so i've just got to make one of these even though there are probably 100 of them out there

dad and i watch captain america: the winter soldier
  • dad: oh god it's starting shut up i've been waiting for this for months
  • (movie starts)
  • dad: THESE ARE THE BICEPS OF FREEDOM
  • dad: i don't know what's happening but the french guy fighting cap looks like french macklemore
  • me: how do you even know who macklemore is?
  • dad: i'm hip. i'm cool
  • me: don't you do it
  • dad: i'm gonna pop some tags, only got 20 baguettes in my pocket
  • (five minutes later)
  • dad: is that the Falcon? that's totally the Falcon
  • me: how do you know?
  • dad: i used to read the comic books trust me on this i'm an expert. his superpower was that he could talk to birds
  • me: birds?
  • dad: i mean in hindsight it probably wasn't the most useful thing ever
  • dad: if this winter soldier is supposedly a ghost in the machine that nobody's ever seen, and nobody will ever catch, you would think showing up in broad daylight and blowing up cars would not be his modus operandi
  • dad: how the heck did he laser through concrete??
  • me: idk dad it's nick fury he can probably do whatever he wants
  • dad: i'm sorry attractive nurse who just so happens to live next door, my heart belongs to a seventy year russian dude with a bionic arm
  • me: what
  • dad:
  • dad: nick fury isn't dead. justice never dies. he probably has a billion clones in some top secret storage facility, just waiting for their organ harvest.
  • me: ew dad gross no
  • dad: i really relate to that apple store employee
  • me: we all do dad
  • dad: oh that's that guy from the first movie! i remember him! he was my favorite, his eyes were so blue, and he loved steve so much. i wanted them to get together
  • me: dad good god
  • dad: he was a little less marilyn manson at that point though
  • dad: not that guyliner isn't a good look for this guy
  • dad: when a deadly russian assassin wears eyeliner, it's 'he's so dreamy' and 'wow what a badass'
  • dad: but when i do it it's 'you're too old' and 'bald guys can't pull off make-up'
  • me: dad it was halloween and it was one time you need to let this go
  • dad: so bucky barnes, aka cute cocky guy who died in the first movie, aka steve roger's best friend/boyfriend, is a top secret super scary brainwashed hydra agent?
  • me: mmm-hm
  • dad: called it
  • dad: do you think single handedly destroying jets is just a common, everyday thing for cap? punch a few tanks, feed a few pigeons, take out a plane, help old ladies cross the street...
  • dad: captain america is like your grandad minus the booze and the cussing
  • dad: in all honesty that was a little anti-climactic
  • dad: i was 100% sure nick fury was gonna descend majestically from the heavens, 'All I do is Win' blaring in the background, and single-handedly save everyone's ass
  • dad: scarjo and chris evans are two of the most beautiful people in the world and they are both in this movie and i don't know how to feel about it i have butterflies in my stomach i'm a schoolboy again
  • me: you know on second thought we should have brought mom
  • dad: where's hawkeye? where's bruce? where's tony? where's thor? WHERE ARE ALL THE OTHER AVENGERS AS THE ENTIRETY OF SHIELD IS COMPROMISED AND NICK FURY DIES
  • me: maybe they figured steve could handle it
  • dad: maybe they're all lazy assholes

anonymous asked:

Hey, you're German, right? I've got a huge favour to ask of you. I've been studying German for a few years, and I plan on studying there for a year. Before that, I wanna improve my language skills, so I've been wondering if you could tell me about some good original German movies? I don't want to watch dubbed ones, I've heard they're horrible. Thank you so much! Love your blog, by the way.

Dubbed movies aren’t actually half bad - at least to movies dubbed in other languages. Trust me, I’ve watched both Spanish and French dubbed movies, they were way worse. This is what we like to call “Jammern auf hohem Niveau” - complaining even though everything is pretty good. You’ll find that Germans are a people of complainers; we like to complain about everything. We are never content :) 

Still, I’m really really excited that you’re interested in my culture and HELL YES THERE ARE A BUNCH OF AWESOME GERMAN MOVIES. Here are some highly acclaimed ones and some of my favourites, I hope all links work. 

  • 12 Meter ohne Kopf (a movie about a German pirate, who allegedly walked 12 meters after being beheaded in order to save his crew)
  • Auf der anderen Seite (a really bautiful sort of episodic movie connecting the lives of three families, both German and Turkish)
  • Barfuss (a movie about a girl suffering from PTSD, who is saved mostly accidentally from committing suicide by a dude cleaning the clinic she is in, and then follows him around everywhere, and they fall in love. Seriously, onely one of two movies by Til Schweiger worth watching)
  • Buddenbrooks (the story of a very rich merchant family and their downfall…a really famour book adaptation)
  • Das Boot (a movie about a German submarine and its crew during World War II. 100& must-see)
  • Das Experiment (A movie about a psychology experiment in prison, and how people react when given free reign over others. This should come with a huge trigger warning. It’s awesome, but also really super disturbing)
  • Das Leben der Anderen (You might’ve heard of that one, since it received an Oscar. It deals with surveillance in East Germany, and is, also, a must-see).
  • Das weiße Band (A movie about the oppressive and rigid society pre-World War I children grew up in.)
  • Das Wunder von Bern (This movie mixes the football world championships of 1954 (soccer for heathens who call other stuff football) and the story of a family that has to re-learn to live with each other when the father comes home after being a war captive for like…12 years MUST SEE)
  • Der Baader Meinhof Komplex (movie about famous German left extremists, the RAF and their terrorist attacks)
  • Der Schuh des Manitu (THE single best German comedy to ever exist. It makes fun of Cowboy movies/books that are super popular in Germany. You’ll cry of laughter seeing Native Americans with a Bavarian accent - which also means your language level should be really high, or you won’t understand a thing. Uh, obviously don’t watch if you think white comedians playing Native Americans is racist even when it’s satire)
  • Der Untergang (the last days in thr life of Adolf Hitler. You’ll probably have heard of that one, too. MUST SEE)
  • Die Blechtrommel (God, I don’t know how to describe this one. Basically, a movie about a child who decides he doesn’t want to grow anymore and observes the world of the adults around him?)
  • Die Fälscher (again, dealing with World War II, and people in concentration camps who were tasked with copying money of other countries)
  • Die fetten Jahre sind vorbei (a movie about three rebels who break into rich people’s houses only to rearrange their furniture and tell them to revise their morals - until one of them catches them in the act and they abduct him for a weekend. MUST SEE)
  • Die Feuerzangenbowle (THE classic movie. about the German school system. An older guy pretending to be a student at an elite high school. Also gave the name to a drink you will find a lot on Christmas markets)
  • Effie Briest (another novel adaptation about a young woman whose marriage is arranged and who loses everything when she cheats on her husband)
  • Ein Freund von mir (two guys who are completely different building a very strange friendship)
  • Elementarteilchen (about the lives of two brothers who were separated after birth, and the completely different lives they lead)
  • Fack Ju Göhte (no links yet, it only came out last year, a new comedy about the German school system, and absolute must-see, if you happen to find a link one day)
  • Gegen die Wand (a Turkish girl fake-marrying a German addict in an attempt to escae her family. MUST SEE)
  • Goodbye Lenin (a beautiful movie/comedy about a family and the German reunification. MUST SEE)
  • Im Winter ein Jahr (a family dealing with the loss of their son/brother)
  • Kabale und Liebe (a superb adaptation of Schiller’s play. bsjdhkdjk)
  • Kebab Connection (…I don’t even know how to describe this movie. Just watch it. Very multi/transcultural and hilarious)
  • Keinohrhasen (a douche has to do community service at a kindergarten - and finds that the girl he used to bully as a kid is now his superior. uh-oh. It’s super funny)
  • Kirschblüten - Hanami  (a dude travelling to Japan to understand and be close to his late wife) 
  • Lola rennt ( a movie about a couple in a dangerous situation - and three possible outcomes)
  • Schiller (ah boy, this was a TV production, so I couldn’t find a link. A brilliant movie about the life of Germany’s best playwright, if you ask me)
  • Soul Kitchen (a comedy about a guy trying to keep his restaurant afloat and keeping his brother out of a life of petty crime)
  • Sophie Scholl - die letzten Tage (a movie about the last days in the life of Sophie Scholl and her brother, who were part of the resistance against the Nazis)
  • Vincent will Meer (a guy with tourette syndrom, a girl with an eating disorder and a guy with OCD break out of their psychiatric clinic to go to the sea. MUST SEE)
  • Was nützt die Liebe in Gedanken? ( a movie based on a real story, about a group of teenagers vowing to commit suicide once they do not feel any love anymore)
  • Wer früher stirbt ist länger tot (a comedy about a kid who does a lot of nonsense and when told that he is the reason his mother dies, blames himself, feares that he has to go to hell, and tries to make up for his sins by finding his dad a new wife. Hilarious. Again, tho, super strong Bavarian accent, beware!)

And if you want to watch a few good German TV-shows:

  • Türkisch für Anfänger (ABSOLUTE MUST SEE TV SERIES OMG WATCH IT!!! It deals with a German-Turkish patchwork family and it is hilarious)
  • Tatort Münster (basically a procedural crime show. There are a lot of Tatorts, but this is the only one that is always good. you’ll find a lot of the episodes on youtube)
  • Der letzte Zeuge (a show about a coroner solving crimes)

anonymous asked:

Question: Can my writings identify me? I'm not ashamed of the things I've written for fandom at all, but I have hopes of becoming a published author at some point and former fanfic writers are the laughing stock of the “real” literary community. It worries me that, if I become a published author, someone will recognize my fics and out me as a former fic author. Should I delete all trace of my fics before I publish my original stories?

It’s okay, friend! These are legitimate fears that I think a lot of writers experience, but really, I don’t think this is anything worth worrying about. I’ll address your concerns individually:

Should I delete all trace of my fics before I publish my original stories?

