet and red from tears she barely ever cries.

“Y/n.” He whimpers, tentatively reaching his shaking fingers up to her cheeks. He wipes away the tears from the bottoms of her eyes, sighing upsettingly as her eyes close at his touch. “Never seen you like this. Please talk to me.”

Her lips quiver as another sob rips through her, her hand reaching up to capture his between her fingers. Her saddened and wet eyes looking down at the intertwined hands now resting against her lap.

“I’m so tired, H.” She whimpers, “So tired.”

His lips press against her forehead, “I know, love. I know.”

She wraps her arms around him, her face burying in between his chest as he lets her tears soak in his undershirt.

“I couldn’t take it anymore. I thought I’d finally be alone with you after all this time. I missed being close to you, I wanted to be closer to you and I thought you felt the same about me and I didn’t understand, Harry, I didn’t get it and—“


“Hey, relax for me.” Harry mumbles, his lips grazing tenderly along her cheek.

She takes a deep breath, her fingers fisting the back of his suit tighter in her fists. She rests her chin on the top of his chest, tears still roaming down her face as she lets out an exasperated sigh. Her fingertips trace patterns on his back, her eyes fluttering closed as he pushes some of her hair off of her face, refraining them from sticking to her wet cheeks.

“I didn’t get it,” she whispers, “I was so confused, and when you didn’t answer my calls or texts I thought you didn’t find me important. And I was under no right to be upset about it, because you’re busy and you have priorities. But when I saw you today, I didn’t see you as the Harry I always have, I still can’t tell you what I saw but I wanted every part of you more than I ever have before. But when I saw Kendall I—“

Her cries and words die down when she feels Harry’s tender lips against hers. She’s taken aback at first, and before she has any time to really kiss him back, he’s already pulled away.

“Let me fix this.” He breathes out, “let show you that I only want you.”

His lips press against the side of her mouth, not allowing himself to kiss her the way he wants to until she lets him. They then begin to travel down her neck, along her jaw, around her mouth.

Y/n’s breath is stiff as he does so, embracing the feeling of his mouth against her skin. They’ve only ever kissed a handful of times, none of them being passionate or loving. They’ve shared pecks while saying goodbyes or after confessing their feelings, but none quite like this—none quite like the one anticipating to happen.

His breathing his hard when he continues to kiss along her skin, his fingers moving longly in her hair the more his mouth presses against her.

“Will you let me?” He whispers when his lips are ghosting over hers, “this okay?”

She nods feverishly, hitting the point of desperation when she feels his breath fan over the skin of her face. She’s been needing this for far too long now.

“Yes, please.

His thumb runs over her bottom lip one, two, three times before he finally leans in. Their lips mush together passionately, only breaking apart to move their position before locking again. Their tongues meet in the middle, making the both of them moan at the unfamiliar spark coursing through their veins.

Harry walks toward his bed until Y/n’s knees hit the edge of it, making her back meet the mattress. Their lips haven’t detached once, not daring to break away from the feeling they’ve both been deprived of.

They’re both making out on Harry’s childhood bed, grinding onto each other half naked like two hormonal teenagers. Their clothes thrown across the room, lips swollen from all the suction and nibbling, and hair completely knotted from either of their fingertips, the party below them long forgotten.

“Wait, wait wait wait!” Y/n gasps, lifting herself off of his chest.

Harry’s chest rises and falls rapidly, trying to catch his breath as he looks up at Y/n in confusion. He watches as a smirk lifts from her lips as she peers down at his flushed face, giggling slightly at his complete fucked out appearance.

She notices that his lips remained stained from the red wine—a little faded—but still making her body weak at the sight of it.

“’s the matter?” He croaks.

His voice is thick—an entirely different level of raspy, and Y/n wonders how she’s lived so long without hearing him speak in that way. Between all the kissing, all the touching, all the moaning, his voice has a particular roughness to it that Y/n could feed off of if she had to.

“We shouldn’t do this, right? I mean, we’re about to fuck during your mum’s birthday party. Your entire family and Kendall are downstairs, anybody could walk in at any second, or hear us, and your mum could find that so disrespectful and—“

Her rambling is interrupted by his lips, meeting hers passionately between her words.

There is no way in hell he’s leaving this room tonight. Everything that’s been stagnant between them is finally moving in the right direction, and he can’t find it anywhere in him to walk away from it.

“You think I’m letting you go now?” He whispers, his thumb running along her bottom lip. “I have been waiting for this moment with you since high school, sweetheart.”

His lips reattach to her neck, sucking on spots he hasn’t already left marks on, soaking up every bit of the time he has with her before it’s over. This is the first time they’re going to make love, and he wants to feel and remember every bit of this moment.

“B—But your mum—“ She moans, her fingers nearly tangling at the ends of his hair as she hisses in pleasure from his tongue.

“Every single person downstairs knows about us. This—this happening right now, has been expected to happen since I first brought you home. I guarantee you, nothing will make her more happy than knowing her son and his future wife are finally acting on our feelings instead of pushing them to the side again.”

His words make Y/n blush like no other; her cheeks turning the shade of pink on her dress she wore previously. It’s then he notices just hot fucking pretty she is in pink, how every tint of the color compliments her in ways he can barely wrap his head around.

“Future wife, hm?” She smirks, tapping the pads of her fingers against his bare collarbones.

He kisses her again.

“Thought you knew that, love. Wouldn’t know a single soul I’d rather spend the rest of my life with.” His fingers dig into her hips, “’s always been you.“

Y/n pushes Harry’s back against the mattress again, trailing her fingers down his torso. She giggles when his teeth clench at her touch, finding it almost irresistible to embrace the way he responds to her touch so easily.

“Trust me, I always knew.”

Be More Chill Sky High AU

I saw this textpost here by dear-enjolras-hansen and was inspired to make a bmc sky high au! I remember watching the movie as a kid and loving it. But, yeah, go read the DEH one cause it’s real fun and cute!

Jeremy

  • Telepathy/Mind control
  • His mind control powers only came to him in his junior year, and they’re not full brainwashing
  • Basically he can’t actually force people to do something, but he can place powerful feelings of wanting to do it in the person’s head
  • His telepathy is full blown though and he can’t turn it on or off
  • But when he gets flustered or goes through strong emotions other people’s thoughts get jumbled in with his own and he can’t really tell the difference
  • His telepathy only came in sophomore year so freshman year he was powerless and therefore placed as a sidekick
  • Even in sophomore year his telepathy was kind of useless in combat so it wasn’t until junior year when his mind control kicked in that he was moved up to hero
  • He’s always felt really inadequate and weak because of his powers or lack therefore of
  • The fact that he can hear people’s snide thoughts about him also put a dent in his self esteem
  • He got called creep a lot because people accused him of purposefully listening in on their thoughts
  • Once he got moved up to hero people started to like him a lot more though
  • He initially lets it go to his head and basically abandons Michael and Christine
  • Buuuut eventually he snaps out of it and realises he’s been a dick
  • (His guilty pleasure is listening in to Michael think about dorky things like video games and poptarts)
  • The only time he ever used his mind control outside of combat was to guide people to the right questions during tests
  • Eventually they fiqured him out and he has to take exams after school now
  • Realised end of sophomore year he’s in love with Michael
  • Realises that all of Michael’s thoughts are less bromantic and more romantic
  • Runs up to Michael last day before spring break and declares his love in the middle of the school hall
  • They kiss and there’s no voices in his head for a moment

Michael

  • Sooo everybody thinks it’s going to be technopathy but it’s actually sound manipulation
  • It’s pretty cool, he can make really good music with it
  • He can also kind of use it in combat like Coach Boomer
  • Basically he can use sound waves as a physical force
  • But he fails to portray that in initiation so he gets put as a sidekick
  • He isn’t too bothered about it because, hey, he’s got Jeremy
  • And that girl Christine seems nice
  • His powers came to him in middle school so he’s basically known since then he wants to go into composing
  • He spends his free time hanging out with Jeremy and Christine, making music, and researching 90s super heroes and sidekicks
  • Even though he’s doesn’t become popular until him and Jeremy make up after their fight, ever since first year he’s been hired as the DJ for every major event at school
  • He writes sappy love songs dedicated to Jeremy and only lets Christine and Chloe listen to them
  • They’re really good
  • One day Jeremy finds them and like… Michael basically dies of embarrassment
  • It’s all good though cause it ends in happy making out
  • Doesn’t actually really care all that much about superheros or superpowers
  • He’s more interested in human culture
  • He’s one of the only kids at their school that doesn’t immediately judge people by their powers

Christine

  • Shapeshifting
  • It was actually only a week before the start of her freshman year that her powers came to her
  • She can shapeshift into any animal or human
  • But she really hates using her powers for combat so she was placed as a sidekick
  • This is mostly due to the fact that during initiation she only shapeshifted into a toucan, a bunny, and Lindsey Lohan
  • She shapeshifts a lot
  • Christine aint afraid to use her powers basically every ten minutes
  • She just loves changing randomly into a gecko
  • She’ll often change herself to look like Jake to confuse people
  • Jake finds it absolutely hilarious
  • She also likes to play harmless pranks on people
  • Like everything’s normal and then BAM elephant in the canteen
  • One time she changed into a frog and snuck into Chloe’s school bag to surprise her
  • Needless to say she was almost turned into an icicle by accident
  • Even though she’s a sidekick and not really in any popular circles, everybody likes her so she’s kind of friends with everybody
  • She’s really close friends with Jeremy and Michael though so she confides mostly in them and vice versa
  • She’s super close with Jenna after junior year as well so they have kind of a queer platonic relationship going on
  • For three years she’s had to hear about Michael’s ‘unrequited’ love for Jeremy and then when they finally got together Jake tells her he’s got a massive crush on Rich
  • And she’s just like crying to Jenna “Why do people ask me for relationship advice, I’m demiromantic, I don’t know what the hell I’m doing!”

