so i made it like b&w

the main difference b/w bi women and lesbians, besides who we are attracted to, is that bi women use dual wield weapons and lesbians use one larger weapon. the dps is about equal but lesbians excel at single target and bi women are good at aoe, so i would suggest having at least one of each in your party for endgame discourse

3

[ revision log printable + google sheets ] — reviewing course material is an excellent way to retain information over the long term! to use for my exams, i made a little revision google sheet and a matching printable, which i’ve decided to share with the community (●っゝω・)っ~☆

✨ — at the time i didn’t realize it, but this is inspired by @s0manythings​‘ beautiful grade tracker printable + sheet set! go have a look!

✅ ——

  1. feel free to tag with #studykyt if you use.
  2. credit if necessary and don’t claim as your own!
  3. modifications are ok for personal use!
  4. i worked really hard on this, so likes + reblogs are much appreciated ♡ 

•  printable pdfs, available in 5 colors ( bubblegum, lavender moon, seafoam, silver & gold, studykyt colors ) + b&w version ( skyscraper ) + bonus color ( field berries ).

•  google sheets, available in 5 colors + bonus sheet ( field berries ). to use file in your drive, file ↬  make a copy. no drive? file ↬ download as ↬ microsoft excel.

• instructions manual on how to use the google sheet.

🔗 — printables  google sheet • manual

☆ — originals  more printables

—— happy studying! :: kyt / studykyt

10

#TheSquint for @shipnation

U R B A N ~ W I T C H  [spotify playlist]

I haven’t seen any urban/chill witchy playlists, so I made my own. There’s 70+ songs in the playlist so I won’t bother listing them all, but it’s a grab bag of experimental, ambient, chillhop, and some jazz-inspired electronic with artists like CFCF, Mujo, and o k h o. 

4+ hours of chill musical goodness, curated by yours truly for all your urban witch needs.

Rude Boy (2)

Pairing: Bucky X Reader

Words: 2489

Warnings: SMUT. NSFW gifs (may have gotten carried away with those).

Summary:  You go undercover with Bucky where you need to get a flashdrive from a HYDRA agent who frequents a men’s club. Your job is to give him a lap dance, get him knocked out, and steal the flash drive. Things don’t go as planned because someone gets a little jealous and decides to, quite literally, knock the agent out.

A/N: Here ya go. Wrap it before you tap it kids.

Permanent Tag List: @meganlane84 @mizzzpink @bringmetheemobands

Part 1

Keep reading

Haircut

Summary: Bucky finally cuts his hair after many decades but the only problem is that you don’t like it and end up throwing a funeral for his hair. 

Word Count: 1,225

A/N: This was supposed to be a short drabble but of course I made this a little longer than I anticipated it to be, but fuck it!

Originally posted by thesoldierchildren

Keep reading

sigmastolen  asked:

re: how teens and adults text, I would be super interested for you to explain your theory!

ok SO. a lot of this comes from various stuff i’ve seen on the linguistics of tumblr, but at the heart of it is that people in my generation (at least in the us; idk abt other countries’ timelines on this front) went thru (or are still going thru) our Formative Social Years in an environment where we’d regularly interact with even our closest friends on text-only platforms (whether texting or gchat or fb messages or w/e), and b/c so much linguistic/social information is actually conveyed by facial expression and tone of voice, we’ve collectively made up all of these textual ways of conveying that in a concise, efficient way

so like, sometimes on this blog i’ll talk about “straight people”, and sometimes i’ll talk about “str8 ppl”, and even tho i would pronounce those the same, the first is much more neutral — it would probably happen in the context like “i’m not sure how i feel about straight people writing stories that center around experiences of homophobia” — than the second, which which is much more frustrated/venting — it would be more likely to crop up in the context of “all i want is to live quietly in my little queer utopia but no str8 ppl have to come along and heteronomativity UGH #over it #whatever #NOT RLLY OVER IT”. or even with more subtle things like end punctuation: “i’m not going” basically just means i’m not currently planning to go to the thing; “i’m not going.” carries much more of a connotation of “i have seriously considered going and have Reasons for staying at home” (and note that capital — “i have Reasons for staying at home” feels different than “i have reasons for staying at home”). (and this isn’t even getting into things like shitposting or advanced memeology, but there are specific textual markers that go with things like that, some of which would be pronounced if you read them aloud, but many of which wouldn’t be)

but, crucially, for these kinds of things to carry meaning, they have to be used consistently: if i use “str8 ppl” and “straight people” interchangeably in all contexts (as i do for something like “the supreme court” vs “scotus”), then there’s no way to develop a distinction in meaning between the two — the only way to do that is to consistently use the different orthographies in different contexts. (to take another example: if something is “great”, then it’s solidly good. if something is “gr8”, it’s more in the land of “i can’t quite believe this is as earnest/tacky/tasteless as it is but i’m weirdly into it anyway?” (sometimes with a side helping of “do i just enjoy this ironically or do i genuinely enjoy it there is no way of knowing please send help”))

