so is your dad

this was gonna be part of a much longer vent post I deleted bc it was tedious but I’m sharing this bc I’m still mad about it:

When I was about eleven or twelve I wanted to read the Harry Potter books because they were all the rage and, you know, I wanted to know what everyone was talking about. I discussed it with my mom, who still pre-read much of what I wanted to read to see if she was going to allow me to read it or not. I was nervous bc I knew she thought Harry Potter was a “bad influence” (this was back when the hot take was that it was somehow satanic, I don’t remember why except there were good witches in it).

My mom told me she thought I was succumbing to peer pressure rather than expressing a genuine desire, and therefore that I was being worldly and she’d thought she’d raised me to be a good Christian. And, she said, she wasn’t sure I was ready for this because she wasn’t sure I “knew the difference between reality and fantasy” and she was afraid I might start thinking I could do magic because I’d read the books.

It’s been twelve years or more and I’m STILL angry that she heard my desire to read a popular series of children’s books about a wizard and thought “hmm, but is my normal twelve year old who read Lord of the Rings at ten REALLY aware that they can’t do magic by waving a wand? I’d better tell them I don’t trust their perception of reality just in case”.

anonymous asked:

i LOVE your dad bod marvin so much and well basically everything you do???? because its??????? amazing?????? okay goodbye now have a nice day

I love him too. A lot. He’s the light of my life 

6

Yura to Beka: WELCOME TO THE MADNESS that is my unbelievably extra family.

[on IG]

hello my name is tony stark and today i’ll be using my anxiety to design a suit made to withstand every possible worst-case-scenario i can come up with

3

“Things have changed.”

  • Lance: (phone starts ringing)
  • Shiro: (looks at who is calling)
  • Shiro: (laughs) You still call your dad 'Daddy'?
  • Lance: (answers call and makes direct eye contact with Shiro)
  • Lance: Hey, Keith
  • Shiro: (chokes on drink)

jason: do u see me as a father figure, nico??
nico: i see you as a BOTHER figure ‘cause yOU’RE ALWAYS BOTHERING ME

this is honestly the dumbest thing i’ve ever doodled

5

You do what you gotta’.

i think about this lip sync a lot

when you abduct some girl and try and torture her for your uncles whereabouts but she manages to escape cos u ain’t shit

when some girl with zero force training takes *your* lightsaber so you have to kill her and her friend

when some girl humiliates your murderous ass so your even worse boss encourages you kill even more people

when you kill your dad and don’t feel great about it so you figure you better kill your mum and her friends too even tho it’ll be super hard for you

when you manipulate some girl into coming to meet u via lying about things that are important to her so u can take her to your shitty boss for some more torture and its super hard for you to watch

when you tell her shes worth nothing to anyone (but you duh this is so not abusive) just so you can have her under your control but she sees right through u and knocks u tf out

when u kill your own leader in front of her, proving ur totally untrustworthy and she doesn’t trust you???

when you fire 10,000 bullets at ur uncle so u don’t have 2 deal with him but he turns out to be cooler than u so u gotta but u end up looking like the lil piss bitch u r 

when people understate your shittyness and ship you with some girl you mentally, emotionally and physically abuse because u have nothing but contempt for her very existence

“When does a joke become a dad joke? When the punchline becomes… apparent

ok but what about: Shinsou trying to cheer up Izuku with the worst dad jokes

((Specially dedicated to the lovely @yumoirail-art – te dedico my lamest shindeku hasta ahora 8) ))