so excited to drink this man

It’s Not Gonna Suck Itself

Pairing: Jensen x Reader

Word Count: 1,290

Summary: The reader sends a naughty text to the wrong person.

“What the…no way, dude!” Jared bursts out laughing, practically falling off of his leather chair.

“What?” Jensen asks with furrowed brows, wondering if it’s worth getting up from the couch.

“Wow. I can’t believe she sent me this.” Jared grins widely, glancing back down at the text from you.

“Sent what? Who?”

Jensen grows impatient, his best friend still hasn’t answered him and it’s annoying as hell. He sighs dramatically then moves towards Jared, waiting for an answer.

Keep reading

// THE!! BEST!! GIFT!! EVER!! IS!!
M E M E S!!!!
kind of nsfw, at least implied.

{ Valentine’s day special }


- He’d gotten the whole shebang, like every cheesy gift imaginable. Everything. Who is this man, why is he like this.

- You just slowly slide an envelope over the table– he gets really excited and starts to open it with a huge smile on his face; you have to bite your cheek to contain yourself.

- When he gets it open, it’s literally pouring out valentine’s day cards with memes on them

- ” Wait what is this? Spell lana backwards? … OH”

- He’s laughing while he’s opening them because he didn’t know what he expected but not this?

- “ Looks like someone’s getting cremè bru-laid toni– M C ”

- Keeps them because he thinks they’re funny and just so you. Trust me, he’ll go through with everything that’s written on those cards if you know what i’m dayin wink wonk


- Honestly don’t give it to him out front like hide little sticky notes around the house for him to find

- He’ll be at work two weeks after valentine’s day and he just finds
“ you’ll be making MY kitten purr tonight“ WITH A PICTURE OF ELIZABETH THE 3RD

- Calls you and asks how many of these you made because he finds them at random, he found one in the oven like?? when did you have time for this

- He recognizes V’s ugly writing on a few of them and he’s going to fight that man for helping you with this


- He was so so scared for valentine’s day– what if you didn’t like his gift? He just went with what Jaehee told him to get and rolled with it.

- He’s stuttering and nervous, you slide him a card. incognito. If you had sunglasses, they would have been worn.

- You got him a video game!! And he’s excited, but confused when there’s no disk?? it’s just cardboard with something written on it

- “ the only thing you’ll be playing with is me tonight. ”



- she’d have none of your bullshit honestly

- She saw you making cards and she just cannot believe this she runs whenever you chase her with them in hand

- “ damn girl, you optimus fine ”

- S TO P

- “ let’s get together and have some shrex because i’m not ogre you ”

- N O

- “ id let you in my swamp ”



- oh look at that you both had the same idea

- He makes his hand made memes into paper planes and sends them to you via flight through the living room

- “ let’s bop bop bop ur top off ”

- of course you HAVE to send one back I mean it’s just common courtesy!

- fucking looses it at
“ ravioli ravioli give me the dickioli ”

- this goes on all night until the living room is COVERED in these cards

- poor saeran is surrounded by your sins when he wakes up look what you’ve done you’ve soiled him


- V is the sweetest on valentine’s day okay he gets you roses, gives you massages with nice vanilla candles all around, ( he’s a god with his hands trust me trust me) kisses, chocolates, wine, he’s basically your servant for the day and you over here givin him some memes? smh who are you

- no but seriously, he would think it’s the cutest thing. especially handmade, look at your creativity! what a nerd

- hey he can spice things up too– He’s not stale, he’s a cool kid too MC. But his memes are wholesome with some sexual innuendo but mainly wholesome

- “ You take my breath away ”

- Most sexual has to be
“ Ill turn you on! ”
on top of your laptop, he’s so cute and blushy when you find it


- he’s concerned for your wellbeing because you’re laughing so hard at the stack of valentines in his hand

- “ I think you’re eggstaordinary?? I want to see your hard drive— MC what is this EXPLAIN”

- He’s laughing too because he honestly can’t believe this you worked so hard on these

- He loves you so much his heart hurts because of it— you’re so silly and goofy and it makes him so happy? but these are terrible who taught you how to meme? let the master show you how it’s done ~

Neighbours (Peter Parker x Reader)

Request: I love your writing! You’re so talented. Also can I request a Spider-Man where when they where young and peter had a crush on the reader, but they moved away, now they are back and like cute fluffy stuff? Please and thank you // by @littlesistersalvatore

A/N: I’m going to do a part 2(might even turn this into a series, I don’t really know, but I think this can be a nice start to something), so that’s why the ending is so open. Hope you enjoy nonetheless! I’m imagining Peter being 20-21, more or less, by the way!!