Definitely not!!

Unless you have a situation where your work was originally fanfiction, but you modified it to be 100% original. (Like how 50 Shades of Gray removed all traces of its Twilight influence, and no doubt removed the original from the internet)

I mean, it’s up to you in the end. But see, here’s the thing. Being a successful writer is HARD. Getting published at all is challenging enough, let alone selling enough books to be considered “successful.” Most authors struggle to even sell 100 books. I don’t mean to be depressing about it, but having a realistic outlook will help you succeed in the long run.

A lot of times, in my opinion, success boils down to marketing. People can’t enjoy your book if they don’t know it exists.

Anyone have a copy of Cinder on their shelf by Marissa Meyer? One of the last page lists hundreds of book bloggers that she reached out to in order to get some hype going about her book. And it worked. It got the word out, and I honestly believe that was a big factor in making the Lunar Chronicles as successful as it is. Of course, her books had to be amazing enough to build on that hype and keep growing. But people have to know your book exists before they can read it and fall in love with it.

If you already have an online following that enjoys your writing, you get a head start. You have a place to go to say “Hey everyone, look. I got published!”

I heard recently that Sarah J Maas started off posting her work online, and gained fans that way—before her books were even published. When you already have people excited about your work and your writing, you have a group of people “warmed up” and more willing to buy. They know you. They’re familiar with you.

(I hate to make this all about the numbers, but again, it’s about being realistic. The publishers only care about the numbers, so if you want to get a book #2 out there, your book #1 sales have to be decent.)

Truthfully, very few of your fanfic followers will actually buy a book, though. Most people are just there for the free content. But it’s a start. It’s a way to get the word out and grab a few precious sales.

I’ve also heard from agents at writing conferences that having an online following when you query can improve your chances. Mostly they were talking about self-published authors, but it applies to fanfic authors too. You’ve proven that you can get people to read your work and become your fan. That’s credibility.

It worries me that, if I become a published author, someone will recognize my fics and out me as a former fic author.

Yeah, it might happen. I don’t think it’s anything to worry about, though.

  1. Most fanfic authors post under a username, so unless you make it public knowledge that it’s you, you can stay anonymous. Even if your friends/family know about the connection, it’d be hard to get enough word-of-mouth going to make that public knowledge.
  2. Most people don’t pay much attention to the author of the book they read.
  3. Honestly, not many people will have the time/interest be snooping around your background.
  4. The people who DO go snooping around most likely loved your writing so much that they wanted to learn more about you and see if you had any other books published. In which case they’d probably be like “Oh cool, she used to be a fanfic author” and either not think much of it, or see it as really neat.
    1. People who loved your book but think poorly of fanfiction will be in for a surprise. You can help change the bad stereotypes floating around about fanfiction as “lesser” writing, one mind at a time!
    2. This might be really inspiring to other fic writers who find this out. And you will become their hero! “Wow, this writer did it. I can too!!”
    3. Long-time fans of your fanfiction may just become your most loyal fans. They can have that connected feeling to you because they knew you before everyone else. “Wow, I used to read this person’s writing all the time! It’s crazy how much their writing has grown over the years.”

Fanfic writers are the laughing stock of the “real” literary community.

My friend, unless you are writing gritty realistic fiction about a 50-year-old white man having a mid-life crisis, you will always be the laughingstock of the “real” literary community.

The “real” literary community will always cling to their ideas of writing purity, and there isn’t much you can do about it. You have to be a Hemmingway or a Fitzgerald in order to be of “real” value. Purists like we’re talking about are few and mostly in academia, and they will wave their fists at you and whine and cry that literature is being ruined, absolutely ruined by all these monstrosities like genre fiction and fanfiction.

(I’m somewhat bitter about this, by the way. My university completely snubbed its nose at any hint of genre fiction, but luckily I had several professors who were more open-minded about such things.)

But it’s like, ehh. Let them shake their fists. Fanfiction is a beautiful form of writing and millions of people will agree with me on that. Sure, a lot of people will also disagree, but you can’t please everyone.

–E

anonymous asked:

So i've just recently started reading sterek fic. And i've completely fallen down that rabbit hole. So i was wondering if you could recommend some good fics as you seem to have been reading some recently? It would be amazingly helpful if you could. Thanks! - Sam

you’re damn right i can rec you some sterek! 😊 i tried to pick some that weren’t just on the first page when you rank by kudos. here we go: 

sterek fic rec

Play It Again (ABSOLUTE FAVE. stiles’ characterization is PERFECT)
In which Stiles goes along with one of Derek’s plans and ends up in an alternate universe as a result. He should’ve known better. He did know better, actually, and that means he has no one to blame but himself.

Laura wants to lure the kid in with food and kindness and make a pet of him, like a feral cat. Derek wants to have him arrested for stalking. They’re at an impasse. (And the rest of the family is staying emphatically out of it in a way that suggests bets have been placed.)

Say Something (my favorite The Sheriff Finds Out scene ever)
That first time Stiles decided it was probably wise to let sleeping werewolves lie.

The Socioeconomic Repercussions of Mutually Assured Destruction
The trouble with having the kind of brain that likes to write essays on male circumcision for an Economics class, is that it also likes to turn PowerPoint presentations for Biology into odes on the perfection of notorious bad boy Derek Hale’s backside.

Fly a Little Faster
Everyone knows when you go back in time, you shouldn’t step on an ant, just in case you accidentally kill your own grandparent or something. But what happens when you go back in time and, uh, accidentally interrupt the one event that apparently made the Grumpiest Alpha in Town into a ball of mindless manpain?

Well, if Marty McFly can do it, so can Stiles Stilinski. All he has to do is get Derek and Paige to fall in love before he gets pulled back to his own time. And before he makes anything worse. That’s easy as pie, right? Right?

Hell Is Other People series 
Stiles discovers the hazards of growing up a real boy when, at heart, he’s not a real boy at all.

Safety in Silence
It’s perfectly understandable. Even Derek wouldn’t want to be Derek’s soulmate.

Crash Landers 
In which Stiles learns to Stalk That Stalk. (Or, how to accidentally woo your unfriendly neighborhood alpha in roughly five hundred handwritten steps.)

this boy, half-destroyed (don’t let the second person POV throw you off, it’s BEAUTIFUL)
Bodies – those are something you understand, mostly; you know immediately exactly how much smaller he is than the last time you saw him. Too skinny, too pale; his cheeks cave in a little too much, from his face. He’s a shadow of something: he looks like the dead walking. His hands are stuffed down in the pockets of his hoodie and he looks tentative but not afraid.

Derek Hale used to have a family. Now, he’s got a teenage human more trouble than he’s worth. Post-S2.

the blood blooms clean in you, ruby (same author, same concept, seriously, READ THEM BOTH)
You don’t remember, anymore, where exactly you were when you found out that she was dead. You remember almost everything else about her dying, though.

Stiles Stilinski has always been the person who will do what other people don’t want to. It’s hard, though, when your friends keep trying to protect you. Post-S2.

will to follow through (like, if i wrote teen wolf, this fic would’ve been season four. just absolutely 100% perfect, and i love danny mahealani) 
“It depends entirely on how you look at it, I guess,” Stiles shrugs. “On the one hand, instant healing and the apparently inherited ability to pull off leather at all times. On the other, serious attitude problems and a suspicious disappearance of eyebrows.”

“Even Derek’s?” Danny snorts, “that’s a lot of eyebrow to lose.”

“I know,” Stiles agrees. “You should see, it’s so weird. Every time I want to ask him where they go, except he’d totally eat my face off.”

“There are worse ways to die.”

cool story, bro
FUUUUUUCK, is it a sweet valley high situation where Stiles is very aware that his twin is way more attractive and confident than he is, EVEN THOUGH THEY’RE IDENTICAL, and he always ends up with the hotter significant others and more friends and Stiles guesses that’s why he’s attracted to the pack at first, because it’s something that’s just his, not his twin’s too. But of course, Stiles’s twin gets bit and now he’s part of Derek’s pack, and Derek doesn’t snap at him like he snaps at Stiles, never slams him into things, fucking FIGURES, STILES’S TWIN GETS EVERYTHIIIIIIIING.

Hold The Door (Supernatural crossover but like… trust me)
When Derek is killed by a rival alpha, the pack will stop at nothing to get him back. Even if that means blackmailing the most dangerous hunter duo this side of hell. Whatever. That whole devil thing was probably totally exaggerated, anyway.

Apathy, Apathy, You’ll Be The Death of Me
Everyone’s apathetic. Except Derek. Derek cares so much.

or Boyd is a pragmatic posthumous reappropriater, Erica spends her free time impersonating Meursault and playing Fruit Ninja, Isaac would like everyone to settle down already, Stiles is bi, Scott’s actually holding it together pretty well for a week-old Alpha with a two pack problem, Jackson’s a lizard, Lydia accessorizes, Allison’s playing on a rival (semi-murderous) team and Derek just keeps showing up.

→ que tu m’aimais encore (read the fake boyfriend convention au by the same author after this one to cheer you up)
Wolves mate for life, don’t they?

But I’m Not a Soldier
The first time Derek shoves Stiles against a wall, she pepper sprays him in his face.

But The World Won’t Stop Turning (y’all know i can’t resist a time traveller’s wife au)
Derek glances at Stiles, who is watching him with a curious expression.

“Oh shit,” Stiles exclaims as comprehension dawns on him. “Everything makes sense now. Derek, I know what the witch did, she cursed you with – “

But before Stiles is able to finish his sentence, everything fades away and Derek is surrounded by darkness.

anonymous asked:

I've noticed you talking a lot about cockles and, while I totally ship it, I feel like we leave their wives and children out of the convo. what're your thoughts were on that? Do you think their wives know and don't care? Are their marriages fake?

