so heartbreakingly beautiful

Shakespeare: writes pages & pages of sonnets about a man so heartbreakingly beautiful that he swears all beauty will die with him

Shakespeare: writes love sonnets about said man

Shakespeare: begs him to at least have a child as to not let his beauty go from the world forever b/c old bill thinks that would basically be a sin, a tragedy,

Historians: anyway this is William & he’s Straight

no one ever talks about bullets and it’s literally one of my favorite albums of all time gerard sounds so desperate and scared and all the guitars and drums seem slightly unplanned and that’s what makes it so heartbreakingly beautiful not to mention the lyrics which are unmatched to anything I’ve ever heard… it just makes me kinda sad that since it’s their first album it’s overlooked when it has so very much to offer

Dancing On My Own: Part 10

Pairings: Steve Rogers x Reader / Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: Brief Mentions of Sex 

Catch Up Here

Word Count: 895

Summary: Bucky Barnes never imagined himself falling in love with anyone, especially his best friend’s girl. Of course his plans were shot to hell when Steve decided to surprise everyone and propose to you on your birthday. Had he missed his shot, or would he be willing to risk both of his closest friendships in hopes of winning your heart?

Author’s Notes: Thanks for being patient! I always love hearing from you guys <3. Please let me know if you would like to be tagged.

Originally posted by fysebastianstan

Originally posted by blakemylove

Morning came too soon. Bucky opened his tired eyes to see you sleeping beside him. You looked so heartbreakingly beautiful as the sun cascaded down your back. He replayed the events of last night in his mind as he sighed to himself. He had royally fucked up. When he had awoken from his nightmare you had been the first thing he had seen. The relief of having you beside him overwhelmed him – causing his carefully built defenses to come crashing down. He had let his emotions get in the way… and god only knew what kind of damage he had done. He allowed himself one last lingering look before pushing off the bed and dressing himself before leaving to meet your dad downstairs to help with the preparation for your mother’s funeral.


In truth you had been awake when Bucky left the room. You had feigned sleep to buy yourself some time and to prolong the inevitable awkward morning after conversation. Once you could no longer hear his receding footsteps you turned on your back with a sigh. As you blinked wearily towards the ceiling you couldn’t help but allow your mind to drift back to the events of last night. The way he had looked at you – like he had been waiting for so many years for that moment. The way his lips felt against yours – soft yet firm – as his stubble scraped across your cheek. You had never experienced anything like it with anyone else, and you hated yourself for it. The problem was – you didn’t regret it – any of it, and that made it so much worse. You sighed to yourself again as you winced in response to your throbbing head. You had certainly had too much to drink last night, and your hangover was rearing its head with a vengeance. You couldn’t help, but think you deserved it.


“You there, son?” Bucky blinked in confusion as your father’s voice brought him back to reality. He had had a difficult time keeping his mind off of last night and everything that had happened.

“Huh? Oh… sorry,” Bucky mumbled – trying to hide how flustered he had become.

“I asked if you were okay, son,” your dad responded as he looked at Bucky. “Last night – are the nightmares back again?” Bucky had been open with your mom and dad from the first time he came home with you that he had occasional bouts of nightmares thanks to his time with H.Y.D.R.A.

“I… I had one last night, but Y/N…” his voice trailed off as his face reddened “She… she helped me,” he finished awkwardly.

“Have you told her… how you feel?”

Bucky set his eyes back to his work – avoiding making eye contact with your father at all costs. “Not in so many words, but I’m sure she knows,” he responded shortly.

The two men lapsed into silence for a time as they continued to prepare the house for the arrival of additional guests. After a while your father turned to Bucky and asked earnestly, “Does Steve know?”

The sound of the name caused Bucky to flinch. He had been trying to actively not think about his friend even after the phone call he had made the other night – undoubtedly causing further complications for himself. “No,” Bucky answered quietly as he turned to look at your father.

“I think things have maybe progressed further between you two than I realized. Listen son – I know how much Steve means to you and I know how much Y/N means to you, but at some point you have to decide what you want and what you’re willing to sacrifice for it. What’s love if not a leap of faith?”

“It’s easier said than done,” Bucky murmured to himself as he climbed the stairs to your bedroom.