the upshot of this is that to be fluent in tumblr (or texting, or fb messenger, or w/e) means to actually be paying a lot of attention to subtle points of grammar and spelling, to know when to use “did u kno” or “ur” or even pull out an old-fashioned tip of the hat to “e733T haxxor 5killz”. most of these are very subtle distinctions, the kind of things you feel intuitively rather than write out explicitly, and so it’s very hard to convey them concisely and accurately to someone who’s not already immersed in the linguistic environment

and let’s be real, people in my parents’ generation aren’t. i mean, sure, many of them have facebook accounts, but these kinds of platforms weren’t around when they were in their “really getting to grips with social interaction” years, and their most important social interactions usually don’t take place exclusively online. for me, all of my closest friends are people i’ve only interacted with online for more than a year now (with a few brief face-to-face visits when various travel arrangements have allowed), so tumblr, facebook, and gchat are absolutely critical to my social life and interpersonal interactions; for my parents, their closest friends are people they see in person at work every day, so social media is a light overlay to their social lives, not the thrumming core

as such, my parents don’t grok these distinctions. to them “what are you doing?” means the same thing as “lol wut r u doing”; “gr8” is just like “great” (and “gr9” takes some parsing … ); dogespeak doesn’t have the same distinctive valence that it does to us. since they don’t know about these distinctions, they don’t feel the need to maintain more “proper” spelling/grammar when texting with a friend — different people have different set points for this, obvs, but in general i feel like “standard (setting aside all the class and racial implications in that term …) spelling and grammar” (with lighter-than-standard punctuation and capitalization) translates to “relatively neutral/pleasant conversational voice”, and then deliberate misspellings, abbreviations, letter substitutions, and grammar deviations are markers used to indicate shifts in mood — i have a vague sense that bitterness tends to collapse down and preserve grammar but weird spelling (“lyk w/e im happy 4 u but pls, i kno u lied 2 get that”) whereas enthusiasm tends to preserve spelling but weird grammar (“what i can’t even no how do air AMAZE”). since people in my parents’ generation don’t realize that doing so unintentionally changes the way their words come across, they feel free to text “poorly” (ie with lots of errors/substitutions, generally mixing various text-flagged vocal tones in ways that are often incoherent) in order to do so more quickly (b/c lbr typing everything out can be a pain (esp on a non-smartphone), and since parents don’t do it as much, they’re not necessarily as fast as our spry young fingers on a familiar interface)

so yeah, that’s what i suspect is going on

tl;dr: parents don’t use orthography to mark vocal tone in the way youngfolk do, and thus feel free to condense their texts and otherwise use textspeak. youngfolk are using orthography to mark for tone, and thus text more “correctly” to preserve their social intentions

2

THE DEATH OF B&W ON THE ASHES OF ILIWYS

Matty’s rando post of the day reminded me of a pile of ash. The ashes of I like it when you sleep…I altered the orginal comic a bit to reflect the upcoming changes (see pink Matty is holding b&w Matty now, and others). I wanted to give the full version (left) but also the minimal version (right), because I really love both. Music for Cars will rise from the ashes.

10

I love to do colored drawings, but I know many of you really like the b&w with colored eyes or highlights.
His eyes are my fave thing to draw, along with his hands. So I decided to put some of them together for you. 💞 I also made up my mind about Raúl drawing 126, but I guess I’ll just make various sketches later, to see what I like most. So prepare yourself for a little sketch inferno later lol.

Reggie Mantle x Reader PART TWO: THE ARTIST & THE JOCK

I cant believe people actually liked this, I honestly thought nobody would like it, but I got 84 notes as of now. I really want to thank you guys for liking it and rebloging it. I am currently writing part three so hopefully, you guys like where this is going.

Words: 1585

Pairing: Reggie x Reader

Summary: Dinner b/w The Mantles and (Y/L/N) with a bit of a twist at the end. 

Spoilers: Cute, fluff flashback b/w Reggie and the Reader.

A/N: I had fun writing this so hopefully you guys like it! 

Part One

You arrived home practically speeding home, since for business dinners, your father wants everything at its best. But before arriving you stopped by the flower shop to get tulips for Reggie’s sister Riley (I made this character up) and Pink Roses for his mom Vicky (this is his moms name in the comics). Hoping these were still there favorite type of flowers.

Mom! Dad! I’m home!” You shouted opening the door to your home.

“(Y/N) you’re a bit late, now go on and start getting ready” your father answers you.

