so i found this dollar bill

||Strip Club|| The Pack Imagine

{Requested: No}

I wrote this while listening to a song called, “ I Luv This Shit” by August Alsina so if you’d like, you can listen to that while reading this.


(Reader’s P.O.V)

“(Y/N) this is the fifth pack meeting you miss.“Scott muttered, clearly upset.
“I know Scott, things just haven’t been easy lately."I said into my phone.
”(Y/N), if you need us or our help just tell us and we’ll be on our way-“
"No! I mean, no, I can take care of it. Sorry for missing the pack meeting again Scott, I’m truly sorry."I apologized as I parked my car in an almost full parking lot.
"It’s fine, hope things go better (Y/N)."Scott mumbled before hanging up.
I sighed before shoving my phone into my purse. I hopped out of my car and raced into back of the building where all the employees entered. I was greeted by a lot of kind smiles and waves. I immediately made a beeline for my dressing room and sat on my chair. Looking at the lit up mirror in front of me I sighed. Since my makeup had already been done, I only had to put a wig on and a red masquerade mask. I stripped myself off my comfortable clothes and put my red strapped bra that looked almost like a harness for my boobs. I then put on my red strapped thong before putting on my black sheer robe.
"Sorry Scott."I muttered as I put my red fishnet stockings and red high heels.
I really wished I could be with the pack instead of here.
(Liam’s P.O.V)
"I for one think we should leave her alone, I trust (Y/N)."Lydia spoke up.
"Lydia everyone trusted Theo and he tried to tear the pack apart-”
“I’m right here Stiles."Theo reminded him.
"I can see that Theo, I’m not blind."Stiles answered, rolling his eyes.
"You didn’t trust Theo but you do trust (Y/N)."Malia reminded him.
"Okay but I trust her but I don’t believe that she’s dealing with something that makes her miss like five pack meetings."Stiles explained.
"Well I believe (Y/N), she’s never given me a reason not to."I spoke up.
"Of course you do Liam, you have a crush on her-”
“So does Theo-”
“Do not."Theo growled, glaring at me.
"So does Scott."I blurted out.
"Liam do you just assume everyone has a crush on her because you do?"Scott asked me.
"You said she was gorgeous-”
“Okay she’s extremely good looking but that doesn’t mean I like her-”
“Scott of course you like her, everyone in this room does. I bet Malia even likes her!"Stiles yelled.
"Yeah I like (Y/N), she’s cool."Malia shrugged.
"I don’t think she likes her the way we do-”
“You mean you do."Theo argued.
"Okay guys can we stop arguing over this? We get it, (Y/N)’s hot but is she telling us the truth?"Stiles said.
"I say we find out where she is when she’s not at our pack meetings."Stiles suggested.
"I think it’s a good plan."Malia mumbled.
"Guys, (Y/N) said she could handle it."Lydia objected.
I pulled out my phone and went on Snapchat, surely I could find her with the new snap map feature.
"I’m down, this pack meeting is boring."Theo spoke up.
"Who invited you again?"Stiles asked, making Theo shoot him a glare.
"She’s at a strip club."I blurted out loud.
"What, how do you know?"Stiles asked.
"Snapchat, the new snap map feature shows that she’s at a strip club."I answered.
"She said she was dealing with something?"Scott muttered, confused.
"Obviously she’s dealing with some hormonal issues, she’s probably at the male strip club-”
“Actually it’s a stripper with female performers."I said, watching the snapchats from people at the strip club.
"To the jeep!"Stiles yelled.
We all groaned before entering Stiles jeep, everyone but Lydia. She insisted on leaving (Y/N) alone because she believed (Y/N) a good reason to be at a strip club. Stiles scoffed and told her that she was blinded by love for her friend. Stiles raced to the strip club and I wasn’t even sure if it was because he wanted to prove himself right or see strippers. We parked near the strip club and walked over to the front entrance.
"I.D please."The two security guards said as we tried entering.
"Oh yeah… dammit I think I might have left mine in my jacket at home."Stiles muttered, patting his pants.
"Huh, nice try kid-”
“Oh for gods sake."Malia muttered before her and Theo quickly knocked out the bodyguards.
"Now lets go in."Malia said as she walked in.
We all followed after her, the building was full of intoxicated men. The music was blasting through the huge stereo system while the dimly lit stage was empty.
"Now to find (Y/N)!"Stiles yelled over the blaring music.
"Malia, you go to-Malia?"Stiles asked as we realized she had disappeared into the crowd.
We all looked around until we spotted her at the bar where she was already drinking.
"Lia, I thought we went over this! We can’t get drunk!"Scott yelled as he pushed past the crowd to get to Malia.
"Okay since they’re gone, we’ll-Theo?"Stiles asked as Theo looked at one stripper who was walking in his direction.
"No, no, no. We’re here to find (Y/N), not get distracted."Stiles spat, pulling Theo closer to us.
"Even if the girls here are gorgeous…"Stiles whispered, gazing at another stripper who passed by.
"Stiles!"I yelled, snapping him out of his trance.
"Remember (Y/N), you know the only reason why we’re here?"I asked.
"Right, (Y/N)."Stiles mumbled.
Suddenly the lights on the stage started to shine brightly as they moved to the center of the stage. A girl with a black sheer robe, red stockings, red high heels, and a red masquerade mask walked out. She seductively removed her robe which made everyone in the room whistle at her. The girl swayed her hips to the beat of the music so perfectly I felt myself harden. No Liam, you can’t get hard over a random girl. I looked at Stiles and Theo who were watching her hungrily. She made her way to the pole and started grinding on the pole. Out of the corner of my eye I could see a guy in the back corner jacking off in the dark. I gagged at the guy before looking back at the girl. She climbed up the pole and wrapped her legs around the top of the pole as soon as she got there. She let go of the pole with her hands and let her head and body hang. The guys in the front row were throwing a bunch of money when suddenly I spotted Malia sneakingly grabbing the bills as Scott stared up at the girl on stage. Malia grinned as the girl slid slowly down the pole, making her throw a few of the bills at the girl. Malia was also enjoying the show. The girl arched her back against the pole before sliding down on it again. She grabbed the pole with one hand as she took a step in the other direction before she began to spin on the pole. I looked over to see Stiles already throwing dollar bills at the girl.
"So much for finding (Y/N).’‘I muttered.
I turned to find Theo but instead found him near Stiles also throwing dollar bills, most likely being Stiles money. The girl’s mouth fell open as she looked at Stiles and Theo. She seemed tense for a few seconds as she looked through the crowd, she found Scott and Malia and finally her eyes landed on me. She seemed to be extremely tense now. I gave her a thumbs up, hoping it would make her less tense. I didn’t know why she was tense in the first place but I didn’t mind. She smiled at me before continuing to dance. She started twerking in front of Scott, making Scott and Malia throw bills at her. Malia was screaming with delight, clearly enjoying herself. She looked over at Stiles who seemed upset since he had thrown all his money, not thinking clearly. She smirked before walking over to him. She held out her hand to him, making Stiles’ eyes widen. She pulled him up and dragged him to a chair that had a rope dangling above the chair. She spread Stiles legs apart and sat down on him, grinding onto him as she grabbed his hands and placed them on her ass. Stiles face was filled with pure bliss. The crowd was crazy now. The girl proceeded to give him a lap dance which made a huge bulge appear in Stiles pants. I looked down at mine and instantly covered it. As soon as she finished with Stiles lap dance, she pulled on the rope which dropped water onto them. She grabbed his face and gave him a rough kiss as Stiles squeezed her ass. She guided Stiles back to the crowd before she proceeded to dance seductively. She dropped to her knees and flipped her hair side to side before leaning back, giving the crowd a breathtaking view of her red thong. She leaned back up and slid to over so we could now she her side. She proceeded to grind on the floor before letting her hands roam her body. She stopped after a few seconds and reached behind her back. Suddenly her bra was loose, everyone screamed and whistled, making her smirk. She stood back up, slowly starting to take it off when the lights shut off out of nowhere.
"Give it up for Rose!"I heard someone yell.
A roar of clapping and whistling made me cover my sensitive ears. Out of the corner of my eyes I see Rose walk through the crowd when suddenly Theo called her over. I never noticed when Theo had decided to the coach right next to me. Rose smiled and walked over to him.
"How much for a lap dance?"He asked as he grabbed his wallet.
"20 dollars handsome."She answered, running her hands down his biceps.
Theo grinned up at her, handing her a 20 dollar bill. She winked at him before taking the money from him and stuffing it in her bra. She straddled his lap and began grinding on him. She leaned towards him, his face in her breast as she softly bit his ear. She began to leave a trail of soft wet kisses on his neck all the way down to his chest. Theo let a moan leave his lips as she grinded rougher into him. Theo was surprised when she pressed her lips against his, but he quickly kissed back. I could see their tongues going into each other’s mouths.
"I don’t think this is a lap dance kitten."Theo whispered as they pulled apart.
"Well sorry I couldn’t help myself, you’re insanely good looking."She whispered, making Theo smirk.
"So you want the lap dance instead of this?"She asked.
"No, no, I think I like this better."Theo answered, his hands finding her ass.
She grinned down at him before she continued. I swear I was throbbing now.
"Any sign of (Y/N)?"Stiles asked as he walked over to me.
"No not yet- Jesus Stiles cover your bulge."I muttered.
"Why don’t you cover yours!"Stiles yelled, making me cover mine.
Stiles and I looked around but couldn’t seem to find her. After what seemed like an eternity, we went back tot he pack. We found Rose sitting on Scott’s lap as Scott kissed her neck.
"I thought strippers weren’t allowed to be touched?"Scott asked Rose.
"We only let a few people if we want them to touch us."She answered.
Scott smirked before his hand found cupped one of her boobs. They started to make out roughly which made me feel slightly jealous.
"Liam you have to get a lap dance, she gave me and Scott one and it was amazing!"Malia yelled, grinning widely.
"Uh I didn’t bring money-”
“Here!"Malia said, shoving a 20 dollar bill in my face.
"I’ve got a lot of money now, people kept throwing it at the stage so I figured I’d keep it if they didn’t want it."Malia explained.
I shook my head, laughing at her. I watched as Rose pulled away from Scott, both breathing heavily.
"God you’re so hot."Scott growled.
"Uh Rose,could I um…. could I-”
“Rose give this boy the ride of his life!"Malia yelled as she pulled her off of Scott and sat her onto of me.
"Well aren’t you a snack."She whispered as she admired me.
"Your voice sounds so familiar."I said, making her eyes widen.
"I get that a lot."She muttered.
She ran her hands down my chest and started to leave a hickey on my neck. I tensed up, hoping she wouldn’t realize how quickly my neck would heal. She grabbed my hands and made me squeeze her ass.
"What do you want baby?"She asked.
I was about to answer but instead I smashed my lips against hers. She started to grind on me as she kissed back. I moaned into the steamy kiss.
"God Liam…"She whispered when we pulled apart.
The way my name left her red rosy lips, my eyes widened. I quickly removed her masquerade mask off.
”(Y/N)?“I asked in disbelief.
"Hi Liam…"She mumbled, grinning shyly.
Scott, Stiles, Malia, and Theo’s jaws dropped.
”(Y/N)?“They asked.
"Hi guys…"She whispered, turning to face them.
I wrapped my arms around her which made her heartbeat slow down.
"That’s why we couldn’t find you!"Stiles yelled.
"You tried finding me?”(Y/N) asked.
“Stiles wanted to prove he was right that you might be lying to us which I think he might be right about."Theo answered, staring at (Y/N) with lust filled eyes.
I looked at everyone and noticed their eyes were filled with lust too.
"I didn’t think you were dealing with something so bad that it would make you miss pack meetings-”
“Actually my parents got fired and can’t seem to find any jobs right now. I got this job so I can help them pay bills and rent."She spoke up.
"So you were wrong Stiles."I said, making Stiles glare at me.
"That’s why I’ve been spending almost every night here.”(Y/N) stated.
“Also Liam, move your phone-”(Y/N) started to say but stopped as she realized I had my phone in my hands.
“Oh."She whispered.
"When’s your shift over?’'Scott asked.
"Uh 11:30-”
“It’s 12:32."I said.
"Well I’m off now."She shrugged.
"Well there’s still a pack meeting you need to come to."Stiles spoke up.
"I guess we better get going.”(Y/N) said getting up from my lap.
After a few minutes, (Y/N) walked back to us. She was now in clothes most girls would use to run.
“Alright let’s go.”
(Y/N)’s P.O.V)
“Wow my mom’s still not home."Scott muttered as we walked into his house.
Our eyes landed on Lydia who was watching a movie.
"Oh hey (Y/N)."She greeted, smiling.
I greeted her back and threw myself at the couch. Liam and Theo raced to the couch, both sitting next to me.
"So did you figure out why she was not at our pack meetings?"Lydia asked.
"Oh yeah, yeah, she’s dealing with money issues."Stiles mumbled, trying not to give my secret away.
”(Y/N)’s a stripper.“Malia blurted out, plopping down next to Lydia.
Lydia’s eyes widened as she turned to me.
"Are you the strippers who sleep with clients?"Lydia asked.
"No, I’m a stripper not a prostitute-”
“Then why do you have hickeys on your neck?"She asked.
We all turned to look at Scott who looked like a deer caught in headlights.
"Hey mom!"Scott yelled nervously as the door opened.
"Hey- Jesus Christ (Y/N) what the hell happened to your neck?"Melissa asked, bewildered.
"Uhhh-”
“(Y/N)’s a stripper!"Malia yelled, munching on popcorn.
"Oh and Scott was so close to having sex with her but she’s a stripper so she can’t-”
“Lia!"Scott shrieked, covering her mouth.
"You know what, I had a long day at work and I really don’t want to deal with whatever is going on right now so just please keep it down."Melissa muttered as walked past us.
We all looked at each other awkwardly before Malia had enough of the silence.
”(Y/N)’s a stripper named Rose!“Malia yelled, happily.
"Malia!"We all yelled at her.
"I said keep it down!"Melissa screamed.
"Malia that’s something you can’t tell the whole world about-”
“What’s wrong with being a stripper?"Malia asked.
"Nothing it’s just-”
“Malia just be quiet so we don’t make Melissa kick us out."Lydia snapped.
Suddenly the tv started blaring a loud screeching noise.
"That’s it!"Melissa screamed.
Scott jumped of his feet and yelled for us to run.
"Why?"Liam asked as I held onto him.
"That’s why!"Scot yelled as he pointed at Melissa.
Melissa appeared at the bottom of the stairs with a steel metal bat.
"Save the stripper!"Malia yelled as she picked me up and ran with me outside.- Thank you for taking time out of your day to read this, I hope you enjoyed it! Have a wonderful day/night!