Bucky had had every intention, upon entering your room and locking the door behind him, to speak with you – as much as he didn’t want to, but as he turned he caught a glimpse of you through your cracked bathroom door. It was only for a brief moment before you stepped out of view, but his breath seemed to hitch in his throat as he took in the sight of your bare back. He sat on the edge of your bed with his hands balled up in his lap as he listened to the sound of the water cascading off your body in the shower.

Logic told Bucky that he had already made a big enough mess of things. That he needed to talk to you. That he shouldn’t act further until he did. But he couldn’t help giving into the pull that caused him to shed his own clothes and walk with heavy feet to the bathroom. As he entered the shower hesitantly you turned around, almost as if you had been waiting for him. “What is it?” he asked softly as he caressed the line between your eyes with his thumb. You smiled at him sadly as you brought your lips to his. You didn’t want to talk – to address anything that had or would happen. You just needed to be there with him – to know what you felt the night before had not been some misplaced dream. “Are you sure?” he asked breathlessly as he leaned his forehead into yours. All you could manage to do was nod.


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Black Sails 4x5

This episode was quite the nerve wrecker for our couple. After two episodes with no dialogue, they definitely made up for it here.

Thoughts:

- Silver seems to see the handwriting on the wall. He’s starting to truly doubt whether they can win this war.

- Silver is madly in love and it’s clear he wants to take his Bae and head out before shit really hits the fan. He wants to lead his men, but it’s starting to become clear that he doesn’t want to do that at the expense of a potential life with Madi.

- Silver was floored by Madi siding with Flint over the gold. Madi had her reasons. She explained to him that he didn’t see what she did at The Underhill Estate. Therefore, he can’t possibly understand how the alliance is fractured. Silver told her that “she sounds like Flint” and it seemed to again back Billy’s claims of her “being consumed by Flint”.

- Silver asking Madi “would I be enough” was so heartbreakingly beautiful. This woman is his world and now he’s scared that she doesn’t 100% feel the same way. I think she does. That pain she felt when she thought he was dead proved that. The way she suffered proved that. However, she is a Queen. She’s serving her people’s needs and that need is freedom. At the moment, I don’t think she can contemplate her own happiness when her people are dying in a war she led them into. That being said, I think Ruth’s words will be prophetic here. That scene wasn’t dropped in for no reason.

- Israel is really the right hand you need. He repeated what Madi had already told Silver. You will have to choose between Billy and Flint. This was important because it shows that Madi isn’t trying to cause discord. Israel stated to him that most of the “folks ain’t loyal” and he’s right. He gave him what he didn’t want to hear, but he needed to hear it.

- Billy brought this on himself. He sacrificed the slaves, would have sacrificed his 20 brothers, Max and even Madi. You can’t really feel sympathy when a double crosser gets double crossed.

- Silver and Madi’s makeup in the end was everything. I’m a fool for a good forehead kiss and Madi seemed to be back in “tether” mode and remembering that he needs her too.

This episode was tough. Our faves aren’t as aligned as they normally are. They had their first official spat, and maybe stepped out of the Honeymoon stage a little, but War can do that. However, in the end, I’m convinced that Silver will stop at nothing to keep his love safe, even if it’s from her own desire to save her people. And that Madi, will see the wisdom in Ruth’s words as well. Sometimes Living to fight another day is winning.

Back In His Shadow

Request: Hi! Can I ask for a Steve/Reader oneshot based on the song Jolene by Dolly Parton? I just listened to the cover done by Pentatonix and it’s SO heartbreakingly beautiful. Please make it angst…with a happy ending. Thank you so much!

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 2,827

Steve and Bucky were sparring in the gym. They’d lost track of how long they’d been going at it. Both of them had to lose their t-shirts from overheating and wetness. Bucky was even forced to pull back his shaggy hair into a messy bun. They were covered in sweat and if it weren’t for random music playing, all they’d be able to hear is their heavy breathing.

“Thought I smelled something when I walked in…” A voice called out from the entrance. It was followed by an adorable giggle.

Steve instantly turned his head, knowing that voice anywhere. He beamed as he saw Y/N walk into the gym with a bag and her workout clothes on.

