so help me god am i cute

What I think of when listening to the Heathers soundtrack
  • Beautiful: School sucks...nope never mind!!!
  • Candy Store: Bow down or get out Bitch!!!
  • Fight for me: Damn boy!!! You single???
  • Freeze Your Brain: Don't kill yourself, have a slushie instead!!
  • Big Fun: Parents are gone let's get wasted!! Wooo!!!
  • Dead Girl Walking: I'm pissed, horny, hot and you're cute! Let's do this!!!
  • The Me inside of Me: Ok, Bitch is dead... let's make her into a martyr!!(Aka Miss Fleming gets too self involved and helps them get away with murder.)
  • Blue: I'm soooo horny!! NO!!!
  • Our Love is God: I am God! We are god! We will kill them all!!! *V freaking out*
  • My Dead Gay Son: My son is dead, gay (shush), and so am I!!!
  • Seventeen: Please can't we just be normal, no more killing. Just you and me.
  • Shine a Light: Kids are dying, this is great for my career!!!
  • Life Boat: I'm a jerk, but there is more to me than that.
  • Shine a Light Reprise: Heather vs. Heather
  • Kindergarten Boyfriend: I had hope once, now it's gone.
  • Yo Girl: Run Veronica Run.
  • Meant to be Yours: Come on Veronica, we are meant to be! I just want to blow up the school!!! It's no big deal.
  • Dead Girl Walking Reprise: Ok, that's it!! I'm done with your BS.
  • I am Damaged: I'm too messed up! Wait no you're not!!! *boom*
  • Seventeen Reprise: I know everything has gone to hell, but let's try and be normal.
Cute Stuff

Imagine being the Salvatore’s Little Sister and Kai falling for you.

My first Kai fic! :) I am seriously procrastinating on my requests…

(gif not mine, credits to the owner)

“Come on, cute stuff, go on a date with me.” Kai said. You growled and sped to pin him to the wall. “Ooh… kinky, naughty girl.” He commented. “I will kill you.” You muttered through gritted teeth. “Just because I tried to kill your brother doesn’t mean you should hate me too.” He said. You threw him across the room, only for him to stand up straight. “If I get out of this room or even be able to actually kill you, so help me god.” You spat.

“(Y/n)!”

You heard your brothers scream from outside the house you were currently locked in with Kai, all thanks to his magic. You felt a surge of power course through you and you looked at Kai with an evil smile. “Oopsies! See you soon, beautiful.” He waved and before you can even speed to him, his disappeared. You screamed in frustration and then you heard the door being knocked down.

Damon and Stefan sped to you, Damon taking you in for a hug in an instant. You felt yourself being squeezed and you pushed your brothers off of you. “Are you okay? Did he hurt you? I swear to god if he did–” “Damon, I’m fine.” You said, sighing. “Where is he now?” Stefan asked. “Big brother, if I knew I would’ve killed him myself.” You seethed. Stefan rolled his eyes. “What did he do to you?” He asked.

“He obviously took me, locked me in here with him, but him being him, put a spell on himself so I couldn’t hurt him.” You answered. “What did he want from you?” Damon asked. You groaned. “He wanted me to go on a date with him.” You said, whining a bit.

“What?” They both asked in unison. “You heard me, he freaking wants me to go on a date with him.” You repeated. Just then, you felt unable to move your body. “That’s right.” You heard him. He walked to face you three and smiled at you. He went near your brothers and placed a hand on their shoulders. “Go on a date with me and I won’t hurt your brothers.” He tauntingly said. Your eyes widened and looked at your brothers.

“Yes! Okay, yes, I’ll go on a date with you, just –just let go of my brothers.” You quickly said.

Kai smiled manically and let go of your brothers. “I’ll pick you up tonight at 7?” He asked. You clenched your jaw and angrily nodded, he then once again disappeared.