Cherry Bomb (Taeyong x Reader)

Rating: M

(A/N) OOPS! I DID IT AGAIN!!!! I GAVE YOU A SMUT, I WROTE ANOTHER ONE…OH BABY, BABY! Anyway, here’s some yummy retro Taeyong smutty goodness. A little short and sweet, but definitely gets its point across if you know what mean :^)))))))))) Enjoy!

Originally posted by jonqins

It felt weird walking into an arcade, having not visited one since when you were younger. The welcoming sounds of heavily synthesized music, trigger clicks, and the smacking of big plastic buttons brought back a wave of nostalgia and made you smile as you peered over the shoulders of people playing. There were no kids in sight though, just people around your age who laughed and joked, drank, reminiscing in their childhood. You’d been coerced into going to a twenty one and older event at the local vintage arcade that had just opened down the street from your apartment. People were going bananas of the shiny restored arcade machines, vintage interior, and nostalgic music.

Keep reading

Full Disclosure

destiel, PG-13, 3.7k

This fic was inspired by the following prompt I received from @imsounoplogetic:
So I recently came across this video. And me being the trash that I am, I immediately though of destiel. I was wondering if you could write something base off of this video where Dean is popular kid who Cas thinks is a jerk. Cas is a theatre boy and Cas comes by the rehearsal room and hears Dean singing and is completely shocked?

Thanks to @captainhaterade for their beta work!

AO3 link

Summary: Dean’s the popular kid, and Castiel’s the drama kid who holds a grudge against him due to an incident on his first day of school. They’ve stayed out of each other’s way ever since, until one night Castiel stumbles upon something completely unexpected in the drama room… 


“Cas? Did you actually hear a word I just said or are you too busy checking out Winchester’s ass?”

Ash’s typical laid-back drawl cut through Castiel thoughts, and he turned to the long-haired boy with a scowl.

“I was not looking at Dean’s ass,” he said, though it sounded more petulant than aggressive.

“Sure you weren’t.” Ash’s raised eyebrows were a pretty good clue that he didn’t believe Castiel at all. “So what did I say, then?” he challenged.

“You were talking about…” Castiel frantically cast his mind back to the last two minutes. Okay, so he had perhaps been looking at Dean. But certainly not at his ass. Not that there was much to look at (or so Castiel had convinced himself). His face, now there was a work of art. Especially those freckles that dusted his nose and cheeks and –

Castiel forcefully cut off that train of thought. Freckles or no freckles, Dean Winchester was a jerk. One of the popular, “cool” kids who looked down on Castiel and his nerdy, geeky friends. He was good at sports, got above average grades (to Castiel’s annoyance) and had a line around the block of boys and girls wanting to date him. Naturally, he only dated the prettiest people, and his circle of friends were similarly aesthetically blessed.

Of course, those things alone would not merit the descriptor “jerk”. Dean’s attitude towards Castiel, however, did. Castiel had transferred to Lawrence High at the start of his senior year, and he’d met Dean on his second day of school, in front of the classroom where Mr. Thompson’s English class was about to start. Dean had been chatting to one of his friends (Castiel would later find out that her name was Bella) and was blocking the doorway.

“Excuse me,” Castiel had said politely, meeting Dean’s ridiculously green eyes. Dean had given him a once-over, making Castiel feel like he was on display in a zoo, before grabbing Bella by the arm and pulling her towards him so Castiel could pass by.

“Sorry, dude,” Dean had said, frowning and looking troubled. Castiel had stepped into the classroom without another word, but he could hear Bella giggling and whispering something to Dean, to which Dean had responded with a derisive snort and a “he’s all yours – not interested.”

Castiel had felt humiliated, and ever since he’d avoided Dean like the plague, scowling at him whenever their eyes met, which usually had the effect of Dean looking down with a tight, unhappy expression. Dean was a shallow jerk, plain and simple, and Castiel wanted nothing to do with him.

The only good thing about him was that he was a member of the school’s LGBT+ Alliance, which was headed by Charlie Bradbury who was also their only mutual friend. But Castiel had always taken care to stay away from Dean during those meetings, and had sometimes avoided them altogether if he knew Dean would be coming. It exasperated Charlie to no end, as she was convinced they’d be great friends if they would only talk to each other and give it a chance.

But she was wrong – they were too different. Getting closer to Dean would only lead to disappointment. It wasn’t worth trying.

“About what, Cas?”

Oh, right, his conversation with Ash. Damn, Castiel really needed to sleep more – he was having a hell of time concentrating lately.

“About who we could cast to replace Bradley as Mal,” Castiel said confidently. He hadn’t been that zoned out, thankfully, and remembered just enough to answer Ash’s question about The Addams Family musical performance the drama club was holding at the end of the year.

Ash regarded him suspiciously for a moment, but then shrugged and let it go. “Yep, so me and Jo were thinkin’ maybe Garth could do it?”

Castiel considered it. “Maybe. But I’m not sure his singing voice is strong enough to carry Mal’s solo songs. Besides, didn’t he say he’d rather work behind the scenes? Last I heard he was helping with lighting and sound. Don’t we have any other candidates?”

