whenever you have time/energy for it, could you talk about headcanons for if hera somehow got a physical body? no rush, just wanna know what you have to say on the matter
(not quite sure whether this is headcanons or a ficlet? or whether it’s at all what you had in mind? but boy, do I have Thoughts about AIs and their relationship to humanity and Hera in particular, and that comes through here.)
Hera’s first concern when they start talking about making her a body is that she wants to design it herself.
it isn’t that she doesn’t want a body. and it isn’t that she doesn’t want to be able to engage in the kind of comforting physical socializing all of her friends use their bodies for – she really, really wants to finally high five Eiffel, for one thing.
(he started leaving handprints on the Hephaestus’ monitors within a month of the day they met.)
but Hera knows what kind of shape they’d think of for her – not maliciously, she knows they love her, but it’s like the words they didn’t give her, the mind they did – they only ever conceptualize one shape, one kind of body, one way of being.
Hera doesn’t want a body so she can be more human, doesn’t want to be a pretty little android. she doesn’t want a body that proves that she’s just like all of them, because she’s not. Hera wants a body that makes her more Hera.
it does not need to move or look like anything human beings have referent for, although she pulls inspiration from everything from plants to animals to industrial engineering (anything she thinks seems cool, honestly; she confesses this to Eiffel but would never admit it to Minkowski, and she’s not lying when she tells Renee that she has a coherent functional and aesthetic goal. and she’s quite proud of it, in the end). Hera does not want a body so she can be a person (she knows she is already a person); Hera wants a body to do the things she can’t without one.
she is so hungry for experience, for seeing and feeling and doing – now that the station is no longer a part of her, now that so much of her mind and identity are not occupied with a million calculations and routines and consciousnesses keeping the Hephaestus running, now that she finally gets to decide for herself what she wants to do – she realizes she wants to do everything.
Hera’s body is built to house any sense they could think of, all that freed-up processing power devoted to every kind of experience - vision in spectrums beyond human comprehension, as many tactile sensors as they could cram in, temperature, electrical impulses, electromagnetic waves, even taste, of course taste, she has spent almost her entire life listening to her best friend describe food, like she would miss out on that entire slice of what the universe has to offer
and she thought space was full! she never understood how it could be called a void, called emptiness – but suddenly it makes sense why people would say that, because even with the limits of a human body, there is so much – this world is so much, every square inch of it, and just going fifty feet down a street is such a kaleidoscope of incredible things. it is awe-inspiring and disgusting and painful and amazing and beautiful and she is full of wonder at it.
(there is so much in this world that she is the first person ever to know. there are so many experiences so intrinsic to life here that no one thinks about them and that she is feeling and wondering at for the first time.)
people do not generally find it a comforting body. hera doesn’t care; she didn’t build it for them, and her friends don’t care, either, and that’s all that matters. she has an emotional body language of her own which Minkowski can read as easily as her own humanoid shoulder shrugs and eyerolls. Doug does not seem at all to mind sitting back in his apartment, propped up against her humming-warm metal side as he dozes in front of the TV, as long as she has all the right appendages to give him a hug.
(Lovelace will walk down the street next to her as naturally as though she was any ordinary human being in the world; and Hera’s senses can easily read the tenseness, like coiled springs, in her step as she does. but she also knows there is nothing defensive there, only a fierce pride, now, in both of them, for knowing and deciding who and what they are. daring the world to try and tell them differently. Hera and Lovelace understand each other really well these days.)
and it’s nice, she finds, nicer than she expected, to be able to stretch limbs and feel the brush of textures and the weight of physicality and think this is mine. this is me. it is something she could never feel with the Hephaestus, which was always neither her body nor something she simply piloted, but frustratingly in between. there’s comfort in this clearer delineation of what is and isn’t Hera, in her own right to decide what shape that space takes.
hands, she tells them, are very useful for doing all kinds of things, as humans prove, and were an obvious choice to include in her design.
