so i decided to do it myself

I am thankful that i do not decide my future. God does. Left to myself, my journey would have been smooth sailing in spiritually shallow waters. My life would have been filled with temporary pleasures and perpetual emptiness. So today, when i think back over the instances when God said no, despite my begging, i am thankful. Though some refusals have left an ache in my soul, i would not seek to reverse them because i often see purpose in them, but more importantly because i know that He will always do what is best for me. Even when i don’t understand why, i trust that God has a purpose in my pain.
—  The Scars That Have Shaped Me
INFJ Confession #3038

I’m so used to the fact that nobody truly understands me that I somewhen decided to stop explaining myself at all. When people ask me how I’m doing, it always seems to me as if I only told them so THEY would feel better because it never helps me talking about things to people who won’t understand me on a deeper level. So in fact I only fake problems now when people ask me how I’m doing. My real issues are safely stored in my own head and to be solved by the only one who will ever get them - me!

anonymous asked:

how do you make your persona in your sleeping powder video look like... bouncy??? i don't know how to describe it

okay so I’m not the BEST at explaining things but I’m gonna try

here’s the starting frame

I’ve decided this guy is gonna turn to his right with a LOT of ENERGY so I do a little windup first, by using the transform tool to lean him a bit in the opposite direction he’s about to move

then I use a smear frame to get him facing the opposite direction. This isn’t a great smear frame and I’m still learning how to make smear frames myself so I don’t have a lot of advice besides Do Lots Of Trial And Error

Then, I actually draw the final frame BEFORE I edit it to make this frame. This frame is the final frame but transformed to be leaning even further to the right.

And the final frame, which looks like the character is recoiling a bit from having leaned to the right so hard, creating the bouncy effect. Be sure to rest on this frame (and the first frame before a motion for that matter) for a bit longer than than the other frames, so that the viewer has time to process that the character has moved.

Another wip~ Now I’m in the process of colouring this huge thing, but I’m making good progress, so this might be the last wip I taunt/harass you with.

 Making this particular piece has been a bit of a personal challenge for me, I recently realised that I have, over the years, begun to unconsciously censor my own art; to be an artist that “can be taken seriously” mostly I think. It was not a nice realisation to make, I do this for myself after all, no one pays for me to do this or anything so, I should be free. So I decided to do something straight form my heart, and I hope the people that have come to know me in the last year won’t be too shocked to see me return to my eroguro roots. We will see :’D
 Idk, feels weird to even make a public comment like this, I rarely do this, it feels so whiny and I don’t think anyone really cares anyway :’D I love you all, you amazing people I’ve gotten to know in the past few years here, and thank you 

I just realized that I’m almost done with C25K. I’m planning on repeating week 7 so my endurance can improve a little more before I move on to the final week, but after that, WHAT WILL I DO WITH MYSELF? Go on to C210K? 30 Day Shred has been on my to do list. Any other recommendations?

My current routine is running M, W, F and strength training/body weight exercises T, T, S. We decided that once Anthony hits 150 lbs. lost (he’s currently at 115) we’ll get gym memberships! Tell me what your routine is!

anonymous asked:

Do you know what happened to zsra187? They had a bunch of fics but they are all deleted now on ao3. Also they had a tumblr but it seems to not exist anymore. Do you know if they are still active in the fandom?

Dear Anon,

I’d like to give you a more satisfying answer but I know as little information as you do. zsra187 had a blog here and some really good fanfics on AO3 and… she vanished someday. A couple of months ago, someone posted something about her sudden disappearance and that was all. No explanation - as far as I know - so I just guess she got tired of the fandom and decided to move on. To be honest, I didn’t know her that much.

It’s sad and maybe you regret she deleted her stories (as for me, I miss her stories and I remember them fondly) but I guess we need to respect her choice here and hope she’s doing alright. I don’t see myself in a fandom forever so… I kind of understand what she did (minus the deleted stories part).

Once again, I wish I could be more useful *sigh*

anonymous asked:

You need to write fanfictions because I am in tears sometimes and laughing so hard the other times. You really have talent. Aw man. ~Anon D

Oh my gosh, thank you so much! I actually do write fanfiction occasionally, but I’m absolutely terrible at keeping up with them. My schedule is bonkers and I always try to do so many things that I end up burning myself out before I get to finish or get too far! It’s part of the reason I decided to do headcanons for my skells instead of writing a full fanfic for them. 