“Not really – everyone else either already has a part or is helping out backstage. Yeah, Garth was assisting Kelly but she can probably do it on her own. I don’t see how we got much of a choice. We ain’t got much time left.”

True enough, they couldn’t afford to wait much longer to decide on a replacement for Mal’s part. Why did Bradley’s family have to take him skiing, anyway? Such a dangerous, expensive and completely pointless sport.

Castiel wondered if Dean skied.

Standing up with his now empty lunch tray, Castiel nodded at Ash. “I see your point. I’ll go mention it to Jody and Donna, then. See what they think.”

Ash waved his hand in a lazy salute. “Thanks man, ‘ppreciate it. Oh, and Cas?”

Castiel turned back around.

“You really should give Dean another chance. I know you guys got off on the wrong foot, and I don’t blame you for that, but he really ain’t all that bad once you get to know him.”

“And since when do you hang out with Dean Winchester?” Castiel asked, feeling betrayed. He’d had no idea Ash was even on speaking terms with Dean.

“Since he gave me a ride home in that beautiful car of his ‘bout a month ago when I was stranded here after my sis bailed on me. We got to talking after.” Ash waggled his eyebrows at Castiel. “He really isn’t just a pretty face, y’know. And don’t pretend you don’t think he’s pretty. You’re a terrible liar.”

“So what? The guy’s an arrogant jerk - his looks mean nothing to me. He basically gave me the Darcy treatment on my second day of school, Ash. Before he even knew me! As if I was even interested in him!”

“Yeah and we all know how that story ends, don’t we?” Ash was grinning now. “Look, I ain’t gonna deny that was a dick move, but from what I’ve learned about the guy, he tends to put his foot in it when he’s flustered.” He looked at Castiel pointedly. “Maybe something about you just throws him off his game?”

Castiel had had about enough of this conversation. The memory of their first meeting always left him feeling hollow and in a foul mood, and he needed to keep his spirits up to survive ethics class with Mr. Adler later this afternoon.

“Whatever it is, I’m not interested in finding out. I doubt I’m missing out on much. I’ll see you at rehearsal, Ash.” He walked away before Ash could say anything else.

Keep reading

SHIT JUST WENT UP SHIT CREEK

I was working on commissions this morning and i was just about to stream when my internet shut off. I didnt think much about it at the time but when i went downstairs, I FOUND OUT THAT MY UNCLES DOG BIT THROUGH MY WIRE AND TOOK A FOOT OFF THE FUCKING LAN CONNECTING ME TO THE INTERNET!!!

Soooo i need to go out and buy a new one, BUT i also need to pay my phone bill!! So all together the goal of what i need is around around 90 dollars (i also need around 10 more dollars to help pay for my rent, so all in all my final goal is 100$)

If any of you could help me reach my goal it could be VERY appriciated!!

If i dont get my phone paid it will go off on the 1st and i need that to be able to look for more jobs in the area.

So please, please, PLEASE think about getting a commission or if you cant PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE, REBLOG THIS POST SO OTHERS CAN SEE IT!!

Im in desperate need of help with this because i was kicked out of my old house and a job is NOT easy to find where im at.

So PLEASE, im BEGGING you to help me reach my goal.

Thank you


signs as lorde songs
  • aries: yellow flicker beat
  • "my blood is a flood of rubies, precious stones. it keeps my veins hot. the fire's found a home in me."
  • taurus: ribs
  • "this dream isn't feeling sweet. we're reeling through the midnight streets, and I've never felt more alone. feels so scary getting old"
  • gemini: million dollar bills
  • "there's nothing I want but money and time. million dollar bills and a tick tick tick tick."
  • cancer: the love club
  • "i'm sitting pretty on the throne. there's nothing more I want, except to be alone."
  • leo: 400 lux
  • "we're never done with killing time. can I kill it with you 'til the veins run red and blue?"
  • virgo: a world alone
  • "all my fake friends and all of their noise complain about work. they're studying business, i study the floor."
  • libra: royals
  • "but every song's like gold teeth, grey goose, trippin' in the bathroom, blood stains, ball gowns, trashin' the hotel room. we don't care. we're driving cadillacs in our dreams."
  • scorpio: swingin' party
  • "if being afraid is a crime, we hang side by side at the swingin' party down the line."
  • sagittarius: tennis court
  • "don't you think that it's boring how people talk? making smart with their words again, well I'm bored."
  • capricorn: bravado
  • "'cause I was raised up to be admired, to be noticed."
  • aquarius: white teeth teens
  • "i'll let you in on something big. i am not a white teeth teen. i tried to join but never did."
  • pisces: buzzcut season
  • "the men up on the news, they try to tell us all that we will lose."

My step dad, who has been upper middle class his whole life, and has no concept of poverty, is like “ah. I see you are making a whopping ten (10) dollars an hour. You are completely self sustainable now. Here are all of the bills for you to pay, which you should be able to pay, because you have a job”. While my mother on the other hand, who (like myself) has spent most of her life in poverty (and also has a soul) has to literally sneak me money so I can afford to eat while if my step dad found out would be extremely pissed because “ah yes. Ten dollars an hour. Sustainable living.”

anonymous asked:

❛okay, but, consider this: i don’t care. i’m gonna do it.❜ + kyoya ? :-)