You brothers looked at you and gave you worried looks but Damon had a teasing undertone. “Shut your face, Damon.” You grumbled. “I can take care of myself.” You said and walked out of the house, the two of them trailing behind you.

So dumb, so precious: Daehyun (Le Noir AU)

OMG THIS IS SO LATE! I AM SO SOOOOORRRRYYYYYYY!!! I am so behind in everything like UHG. Behind in school, behind in fees, behind in life, dear God someone help me TT_TT I’m so sorry this took so long. Finals week just came and slapped me across the face, but I am still deeply sorry patient Nonnie! Anyways on a happy not I just wanna give a shout out to a friend of mine lets_love_bap instagram account. If you love BAP and funny/cute things be sure to check her instagram out. Anyways I have to give my soul back to studying so peace! Sorry Nonnie that this wasn’t exactly what you wanted! I hope you forgive me for being a pervert…..

I really love your writings! + you’re the only one with requests open sob (which I’m really grateful for btw♡). Anyways, another Daehyun request for you! In which he gets into a fist fight because he defended y/n and tries to hide it from her (she wasn’t present) but she still finds out from whom you want. A little angsty + fluff(?) Thank you!♡

WARNING: SLIGHT SEXY CONTENT

Originally posted by zel0e

“Aiiish!” Daehyun let out a hiss as Youngjae dabbed his cut knuckles with a cotton balls soaked in isopropyl alcohol. “Can’t you do it gently?” Daehyun whined, attempting to reel his hand back from Youngjae’s iron grip.

“You’re lucky I’m doing this for you in the first place,” Youngjae sneered, tossing the cotton ball in the trash and grabbing some gauze. “Who told you to be an idiot and get into a fist fight? Huh?” Youngjae’s eyes went wide in a mocking manner before rolling his eyes.

“It wasn’t my fault those assholes were-”

“Hi boys,” Youngjae and Daehyun nearly jumped from their seat as you leaned on the couch, a small chuckle escaping your lips at their startled reaction. “What do guys got there?”

Keep reading

rinna-diabolik  asked:

While trying to find a cure for Subaru's condition, Rosi accidentally spilled another potion from Reiji's lab on herself. She has temporarily become a wall-punching tsundere >v>

Mun: I am dying. Help. Send the ambulance. I can’t stop laughing. someone call Reiji, he needs to revieve me xDDDDD They both are so OOC, it hurts my stomach due to laughter.


Rosalie: Oi, stop clinging. The heck, I am not a damn teddy bear.
Subaru: B-but Rosi. I just wanted to cuddle *pouts*
Rosalie: Geez, stop pouting. That’s so annoying. God damn.
Subaru: Please? *leans against her and blushes*
Rosalie: Tch, whatever! *props up her chin on her palm and looks to the side*
Subaru: Ah, thank you! You are so cute, when shy! *smiles happily and hugs her tightly*
Rosalie: I AM NOT SHY! *mumbles* god damn. Why do I keep up with this shit.


Subaru: I love you.
Rosalie: Hng! *looks away while blushing*

anonymous asked:

How would they respond to having a crush on someone they otherwise find terrifying (maybe the girl is very sweet or protective of them). P.S. You've done a good job by the way--stayed organized, diverse, & consistent when posting.

((Aaah thank you so much lovebug! (╯3╰)

I’ve never gotten a compliment like that before and I appreciate it so much hhnnn.))


Their crush is intimidating

2P!America: “She’s such a wicked bitch oh my god I like her so much can you help me???”

2P!China: “Awwww she’s kinda scary sometimes but she’s totally cute n’ sweet on the inside I swear.~”

2P!England: “Good heavens… She can be so cruel… However, she is brave, and I admire her so much for it!” ♥

2P!France: “The girl’s got a sharp tongue. I like that.”

2P!Russia: “She’s rude; so am I. What can I say? She speaks her mind and that is a good trait to have.”

2P!Italy: “…I wonder if she’s freaky in bed.”