This is my AO3 account though if you’re interested though! There are no Swap or SwapFell brothers, just a couple of unfinished self insert things. One is a platonic one with Gaster and the Reader, and the other is an Asgore/Reader one. ^^  


Cpa cancelled at last minute.

One care co has broken her foot over the weekend so is off for 6 weeks

My other care co is going on leave from Thursday

My ed nurse is on annual leave and has reduce his hours anyway so has less ability to fit appointments in

My social worker has vanished

I Can’t see my therapist until I’ve had my cpa and they decided what’s what

Dietician is in maternity leave

My gp has disappeared into thin air

Psychiatrist leaves next week……

And I’m here trying desperately trying to stop myself from drowning. I’m here quite literally doing what I hate and asking for help and in return I’m just left struggling to even breathe let alone thrive.

Sorry, I’m just really fed up of been let down. I’m honestly starting to believe I would be better off alone, at least then I’m alone rather than having people who are meant to help making things harder.

J was like ‘thank you for understanding’ but what was I meant to do, kick and scream??? Like people are allowed annual leave and v can’t help breaking her foot (even though she just had 2.5 weeks off on holiday) and my psychiatrist is free to change jobs, but I’m really really bad with unpredictability/change and it throws my anxiety levels sky high.

Really I’m just been pathetic, but I was kept in hospital for 13 months because 'we can’t offer the help you need in the community’ that was two years ago, in that time I had 6 weeks at a time with out appointments straight after discharge and katie dying, 7/8 months after discharge I went 5 months refusing to see anyone because my care co at the time had threatened me so much I was terrified to see anyone. I then started seeing the liaison team until they got me to agree to see tony again. I was then sectioned for 2 weeks and came out to a team which appeared PERFECT. I went October till march with out seeing my ed nurse, the dietician lost funding then got funding and then went to have her little baby girl. My social worker has vanished and not been seen or heard from since may 10th. My therapist was in annual leave constantly between new year and easter and then I didn’t feel well enough to see her and now I’ve asked to reengaged after constant pestering, I can’t until they decide what’s happening with my care at a cpa which got cancelled at last minute. And I have two care coordinators who won’t see me with out the other and when they do see me just talk at me, and don’t give me opportunity to off load or even talk.

I’m one of the lucky ones, I have been under services and on paper have an amazing package of care….. except over the past two years I have certainly proved the 'we can’t offer you enough support in the community’ Bs wrong because I’m doing this alone despite on paper it looking like I have loads of support.

Sorry, I should be so ungrateful. I am grateful. I’m grateful for the NHS and the rare incredible professional. I’m grateful for the opportunity to access free health care and to be under a locality which aren’t particularly time limited/ are willing to bend the rules to accommodate my needs.

I’m just so sick of reaching out just to have my hand pushed away. Asking for help is something I hate, I should be able to do this alone, but right now I need someone and instead they mess me around to the point it would be easier to be discharged and not be let down.

anonymous asked:

what's your inspo+ tag?

ah, well it’s basically things bts related that inspire me for fics. however, I made a sideblog @inspiblue just a few days ago, and I’m currently trying to move everything from this blog and my personal blog that fall under that inspiration umbrella to that new blog. it’s just things such as art, landscapes, boyfriend looks from the members, moodboards, ect. there’s even funny crack type of date dialogue / situations that I just find funny, and would find hilarious to base a fic around. I get inspired by random stuff, like a picture of a tree could rivet me to my fucking core somehow lmao. so that’s why I decided to make the sideblog and not just limit myself to reblogging kpop related inspiration on this blog. but if you do check it out, just know that my tags are a mESS, and basically just me scrawling random inspo I get in the moments lol. also I guess I’ll bring up that if you guys ever see something you feel is really inspiring and can give me a good kick in the heart, feel free to tag that blog, or here if you would prefer!

anonymous asked:

If you wouldn't mind us knowing: how many times have you jerked off and cummed this year? Do you ever feel you might be able to control yourself without the cage? :o