Bucky smirked at his best friend. Steve couldn’t stop looking like a lovesick puppy every time Y/N was in the room if he tried.

Steve instantly ignored Bucky’s presence now that she was in the room. 

Keep reading

Dancing On My Own: Part 6

Pairings: Steve Rogers x Reader / Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: Mentions of Loss

Catch Up Here

Word Count: 1241

Summary: Bucky Barnes never imagined himself falling in love with anyone, especially his best friend’s girl. Of course his plans were shot to hell when Steve decided to surprise everyone and propose to you on your birthday. Had he missed his shot, or would he be willing to risk both of his closest friendships in hopes of winning your heart?

Author’s Notes: Sorry for the delay! I’m still fighting crazy fatigue lately and it’s been impacting my productivity. Thanks for be patient! I always love hearing from you guys <3. Please let me know if you would like to be tagged!

Originally posted by in-perfectenschlag

Bucky sat on your bed beside you as you both watched the movie. He mulled over the moment that the two of you had had. He could tell – you felt it too, but he found the timing to be inappropriate – if there was ever an appropriate time to be in love with your best friend’s girl. He loved you too much to take advantage of your feelings during a moment of weakness. He sighed to himself as you snuggled your head into his chest. You had fallen asleep by the time Harry had gotten to Hogwarts, but Bucky was afraid of waking you.

“Y/N?” he whispered softly, but the only reply he received was the sound of your soft breathing as you slept. “I’m glad I’m here too,” he continued before planting a light kiss on the top of your head.

To his surprise you smiled at the gesture and mumbled, “I love you,” before resuming your soft breathing.

Bucky knew you were asleep. He was certain of it because he knew you would never say those words to him – at least not in the way they had slipped off your tired tongue. He sighed deeply as he stared at the ceiling. Even now – just hearing the words – caused his heart to race and his palms to sweat.


You woke with a start. You couldn’t remember what you had been dreaming about but you focused your mind on steadying your breathing as your heart continued to race. You reached out blindly into the dark – looking for Bucky – but came up short. As your fingers met the empty blanket you sighed with disappointment. Bucky’s presence had been comforting since you had received the terrible phone call, and you found peace in his nearness. As you peaked through your lashes you saw is disheveled form crumpled on the couch. His mouth was slightly parted and his hair was in all levels of disarray as his chest rose and fell to the tempo of his breathing. Once again you found yourself unable to tear your eyes from him. You had never been like this before, and you weren’t really sure why you had so much of a pull towards your friend now. Maybe it was because of everything that had happened… Maybe it was because Bucky was the one person you could always rely on. You bit your lip at this thought. It wasn’t true of course. You had Steve, your fiancé. Steve would do anything for you, and at that thought you felt a wave of guilt again.

You pushed off the bed with a huff – wrapping one of your afghans around your shoulders as you quietly left the room. You needed some time to process – alone. The house was full of the sounds of its sleeping occupants as you strolled quietly down the hallway and down the stairs to the front door.  The Kansas air was heavy with moisture – beckoning an early Summer day – as you walked amidst the twilight. You wanted to reason out the things that had happened in the last 48 hours, but you simply couldn’t. Instead you found yourself longing to speak with your mother. You walked aimlessly through the early morning haze as you continued to think until you stopped suddenly. You had somehow managed to find your way to the tree house that you and your siblings had once spent countless hours in. Of course your dad had replaced bits and pieces of it throughout the years to accommodate your nieces and nephews, but it was still more or less how you remembered it. It was the perfect place to think.

You climbed up the tree and, with a sigh of relief, found the inside of the tree house to be adorned with various blankets and pillows. Now that you were away from everyone you felt quite tired again. Maybe it was the walking, and the internal debates, but as you laid your head down on one of the piles of pillows you certainly thought there was more to it than that. With your mother gone you weren’t sure how you could navigate your way through life. Even after moving to New York you had found solace in the times you spoke with her. She had always been honest with you, and you longed for that honesty now. Too many things had happened too soon, and the thought of trying to process them made you choke for air. As you closed your eyes a part of you wished Steve could be with you, but for some reason that thought made you feel even worse.