2P!Germany: “Mmmh… This one’s a bad girl. What’s not to like?~”

2P!Japan: “I’ll bet she’s locking her true self away.”

2P!Canada: “Well shit. She’s kinda hot when she’s mad.”

2P!Romano: “Holy crap, I hate that bitch! …Is it weird that I kinda wanna date her?”

2P!Austria: “Excuse me, I have an important question. Do you think liking her makes me a masochist?!”

2P!Prussia: “She’s so mean… Why do I feel like this…?”

6

Haikyuu!! at Otakuthon 2015!

if you’re in any of these pictures, let me know so that I can tag you!! :D

The shadowhunter ships right now
  • Malec shippers: ! EEEE we finally got the malec kiss!What I time to be alive, everything is perfect and wonderful! :D *is dead from happiness*
  • Saphael shippers: Omg! simon is wearing Raphaels clothing! Holy shit they are so darn cute :o
  • Sizzy shippers: We are still hanging on, we neeeed more moments between simon and izzy!
  • Clace shippers: .....I am in so much fucking pain right now, god help us

otakoandreallife  asked:

YASSSS PRAISE THE LORD! So can i ask for a cute drabble with Akashi and his pregnant so?♡♡♡♡

“Are you certain that’s what you’d like?”

“Oh my God, yes. I need it. Right now.”

“Right now. It’s three in the morning. Are you positive?”

“Sei,” you grabbed him by the collar of his pajamas. “I am pregnant. I am huge right now and starving. Cut me some slack.”

Akashi’s lips twitched. He should be used to your mood swings by now but he still couldn’t help and find it amusing. How you could be so happy one moment and so angry the next. Not to mention, hungry. You were almost always hungry.

“Seeeii,” you groaned.

“Alright, alright. I’ll get the maid to prepare…that…for you.”

“Are you questioning my taste?”

“Sweetheart,” he kissed your forehead. “I always question your taste, especially when you ask for peanut butter and blueberry potato chips.”

“Have you tried it? It’s delicious. I made it a few years back.”

“How many years?”

Pause. “When I was five.”

He let out a laugh that was so un-Akashi, it surprised you. He pressed a soft kiss onto your lips again, “Alright. I’ll get it for you.”

“You’ll make it for me?”

His lips twitched. “You know I can’t cook.”

“Fine. I mean, a five year-old could but apparently you can’t.”

“Don’t start with me.” He shook his head and moved towards the door. “I’ll be right back.” Just as he stepped out of the room, you called out for him again. He popped his head in.

“Can you also add pickles to the mix?” You asked shyly.

He smiled, “Yes, I’ll do just that.”

I’m very frustrated now

why? because it’s been a very long time since we saw Sanji and I’m extremely eager to see him and his father, and his brothers, and ‘his fiancee’, and….

OMG! why am I panicking so much? is it because of the previous chapter which had so much plot twists, or…

FUCK!

ignore this shit right now and let me focus on this chapter now

I WANT TO KNOW THIS SECRET! AND THE HISTORY NOW! PLEASE!!!

what a pity….. but I think Oden made a right decision

what?

this sounds like Gintama!

yeah, Luffy! say yes to his request! I want to see Wano Kuni soon!

Luffy! You fucker!! help them for God’s sake!

P.S. Chopper’s face is so damn cute there

oh, shut the fuck up, Nami! no one acres about your silly addiction to money!

can anyone tell me why Oda is always killing every single mother in One Piece? Momo’s in so fucking painful situation and you make him an orphan? fuck!

firstly, I found Momo as an annoying pervy kid, but right now his character development is great!

Law is a true tsundere XD

Zoro, I love you!

GOD they are so sweet. Help me. I don’t want to fall for anyone again. Like ever. I am really better off alone and ARGH they are so cute and nice though!!!!! But WAY out of my league. They are so beautiful and kind and nice and bloody GORGEOUS and I’m….not

ME EVERYTIME ON TUMBLR.