I hope you like how it turned out! I’m not sure where this idea came from, but Free Donut Day is a real holiday (at least where I live).
~~~~~
“Y/N, you’re not serious, are you?” Kyoya’s voice said, through the phone you’re currently holding to your ear as you rummage through your desk to see if you had any money stashed away.
“I have literally never been this serious in my entire life.” you respond.
You hear Kyoya sigh. “No.”
You pause. “…no?”
Today was Free Donut Day. Basically all that meant was that everyone got one free donut, and any other donut for only fifty cents. So what were you gonna do?
Stock up on some donuts, that’s what you were gonna do.
However, your plan to buy at least two hundred donuts was now becoming slightly more difficult to execute.
“Y/N.” Kyoya sighed again. “This is a terrible idea.”
“No it’s not.” you said, smiling as you found a ten dollar bill hidden in your desk. “Give me one good reason not to go through with this.”
“Alright.” Kyoya thought for no more than a second before he had his answer. “It’s a waste of money. You won’t eat all those donuts before they expire. The store will be crowded. You won’t be able to get that many donuts to your house - not in one piece, at least. And even if you did, where would you keep that many donuts?”
You stop looking through your desk, and sit down in your desk chair. You don’t really have an argument for that.
A couple more seconds go by before you come up with a response.
“Okay, but, consider this: I don’t care. I’m gonna do it.”
You grab your wallet and start walking out of your room.
Kyoya groans. “Alright, fine. But don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
You smile. “I won’t!”

I NEED FINANCIAL HELP WHILE LOOKING FOR A JOB

Hey everyone, here’s the situation:

I thought I had a job lined up for me when I got out of school, and it was the same position that I had last summer. However, this wasn’t the case anymore BECAUSE they aren’t hiring anyone, and have no plans to open any positions anytime soon, which sucks for me, because I was promised a position after I left that job last year to pursue my 4th and final year in University.

It’s going to be hard trying to find a job in my area because I have lots of experience and qualifications as a manager, and unfortunately, there’s absolutely no positions open for that anywhere, and that’s not the position I’m looking for because there’s too much stress and time consuming work involved in being a manager, BUT THANKS TO THAT, many institutions won’t hire me to just be a clerk or a cashier, because I’m:

“OVER-QUALIFIED” – the stupidest word in the employment business.

It’s now May, I have rent and bills that need to be paid this month, and I still haven’t found a job yet thanks to the mix up I mentioned above, so I need help finding the funds while searching for someplace to work in the meantime.

This is a Donation Drive callout. If anyone reading this wants to help out, even if it’s just a dollar, please donate to my paypal address here:

ecsd@shaw.ca

ecsd@shaw.ca

ecsd@shaw.ca

The total amount that I’ll need for the end of the month: Approx. $2000.00

All proceeds will go towards: Rent, Phone bills (this month’s and next month’s), Health Insurance, groceries, emergency funds, and bus pass (min. $100). Hopefully there will be some left over for next month’s bills in case I can’t find a job by then.

I still make peanuts on YouTube, I’m not Full-Time there yet and I probably won’t be for a few more years. I’ll work on getting a Patreon page up for all of you if that helps, but I know right now, I need the help.

With donating, I’ll repay by doing the best I can with my YouTube channel and find the job I need that will cover all of the outstanding fees I need paid off.

TL;DR - My last job screwed me over for a guaranteed position, I’m unemployed, apparently “Over-Qualified” for anything less then a Manager’s position that would be unhealthy for me, looking for work and need help with finances. Even $1 will help if you can spare it, or reblog this for others to see.

Thank you,

C.R.~<3

Over And Over Again

Natasha Romanoff x reader

For once, the everything plays out in your favour as Nat comes to rescue you from you abusive boyfriend. [~3200 words]

written for this prompt: “Would you be willing to write one where Natasha likes the reader. She works at the coffee shop Nat visits all the time. The reader starts showing up to work with bruises here and there and it tired all the time. Nat being the spy she is looks into it and finds out she’s being abused by her bf. Nat kicks his ass and moves the reader in with her at the tower.” by anonymous

warnings: language, violence, domestic abuse, mentions of blood and injury

A/N: I’m so sorry this took me so long to write! I lost inspiration for the story ages ago and somehow it found me again just no so that I could finally finish it. Sadly, it was anonymously requested so I don’t know if this will ever reach you but I really hope it does and you like it!

Originally posted by anotherscarlettblog

You forced a smile and handed yet another to-go cup of coffee over the counter. Only three hours left until your shift ended. How you were going to manage those without falling asleep on the spot and thus losing you job, you had no idea. But it was definitely better than being at home. Tonight was Wednesday which meant his friends were going to be over. Awesome.

Maybe you would get the chance to spend a bit more time than usual closing the shop. It seemed to be happening more often these days.

Your thoughts were fortunately interrupted by another customer stepping up to the counter and this routine, you had gotten so very familiar with it over the past years, repeated itself mercilessly.

But today would be better because, in the corner of your eye, you saw Natasha pulling open the door of the café. She conjured a smile to your face – a real on this time – with the way she walked towards you.

“Hey, Nat,” you found yourself saying, “The usual?”

She propped her elbow up on the counter. “Oh, Y/N. You know me so well,” she sighed exaggeratedly, handing you the money.

“Well, you are one of my favorite customers.” You pulled out her change without having to look at the register, you knew the amount by heart as she always gave you a ten dollar bill.

“One of your favorite or your favorite?” The smirk on her lips did something to your insides you hadn’t felt in ages. “Choose wisely, Y/N. You know I’m an assassin.”

“Should I be scared now?”, you asked mockingly as you finished her order. There was no one else in line so you took a bit more time to speak with her. You really felt as if you had gotten something like friends over time and you found yourself wanting to not lose that connection. After writing her name as beautifully as could on the round cup with a little flower next to it, you handed her her order. “You know, I know I shouldn’t be this jealous but how on earth does one look like you do and drink their coffee with, like, half of the cup filled with whipped cream? It’s ridiculous.”

“Punching bad guys all day long really pays off then.” She slowly turned on her heels to leave. “And you have nothing to be jealous of, you’re gorgeous as hell.”

You were glad that she had mostly her back in your direction so she couldn’t really see the blush that crept up your cheeks but then she suddenly turned around again. “Hey, Y/N. Would you like to go out with me sometime? Like, on a date?”

You would have loved to say yes, you really would, but there was still Ryan. “I’m sorry, I have a boyfriend.”

Natasha’s smile fell slightly but she recovered quickly. “Well, then. I’ll see you later.” And with that, she was gone and another customer stepped in, bringing a stop to the small pause in your schedule Natasha always brought with her.


As planned, you took more time closing the shop tonight. You needed a breather before you had to go home eventually.

Natasha’s proposal for a date was still partially occupying your thoughts and you wondered what it was about you that had made her like you. Or maybe she didn’t. After all, she could have anyone and probably that was just what you were to her. A flirt, anyone. There was nothing special about you really, you thought and sighed as you made your way to your flat.

Ryan was already waiting for you. Well, awaiting you, as he was immediately in front of you to after you opened the door. “Where the hell have you been?”, he spat, “You’re ten minutes late. You were supposed to cook. The boys are already here.”

“I’m sorry,” you said lowly, making yourself look smaller as your crouched in on yourself. “It took a bit longer at work, there was this-“

“I don’t care about your excuses! Jesus, what are you even good for? I should get rid of you.” His voice grew louder with every word that he spat out. “Come on.” He grabbed you harshly by your upper arm. “Hurry or you will regret it.”

You nodded frantically, letting yourself get dragged towards the kitchen. Ryan’s grip on your wrist was painful and, by experience, going to bruise.

As fast as you could, you whipped up something quick and simple; you knew that, as long as the taste was decent, you wouldn’t get punished, or at least not too much.

Having learnt to the hard way, you placed a generously filled plate in front of each of the men. They did not like having to fill their plates themselves and, as much as you hated it, it was smarter to just oblige.

The last one gave you a hard smack on your ass and you breathed in deeply to contain your calm. This night did not need to escalate.


And it didn’t, luckily. You ignored the disgusting things they said about you and tried to keep them from getting to your head. All the names they called you, you were none of that. You are good. That what you told the person in the mirror as you washed your hands during one of the toilet breaks you got. You can do this.


The next morning was rather uneventful. You woke up, ate breakfast on your own, as Ryan was not going to get out of bed until at least mid day, and made your way to work. You were the only one in your relationship to have a job so you had to. Or else you wouldn’t have a roof over your head.

Lunch time at the café was, as usual, quiet and you busied yourself with sorting the different things one could put into their beverage by color, size, and then alphabetically. That didn’t kill too much time but at least the bell at the front door went off the moment you started to think again.

“Hello again.” Natasha smiled at you just like she did every time you saw her and you suddenly wondered if eyes were supposed to shine this brightly. With a soft calling of your name, she shook you out of your thoughts.

“Oh, yeah, sorry. The usual?” Contrary to what you always witnessed with Natasha, your smile didn’t reach your eyes.

A slight frown appeared on her face. “Yes, thanks. Everything okay?”

“Yeah, it’s a bit quiet today, especially for a Friday.” You turned around to prepare the order.

“I meant with you, not the café.”

“Oh. I just didn’t sleep well last night.” Your brain quickly came up a lie. “The neighbors just couldn’t shut up and the walls in my building are basically paper.” Neither of you laughed, although you had intended it to be a joke.

Natasha smiled at you, though. “Next time call me. I’ll make them stop.”

As you carefully put the lid on the to-go cup, you said, “I’m not sure you’re gonna manage that. They’re pretty much not bothered by anything at all.”

“Y/N, you forget that I am an Avenger,” she said, accepting the coffee you handed to her. By chance, her eyes found the bit of skin at your wrist where, as you had expected, a dark bruise had bloomed.

With lightning speed, your fingers moved to pull the sleeve of your shirt over it but it was too late. Natasha had already seen.

“What’s that?” Her gaze was practically boring into your soul and you felt yourself slightly shrink under it.

You opened your mouth to blurt out a response, another lie, but luckily, Natasha’s phone started to ring at that exact moment.

Sighing, she accepted the call and within a few seconds, she disappeared through the door with a hushed, “We’re not finished here. I’ll see you later.”


‘Later’, apparently, was very much later because Natasha didn’t come back for a good week. By that time, your situation with Ryan had reached another high. There were bruises all over your body that your cheap concealer had problems covering up properly and you felt like you hadn’t slept in a month.

As it was the middle of summer, it was way too warm to wear long sleeved shirts but you had no choice as you couldn’t let your bruises be seen by anyone.