First three have to do with a conversation with myself and @salamiac if Peso was a little spirit haunting the theatre! Seems he likes to possess Styria a bit too much. >:3c
Next, a little sketch of Ringmaster Coops, then the ol’ Sitcom Duo who are forced to be straight- Sitcom Coops and Sitcom Cilantro- (Cilantro belonging to @zoewhite4815) and then a small Ceres!
Third row, Buko and Dmitry, Dmitry also belonging to Zoe, Hugh in a Cup, and another Buko sketch!
The Gorillaz band and their shitty roommate habits
-2D’s sleep schedule is awful, sometimes he’s up at 4am just walking around the apartment unable to sleep. But he stomps around the apartment and wakes everyone up at night because he can’t walk quietly for crap.
-Noodle is a major bathroom hog. She’ll take baths and showers for close to 2 hours, and you’ve got the boys just waiting outside, banging on the door for her to hurry up because they all have to take a piss.
-Nobody – nobody – labels the stuff they put into the fridge. So sometimes one of them is looking for something to eat and they’ll just pull out someone’s leftovers from like four months ago, or find an old milk carton that expired ten days ago, and there are always issues of stolen food, because no one knows whose stuff is whose.
-You can always tell when Russel’s been in the kitchen cooking himself breakfast or making himself a sandwich because he leaves crumbs all over the damn counter and always forgets to wipe it down when he’s done.
-2D and Russel are the only ones who remember to do the dishes. Murdoc just slams them in the sink and expects other people to do them, and Noodle kinda just leaves them on the table and rushes off to do something else without even trying to put them in the sink.
-Murdoc’s. Toe nail clippings. Wind up. Everywhere. He always claims he throws them out, but everyone is convinced that he’s just lying like always.
-Noodle sheds so much damn hair. It’s always all over the sink, in the shower drain, on the floor of the bathroom, hell Murdoc swears that he found some of her hair in his underwear drawer and literally no one in the house knows how the hell that happened because Noodle has never stepped foot in his room.
-The capacity of the DVR is always at like 90% because Russel records so many shows and so many sitcoms and he keeps all of the episodes, and there isn’t any room for anything else. He’s super picky about people deleting things without telling him too.
-Noodle and Russel are the only ones who consistently use and empty the ash trays. Murdoc and 2D never bother to empty them, and when they’re full, they just start ashing their cigarettes on the couch or on the coffee table, and it especially drives Russel freaking insane.
-No one can agree on a thermostat temperature. No one. Someone is always unhappy.
If You’ve Never Heard of Sabrina Collins, I’m Gonna Change That
There was a time when sitcoms were freaking awesome and didn’t have stupid titles. That time was 2010 - 2014 when FOX had Raising Hope, a show that was super freaking smart and loving and wonderful, and I’ll never be over its cancellation last year. I dare say it was the best show to premiere in the decade. Because it was such a loving and positive show, it gave us three epic female characters. One of those was Sabrina Collins, the character a cynic would write off as a “love interest.” But the more astute viewer knows that from the beginning, Sabrina was more than that. Sabrina is smart, tough, creative, genuine, and terribly insecure – sounds like all the legendary women out there, doesn’t it?
One of the things that’s so great about Sabrina is that she’s gleefully weird. She’s a real weirdo, and she’s OK with that. She comes from a multi-million dollar family, but all that high society stuff doesn’t appeal to her. A picture where everyone’s matching and smiling? That’s not what Sabrina wants. She prefers it when things are out of the ordinary. She likes when people are considered “crazy.” That’s not because she likes to make fun of them. Oh, no. Sabrina likes weird because she would be bored with anything else. She’s the kind of character who reminds us that “weird” isn’t an insult. It’s a compliment because it implies that the weird is one with the joy. Only a gleefully weird person would pretend to be a Russian lady on a trip to Vegas just ‘cause. She’s always willing to put on a show or take part in a crazy scheme because it brings her joy. And why shouldn’t it? It just showcases her creativity more. Oh, let’s talk about Sabrina’s creativity for a spell. She’s a natural-born writer, which I’m inclined to mention. It always makes me so mad that this wasn’t explored more, but it’s clear from the beginning that Sabrina loves words and wants to use them a lot. It’s like Jimmy said. She could win an Oscar. I’d like to think that she and Jimmy are writing and illustrating children’s books together now. That’s what Sabrina is meant to do. She’s meant to have ideas and write about them. I mean, the Hillary Clinton play was freaking awesome. Imagine how much else she could do. Couple that with her eccentric personality, and you’ve got the next Newbery medal winner.