“Sorry dad, I stopped at the flower shop as quickly as I could to get flowers for Riley and Mrs. Mantle.” You spoke up and your mother gives you a smile

“Well that’s sweet, now go on take a shower and start getting ready, do you want to give them like that or should I find a vase for them?” your mother asks

“No just like this, I think, you don’t want my help getting the stuff ready?” You question them.

“No honey” your parents answer in sync

“Okay” You nodded and went up the stairs to start getting ready. Wondering why they were acting strange about you looking nice since they usually didn’t care as long as you tried.

You turned on your music and got in the shower, then If we were a Movie by Hannah Montana started playing on shuffle, and you couldn’t help but smile and start singing along to the song that brought a great memory to you.

Flashback:

If we were a movie
You’d be the right guy
And I’d be the best friend
That you’d fall in love with in the end

You and Reggie were watching TV at his house, both 9 years old. You persuaded him to let you watch Hannah Montana with him. His parents were away with Riley at the clinic.  He would pretend he wasn’t enjoying it, but you’d catch him smiling every now and then. You sang along to those lyrics dancing around the living room.

Wish I could tell you there’s a kiss
Like something more than in my mind
I see it could be amazing

Then Reggie got up from the couch and started to walk away, when you grabbed him and made him dance with you. He squirmed to get away, but defeated he did what he knew would get him off your grip. He pretended to start slow dancing with you, so his hands reached your waist and he started to tickle you. You ended up on the floor laughing/screaming “Please! Reg! Stop! Its hurts!”  until you ran out breath to speak. He removed himself and brought water for your dry mouth.

That day was great for you because you and Reggie were growing up and your little group was growing and sometimes you just wanted to spend time with him. You were both about to turn 10 and your parents promised to take you two camping.

Turning off the shower, you grabbed your towel and started to get ready for the dinner. You dried off your hair so you could curl it. A smile plastered on your face to the memory that was now flooding your brain. You could not get yourself to think about anything else, and thought nothing about the fact you could not get Reggie of your mind, you simply pushed that away by lying to yourself that maybe it was better this way since you would have to deal with him and his parents.

You ignored the fact that the memory made you think so much about the old Reggie, Oh the old Reggie was so charming, caring, and you were the only girl in his universe until his sister showed up in your lives when you both were 7 and throughout the years you started drifting apart, not because of her, but the fact that growing up meant changing and you both were no longer into the same things anymore.

It was now 6:50pm as you applied red chapstick, since you weren’t a big fan of makeup, you kept it simple with a bit of black eyeliner to match your dress as well since that’s all you could do.

Your heart sunk the moment you realized you had no dressy shoes, mentally preparing yourself for your mothers’ wrath. You recently bought new converse, and you decided to pair them with “fancy” looking black socks.

It was now 7:00pm when you heard the doorbell ring. And you heard you parents call you, so you made your way out of your room and down the stairs.

You couldn’t help, but smile at Reggie.

He looked amazing in that maroon blazer, white shirt, and black pants. You were glancing at him until your mom took you out of your trance.

“Well well” your mother spoke up “look how handsome you have turned out” She directed a smile at Reggie

You were reaching the last steps and you felt Reggie’s eyes on you.

Man, she looks so beautiful Reggie thought

“(Y/N) you look amazing” was what came out of his mouth as he reached his hand towards you, and you grabbed it and finally made to the last step.

“Um, these are for you (Y/F/Flowers), hopefully they’re still your favorite” you nodded at him as you took the flowers in your hands and you were both staring at each other until Riley broke it by hugging you.

“I missed you sooo much (Y/N)!” The brown haired girl with a huge smile on her face spoke.

“I missed you so much too! Look I got you flowers too” you grabbed her hand leading her to the kitchen island where her and Mrs. Mantle’s bouquets resided. Your dad led the family to the dining room.

“I got you flowers too Mrs. Mantle” you declared when you walked in the dining room with Riley and she took the seat across yours.

“Oh that’s so sweet, but please hold them for now” you nodded “And please call me Vicky” she added on and you smiled placing her bouquet on a small table in the dining room.

As you were about to take your seat, Reggie got up grabbed your chair, so you could sit in it and pushed you in, and took the seat next to you and you both couldn’t help but smile at each other. The parents were on their own side of the table as our mothers brought in the food.

“So what business are you guys doing together?” you spoke looking directly at your father and Mr. Mantle after a few minutes.

“I am going to start a practice at the hospital” your father spoke up taking a drink of his merlot.

“I am going to pitch in some money, to help your father out start the practice” Mr. Mantle added on.

There was a bit of shift in the mood of the dinner now and you somewhat regretted that you asked.

“This Garlic, Basil Chicken is great Mrs. (Y/L/N) the tomato butter sauce really makes it pop” Reggie spoke up to get rid of the awkward silence that you started and you smiled at him and he returned it.