Hahaha– oh Nonny.

I am assuming you’re new to my blog, because if you weren’t, you’d know … where many people do leave the wives out of the conversation– I do not.

If I’m known for anything on this crazy, little website, it’s for being a Cockles shipper who is 100%, totally, no argument, no question– with the wives completely.

I even wrote a 78k word fic based on that premise

But– even with all that, I will break it down for you now. Get comfortable, this’ll be long.

Let me start by saying: no, their marriages aren’t fake.

Considering Misha met his future wife during their English class in high school, many many years before he would even know that Jensen Ackles existed, his marriage is nothing but real through and through.

And Jensen met Danneel, and was friends with her long before he met Misha. They were dating when Misha joined the show– and although I think Jensen and Misha didn’t take very long to hit it off, they certainly weren’t like:

“Hi, I’m Jensen.”

“Hello, I’m Misha.”

“So … you want to get naked and fuck?”

“Well, we do have a twenty minute break, so sure.”

It probably took them a while to get to know one another, start feeling that attraction, work through their thoughts and emotions, figure out if those feelings were being reciprocated– and so on, and so on. It wasn’t instant. Hell, It probably wasn’t even quick.

But, that spark most likely was something that the two did notice not long after they met.

Now, for Misha– someone who has felt feelings outside of his marriage before, probably wasn’t too affected when he started to feel them for Jensen . Misha and Vicki have been very, very open about the girlfriend that they shared several years back. She was Vicki’s best friend– and when Vicki realized that she was falling for her, she told her husband, and Misha said that he was falling for the woman too. They soon found themselves in a serious, polyamorous relationship. They traveled together, exchanged rings– they were involved in every way, and if that woman’s family didn’t give her such a hard time about her “non-traditional” relationship, those three might still be together. Who knows. The point is, Misha is no stranger to these kinds of things, so if he approached his wife and told her: “I think I’m falling for Jensen.” She would probably support him 100%.

As for Jensen and Danneel– it may not have gone over that easily, but I don’t think it was a very difficult transition for them either … and there’s various reasons I think that.

I don’t really have any evidence other than my own sneaking suspicion, but I think that Jensen has had experience with men before Misha. His personality is just– so unique. He grew up in Texas just like Jared, but the two act so differently when it comes to certain things. Although Jared is far more open minded now, you can see every now and then, his old, conservative side peeking out (that’s not to say he’s racist or bigoted, so don’t get angry. I’m just saying, Texas is a whole other world and to be raised down there … it makes you a different person. I’m from Oklahoma, so I know how it is) but Jensen just doesn’t seem to have that coded conformity. He seems much more open and laid back when it comes to liberal things (and yes, I know– he hasn’t always been open to the Destiel topic, but I honestly think he is/was against it because he sees it flowing against the plot of the show. He’s very much about what’s good for the Supernatural and Dean Winchester specifically, I don’t believe he’s against the idea of Destiel though … but I digress). So, I do think that at some point, he has been with a man before, because he is perfectly comfortable touching, being affectionate, being close, and fawning over men– in ways that completely straight guys tend to avoid. Jared touches, but it’s always in a joking, goofy way. Jensen lingers– he touches subconsciously. There’s a big difference there.

So– when Misha came along with those bright, blue eyes and sharp jaw that could cut a Thanksgiving turkey, Jensen probably wasn’t too shaken by his attraction. Now, did he share those thoughts and feelings with Danneel right away? Maybe … maybe not. They hadn’t known each other as long as Misha and Vicki had, so Jensen might not have been sure how Danneel would react to her boyfriend finding another man hot. But the more he got to know her, the closer they became, the more he realized, she wouldn’t mind. Danneel has said before in interviews, that she understands and feels that people can share romantic and intimate relationships with their close friends and not have it be a big deal. She is also a very sexual, expressive, and adventurous person, so if her boyfriend/ soon-to-be husband told her about these feelings towards his friend, I’m sure she would be supportive. Hell, she might have even been rooting for it to happen. I can’t be sure, but I sincerely doubt that the woman would be heartbroken or feel betrayed. It just doesn’t fit with her personality.

Fast forward to today– with the head boops and the long, deep conversations while driving from set to set, and the personal phone calls to ask for the other’s advice, and the slips of the tongue, and the almost-kisses, and the lingering touches, and the heart-eyes, and the unicorn laughs … they are just too happy together and in general to be struggling with tense marriages on the side.
Danneel is pregnant– so obviously her and Jensen are still intimate (and my god, why wouldn’t they be? They are both too beautiful …) And Misha said that Vicki thought that she might be pregnant again, so– same thing. They are also obviously still intimate. So, with the boys and their wives all still very much in love, still physically involved with one another, and still bringing new life into this world– and with Jensen and Misha still acting just as obsessed with one another as always, I have to think that they are all very aware of everyone’s feelings and everyone’s attractions– and they are all cool with it.

Actors or not– people are still people and it’s hard to hide personal things if they are unpleasant. People’s demeanor changes when they’re having troubles at home. Friendships fail, work suffers, smiles diminish– none of that is happening with Jensen and Misha.

They are in good spirits, both together and apart.

But especially together.

Their wives can see that, and they probably love seeing their husbands so happy.

If anything– Jensen and Misha’s relationship brought them all closer … and nothing warms the cockles of my heart more than that.

<3

yes but there’s also 

  • ‘I’m hella sick but not old enough to purchase cough medicine and that sounds really pitiful coming from a college student but would you please go buy me some NyQuil???’ au
  • 'We made a bet at the beginning of the laser tag game to see who was better and guess who won. It’s time to pay up.’ au
  • 'Who keeps using my wifi?’ 'Literally everyone, your password is hella easy to guess.’ au
  • Tried to unlock the wrong car in the parking garage au
  • 'I’m on the FBI’s most-wanted list for killing a fuck ton of people, but calm down I just wanna date you bc your face is v smoochable and you give me butterflies.’ au
  • See also; 'Dating a most-wanted serial killer and never getting a heads-up before they come home covered in blood so you’ve gotta be ready to draw the curtains and hide a body every time you hear a car pull into the driveway’ au
  • 'We really should not have played Monopoly’ au
  • Life-sized version of Clue in the old manor on the hill au
  • 'I originally followed you on Instagram bc you’re hot and I’m thirsty but now I’ve developed actual feelings for you bc you’re a genuinely good person’ au
  • 'Fuck me you’re cute why did we have to meet on the one day I decided to stay in my sweats??’ au
  • 'I went to the bar last night bc I just got dumped and wanted to drink away my pain but then one thing lead to another and somehow I broke into your house thinking it was mine and now I can’t find my left shoe but are those waffles I smell?’ au
  • 'I saw that you were reading Eleanor and Park have you gotten to the part where she leaves him and if so can we talk about it because not a lot of people have read this book and I need a shoulder to cry on.’ au
  • 'You passed out in Disneyland and I’ve been taking care of you for the past two hours oh my god are you okay??’ 'Yes I’m okay but who the hell are you supposed to be?’ 'I’m the face character for Peter Pan but that’s not important’ au
  • 'I don’t really know you but I noticed that this creep has been trying to chat you up even though you’ve already turned him down, so I’ll pretend to be your boyfriend/girlfriend  until they leave you alone.’ au
  • Bonnie and Clyde au???
  • Attend same-sex privet schools that are right across the street from each other au
  • Masquerade au
  • 'I don’t like you and you don’t like me but our best friends just died in a car crash and left their one-year-old daughter in our custody so now we’ve got to act civil and end up falling for each other’ au
  • [Basically a Life As We Know It au]
  • 'Found your number inside of a library book that looks like it hasn’t been checked out in ages and decided to text you to see if it worked au
  • 'The biggest rule of immortality is to not get involved with mortals but whoops I was in a coffee shop one day and fell in love with you and now I’m freaking out bc in the grand scope of things we don’t get a lot of time together but fuck no please don’t leave me not yet no.’ au
  • 'I just moved into the apartment next door and I am 100% sure that it’s haunted bc this building used to be a hospital and anyway I heard I noise coming from inside the walls can I please just crash here for the night?’ au
  • 'I know that you’re really into school and probably don’t want to risk your spot on the college football team, but would you mind if I smoked in our dorm room??’ au
  • Followed by 'Nah, I don’t care, as long as I can shotgun some smoke from that pretty little mouth of yours.’ au wow that got sexual and I am not sorry.
  • Went to the beach for the first time au
  • Ancient Rome au
  • Rival team captains who know nothing about personal space and constantly get into fights where they end up face-to-face every single game until one day one of the coaches yells at them to either kiss or get back to the game au
  • 'Hey, so I might have just robbed a bank right now and I kind of need a getaway car, would you pleeeeeaaase help me I can pay you back in sexual favors but also cash.’ au
  • 'I know that you don’t know me, but you were on the receiving end of my girlfriend/boyfriend’s heart donation and being around you kind of makes it feel like they’re still here I’m sorry if that’s kind of weird.’ au
  • 'Shit I wasn’t watching where I was walking and ended up spilling my Rockstar all over your white sweater I’m so sorry here have my jacket.’ au
  • Caught yelling at Go, Diego, Go in the hospital waiting room and after an awkwardly long period of silence the other person joins in bc they’ve got nothing better to do with their waiting time au
  • 'The person living in the apartment across the wall to mine is a nymphomaniac and yeah okay they’re p hot but it’s v hard to write an essay on feminism when all I can hear is sexual screaming.’ au
  • It’s three am, I just wanted some clam chowder, and some how I ended up on Hollywood Bl. can you please tell me where a good restaurant is I think I’m going to cry.’ au
  • 'Fuck my ex just walked into the restaurant with their new girlfriend/boyfriend could you pretend we’re dating so they don’t think I’m hung up on them I swear I’ll pay you later.’ au
  • 'I work at the daycare that you drop your daughter off at every week and she got me sick.’ au
  • 'So I know we just met but it’s raining and my tent has a hole in it, could I sleep in your camper with you?’ au
  • 'Okay okay okay I know we’re just friends and I don’t want anything to change that but I may have told my mom that we’re dating so she would stop trying to set me up with people would you be up to going to my sister’s wedding as my plus one so my mom won’t know I lied?’ au
  • 'Hit me, we’re on college campus and you’ll have to pay for my tuition’ au
  • 'Your headphones aren’t plugged in all the way so that hardcore porn fic you’ve been listening to for the past ten minutes has been broadcasting through the bus on full volume.’ au
  • The Breakfast Club au
  • Wimbledon [the movie] au
  • West Side Story au
  • 'Constantly getting confused as the girlfriend/boyfriend of the lead singer for a heavy metal band bc I’m always going to concerts and getting backstage passes but I’ve never even met the lead singer until the day he/she got drunk and we hooked up in his/her tour bus [whoops now we’re actually dating shh]’ au
  • 'It’s two am, we’re standing outside of our apartment building bc someone pulled the fire alarm, and you look cold and unprepared, do you want to share my blanket?’ au
  • Heartache On The Big Screen au
  • Breakfast At Tiffany's au omg pls
  • 'The zombie apocalypse started two years ago I can’t believe I still have to work at this fucking book store.’ au
  • Long Way Home au
  • We like each other but our dogs don’t so I’m going to have to ask you to stop taking this walking route you attractive fucker’ au
  • 'Sometimes, your soulmate and the love of your life don’t end up being the same person. And that’s something I had to learn the hard way.’ Au