Me: Today I will definitely search up something productive on tumblr and not that gay OTP and ship which ofc not gonna do me any benefit.

*Opens Tumblr.

*Spots ChanBaek on the dash, first thing.

Me: Oh god, they are so cute. ^^

*Scrolls down on the dash to find more Chanbaek.

Me: *squealing.

*Continues scrolling down the Chanbaek filled dash.

Me: Cute, cute, cute, cute. Ugh, Baek is so pretty and Yeol is so- *fangirling

*searches ChanBaek on tumblr.

*Finds more Chanbaek related posts, moments, memes, blogs, fanarts, edits.

3 hours later.

Me: ha ha ha. They are so funny and cute. Ooooh whats that?

*clicks on a ChanBaek video link.

*watches the video.

*watches more ChanBaek videos.

Me: Oh, so this is a trailer for this ChanBaek fic? I need to read it.

*Goes to the fic site and reads the Chanbaek fic.

*Reads more ChanBaek fics.

5hrs later

Me: OMG! This fic is so good and the author is so cool. Wait! She also have a Chanbaek blog on tumblr too. Oh shit I need to check it out.

*literally ends up back on tumblr.

Me: hmmm… Didn’t I came on tumblr today for some other reason too? I can’t remember it though.

*after a sincere thought about the reason for the whole 0.5 seconds.

Me: Oh well! Nevermind, Chanbaek is more important ~~(-_-)~~

EXO’s reaction to bumping into you in the halls

For xiugasm <3

Xiumin: “Sorry, I wasn’t careful. Are you okay?”

Luhan: “Excuse yo-… oh why hello there.” 

Kris: *gets flustered* “Oh crap what should I do? Is she ok? Oh my god what have I done?”

Suho: “I am done for. I have made a fool out of myself. She’ll never look at me again.” 

Lay: “I-I’m so sorry….” *bows at you forever*

Baekhyun: *puts on cute act* “Please forgive me.”

Chen: *too busy admiring to even help*

Chanyeol: *waddles over to help you*

D.O.: 

Tao: *flees the scene to avoid embarrassment*

Kai: “Are you ok? That wasn’t me btw, he did it…” *blames it on someone else*

Sehun: “She’s so cute omfg.” *stands and fanboys on the inside* “oH IM SORRY LET ME HELP YOU UP.”

Based on this prompt: “Oh my god you have a concussion stop trying to flirt with me.”
**********************************

“Am I dead? Cause you’re so pretty that you look like an angel.”

Sirius felt his cheek warming up when he realised that the man was pointing at him and everyone’s eyes were on him.

“Would you play to the doctor and patient with me?”

One of the other nurses giggled while the doctor smirked at him. Sirius felt his face catching fire.

The fact that the man was utterly cute and adorable didn’t help things. He had tawny curls, freckles and a slight overbite. Even being high on morphine and being slightly delirious made him look attractive.

Dr Shaklebolt diagnosed a concussion. He also gave him some something to let him sleep.

And of course Sirius was the one to help to give the treatment. He was treated to the whole chat-up session. He might have been enjoying it a bit to be honest.

“Your hair is so silky. Please marry me.”

“Could you lie down now?” Sirius asked him while trying to manoeuvre him into a lying position.

“Only if you lie with me.” Sirius rolled his eyes a bit and turned to roll some bandages and hide his enbarassment.

The next morning, Sirius was almost eager to meet Remus Lupin and his chat-up lines. He could feel the beginning of a crush even though he hadn’t met the man sober or at least not delirious from morphine.

Remus looked awake and conscious enough when he walked into the room. Though the man seemed to be avoiding his gaze and looked rather sheepish.

“How are you feeling this morning Mr Lupin?”

“Remus please. Fine enough” he replied to his lap.

Sirius was trying to quell his disappointment when Remus looked up suddenly with a determine a gleam in his amber eyes.