When Peter had been told by his aunt to introduce himself to the new neighbours, he had expected them to be an elderly couple. They had just moved into the house in front of his and his aunt had baked cookies for them, although she couldn’t introduce herself to them because she had to work and as she always said, ‘’cookies are supposed to be eaten when they have just been baked.’’
He didn’t know why he had expected them to be old -probably because everyone in his building was older than forty and the only person who was younger than that was a seven year old who hated him.
Now Peter was standing in front of the door, a plate full of cookies in one of his hands and ready to knock with the other. He knocked softly, not really eager to meet the people whom he would have to see everyday from thereon. Peter imagined the many scenarios that could happen -they could be rude and tell him to leave, they could be mad that Peter was bothering them, or they could simply not open the door to a stranger.
Just as Peter was about to leave, he heard footsteps walking around the apartment and tripping over things.
‘’I’m coming!’’ a voice yelled.
Peter was surprised -the person sounded like a girl, probably his age. He started growing more nervous by that fact -if he was already a mess with old people, he was even more of a mess with girls his age.
He didn’t know what to do -should he quickly turn around and leave the cookies at the doorstep, or should he man up and introduce himself properly?
He didn’t have time to decide(although he would most likely have chosen the first option, and he knew that). The door finally opened and it revealed a young girl, her hair up in a pony tail and an old oversized t-shirt covering most of her body.
‘’Peter?’’ the girl asked, her eyes wide open. ‘’Oh my God, I can’t believe it’s you!’’
Peter didn’t understand at first -why did that girl know him and why did she look so familiar. It was then when he realized -she was the girl he had been madly in love with for most of his life and who had moved away the day after he had finally built up the courage to kiss her.
‘’[Y/N]?’’ he softly asked.
The girl nodded and smiled, taking the cookies and putting them on an unpacked box, taking Peter’s hand as well and pulling him into the apartment.
‘’It’s been so long!’’ she exclaimed. ‘’Four years, right? Oh my God, this is so exciting. What are you doing with your life?’’
Peter didn’t know what to do. All the feelings he had took so long to bury four years ago had awoken and his heart was jumping in his chest.
‘’Uh, nothing exciting, I guess’’ he said.
‘’I can’t believe it’s you’’ she continued. ‘’I’ve missed you so much.’’
He laughed softly and looked at her, trying to decide his next move. She realized and walked to the kitchen, looking back at Peter for a moment.
‘’Do you want something to drink?’’ she asked him. ‘’I think we have lots to talk about.’’

Bon Soir [Lafayette x Reader] Part One

Description: You, an American patriot from a loyalist family, catch the eye of the Marquis De Lafayette one night at a tavern. After your first night with the enigmatic frenchman, you realize how turbulent life can really get in a time as turbulent as this. 

Warnings For This Chapter: Smut, alcohol, mild swearing, and mild Lams, where I could slip it in ;) 

Notes: So, there will be five parts to this story. It will, if we’re being honest here, be updated probably once or twice a week until it is finished. This story is a mix of Hamilton’s characters and actual historical stuff, and there will also be lots of appearances from the rev set in this fic, so brrrah, brrrah!! Enjoy. 

||Part Two||

It’s a beautiful night in the colony of New York, the moon full and the usual chill in the air slightly warmed. Besides it being a lovely night, it was also quite rowdy- but during these turbulent times, you couldn’t expect less from the Northern colonies.  

You pull your cloak tighter around your shoulders… it’s really not a night to be out for a lady, but you couldn’t care less. Your family still clings to the proverbial olive branch, one of the less popular voices of loyalist reconciliation. You’re a patriot, through and through, and any chance you have to escape your frankly shameful homestead under an anonymous family name at night to “cavort” with those who share your views on freedom, you take.

Slipping down a dark alley with the hood of your cloak pulled up, you find your way into the even rowdier Fraunces Tavern. Looking around, you smile. Men clinking their sloshing drinks together, shouts and jeers at the king tossed around liberally- this was the beginning of a revolution, and you’d be damned if you missed it.

“You lookin’ for a good time, honey?” some guy with a heavy Boston accent asks you from the table next to the door, and you turn to him.

“I’m looking for a drink, and whatever good time I can derive from that.” The guy still stares at you, waiting for a follow up, so you decide to win even more favour by voicing your views. “Fuck the king?”

The entire table bursts out in cheers and pounds their fists and mugs down repeatedly as you smirk and saunter past them. You get to the bar, and ask for a Sam Adams, before turning around and surveying. To answer the drunk man’s question, you aren’t actively seeking that sort of good time, really… but, nights like these were full of exceptions.

“Here you are, miss,” the friendly bartender nods to you, then pauses, “I’ve seen you in here a couple times now, and I don’t recall your name.” He looks genuinely confused. “Who’s your husband?”  

“I’ll let you know once I find one,” you wink, and cross the tavern to occupy a booth. Just as you’re lifting up your skirts to sit, the door crashes open, and in come four very loud young men.

“What time is it?!” one yells, and the other three yell back, “Showtime!” while cackling and slapping each other on the back.

You roll your eyes again, imagining all the fights they were sure to start tonight. The bartender seems to know them, and pours four ales for them as well. Snatching up his drink, the short one with the ponytail and goatee marches right up to the table in the middle, getting up on it and chugging half his mug.