anonymous asked:

Woo boy, this is something I've been wondering about Papyrus for a long time now. Okay, so we all get that Papyrus is this confident and headstrong skeleton who thinks he's a hotshot, but every now and then in the game, we catch hints that Papyrus has secret insecurities and self-doubts. On top of that, we also get the feeling he's lonely. And lastly, it's almost like wants to join the royal guard to prove to everyone that he's so much more than a cloud cuckoo-lander. Your thoughts on this?

Well, I think you nailed it. Probably the best supporting dialogue for that point is one of the phone calls where Papyrus says something like “Ugh! Grillby’s! It’s too greasy and gross!”, Undyne says “Yeah! Grillby’s! I love that kind of food!”, and Papyrus says “Uh… I mean, Grillby’s is great!”

Later on there’s another exchange like it, about anime. Pap: “Isn’t anime for little kids?” Undyne: “NO WAY IT’S GREAT.” Pap: “…wait, do YOU like anime? UHHH MAYBE I LIKE IT TOO.;;”

He picks up a different opinion just to agree with Undyne, and that’s a big clue that he just wants to fit in with others and be liked. He admires Mettaton unconditionally for being handsome and popular, not necessarily for his good character (and we know from experience that he’s kind of an ass :V).

So I think while he’s confident and talks a big game, like, it’s not the same way Undyne does. Undyne is 100% unapologetic about the person she is, and the bits we get about her childhood make me inclined to think she’d be that way whether she was a good person or not, whether anyone agreed with her or not. Part of me wonders if Papyrus actually picked up some of his boastful tendencies from being around HER.

It’s… actually kind of lucky Undyne has as good a heart as she does, because she could be a REALLY bad influence over Pap, I think. She’s really careful to encourage him to think for himself and feel okay with his own opinions, even if they’re not the same as hers. It’s implied that they’re relatively newer friends, so I think the longer Pap is around her, the more he’ll learn to be okay with himself and figure himself out. He’s just not totally there yet.

Papyrus probably makes Undyne behave a little more responsibly than she has in the past too, haha. They’re so good for each other. Aw man, I just, *runs hands down face* they’re perfect friends and I love them.

I think a lot of Papyrus’ gentler nature probably comes from his insecurities though. Like, he knows what it feels like to be lonely and to want to be LIKED, so he can picture other people feeling the same way. He thinks just having one friend would solve anyone’s problems, since that would just about solve all of his.

Undyne doesn’t give a crap about being liked, so doesn’t give a crap if other people want to be liked. It’s a more genuine confidence, but ends with spears to the face instead of hugs, and with less human friends.

I don’t know if I agree fully with the last part though, about him wanting to prove himself to be more than the “loser” people think he is. I’m not sure his motivations are about proving himself to anyone. The royal guard position is just something he sees other people praise, like Mettaton’s popularity, so he mimics it. He thinks that once he gets the title, everyone’s opinions of him will just change instantly and they’ll talk about him like they talk about Undyne.

I think he’s just aching to have someone say that he’s done the correct thing and will totally mold himself into someone he’s not in order to get that validation. If he were proving himself, I think that would mean he’d have already accepted himself, but is trying to make others see it.

So it’s a small blessing that he’s got Undyne telling him he’s doing the right thing by being exactly who he is.

Harry Potter and the Cursed Child: Sunday 8th January, 2017.

This was my first show since September so to say I was excited was a bit of an understatement. Not even a tube strike was going to bring me down! Anyway, as you’d expect from someone with my username, this is 90% Albus and/or Scorpius. I tried not to describe everything in minute detail because it’s been done a hundred times already (my previous recaps are here), yet this still managed to be 9k+ words long! Fear not, I’ve written this scene by scene so you can skip to the bits you are interested in. Or just because I’m a self aware rambler, you can skip riiiight to the end for the TL;DR bit I did at the end! 

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Playing the Melody

100 Theme Drabble Challenge featuring HopeLight

previous themes

playing the melody; au
(warning: this one is really, really long)

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tardisandcinnamon  asked:

I'm not the last anon but I'm in pretty much the exact same situation, I've wanted to get into them for a while, mostly because I see some blogs I follow talk about how gay they are. I've already watched both their MVs (cause there's only 2, right?) and listened to just the songs on Spotify, and they're really good. And I saw in the tags you offered to talk about each girl to make getting to know them easier, and I would absolutely love if you could do that, pretty please?

i was going to try to be super cool about this, but i’m so excited right now. alright, here goes.. (btw, all the names have links to their little “interview quizzes” [just not yeonjung because she’s new])

Seola is the dad of the group. Why is she the dad? Because she’s all sleep and no bs. She and Exy probably go out for drinks after the kids go the sleep. She’s super thirsty for drama and died for all of us when she tripped over a huge block of concrete. And despite being the oldest, all the girls look after her very well :) and she can shake that booty 6/10 on the gay scale so far.

Xuan Yi is the #1 mother of this group and the first member of the Chinity. She pays for everyone and only expects cheek kisses/flattering in return. Important fact: she loves dried seaweed. She loves seaweed because she is legally registered as a fish. She’d betray every member in the hunger games if dried seaweed was the reward. She’s in an open, love-disgust marriage with Bona, but she flirts with everyone like she doesn’t even know her. She’s also the biggest dork on the planet, especially when she dances. 9/10 on the gay scale.

Bona is the mother hen. In other words, all the protection and care, but can’t manage the kids for shit. She’s a total flirt and could probably get anything she wants with her aegyo. She’s well known for being disgusted with many things (including Xuan Yi) and it’s a total meme. She tries to hide the pain of her wife Xuan Yi flirting with everyone by flirting with Cheng Xiao and trying to get at Eunseo, but Luda won’t have that bs. is probably into some weird kinky shit 9/10 on the gay scale.

Exy is the leader but the relatable procrastinator of the group and is a lamewad. She is the overworked aunt who always gets left to take care of all the kids. Despite coming off as a badass on Unpretty Rapstar, she’s just a giant cutie. This girl can sing too just forget rapping for a bit and watch this. even tho she’s tired from Dayoung’s energy, i’m pretty sure she entices it half the time she and Seola are just too tired to put 100% into being gay. 7/10 on the gay scale.

Soobin is the sweetest ball of sunshine. She’s easy going to the point of changing behind a door while on camera and being hit but does nothing about it. No matter how laidback, she’s bad under pressure. While she’s a bit quiet most of the time, when she’s loud, SHE IS LOUD. There is an actual pterodactyl living inside of her. Don’t believe me? Watch the Weekly Idol episode, then you will know the truth… I know she has a gay little heart, but we don’t see it much cause she tries to hide it, but we caught her a few times. 6/10 on the gay scale (but only because she hasn’t got enough screen time to know).

Luda is the head honcho, the ring leader, the boss, the captain of the Cosmic Gays™ that goes by the pseudonym “Lurrito.” This girl is the gayest, most devious little fluff ball. Something mischievous happened? Luda called the hit. Super quiet and cute on the outside, Satan on the inside. This girl’s got everyone so whipped, they don’t even deny it. She’s the girl with the most girlfriends. And don’t mess with Eunseo, cause Luda will mess you up. That’s her #1 girl. 17/10 on the gay scale.

Dawon is one of the most underrated members. While there isn’t much to know about her because her screen time is so little, all you need to know is that this little, considerate angel has a beautiful soul and cAN SING. Also, important fact: her nickname is Snorlax. She also talks like an old person and seems very mature for her age, also meaning she can control her gay impulses. 5/10 on the gay scale (but only because she hasn’t got enough screen time to know).

Eunseo (aka meme) is the first lady of the Cosmic Gays™ and the mischievous line. If she does something devious, Luda probably told her to do it. She uses loud shouting (“BBANG!!!!!”) to communicate and runs a bird farm. She’s extremely extra and is for sure the loudest member. But even though she drives Exy nuts, she’s incredibly caring and watches over all the members (comforted Seola when she was forced to face her fear of water). She has the second most girlfriends. 15/10 on the gay scale.