“Why, thank you so much Reggie” your mother spoke up while your father and Reggie’s father glanced at each other.

You and Reggie started to talk, as your parents held up their own conversation and Riley was playing games on her tablet with headphones plugged into her ears you would turn to see the 10 year old, so into her little world.

“Well” Mr. Mantle spoke up “I hope you can keep your end of the bargain” and the dining room went silent, so silent you could even hear the crickets outside chirping.

“(Y/N) do you like Reggie?” Mrs. Mantle broke the silence and you choked on the water you were drinking.

“I really hope you do because your parents and I would love for you guys to date, right?” She kept going and you were so confused as to what was going on and all the parents smiled.

You looked at Reggie who was staring down at his plate with a somber look on his face.

“Um, what is going on?” You finally spoke up and Mr. Mantle and your dad handed you a small stack of papers.

“This is a contract your father has signed in our partnership in the practice, in return I would like for you to date Reggie, during any events we have since he is not popular for his attitude and with you we could have an advantage to these fundraising events” Mr. Mantle spoke up “See honey you are sweetheart, compared to Reggie” he added on.

“You would make it look like he was changing his ways” Your father spoke up and your mother and Mrs. Mantle were just smiling.

You were speechless, you couldn’t get a word out, you could not believe your ears as to how Reggie’s parents were talking about him or your parents who didn’t seem to care about you to agree to such a thing in exchange for money. Instead your body took over and you stood up from your chair and walked out.

Reggie’s POV:

I couldn’t believe the way my parents did that, we had agreed that I would ask her out like a normal teenager. We were 16, and throughout the days I made it my mission to start changing, I know she noticed; but now that plan was out and I had to go out and look for her.

Tags: @sgarrett49 @oharchiekinz 

Part Three - Part Four - Part Five - Part Six

INTERNET FRIEND EUNWOO PART 1

i had to make this 2 parts (maybe 3 we will see) cause i was almost at 5 k and you and eunwoo still havent met so like, it had to be 2 parts

Originally posted by astrodaily

  • So its finals season, you are dying because of AP testing/revisions/big mean tests that give you too  much stress
  • Should you be studying cause these tests that have a huge impact on your grade? yes
  • But will you? I mean technically yes,,,
  • It still counts as studying if you are looking at studyblrs right??? totally
  • You end up finding a blog that posts study tips and weekly updates of their bullet journal
  • Tbh they look like they have their life together bc sometimes you see some moodboards of their desk and like healthy smoothies with like,, kale, and spinach
  • Their url is @morningwakeupcall Wow even their url makes it     seem like they have their life together
  •  You follow their blog because it’s pretty and you like pretty things, so you close tumblr because it’s 11pm you really should start studying
  •  Your life doesn’t really change after that, sometimes instead of jungkook’s abs on your dash now you see a  pretty bullet journal 
  •  One day you’re scrolling through tumblr and you see a picture of bts at the bbms in @mornginwakeupcall ‘s bullet journal 
  •  You’re dying on the inside because!!! One of your favorite groups!! Is in that journal!!! that someone who has their life together!!!  
  • O h  m y
  •  You reblog the post and add a bunch of !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and keyboard smashes in the tags 
  •  You feel very happy and kinda like a proud mom that this guy likes bts too 
  • You decide you’re gonna send them an ask (on anon of course you feel hella awkward showing them who you are,, what if they think you are a weird stalker online no thank you you’re not about that life) 
  • Before you send them the ask     you wait like 6 minutes so they maybe won’t think that the kpop blog that     just reblogged thier kpop themed bullet journal sent them an ask, like this     is some 007 james bond shit right here you gotta take some precautions 
  •  After the 6 minutes have passed     you double checked that you pressed anon, and send the ask
  •  You’re sitting there on your phone refreshing his dash smh why are you so invested in this just to see his response- oH SNAP HE ANSWERED

Keep reading

|Two Boys, Same Kiss| Peter Parker

Peter Parker x Reader ;3

Summary: It’s you and Peters’ sixth month anniversary but you get in robbed on the way to his apartment. Thank God Spider-Man is there to save you… and kiss you??