Bucky stretched stiffly on the couch as he strained to open his eyes. Sleeping here had not been ideal – but it had been the respectful thing to do. He didn’t want to take up any space in the house as it was now teeming with your relatives. He sat up– rumpling hair hair with his hands. As he looked towards your bed his heart skipped a beat. You were gone. He wasn’t sure why he felt so worried suddenly, but he knew he needed to find you. He pushed off the couch and made his way through the house. When he noticed that you were no where to be found in the he made his way outside. Thunder rumbled in the distance with the threat of an early morning storm as he followed the small tell-tale signs of your presence. And that’s how he found you some time later as you slept in the mass of pillows and blankets in your childhood tree house.

As he gingerly climbed up the wooden planks Bucky laughed. He had never had something like this as a kid – just alleyways and rusty stairwells. He could almost see the younger you whisking yourself up into it – away from your imaginary foes – like a well guarded princess. As you came into Bucky’s view he stopped. He wasn’t sure what it was about the sight of you sleeping in the fortress of your childhood that he found so heartbreakingly beautiful – maybe it was the way the early morning sun cascaded over your face, or the peacefulness that you radiated as you slept. He made his way beside you – careful to not disturb your rest and laid on the other side of your pile of pillows.

As he watched you he couldn’t help but reach out to brush the hair from your face – eliciting a smile from you. Before Bucky could even react you laced your arms around his neck and brought your lips to his. The action caused Bucky to freeze – he wasn’t sure how to react or what to do.  The feeling of your lips moving against his was intoxicating. Excitement ran wildly through Bucky’s body as you continued the action. He felt as if he had grabbed ahold of a live wire and was simply unable to break contact. As you deepened the kiss his body relaxed. In the back of his mind he knew he should stop, but as he wrapped his arms around you he reasoned with himself that you wouldn’t be kissing him if you didn’t want to. He longed for the moment to stretch into eternity as he entwined his fingers gently into your hair. This is what he had been dreaming of for years, and it was finally happening, consequences be damned.

And Everything was fine – until you opened your eyes.


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Day6 as Princes AU

Jae

  • the one who involves himself in JYP Nation’s political and social issues 
  • the social ambassador bc he’s good at A LOT OF LANGUAGES ( he studied abroad okay he’s a smart one) that’s why King JYP sends him to other nearby kingdoms to strengthen their alliances 
  • but the first thing Prince Jae does when he arrives ar other countries is to ask for food like lobsters, saying that the food would act as his welcoming and parting gifts. 
  • he’s not even guilty about it 
  • aCTUALLy he does more harm than good bc he gets into arguments with other people from different countries, including well respected and feared rulers. 
  • he successfully pisses them off but it’s nothing serious cause they always find him amusing and funny, (not many princes out there can be this sassy and funny and attractive at the same time, boy) 
  • invents the word “sweg” back in the day 
  • the people eventually get used to his sass and they even enjoy it 
  • which makes Jae proud, 
  • everyone in the country either lowkey hates him or is jealous of him 
  • hE DOESN’T EVEN CARE THO BC HE’S BUSY ENOUGH AND HE’S GOT A LOT OF WORK TO DO 
  • “I’m a prince I have work to do” 
  • “No Jae, you’re just shooting heart eyes at Brian,” Said, Prince Sungjin, 
  • Has the best relationship with Prince Brian as they both studied abroad together and they both lowkey bully Prince Wonpil together 
  • and they both love the youngest of them, Prince Dowoon 
  • the one amongst the others who interacts with the people the most, you can always find him on one of the streets, talking and laughing with the people
  • or he’s playing his guitar, singing along with the crowd 
  • doesn’t act like a prince, as he wonders himself how he even ended up born as one 
  • the most down-to-earth prince with top sense of humour you could only find in the whole JYP Nation