Cheng Xiao is the cutest little puppy and the second member of the Chinity. She looks like a doll and styles her hair in buns so she looks like Chun Li from Street Fighter. All of the members love her half to death and she’s probably being cuddled by someone nearly all day (most likely by Eunseo or Bona). Her thighs are one of God’s holy creations. She can flip. She’s super flexible. She does flips. She has thighs of life. She can flip. Did I mention she’s super adorable? And that she can flip? She probably struggles with Korean the most out of the Chinity, and it’s probably the cutest thing when she makes little mistakes. 8/10 on the gay scale.

Mei Qi is the sexy, UNDERAGE member and the third/final member of the Chinity (is the best at Korean among the three). She’s considered another mom of the group, but insists she’s an oppa (btw we’re all pretty sure she’s the only one who calls her that). This girl is another of the most underrated members, both by the fandom and Starship itself. She’s supposed to be a part of the vocal line, but somehow ended up only being a main dancer (not that being a main dancer isn’t a huge accomplishment). She’s said very little on air and doesn’t get much screen time, but the most important thing she’s said so far is “PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA!” She’s like Cheng Xiao and seems to be more gay loved than gay loving, but accepting gay love is still being gay. 7/10 on the gay scale. (ps. “I love Mei Qi. I love Mei Qiiii.” - Lee Luda)

Yeoreum is a small, precious little warm fuzzie that kind of looks like she could be Taeyeon’s child. She lives in a small nest and is the cutest little thing ever and I’m just going asdhghf trying to think of things to say. She joins the major aegyo line with Bona and uses it against Xuan Yi for food. She seems to be in a competition for Eunseo’s love with Cheng Xiao, but I don’t think either she or Cheng Xiao know that Luda has her eyes on them. I can’t think of anything else because my brain thought it was ok to just asdfghjkl over Yeoreum. 9/10 on the gay scale.

edit: I completely forgot that she’s the resident window cleaner. I can’t believe i forgot her true dream job. She literally does it all the time. (much thanks @exycited!)

Dayoung (aka meme 2.0) is the most extra of them all. I don’t think she’s as loud as Eunseo (volume wise), but dear lord is she a close second. She drives all the unnies crazy, but makes up for it by taking care of them with food. She’s super gay and rolls around on the ground with Eunseo in the morning. With her variety skills, don’t be surprised to see her as an actress someday. Even though she’s Eunseo’s hug buddy #2, we all know she’s got that girl crush on charismatic leader Exy. 10/10 on the gay scale.

Yeonjung is the newest addition to the “let’s drive Exy nuts” line. Since we know how many high notes and long notes she can hit, it’s easy to say she’ll be the third, possibly the second, loudest member. But now that she’s the maknae, she’ll get away with it ;) This little cutie is undoubtedly sweet and will make a great addition to the family. I’m not exactly sure how gay she’ll end up being because we haven’t seen her with the other girls in videos yet, but time will tell. ?/10 on the gay scale.

ps. X and i’m dead serious when i say these guys are weirdos

i hope this helps! also, a lot of fandom inside jokes are in the post. I’ll try to link the posts so every one can see the true strangeness and gayness :)

quadruples  asked:

hello, i'm in love with oikawa and your tags on that hp au post have me Interested, because i love slytherin oikawa so much but i've never considered the ushioi dynamic in an hp au before?? ? so like. basically i really want 2 hear about your ideas for an hp au if you have any. sorry this is incredibly awkward pfffft!!

HELLO THERE, WONDERFUL PERSON.

Please do not apologize, this is not awkward at all, you have absolutely made my day and I am thrilled to have this opportunity to go on at length about an ushioi HP AU.

So clearly slytherin Oikawa is perfect and doesn’t even merit discussion, it’s so obvious and true. I’m also gonna go ahead and say that Oikawa is a half-blood, and that this takes place, oh idk, a decade or so after the events of HP–so even though Death Eaters are a thing of the past, prejudice against muggleborns is very much still A Thing, especially within Slytherin house. Oikawa is so charming and so good at being a Slytherin that he rarely gets any shit for being a half-blood, at least to his face. Oikawa is, naturally, very popular throughout the whole school, and he’s the Seeker for Slytherin and the Quidditch captain.

Now, Ushijima is such a weirdo that you could make a decent case for him being in Slytherin (he’s certainly ambitious), Hufflepuff (hella hard-working) or Gryffindor (brave, stubborn as fuck). I like him best as Gryffindor because of the potential comedy: he would 100% be absolutely hated by every other Gryffindor. Other Gryffindors would see him as unadventurous, never willing to do anything fun, boring, and generally Too Perfect. He’s Quidditch Captain (also plays Seeker) and a Prefect and completely unwilling to bend the rules for anyone in his house, he’s the Utter Worst. Also his family is super pureblood and super rich. 

Oikawa and Ushijima, of course, have been rivals on and off the quidditch field since second year, and going into their seventh year they’d both be competing for Head Boy, so the rivalry would intensify. Since they were eleven year olds, Ushijima has insisted that Oikawa should have been in Gryffindor instead of Slytherin, which pisses Oikawa off because he assumes it’s just the usual Gryff prejudice against Slytherins. And that was probably it when they were 12, but now it’s because Ushijima has always noticed the way people in Oikawa’s own house talk shit about him behind his back because of Oikawa’s half-blood status, and he disapproves. Oikawa should be in a house where the petty malice of Hogwartz’ more immature students can’t touch him. 

But considering Ushijima’s social skills, he’s unable to convey this every time he and Oikawa talk, and all their talks turn into confrontations. Oikawa resents that Ushijima has been born into privilege and that he’s so gifted at both magic and quidditch that upon graduation, he’ll be able to choose between a golden career at the Ministry of Magic or a golden career in professional quidditch. Oikawa has had to work hard and use every trick up his sleeve to get to where he is, whereas Ushijima has just been handed everything. The only thing that gives Oikawa any comfort at all is how much Ushijima seems to be despised by all the Gryffindors in his year, the people that should be his closest friends. (Oikawa refuses to see any similarities between Ushijima’s loneliness in Gryffindor and his own position within Slytherin, surrounded by friends he knows to be very, very false.) Ushijima only hangs out with the Quidditch team, and they probably only tolerate his presence because he’s led them to victory so often.

Things come to a head in the spring of their sixth year, when Gryffindor and Slytherin are slated to play each other for the Quidditch Cup. It’s come down to Gryffindor vs. Slytherin for the final match every year since Oikawa and Ushijima both made it onto their respective teams. On top of this, everyone knows that Head Boy next year will be either Ushijima or Oikawa, and the outcome of this match could probably have some influence over that decision. 

A week or so before the match, Ushijima surprises everyone by hexing a Slytherin fifth-year who’d been calling Oikawa “no better than a mudblood.” This makes waves through the whole school: Ushijima has never done anything to warrant detention before, and this particular detention will keep him away from quidditch practice for two days before the big game, when every hour of practice is absolutely essential. 

No one is more shocked to hear about it than Oikawa, and he’s also furious. What, so Ushijima’s so over-confident that he thinks he doesn’t need to even practice before facing Oikawa on the quidditch pitch? And how stupid is he, doesn’t he know that people call Oikawa mudblood and worse all the time? And why does he even care? What’s he playing at?

Uhhhhh the rest of this got extremely long so behind a cut it goes:

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anonymous asked:

LMAO, for real though! I've seen all kinds of best friends and they don't act like Jikook do. Look at how Jungkook is all over Jimin all the time. Touching him, leaning on him, being next to him, staring at him lovingly, making smile, teasing him... I'm not saying they're in love, but they're NOT 100% platonic! No way! :p

It’s the heart eyes man, THE HEART. EYES. Everyone can see it. Everyone but them

Because let’s be real, I hold hands, lean, hug and even occasionally squeeze the butts of my closest friends. But I don’t think I look at them like that?

Granted, I’m sure they have a lot more history together. The arduous trainees time, working from a small company to what they are now. I can never vouch for what the feelings may be, because we’ll never know. Whether or not feelings are romantic or not can often be a grey line, in my personal opinion. Because who knows? Even you ou may have hidden romantic feelings for your best friend rn *gasp*

But for me, Jikook is such an ideal of an OTP for me because they just do the right things. If I had a checklist for my perfect OTP, I’m pretty sure they would fill out most of the points: 

-the lowkey “love-hate”, because as we know, hate can take a whole lot of passion too ;P

-”opposites”: light & dark almost, but they compliment each other harmoniously (literally)

-the SMITTENNESS, the TENDERNESS they have for each other (did I say heart-eyes yet?). Like, when they finally do the deed together sparkles would fall out of ceiling and petals would rain down on them 

The list goes on. tbh, I got into Jikook because I just thought they sang well together, and clearly Jimin likes Jungkook etc. etc. But recently they’ve just been slaying so hard as an OTP. I mean, all those selfies they post make them look like boyfriends, their duo dance performances blow everything out of the water, their interactions literally resemble character development from a novel, and they just say and do things that convince you LOL

Anyways, I kind of rambled, but it’s true. Jikook is sketchy. And that’s probably one of their greatest quirks as a ship ^^

anonymous asked:

can you do a pastel!phil phanfic? i've never seen one :)

Title: A Good Different

Summary: Phil Lester absolutely hates the world, and everything in it. He doesn’t have any friends and he doesn’t get along with his parents either. But then he meets Dan Howell, who is different than most people he meets.

Pairing: phan

Genre: AU, Fluff

Word Count: 820

A/N: this is also kind of based off of this prompt from phanfic.

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anonymous asked:

What are your thoughts on the scene in LOT with Len talking to Sara about the future for 'me and you'? It still feels like such a weird and awkward scene for me. Especially with how cool this verison is meant to be.

Took me a while to respond to this because I wanted to actually give it the proper brain power that it’s due.