That day, Nat walked in around five wearing gym shorts and a sports bra and you were so jealous as you felt a drop of sweat roll down your back. This heat was going to be the death of you.

“Hi,” she breathed smiling. Noticing that she was slightly sweaty as well, you figured that she had probably been working out before she came in.

“Hi, haven’t seen you in a while,” you joked. “The usual?”

“Not this time. I want something cold, something really cold.” With the back of her hand, she wiped away a bit of sweat off her forehead, before her hands moved up to redo her pony tail. “What can you recommend?”

“Um, we’ve got a shake thing with raspberries that I like in summer. It’s mostly ice water and raspberries but it’s good. Doesn’t have any sugar and the berries are fresh.”

“Yeah, I’ll take that. Thanks.”

You turned around to get to work and heard Natasha behind you gasp loudly. Instant fear that maybe your shirt had ridden up a bit to reveal your bruises made itself prominent but was replaced by relief when she spoke, “How are you not dying in the heat with those long sleeves?”

“Oh,” you said, turning back around, “I don’t mind. I get cold very easily. And we have air conditioning.”

Natasha slightly tilted her head as if she didn’t fully believe you. “If you say so. But maybe I’m just hot from my run.” And she really was hot, there was no denying that but you didn’t want to look at her because looking at her made you feel things you had long forgotten and you were scared. What if Ryan found out? At the same time, you couldn’t help but stare at her backside with her defined shoulders and tones thighs that you could see for the first time in those shorts she wore when she left the café again, raspberry shake in hand.


“F.R.I.D.A.Y.” Nat spoke up as she was sitting in one of the lounge chairs in the living room, “Can you look someone up for me?”


You couldn’t sleep. Both the pain and the decision whether to go to the hospital or not were keeping you up. Your eyelids grew heavier by the second and the dull ache you felt on the side of your face had turned into throbbing pain and all you wanted was for it to stop. At some point during the last four hours, you had started to silently cry and now a mixture of tears and blood colored your bed sheets an ugly red.

Ryan had left an hour ago, claiming he needed to ‘calm down from the disappointment you always caused’ and you knew that he was going to return practically wasted. And drunk Ryan always was a really violent Ryan.

You wanted to leave this apartment, leave him, but you didn’t know how or where to go.

Your muscles screamed in protest as you tried to sit up and you knew that there was no way you were going to be able to pack the most important things fast enough to not get caught.

There was a knock on the door. It only could have been Ryan, so you hurried to get up but ended up on the floor as your legs were too shaky to carry you. A round of sobs shook your body with its force and all you wanted was some peace. It had never been this bad before.

A hand touched your shoulder and you flinched in fear. “Please, no more,” you whimpered helplessly.

The hand started to gently stroke your back up and down. “Y/N, it’s me.”

Surprised, your eyes flew open. In front of you kneeled Natasha, worry written all over her face. “I’m getting you out of here. Can you stand?” She helped you up before she carefully let go of you, but your knees gave in immediately. Out of reflex, her hands flew to your hips to steady you again, but even for that, you were too weak as you fully collapsed into her steady arms.

“I’m taking that as a ‘no’.” Natasha changed your position to get a better hold on you but was interrupted by a shadow appearing above the two of you.

“What the fuck is this?”, Ryan growled and you kept your eyes open to see Nat’s eyes change from careful worry to anger within a millisecond and you were suddenly very grateful that it wasn’t directed towards you.

“Give me one second,” she said calmly searching your face for any sign of protest and set you back down when she found none, leaning your body up on the side of the bed. Even if you had wanted to, your body wouldn’t have been able to make the effort to stop her.

The next minutes were sort of a blur to you, you only heard grunts and protest coming from Ryan, mixed with sounds of fists colliding with body parts and the cracking of bones.

When you heard Ryan slowly slide down the wall groaning in pain, Natasha was back by your side. “We’re gonna go now, okay?”

You nodded slightly, wincing at the discomfort caused by your movement, and were soon hoisted up by her before she carried you bridal-style out of the building.

Outside, you were met with Steve Rogers standing beside a shiny black car. “Oh God,” he said, “Is she okay?”

“I hope so. God knows what that coward did to her.” The rage still hadn’t left her and was very much evident in her voice as she spoke. You slightly winced under the tone and, of course, she noticed.

“I’m sorry,” she said, much more kindly now, “It’s going to be okay.”

In the car, Steve spoke up again, “What’s with him?”

Nat shrugged. “I think he was still breathing when we left.”

Steve gave her a pointing look through the rearview mirror.

“What? It’s not like he will be any loss to humanity.”


You woke up half an hour after being put into a bed in the tower. Nat was next to you, talking to other people in the room.

“I don’t understand why I even came with you. You handled the situation just fine.” The smile was evident in Steve’s voice.

“To stop me from killing him, which I didn’t, so thanks.”

Steve must have seen you stir awake because he said, “I’m going to leave you two alone then. Call me if you need anything.”

You heard a door open and close and saw that as your cue to open your eyes.

“Hey.” Nat moved her chair closer towards you. “How are you feeling?”

There was an unpleasant taste in your mouth and you tried to swallow it down, ending up a coughing mess. Nat handed you a glass of water.

When you finally stopped struggling for air, you spoke, voice hoarse and quiet, “better.”

Natasha nodded and silence settled around you two. Neither of you knew what to say.

“Thanks,” you broke it, eventually, “I don’t want to know what would have happened if you hadn’t saved me.”

Suddenly, her eyes grew very soft as she took your hand in hers. “I’m just glad you’re alive.”

“How did you know where I live?”

“Lived, honey. I’m not letting you go back to that place.” It amazed you how fierce she was. Afraid of seemingly nothing. But her words made you falter.

“I have nowhere else to go,” you admitted, staring down at your fingers fumbling with the blanket.

“You’re gonna live with me. Well, in the tower and only if you want, of course. I’m not deciding for you,” she said. Natasha made an effort to never behave like your ex-boyfriend had. “Everything is already arranged, though you can say ‘no’.”

You glanced at her and noticed that she was being serious, no bad joke was behind her words. “I would like that, thank you very much.”

She didn’t say anything as a response so you asked another question. With her, you somehow weren’t afraid to say the wrong thing. “But how did you know? You never answered my question.”

Nat grinned at you. “That didn’t go past you, I see,” she chuckled, making you smile in the process, “Once I saw the bruises, I had F.R.I.D.A.Y. look you up. I saw that your boyfriend had been to arrested for assault and domestic abuse with his last girlfriend and then I just-“, she paused, “you know the rest.”

You nodded, not knowing what to reply. Suddenly, you felt ashamed of what happened to you. You could have done something other than just letting it happen. “I’m sorry,” you whispered.

Nat perked up a that. “What are you sorry for? You have done nothing wrong!”

You shrugged. “I’m sorry I put you in this position.”

Natasha reached out for you, her fingers gently moving your face towards her. “Listen to me, Y/N. You are the most gorgeous person I have ever met. You are so gentle and kind. Your smile affects me so easily; I honestly don’t know how you’re doing it. I would save you over and over again.”

Your eyes grew big at her words. The thought of Ryan saying such nice things to you would have never crossed your mind in a million years. Sudden emotions overtaking you, tears began to silently roll down your cheeks, one hastily chasing the other until you were full-on sobbing right in front of her.

In an instant, Natasha was out of her seat and climbed onto the bed with you, hugging you tightly to her chest. The action made you yelp as she accidentally put pressure on some of your injuries. Immediately, she let go of you, apologising profusely. “Shit, sorry. I didn’t think of your wounds.”

Although she laid you back onto the bed, Nat stayed close to you and held your hand once more. “Fuck, I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

“No, it really isn’t. Hurting you is never okay.”

There was silence after she spoke as her words had made a point you didn’t know what to add to.

Her hand intertwined with yours brought you such comfort, you didn’t know where to put it. You were so grateful that she had decided to buy her coffee in the exact café you worked at and then decided that she apparently liked you enough to go through all that trouble of saving you.

“Y/N?”, she broke the silence hesitantly.

“Natasha?”

“I would really like to kiss you.”

“Then do it.”


‘Everything’ Tag List: @alphaabucky* @barnesandnoble13 @barnes-heaven* @buchananbarnestrash* @buckysmusculararm @buckyywiththegoodhair* @captnbarnesrogers* @courtneychicken @hellomissmabel* @hollycornish @justanotherbuckydevotee* @katie27hp @kimcarcrashin @mellifluous-melodramas* @minervaem* @namelessdecoy @palaiasaurus64 @pfingstrosenherz @silverwolf7850 @smile-about-little-things @stovehairington @teacher-crushed @your-queen-your-daddy

INSULTS, THREATS, AND FLIRTATIONS. (6/6). from the lines for all occasions series. 

  • I’ll take you down with me.
  • Failure’s not an option.
  • This is going to cost you.
  • Hi. You’ll do.
  • If you get any closer, I’ll need more ice.
  • Come live in my heart and pay no rent.
  • If I throw a stick, will you chase it?
  • I’m an artist, and I think I just found my muse.
  • If somebody were to write your biography, the climax would be meeting me.
  • The only thing you should exercise is caution.
  • I’ll walk.
  • My neck hurts from insulting you.
  • I own you.
  • Okay, I’m here! What’s your second wish?
  • Oh, no, I forgot detergent!
  • I’m only interested in the opinions of people I respect.
  • Get a hold of yourself.
  • What time do you get off, and how?
  • Do you have change for a ten-thousand-dollar bill?
  • Do I make you nervous?
  • Let’s  implement a strategic initiative.
  • It’s not contagious.
  • I carry mace.
  • Champagne can tickle your throat, and so can i.
  • You look like you could use a one night stand.

((I hate to do this… I hate it so much.

But I don’t know where else to go. I need money, and fast, like really really fast. I’ve got about two weeks to pay off my bill, and I just got paid. And it wasn’t enough. 

I need about three hundred dollars to pay my rent/college expenses or I will become homeless. I have enough food and gas to take care of those needs. I can’t even set up a payment plan, because the last time I did, something went wrong with my card, and by the time I found out, I couldn’t set up another. If I don’t pay in time, I don’t get my credits and I can’t attend class in the fall. I literally need two more classes to graduate and move on.

I just set up my etsy shop- https://www.etsy.com/shop/BetteyStudio?ref=search_shop_redirect ) and I will do anything for money right now. Commissions? Sure, I will draw anything. I will draw naked… dogs for you. As I’m typing this now, there’s only one listing, but I’m working on it- Soon there will be more.

And if you want to donate, that will be just as great. Message me, cause I don’t know how to link my paypal just yet. If someone can tell me how that would be the best. 

Please, Please reblog this at least, help me out. I don’t know what else to do and I can’t turn anywhere else for help. I’m actually begging for help. 

Sex Bet

Barry walked into the room and sighed heavily, his eyes glued to Iris’s smooth legs spread propped up on the couch cushions as she scrolled her phone screen.

She was wearing an oversized sweater and her hair was swiped across her right shoulder, leaving the nape of her neck on her left side open to his viewing.