“I am really sorry I…harassed you yesterday.”

“Well I didn’t really mind it. I should be glad a cute bloke chatted me up.” Sirius replied with a wink.

He was pleased to notice Remus blushing slightly and tried to hide a smile.

The checkup was routine mostly and Sirius was almost making his way out when Remus called him again.

“Erm…you know. I meant it what I said yesterday. About you being pretty and all. Would you fancy a cuppa these days?"he finished, rubbing the back of his neck.

"You mean that?” Sirius asked and smirked when Remus nodded. “So you wanna marry me?”

Remus’ eyes widened comically and his face turned even redder. “I asked you that yesterday?!”

Sirius laughed and moved close to the bed. He rubbed his knuckles on Remus’ cheek and tried to not find the blush completely endearing.

“Yeah you did. Might even say yes to a gorgeous bloke like you.” Remus chuckled a bit at that.

Sirius grabbed a piece of paper and wrote his number. “Text me when you are out.” He kissed Remus on the corner of his mouth, lingering a bit and really left with a final wink. He was rewarded with a shy smile and pink cheeks from Remus.

whether intentional or not, Luke would be an annoying boyfriend; more often begging for attention with fingers against your skin or head popping up between you and your phone screen and typically his ‘love me! I’m funny and cute!’ brand of obnoxiousness was endearing but when you’re tired and stressed and his teeth are playful against your shoulder and your jaw between whines of ‘babe, i’m bored’ you can’t help but snap, throwing an exasperated, ‘luke I’m busy can you just give me five god damn minutes?!’ in his direction and like the big child he is he’d get up from the couch, mumbling a quiet ‘fine’ and walking away to sulk by himself and even though you’d immediately feel a little bad for snapping, you’d carry on reading until the irrational frustration in your shoulders had dissipated and it’s not until you retreat into the kitchen to start making dinner that you see him again and he’d push out an exaggerated sigh, making sure you know that he’s still annoyed and for a while the two of you are mumbled questions and eye rolls, neither of you willing to admit that you’re both overreacting, too proud to be the first to apologise despite the triviality of the entire situation so luke busies himself with a drink and you’d turn just in time to see the juice he’s drinking miss his mouth entirely, instead dripping orange down the white of his shirt, your hand flying to your mouth to stifle a giggle and his face would drop for a moment before he’d let out his own chuckle, his lips falling into a pout as he looked up at you and you’d shake your head, walking towards him to graze your teeth against his jaw, voice mocking him with a ‘babe, i’m bored’ before he’d roll his eyes and stop your teasing with a kiss.

Babysitter

requested

1282 words / chen 

I struggled to take my phone out of my pocket, I was currently makingbreakfast for my three year old nephew.


“Hello?”


Heeeey, baby.”


“Jongdae, why are you calling?” I asked, while trying not to burn the eggs.


I wanted to ask if you wanted to hang out today.”


“I’m babysitting my nephew, so if you don’t want to help me then I can’t.“

Keep reading

Gravity Is What Holds Me to the Ground

A couple magazines need pictures of me and my mother. We both hate having our picture taken so no such contemporary pictures exist. 
Let us go back to 1976. I am 18 months old. I am wearing saddle shoes, a diaper, a fucking cute dress, and ribbons in my hair. Deal with it. 

Tonight I gave a reading in celebration of Women’s History Month. After, a woman came up to me and thanked me for helping her see things differently. She said, “I’m 56 years old,” and I looked her up and down, sure, in a flirty way but mostly an appreciative, you don’t look a day over 35 way. She said, “Oh my god, you give me goosebumps,” and started fanning herself. I smiled and thought, “Yes, Ive still got it.”

Sometimes, those little reminders are nice.

I went to Australia which is similar to the United States but also very different. I am going to write about the trip for The Guardian. There were crowds like I’ve never had. I went on television, TWICE. I signed so many books my hands hurt. My dream of becoming a writer has exploded. Everything feels fantastic, as in, like a fantasy. 