Rich

  • This boi is pyrokinetic!
  • His powers came to him during the summer holidays before sophomore year
  • When he came back he showed off like nobody’s business and they moved him up to hero
  • He’s popular but everybody is lowkey scared of him
  • Then one day at a party he has a mental break down due to stress of family life and identity crises and all this shit
  • And he accidentally burned down Jake’s house and put him and Jake in hospital
  • After that he was super afraid of using his powers at all and was at risk of being moved down to sidekick again which would absolutely crush his self esteem
  • It was actually Jeremy that came up to him and sat him down and let him talk out all his emotions
  • The next day Jeremy took Jake aside and told him how guilty Rich feels
  • Rich and Jake have a long conversation about it and Jake tells him that just because he messed up once doesn’t mean he should stop using his powers
  • Rich gets mental health support and starts building up his life again
  • And all his friends are there to support him as he does
  • He also realises he’s bi
  • Makes an appalling amount of fire puns
  • Has a tiny crush on Jake and ends up going to prom with him
  • They spend the night together and after that start dating
  • It’s pretty good
  • Rich used to bully Jeremy about his powers but now they’re an really good terms
  • Him and Brooke basically talk to eachother about everything
  • She just gets him so they have a close platonic relationship
  • One year they went as a sexy angel and sexy devil for halloween
  • (Rich was the devil)

Jake

  • Super speed/Super strength
  • Immediately put as a hero without having to do initiation because of his parents
  • Jake’s had his powers since he was like ten so he knows how to use them really well
  • In school, people with more than one super power are already admired, that’s why Jeremy suddenly became really popular when he realised he could use mind control
  • But Jake’s just naturally an awesome guy
  • He’s basically the most popular guy in sky high
  • He prefers using his super speed more than his super strength but he’s well trained in both
  • Pretty much set for life since his mums were both well known superheros
  • He’s following in their footsteps
  • Already stopped a few small bank robberies
  • Dated Chloe all throughout freshman year
  • Broke up with her when he realised he was only with her because they were both the ‘most popular girl/boy in school’
  • Dated Brooke for a bit in sophomore year and then went on a few dates with Christine in junior year
  • Drunkenly made out with Jeremy one time during Jeremy’s ‘popular’ phase
  • Basically he’s hooked up with a bunch of kids at school
  • Because he’s seen as the ‘golden boy’, he feels a lot of pressure to do well as well as keep up his image to his classmates
  • Turns to sex and alcohol for stress release
  • He had a problem and refused to get help but after he almost burned to death and was put in hospital it was kind of like a wake up call for him
  • He got his shit together and he still regularly goes to AA meetings
  • Gets an extreme puppy love crush on Rich their senior year
  • Keeps doing things like lifting up benches or running to catch footballs on the other side of the school to try and impress him
  • It works out well in the end
  • Really good friends with Brooke, Chloe and Jenna
  • They make him carry their shopping bags and sometimes them when they go shopping

Chloe

  • Ice powers
  • She’s had her powers since the end of elementary school so she’s really talented with using them
  • She can kick ass in combat but also uses her powers to create ice sculptures and cool her drinks up in the summer
  • Put as hero no question
  • Best at combat in sky high behind Jake
  • On her way to becoming a great superhero
  • Is often called ‘Ice Queen’
  • She likes it and is thinking of using it for her alias
  • Has to deal with a lot of Elsa jokes
  • She just freezes people to get them to shut the fuck up about it
  • Loves to pair up with Rich during training
  • Watching them spar is spectacular
  • Her, Brooke, Rich and Jake are all training buddies
  • In her senior year she becomes basically best friends with Michael
  • They sit and bitch about people while listening to Michael’s latest composition
  • After Brooke and Jake broke up Chloe and Brooke started up a ‘friends with benefits thing’
  • Then Chloe realised she was actually in love with Brooke and wanted to cuddle and kiss her non-sexually
  • So she puts up a massive ice sculpture outside Brooke’s house one day junior year  that says ‘BE MY GIRLFRIEND
  • They become a couple
  • Has been close friends with Jenna since they were kids, and even though she acts like she’s perpetually annoyed by her, Chloe is super overprotective of Jenna
  • Like she’s overprotective of all her friends (especially Brooke), but like it’s really noticeable with Jenna
  • Once knocked a guy out for making fun of Jenna being a sidekick
  • She’s a very angry teen just cause of social and academic pressure, as well as her crippling insecurity
  • When she’s super angry she’ll storm off to be alone
  • And just sit and let the things around her slowly be overtaken by frost and ice
  • Turns lakes into ice rinks in the summer for her and her friends to skate on

Brooke

  • Flight
  • Brooke’s had her powers since she was a baby
  • Her parents had to put an extra secure cage on her cot so that she would stop whizzing around her room at midnight
  • She also had to be put on a child leash for her toddler years
  • She loves flying so much
  • Hardly ever walks anywhere
  • Just floats around like 3 cm off the ground
  • Hero
  • She’s great in combat and is expected to be a superhero in the future
  • But she has her heart set on being a trainer
  • The spotlight kind of freaks her out so she’s much happier supporting people instead
  • Has been pining over Chloe since middle school and when she wakes up to see the ice sculpture in her garden she flies down from her bedroom window and scoops Chloe up superman style and kisses her
  • When she gets upset she flies up to a really high cloud and just kind of… sits there and cries
  • She like to fly around with Christine when she’s shapeshifted into a bird
  • She gets called ‘airhead’ a lot as a joke and even though she laughs along it makes her quite self conscious about her intelligence
  • She just feels like everybody always only sees her power when they look at her and not her
  • BFFs with Rich
  • Even though she’s scared to stand up for herself she’ll protect her friends against bullies
  • If anybody makes fun of any of her friends she takes their school bag or some other possession and puts it on the roof of the school
  • And then refuses to get it down for them

Jenna

  • Technopath
  • Nobody expected it because everybody forgets the fact that Jenna is actually super smart
  • She’s super good with any kind of technology, but especially mobile devices
  • Constantly has her phone with her
  • Is initially placed as hero in freshman year but she mostly uses her powers to snoop on people’s group chats and the school’s secrets
  • Cause she could not give less of a shit about being a superhero
  • She gets moved down to sidekick halfway through freshman year
  • The only thing she’s worried about is that her popularity is rapidly decreasing
  • She starts getting left out of loads of shit because being a sidekick means you’re a loser, basically
  • But she manages to crawl her way back up the social ladder due to her friendships with Chloe, Brooke and Jake
  • But everybody just completely labels her as a sidekick tagging along behind a group of heroes
  • So she always just assumes that people are friends with her out of pity or to utilise her power in some way
  • It takes a lot of time and reassurance from her friends to realise that that isn’t the case
  • She actually starts to care about her future in like sophomore year and starts to work hard on training with her powers and her grades
  • End of senior year she gets an offer to work with the government which she takes
  • Really close friends with Christine
  • They move in together after high school
  • They’re quite codependent on each other but not in an unhealthy way
  • They’re just super close
  • The lines between a platonic and romantic relationship between them are blurred
  • Close friends with Chloe and texts her about every piece of gossip she hears
  • Favourite hobby is hacking into homophobes/transphobes/racists/etc blogs and changing them to look like foot fetish blogs

I may have to write a fic of this… But yeah. BMC Sky High AU

Black Girl, NYC

Greetings people. I identify as a Black female who was born and raised in NYC. I am slowly progressing through my study of education and history in college. Other then that, I spend (probably) an unhealthy amount of time reading and writing sci fi and fantasy. But by high school, I got sick and tired of the same story featuring blonds and brunettes saving the day with their straight, lean male heroes so I turned to my librarian seeking something new. She pointed to Octavia Butler and the rest was history. I’ve been seeking diversity in media ever since.

Family life and Culture

I grew as the middle child of six siblings with my single mother and grandparents. Yes, my working-class household fits the stereotype. We even have an absent father *sighs* But, hey shit happens. And with the biological father turns out not to be the best father figure, shit had to go right out the door. Yup. But make no mistake that this is a norm. Most households on my block do have both parents involved in their children’s lives. Our circumstances called for us to have one. That’s all.

The house was full, loud and rambunctious. We made up a good portion of the children on the block (unsurprising) and basically ran it. There’s a whole novel that could be fleshed out of my childhood if I wanted to. Our neighborhood is very tight knit. Next door neighbors were treated like Aunts and Uncles. When summer came around, we were sometimes divided into groups as the parents who were off from work overlooked us while braiding our heads. Blackouts became an all night bbq and sleepover on each other’s porches. Crooklyn by Spike Lee was a good representation of what it was like in fact. Somewhat. Minus the brownstones, plus a couple more fights (lol).

My grandma was a nurse who’s pretty big on us knowing our family history. She made sure to talk a lot about our Gullah Geechee roots. We also had some Dominican culture influence since her closest friend and our Madrina was, well, Dominican. But she is fairly strict on gender norms and how my sisters and I should act especially with brothers. She antagonized me the most growing up because I continued to ignore this. We don’t get along but i can’t say i don’t get why she’s the way she is. She has a pretty dark past. My mother, a latchkey kid of the finest stock, is more laid back and gives all of us free range to make our own mistakes. Most times. Other times, she’d rather lecture us. Depends on our crime.

I don’t know what my grandpa used to do. He retired waaaaay before my grandmother. I also don’t know much about his culture. He’s 1st gen Jamaican who fully assimilated into American culture. Well, beside his food choices. Now, he gambles and goes to church. When I was younger, he used to teach us how to gamble too. And how to cheat and not get caught. We got a lot of free fast food while he taught us. He has gotten more frugal the older he got. And more isolated.

Dating and Relationships.

I don’t date. I have no interest. Well, no, that’s not exactly true. I’ve considered it but I rather have not seek out anything outside of platonic right now. I have a tight knit circle of friends and several other groups of friends I associate with depending on the activity. I’m realizing it seems like I’m using the term “friends” loosely but I swear I’m not. I’m a virgin and I feel nothing about being one until someone goes “*gasp* You’re a virgin really?” and then I end up on high defense saying “So?” Believe or not, that messed with me a lot.

My love life and lack of interest in having one has always been a struggle. In middle school, the group of friends I hung with were becoming more infatuated with love and sex. Yes, middle school, fifth through eighth grade, ages nine to thirteen. But, when they would talked about who’s hot or not, they would look at me funny when I didn’t join in the discussion. Instead of explaining myself, I simply copied other’s reactions and gushed along with them. This instinct followed me through High school til stopped out of annoyance. I became a listener and adviser in their relationships because I really do love stories in many shapes and forms. And I would never turn down hearing a story.

Language

My primary language is English and AAVE. I’ve been living in a neighborhood filled with Blacks and Latinx. Most of my friends are Black and Lantinx. I didn’t meet a white person my age until college. Okay that’s a partial lie. I’ve been in a summer camp that was made up of predominantly white children. But as the only black kid in my age range, I was sorta uncomfortable. I never made lasting friends there. After High School, I spent a year abroad in Tena, Ecuador where I learned Spanish and Kichwa. I still suck at both languages.

Clothing

Lots of my clothes when I was younger were borrowed or hand-me-downs. Half of them still are. It’s like thrift shopping without the hiked prices thanks to its popularity by rich white people (Thanks rich white people!) All my siblings’ taste varies. In my case, I’m fond of combining loose and tight clothing (tight jeans and a loose sweater/ baggy jeans and a tight top). No makeup. Silver accessories.

I used to have a short bob cut permed. I hated it. But I rather a perm then getting my hair straightened with a hot comb because the back of my neck and big ears would always get burned. It wasn’t until I made a friend with a natural afro that I realized my natural hair was even an option.