Sungjin

  • the one who’s the most responsible out of them, 
  • probably the one King JYP trusts the most, 
  • handles a lot of issues within the nation as he tries to keep everything in order and makes sure everything is alright 
  • has to take care of his four other brothers, and to him, this is more tiring than handling nation issues 
  • nO ONE EVER LISTENS TO HIM, THEY ALL MOCK HIM AND TEASE HIM 
  • gets annoyed at their pranks so he ignores them 
  • only succeeding in making Prince Wonpil whines even more at him, demanding attention
  • “Why won’t you talk to me?~~” whined, Wonpil 
  • “…” Sungjin and Jae’s same response for poor wonpil
  • he has a lot of responsibilities so he gets stressed a lot and singing is the only way for him to release his stress
  • the one prince who likes, loves to sing 
  • HIS VOICE IS BEYOND AMAZING, AND EVERYONE LOVES HIS VOICE 
  • always sings at festivals, with the boys, 
  • and he gets absolutely happy when he sees people enjoying their singing
  • he would even dance occasionally, when he’s feeling up to it, twirling and flailing around the ballroom dance floor, 
  • causing people to hide their smiles and laughter 
  • AND THE BOYS TEASE AND MOCK HIM EVEN HARDER FOR IT 
  • but he doesn’t mind bc he enjoys it, so why should he care
  • when he’s walking on the streets, someone would always request for him to sing and he would always do so 
  • bc he’s the kind to never refuse a chance, an opportunity to sing 
  • and everyone is impressed of his singing
  • so he would sing, along with the crowd, until Jae comes running with his guitar 
  • so they would start all over again, singing again and grinning
  • until Dowoon and Wonpil come running along, yelling that they want to join as well 
  • they couldn’t find Prince Brian tho, who’s probably passed out somewhere, sleeping as usual 
  • the prince who has the most amazing voice you could never find anywhere but in JYP Nation

Brian

  • a real, actual breathing, annoyingly perfect prince
  • the one who actually seems like he could do anything, and everything, 
  • it’s like there’s nothing he can’t do 
  • he can sing, dance, play instruments, speaks different languages, devilishly handsome features, devastating smiles, a hot delicious body, 
  • (do i even need to list more?? i can bet that no one would have any trouble imagining brian as a prince) 
  • the one who’s the most popular 
  • receives flowers, love letters and chocolates daily, 
  • which he gets a little shy about it, but he doesn’t mind bc that means he gets to eat chocolate and probably a lot of other food that he gets everyday 
  • is mostly seen hanging around with Jae, mostly they eat or talk about food together 
  • or he’s nearby at wherever Prince Dowoon is 
  • everyone in JYP Nation knows how he adores Dowoon
  • probably the busiest prince too 
  • he’s almost always at the library, studying, with piles of books in front of him 
  • and a bulky bag filled with food next to him 
  • he always sneaks food in bc he couldn’t care less 
  • “Studying needs energy and we gain energy by eating.” He’d always say that
  • writes sappy bittersweet poems and he likes sharing it with other people 
  • bc he wants to hear people compliment him 
  • he sings them out as a song too, turning the words into lyrics, on the rare occasion when the five boys are all gathered together, singing
  • bc he’s always off sleeping, eating, or studying somewhere. Most of the time, he sleeps 
  • but when he sings, it’s PURE SIN. EVERYONE IS IN AWE BC OF HIS SINGING AND HIS WHOLE CHARM 
  • rumour has it that some girls even fainted 
  • everyone loves him and his sappy poems bc it’s so heartbreakingly beautiful 
  • gets vvvv happy and teary-eyed when people sincerely tells him that they enjoy his poems and singing 
  • BUT when he’s not off somewhere doing his thing, he’d probably gang up with Jae and bully Wonpil together (poor wonpil) 
  • or the both of them would get all heart eyes and smiley faces at Dowoon
  • the most prince-like Prince who’s going to keep torturing you bc of his perfectness