Sabrina could be a Vampire Slayer if there were vampires in Natesville. She is so strong and determined, and I am thankful that even for four, short years, she was a character on television. We need more tiny, physically strong characters like her, and I’m not just saying this because (as we all know) I’m a Buffy person. There are so many girls out there who look like Sabrina who think they could never defend themselves. But Sabrina reminds you that you can and you should. In season four, she tries to play the damsel in distress to make Jimmy feel better about himself, but she just can’t. She’s the hero of this story, and she’ll do the saving if she wants. And she does want. That’s just who Sabrina is, and I am glad she is that way. She has this pluck that doesn’t come out all the time, but when it does, I’m always like, “Did she really just do that?” And ask around – I have seen this show about twenty times. She is a maternal warrior, even if she doesn’t like to admit it. When the four, core adults in the show are trapped in the attic because of an incident with, um, mongooses, Sabrina is the one to burst through the ceiling because they couldn’t just die up there and leave Hope an orphan. And in the final season, Sabrina becomes fixated on taking Hope on a proper vacation… so fixated that she chases a big man on a motorcycle. That’s tough. Also, it reminds me a lot of the show’s matriarch, Virginia, who is fan-freaking-tastic. Sabrina is just as tough and epic and awesome. She deserves a legacy.
But Sabrina is so beautifully flawed. Not many sitcoms show a deeper side to the characters, but Raising Hope did, namely with Sabrina. The second season essentially opens with discovering Sabrina’s affluent origins and how she renounced them because she’s not about that life. But as the episode goes on, we notice that Sabrina feels insecure for giving up the money because she’s not as pretty, privileged, or educated as the people she went to high school with. As a result of her insecurity, she bullies her old friends ruthlessly. That’s not right. Even still, she discloses to Jimmy that she thinks she’s better than everyone at Howdy’s – even him. She doesn’t understand how to love herself, and when she breaks down yelling, “Fine, Jimmy, everyone’s just better than me!” it’s heartbreaking. You’re mad at her, but you understand. It’s hard to accept that you’re not perfect, which Sabrina can never do despite this moment. However, it is the finest moment on the show, and the subsequent montage to “Losers” by The Belle Brigade is genius. Sabrina doesn’t understand that perfection isn’t real. She strives for it, and it might kill her. It’s admirable to be that determined, but she’s a little self-destructive. Perhaps we should let her borrow a little Gilbert and Gubar?
Raising Hope was just a fantastic show – in part, thanks to Sabrina. I can’t recommend this show any more (seriously, it’s 88 episodes on Netflix, and my fantasy is to get it popular post-mortem so they renew it for a Netflix season). Sabrina is such an admirable character for girls and women everywhere. She tries so hard to be the best person she can be, but she reminds us that the Angel in the House is a real thing. I love Sabrina, and I will stand behind her even when her straight-man comedy irks the crap out of me. She’s too strong, independent, and clever for me to dislike her. Four seasons was definitely not enough for this gem, but one episode was enough to make Sabrina Collins a legendary character.
“Oh, I don’t know - I just like watching them together with you!”
No but seriously, Greg is a wonderful portrayal of a father. I’ve said it before but it bears repeating: he’s one of the very few good dads on television. So often are they made out to be these characters who are straight up stupid and don’t really care that much about their family (Family Guy, Simpsons, American Dad, so many sitcoms) - they’d rather sit on the sofa and watch television than spend any amount of time with their family, and they make stupid decisions for the sake of making stupid decisions. And sure, some of those shows are meant to be funny - that’s all well and good. But popular media is really lacking in the father figure department, and Greg really picks it up.