Academics

Lol I was a nerd with bad grades.

Religion

My family practices Santeria, which has historical roots in both Catholicism and Yoruba thanks to slavery (Yay slavery!). However, because the religion is not fully accepted or well-known, I tend to say I’m simply Catholic if asked. Apparently, a Black Catholic is hard to believe. It is assumed all Black folks are Baptists or some branch of Christianity. I have no idea where that stereotype came from. But I can give some guess. (*cough cough* Tyler Perry….).  

As I stated before, I love scifi and fantasy. I especially love urban fantasy involving witches. I blame this love on Practical Magic and Eve’s Bayou, my childhood faves. It’s because of this love that I wish to see more stories with witches of color. And no, I don’t mean that one evil/mysterious southern/Caribbean Voodoo/Hoodoo witch hollywood loves to portray so much. That always plays into the “Black is evil” trope. Give me some damn variety!

I would squeal so hard if the mythology involved in a story isn’t even Eurocentric. I’m not joking. This is serious. When my religion was simply hinted at in the Raven Boys series (It was also a great way of making even more obvious that the character was definitely not white.) and Kenya Wright’s Habitat series, I squealed. All the authors did was write the names of some of the Orishas and I couldn’t help but put my phone down for a moment and inwardly scream with glee. That being said, if a writer does decide to use afrocentric or any religion involving “witchcraft” as a basis, I would personally ask that they make sure is is not a closed religion.

Santeria is, in fact, a closed religion. And while I don’t mind mentions of it in fantasy and even a main character stating they practice it, do not go any further than that. Don’t even research the practices within the religion other than what is public knowledge (And if you don’t have any public knowledge, just ask) Respect that there’s a limit. Anything further spelunking  is consider rude, disgusting, disrespectful and dangerous. There’s things that I don’t even know because I haven’t been properly initiated. And the internet has a lot of these practices exposed when it shouldn’t be so please don’t look into it. Please.

Food

Most of the cooking in the house has been done by my grandmother. Because of her various relationships, our food has always been a mixture of Black American, Gullah, Lantinx and Caribbean influences. It is so good. So, so good!

The only thing I don’t eat of hers is her seafood gumbo because I don’t like shellfish. One of my sisters said I should have my “black card” taken for my distaste. I said she could take it if she can name more black movies than me. She still can’t take it. My other sister wishes we could switch places because she loves crab but is allergic. The crazy girl actually sends her husband to buy some benadryl so she can eat some if we ever have some on the table. Smh. Siblings.  

Holidays

My family on both sides are quite fond of reunions. On my grandpa’s side, the family uses Fourth of July and Christmas to get together. On my grandma’s side, they tend to host annual summer reunion and send out RSVP invitations complete with schedules of the whole two to three day event. I didn’t mention this under my family life, but both sides of my family are boujee to different degrees. Lots of black sorors and frats members on both sides. I can’t believe that slipped my mind typing.

I’m a little iffy with Christmas. It’s more of a holiday for the older generation and our niece and nephews. The younger generation, however, don’t particularly care for the holiday. For some of us, it’s because it’s not really Jesus’s Birthday and Santa was whitewashed. For others, it’s because we don’t care to feed into the corporate holiday. For most of us, it’s a combination of the two. But we do love getting together when we can. My older sister and I have conspired to celebrate kwanzaa instead for the past two years. So far, it hasn’t grasped the interest of anyone else in the family.

Struggles

  • Being nerds from a young age, my siblings and I have been called “Oreos” or“Not really black” by kids in school on more than one occasion. We shut them down by fighting. Probably not the best strategy but it was best one I could think of in middle school and below. Made it easier to go back to reading my manga.

  • I got compared to my sisters a lot. It was the absolutely most annoying thing ever. And a major source of my insecurities growing older.

  • Need I address colorism? My highschool was filled with it. #TeamLight v #TeamDark. I was on neither team, because in the region I live, skin color was a pretty long spectrum. I fell in the between. Who came up with this?

  • I’ll admit it. I hate my own tears. They make me feel weak. Which isn’t true…I know. But, it is a mentality I always had. I have depression and PTSD. This isn’t really a secret. I tell people if I’m asked. But have you ever had someone look at you and say, “Really? You don’t seem like the type.” ……

  • I am a black female. I’ve been labelled “Strong” and “Independent” the older I got. By my mother. By my siblings. By my peers. And I get those labels. Even from friends. I loved those labels. I call myself by those labels. I mean, who doesn’t want to be seen as strong and independent? Those are positive affirmations, right? I think they would be. If that wasn’t all the positive labels we could get. Somehow, society has decided we are beings that are incapable of being multifaceted. I was indirectly taught to hate my own tears because black girls don’t cry. You can’t cry and be strong. What a terrible mantra fed to black girl at a young age. So, instead you tell everyone “It’s fine.”

I told my therapist it was fine. Until she told me straight up it was not fine. And it was okay to cry. I don’t like to cry. But I still (involuntarily) did it.

Things I’d like to see less of/Things I’d like to see more of:

  • I’m sick and tired of seeing black and latinx folks being portrayed as only fantasy gangs members. We are not only gang members. That’s a terrible popular myth the media put out there and I hate it even more so when it’s portrayed in SFF genre..

  • I’m tired of having one black person in a novel being described as having skin the color of “midnight.” And he’s (it’s always a he) not even that important to the story

  • I hate how every time someone decides to add a person of color, they have to be ambiguous brown. I’m not saying ambiguously brown don’t exist and don’t need representation but is it really that had for a dark brown skin person to play a major role in a story that’s not about slavery? Speaking of which….

  • Why we always gotta be slaves? Or better yet….

  • Why don’t we exist at all in High fantasy stories? Urban fantasy? Brooklyn wasn’t always the gentrified white town it is now. Still isn’t. How are you erasing people of color from NYC??? We make up way too much of the population to be completely erased

  • Stop racial coding other creatures to surround your white human characters. Especially as the bad guys. That’s just shitty writing. Step up your game!

  • I love Black love

  • I love Gay love. I wish more would follow moonlight’s example and show poc are gay too and gay doesn’t always equal to stereotypical femininity.

  • I love interracial love HOWEVER, can we pair people of color with other people of color as well? I’m starting to hate seeing it always a white person paired with a Poc. Variety damnit!

  • Friendships between boys and girls that don’t transform into love.

  • Friendships between girls that didn’t start out as a rivalry.

  • Different body types besides the skinny and tall. Make a main character that’s fat for once. It’s not a problem.

  • Magical characters of color that aren’t “Noble Savages” or “Wise Monks” that used their magic for personal gain for once instead of waiting for the white hero to come.

  • Nerdy black characters who aren’t 100% competent and cries. One that isn’t in a five token band that always gonna be compare to the white main character. Make the nerd the main character!

That’s all I can think of at the top of my head. But my list really does go on. 

Read more POC Profiles here or submit your own.

anonymous asked:

Any recent fics you read that you liked? And what about that bottom louis fic rec you promised? ;))

I will do the recent fic list because I have had some awesome fics to read in the last few days. Also, I am gonna limit it to 10 fics lest I get carried away. On to the fics!!


Like an Endless Summer by objectlesson @horsegirlharry

Louis is a riding instructor at a summer camp, and Harry is a fellow counselor who he’s been successfully managing his crush on for the last two summers. That is, until Harry shows up this year leveled up and lethal, and all Louis’s formerly perfected veneer of nonchalance melts like a Popsicle in the sun.

**This is delightful. An absolute treat!!


Or Brûlant by iris_avis (starryeyedlarry) (WIP) @iris-avis

After completing his prestigious dance training overseas, Harry returns to England to begin teaching in one of London’s elite ballet schools. Only, certain dancers aren’t too happy to have him suddenly on board. Or his well-fitted lycra uniform. Throw in some unusual dynamics, tense elevation demonstrations and an unlikely dance partnership, and you’ve got yourself a pretty interesting edition of Matthew Bourne’s ‘Swan Lake’.

Or the one where Harry is the new ballet teacher, despite him being younger than everyone in his class, and Louis is less than impressed by his inescapable talent. They sort themselves out eventually.

**I am in love with this fic. Listen, even if you don’t love ballet, you will love this.

 

cupid’s defence by rhuubarb  @rhuubarb

“Of course, the ONE time a ridiculously attractive man shows up at Louis’ home, butt naked, he turns out to be an arrogant love god. Not only that, but he’s an arrogant love god facing a multi-million pound lawsuit, possible banishment from Mount Olympus, and a shit ton of adjustment issues.”

Alternatively: Harry is Cupid, Louis and Liam own a law firm, and they’re all getting sued.

**HARRY CRIES GLITTER!! NEED I SAY MORE?!?! But in all seriousness, this fic is gold. Go read it!!


Carry This Feeling by Awriterwrites, dimpled_halo @dimpled-halo @a-writerwrites

Harry knows, objectively, that he shouldn’t try to get his ghostwriter into bed. He knows. But…he finds it hard to resist temptation when Louis waltzes into his home and his life and turns everything upside down. And, as it turns out, Louis might just need a little turning upside down too.

**This fic was a treat to read. Harry is a troubled soul and Louis helps him figure himself out.


under me, you by hazzafrazza (colberry) @colberry

You Won’t Believe Who Was Spotted Leaving Harry Styles’ Primrose Hill Pad!

If Harry was being completely honest, it probably wasn’t the best idea to be a world-renowned popstar and an infamous vigilante.

(Especially when all the comic books said never reveal your secret identity to keep your loved ones safe – which was all well and good, until Louis.)

Or: Harry wants a lot of things – fame, glory, Louis – but that last one is particularly hard to get when everyone thinks you’re dating your secret superhero alter-ego and suddenly you’ve become your own worst cockblock.

**This is fucking hilarious!! A very funny twist to your vigilante fics!!


Your Mess Is Mine by amory @amories

Louis is the father to the most brilliant little boy in the world who is all Louis really needs, or at least that’s what he tells himself. Harry is a gorgeous boybander fresh off a two year break and a massive scandal that’s left him a little broken and more than ready to move on.

They fall in love.

**I have been following this one since it had been a WIP. It is a good read.


Through Eerie Chaos by MediaWhore @mediawhorefics

For as long as anyone can remember, Old Hillsbridge Manor has always been believed to be haunted. Everyone in the village agrees and keeps a respectful, fearful, distance. New in town after a bad breakup and an internship that led to disappointment rather than a permanent job, Harry Styles figures taking pictures of the decrepit building could be a great new creative project. Or at least a much-needed distraction while he searches for a job and crashes at his parents’ new house. No one warned him about the apparitions though; about the music, the laughter, the people who flicker and vanish when you call after them, the echoes of a past that should be long gone… Harry has never believed in spirits but even he can admit that there’s something weird going on. What starts as mere curiosity evolves into a full-blown investigation and soon enough, Harry finds himself making friends with an aristocrat from the 1920s and struggling with finding the best way to tell him that he’s dead.

