so fckn much

Bellamy Blake was chained to a rock and beaten bloody by his sister, Octavia.

A season later, Bellamy is chained (again) and pulling on said chains, his wrists hurting and bleeding to get to (save) his sister, Octavia.

I’m —

Bellamy Blake has the biggest eff heart don’t fight me on this.

I love you but you hurt me so fckn much. Idk what to do. You were the only “thing” that hold me here. It hurts to much. It’s like I mean nothing to you. I’m not good enough. - not pretty I’m ugly and useless. There is no hope.. no hope that you love me anymore. -bye.

Originally posted by dinkotheking

Originally posted by busbys-baptist-blog

Originally posted by i-am-my-own-drugs

my aesthetic: looking at a gif of yoongi and being able to seeee his pronunciation

my aesthetic: min yoongi lyin and cheating in every game or competition for absolutely no reason

ssssssigh. i was doing really well last year. i remember only needing to see my psychologist once every 3 weeks, and even then i didn’t have much to say. i hardly ever threw up from anxiety, i ate multiple meals a day, i was walking heaps, i was better than i’ve been since i starting going downhill when i was like 10, ffs. i know this is temporary, and im not going downhill all over again - it’s just for a while, just for now while i’m getting my grip, but it’s so frustrating. my psych was so happy with me and now im gonna go back on tuesday and be like ‘welp guess what all is Fucked’ and im so annoyed w/ myself for wasting time when i was getting BETTER damn it !!! ngnghHHGHHHGH sorry this is so garbled its 7am and i havent slept oh goodness

anyway,,, this is temporary. i will start getting better again. i need to stop expecting recovery to be a nice smooth gradient and start preparing better for these things. also, i mean, i did change a lot this year. i got a bunch of jobs, then lost a bunch of jobs, messed up a lot and learnt a lot, started a completely different degree at a completely different uni, and honestly.. uni’s been a lot easier now than it’s ever been, so that’s a plus. i can start seeing my psych next week, singing will start up again, soon i can go back to my choir, my jobs are down so i have more time… i can already see that things will start getting better. just gotta hold out for a bit

nonspoilery s2 thoughts

binge watched the ENTIRE fckn season straight from 3 am est to now

and holy fucking shit.
it was so good. it was SO. GOOD. ITWASSOGOOD!!!!!

sun’s season arc was absolute KILLER. it’s like everything you wish for come true. i mean, all of the arcs were good because of course they were, but SUN IN PARTICULAR. doona wrecked every scene she was in, and there were some scenes that just FELT SO GOOD TO WATCH because YOU KNOW it needed to happen for her, like damn.

also, i love our original cluster so fckn much.
they are perfect precious beingS who DESERVE to be happy dammit.
AND I CAN’T BELIEVE that actually happened at the end of the season.
all i can say is, next season is gonna be A+ times a million, ya’ll.

on a more serious note, the entire show and what it stands for, is so important and so beautiful and just like capheus says in the xmas special about his fave movie, i think it has that sense of “believing in people”, and i think that right now, more than ever, we need that. we need a show like this.
i’m so, so glad we have one.


anonymous asked:

this isn't really fluff but zack merrick just seems like such a soft guy like if you hugged him u would kinda just squish into him like hugging a pillow

i think about this every day of my life honestly i want to hug zack merrick so fckn much

send me zack fluff yall

anonymous asked:

Imagine an angsty AU where it's the Zombie Apocalypse & most people in London are dead/zombies. But Joe and Caspar are survivors and they're trying to survive. But on a supply run Caspar gets bitten and asks Joe to kill him, but Joe can't do it. They've both have had huge crushes on each other for the LONGEST time but have been in denial until now. Joe realizes that he loves Caspar when he has to kill his best friend before Caspar turns into a zombie. Do you have any other angsty headcannons? ;3

this just bREAKS MY HEART. ahh its just so good??? like im so in love with apocalyptic aus and this is so amazingly painful im dying. honestly, i would love to write a fic about this but who knows if that’ll ever happen, i definitely have some headcanons though 

  • when the whole zombie outbreak occurs, joe is out doing meetings and stuff and caspar is home and sees it all happening on the news. he calls joe immediately and tells him to get home. nOW. 
  • theyre trapped in their flat for a couple of days and so they pack bags because theyre sure they’ll have to leave suddenly at some point, and they dont speak much, or sleep much, and they hide in the kitchen, on the floor with their backs pressed against the oven and their hands pressed over their ears, whenever the screaming outside gets too loud
  • its not very long before theyre forced to leave their flat, its during the night and theyre both awake, just sitting in joes bedroom, when they hear the front door burst open upstairs. they leave through joes bedroom window and run down the ruined streets of london without turning back 
  • they dont stay anywhere for very long. sleeping in a different abandoned building every night. they dont even say anything about it, but the very first night they lay down right next to each other. because its cold and theyre scared. and then every night after that, neither of them can sleep unless theyre pressed against the others side
  • one of them gets hurt. bad. and it scares the shit out of the other, who watches it happen. theyre both shaken, and the one who isnt injured patches up the other’s injury with his trembling hands and tear-blurred vision. the other watches him, mind hazy with the pain, and he attempts to crack a joke. to try and make the other feel better. to try and make them both feel a little more human. its a terrible joke, but suddenly theyre both smiling, despite the fact that their eyes are red with tears and their hearts are hammering in their chests, and its at that moment that they fall in love with each other. 
  • but, like you said, joe doesnt realize that hes in love with caspar until he has to kill him (fucking ouch). caspar has probably already realized, and come to terms with the fact that hes in love with joe at this point
  • caspar doesnt say anything about getting bitten bc he doesnt want to scare joe, but he also just doesnt want to admit it himself. it doesnt last very long, and when he tells joe, joe is devastated. he doesnt know what to do. so he tells caspar its all going to be ok. but its not. and they both know what needs to happen
  • cue the angsty love confession, a kiss and a lot of tears
  • cue also: my death 
  • and caspars