The only other dad I can think of off the top of my head is probably Bob of Bob’s Burgers - the show is silly, but it’s a real family and Bob genuinely cares, and that’s one of the major reasons it’s another favourite show of mine.
i was thinking about the whole “kirkwall krew as a sitcom thing” and i couldnt stop
-it would be kinda similar to ‘how i met your mother’ with varric telling cass about what happened and occasionally showing cass’s reactions
-it being a running gag that fenris and/or isabela can’t say “i love you” or even “i like you”. “i…don’t.. dislike…apples.”
-an episode about failing stealth missions bc of their outfits. isabela’s heavy jewelry. anders’ feathers shedding. seb shining. rogue hawke’s buckles. hawke tries to put every one in plain black outfits, but even then they find ways to fail
-incompetant templars being the butt of so many jokes
Hey Dan, I'm curious: why do you LOVE Hillary so much? I mean, I obviously see that Trump is trash and she is the better option. What I don't understand is that you are not from the US (nor I), so why are you sooo deeply invested into their politics?
I’ve always been an America-phile, so anything and everything US interests be greatly. Added to which, the US is one of, if not the, leading world Superpower, so what happens over there does affect what happens here.
As for Hillary herself, I’ve always found her fascinating. Growing up, I knew of her as the First Lady, but never really knew anything about her. I saw her transition into being a Senator, not knowing how unusual that was for a political spouse. I saw her speak passionately about issues around 9/11 as Senator for New York (The city I’d fallen in love with as a fan of so many classic Sitcoms, the city I dreamed of moving to.) And in 2008, the idea of there being a Woman in the White House was one I was wholeheartedly behind, and that woman being Hillary seemed ace. Of course, she lost and I was all in for Obama, who has served eight years as President with a grace, a dignity and a humility I think are exemplary.
He picked Hillary as his Secretary of State because he knew that only she could do the job he needed - mending America’s broken International relationships. He needed someone with international recognition, someone with experience of dealing with world leaders and, more importantly, someone well respected and well regarded BY those world leaders, in order to build partnerships and alliances.
In 2013, I read her book, Living History, and it really underscored her lifelong commitment to women’s and children’s rights. Her book Hard Choices came out in 2014 and I read that too. And I didn’t stop there, in the past two years I’ve read books about her both friendly and unfriendly, because I believed she would run again and, this time, had a good chance, and I wanted to be informed of opinion from all angles.
I’m a progressive. I’m a liberal. But I’d also say I’m cautious and pragmatic. I know there are conservative folks who don’t agree with me, and we get nowhere by fighting with each other and stubbornly holding out in a glorified stare contest waiting for the other side to blink. I believe in compromise and finding a middle ground. Incrementalism, it’s called, moving forwards slowly in order to make positive, progressive and (most importantly), LASTING change. I believe there is no greater proponent of that in today’s politics than Hillary Clinton. She has a proven, documented track record of reaching across party lines to try and work with colleagues to get things done. Those colleagues within and outside of her party all speak incredibly highly of Hillary the Public Servant, even while vilifying Hillary the Candidate.
She has flaws, of course, and they’re widely known. But after 30 years in public life, she was never going to be flawless. And I’d much rather have a battle-scarred, dogged, determined change agent walk into the Oval Office than someone who was all talk and had no history of action, even if they were on the left. That’s why I thought she was stronger than Bernie, whose ideas I was very keen on - he’d been on the sidelines. We need someone leading this world who’s been there and done it.
That shows you who this woman is. More than any speech, more than any campaign ad, more than any piece of legislation, more than any email…that’s who Hillary Clinton is. That’s the kind of leader America needs. That’s the kind of leader the WORLD needs. And that’s why I have no hesitation in shouting as loud and as often as I can: I’m With Her.