The Ghost Hunter AU where Niall lives to prove ghosts are real, Zayn is a skeptical librarian and Harry gets caught up in a century-old mystery and catches feeling in the process.

**This fic has probably been recced everywhere in every list as it should be. It is one of the most unique fics I have read. Also, the feels are real. Get ready to cry.


picture you staring by turnyourankle @floralhoran

If there’s one thing Louis won’t stand for it’s being replaced as his nieces’ favourite uncle.

Especially by some bloke they met barely hours into their holiday in Portugal who’s not even related to them.

**This is very short and very sweet!! Like super sweet!!!


Packed Lunches, Sticky Fingers and Accidental Levitation by LadyLondonderry @londonfoginacup

Harry Styles is a skilled work-from-home potionist five years out of university with a steady job, a house, and… eight kids.

He also might be heading towards a breakdown if he doesn’t get a bit of help.

Enter a meddling pixie and an old university friend he might or might not have had a lot of feelings for.

**This is the fluffiest fic I have read most recently. It is endearing with a very unique setting!! 


Runaway Land by daggerinrose (WIP)

Louis is sure he’s stumbled upon a secret, underground nightclub, though that is far from the truth. He’s also pretty sure he’s stumbled upon Apollo, which… isn’t very far from the truth, actually.

Modern Greek mythology AU

**Again, a very unique fic. It is quite intense, and thrilling. Go give it a read!!


All is fair in love and war by weddingbells @babygotstyles

The Nanny AU in which Louis is the sassy gay Nanny-by-accident taking care of the kids of movie director Harry Styles. Also there’s Liam as the butler, Niall as Louis’ best friend, Zayn as the model/actor and Nick as Harry’s partner from work that maybe wants a bit more from Harry than cooperation.

**This is hilarious, Also, Nick is a dick. So, you know, a warning…


That’s How I Know by allwaswell16  @allwaswell16

Louis Tomlinson has just landed his dream job, coaching soccer at Augustus University. When he moves into a new house near campus, he meets his very fit new neighbor, English professor Harry Styles. Although their first meeting leads to an instant mutual dislike, the more Harry gets to know Louis, the more he likes what he sees.

Or the one where Harry’s African grey parrot spills his dirty secrets to his very hot neighbor.

**This one was so good, guys. You will fall in love with Darcy, the parrot. And it got me looking into parrots and stuff. They are awesome!! But read this fic first!!! I am also quite curious about the writer. I really liked their writing style and would love to read more of their works!! 


The Fairy Ring by thedeathchamber @louehvolution

Harry has dreamed of a world outside the tiny village of Holmes Chapel for as long as he can remember… a world full of magic and adventure and true love.
It was nothing but a childhood dream, however, until an old family friend comes bearing word of a plot against Harry’s life and a very dangerous truth: Harry is the rightful heir to the crown and must embark on a perilous quest to reclaim his throne from the ruthless would-be King Simon.
But in the end Harry will find himself fighting for more than a crown, and on the verge of losing something much more precious than his sovereign power.
Because magic might be real, but life is not a fairy tale, and Harry is a prince up against a very big dragon.

Or: a medieval fantasy AU in which Harry is a prince in disguise and Louis is the king of the faeries.

**A fantasy au!! Very interesting read!!


The Sweetest Incantation by smittenwithlouis @smittenwithlouis

Harry has been alive for decades, and yet he’s never been as confused and dumbfounded. He’s a witch, for God’s sake. Can’t get much weirder than all the magical things he’s experienced throughout his lifetime. Never in a million years, however, would he have expected to be mere inches away from a hybrid.

Or: Harry is a witch who’s still working on developing his powers and Louis is a werecat who falls into his life and turns it upside down.

**I LOVED THIS FIC!!! I LOVED EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS FIC!! i WOULD GIVE MY LIFE FOR THIS FIC!! I mean, KittenHybrid!Louis, Witch!Harry, Matchmaker!Steve!!! What else do you need?!?! Go read this, right now!!

FICS FOR STEREK’S VALENTINE’S DAY FIC REC

As it’s coming up to Valentine’s day I thought I would put a rec together of all my favourite Valentine’s themed fics!

Hope you enjoy, and remember as always, make sure you check rating, tags and warnings on all fics!


Always (1/1 | 1,066 | Not Rated)

Derek’s in love with Stiles but thinks he’s about to lose him. Stiles was never going to let Derek go in the first place. Fluff ensues.

Sometimes love is an obligation to your grandmother (1/1 | 6,982 | Rated M)

Dearest Derek,

Welcome to your 21st year! As per the wonderful tradition of the house of Hale, you will be attending some of the best places to be single that Beacon Hills has to offer today. First, it’s to the Coffee Shop on Main where you will get two lemon zest chocolate chip muffins. Listen to me very carefully, I’m going to ease you into the way this works. Buy two muffins, but you’re only going to eat one. Find someone cute to give the second one to…

The letter went on, but Derek was staring at it in horror, unable to process how terrible that sounded in just the first paragraph. Today was going to suck.

*

Or: Derek’s grandmother relishes setting her single grandchildren up on Valentine’s Day. Only, less ‘setting up’ and more ‘forcing them to run a singles-only scavenger hunt where the prize is love or at least sex’.

Derek never wins. Derek never WANTS TO win.

Kiss Me Under the Light of a Thousand Stars (1/1 | 5,631 | Not Rated)