I actually enjoyed that scene, for a few reasons, not the least of which is because it was so supremely awkward. But the full effect of that line is really only understood in context of what led up to it. Len’s been opening up to Sara over the course of their entire journey up to that point, but only under the guise of helping her or as a deflection tactic.

Think of 1x05 where he tells her not to kill Martin – he’s exposing his own feelings, but he does so in such a way as to make it about her. He tells her not to kill because she doesn’t want to be a killer, without ever saying he doesn’t want her to kill Martin because he cares about his team, and because part of him hopes for redemption for himself. If Sara, the assassin, believes herself to be redeemable, maybe he can believe himself to be redeemable. That’s what you see between the lines.

But Leonard expresses his care without exposing himself. His care for Martin, and his care for Sara. The connection he feels to her, knowing what it’s like to be able to make hard choices without wanting to, knowing sometimes it’s harder to make the call not to kill (something we saw him do in The Flash 2x03, after all).

So Len was able to express without expressing, and get a lot of things across without leaving himself emotionally vulnerable. He’s much more charming when he doesn’t feel vulnerable, or when he doesn’t have to put his own feelings into words.

Then take the scene in the cargo hold in 1x10, where Sara is encouraging him to go talk to Mick, to talk about his feelings, and Leonard deflects by saying “about you?”

Originally posted by leonardsara

Which makes her pause for all of a second and before she narrows her eyes, because she sees through him, and knows that he’s really just attempting to deflect her. Which is not to say that he doesn’t have any genuine feelings about her, only that he wasn’t actually trying to start a conversation to talk about them in that particular moment. Still, the deflection was an opportunity to subtly express that yes, he’s been thinking about her, but he was able to do so at a time and in a way where it didn’t leave him feeling vulnerable (certainly not as vulnerable as talking about or to Mick would make him feel). And because he was bringing it up for disingenuous purposes, Sara was able to brush him off, but more than that, he was able to be charming and sly about it, able to protect himself and come off as smooth.

But then take 1x15, where he’s in a position that actually does make him feel vulnerable. Thinking about that scene, if Leonard was to be totally charming as he has been at times, he knows that not only would Sara see right through it, but it would come off as more disingenuous; he needs to be able to express something more real here. Because what he’s feeling is real, and he wants to acknowledge that, but that also leaves him feeling vulnerable. And if being sly and skirting around it or using it as a deflection (like in 1x10) didn’t work, he knows he’s gotta let her know that… this isn’t transient or surface for him, it’s not a tool he’s using to deflect or charm… it’s just him, and it means something that he’s feeling this.

And maybe if he felt totally confident, Leonard could have come off as charming and smooth there. But he didn’t feel confident. This isn’t a con where he can just say what he knows someone wants to hear. Leonard knew he’d have to express something real because she doesn’t put up with bullshit, but he’s not used to expressing his real emotions, not outside of life/death type situations, or not in a way that leaves him feeling exposed or gives others power over him. 

When he does express himself like that, he’s often using anger as a defense to help quell how vulnerable he feels. Or think about The Flash 2x09 where he tells Barry about Mardon and Jesse – helping the hero puts Leonard off-kilter, so he does it with all the theatricality and bluster he can muster, and still can barely look Barry in the eyes. Leonard hates feeling exposed, but he knows that anything less than that isn’t gonna’ fly if he wants something real with Sara.

Another reason he wouldn’t have felt confident is because… look at how he and Sara stack up. Sara is younger than him, absolutely gorgeous, incredibly strong and badass, not just an assassin but a vigilante hero who put a lot of guys like him behind bars, and is still somehow so incredibly down to earth that she doesn’t have an inflated ego, and she still sees right through him despite all that. She’s even expressed, directly to him, that she doesn’t like him all that much (when they were dying of cold, no less). 

Originally posted by quincyfisher

Leonard’s gotta feel at least a little intimidated in this situation. It’s a long-shot, and even if she might feel the same attraction and pull, there are still plenty of reasons she’d say no. Rejection is a very real possibility. But he still goes for it, because if he doesn’t, his chances are zero, and if he does, his chances at least exist, even if he doesn’t actually know his odds. 

So what does he do? He talks, in a roundabout way, about the future. About his own future, because he can’t help but start by making sure he enforces the idea that he’s looking out for Number One. But then he immediately switches to “and you.” He’s thinking about her future too. Where she’ll be, after all this. Thinking about her at all. And then the “and me and you.” 

Originally posted by lotsource

Originally posted by catvampcrazines

Sure, it’s awkward, and sure he has a hard time looking right at her when he says it until he’s laying the most important bit on the line, and sure it’s a little roundabout. But it’s real, and that’s why it fits. It’s vulnerable, but closed off because of it. And it’s a weird way to go about saying “I care about you and want a future with you” but that’s what he is saying, unmistakably. And that’s important because I don’t think Leonard has ever expressed that (romantic) sentiment to another human being, not in words, not when it was real for him.

And in a way, it actually is incredibly smooth. Because it doesn’t put her on the spot, or force her to respond. It gives her leeway to play it off (which she does) without making the situation awkward. It puts his thoughts and intentions out there in a way that won’t make her uncomfortable or force her to either accept or reject him. So he’s both shown courtesy for her, and also put himself in a position where unless she’s 100% certain she wants to reject him and chooses to right then, she doesn’t have to, and so he doesn’t actually set himself up for rejection at all. 

And well, because she’s not forced to act right then, she doesn’t… she hedges, in a flirtatious way, and neither of them leave that conversation feeling too exposed but both of them know for sure how Leonard feels.

Originally posted by legends-of-today

So in that way, awkward as the line may have seemed, it was… clever. Everything Leonard does is an emotional defense. The man is a mastermind at keeping himself safe, even here, even about this, which is unfamiliar territory to him.

So…. I loved the conversation. Had he laid it all on the line, it would have been too much. Had he played it off as a deflection or an idle flirtation, it wouldn’t have got his intentions across. If there was no vulnerability or exposure, it would have been too oozing with charm, which would have felt wrong, considering he was trying to express real emotions. If it has been totally charmless, it wouldn’t have been him

There are a few reasons why it could have felt awkward to you though. If you don’t ship captain canary, then seeing a non-ship or a notp interact romantically might have made you uncomfortable. If people interact romantically on screen when I can’t perceive any romantic chemistry between them (e.g., Ray and Kendra, for me), I cringe a bit. Or maybe it’s that you have this perception of Leonard where he’s always cool and suave, in part because we so seldom get to see him expressing more genuine, deeper emotions that make him feel vulnerable. When he does, it’s often anger that he’s expressing, using that as a defense against his vulnerability instead. So seeing him a little off his game might have butted up against your perception of him (but fits my perception of him because I think of Leonard as basically a giant awkward dork with a ridiculous and cheesy sense of humor. I mean, a murderous and competent dork, but a total nerd nonetheless). Or maybe it was the timing of it, which admittedly, it wasn’t the best time for him to be talking about his feelings, but I think part of him already knew how he was going to play this, how it might end, even if he was consciously in denial of his own willingness for self-sacrifice at that point. 

Anyway, hope this helps you consider that scene in a new light :)

anonymous asked:

Do you have any tips for connecting with animal spirits? I recently bought some coyote bones which turned out to have the spirit hanging around them. He's a sweetheart and communicated that he plans on staying, but he's also a little shy and quiet. I've been communicating mainly with a pendulum, but since I've never worked with an animal spirit before I'm a little lost on how to get closer to him. He's not yet ready to give me a nickname or visit in a dream but told me he plans on both.

Sounds like you’ve got a great start!

I generally read the question “How do I connect/bond with an animal spirit?” as “How do I make friends with an animal spirit?” And in my experience, the process winds up being this little mixture of making friends with an animal and making friends with a human.

Spend time with them. Let them know you want them to be a part of your life. If you go out hiking or just on a stroll, ask if they want to come along–and if they say “yes”, bring a bone with you. If you’re sitting at home on your computer, ask if they’d like to sit with you, and if they do, reach over and give them a touch every so often. (I’ll frequently be browsing tumblr with a deer skull or a pelt on the bed beside me.) Like, if you want to get all fancy and formal and ritualistic, you can, but my experience is that A) animal spirits tend to get impatient with ritual stuff, and B) casual hangouts are just great ways to bond with them. One time, I sat on the bed with my coyote pelt while we listened to the new Fall Out Boy album and I worked on a present for him, and it was probably one of the greatest spirit-experiences I’d had in a long time.

With newer or less-bonded spirits, I’ll ask before I do anything, but I have a kind of “understanding” of those who I’ve bonded closest to. So while I might ask one of my coyote tails “Would you like to be worn while I go out shopping today?” and wait for a response, I’ll frequently just grab my coyote pelt, Emon, off the wall without a word and just plop him on the bed next to me. “C’mon, dog, time to snuggle.” “Aww ye.”

But that’s also a matter of knowing the individual spirit. Like, Emon wouldn’t turn down a cuddle if his life depended on it, but my black bear Daru, while he enjoys snuggling very much, prefers to do it on his terms–meaning that if I try to grab him for lovins when he’s not interested, he’ll just be grumpy the whole time. 

Much like you wouldn’t constantly drag your human friends everywhere or be hanging off of them all the time, you do want to give your animal spirit friends some space and time for themselves. Even though Emon is pretty much always 100% down to cuddle, he does spend a fair amount of time hanging on his hook on the wall. It takes a lot, but I have seen him get overstimulated by touch and want nothing to do with cuddles (mostly when I’ve worn him to festivals or other events and everyone wanted to pet him), so I try to ensure he gets enough time to himself, both after big events and in general. When he’s hungry for a cuddle, he knows how to get my attention and ask for it.