The cage has been on and off this year and whenever it was off I jerked off a lot!! So much that I felt really guilty recently and I decided to end it yesterday… feeling a lot better now as there is no way I can release myself and I can stop worrying :)


Okay back to happier (?) topics - today’s prompts were firsts/future/tears !!!! and honestly that’s probably a happy set why did I go for this even we might just never know

thanks for inviting me to the party. if you need me, i’ll be in the corner, drinking & trying not to make eye contact

She Never Stopped Smiling

by reddit user Pippinacious

Fly was an odd kid, even by odd kid standards. I met her in sixth grade, when our alphabetically ordered last names landed us in adjacent seats, and she turned to look at me with a cheerful, gap toothed smile.

“Hi!” She said.

“Hi.” I replied quietly.

I was shy and intimidated by my first day in middle school, but she wasn’t the least bit nervous.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

"crazy detention stories"...go

They’re really not that crazy I don’t think but fine- but as I had detention at least once a week for 3 years you’re only getting the highlights here:

  • So again, I only ever got detentions because I was late to school basically every day. Every single day, the office wrote me a late slip with my name spelled horrendously wrong. Different spelling every day. The most famous butchering was writing my name as “Millie Hoagie”. On my very last day of high school, I was predictably late, and they spelled my name perfectly correctly.
  • So listen my ‘reputation’ in school was basically “quiet good girl who’s never done anything wrong, ever, in her life” and “teacher’s pet” and the like. And despite the fact I was there every time all the ‘Bad Kids™’ who were also always in detention were always incredibly surprised to see me??? Like they never got over it. Every time I walked into the damn room at least half the class would be like “MOLLY YOU DON’T BELONG HERE YOU’RE INNOCENT!!” 😂
  • Also despite the fact I was basically invisible in the school as a whole all the trouble makers knew me by name because, and I quote a kid from my 10th grade Spanish class who was trying to hook up with me at the time here, “Guys like me are afraid of you, Girl, we’re just plain out scared that we gonna corrupt you!” and I still don’t know what he actually meant by that???
  • Bu anyway, this apparent rep usually gave me an upper hand with the teachers monitoring the detentions. Because, you know, some were fine, some were bitchy, some were insane. But all of them were pissed about the fact they had to be there instead of heading home.
  • The rules of detention were literally just ‘stare at the wall and don’t talk’, depending on which teacher they might let the students do homework. But since I was apparently a great person and always had the class’ incredulous response to me being in the room, they usually let me get away with sleeping or reading a book lol.
  • Of course…no one said any of the other kids were inclined to following the rules lmao. These were like, all the class clowns™ shoved into one room. Things always got real funny real fast.
  • It would always start off with the coughing game. If you’ve ever stepped into a school you should know what that is.
  • It would then escalate to everyone in the room playing catch whenever the teacher looked away for a brief moment
  • Detention was always in the health classroom so someone always tried to steal a limb off the skeleton without being to obvious
  • Some teachers would let people talk ‘quietly’ so jokes were fucking abound
  • One time I was minding my own damn business and a kid slides me a note saying ‘in like five minutes ask to go to the bathroom but head downstairs to the English wing’ before he snuck out without the teacher noticing. I get down there and he’s at one end of the hallway and another boy is at the other end. Upon seeing me, these boys run full speed down the hall at each other, leap up in the air when they get to the direct center, high five with full force, both scream in pain, and then hit the floor, clutching their hands. I was cracking the fuck up and trying to convince them to go to the nurse but they wouldn’t listen. I asked the guy why the hell they did that. He told me ‘because we wanted a witness and no one will ever believe you’ 😂😂
  • One time my sorta-neighbor Mike comes in and the teacher asked why he had detention and apparently, the principal had asked him where to find his friend Jose, and Mike responded “he’s out picking cotton” and the principal flipped out at what he perceived to be a racist joke and gave him a month detention. But the thing was, Jose was in an agriculture class and he was literally outside picking cotton that they had planted there earlier. Jose found it fucking hilarious and refused to tell the principal to get his friend out of trouble.
  • As I haven’t been inside a school building for quite some time now I don’t know if turtling is still a thing but it was…quite an epidemic for my senior class.
  • It’s when you turn someone’s backpack inside out right? But it was a full blown war with these kids. Trust no one. Never leave the room. Never look away. Holy shit. One of the best moments of this occurred in detention, when a boy reached to get a book out of his backpack to find it was gone. After 15 minutes of searching the room, he found it, turtled, hidden in a filing cabinet in the front of the room. Everyone, including the teacher, was loosing their shit, because how did someone pull that off so quietly and invisibly without someone noticing??? No one fessed up. The class was in fear of the turtle ninja for the rest of the month, but they never struck again. No one ever discovered who it was.
  • Guys: It was me.
  • One time it was raining and the teacher was in a bad mood so he insisted all the windows stay open. He left for a bathroom break or something and this one poor kid, who was now completely soaked as he was stuck with a window seat, just said “fucking bye” and just…climbed out the damn window. Left his backpack and everything. Didn’t see him again for at least a month.
  • There was one guy who always sold ice cream out of his bag when the teachers weren’t looking. Where he was getting it from and how it stayed frozen is beyond me.