“It was a true love spell,” he admits quietly. “It was supposed to help me find my true love. And apparently I suck at magic as much as I suck at dating because I screwed this up too.”

~~~

In which Stiles’ Valentine’s Day love spell goes very wrong.

Or perhaps very right.

Valentine’s strike (2/2 | 6,015 | PG-13)

Stiles hates Valentines Day. It was the bane of his existance. But he’s home for the 'holiday’ and has nothing to do since everyone he knows is busy. Except Derek, Derek is the only one alone as him.

Or

The five times Derek and Stiles date by accident and the one time one of them actually ask.

Thank Jackson for me (1/1 | 3,187 | PG-13)

Derek keeps asking the wrong kind of questions.

Hot for Teacher(’s Aide) (1/1 | 8,050 | PG-13)

“He invited you to his apartment.”

“To do a lesson plan.”

“Yeah and to probably lesson your plan while you’re there,” Scott said, waggling his eyebrows.

“That made no sense, but you still managed to make it sound dirty,” Stiles said. “I’m impressed.”

Keep reading

Split - Kai Scenario. Part 5

Summary: You have a perfect life. A perfect little house, perfect little son who just went to Kindergarten for the first time and finally your more than perfect husband, whom you love more than your life. Of course that was three weeks ago. Before your husband decided to leave the family.

Word Count: 2076

A/n: I know this is short but I’d rather upload something now and something in a week than nothing at all. It hasn’t been the best times for me on this blog lately but I can’t stop writing this story for myself and you guys…

MY MASTERLIST  

(For mobile)

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

i’m sorry tumblr won’t let me add “keep reading”


Originally posted by dazzlingkai

I recommend rereading part 4 before starting this chapter!!!

You wake up on a Sunday morning with a sigh. Now you perfectly understand the meaning of that one saying. As if you’re a schoolgirl and it’s finally the last day of your holidays. But in your case you haven’t missed what’s to come even for a bit.

But this time, you decide not to sulk and make the most of the day which will probably be the last one you’ll ever spend with your complete family. Negative thoughts try to find their way into your mind but this time you do your best to keep them out and just enjoy last Sunday you’ll spend happily.

You won’t ruin it.


You quickly get out of the bed. this time you don’t wake up next to your almost ex-husband which is quite a disappointment, but then you sneak a look inside Tae’s room and see him hugged by his father in sleep. And it’s quite enough for you. You can share Jongin with your son even if you’re very selfish.

You don’t lose time swooning over the perfect picture and step inside the bathroom to get ready for the day. After washing up and putting on a comfortable sundress, you head to the kitchen. You plan to make this day perfect for everyone and in your family’s case that means food.

Although you like the thought of healthy diet, the thought of Jongin and Tae’s happiness when they see fried chicken for breakfast is enough persuasion you need.

Time goes quickly while you do everything to make sure that the “breakfast” table is flawless. And just when you’re about to put the last plate on it, you hear footsteps and soon both of your favorite boys step inside the kitchen. You don’t know who’s more excited when seeing what they’re about to eat.

“You’re just in time for breakfast.” You say with a big smile, even though it’s already half past two in the afternoon, it’s normal with Jongin and Tae who goes after his father in everything.

“The smell woke us up.” Jongin can’t take his eyes off the table. “This smells so good, how could we have slept more.” He laughs and sits next to Tae. They’ve both already started devouring the food.

“Wow this is really good.” Jongin comments. “I haven’t tasted anything better for a while, where did you order this?” he asks while handing Tae the neck of chicken. “Start with this.” He adds.

“I made this actually.” You say quietly. Jongin stops and widens his eyes while chewing slowly. “Mommy is the best cook ever, isn’t she?” Tae says with a full mouth. You laugh and wipe his lips.

“Yeah, she is.” Jongin says quietly and you feel your cheeks redden. It’s like you’re returned to high school phase, or just the start of your friendship with Jongin. Not as if you’ve spend years next to him.

Almost an hour passes when the three of you are finally finished with the food. Tae tries to keep up with his dad whose tummy seems to have a hole and is never satisfied. But when the plates are finally empty Jongin suggests watching television so the three of you move to the living room and get comfortable on the couch.

And that’s how the last day (as you hate to call it) is spent. Nothing is special but amazing at the same time. The only time either of you move is to get to the bathroom or get the next fill of snacks. You’re watching cartoons and the Disney movies even Jongin enjoys singing along to.

When the sun is set, Tae runs to his room to get his favorite blanket and returns jumping in his father’s lap. He covers both of them with it and grabs your arm to bring you closer. You’re hesitant at first – you don’t want to make Jongin uncomfortable, but then you see them all cuddly and warm and there’s nothing that can hold you back from joining.

You move closer slowly also getting under the blanket but keeping some distance from your husband but you’re surprised, that when your neck is getting too uncomfortable for it to be laying naturally, Jongin is the one to pull his arm around you and let it rest against his shoulder, right in the position where you can also reach to kiss Tae’s head. You didn’t expect it. Definitely didn’t but for the first time in a month you feel that you’re warm again and you hadn’t even realized how frozen your body had become, deprived of his warmth.

There’s something different about him. Always has been. Just like no heating system can warm you up as well as a walk under the sun can, Jongin’s arms are the same. He’s your personal sun, your only natural way to life.

You can’t even imagine how much you crave for it.

After a while you realize that Tae has fallen asleep on his father’s chest. But you can’t blame him. Jongin is just so warm and so comfortable all you want to do is to finally get the good night’s sleep peacefully for once. But the other part forces you to stay awake to remember every single second of the time you finally felt so, so happy.

In that moment you clearly realize one thing.

He’s here. With a woman who will soon become his ex-wife. And there’s one logical question jumping in your mind.

“Jongin?” you call out, quietly enough not to wake up your son.

“Yes?” he answers, so softly that you never want that sound to leave your ears.

“How does she feel about you being here?” you drop the question, you’re truly curious about. But nothing could surprise you more than what Jongin says next.

“Who?” he asks.

You don’t know if you’re imagining it, or that you’re already stepped into your nightly dream, but you think his fingers are slowly caressing your arm. He truly seems to not recognize who you’re talking about.

“Fei.” You answer with a single word. That name won’t ever leave your memory.

You look up at Jongin secretly and see momentary confusion dwell in his eyes.

“Oh, her.” He adds and stays quiet for a moment. “Well I don’t think she likes that I’m here. She told me not to come.” He says quietly.

Of course she doesn’t. As negatively as you might be inclined towards that girl you understand that she wouldn’t want Jongin to stay over here. But you can’t sympathize when she’s the one going after a still-to-be-divorced man.

Soon after another thought occupies your mind. You know it’s childish to compare how Jongin treats Fei to how he treated you, but she told him not to come and here he is, in your living room. Not once would Jongin ever make you uncomfortable with his decisions when he lived with you. In the good old times he wouldn’t have left you alone like he did with Fei.

You’re absolutely sure of that and that thought makes you even warmer inside. Curling deeper into Jongin’s chest you have no negative thoughts raiding your mind.

 


On a Monday morning Jongin wakes up just on time without the need of an alarm clock. Slowly dressing in his formal attire he proceeds to the bathroom and kisses the head of his son who’s diligently brushing his teeth. Next he walks inside the kitchen and sees her.

She turns around to look at him and doesn’t even try to form a smile. Jongin can see how the light that was so bright inside her eyes yesterday is now completely gone. Breakfast goes in a quiet matter, so unusual to this happy household. Jongin offers to take Tae to Kindergarten and soon sees his son jumping inside his backseat. Moving like a robot she walks over and fixes his tie, he doesn’t even notice it was crooked. Well she was always better at handling it anyway.

Turning around she slides a sheet of paper in front of him, Jongin looks closely and sees lots of too professional words he hates so much.

“I signed it.” she says quietly. “Like I promised. You’re free.” That’s it. just a little doodle of Jongin’s signature is needed and everything will be over. Isn’t it what he wanted? Without a word he slides the papers inside his laptop bag and walk to the door.

Similar to the times before she walks him to the door and just like it used to be usual, he kisses her forehead and says “Bye”. But this time it doesn’t feel like usual at all.  



The day goes as usual for you. Just like it’s been this past month. You go to work, use your lunch period to pick up Tae and chew on a small bun to get you through the day. You make sure Tae doesn’t mess around and does his homework, then you take his hand and go back to the journey back home. You unlock the house, take off your coat, wash Tae’s hands and heat up the dinner you cooked the previous day. As if everything is the same but at the same time nothing is.

Even if usually you always manage to put a smile on your face just for the sake of your son, today you can’t. Today you can’t force yourself anything. You don’t have enough energy. And you know Tae feels it. Not just your feelings but you can see the same mood from him. Your son hasn’t smiled all day and you hate it. You hate it more than anything.

You know what changed. The hope is gone. Even if you spent the month alone you hoped, you wished Jongin would wake up and just come back, for you the bright future of your family wasn’t torn. You still hoped, deep down in your heart. Now you know it’s over. You lost. You lost him.

You finally manage to set the table managing not to break down seeing the number of plates. You will stay strong for your child. He deserves to have you properly functioning. Tae comes from his room slowly and sits down by your low table.

“Eat well, Tae.” You smile warmly and reach to kiss his head. He smiles too. And how can a five year old’s smile even be so full of sadness.

You’re just about to eat when you hear the lock of your front door open. You don’t know what to think. Your motherly instincts are reaching for Tae in case of a burglary. Why would a burglar step inside your house so calmly, it’s irrational you know, but you can’t give yourself any false hope that maybe what you think is happening, is actually happening.

You’re only looking at Tae, afraid to look straight at the entrance and you see your son’s face change. From curiosity to confusion and finally a shy and timid smile forms on his face.

“Daddy.” He calls.

You finally look forward.

“Started dinner without me?”

Jongin is standing with his suitcase, dressed warmly in a winter coat, his shoes are already neatly arranged in their proper place. There’s a small pout on is face for emphasis.

He looks godly.

He looks like home.

Tae looks lost, but you’re sure you’re even more confused. But your son fixes himself in a second and runs to hug his dad, like he would every day. Your son can control himself very well, but you’re sure Jongin can also see just how happy he is to see his dad, home.

You don’t let down your guard yet.

You stay frozen at your seat.

“Ahh, today was such a tiring day at work, I can’t even stand on my feet.” Jongin yawns and takes off his coat. “I’ll go wash my hands. Y/N can you please check my bag? There’s so much trash in there from work, could to throw it out? Or I’ll forget and it’ll stay there for days…” he continues talking down the hallway, his voice slowly disappearing.

I have to add a plate you think, but first, you walk over and pick up Jongin’s suitcase, opening the zip. You see paper, torn to little pieces. Torn so fiercely you wouldn’t have recognized it hadn’t you put it here in the morning. 

It’s the divorce papers.

And even though they’re destroyed, you can clearly see, there’s not a trace of Jongin’s signature.  


any kind of reviews are welcome you know that guys please flood my askbox!

bartender!jin + he’s just not that into you au


No matter how many times Jin ran over the totals report for the other night the numbers didn’t seem to be adding up. He had spent an almost mind numbing amount of time calculating receipts and cursing his father for not trusting any of his staff enough to tally their own totals for the night—and granted, the old geezer had every right not to trust his staff before Jin had stepped in, pulling rank and firing the four or five servers and bar backs that were pocketing tips from the cash register. But that was before and this wasn’t Jin’s area of expertise, no he ran the front of house, he managed the staff, made sure the bar was impeccable, and the floor was running smoothly. All this shit, the accountant shit was his brothers job.

But the useless fuck had managed to weasel vacation time out of their Dad and sure, maybe he deserved it but Seokjin had been working the same weekends and holiday shifts he’d been pulling year round, granted Jin didn’t have a newborn or wife but semantics.


“Knock knock.”

Jin barely managed to tear his eyes away from the receipts spread out in front of him, but when he does he’s met with sultry brown eyes and a pouty lower lip—also known as last nights mistake, or if he were to be more specific Seulgi. Jin cards a hand through a his blonde locks and braces himself for what he knows is coming, because he makes a habit of not sleeping with his employees but shit just doesn’t always pan out, now does it?

“Hey, babe.” He nods, “Did you need something?”

She smirks at the pet name and Jin mentally chastises himself for thinking he could try and maintain the endearing manager-employee relationship they hadd before, “No. Just thought I’d drop by… you scheduled me for swing instead of my morning shift.”

“Yeah,” Jin begins slowly, gesturing with his pen and wishing she would speed it up, because he had work to do.

“Um,” she begins to lose confidence when he doesn’t react, only blankly stares at her as though she’s stating the obvious, “I-I had a lot of fun last night.”

Jin sucks his lower lip between his teeth before nodding, “Yeah, it was.”

A pregnant pause follows his answer and he doesn’t go to fill it because there’s nothing to say. Last night was a mistake on his part but they were both consenting adults and she was just as much at fault as he was—he made no promises and he sure has hell had no intentions of making any now.