Wonpil

  • the cutest prince omg 
  • he gets shy when people compliment him for his good looks, or manners, or his voice when he sings, 
  • but he appreciates it, a lot 
  • he gets really happy and smiles very widely 
  • WATCH OUT FOR HIS SMILE BC IT SHINES BRIGHTER THAN THE SUN BUT ITS OKAY CAUSE YOULL BE BLESSED 
  • gets happy and excited everytime when he gets to sing 
  • turns into the cutest puppy ever
  • if he had a tail it would be wagging like crazy it might actually fall off 
  • he’s the type that would get sad too if you get sad
  • and get happy too if you’re happy 
  • everyone loves him bc he’s just so nice and kind??
  • except for Jae and Brian who likes to bully him, ESPECIALLY JAE
  • but ofc, our kind-hearted Wonpil doesn’t even mind 
  • bc he gets their attention anyway 
  • follows Dowoon around most of the time 
  • bc he adores the younger boy, a little too much (ofc everyone loves dowoon right?!)
  • which annoys Dowoon a little bc Wonpil’s basically glued to him 
  • hangs out with Dowoon at the nearest farm 
  • and he always tries to get close to the animals like the donkeys, sheeps, rabbits, dogs, 
  • but they usually ignore him, which makes him pout 
  • they just like Dowoon more, somehow 
  • (iTS OKAY WONPILI)
  • plays the piano and is a genius at it 
  • everyone loves having him play 
  • anything he plays sounds like a masterpiece (it probably is) 
  • the type that’s always humming a tone softly no matter what he’s doing
  • gets absolutely excited and nervous everytime him and the boys get to sing in front of a crowd 
  • he gets a lot cuter when he’s nervous and excited
  • like he’d bounce lightly on his heels, he’d purse and pout his lips, he’d puff his cheeks 
  • but let me warn you, he turns into your great sin when he opens his mouth to sing 
  • those stares, and that voice, pure sin and pleasure 
  • the cutest prince with the brightest smile that you’ll definitely fall in love with

Dowoon

  • the youngest prince 
  • and no doubt, the one everyone adores and loves 
  • he’s a pure precious baby,

  • everyone is vv protective of him 
  • he’s also very kind, 

  • loves animals a lot
  • he’s almost always at the nearest farm/barn, taking care and playing with the animals

  • names the animals in a very savage but cute way 
  • for example, he names the chickens as “Jae’s kids” 

  • he loves dogs 
  • always has a dog with him everywhere
  • gets shy when people compliment him
  • the tips of his ears turn red

  • but he’s lowkey proud of himself
  • everyone else is very proud of him tho
  • no matter what he’s accomplished
  • gets annoyed when wonpil sticks too close to him
  • “Can you please get out of my bed?”
  • he doesn’t mind but he hates it when wonpil finds his way into his bed
  • tries to kick wonpil out
  • but wonpil never stops trying
  • so eventually dowoon gives up
  • and just share a bed with wonpil
  • has an amazing ability of just hitting random objects and turning it into some sort of beat or melody
  • he could be eating and he randomly starts hitting his chopsticks on his bowls
  • rhythmically
  • and when the boys catch on, they start to sing
  • and that’s how a random concert suddenly happens
  • everyone’s having a lot of fun
  • and he’s the happiest at the moment
  • the most precious prince and you’ll absolutely fall in love with him and his charm
breathes deeply

yall i’ve fallen completely and utterly in love with PastelClark’s ‘Spilling Like An Overflowing Sink’ 

it’s so heartbreakingly beautiful and so far i just love everything about it it makes me ache and i’ve cried 12 times today bc of this fic is2g go read it it’s AMAZING

[especially if you love gender non-conforming lance + langst + hance friendship that makes you cry]

anonymous asked:

"How could you?!" "Because I love you, Donna. And I'm tired of pretending I don't!" 7.09/7.10

. Edited .

He feels his shoulders slump, the moment he sees her reflection bounce off of the glass panels, rounding the corner as she sashays towards his office.

She looks angry. 

Scrap that, he thinks, she looks livid. Made only the more evident by the sight of her looking so heartbreakingly beautiful, and noticeably deathly from head to toe

He had watched her all night, glide around their chosen venue in a swooping black gown, with spines of black lace reaching up her chest like the young branches of a tree, creeping along her pale skin, with the highest slit up her leg - that he’s ever seen her wear before - and her shiny cooper hair rippling down one side of her neck and popping against her devastatingly red lips. 

His groin had ached at the mere sight of her, contradicting the silent treatment he had given her over a week prior. A gift for the previous week of her own bitter silences.

But after tonight, he feels it all break away from him as she stalks into his office.

He thought he’d escaped this kind of a situation. 

He forgot how habitual he could be, sometimes…and how good her memory was.

How could you?” She fires at him, the colours ripping from her voice and streaking out into the large, slightly darkened room of his.