So I’d say to just try to cultivate a friendship with this coyote spirit! Give him all the respect and attention you’d give a living, human friend. Coyotes are great friends–definitely one of my favorite animal spirits to work with–and I wish you the best with yours. <3

based off of jet lag (ft. natasha bedingfield) by simple plan

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eleanornoel  asked:

Hey there! I was wondering if you've ever had a really terrible, obnoxious roommate? And if so, how did you keep from punching them in the face? I've only got to make it until May with this one girl, but I am struggling to keep my cool. I figure if you've been in this situation, you probably have some pretty good stories to tell :)

oof, bad roommates are the worst. it’s really just SUCH a bag of dicks to have to live in a space that has an element that frustrates you or makes you uncomfortable. sorry you’re dealing with that, dude.

having had dorm/apartment roommates since the tender age of 13 (#boardingschool), i’ve definitely had experiences where there were, uh, troublesome elements??? as with most interpersonal conflicts, it’s not something that you can solve on your own because unfortunately, as you know, people.

anyway, here is my advice:

  1. first, and most importantly, decide whether these are issues that are worth working out. 
    1. what is your relationship with your roommate? is it a relationship that you value, and that you’re going to lose if you don’t solve your problems?
    2. are the things that are making your living space uncomfortable things that are dangerous or harmful to your physical or mental health?
    3. is your roommate a genuine asshole or does your roommate just not realize that they are being The Worst?
  2. if you decide that they’re worth working out, ask to talk to your roommate in like, a neutral place. go out for coffee or something. maybe jot down some notes before you go, so that you know sort of what you want to say.
    1. when you’re outlining the problem, try to stay calm. even if you’re in the right, i promise you that no one is going to respond to an attack with, “oh, huh, you’re right, i’ll adjust my behavior.”
    2. just be straightforward. “hey, it’s really been frustrating me that there’s a lot of noise in the apartment late at night when i’m trying to study. do you think that maybe we could like, agree to saying that after 9pm we’ll all listen to our music with headphones in and not have people stay over on weekdays?”
    3. have actions ready, not just “can you stop being like, such an asshole?” so that you can come out of it, hopefully, with concrete things that might help stop the issue.
  3. be aware that they might not react well, and/or might not see why those things are problems. just try to be as clear as you can. if they WON’T listen, hold your ground. it’s great when these discussions go well, but sometimes they don’t. it may be that your roommate is just like, NO FUCK U I CAN DO WHAT I WANT & BY THE WAY YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO CLEAN THE BATHROOM BECAUSE I’M ALLERGIC TO SOAP. in that case… 
    1. idfk, man. hold your breath until you can move out. be consistent and clear whenever a specific behavior happens. eventually, hopefully, your constant, “hey, can you turn your music down? hey, can you turn your music down? hey, can you turn your music down? hey, can you turn your music down? hey, can you turn your music down?” every day after 9pm might convince them to just KEEP THEIR FUCKING HEADPHONES ON AFTER 9 ON WEEKDAYS, WHAT THE FUCK, IT IS MIDTERMS.

if it’s just a personality issue, like your roommate is an unbearable person even though they aren’t necessarily doing anything rude, it’s just that THEIR FACE makes you want to FEED YOURSELF TO FIRE ANTS RATHER THAN LOOK AT IT, you can’t… really resolve that issue. try counting backwards from 100 whenever they annoy you, or do what i do, which is to close my eyes and pretend i am on Dance Party Island. nothing is wrong on Dance Party Island, and everyone’s got super sweet moves.

I keep seeing posts about people hoping Clarke becomes the new Commander of the grounders, and although I can maybe see how that might be desirable from a shipping perspective for CL fans, I don’t think that would actually be possible nor do I think Clarke would even want that. I mean, at the risk of opening Pandora’s Box here, let’s examine L’s story. She is introduced to us in the second season as a strong, seemingly ruthless leader by necessity if nothing else. Regardless of any respect, attraction or simple curiosity she may have felt towards Clarke in the beginning, she could not budge on her decision that Finn had to pay for the massacre of her people with more than just his life. This wasn’t just about her personal feelings or how she was raised to rule - this was about her people, and the fact that they would not accept anything less as payment for the people they lost. She may have started to like Clarke early on, but it wasn’t enough to risk being overthrown by her own people, and that’s why she couldn’t pardon Finn for his crimes no matter what Arkadia offered her in exchange.

Any doubt we may have had about how serious the consequences would have been back then is erased after she gives in to Clarke’s request this season that she take a more merciful approach, “blood must not have blood.” She goes against the ways of her people, against the expectation that blood will be spilled to get revenge for the lives that were taken, and ultimately it is the reason (narratively speaking) for her death. Titus sees that Clarke is not just a weakness for L, she’s a liability, one he fears will get her killed. When his attempts to reason with L fall on deaf ears, he tries to intervene on her behalf, likely hoping that by killing Clarke he will not only remove her from L’s inner circle but he will set her back to her “love is weakness,” mindset that it seems she may have only adopted after Costia’s death (much like Clarke tried to after Finn’s).

However, his plan tragically backfires and in trying to save L’s life, he becomes the reason for her death. And I feel like, in the understandable outrage over the social implications that her death carried for many fans, people forget that Clarke was not welcome in Polis. Arkadia was not welcomed as the 13th Clan. That did not change with L’s approval, and it is the very reason Titus feared for her life so much that he would risk hurting her by taking away someone she loved. I don’t have to tell anyone how taking L out of the equation would put Clarke in danger in Polis because we already saw that when she had to escape after L’s death.

The point I’m trying to get at here is that even if Clarke was somehow able to permanently become a genuine Nightblood and take the flame herself, L’s people would not accept her. You could probably argue that they would try in the beginning, because of their culture and their belief that the flame is the spirit of the past commanders and therefore whoever carries the flame carries the wisdom of all the commanders who came before, like the 100′s very own version of the Avatar. But Clarke is an outsider who doesn’t share their beliefs and, truthfully, probably never could. She wasn’t raised into it the way they were, and she can’t handle blood on her hands the way L could. Her entire storyline from the moment they met has been about showing us that. It’s not from lack of trying, because I think part of her came to envy L’s ability to rule strategically rather than emotionally, but in trying to emulate that Clarke made choices she realized she couldn’t live with. She understood the necessity behind them, just like she was able to understand why L thought her choices were necessary, but it was too much blood for Clarke to live with. That is why she left her people behind, that is why she spent all that time alone: because she didn’t want the responsibility of ruling and making the hard choices. She didn’t want to be responsible for anyone’s life but her own.

And from what we’ve seen of Clarke in the COL next week, it seems as though all Clarke really wants is to go back to the person she was before her hands were stained with blood she couldn’t wash away. She wants to go back to when things were simpler and it was just about learning to survive on the ground and not fighting to survive. Clarke’s storyline this season has been about a broken girl trying to make herself whole again, and I think she tried to do that with L but ultimately couldn’t. L’s world was not Clarke’s, and as much as she tried to become a part of it, and as much as she tried to change it, it was never really her home. It was an escape from her loneliness without having to face her demons. It was protection from her enemies while simultaneously being the best way to keep an eye on the situation. And it was an escape from her guilt, because Polis was the one place she wouldn’t face judgement for what she did. Even if she did, most of the people were strangers to her, and their opinion would not bear the same weight as the opinion of her friends and family. The only person in Polis she had any kind of bond with was L, and L was the last person who would judge her for Mt. Weather.

The entire point of staying in Polis was to take on a more passive role, the role of an ambassador, not a leader. She wanted to ensure her people’s survival from a distance, she wanted peace, and she wanted the alliance to work so they could stop fighting. We know she’s capable of making the hard choices; she just didn’t want to be the one who had to anymore. And her challenge moving forward became a question of who she is without that. I think it’s a question she’s still trying to find the answer to, but becoming the commander of the thirteen clans? I’m not so sure that’s the destination we’re headed towards. And I mean, there’s a reason Luna ran away from the conclave. She says she knows that she would have won and become their leader - but she ran away to start a settlement for people who were done fighting, who just wanted to live out their days in peace. Why else would she do that, unless she knew that kind of leadership would never be accepted by their warrior culture? And if it would never be accepted, what chance would Clarke have in leading them the way she might lead her own people? She never really fully embraced their ways and the fact that she sees herself in the COL as the person she was when they first landed suggests she doesn’t really want to, and the fact that she was trying to teach L to lead differently supports this.

I’m not really sure yet where the narrative is trying to take Clarke, other than she’s on a long journey to forgiving herself and finding her way back and I feel like even if she would be accepted in taking L’s place as commander, it would only make things worse in the long run. I’m open to discussion if someone sees it differently, but right now I just… don’t. I mean, either Clarke leaves her people behind again which doesn’t make sense considering the second half of the season has been about her finally coming home and facing them, or the two groups merge and become one the way L wanted them to and the way the first half of the season proved they couldn’t. Sure, they have a common enemy right now in ALIE but it’s not the first and it hasn’t erased the mistrust they feel toward each other. Maybe some day that will be possible, if they can ever reconcile their differences and embrace each other’s culture without erasing it, but they’ve still got a long way to go before reaching that point and somehow putting an outsider in their Commander’s throne doesn’t seem like the way to get there.

anonymous asked:

True story: I've blacklisted DtA on my twitter feed because my mutuals talk about it CONSTANTLY and it makes me so, so insanely jealous of the fic's impact on them and growing popularity.

Dearest nonny—

I have to first-person this reply, because your note moved me to the bones.

First of all, as someone who, whether wisely or foolishly, decided to devote her life to trying to be a writer,—well, as we say on tumblr, I know that feel. Boy howdy do I know that fucking feel. Writerly envy is a real thing and it’s like swallowing a hot brick halfway and then carrying that around inside your throat hour after hour after endless motherfucking hour. So I’m all about blacklisting, freely and at will, anything that’s gonna cue you to feel like less than your fabulous self. It’s part of why I’ve turned off anon on my main blog, you know?