  • Oh my God sometimes all the indie singer kids would just come and sit on the floor outside the classroom and talk loudly to annoy us??? The hell were they trying to accomplish??? Your singing ain’t special and you won’t be famous, please let us die in peace.
  • One kid had detention because when we were running laps in gym class he jumped up to hit the arch of the ceiling and accidentally set off the fire alarm. The teacher that day insisted on continuously referring to him as ‘the delinquent’, as if no one else in the room had broken the rules or something
  • One time one of the gym teachers was in charge of it and long story short he started doing the jersey turnpike. True horror.
  • One time the teacher got a call and she had to go down to the office and the second she was gone this one kid’s friend runs in with a huge tray going “Y’ALL I STOLE THE LASAGNE CUPCAKES FROM THE FOOD AND NUTRITION CLASSROOM” and we dined like kings.
  • Everyone would sometimes just break out in song for no God damn reason
  • One time one of the guys in charge of the detention was A) Not someone anyone recognized as a teacher and B) Potentially Stanley Tucci. Like…I was about 80% certain that this guy was Stanley Tucci.
  • He refused to confirm or deny or even give a name
  • One time I was really absorbed in my book when all the sudden a letter flew onto my desk, an anonymous sender that just said “You have a soft, sexy voice.” Neither of which is true, I’m pretty sure, and I could not for the life of me figure out who sent it omfg
  • One time a teacher was freaking out because he went to a psychic over the weekend and was told there was a lot of activity around him so I looked him straight in the eyes and told him I’m a medium and I can see that the devil had marked his soul and he threw me out of the room and refused to take that class for detention ever again😂
  • It was a hot summers day. The ceiling fans were on their highest setting. A boy nudges me, with a small carton of ice cream in his hands under his desk. “What do you think would happen if I scooped out a huge chunk of this and threw it at the fan?” he whispered. “Jamil, no.” I pleaded, but it fell on deaf ears. Soon, the room was filled with confused screams.
  • Apparently all the other regulars™ had bought me candy grams around Christmas time so they were confused when I showed up to detention with no candy and apparently the student council member sent them all to the other Molly in the grade because she was the popular one and this lead to about 12 boys grumbling for two and a half hours like “The one damn time I attempt to be a gentleman” and “I know where she lives” and “Gonna gingerbread her fucking locker” I could not stop laughing
  • Oh God okay one time the teacher we had was literally. Off the charts.
  • Like there’s the chill teachers, and then the bitchy teachers. And then this lady. She literally reminded me of Stubel
  • So I didn’t even know who she was but I walk in and do my shy smile/quiet ‘hello’ thing and take out my book so she immediately zeros in on me as ‘the good kid’ as usual
  • But she literally seemed to think every other person in this class was a hardened criminal holy shit. She was all over the place barking orders and yelling. And of course, you’ve got a room full of class clowns, like they feed off teachers like this. So the madder she got the more ridiculous they got. I was literally almost in tears trying to force myself not to laugh because I didn’t want to risk her turning on me omfg
  • So she yelled and flailed about the room and they kept going with jokes and paper wasps and lying about their names and just doing literally every thing they could possibly do so this woman wouldn’t have the chance to rest
  • This escalated with every minute and came to a resounding end when the teacher decided the Australian Kid™ was chewing gum and picked up the trashcan and shoved his face in it, screaming at him to spit it out as he yelled back “YOU’RE ONLY DOING THIS BECAUSE IM AN IMMIGRANT
  • he was in charge of all the bullshit that day and it was hysterical but he wasn’t the one chewing gum loudly that was me
  • The vp came in to see what all the yelling was about to find a teacher shoving a boy’s head in the trash, one boy shirtless as another drew tattoos on him, the phone off the line with it’s cord wrapped around a kid’s neck, two boys dueling with skeleton arms, one kid with her leg out the window, a kid tying a skeleton foot to the ceiling fan, rubber bands and paper wasps flying from every angle, three people turtling backpacks, someone brandishing an epi-pen, sexual hangman being played on the chalkboard, someone eating ice cream and fanning himself with money, and me, crying into my book with my hand literally bleeding from all my efforts to not laugh at what I was witnessing
  • We never saw her in detention again😂
  • My one younger friend got a detention for being late and was really shaken up about it and I tried to tell her she’d be fine but then she got caught sliding me chocolate animal crackers during it, and subsequently got another detention because of this; somehow I was not viewed as an equally guilty party and didn’t get in trouble
  • This one guy came in complaining “You guys all told me to get a twitter and I get thrown in twitter jail my first day!” “That’s like a thousand tweets in one day, how the fuck did you mange that?” “Bitch I had a lot to say about McDonalds!”
  • One teacher came in and was like “I don’t feel like helping with homework but does anyone wanna learn how to hack a computer?”
  • Someone got caught pouring water out the window but when the teacher looked to see why she saw the youngest of the goats™ standing under the window with it’s mouth open waiting for more
  • One time the teacher wouldn’t let me go to the bathroom and after I asked for like the 5th time he said “It can’t be that important!” so I just pulled a pad out of my backpack and silently sat it on my desk while glaring at him and this 40 year old man looked like he was about to pass out and he finally let me go
  • I remember our final detention of senior year we were told that if we skip it we can’t graduate so everyone went into that room with a ridiculously nostalgic attitude and one guy finally stole the skull off the skeleton and we fucking tossed it around the entire time while singing and blatantly ignoring the teacher’s complaining lmao
  • I know there’s more but it’s 7am and this is long so all in all like…I do not miss high school but some memories are bearable lmao