“Did you schedule me tonight on purpose?” She asks quietly.

“Seulgi,” Jin says, his voice stern but not cold, “We’re short staffed and I needed a hostess, that’s why I scheduled you.”

Seulgi’s lips form a perfect ‘o’ and it’s as if realization only just dawned on her. Seokjin pretends not to notice the a awkward atmosphere he’s created.

“We good, now?” He implores when it’s all but silent in the office, save for her scuffing her work shoes. She nods mutely but her jaws clenched, “I’ll see you on the floor then.”

Jin winces at the force she uses the slam the already creaky door shut before returning his attention to those damn totals and deposits.


You heard somewhere in a movie that all you needed was twenty seconds, just twenty second of an insane amount of courage, twenty seconds of near embarrassing bravery and it would all be worth it in the end—that you would reap something great for all your efforts.

But sometimes, as it is, life is unfair. And you can try and try, and give it your all but sometimes you lose. For no profound reason, or life lesson, but because the universe deemed it necessary, to keep balance. And even if you’ve won nine hundred and ninety-nine times sometimes it feels like all you remember is your one lost.

“Why isn’t he calling me back?” You murmur, worrying your lip between your teeth.

Your cellphone had been sitting in your hand for the better part of the night, no better part of the week waiting for his call, his text, his anything. You had refused to go anywhere without your phone, you brought it with you into the bathroom, when you were doing yoga, sometimes you would wake up in the middle of the night just to check, because you didn’t want to miss it. And the circumstance was no different now, even with your hair bundled in a towel and your face, freshly scrubbed pressed against the flannel of your pajama pants while you sit on your bedroom floor. You look down and wiggle your toes, painted cornflower blue this week, in an attempt to distract yourself.

Another sigh leaves your lips and you try not to wallow in regret because you should’ve given up four days ago but it stung.

Your twenty seconds of courage hand landed you a date with Min Yoongi, the apple of your eye since you had entered college—the two of you were acquaintances, you didn’t know each other well enough to be labeled friends. But you knew from the moment you saw him that he would star in every horribly cheesy eighties rom com fantasy you had from that day on. A crush.

A college crush and your heart felt like it would beat out of your chest when you worked up the nerve at a frat party. You didn’t go out often but you made an exception, because you were gonna do it that night. You would swallow your fears and have your twenty seconds of insane courage because Min Yoongi was worth more than that.

So with sweaty palms and a hummingbird heartbeat you had approached him when the party was in full swing, his cheeks were flushed from the liquor and he was surrounded by a group of guys. As if that wasn’t scary enough, he was a good deal older than you, a senior to your freshman but he TA’d one of your classes and sometimes he put smiley faces on your test papers. So with wide eyes and Yoongi looking at you curiously if but a bit expectantly you had asked him, in front of all those people and if he gave even the slightest inclination of discomfort you would’ve backed out. But he didn’t.

He smiled at you warmly, ignoring the whoops and hollers and pulling you to sit down next to him the couch. You nearly fainted when he threw an arm around you, brushed your hair behind your ear to speak a ’yes’ over the thumping bass.

And then was the actual date.

He was everything you thought he’d be, witty, intelligent, with a dry humor that bordered self deprecating and you could barely keep your eyes off him. His black fringe was overgrown but he managed well enough, his eyes smiling at you whenever you tripped over your words or flushed too deep at a compliment.

“You’re cute and sweet,” he said, pushing a strand of hair off your face, “Like the girl next door I never had, you know?”

You just let out a soft laugh because you didn’t know, but you knew you liked the compliment, you would’ve liked any compliment he gave you. He could’ve said he liked your fingernail on your left pointer and you probably would have combusted right there. He stopped you in front of the fountain in the middle of the quad, his hands cupping your cheeks and you thought this was it. He was going to kiss you—

…r forehead?

“I had fun tonight.” He murmured.

“Me too.” You breathe.

“I have an early morning tomorrow, but you’ll be okay to make it up to your dorm?” He queries, and his hands are still on your cheeks, stroking the skin, you don’t think you can breathe much less answer but…

“Mhm,” you choke out and Yoongi sends you a small smile.

“Great. I’ll call you, then, yeah?” He retracts his hands and they’re being shoved into pockets.

And you’re nodding at him, biting your lip to contain a dumb grin before he’s waving at you with both hands and walking backwards.

Boys were confusing, you decide. And you had never been that great with them, or confident. You realized early on people saw you as the ‘little sister type,’ you were always too sweet, and too soft and they were afraid of hurting you but you somehow ended up being hurt either way.

“Is being nice such a bad thing?” You grumble to yourself before kicking your phone away from you.


“Guys just aren’t into sweet girls, nowadays babe.” Krystal coos to you and she sends you a glare when you’re glancing back down at your phone. “Please don’t tell me you’re still waiting on Min fucking Yoongi’s call.”

“I’m sure he’ll call.” You grumble before flicking at your full glass of beer—if you left this one untouched again Krystal would probably force you to give her the six bucks it was worth but you didn’t do well with alcohol. “And what’s so horrible about being sweet?”

“Nothing!” Krystal jumps to reassure you, but you didn’t believe it this time around, “it’s just you’re the marrying type, you know? The good girl and not the kind that’s like only bad for daddy. You’re the kind of girl guys bring home to meet their mom.”

“So what am I supposed to do just never have sex until I’m married?” You sigh, before proceeding stubbornly, “I really liked Yoongi and I think he liked me too!”

“Maybe, I don’t know, change your image a little, so you’re not so girl next door,” you wince at her unintentional repetition of Yoongi’s earlier words but still, you glance from Krystal to yourself.

There was a vast difference in appearance, from her jeans that seemed to be painted on to her simple camisole top—her style was simplistic but emphatic, plus her model like looks didn’t hurt either. You on the either hand… you weren’t ugly, far from it and you knew that but like she said you were just so sweet looking and any attempts to dress sexy or posh like Krystal looked disturbing like a twelve year old trying on their big sisters clothes. So you stuck to flannels and mom jeans, boring but at least you didn’t look weird.


“But you know what,” Krystal chimes, interrupting your train of thought, “maybe you’re right. You have a good read on people. Yoongi’s a TA he’s probably swamped with work and honestly ___, I know you don’t know this but… you can be kind of intimidating.”

Even Krystal winces at her own lie but she pushes through it when she sees your eyes light up.

Me? Intimidating?” You repeat.

“Yeah!” She says, forcing enthusiasm. God why did you have to look so fucking adorable and doe-eyed it made it really hard to tell you the truth. “I mean, you give off this like too good for you church girl vibe you know? Like… ‘You can’t have my virginity, you gotta work for it in the name of Jesus!’”

You open your mouth and tilt your head at her, not entirely sure that was a compliment, but you never get a chance to ask your question because she’s barreling on.

“But tell you what” Krystal says brightly, “why don’t you forget Min Yoongi and let me introduce you to my friend Jimin.”

“Jimin?” You frown, you remember her mentioning something about him in the past, but it was always in passing and it never stuck.

“Yes, Jimin. He’s a freshman like you and he’s in my communications class.” And then suddenly her focus isn’t on you anymore, she’s too busy pulling up her Facebook on her phone to flash you a picture, “He’s sweet and he reminds me so much of you it’s crazy.”

“Then why don’t you date him.” You grumble stubbornly but she hears it and smacks you on the arm.

“Don’t sass me I’m only trying to help.” She rolls her eyes. “What do you think of him?”

You take the phone from her hands to get a better look at him and you cock your head to the side. He had a sweet looking face, so innocent and cherubic… he was attractive but you couldn’t imagine yourself kissing him and it made you wonder if that’s how people felt when they saw you? And then that made you sad, so you handed her phone back soundlessly.

“So?” she prods.

“He’s cute.” You relent with a shrug, but you feel unsure, uncomfortable and you loved Krystal to death but she had a way of… pushing her agenda on you.

And Park Jimin happened to be the first bullet point listed.

“Perfect I’ll text him and set up the date.” She says almost instantly and you’re clutching her wrist before she can do anything of the sort.

“But…”

“But?” she insists.

“He’s not my type.” You sigh, before adjusting the brim of your hat, and remind yourself that people—girls don’t wear hat in bars, at least not in the way you’ve styled it, with a half ass ponytail and some converse. You look like you’re about to babysit someone’s kid.

“What do you mean he’s not your type, ____?” Krystal scoffs in that way she does when she’s trying to give you tough love but you’re soft and it kind of hurts your feelings, “Why? Because he looks like he’ll actually return your texts?”

You look up at her on that note and you can tell she regrets the words almost as soon as they leave her mouth but it’s fine, it’s the truth, it’s not her fault you were sensitive. It doesn’t change the stiff smile you give her before nodding solemnly.

“I didn’t mean it like that—”

“I’m just gonna head to the bar, yeah?” You say with a lightness you don’t feel, and then you’re making your way over, pushing through throngs of sweaty, gyrating people in an attempt to forget that you were so easily undesirable. “Don’t wait up for me, I’ve got cab money.”


Jin loved and hated college night. Because it was fun, he didn’t go out much these days, at least not in the way he used to in his college days so he got to be apart of the party without actually… being in the party. But at the same time, the bar was slammed, the waitresses had them overflowing with orders not to mention the orders from patrons, impatiently flagging him down—on top of all that they were short a bar back so Jin was running back and forth to try and fill orders as well as making sure they stayed afloat with liquor and beer. But he was used to this. This was his life, it was fun and exciting and busy and he enjoyed his work. So he navigated smoothly, managing to pick up forgotten orders and stop more than one drunken fight.

“We’re eighty-six on Malibu and pine.” someone calls over his shoulder and he turns back smoothly, cocking a brow.

“The Malibu or the pine?” He scoffs.

“Both!”

“What the fuck are they doing in the back? Snorting it?” Jin groans before doubling back to cancel all ten orders of Malibu and pine because college girls loved that shit and would run it through an IV if they could.

It isn’t until he’s about all but cleared the raging hormonal fucks from his bar that he finally spots you, you’re so tiny he probably would’ve missed you if it wasn’t for the added height of the barstool, still he makes sure to check you when he doubles back.

“Hey, you doing okay? What can I get for—whoa.” He says before throwing the dishrag over his shoulder. He rubs a hand behind his neck before tipping his head at you, “You mind if I uh, see I.D.?”

You almost don’t hear him over the rushing over your ears because he’s beautiful enough to induce that type of reaction. His hair is platinum blonde and disheveled and he somehow manages to make perspiration look like a glowy, sparkling mist kissing his skin but mostly his cheekbones. His cheeks are flushed from exertion and he licks his lips, waiting for you to respond but you were caught up in the veins of his arm, and the way they danced their way up under the rolled sleeves of his dress shirts.

“I-… I sorry…” you stammer and it’s not from nervousness, not that kind, because you don’t like him, you’re not attracted to him. But he just has one of those faces. The kind that’s so beautiful it’s almost shocking and you think about how good he’d look with Krystal before handing him over your drivers license.

“21.” He hums, glancing at your picture before back at you, “A good year. Sorry about that, you look really, really young. The last thing I need are the cops in this place, you understand.”

You nod quietly and don’t mention that he was kind of rude, because you were used to it.

“So what can I get you?” He asks, and the bar is dead enough now that he can brace two arms on it and relax for one fucking second.

“Can I just get whatever you have on tap?” You ask and you to raise your voice from practice, from years of being told you’re too soft spoken.

“You got it.”

It isn’t another minute before he’s setting your beer down in front of you and unlike the last that Krystal has plied you with you actually drink this one because you want to, because you’re sad and you deserve it. Your brain is swimming with countless thoughts of Yoongi, some of Krystal and the boy she wanted to set you up with—jimmy? You couldn’t remember his name, but you should probably take her up on it because unlike you, your friends had an unlikely knack for actually finding guys that were interested in you. The only thing was you were rarely ever interested in them. Was it so bad to want to explore outside of your league of accountants and research assistants? You were 21, you wanted fun, and despite Krystal’s insistence on you being the marrying type and scaring guys off, it wasn’t like you wanted to get married right now either.

No. You just wanted sex. A hookup, a boyfriend. Fuck something.

Somewhere along the way your one beer had doubled and then tripled until you were leaning your face on your palm and close to falling asleep on the bar. Because you weren’t a loud drunk, God no, even inebriated you couldn’t express yourself properly and while you couldn’t handle your alcohol you at least weren’t sloppy or messy. Just a little drowsy and slightly disheveled, which is what drew Jin to you when the night was dying down and he was tallying the nights receipts against the bar, ready to close out.

“Hey,” he calls out, tapping the brim of your hat when you don’t respond right away and you’re startled into a state of awareness when he’s leaning on his elbows to talk to you, “you good? You got a friend, boyfriend here to take you home? Or you need a cab.”