(Also I can tell from this sentence you’re a real writer. Can’t hide that.)

Then, musing on what you wrote, I started thinking of Richard Hugo’s slim little book of poetry craft, The Triggering Town. It’s a fine sort of basic “starter manual” for beginning poets, and I often teach it to intro workshops. And in it, Hugo says—and I’m too lazy to look this up, so forgive the paraphrase—something like: “Whenever I meet a writer who is jealous of the work of other writers, I know this is someone who hasn’t written their best work yet.”

I took that on board pretty seriously, when I was a beginning poet in my twenties and I existed in a perpetual stomach-gnawing crisis of jealousy of everyone else’s superior work (or just, work that others regarded as superior), which manifested every time I blinked. After reading this in Hugo, I sort of made a command decision that, every time I felt envious, I’d turn back to my own work and try to figure out what that other writer’s achievements were pointing me towards. Was I jealous of their range, their technical abilities, their imagery, their sounds, their diction—what? Could I drag those things into my own work?

This sounds very preachy and, not being you, I have no idea if it’ll help or hurt. What I do know is that eventually I stopped being envious of other writers and it was so liberating, because now I can just wallow in their work like a happy sow in mud, and celebrate when my friends get published and promoted (NB by the way that I’ve been in writing programs with three Booker Prize and two National Book Award winners. Try finding mudita/sympathetic joy in your heart for that shit. I’ve been turned down for a Stegner I don’t know, five or six times? One of my students won a Stegner a couple of years ago. The struggle, my friend? It is real).

It probably also helped that I started reading writers INFINITELY above my paygrade, whose achievements I could literally never hope to duplicate or even emulate. Once you read a bunch of, I don’t know, Edith Wharton or Whitman or Dickinson, Tsvetaeva or Dostoyevsky or David Foster Wallace, something in you eventually snaps and you get it.

The good news is that if writing is work, it’s only work; and it’s yours to do.

I remember the afternoon my undergraduate advisor finally got fed up with me—I was about 26 years old, my senior year of college (at last), in her office moaning and wailing about how I would never be as good as TS Eliot (for some reason he was the poet I was fixated on, at that particular moment). After putting up with this handwringing for a long time, she looked at me and snapped: “Forget being him—do you even know who you’re supposed to be?!”

I didn’t, of course. I had no idea—I hadn’t even thought about it, because I was so busy comparing myself to everyone else.

(From 26 to 46 has been a long fucking learning curve.)

I keep assuming people know this, but the whole reason I decided to start what’s turned into a terrifyingly aggressive pro-DtA movement is that when I finished A Thousand Lights in Space, it had fewer than 100 kudos. Fewer. Than. 100. Kudos. And I just couldn’t wrap my brain around that, when other fics I loved—maybe even yours, nonny!—had kudos numbering in the thousands. It seemed tragic to me that someone would spend years of her life writing eight or nine novels in a series, and fewer than 100 people would read them all and like them. I couldn’t live with that, so I wrote a ficrec—and it kinda snowballed from there.

It’ll still never be a very popular fic, either, by most definitions of popular (lbr, how many people do we both know who’ve read all of Henry James?)—so don’t be deceived by thinking that a dozen or even a couple dozen extremely enthusiastic people equal a juggernaut fandom. You just happen to be a bacon-lover surrounded by a bunch of excitable people who just went vegan, sounds like. It’ll blow over, and there’ll be the next big thing.

Final thought: you can also ask your friends to a) shut the fuck up and b) pay some attention to you? I recommend this highly, though it’s like a ninja-level move. (And as Agincourt Dean says, when Cas gets jealous about his spending time elsewhere: “People get into new things, they become old things, and it happens; you just deal with it, tell ‘em to cut out that shit if it reaches critical, but you do not turn it into a fucking tragedy for the ages!“ Maybe you need to ask your friends to CUT OUT THAT SHIT.)

Again, though, I just wanna say—nonny: please do take care of your sweet self. Life is too goddamned short (endverse fans know this) for things that upset your equilibrium or rock your equanimity and leave you feeling less-than, when you are MORE-THAN, and way enough. So much enough. So very important to the story.

2

So I wrote this as the possible beginning to a ‘The 100′ fic about four months ago.  I might pick it up again.  I just decided I might as well share it with you guys. It’s not a fic with any intended pairing.  It’s not romance driven in any way.  I just had an idea for a character and went with it.  I hope you like it.


Transcendence


Prologue - The Ballad of Davy Lachlan, For Those of You That Give a Shit

Apparently there was this saying back on the Earth. ‘In space, no one can hear you scream’. I’m really not sure where that saying came from. It sounds like a line out of some second rate book. Whoever wrote it definitely didn’t have any idea what the hell they were talking about. You can hear people screaming in space. I’m pretty sure everybody on the goddamn Ark has heard me scream at one point or another. When you’re living in a structure that’s made entirely out of metal, sound seems to carry. Echoes and all that.

Yup. That whole 'nobody can hear you scream’ thing is total bullshit. If you want an accurate quote for your morbid, nihilistic ranting I’d go with something more along the lines of this:

'In space, nobody really gives a shit if you’re screaming.’

Am I starting off bitter? I guess I kind of am. It’s not like I mean to. It just sort of comes naturally to me. I mean, I understand the rules. I understood them when I got myself mixed up in all of this. It was my choice. I knew what I was getting myself into. Consequences. Such a freaking dramatic word. All those syllables. It was the first lesson they drilled into your head when you were a kid, along with 'the earth was fried in a nuclear Holocaust’ and 'the Ark is all that’s left of humanity’. It’s kind of a lot of pressure if you think about it-the expectation that if you screw up too badly you might end up being the demise of the entire human race.

Living in space 101: Be good.

Sounds simple, right? You do something bad, you get floated. That’s a cute euphemism, isn’t it? 'Floated’. I mean, they had to come up with something. I doubt 'shoving someone into an airlock and letting the fly out in zero-G so they can expand like a balloon and have their internal organs explode inside of them’ will look too good in the history books. Plus it’ll just take up too much space on a page. It’s important to be concise.

Also, unexpected pun! Too much 'space’ on the page. Get it?

That was terrible. I hate myself for making that joke. Pedestrian at best.

In other news, I’m honestly not sure why they bother with the 'no floating until they’re 18’ rule anymore. Really all they’re doing is delaying the inevitable. I can’t remember the last time the Counsel didn’t decide float a delinquent minor once they came of age. Which really means that I, along with however many underage idiots are locked up with me, are basically biding our time before we bite it. There’s some alliteration for you. And while the alliteration is great, in reality all you get is wasted oxygen and a lot of teenage angst. And if we’re all being honest, teenage angst IS just a waste of oxygen, am I right? But then again, maybe I shouldn’t be advocating for the Counsel to kill me sooner. Who knows? I might be a valuable resource. 

Now there’s a real laugh for you.

Anyways, back to my semi-coherent rambling. There’s this plaque outside my cell. It goes a little something like this:

NAME: Davy Lachlan
CODE: Prisoner 164
CRIME: Theft, Threat of Bodily Harm
DATE OF INCARCERATION: June 2nd, 2141
DATE OF SENTENCING: October 1st, 2149

That’s it. That’s all there is. All the relevant information about my lovely self. A concise little summary of my life, right through the end. Even though the end hasn’t quite happened yet. You know, when they shoved me in this cell at the tender age of nine, all that information was shining on this neat little digital display in glowing red letters. It all looked so official. But that was then. By now that tech had probably been salvaged for some other more noble purpose.

About a year and half ago there was this strep outbreak that landed me in the med bay. I was still a little delirious when they brought me back to my cell, but my mental faculties didn’t all have to be in play to notice the gaping hole in the wall next to my door where that display was supposed to be. Instead I’m pretty sure I just saw tape and some scribbled letters. They might have spelled something coherent, but I was either too high or too sick to tell the difference. Super dignified, isn’t it?

I feel like I’m posing a lot of questions here. All of them are rhetorical. It’s been a while since I realized that reasonable questions rarely ever get reasonable answers. Or any answers at all, except for that one universal one. 'Because’.
This is the first journal entry I’ve ever made, and it’ll probably be my last. Nobody’s ever going to read it, including me. It’s probably boring. Literally nothing has happened to me. And even worse, I’ve never made anything happen. Except for that one, supremely stupid thing that got me locked up in the first place. That was pretty awesome. At least the level of stupidity involved made it infamous, and that was something.

But anyways, other than that it’s been four walls and a series of temporary roommates. I haven’t gotten enough practice being interesting to not be boring. Especially not for a few scraps of thrice recycled paper (note the use of the word thrice, I feel like Shakespeare), which will soon be surreptitiously shoved in an air vent. If nobody finds them, they’ll probably disintegrate into dust. If somebody does find them, they’ll probably throw them out without looking. Who the hell cares anyway, right?

That was another rhetorical question. I know nobody does. It’s one of the beautiful constants of my world. Nobody ever cares. It makes things less complicated. And simplicity is elegant. I’m really freaking elegant.

I guess the actual question here is, why am I writing this to begin with? I’m not sure. It’s not because I have an urge for other people know my story, what little story there is. And I’m not trying to create some sort of grand message. I think I just like the idea that there’s someting out there with my name on it that will exist after I’m gone. These tiny bits of scratch paper might last longer than me.

My name is Davy Lachlan, and I’m going to die soon. Though, if someone is actually reading this, you’ve probably already worked that out by now. Everything I wrote sounds super-morbid.

SIDE NOTE: I just thought of something. If this paper does turn into dust and circulate through the vents, it’ll be in the air. Everybody on this damn station will inhale it. My words will literally become part of them. That’s pretty cool. But again, super-morbid.

Song for the Prologue: Loves Ashes - Sachin Raj
DISCLAIMER: I don’t own The 100!