He looks tiredly at her, placing his empty glass on the window ledge, as he regards her presence.

“Donna,” He starts, his voice solid as he tries to concentrate on her kohl rimmed eyes only.

Keep reading

nothing is lost, only changed

This takes place right after the scene in 02x07 “Faith” where Claire and Jamie agree to return to Scotland 

—–

Jamie’s head had lay in Claire’s lap for some time now - still kneeling before her, his face pressed against her belly, hands tightly gripping her hips, tears soaking the fabric of her gown as she gently rubbed the back of his neck.

So many times she had held him so and he had marveled at the miracle that was - that still was - their daughter. He had never seen her - and had no other way to mourn her.

“Let’s get you cleaned up.” The tears were gone from Claire’s voice, and he raised his head, eyes bleary from exhaustion and emotion.

“I think I ruined your dress.”

Her lips curved in a small, tentative smile. “It doesn’t matter. Come.”

He eased back and slowly rose, groaning at the strain and pull of his cramped muscles. Then extended one hand to help Claire rise. She rested her palm in his, and as he pulled her up he brought her knuckles to his lips. And held them there, eyes locked on hers. Watching her. Worshiping her.

She squeezed his fingers and finally he released, heart so full as she led him to their bedroom, helped him sit on the bed, and quickly departed to ask Suzette for a basin of hot water.

Jamie sat in the quiet voluptuousness of the master bedroom, seeing everything as if for the first time.

The heavy draperies. The paintings on the walls. The silver candlestick holders. Claire’s blue dressing gown sloppily thrown over one chair.

This wasn’t his room. This wasn’t his life.

He shifted his feet. His heel felt something solid under the bed. So he knelt, lifted the silk sheet, and saw the box.

The apostle spoons.

His heart clenched, fresh tears welling.

Oh, Claire. Oh, God, Claire.

With trembling hands he gently lifted the box and sank to the bed, carefully opening it on the bedspread.

Twelve spoons to feed a bairn that would never come.

He was no longer angry - no longer vengeful. Because those emotions could so easily mask the one emotion he so desperately did not want to feel.

Loss.

He had lost so much - so many people - in his life. But why did this loss crack his heart wide open?

The bed sank in front of him. He blinked, looked up, and saw Claire, so heartbreakingly beautiful.

“I couldn’t bear to look at them,” she whispered.

He swallowed. “Aye.” He found what he had been looking for, and gently lifted it from the box.

“I want to leave this for her, when we go visit.” His voice sounded like it was a thousand miles away.

Her fingers were cold as she took the spoon. She squinted at the apostle on top - and Jamie watched her chin tremble.

“How can you transform so much pain into something so…so *sweet*?”

“Because I love you, *mo graidh*. You give me strength to feel what I’m too cowardly to feel on my own.”

He closed the box, gently took the spoon from her hand, and edged closer to her on the bed, framing her face between his hands.

When had she gotten so thin? So pale? He could see almost every vein, every capillary, blood racing beneath her alabaster skin.

“Do ye feel me giving you my strength, Claire?”

She nodded.

“And do ye feel yerself giving your strength to me, then?”

“Yes,” she breathed. “I do.”

A beat. She held his eyes, refusing to blink through the tears - terrified to sever this precious connection.

“This is how we will survive. We are neither of us whole, alone. It’s too much for one person - ”

“But not for two.”

He smiled slowly, sadly, tracing the curve of her lip with his thumb.

“I love you more than anything. You know that, aye?”

“Aye.”

She kissed his finger. He bent his forehead to hers. Sharing breath.

—–

When she had finally composed herself, Claire squeezed his hand, rose, and quietly stepped over to her vanity. She pushed away the pots of cosmetics and other fripperies Louise had bestowed on her right after their arrival, gently picked up a handkerchief, and carefully returned to Jamie’s side.

Carefully she lay the folded handkerchief on Jamie’s knee, and pulled back one end.

A beam of light pierced through the window, illuminating strands of impossibly fine copper-colored hair.

Jamie’s heart leapt to his throat, afraid to breathe.

“Mother Hildegarde thought we’d like to have this - it’s most of the hair she was born with. In my time we’d have taken prints of the baby’s hands and feet, but the nuns didn’t have anything for that.”