Warning: cute i think… probably, kissing, knife, confessions, lol bad writing :D

Words: 738

I NEED REQUESTS I’M DYING INSIDE- I CAN’T WAIT FOR THIS GODDAMN MOVIE

~~~~~~~~~~~~

I walked down the street late at night after going to the corner store to get some chips and drinks. Tonight was Peter and Is’ sixth month anniversary. We were gonna just watch a movie and cuddle.

“God- today has been the best day and I can’t wait to be in Peters’ arms.” I mumbled to myself, smiling. I put my change back into my wallet but while doing so heard a faint ‘shhe’ sound. I turned and say a knife being pointed at me. I screamed when my attacker advanced at me but then covered my mouth.

“Give me all you’ve got.” He yelled. My eyes widen and I looked at my wallet. Oh shit. I hardly breathed and did as he said. Tears stung my eyes as I took out the few dollars I had. Just as I looked back up at him a familiar man in a red and blue suit swung down and kicked him against the wall. Spider-Man. He webbed him against it so he couldn’t move. He lifted his mask over his nose and ran up to me, holding my arms.

“Are you all right?” He asked. I nodded and he pulled me in for a hug. “Oh- thank God.” My face probably looked really confused cause I had no clue why this man, who is friggin Spider-Man, was hugging me and saying that he’s glad I’m ok. He pulled away and did another unexpected thing. He kissed me. Oh my God. Spider-Man was kissing me. And I liked it. His lips tasted sweet, like cherry chapstick. He leaned back pulling his mask back down. He saw my face, which was probably as red as a tomato, and silently said 'shit’.

“W-What- wa-”

“I-I have to go- I-I’m s-sorry. Ha, I guess I thought you- were someone else… or.. somethin- Bye!” He stuttered and then webbed at a building beside us. He was so fast that my eyes couldn’t even follow him. I just kissed Spider-Man. But Peter… I feel so bad.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I walked into Peter’s apartment and made a b-line for his room, waving at May on the way. I opened the door and saw Peter putting on a shirt on, but my mind was too clouded to be affected by his… nevermind. I was affected by him being shirtless. My face was beat red for the second time this night. He turned to me.

“H-Hey- babe.” He stuttered. He never stuttered around me. He knows. Maybe not but what if he does! He might have seen me and- “Babe?” I shook my head.

“Wha- Hi-” He smiled and then walked over to me, giving me a peck on the lips… Cherry chapstick? Strange. Oh god maybe I’m delusional and my mind is tricking me into remembering Spider-Mans lips.

“How was your night?” He asked while talking the bags out of my hands.

“I-It was… a night.” I said as I sat on his bed.

“Did-”

“I need to tell you something. And you can’t hate me- please.” I blurted out. He looked at me and blushed.

“I would neve-”

“I kissed someone else!” I bit my lip after said the last word. I still felt really guilty tho. I can’t just kiss some other guy and enjoy it. I had to fess up. Peter sighed. Oh no… is he mad? He walked over to his closet and grabbed something. What was he doing? I stood up and looked over his shoulder. “What are you doing, Peter?” I asked. He turned to me holding something red and blue. It looked like a onesie.

“You didn’t kiss another guy babe.” He said. I looked at the onesie again but… it wasn’t a onesie. It all set it. Spider-Man was…

“P-Peter you'r-” He moved his hand towards me and a web shot from his wrist. It attached to hip and he pulled me to him. He dropped his suit and wrapped his arms around me. I gasped. For a second I got angry. “Oh- I can’t belie-” He shut me up by kissing me. Now I could connect the two. Both Spider-Man and Peter both used cherry chapstick, and both of them had smooth yet somehow still chapped lips. I couldn’t be mad at him for keeping a secret like this so I kissed him back. After a bit he pulled away he looked at me.

“You’re not mad?” He asked. I shook my head and smiled.

“Why would I be? My boyfriend is Spider-Man.”

the-alpacat  asked:

I can imagine one of the timelines being so silly and stupid like: XGaster: OK YOU STUPID KIDS WE'RE GOING ON OUR F*CKING RACKET SHAP TONIGHT XSans (remember he isn't Cross yet): B-But Father, we don't have a racket shap.. XPaps: IHAVENOIDEAWHATISGOINGON! XUndyne: GIVE ME MY FISH CHIPS. XToriel: Hullo. I have made a Blanket pie and a Lamp pie! XAsgore: I have crippling depression! XAlphys: i want my anime Frisk and Chara: *silent hues*

That could be a good plot for Andarvarsa >w>

Traditional Art Giveaway!

So I’m giving away any traditional art (that I still have) that’s been used for the comics I’ve posted on here. So for example, say you want all the art from this comic 

than you’ll get all the traditional art(below) I made for it unless stated otherwise! 

~If You Want To Join Please Read These Guidelines~

- You HAVE to live in the USA! (this is b/c it’s basically free for me to send them this way)
- You Have to be fine w/ giving me Your Address (I will be mailing this out like I’d mail a letter to a friend in another state. I will not share your address with anyone and if you’re afraid I will than don’t join this giveaway)
- Only Reblogs Count (you don’t have to be following me but it’s appreciated)