It had been three days since Cisco had frustratingly stalked out of his workshop, whining about how he was tired of walking in on them in promiscuous positions. Barry had flushed, while Iris defiantly told Cisco he couldn’t possibly be scarred THIS time, since not a single article of clothing had been removed.

‘Your hands were places!’ He’d shot back, clearly agitated.

Iris had rolled her eyes and raised an eyebrow. Barry had stayed mum. Then Cisco issued the challenge of all challenges and Iris, ever willing to put that boy in his place for objecting to her love life with her FIANCÉ, had INSTANTLY risen to the challenge.

'I bet you two couldn’t last one day without having sex with each other.’

'Maybe you forgot that we were broken up for a week at one point and didn’t fuck AT ALL during that time.’

Barry’s face lit up fire engine red at her language, his eyes widening noticeably, but Cisco remained unaffected.

'Hard to fuck when you’re barely on speaking terms, let alone in the same room.’

Barry swallowed hard, worried about more than the language now. He had instinctively BAD feeling of the direction of this conversation.

Cisco and Iris stared each other down for a full minute before the tension for Barry became unbearable.

'Guys-’

'One week.’

'What?’ Barry’s mouth went dry but neither acknowledged him.

'I bet you couldn’t go one week without having sex with each other,’ Cisco said. 'You’re…’ he glanced briefly over at Barry, clearly annoyed, 'insatiable.’

Barry had no time to be crushed by Cisco’s disgust b/c the next word that came out of Iris’s mouth shattered his very existence.

'Deal.’

He’d protested immediately and had promised all matter of things to both of them if only they’d undo this stupid bet, but neither relented. Iris was determined to win & Cisco gloried in the promise of a week long reprieve of witnessing Barry & Iris sexy times. And twenty bucks.

In fact, he wanted it so badly that he frequently egged Iris on how they wouldn’t able to make it that long that it only made her more determined to remain celibate.

When Barry tried to seduce her that first night - which was usually remarkably easy - she refused, reminding him of the bet they’d made.

'YOU made,’ he retorted. 'I was highly against it from the start.’

'Do you have no self-control?’ She shot back.

'None,’ he said instantly. 'Not where you’re concerned.’

Then she’d cupped his face, and he’d thought she would cave or at the very least tie him over with a kiss. But she denied him even that.

'Just give me this one thing, babe. We can have a sex marathon when the week is up.’

He blinked. 'But we’re not even at STAR Labs. We’re at HOME. Cisco won’t know if we have sex at home. And it’s hardly fair for him to be-’

'It’s the deal we ma-’

'YOU made,’ he corrected again.

She’d smiled serenely, which didn’t make him feel better at ALL.

'It’ll be easier not to slip up in public if we’re keeping ourselves in check in private too.’

'Says WHO?’ He’d squeaked. 'I’m jacked up already and it’s been less than twenty-four hours. You’re hot as hell, Iris. There’s no way I’m going to last sleeping next to you every night.’

'You do make a good point,’ she’d said contemplatively.

He’d wanted to be relieved, but he knew she wasn’t going to cave that quickly.

'Maybe you should sleep on the couch,’ she’d said, and gotten off it to retreat into another room.

Well, Barry had been so shocked that he’d ended up insisting to her that he wouldn’t seduce her in her sleep. He had enough self-control for that. She’d smiled that unsettling smile again in response.

'I know you do, babe,’ she’d said. 'And don’t worry, you’ll get through this.’

It worried him that she didn’t say 'we’ll.’ As if she had absolutely no problem not sleeping with him for seven days straight.

Today that was being put to an end.

Barry sauntered over to Iris. When he was in front of her, he said nothing, only waited for her to become aware of his presence.

'What is it?’ She asked, not looking up from her phone.

'I’ve had enough, Iris,’ he said, putting as much stubborn demand as he could into his voice.

Iris’s finger stilled. She lifted her head to look up at him.

'Enough of what?’ She asked.

It bothered him that she actually seemed to not know.

'Enough of you having absolutely no problem resisting sex with me.’

A coy smile started to spread across her face.

'I have been going out of my MIND,’ he squeaked. 'But you have been just FINE. Just so…so…’ His eyes drifted to her smooth legs that he ached to run his hands over.

And then wrap around his waist as he thrust into her.

'I wouldn’t say that…’ she teased, taking his hand in hers and pulling him onto the couch beside her.

She sat up so she could pull her legs back and then draped them across his lap. His hands hovered above them, afraid this was a trap. He looked to her for direction.

'Go ahead, Bear.’ She nodded to her limbs laying across his. 'Touch.’

That word alone gave him a hard on, made him shiver.

Iris smirked. 'Or maybe you don’t need to.’

Barry closed his eyes and reverently laid his hands on her legs, then squeezed gently, caressing them with exquisite care and barely controlled need.

And then the unthinkable happened.

A quiet moan emerged from the depths of Iris’s throat.

Barry’s eyes flashed open, and he turned to look at her.

Her eyes were closed, but they opened slowly, lust evident in them. Barry gulped.

'See,’ she said. 'I’m suffering just as much.’

Hesitantly, unsure if this was the right move, or smart by any stretch of the imagination, Barry started to lean towards her, retreating a couple times even as his hands started to move up to her thighs.

Then without warning, Iris impatiently grabbed a fistful of his t-shirt and pulled his toward her until their lips collided and a second moan was released the moment his tongue came into contact with hers.

'Wh-What about the bet?’ Barry asked, a century of making out later, well aware how dumb THAT move was.

Iris was breathing heavily as she tilted her head back to look into his eyes.

'Let’s just say I’ve found CISCO in compromising positions multiple times with CYNTHIA during the past three days, and I finally got him to fess up as to why he was so irritated about running into us.’

'We were stealing his make out spots.’

She grinned. 'We were stealing his make out spots.’

Barry was giddy with delight.

'So…does that mean…?’

Iris reached down into her pocket and pulled out a twenty dollar bill.

'That means we won the bet, baby.’

He grinned. 'But that wasn’t-’

'I called him out on his deceptive motivation and he caved.’

Barry’s eyes sparkled. 'I love you.’

'We have to try very hard not to fuck in his workshop, but otherwise we’re home free. He will not harass us in the future for any excessive PDA.’

'What’s the twenty for?’ Barry asked. 'You guys never discussed numbers.’

Iris laughed.

'That’s to keep us out of his workshop for the rest of the week.’

'A failsafe,’ he concluded.

'Mhmm.’ She started to pull him in again.

He moaned into the kiss. His hands started to wonder.

'Touch me, Barry,’ she begged, a hot whisper on her tongue.

He groaned and sped them upstairs to their bedroom where he revealed himself as fully erect and frantically searching for a condom.

They both came fast, a result of their short-lived celibacy. But then they made love slowly, torturously, and more than once that night.

'No more bets like this,’ Barry whispered against her breast where his head lay resting after their final time that night.

Iris absentmindedly played with his damp locks and pressed kisses to his skin.

'I’ll try not to agree to anything sex-related,’ she said.

'Only if it involves ABSENCE of sex,’ he clarified. 'Otherwise…’

Iris smile spread into a wide grin. She bit her lip at his thirst, hers too.

'Agreed,’ she said. 'OTHER sex bets could get interesting.’

He mumbled something incoherent in agreement and tightened his hold around her wait.

'G'night, Iris.’

Iris smiled tenderly, closing her eyes as well as she relaxed deeper into the pillows.

'Goodnight, baby.’

Secrets.

Originally posted by martziplier98

Request from @fangirl-for-the-broken: Hey! Can you do a one shot or a set of HCs where reader is a broke af single mom (adopted from a sibling or something) and Eth absolutely loves them, so when she starts dating a really rude guy because he helps her support her child, he gets upset. A few days later, reader finds him ranting to Amy or Kat about how he wishes that she would wake up and realize that he was in love with her and talking about all the ways that he would treat them like royalty? Sorry if it’s long, I love your writing!

Author’s Note: This is super late and super long. Hope you enjoy! PS thanks to my irl bff for typing my writing out for me while I was at work so I could just copy and paste!!

Warnings: Swearing, a mention of a drug addicted family member, anda dick boyfriend.

Okay. $60 for groceries to last the entire month. What did you need? You glanced down at your list, determining what you could afford to cut out, when you hear Ethan behind you. 

“Ouch!” 

Turning quickly, you see him with a sore finger in his mouth, smiling as Jemma giggled. “Did she bite you again?” you questioned, but couldn’t help smiling at the situation. 

“My fault,” Ethan admitted, removing the red finger from his mouth and continuing on to tickle Jemma, who’s giggle escalated into full blown laughter. “We were playing Dinosaurs and Jem was the mighty T-Rex!” 

Your kid sister rawred at Ethan who rawred right back, and the laughed together like they were in their own little world. The sight made the smile on your face grow as you ran a hand over Jemma’s hair. “Be careful with Ethan, alright Jem? We still need him around.” Ethan gave a grin up to you before he started pushing the cart again. You stared for a moment longer before worrying eyes found the grocery list once more.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

a large local event is taking place this week so apparently the entire area is getting a deluge of fake 20 and 100 dollar bills that pass the pen test. the 100s have strips, they're indented properly .. the only thing missing is the watermark. it's fuuuucked. everyone's on high alert, and they're thinking of telling people to not accept 100s at all because the teenagers slack off on checking them.

I have come across some really good fakes in my 30 years of retail life. I have found look for all the markers ( strip, watermark, etc..) from the back of the bill. today’s high power scanners can pick them up on the front of the bill so when they print them it sort of looks like it’s there. But I have never seen it faked from the back. 


edit: Forgot to sign it. oops…


-Rodney

anonymous asked:

Hey tell me ab your gf

oh my God where do I start she’s the best. One thing that really stands out about her is that she is so strong. She is so so so strong. She has people that are awful to her she has her insecurities and she’s depressed but she still manages to smile and she sees the good in everyone. She’s nice to everyone even those who don’t deserve it. The world doesn’t deserve her but she still blesses this crooked world with her generosity.

She is so talented. She plays saxophone, piano, and the ukulele. She draws, she paints, she cooks, and she has the greatest voice in the history of ever. She never ceases to amaze me. Every day I’m learning more and more of her capabilities and I want to keep learning more and more about her as much as I can.

She is the most thoughtful person I know. For Valentines Day she made a book of 102 reasons why she loves me. She played her ukulele and sang to me and it was one of the best moments of my life, I am constantly playing her voice back in my head because it was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever witnessed. On top of that, she got me a big box. I opened it and there was another box. Then another, another, another, til finally i found a roll of toilet paper. I unrolled the entire thing to find a $1 dollar bill. It was one of the best days of my life.

I don’t know what I would be without my girlfriend. I love her so much more than to the moon and back. I love her to the moon and past the moon and and all the planets and stars and black holes. She’s the light of my existence and I wouldn’t have it any other way. That is a little about my girlfriend.

Never

Title: Never

Pairing: Dean x Female!Reader

Warning: Swearing

Word Count: 3051

Requested: Yes

Summary: In an attempt to cool things down between Dean and The Mark, Reader suggests that the boys take a simple low profile case. And soon, things take a turn for the worst.

Tags: @johnmurphys-sass, @lilyleely, @16wiishes