Your patting your cheeks to wake you up before shaking your head, “Sorry are you guys closing? I’m just gonna wal—”

“Please don’t.” He sighs and your raising a brow at him, “it’d be mighty inconvenient for me if you were drunk and murdered and my bar was tied to your case on the front page news.”

You glare at him before sweeping bangs from your face, “How considerate of you.”

“Can’t have anyone sullying our good name—even patrons.” He grins before nodding at you, “Let me call you a cab.”

“I told you I’ll be fine. I don’t have money for one anyway. I spent it all on your overpriced alcohol.”

“It’s overpriced because we don’t water it down like the other bars on this block. Besides no one told your broke ass to go drinking, I should just let you get murdered, little girl.” He retorts, and he’s almost amused by how you’re glaring at him, “But you remind me of my niece so I won’t.”

It was poor timing on his part. Because while it wasn’t this bartender—who, now that you glanced at his name tag, you knew as Jin instead of 'blonde asshole'—who was responsible for years and years of being compared to things like babies and puppies and nieces and sisters and just fucking the most platonic and non-fuckable things on the planet, life was all about timing. You knew that better than anyone because you apparently were shit at. And so was he. Because with all the liquor and bottled up emotions coming to a head and years of just sheer frustration of being treated like a kid when you were a grown ass woman, you started spilling over.

“You’re a real jerk, you know that?” You spew and while he’s slightly surprised by your outburst, he’s had enough years training with drunks that he masks it well, “Don’t you think that makes me feel like shit? I’m not someone’s niece or kid sister or a goddamn puppy! I’m a woman. Who wants things and has dreams and aspirations and fucking job and apartment and desires. Like actual, real dick me down desires but I can’t ever say any of that because it’s weird because I’m everyone’s kid sister. Well news fucking flash I’m not. I’m not the girl next door, I’m just a regular person who is trying and failing to get laid and people like you are the reason I can’t.”

Jin blinks at you at a few times before raising a hand at the staff who were still straggling behind, picking up here and there and openly staring at you.

“Me?” He repeats, “I’m the sole purpose that your sex life—or rather lack thereof, is failing?”

“Not you, per se but people like you!” You point an accusing finger at him before leaning back with a pout and Jin wonders if you know how childish you look.

Jin closes his eyes because he did not need this shit but the quicker he got you to spill the quicker he got you the fuck out of here and he was on his merry fucking way. He rubs the back of his head before gesturing to you.

“Go ahead.” He sighs, “Unload, then.”

“Try not to sound so enthusiastic about it.” You grunt.

“Well excuse the fuck out of me, Jan, I just finished a ten hour shift and despite what quirky sitcoms suggest bartenders aren’t actually here to listen to your problems, in fact we don’t want to, I sure as fuck don’t make a therapist salary and even therapist have to go see therapist because people dump on them so much. So no I’m not too fucking fond of hearing your shitty boy problems but lay them on me so I can clock the fuck out and go to bed.” He sighs.

“Jan?” You frown.

“You know,” he says, gesturing wildly, “from the Brady Bunch. She was the much younger, much uglier sister, always bitching about Marcia? Doesn’t ring a bell—how fucking old are you?

“Not old enough.” You scoff, “And are you calling me ugly?”

“I’m calling you a brat,” he corrects, “now spill. Who’s the guy?”

You bite your lip for a moment before eyeing him suspiciously, “He’s my TA.”

“So an older dude, I’m assuming.” Jin reasons, “And what? Is he leading you around by the tail?”

It was such an outdated phrase that you wince at his age showing, making him glare.

“He said he would call and he didn’t.” You explain before letting out an exasperated sigh, “But the date went so well! And he was always so nice to me in class and when I asked him out at the party he said yes and he was so affectionate. And then before the night ended he kissed me on the forehead, which God! I know screams platonic but my friend Jisoo said she knows a girl who knows this guy who has a cousin who’s sister used to always get forehead kissed by this dude so she thought they were friends and then five years down the road they ended up getting married—”

“Okay stop.” Jin says, waving a hand in front of you before pinching the bridge of his nose, “When you asked him out at the party did he happen to be drunk?”

“He seemed buzz but I—”

“Were there a lot of people around when you did it?” He sighed.

“I mean his friends, yeah but what does that have to do wit—”

“It was a pity date.” Jin says firmly and your narrowing your eyes on him.

“How do you know that?” You glare, “Maybe he likes me—”

“You put him in an uncomfortable position and when I look at you I look at a girl that while I wouldn’t date you I wouldn’t go out of my way to like fucking crush your spirits.” He explains, “He went on the date out of obligation but he’s not returning your calls because he wasn’t feeling it.”

“But he could have not returned my calls for any reason!” You argue.

Seokjin pins you with a bored expression, “Name one.”

“He could’ve been busy at work, or maybe I missed it and it went to voicemail or maybe he got hit by a car and died! I don’t know!”

“Kid,” Jin sighs, “If it looks like shit, and it smells like shit it’s probably shit. He’s dodging you because he doesn’t want you.”

You pretend not to feel the sharp tug of pain at his words and barrel on, plied with liquid courage, “But I told you! I knew this girls who knew this girl—”

“There will always be girls who know girls who know girls who have been in the exact shitty situation that you have been in that ended up with a happy ending.” Jin laughs bitterly before jabbing a finger at the pristine surface of the bar, “But they’re the exception and you’re the rule.”

“What’s the rule?” You querie.

“That if a guy wants you he’ll bust ass to prove it to you.” Jin states, “Women claim men are simple creatures but love to complicate the facts.”

“Well how do you know I’m not an exception too?” You implore stubbornly.

“Because, if we were all exceptions then there wouldn’t be a rule, now would there?” Jin says, tonguing his cheek as he leaned back against the opposite bar. “Who is this guy? I’ll tell you if he’s an ass or not, I have a way of telling through names.”

“Yoongi.” You say softly but you’re looking down at the smooth surface of the bar so you don’t see Jin’s eyebrows raise in amusement.

“Min Yoongi?” Jin presses and your head is lifting hopefully.

“You know him?” You ask.

“He’s a regular here. We’ve hung out a couple times. He’s too old for you.” Jin says and he hopes its off putting enough, because he knows Yoongi, knows the kind of guy he is, birds of a feather flock together after all.

And while you were bratty and kind of annoying, whether you liked it or not you really did have an endearing sister trait to you. Now Jin wasn’t necessarily gonna prostrate himself to protect you, but he’d give you advice, warn you off the guy if he could, save a good kid like you from a heartbreak.

You were too soft, too innocent and not the kind, guys like him or Yoongi, wanted to corrupt. Not the sex kitten type. No you were Lilly white, virginal type and Jin wasn’t the best of the best but he didn’t stray that far from the light.

“It’s only a four years.” You argue, and Jin pretends not to notice the soft smile that comes to your face when you talk about Yoongi.

“I’m gonna be real with you because your friends probably won’t be and I’m breaking every guy code there is out there by doing this but—” your smile slips and Jin pushes on, “He’s not going to call you and before you told me his name I was half sure of that but now I’m positive because I know Yoongi and you’re not his type.”

“And what’s his type?”

Jin glances down at your chest and you follow his line of gaze before flushing when he raises his brow at you. Your hands flutter around your flannel until your pulling it closed tightly and Jin’s rolling his eyes at you.

“Slutty.” Jin says bluntly. “So do yourself a favor and find another guy, preferably one that’s into you, around your age and not an asshole.”

You don’t look back up at him after that, because even drunk you still had your pride, and shame was burning a dark course across your cheeks, barely concealed by the low brim of your hat. So instead, you push back from your stool before sending him a gracious smile.

“Thanks Jin.” You say honestly before grabbing your purse, “I’ll just… be on my way.”

“Wait!” He’s stopping you with a hand and you blink up at him, “Let me call you a cab, on the house for like breaking your heart and shit.”

“I live down the street and one of my friends is just getting out of the club next door.” You lie. “I’ll be fine.”

He lets you go but he does it eyeing you suspiciously with an accusing finger in your direction, “Don’t get murdered… or else.”

“Got ya..” You roll your eyes and then your pushing it out of the bar and into the cold, windy streets with a sigh. Your heart wasn’t broken, it wasn’t. You were disappointed at best, you just thought that you deserved at least an explanation, right?


new drabble/au series!!!!! eeeeepppppppp theres maybe a two more chapters??? hopefully !!!! 

texts from last night! meme

[text] Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?

[text] The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here

[text] He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.

[text] I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW

[text] So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one’s for Team USA.

[text] He gave me the “find somebody who wants to date you for who you are” speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.

[text] I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese

[text] I just got high off one hit and then Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refrigerator and researching ways to replace it

[text] Seriously. I’m like, “Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you’re so fucking intelligent I’m turned on?”

[text] Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?

[text] He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I’m keeping him.

[text] I’m making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.

[text] It’s a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.

[text] Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I’ve been waiting for this moment forever.

[text] Lesson learned. Don’t roleplay with a real knife.

[text] We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman’s birthday party for the food. Whoops.

[text] He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.

[text] I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I’d say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.

[text] I’m wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.

[text] He’s like… An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It’s almost unsettling

[text] I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I’ve found the One.

[text] Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while… if you happen to find your balls then join us

[text] i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled “dibs!”…

[text] and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered “Simba”

[text] so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.

[text] Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.

[text] Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me

[text] We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sounds logical. Thank you daylight savings.

[text] when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was “chug-a-lug”

[text] There’s a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.

[text] Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine

[text] My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.

[text] He told me he loved me. I didn’t know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him

[text] Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten

[text] Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.

[text] He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.

[text] we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I’ve ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury

[text] I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man’s heart.

[text] When was the last time you wore pants?

[text] I’ve replaced you with thin mints and masturbation

[text] Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.

[text] Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time

[text] Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent

[text] We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.

[text] I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how’s your day going?

[text] I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn’t need it today.

[text] We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What’s wrong with this tradition?

[text] all i’ve had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.

[text] Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don’t exist?

[text] Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special

[text] And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention

[text] This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the “High While Analyzing Disney Movies” texts begin.

[text] Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won’t quit poking me on fb

[text] I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes

[text] One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won’t be me. I’m drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.

[text] You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy

[text] im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster

[text] just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.

[text] I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on

[text] Let’s play a little game called “Chill the Fuck Out” - you’re our first contestant

[text] Didn’t get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.

[text] I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.

[text] you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat

[text] tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?

[text] We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out

[text] maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game

[text] i think its awesome that according to your mom i’m your friend that caught on fire.

[text] So fucked up. Can’t tell if I’m starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.

[text] I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.

[text] Vodka is such a love hate relationship.

[text] you traded sex for a burrito?

[text] I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.

[text] You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.

[text] it’s not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.

[text] You’re always adorable, but when you’re drunk, you’re like Chia Pet adorable.