Only 6 Random People will be getting art

- if you get picked you can only request all art from 1 Comic 

- All comic art is up for grabs unless stated otherwise

Giveaway Ends February 26

I’ll message the 6 lucky winners when it’s over ~ Good luck!

The Joker x Reader - “The Promise” Part 1

The Joker never saw it coming; he left his guard down for a moment and it all went to pieces. Nothing to hold on to now except his son and the memory of you. But maybe there is something else that won’t let him go either…

Read Part 2 here: http://diyunho.tumblr.com/post/164128124236/the-joker-x-reader-the-promise-part-2

“Would you like me to tell you where her body is?” the voice taunts as soon as The Joker answers his cell.

“You…you son of a bitch!! I’m gonna kill you!!” he gulps, his hand shaking on the phone.

“I don’t care, I had my revenge; that’s all I wanted. You took someone I loved away from me and it’s only fair I returned the favor,” the man replies. “Do you even care? Does it hurt you?… Does anything ever hurt you?”

“Shut the hell up!! Where is she?” J closes his eyes, panting.

“The new construction site on Nesley Avenue. Fourth floor. I left her eyes open: you’ll have the privilege of closing them forever. Be grateful: I wasn’t allowed the luxury of doing the same for my woman. I’m here too, waiting. Do your worst, I won’t stop you. I have nothing to live for now.”

The man hangs up and The Joker sits in the middle of the living room, still holding the cell to his ear. He can’t move, he can’t think. For the first time in his life he’s terrified – The King of Gotham knows his Queen is gone.

**************

The heavy steps resonate on the concrete hallway, the plastic curtains being moved aside as J is getting closer to his destination. He feels dizzy while squeezing the gun in his hand, petrified at the thought of what he knows he will certainly find in the building. Another plastic curtain gets moves out the way and The Joker freezes when he notices your body on the floor, only a few feet away.

He takes a deep breath, already incapable of keeping at bay the terrible pain scratching at his heart.

“Jesus…” he mutters to himself, slowly approaching. He sees your handcuffed wrists and ankles, the glossy eyes blankly staring at the ceiling. You seem so peaceful he hopes for a second you’re not dead. A fool’s hope; J knows it himself. He kneels by you, analyzing every single detail of your body, sniffling when he realizes you still have the ring. And The Joker is aware there’s someone behind him.

“I think you had a pretty woman, Clown. More than you deserved, that’s for sure,” the man softly laughs.

The Price of Crime growls, every single fiber in his body tense to the maximum.

“At least I didn’t take it on your kid, I’m not that low. I have to say it gave me great pleasure to do this to her. Revenge is always swee…”

The first gunshot hits the man’s chest. Then another one and another one echo in the stillness. J gets up, turns around and continues to aim at the collapsed man until there are no more bullets. His pupils are dilated, taken aback by today’s events.

The Joker can’t bring himself to gaze upon you again. He glares at your killer, numbness taking over. What is he supposed to do now?

**************

J wasn’t used to people smiling or look him in the eyes, especially not when they first met him. But you did just that. The other guys at the gathering tried to get your attention, asking a million questions and offering a great deal of money for your hacking services yet you caught yourself interested in the strange, green haired self-proclaimed King of Gotham.

You continued smiling and looking at him throughout the night; J found it annoying that he actually chuckled at one of your jokes. His fingers tightened on the cane numerous times, fighting with himself while checking you out. He didn’t want to but for some bizarre reason couldn’t help it.

The Joker remained stern, frowning for the rest of the evening, totally hating the fact that you stopped in front of him to say goodbye. You were the last one to leave the VIP room and you reached your hand for his, unaware he never shakes hands. Frost was behind his boss, getting ready to tell you how things work when the unthinkable happened: Mister J took your palm into his for just a second, snarling as you told him you’ll have the passwords he wanted first thing in the morning.

“Yeah, whatever. That works,” he bitterly replied, preoccupied by what was going on in the club.

He kept on needing your services and you kept on providing them. He even let you touch him when he came back from a heist with an ugly cut on his shoulder. Frost almost started his speech about how his boss doesn’t like to be touched when J willingly gave you his arm to be patched up. You sent Jonny for more supplies and carefully cleaned the wound in the meantime, gently blowing on top of it.

“Better?” you asked, soothing the pain and he bit on his cheek.

“Yeah.”

That’s all he said. Then you smiled. Why did you have to smile like that? Made him feel so odd. And you kept on looking at him, unable to resist those blue eyes. J didn’t see it coming when you leaned over and kissed him, quickly parting from his lips when you heard Frost outside the office. You weren’t sure what he was going to do.