A/N: So, this was a requested imagine/one shot. I really hope you like it! Just a quick disclaimer, this is kind of set in season eleven and ten where Dean has The Mark. It doesn’t really follow any of the episodes. Also, I made up Gademan, Kansas, it’s not a real place. So, naturally, any other places mentioned in that town are also not real. Anyway, if you have anything else you’d like to see, please just send me a quick message in my ask box. Enjoy!

Originally posted by morarossi

Reader

It’s true what they say. In those final moments, the world flashes by. In merely seconds, you witness it all. Your first kiss to your last, all the friends you’ve made and the few that stayed, all the family that turned a blind eye when you were drowning and all the family you turned a blind eye to when they were drowning, all the laughter and tears that soon infused together, all the hope you had and now lost forever, and all the pain you endured from your very first moments to your very last.

But even through all that, he was the only thing you truly wanted to see. Because he was all that mattered.

“I didn’t mean to.” he rasped, face bloody as he leaned over you. Cradling your head in his lap, he let an endless stream of tears fall as he repeated, “I didn’t mean to.”

Staggering for air, you watched as each tear hit your cheeks, mixing with yours. Your weak hands intertwined with one of his and held your stomach tightly in an effort to slow down the leaking force ready to tear you away from him. You opened your mouth, ready to comfort him, to forgive him, but your words trailed off.

And there echoed only one word, “Dean,”

Gademan, Kansas - Fifteen Hours Earlier

The blinding sun shined down on two stiff bodies. They lied, bent out of shape and tinted blue from loss of blood, deep behind the tall yellow grass of Territ Fields. Surrounding them were countless police officers and neon yellow tape stopping all friends and family from interrupting the case.

Shutting off the roaring engine, you all hopped out of the car dress in your clean suits. Dean slightly tugged at his tie; he always hated wearing that thing. You, after flattening out your grey pencil skirt, lightly grabbed his elbow.

He stopped in his tracks and turned to you, slightly concerned, as Sam continued to make his way to the crime scene. You gave your boyfriend a small smile then lightly tighten his tie, fixing it in place.

“I hate this thing.” he muttered, tilting his head up a bit while you straightened out his collar.

Running your hands down his chest to dust off his jacket, you mumbled, “I know,”

“Agents,” Sam called on the other side of the yellow tape. He stood beside a hesitant officer that was carefully watching you and Dean.

The both of you quickly moved towards Sam and flashed your badges to the officer.  After granting you access, you began to circulate the two bodies, looking for clues, as the boys talked to the lead detective.

Each lifeless body had two bite marks on the sides of their necks, just as you suspected. You looked up to Dean, catching his eye, and mouthed, “Vamps,”

He nodded, and turned whispering to Sam as the detective continued to brief them about the case.

You turned back to the bodies. They were two young boys. One was a redhead, and quite buff. There other had black hair and though he wasn’t as built as the other, he still held a strong frame. Then, a detail you somehow managed to look over, your eye caught the boys’ bright blue and white jackets. Varsity jackets, or more specifically, sorority jackets - based on the greek lettered badge. You quickly pulled out your phone and snapped a picture of  one of  the badges before getting up from your crouched position.

You, then, made your way over to Sam and Dean. Just as you arrived, the detective left. “You owe me five bucks.” you smirked at Sam as he rolled his eyes and dug into his pocket.

“Lucky guess.” he grumbled, handing the crisp five dollar bill.

You gave him a proud, gloating smile. “So, what did you find out?”

“Not much,” Dean sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. You and Sam shared a quick weary look as Dean continued, “They got an anonymous call around five in the morning. They came and found them dead, not a drop of blood to be found anywhere.”

You nodded, your hand finding it’s way to his. “They’re college kids.” you added. “I got a picture of some sorority seal.” You took out your phone and showed them the seal.

Sam immediately began making his way to the car. “I’ll go find out if there are any colleges near here.” he said, leaving you and Dean to follow behind him.

“How are you feeling?” you asked once Sam was far enough away.

Dean shrugged. “I’m fine.” he brushed off, letting go of your hand and picking up his pace.

You exasperatedly sighed even though you were quite used to Dean pushing you away. In the daylight, he’d hold a straight face. But, once the night fell, he’d break down, pulling you closer into his chest.

Either way, you shook off another one of his many rejections and decided to change the subject. “I hate vamps.” you groaned, pulling your hair out of the tight bun it was in.

“Well, this was your idea.” Dean reminded as he started the car. “You practically begged us to take this case.”

The only reason you begged was to get their minds off Crowley and his demons. And since Dean was having such a hard time controlling the call of  The Mark, you thought it might be a bit easier for him to go on a killing frenzy on monsters that deserve it, rather than an innocent.

You nodded, shaking out your hair with your hand. “Yeah, that’s because I hate them so much.” you lied, though you knew he’d see right through it.

Dean, pulling out of the field, rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I’m sure that’s the reason.”

“Gademan University,” Sam suddenly interjected.

You slightly jumped forgetting about his presence in the car. A hand found it’s way on your thigh, and you looked up to find Dean smirking at you. He winked, gave your leg a quick squeeze, then turned back to the road. Suddenly, the lingering sting of  pain from his dismissal disappeared.

“Can I see that seal again, (Y/N)?” Sam asked from his seat in the back. Since you started dating Dean, Sam learned the hard way that the front seat was always reserved for you, whether he called it or not.

You nodded, taking out your phone. “Here,” you passed the phone back to him.

Dean’s eyes momentarily flickered back to the rear view mirror, and he snorted, “Nerd,”

You rolled your eyes and lightly smacked his shoulder with the back of your hand. “Stop,” you disparaged. You turned back to Sam, and lowly admitted,  “But he’s right.”

Sam sighed heavily as he gave you an irritated stare. “You guys are so annoying.” he muttered as he typed away on his laptop.

You let out a small laugh, turning back in your seat. The car suddenly took a sharp turn onto oncoming traffic. Your head snapped to the right and as the head light came closer and closer you felt your soul slowly escape your body. You held onto your seat and screwed your eyes shut, ready for the impact, but it never came.

You opened them to find yourself beside a gas pump. You were at a gas station. You turned to face Dean, shocked and rather angry.

He didn’t seem fazed by any of it. In fact, he didn’t even notice your hard glare. He just hopped out of the car, mumbling, “Anyone want anything?”

You turned to look at Sam. He held a similar expression, confused, and surprised. Your eyes flickered back to Dean.

He raised his eyebrows up at you, still waiting for an answer. “Well?”

You let out a shaky breath, and shook your head. “No,” you whispered.

“Sam?” Dean asked, slightly bending down to look at his brother.

Sam shook his head, still just as baffled as you. Shrugging, Dean slammed the door and rounded the car.

You turned to Sam. “He has no idea.” you spoke lowly, afraid he’d hear you through the windows as he filled up the car.

“He can’t go to the nest with us.” Sam replied in the same tone.

You shook your head. “What? That might be the one thing he needs.”

Sam furrowed his eyebrows at you. “What the hell gives you that idea? (Y/N),  he needs rest.”

“Do you honestly think he’s going to go for that?” you hissed. “If we lock him up in that motel room, he’d find a way out and to that nest before we do. It’s better if he’s with us. We can keep an eye on him.”

Sighing, Sam hesitantly nodded. “Fine. But, how long do you think it’s gonna last before he figures out we’re basically babysitting him?”

“He’s-” you cut yourself off  as the car door opened, and Dean hopped back in.

He looked between you and his brother, then shut the door. “Find anything?” he asked, starting the engine.

“No.”

“Yes.”

The two answers left both of your lips simultaneously. Your eyes darted to the back seat confused. You quickly changed your answer  just as Sam did.

“Yes,”

“No,”

Dean’s green eyes flickered between the two of you. “What the hell is going on?” he questioned, turning the engine off.

You gulped, and turned to Sam. “There’s a party tonight at the sorority. I just found it here,” Sam explained, turning the laptop around to show you and Dean.

Dean turned to you. “So, you don’t wanna go?” he asked you.

You shook your head. “I hate sorority girls.” you lied.

Dean gave you a careful look. You were sure he’d seen through your lie, though he played along anyway. “You should come anyways.” he shrugged, starting the car again.

You nodded, mumbling, “Fine.”

As Dean drove out of the station, looking both ways before getting back on the road, you sent a cautious look towards Sam.  And as he returned it, you both just knew, Dean already knew what you two were up to.

The only question was, why wasn’t he doing anything about it?

“Ugh,” you groaned as you got out of the car. You shoved your silver gun behind you in the waistband of your black skinny jeans. “I really do hate sororities.”

Dean messed up his hair a bit as he stood beside you. “They aren’t that bad.”

Sam laughed, walking a few ways before the two of  you. “That’s cause you’ve slept with half of the girls.”

Your head snapped to Dean. He quickly gave Sam an angry glare before giving you a guilty smile. “Just barely half.” he defended with a nervous chuckle.

You rolled your eyes, humming an unconvinced, “Mmhm.” Ignoring his attempts to call you back, you walked ahead of them towards the door.

The closer you got the door, the louder the muffled music became. You opened the door and entered, not bothering to knock.

To say it was loud was an understatement. There were people chanting names as others chugged down their cups of beer. And while others danced, some people chanted, laughed and threw out dares to one another.

“I’m the king of the world!” a voice called from the living room. You walked farther into the room and turned around to find some drunk guy with a baby blue bed sheet tied around his neck as a cape. He stood at the top of the banister over the ledge with a long rope tied to the end of the banister and the tree outside the window located downstairs. And, with a clothing hanger through the rope, the boy held on tight and started to count down.

“Three,” he started.

“Two,” everyone joined in.

“One,” And, with that,  he propelled himself forward.

He didn’t reached two inches forward before the rope snapped and he was going down.

The room fell silent as he thumped to the ground. Suddenly,  Dean was beside you looking for the drunk kid.

“Yeah!” the kid shouted, shooting up from the floor.

The room erupted in a loud cheer, Dean included. You turned to look at him, fighting back a smile. He turned to you, laughing. “That kid’s crazy!” he shouted over the cheers.

You nodded, glad his mind was off that cursed mark, as the room chanted his name, “Doug! Doug! Doug!”

Turning back to the kid, you found him talking to Sam. For once, you found the serious, nerdy Sam actually enjoying himself. It was pretty odd, if you were being honest.

You watched as their happy expressions switched to solemn ones for a few moments. Once their conversation was done, Sam made his was over to where you and Dean were standing.

“Hey,” a guy said, sneaking his hand around your waist. Your eyes flickered from him to an annoyed Dean. “Can I get you a drink?” he asked.

Just as you were about to politely decline, Dean tore the boy’s hand off  you and placed his hand there instead. He pulled you closer to him, glaring at the boy. “She’s fine.” he growled, scaring the guy away.

You gave Dean a knowing smirk as he whispered in your ear, “I’m starting to see what you mean.”

“The Far House.” Sam yelled the moment he reached you, interrupting your conversation. “That’s what they call it anyways.”