thru-the-mirror  asked:

Casual Sidon in a tank top 😍👌🏻

I made this with my own two hands and I still can’t believe how ridiculous and annoyingly pretty I designed this man.

I really tried to do “casual” again but then the eyeliner happened and I couldnt stop myself. Nothing is casual about sidon anyways so I’ll give myself a B - and a pat on the back for effort.
Men of Reddit, what innocent behaviors have you changed out of fear you might be accused of wrong doing? • r/AskReddit
14353 points and 13890 comments so far on reddit

Just a short selection of comments I found. It seems men can’t seem to get away from being called pedos and perverts.

Sticking to myself at shopping centers.

I’m a tall(6'3), bearded man who grew up in a small town of about 800. So I grew up holding the door for anyone, saying have a nice day or howdy everywhere I go, and help anyone with anything if they need it. It’s just how I was raised.

One day I was headed to my girlfriends house and decided to stop at Walmart to grab some snacks on the way down. I was 20 years old at the time, but for as big as I am and the beard you could confuse me for 25-30. Anyhow, I was standing in the chip isle and noticed a little girl no older than 5 wandering around looking frightened, so I walked over and said are you lost? And she just kept saying “ mommy ” so instantly trying to do the right thing I thought to take her to the cashier so she may call over the loud speaker and call for her mother. As I walked she held her hand up to hold mine and I thought nothing of it, being as I was only doing the logical thing. Next thing I know the mother runs up to me screaming and snatching her daughter up, calling me a kidnapper and threatening to call the police. I tried explaining the situation and where I was trying to take her, unfortunately she was an uneducated moron and at that point I got a little heated and decided to tell her to maybe not let her child run off next time. Moral of the story, I tried to do the right thing not even thinking about how it would look for a bearded man to be walking with your little girl, even though they shouldn’t of been left alone, but it’s definitely something I’ll never do again.