The Joker didn’t do anything, pretending nothing happened. You couldn’t sleep all night, thinking about him and trying to get the stupid crush out of your mind. 

– It was almost dawn when you managed to doze off and the doorbell made you jump. You rubbed your eyes, tired as hell and barely made it to the door, ready to yell at the person that woke you up so early. As soon as you opened the door, J sneaked inside without a word. He stood in front of you, pointing towards his injury.

“Do you…need clean bandages?” you guessed, suddenly alert.

“U-hum,” he grumbled and after closing the door, you signaled him to follow you in the kitchen. You changed the dressing in perfect silence, then handed back his jacket and watched him head towards one of the bedrooms downstairs.

You followed him, curious about his behavior.

He stopped in front of the bed, waiting.

“Would you like to stay?” the question came and his answer made you happy.

“Yeah.”

*************

– You had so many fights and you would just disappear. The Joker always brought you back. The truth is you didn’t make it hard to be found. He knew it too.

“Let’s go,” J would urge, irritated he had to step on his pride again in order to go out there and search for the pain in the ass he couldn’t live without.

“I’m leaving you,” you had the nerve to reply sometimes. “I’m not coming back.”

“Interesting concept, Y/N,” and you stared at each other, you upset and him mad. As soon as you started to cry, he would grab your hand, dragging you after him. You didn’t fight it.

“O-one of these days I w-won’t come b-back,” you stuttered, bawling and wishing you were that strong.

“Save it for later, Doll. You will always come back.”

– Besides the fights, there were also good moments; you enjoyed them so much. Those instances made you remember why you loved him and why it was impossible to break free.

You two liked to stay in bed for hours, talking about stuff. All alone in the Penthouse and still covered your heads with the sheets, whispering. The Joker was addicted to the intimacy of your little world, secrets and thoughts no one knew about.

“If you leave, promise you’ll always come back,” he once found the strength to actually say it out loud.

“I can’t prom…” and the blue eyes got darker. “Fine, I promise,” you gave in and he tucked your hair behind your ear, pleased to hear it. Afterwards, he dug under his pillow and showed you that beautiful diamond ring he wanted you to have.

“Look what I found in the seif last night! Stealing from the mayor was the best idea ever; the guy is loaded.”

“Wowww, no kidding,” you gasped, amazed. You’ve seen a lot of diamond rings in your life but that was so unique and beautiful.

“I’ll give it to you for safe keeping, OK? I don’t trust all these assholes working for us,” The Joker sighted, slipping the jewel on your finger. He saw the emotions and had to mention:

“It’s not what you think, you crazy woman. I told you I just want you to take care of it, got it?”

“Yes,” you nodded, choosing to believe otherwise.

“You can keep it with one condition: promise you’ll never take it off,” The Joker surprised himself with the demand.

“I swear,” you were quick to vow, hugging him so tight he had to emerge from under the sheets to breathe better.

“I told you it’s not what you think, I wanna make it clear,” and you smiled through tears and he couldn’t say anything anymore.

Why did you have to smile like that?

– After your son was born, he became a regular member of your little club.

All three under the sheets, careful not to wake Kase up.

“You think we should keep him?” J used to tease, not being able to take his eyes off his baby boy.

“I think he’s a keeper,” you giggled, caressing the tiny tummy. “He will either look like you or like his real dad,” and you had to cover your mouth so you won’t laugh to loud.

“Cut it out!” J would reach over to slap your waist, grinding his silver teeth. ”Or do you hate me that much?”

You used to trap his hand until he calmed down.

“I don’t hate you,” and you got on your elbow and scooted closer to his body. “You gave me my son so I can’t hate you now.”  The statement made The Joker’s heart beat faster and he ignore it. The most he allowed himself to do was purr under your touch until he fell asleep.

– When things were bad, you would take Kase and try to leave. J would stop you before you made it to the elevator.

“Going anywhere?”

You were so exhausted from being a new mom plus dealing with your rocky relationship.

“I need to get out of here,” you tried to flee but he blocked your way.

“Then go, but my son stays!”

“I am not leaving without my baby,” you kept on attempting to walk towards the elevator and got frustrated when your plan failed.

“Then you stay too,” he would mumble, pinning you against the wall. “What is it? Can’t handle me anymore?” he used to mock, distressed.

Kase would fuss, not happy with the commotion.

“Gimme,” The Joker would take him in his arms, gesturing for your company. “Let’s go back to bed, I’m tired. Hey, where’s my smile, hm?” and you sulked even more. “ So I take it you only save that for his dad? Who’s the other guy?”

You would pass your fingers through your long hair, trying not to give him the satisfaction but finally smiled and he loved to win. But somehow it felt he was losing.