You furrowed your eyebrows, confused. “What’s that?”

“It’s an abandoned barn these kids go to… to be alone. It’s about twenty minutes from here.” he explained. “And guess the fastest way to get there?”

“Territ Fields.” Dean answered. “Let’s get the machetes and kill some sons of bitches.”

The three of you quickly went back to the car, grabbed your weapons, then cut through the backyard and down the street. Just off the road was a woody trail that soon bordered the long, weedy field. You cut through it, the old red barn slowly coming into view.

“Don’t they usually nest in warehouses?” you asked.

Sam shrugged. “Maybe their trying to throw us off their scent.”

Dean scoffed. “Those suckers aren’t smart enough to think through that. They’re stupid enough to leave those bodies behind.”

You knitted your brows together. Maybe Dean was onto something.

“Okay, we need a plan.” Sam stated, stopping just a few paces from the door.

And while you stopped beside Sam, Dean continued towards the door, “I have one.” he replied. “Don’t die.”

“Cause that’s worked before.” you sarcastically muttered, following behind him.

However, before you and Sam could get to the door, you already heard a loud high pitched scream. You ran in, finding some girl’s head rolling on the floor and Dean slowly moving deeper into the barn. She couldn’t have looked anything over twenty. You crouched down to examine her face as Sam hurried behind Dean.

Her lips were perfectly glossed, hair - besides the fact it was now stained with blood - was perfectly done, and her lashes - though her eyes were dull and lifeless - were perfectly curled and coated.

A sorority girl.

It all suddenly made sense. They were inexperienced, they didn’t know what to do with the bodies, they couldn’t control their urges. They were the ones that called the cops.  

Another scream was cut short followed by a few grunts and hisses. You immediately shot up from you place and ran towards the noise.

As Sam was trying to fight off  a buff sorority kid, Dean was swinging his machete around, not missing a single head.

“Dean, stop!” you shouted. “They’re just kids.”

He ignored you as the blood splattered across his face. You knew it was risky, knew what could happen. Yet, you did it anyways.

You ran towards him and grabbed his right arm. The arm holding the machete, the arm that just cut off the last vamp’s head. Caught in his bloodlust, he tore his arm away, the sword slicing through your abdomen.

A raspy breath escaped your lips as the pain cut through you. You stumbled back, eyes wide and watery. The darkness that once consumed him, disappeared the moment he caught the agony that cried from you eyes.

“(Y/N),” he whispered.

You tripped over your own feet and he lunged towards you. He caught you just before you hit the ground. “I didn’t mean to.” he rasped, face bloody as he leaned over you. Cradling your head in his lap, he let an endless stream of tears fall as he repeated, “I didn’t mean to.”

Staggering for air, you watched as each tear hit your cheeks, mixing with yours. Your weak hands intertwined with one of his and held your stomach tightly in an effort to slow down the leaking force ready to tear you away from him. You opened your mouth, ready to comfort him, to forgive him, but your words trailed off.

And there echoed only one word, “Dean,”

It was blurry. The moment you opened your eyes, it was blurry. It took you a while to blink your vision back to normal. Yet, all you could see was white. You got up, but a sharp ache from your gut stopped you. You groaned at the pain before attempting to sit up again, this time slower.

Then it all sunk in. You were in a hospital bed, with Sam sleeping in a chair near the corner. Memories of why you were here flooded back to you. The party, the vamps… Dean.

“I’m sorry,” a hoarse voice suddenly came from the doorway.

You snapped you head towards it and found Dean puffy eyed and red. Shaking your head, you mumbled,  “It was my fault.”

Dean violently shook his head, making his way to you. “No, I-”

“I was the one that begged you to take this stupid case, and told Sam that you needed this. It’s my fault.” you cut him off. “I don’t blame you for any of it. Now, please, stop blaming yourself.”

Dean opened his mouth to argue, but shut it once you gave him a pointed look. Hesitantly, he nodded and sat down on the bed beside you. He held your hand up to his chapped lips and gave it a quick peck.

“Don’t leave,” he whispered as the tears resurfaced. “You can’t leave.”

You nodded as your eyes watered. “Never,”

Pose: SamxMika

This is an excerpt of an AU story I’ve been in the process of writing. It’s originally a self-insert story, but I put in Mika’s name for the purpose of a fanfic setting.

Synopsis: Sam is human and Mika is a model. They both live different lives, but one situation will bring them together.

Disclaimer: I do not own Sam (but I wish I did). May contain blood and violence.


It was already two in the afternoon and I was beginning to feel the exhaustion of this extensive photoshoot. The breeze from the fans that created an artificial wind for my hair put me in a sleepy daze. I struggled to fight a yawn from creeping out of my mouth as the camera snapped at several angles of my body. Pout a little more, run your hand through your hair, bite your lip with an innocent look. All of the common photogenic poses but with my unique twists.

My specialty in my photos was the sweet and innocuous attitude with a dash of sensual temptation. According to my manager, he highly suggested to lean a little more toward the saccharine girlfriend look, but I hardly listened to him. The photoshoots, however, always ended well and today was no exception. I received a round of applause from the crew members and photographer for a job well done. I replied with my reciprocated gratitude for their hard work.

Keep reading

As a little girl, I looked forward to losing teeth. It meant a visit from the tooth fairy…and although I knew she’d pilfer the tooth left under the pillow without me getting the merest glimpse of her fairy finery, I didn’t mind, because hey, she would replace my useless tooth with money! So when I had a loose tooth, I’d try to speed up the process as much as I could stand by constantly prodding said tooth with my tongue or eating an apple (I wasn’t one of those intrepid kids who made short work of it by just pulling the thing out).

I was content with my dimes–and (gasp!) quarters for the bigger two front teeth–that is, until my eyes were opened to the disparity in the tooth fairy’s payments. I found out my friends and classmates were getting more, up to a whole dollar bill for those coveted front teeth! I suddenly saw the tooth fairy in an unfavorable light, as playing favorites…and I clearly got on her bad side somehow. I wondered what those other kids had that I lacked: charm? Connections? Less bratty behavior? And why was it that the kids who seemed to come from well-to-do families got the most? It isn’t fair!, I wailed in my underdeveloped mind, we should all get the same…but if anyone gets to get more, shouldn’t it be the kids who have so little already?

That was the beginning of the end of my faith in the fairy with the fetish for fallen chompers, around the same time I was questioning Santa’s gift selectivity and the Easter bunny’s basket-bearing. I was starting to shed some of my innocence, to find that the grownups were unfortunately not exaggerating when they kept saying “life isn’t fair.”

Day Sixty

-A man informed me that he was buying stocking stuffers. His purchase consisted of a bag of nuts, several pairs of plain socks, and a roll of tape. I hope Santa stops by with supplemental stuffers. His children deserve, at the very least, trail mix.

-I met a baby with unreasonably thick eyebrows and deep, wizened eyes that have seen more than I could ever imagine. I feel that I have been a part of history, selling formula to the second documented case of B. Button syndrome in recorded history. 

-I overheard Cat Lady delivering a lecture to an audience of none on the topic of the best candy over at Starbucks. Were I able, I would have taken my break immediately and sat, enraptured, learning the inner secrets of the candy industry. However, for now, I am grateful that she is gaining some solid public speaking experience.

-A man in a hoodie leaped back and forth through the doors, bent over, arms out to his side. I am reasonably certain that a gorilla of genetically-enhanced intelligence was on the lam from the laboratory and chose their first stop to be Target. I only wish that they had come through my lane so that I could have assisted their escape better.

-I heard a loud crash. Looking up, I found a woman had knocked over the display on the wall dividing the registers and the dollar aisle, leaving only her mortified face visible among a row of cartoonishly large boxes.

-I was handed a wrinkled dollar bill, the canvas of intricate doodles, a weathered strip of paper with a corner taped back on. I cannot help but think about the stories that this bill could tell. Perhaps it was handed from a US president to a McDonald’s cashier. It could have been a victim in a high-scale bank heist. This bill could even have paid for the last meal a man ever ate. Realistically it has just seen a lot of strip club floors and vending machine mishaps. 

-A woman set up shop in front of the soda machines, calling several credit card companies on speaker phone, holding her cell up to her ear regardless. This is the epitome of efficiency.

-I was asked what time it was. I informed the guest that it was 3:10. They told me that this meant that it was 12:10 in California. I was then informed that we are three hours ahead of California. She proceeded to count out three hours after 12:10 and ultimately concluded that it was 3:10. This expert sleuthing left me speechless and I hope she returns soon to discuss the specifics of the detective agency I silently resolved to found with her.

-An elderly woman in her seventies informed me, with an enormous grin, that she had just married her high school sweetheart. I have never been happier for a stranger and I hope we find the answer to immortality soon so that they can spend as much time together as they can.

-As a man was paying for his purchase, he told me that he was buying it at the advice of a friend who suggested it would be good for gift baskets. I looked down at his single box of unsalted crackers and silently reassured myself that it was okay to not be this man’s friend.

-I have found that the easiest way to pick up and scan baby dolls is to pick them up by the head and wave them around. I dearly hope to unlearn this habit by the time my firstborn arrives.

-The woman who had knocked over the display found herself checking out in my lane. I have never seen such instantaneous shame appear on one’s face as when she recognized me as the sole witness to her transgression.

-Today I saw a woman who had a beanie pulled over her baseball cap and a woman who seems to have fashioned a car mat into a high-end poncho. This is the sort of fashion innovation that I live for. 

-I may have been recognized by a reader, but I will never know as they did not do more than make intense eye contact and passionately wish me a good day. There are over twenty times as many readers of my stories as there are Target stores in the world, so I would like to remind everyone that if they do happen upon my store while I’m working, there is nothing I would love more than to say hello. I may have severe anxiety, but I also have a desperate need to have my ego stroked, so overall it will be a great time. 

Okay now I never thought I’d have to do this but my mom and I are in pretty dire need right now. Her emotionally abusive boyfriend (now ex boyfriend thankfully) is leaving us and brea

king our lease by the end of this week. Now alone, my mom cannot pay the rent. He took care of it since he was going to school and using his GI bill. But now, we’re in pretty desperate need to move and find a new place since my mom and I can’t afford the $1450 a month it takes to live here. Now, we’ve found a small and cheap place in the center of our town that we can afford (only about $600 a month) but we need a $1375 deposit and we don’t have enough notice/ time since he’s packing up and leaving so quickly.

I’d really appreciate if you could donate to my PayPal ( paypal.me/cuomonnoli since Tumblr isn’t letting me hyperlink it) even if it’s a few dollars. Any bit counts and I’d really like to stay in this town!! And not have to move again!! I’d really appreciate any help. Thank you so so much ❤︎