When shopping with my wife and she wants to try stuff on I just have her text me pictures of her outfits if she wants my opinion.

We were at Macy’s a few months ago and I was just patiently waiting outside the dressing room waiting for my wife and she would open the door and step out to get my opinion.

I was just looking at my phone and minding my own business when I notice people walking up to me. A middle aged woman had gotten a manager and she had brought a security official of some type and asked me to leave or they would be forced to call the police.

It was super embarrassing and now I feel super self-conscious when shopping with my wife.

I stopped going to the playground with my niece. She loves it when I’m there with her. Going on slides with her or pushing her swing. But according to the mother’s there and the old ladies its creepy for a man to go there, even with my niece.

At first I didn’t care, I just ignored them. But some even went as far to ask my niece who’s only 3 if I was her father and other inappropriate things. Even got the cops called on me twice and after explaining the situation and having to go as far as having to get my sister down there, they left. But I’m still a creep to the woman’s eyes. I don’t talk to the other kids, I say Hi back and answer them if they ask something.

But… I just don’t understand.

I’ve been getting driving lessons recently and after the first one the instructor dropped me off and when we were organising new lessons we just said we would meet at the same place. It’s outside a school.

We probably met there about 10 times at various parts of the day in a car with massive “Driver Learning School” stickers all over it.

A woman came up to me yesterday as told me how it was wierd that two men met there and how people were talking and how there were “weirdos” about who people thought were selling drugs and how we wouldn’t want anyone thinking we were “weirdos”.

I’m a large dude. I seem to get more scared of this at work.

I’ve been told I’m intimidating in meetings. I pay close attention to my tone and body language now.

I stare at the elevator doors with my headphones on, especially when a lady gets on.

When the kids charity uses our offices for events every few weeks, I go to a different floor to use a private bathroom so I’m not alone in a public bathroom with any kids.

I volunteer at cub scouts. No parent or scoutmaster (predominantly male) is allowed to take the children anywhere alone. Not even to let them play in the gym after the pack meeting.

A female colleague was leaving the company. I offered a handshake. She asked for a hug (which I gave). I told her that in a company with 60% women, you never assume a hug. She nodded and said ‘Fair point.’

I have a bad back. I asked for a place to lay down occasionally during the day for short periods of time. They told me to use the 'wellness room’. Which is built for and decorated for nursing moms. And it’s outside the women’s bathroom. I told them a 6'4" dude with a beard laying on the floor outside the women’s bathroom is not a good look. They agreed. I lay on the cold tile of the handicapped bathroom now.

All it takes is an accusation, even if wholly unfounded. The conversation will always be there. I make sure I don’t even put myself in that situation.


@directedbyzacksnyder first of all I would like to thank you for putting into words what I have struggled with.

In case anyone doesn’t know, Justice League director, Zack Snyder, recently announced that he would be stepping down from the project due to a family tragedy.

Snyder only announced this because knowing the internet he knew that if he had simply said he was stepping down, loads of bloggers and clickbait websites would have gone on to write inaccurate articles about how “Hack Snyder ruins the DCEU once again”, or “WB finally washes its hand of Zack before he creates another disaster.”

Over the years it’s become incredibly clear that critics and bloggers have used their opinion on Snyder to become nothing but massive jerks.

And in doing so not only have these bloggers, websites posted incredibly hurtful stories about Zack but they’ve taken it to a personal level.

Just yesterday I got into a huge argument with a Critic, who I once had massive respect for, because she decided to make a terrible joke about how she was completely confident that Zack Snyder hated his mother.

Look I understand that Zack isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, hey I consider myself a fan and even I don’t love all of his work.

But please, please, can we stop with the massive personal attacks on this guy. Snyder is a kind man who every single person who has worked with him has praised to the high heavens for being a gentleman. And many actress​ have said that if it wasn’t for him they would have quit acting.

He’s not a misogynist, or some Right Wing Ayn Rand obsessed psychopath, or some edgelord who wants to ruin your childhood.

He’s just a guy who has feelings just like us and that often gets forgotten about.

Right now Snyder needs some time to make peace with a family tragedy and a kind word could a long way. And if you can’t do that feel free to say nothing at all. You have already proven your character.