Why did you have to smile like that?

**************

He hears the little steps thumping on the hardwood floor and gets out of daze, lifting his head up to look at his 5 year old son holding his stuffed giraffe.

“Daddy, why are you crying?” Kase asks, frightened and his father signs for him to approach. The Joker is sitting on the floor and the little boy rushes in his arms, starting to sob, not understanding what’s going on.

“Your mom…” and his voice breaks, “…left me and she’s not coming back…Not this time…You’re stuck with me, kid.”

“Where’s mommy? I want my mommy,” the child keeps on repeating, sensing there is something wrong.

“She left…It’s just you and me now,” J mumbles, crushing his son with his embrace.

************

He said he stole that ring from the mayor’s mansion. The King of Gotham actually had it custom made for you and never told you. It always had just one owner: his Queen. Before he buried you, J took three diamonds out of your ring, one for each member of his family, and had them encased in his favorite ring. It’s the only jewelry he wears now. And the ring he gifted you was the only treasure in your coffin since you promised you’ll never take it off.

– “Hey, handsome.”

He feels the kiss on his cheek and opens his eyes as he mutters:

“Hey pretty girl.”

Another dream; he’s all alone in bed, groggy from the sleep medicine. J sighs, then shifts his head to peek at Kase who’s playing on the floor with a bunch of toys, not realizing his father is awake. The Joker gets under the covers, eager to share his thoughts but there is no one besides him. No one to tell.

“Kid, com’ere,” he makes a gap for his son to crawl in. The boy snickers and jumps in bed, glad he’s getting some attention. “Do you have any secrets to share with your dad?” J pecks his forehead, gazing in his son’s eyes.

“Ummm…I broke my truck,” he admits, familiar with the game he played so many times with his parents.

“Shame on you,” J scolds but caresses Kase’s face. “I’ll get you 10 more, ok?”

Ah, that smile. Just like yours.

“Ok, daddy,” and the child suddenly cuddles to J’s chest, wiggling. “Mommy says she loves you.”

The Prince of Crime gently spanks his kid, admonishing.

“I told you to quit talking like this! Don’t you listen?! Uhhhhh,” he growls, exasperated. The little boy keeps on saying random things like this since you died three months ago.

“But she gets mad at me if I don’t tell you,” and his lower lip quivers, on the verge of crying. “I don’t want mommy to be upset with me.”

“You’re such a brat! Stop tormenting me,” J squishes his son to his chest, not wanting to lose his temper.

“Mommy says that…”

“Shut up, would you??!!” he snaps and Kase is one step away from bawling.

“Mommy says that…”
“You’re pissing me off, what’s wrong with you??!!”  J cuts him off, really straining to keep it together.

“Mommy says she knows you made the ring for her!” his son blurs out and The Joker holds his breath, confused and stunned at the same time.

“W-what?” He’s finally at a loss of words.

Nobody knows about that.

Kase starts wailing and his father wants to calm him down.

“M-mommy says she doesn’t like it w-when you y-yell at me,” he whimpers, clenching to J’s t-shirt.

For once, the great Joker has no reply.

– Terrible storm outside; Gotham is on lockdown. Must be 2am or so.

“Daddy… daddy, I’m scared,” his son pulls on his arm, eager to get a reaction. J is such a heavy sleeper now since he takes sleeping pills all the time. Otherwise, he can’t rest.

“Go back to your room, it’s fine,” he grumbles, not in the mood for parenting.

The little one sniffles, really wanting to stay with his father.

“I want my mooommyyyyy,” and the crying immediately starts. The Joker blows his green hair off his face, irritated and moves towards the center of the bed, helping his son up. The little arms wrap around his neck and the small body shakes with anxiety.

“Daddddyyy, I’m scared.”

“Don’t be scared, I’m here,” J choses to take it down a notch and hugs his son back. It feels so comforting that Kase stops crying after a few minutes.

“Mommy says she loves you,” the muffled voice at his chest lets him know. “She always says that.”

“Cut it out, kid…”

“Huh?” his son turns his head to look behind him, just as he was listening to someone talking.

J pouts, forcing Kase’s head back to his chest.

“Stop your nonsense, brat!”

“Mommy says she promised you she’ll always come back.”

The Joker covers his mouth.

“SHUT …THE HELL UP!!!!!!” he screams so loud it resonates over the sound of thunder from the crazy tempest outside.

His 5 year old utters with teary eyes:

“Mommy says she doesn’t like it when you yell at me; she loves you less… But she can’t hate you.”

The King of Gotham bites on his lower lip, intrigued.

Nobody knows about that.

“Go to sleep and stop talking…” he remorsefully strokes his son’s cheek, not wanting to think about it. “Hey, would you give Daddy a smile?” he alleviates the tension, aware the poor kid has no fault in anything. “Let’s be friends again, yes?” The lighting illuminates the bedroom as The Joker lifts his son’s chin up and a shy smile flourishes on the child’s face.

Why does he have to smile like that?


Also read: MASTERLIST

http://diyunho.tumblr.com/post/153664676321/joker-x-reader-masterlist