He touched the unbelievable softness with the tip of one finger. “This is hers?”

Claire nodded, afraid to meet his eyes for fear of losing herself anew in her grief. “Yes. I don’t know what to do with it - but I can’t part with it. I look at it every day - it’s part of her. Part of her that we can always have with us.”

Jamie gently, reverently, folded the handkerchief and took both of Claire’s hands in his.

“Look at me, please.”

She did, afraid to see pain - but elated to see joy.

“Thank you for the gift of our daughter. The most loved little girl who ever lived.”

“But - ”

“Dinna disagree wi’ me. She was alive. She *is* alive, here, with us now. We canna ever lose her, as long as you and I love her, and remember her.”

Feeling. So much feeling. Sorrow? Guilt? Joy?

Relief.

Suddenly the strength left her body, and she took solace in Jamie’s outstretched arms.

—–

He relaxed his back against her front, tilting his head as she scraped the razor over his chin.

“Don’t move - I don’t want to nick your skin in any way. I just got you back - and I don’t feel like mending any new scratches.”

She pulled away the razor in time for a laugh to rumble through the freshly-shaved column of his throat.

“Hold still,” she hissed.

For a split second they were back - there was no pain, no grief, no overwhelming sense of *loss* - not while he tried valiantly to keep from moving and she focused diligently on her work.

“When was the last time you had a beard like this?”

He paused, waiting for the razor to complete another sweep down his throat.

“Probably that winter when I lived rough - raiding cattle. Afore I was hit on the heid wi’ that axe.”

She repositioned his head and squinted in the pale midday light filtering through the heavy curtains of their bedroom. His whiskers were so fair that it was hard to see without the direct sunlight.

“But I certainly didna have a pretty lass such as yerself to help me tidy up,” he continued, worming one hand in the general direction of her hip. She gracefully darted away from his touch and scraped away at a patch she had missed right on the edge of his jawline.

She smoothed more lather onto the side of his cheek. “I certainly hope not. I don’t mind the scruff - but you look. I don’t know. *Wild* with it.”

He waited for her to scrape away the final bits, then rub his face with a damp towel.

“All done,” she said softly. “Now I want to look at you.”

He dropped the towel and turned to face her, skin stinging a bit in the cool air.

“There’s my Highlander,” she whispered, raising one hand to twine in his unruly curls.

“Your servant, madam,” he replied.

You were the kind of person that made me want to write poetry for hours in a notebook that would forever hold my secrets. But you weren’t like the ones with the smile or light eyes, you were different. You had the dark heart and mysterious eyes. You were the kind of person that looked just like my poetry, so heartbreakingly beautiful.

sikkeanki  asked:

Hi Asil! I sent you a beautiful finnish song's translation on Skype. The link to the song is with the translation :) this was mostly Shu's idea, but we both think you might like it!

You guys are so sweet? That you took the time to translate, so I could understand??? Gosh, with what do I deserve you all? Also the song is so heartbreakingly beautiful, I`m in tears.

Here are the translation and the song, give it a go peeps!

midnight-rose1216  asked:

Reread Loki's Song for the millionth time.. I will never not cry because on my god Tony is just such a beautiful human being. He suffers the loss of his soulmate many times and the one time he knows Loki will have to he doesn't want that for him. Ugh! It's so heartbreakingly beautiful 😫😫

…the woman smiled again. “Do you believe in soulmates, Anthony?”

“Without a doubt. Absolutely. My mate, my husband, is the best thing to ever happen to me.” He replied firmly. “I would be nothing without him.”

“It is hurting you, knowing you must leave him behind, isnt it?”

Tony looked away, a wave of sadness washing over him. “I would never want to put him through the pain of losing a soulmate.”

“But he did it to you. Several times.”

“That doesn’t matter. I could handle it. I don’t want him to have to.” Tony said stubbornly.
********************

So sad. This part is where I started crying as I was writing it because I felt like that last sentence just described tony perfectly. In this fic he has gone through so much shit just from CACW much less his soulmate, but in the end he would still rather shoulder all that pain by himself than have the man he loves experience any of it and ugh it’s so beautiful!!