I have five new books coming out in the next few years. W T F? FIVE? I didn’t dream big enough and now I am swallowing it all. But I want the books to be good. I want them to be better than what I have previously written.

It can also be exhausting. I’m on the road constantly. I am on the road too much. I give me all at events and then I am completely drained. So many people who have so much to say and I want to honor their time and their stories and I try. I worry that I don’t give enough to the person I want to give the most to. I need to find a balance and I will. 

An Untamed State is in the 2015 Tournament of Books and it has advanced past the first round. You can read the deliberation here

I want to write about certain topics, say, my past, without having to answer an endless litany of interview questions about it. Sometimes, it is deeply uncomfortable when someone is basically like, “So, about your rape…” I suppose you have to deal with that when you make certain choices but still. I’m trying to say something here. 

After Australia, I stopped in Los Angeles for meetings. At least, that was my excuse. I always make up reasons for going to that city and they are true but they aren’t the whole truth. “Meetings” in Los Angeles can mean everything and they can mean nothing. So many meetings, over so much time and progress is v e r y s l o w but maybe, someday, I will have exciting things to tell you about involving the kind of work that happens in Los Angeles.

I had a driver while in LA whose name was Melva. We got on very well. She shuttled me across the city to my various appointments and traffic on the 405 was insane and Obama was in town. She helped me find a pen engraver. I ate a macaron for the first time and I finally understand what that cookie is about. It was so hot, ninety degrees but it wasn’t sticky and miserable and there was so much sun and all those concrete highways stretching out in every direction and the water and palm trees and and and and…

One of my meetings was at a restaurant called The Ivy that I’ve read about in glossy magazines. I was excited but the restaurant was the most overrated place I’ve ever eaten at. First of all, the prices are insane. They are not expensive, they are in the stratosphere of absurd. I was not even paying and I was offended. Everyone in the joint seemed to be ordering salads so I felt an intense pressure to order a salad so I did and it cost like $28.95 and my soul ached because I hoped that at such a price point, the salad might make me fly. It did not make me fly. It was just a salad and a mediocre one at that. Dressing? What dressing? 

The place was packed with beautiful people wearing expensive clothes and expensive sunglasses. I don’t belong there but I was there so maybe I am changing the rules about where I belong. The plates were also ugly. Hideous ugly.  My lunch companions were fantastic. The iced tea comes with a lot of accessories including a stalk of sugar cane and it was excessive. There was barely any tea in the glass. When you leave, they give you a box of delicious cookies and that is a nice enough gesture but still, the restaurant is overrated or maybe I am just not their target clientele. When we left, we saw that the valet had parked one of our cars at a parking meter literally right across from the restaurant. Oh how I laughed. I love Los Angeles. 

I wish I could explain how that city draws me back over and over. Actually, I can explain but I won’t. Gravity is involved. We all have a center of gravity and sometimes that center is a place or a person. 

A hotel room, and I’m staring up at the ceiling and I see a bug. I hate bugs. It is tiny but it seems huge. I want to be macho or at least mature, you know, but I can’t and so she throws up a book, hits the bug squarely, kills it, and I am exposed for who I really am–a girl who is afraid of bugs and inexplicably has tattoos all over her arms like she is cut from much tougher cloth.

The thing is, that bug could have fallen in my ears or nose or mouth while I was sleeping and then a colony could have festered inside me. Those movies never end well so I feel like my caution was warranted. 

My body feels like a cage. I want out of this cage and intellectually, I know how to free myself but in practice, freeing myself is not easy. 

I am impatient. I am patient. I am so happy which you may not understand but I am. I am learning how to be happy even when everything isn’t perfect. Everything will never be perfect. 

Gravity is what holds me to the ground. I need it now more than ever. 

There are all kinds of cages, really. The frustrating thing about cages is that you’re trapped but you can see exactly what you want. You can reach but only so far.