[text] this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest

[text] I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box

[text] I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old’s Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.

[text] It’s like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it’s gummy bears and instead of milk it’s vodka.

[text] You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go

[text] Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.

[text] we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying “i mean who doesn’t like cheetos”

[text] quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you

[text] I left a cheeto on everyone’s car trailing to the house i’m at, hanzel and gretel style.

[text] Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.

[text] nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs

[text] When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.

[text] kinda considering buying a life alert for sophomore year

[text] My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.

[text] Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.

[text] you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing ‘follow the yellowbrick road’. i’m pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted

[text] It’s like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.

[text] did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?

[text] The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.

[text] I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!

[text] You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.

[text] I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.

[text] So I woke up today with someone’s door knob in my pocket. I hope everybody else got out of the house ok.

[text] So we successfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.

[text] Because when I say 'You shouldn’t drink anymore’, she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks’

[text] okay, this game isn’t funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.

[text] The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.

[text] when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed

[text] so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.

[text] You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone

[text] never. drinking. again.

[text] I’m gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.

[text] got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night

[text] I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now

[text] i’m out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.

[text] Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.

In honor of Annabeth’s birthday I wrote a little fic, it’s in the same timeline as this fic you don’t have to read it to understand this fic, but it would give you a better understanding of the plot. This story was supposed to be written last year but I had a little accident with scissors and my had and I wasn’t able to write. Huge thanks to @quietlykeen for being my beta and to @nerdyadventures to allow me to yell my writing frustrations at her, you guys are the best <3


It’s not that she was expecting her friends to do something for her birthday…but she was kind of expecting them to do something for her birthday and a part of her felt guilty for thinking like that.  They had asked her if she had wanted to spend her birthday in Xcaret, a natural water park, but Annabeth had politely declined. She wasn’t a big fan of her birthday, she usually spent it at camp where her cabin and friends celebrate her during the campfire but with the loom of the war coming, her last few birthdays had barely been acknowledged. There was also the fact she didn’t like to remember her last birthday, her seventeenth one. She didn’t even realize her birthday had passed until she and Percy had been safe and sound in the Argo II and they had realized what day it was and honestly, she felt like there was nothing to celebrate. She wasn’t sure why she declined to celebrate her eighteenth birthday at the water park but it just didn’t feel right. Her friends did the second best they could, they went to Xcaret the day before her birthday and they spoil her and let her choose where to go first.

She wasn’t gonna lie, she absolutely enjoyed the day they spent there. It was a happy thought knowing it was just a normal day of her friends hanging out not celebrating her. They had arrived home late that night, all tired and happy and ready for bed time…well almost everyone. The day at the underwater rivers and the ocean had filled Percy with energy and while the others were sleeping in their rooms, Annabeth had started her birthday with her boyfriend between her legs. Annabeth wasn’t surprised to wake up when the sun was all the way up, her body aching from a mix of the day before and Percy worshiping her at night.

“Hey, sleeping beauty.” Annabeth turned to where Percy’s voice came from he was leaning against the bathroom frame door, and Annabeth took a few seconds to appreciate her boyfriend; his jeans hung low on his hips, the waistband of his boxers peeking out from under them. Excluding a shirt resting on his shoulder, his torso was naked. Annabeth smiled at the sight of his abs, his hair wet from the shower or from the ocean, she wasn’t sure. “You missed breakfast.”

Annabeth picked up her phone, the numbers 11:35 AM making her groan. “I guess I have you to blame for that, don’t I?”

He smirked at her. “I didn’t hear you complaining about keeping you up last night.” Annabeth threw him a pillow, but sleep was still in her body and the pillow didn’t reach him. He laughed at her. “Come on, are you gonna stay all day in bed? We are all being lazy in the living room.”

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Better than Bullets

Tag LIst: (Message to be added)  @thebeautyofthomas @frustratedwaffle @killerfangirl3 @pippa-frost @extreme-doodles @fandomsofrandom @here-to-vent @i-prayed-to-you-cas @pro-fangirls-unsocial-life @justanotherpurplebutterfly @emovirgil @aikogumi @mysticalcatamount@fallingineternity @notallpotatoesarefrenchfries

Pairing: Moxiety (platonic or romantic, though intended as platonic), brief mentions of Logince (also platonic)

CW: Startled response, horror movie mention, horror movie plot mention

Categories: Fluff, humor

Notes: A quick lil’ thing before I head off on vacation. I’ll probably have time to write while I’m there but just in case I wanted to get one more quick story up. 

*

The good news was he’d gotten Virgil to agree to a movie night, just the two of them, in honor of the anxious side’s upcoming favorite holiday: Halloween. 

The better news was that Virgil was feeling so relaxed with Patton these days that, halfway through the evening, he had drifted off, curled up with his head on Patton’s shoulder and his arm draped over his waist. 

The bad news was that the nonstop Halloween specials that were currently cycling through the TV in the commons had taken a turn, and instead of the relatively benign features like Hocus Pocus and The Nightmare Before Christmas, the TV was now showing Child’s Play

And the worst news of all: the remote was out of reach, and Logan and Roman were having a bonding night of their own, immersed in strategy games and well out of earshot in Logan’s realm. 

Which mean that Patton had two choices: he could shift Virgil away from him in order to get the remote, risking waking him up and ensuring that their cuddling would be over for the night–unthinkable–or he could…could…

Watch Chucky. 

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The Christmas Spirt

Prompt: “You remind me of the Grinch, you know? Except his heart grows three sizes and you stay and asshole.”

Warnings: swearing, angst, a little bit of fluff

Word Count: 2082 (oops)

A/N: i love christmas so much (maybe a little too much) this is for @nataliarxmanxva ‘s writing challenge

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The First Time

The first time James saw her, she was frowning. Stood by the Hogwarts Express, with her her fiery red hair plaited haphazardly into two braids, she appeared to be arguing with a blonde girl who he guessed must be her sister. He watched as the aforementioned blonde- who was wearing a particularly sour expression- sneered something at her and stormed off, leaving the red-head’s shoulders to slump as she hugged her parents goodbye. James wondered if her sister was always that stroppy.

The first time she laid eyes on him, he was laughing. Stood outside the compartment she was sat in with Sev, his hair a haphazard mess as he chatted with an aristocratic boy who looked liked he belonged to a rich family. He wore expensive robes and rounded glasses like her father did, but that didn’t fool her; she knew by their smirks that they were troublemakers- boys her mother warned her to stay away from- and Lily hoped they wouldn’t sit in her compartment.

The first time they scowled at each other, she was filled with pride as the hat called GRYFFINDOR! and he watched her hurry over to the table he was sat at. He wondered if she’d come and sit by him, but from the way her nose wrinkled as their eyes met, he figured she probably wouldn’t. Strange, he thought, as she glared up at him from the table. No one had ever disliked him before. He glared back anyway.

The first time they smiled at each other, they had just stopped Mulciber from hexing a Hufflepuff boy in their Care of Magical Creatures lesson. Who knew two first years could pull off a Twitchy-ears hex on a third year? As he ran off, red-faced and clutching his ears, they couldn’t help but share a smile. They knew payback would most likely be coming, but they couldn’t help a small moment of victory.

The first time they argued with each other, it happened in the middle of the Gryffindor common room, and had something to do with Severus. No one really understood what had happened over the spitting of insults between the pair, but they couldn’t understand how James Potter wasn’t afraid of the furious red-head, (though he was secretly marvelling at the pretty girl who was surprisingly as sharp-tongued as Sirius). When wands were drawn, it was Remus who split it up.

The first time they laughed with each other was in third year. After two years of rivalry, it came as a shock to the whole of Gryffindor when Lily Evans and James Potter both burst out laughing at an apparently ‘hilarious’ expression Sirius Black was wearing. The disgruntled victim thought they’d been hit by a cheering charm, which only made the pair laugh harder. They went back to their feud the very next day.

The first time they were partnered up together was in potions class. She decided he was a ‘big-headed idiot’ as they bickered over which ingredients to put in the potion, and he refused to let her stir. He concluded she was a ‘right know-all’, but he couldn’t deny he liked her sarcastic streak- not that he’d ever tell her that.  A row ensued when their potion exploded all over their desk, and Slughorn decided he wouldn’t pair them up again.

The first time he asked her out had been in fourth year. It had sort of- somehow- slipped out mid-argument, and after surprise had flashed in her eyes she’d replied ‘never in your wildest dreams’. To cover up his disappointment, James had made it a running joke from then on, though his pride had been hurt for at least a month.

The first time they pranked someone together, their victim was Bellatrix. It had to be- it was, of course, her last day, and she definitely deserved it. The bucket of maple syrup and feathers had been James’s idea, but the finishing touch of the Tarantallegra charm had been Lily’s. James had stated she’d done a “Good job, Evans”, rather begrudgingly. She’d held back a grin.

The first time they snuck out together, it was to collect chocolates for Remus on his birthday, in fifth year. Lily had once stated she’d “never go under Potter’s invisibility cloak”, which he happily reminded her of multiple times on the journey. They may or may not have eaten some of the chocolate on the way back, but Remus didn’t mind. In fact, Lily had never seen him happier.

The first time they cried together was the sixth year, just before they left for Christmas, when James’s father had passed away. She’d found him by the fire and sat with him until morning, both pretending they weren’t scared of this war as they clutched hands. Lily visited him for the first time that holiday, with a bouquet of flowers for his mum.

The first time they got drunk together they played exploding snap in Lily’s dorm until three a.m. The game ended when Sirius and Marlene started making out a little too ferociously, and Peter passed out on the floor, snoring. Remus and James helped carry him back to their dorm and Lily went to bed with her heart beating quickly and a smile on her face.

The first time they went on a date, it wasn’t planned. Well, not by them at least. Their friends abandoned them, leaving them red-cheeked when they cottoned on. They’d gone to the Three broomsticks anyway, and laughed until they cried over a pitcher of butterbeer. James couldn’t help but feel he was falling completely, and Lily decided that maybe her heart had thawed a little for the boy she once loathed. Their friends wore smug looks for a fortnight afterwards.

The first time they kissed, it was Lily who initiated it, surprisingly. They’d been skipping around each other for weeks, and she finally had the guts to do it at a celebratory quidditch party when she was (more than a little bit) tipsy, and decided she had nothing to lose. It was sloppy and haphazard, but Lily thought her insides might explode. James wouldn’t stop grinning.

The first time he told her he loved her, they were seventeen. She was sprawled on the grass, a book in her hand and her hair fanning out behind her. He’d known it for a long time, he realised, looking at the concentration on her face. It seemed to slip off his tongue so easily that he didn’t even realise it had been said. Lily whispered it back as she entwined her hands around his neck and their lips connected.

The first time they had sex it was awkward and embarrassing, but pleasant at the same time. It wasn’t anything like they’d seen in muggle movies; there was giggling, (mostly on Lily’s part, much to the annoyance of James), and low murmurs of encouragement, but by the time they were done both were smiling. The second time was much, much better.

The first time they saw their baby, they were twenty years old. Lily never thought she could love someone as much as she loved James, but oh, how wrong she was. As they held their son between them, she never thought she could love anything quite as much as her two boys, with their messy dark hair and beautiful hearts. She thought her own heart might explode with the strength of her love.

The last time they saw each other she was cradling their little baby in her arms. And, as the wand was pointed at his face, no one could know how James wished he’d turned to look at her just one last time before she’d left the room- even though he didn’t really need to. As his eyes closed, a picture of her was burned into his mind, as bright as the sun.

Until they saw each other again.