“To the revolution!” he finally bursts out with, and almost trips off the table. The large one with the beanie catches him, shaking his head with a grin, and the second shortest one with curly hair and freckles joins the talker with a close arm around his shoulder.

“Now this is the place to be, amiright boys?!” freckles shouts, taking a long drink.

“Oui oui, mon ami,” another voice chuckles, and your interest is immediately peaked. A frenchman in the colonies? The excitement of these taverns is incomparable, and it is exciting to say the least to hear someone from so far away- you know a little of the language, or what you had learned as a girl.

You watch in quiet admiration as a tall, athletically built man with dark hair tied up in a bun and a close trimmed beard steps out, carrying two mugs of ale. He hands one to beanie man, and plops his own down on the table. “We must tell the king casse toi with our war effort!”

“We will, Laf,” beanie assures, “But first? Horses.”

“What?” freckles and goatee both say at the same time.

“Corsets,” beanie laughs, rubbing the back of his neck, “I meant corsets.”

“Hercules, you are an idiot,” Laf deadpans.

“I’m the most mature one here,” Hercules shoots back.

“Easy, when tes amis are Alexander Hamilton and John Laurens.”

Hercules lets out a booming laugh, and is soon joined by Laf’s own charming snicker. Alex and John are too enamoured with their own private conversation to notice much.

Your eyes train on Laf. If he was french, he must have a longer name than that… you’re determined to know it. He was undeniably a charmer- he was handsome, dashing as a prince, and very stylish. With the words he had uttered earlier, you found it safe to assume he’s as passionate about American independence as you are.

You make an excuse to walk by.

Heyyy there,” goatee (Alexander)? calls, swivelling his head to look at you.


Hercules lets out a low whistle as you turn to face them. “I don’t mean to be too forward, but madamn.”

"What the ever loving merde is that supposed to mean, Hercules?” Laf’s face scrunches up, and Herc just shrugs.

“Works on most of ‘em.”

“I’m Alexander Hamilton, bastard, orphan, son of a whore,” Alex jumps up, grasping your hands, and you can see the gears in his slightly drunk mind turning. “So I’d love to flirt for like, a really long time because you’re pretty and everything, but there’s a revolution to plot-”

“-And drink to!” John adds.

“-And drink to, as my beautiful lover Jackie just piped in and waaait, I’m probably not supposed to say shit like that in a tavern full of guys who will probably have me castrated for it, but hey, we die like men, right?”

“Yo, um, sorry 'bout him,” John blushes with a slight slur, coming over to guide Alex back to his seat. “He gets- *hic*- chatty when he’s tipsy.” You just laugh, letting them know it’s no big deal. John doesn’t seem very interested in you romantically or sexually, only greets with a good natured- albeit tipsy as well- smile. Hercules gets up to introduce himself.

“Hercules Mulligan. I’m Irish.” He drops his voice down to a whisper. “That’s kind of my thing.” Laf gets up to hip bump Hercules out of the way, take your hand, and press a kiss to it. You blush deeply.

“Bon soir, belle mademoiselle. I am Paul Yves Roch-”

Heeere we go,” Alex slurs.

“-Gilbert de Motier de Marquis de Lafayette,” Laf finishes with a glare to his friends, then turns back to you with a gaze that could only be described as… lust ridden?

“Plaisir,” you reply in french, and his eyes widen, his entire body straightening like an arrow in excitement.

“You speak my mother tongue, cherie?!”

“Only a little,” you confess with a timid giggle, “I’m not French, monsieur Lafayette, only acquired some words from my studies.”

“Gorgeous and intelligent,” he flirts, “A lady after my heart.”

“Handsome and bold,” you volley back, “A man after mine.”

“OHHHH SHIT!” John shouts, and Alex begins to laugh.


“Not you two,” Laf growls, and John and Alex tumble over each other watching you both. Hercules just rolls his eyes, and downs his drink.

“Care to drink with us?” Lafayette offers, outstretching his hand, and you happily accept. Hercules gets up to grab you another beer, and slides it over to you. John begins to chug his second, and you smirk, taking it as a challenge. Downing yours to the last drop, you’ve finally earned the respect of Hercules Mulligan as he bangs on the table and shakes his head.

“You are getting better and better as the night goes on,” Laf whispers, and you laugh.

“Is that the alcohol talking?”

“On the contrary, cherie, I am still on my first… though I may be thinking with something other than my mind,” he alludes, and you feel a shiver run through you.

He is very attractive.

“What brings you to the colonies?” you ask Lafayette conversationally, and he takes a sip of his ale.


“You’re here for congressional duties?” you feign ignorance, though you know how to identify a congressman- powdered wigs, brightly coloured jackets, and stuffy mannerisms. Nothing Laf possessed.

“Ah no, mademoiselle. War is imminent- that is the talk here and overseas. I will fight as one of you for your glorious country!”

“Ayyy, to our fighting frenchman!” Alex lifts his mug, and John raises his as well.

“Very brave,” you murmur, “I wish I could serve in the continental army.”

“You can still do your part at home,” Laf assures, taking your hands excitedly, “You can make gunpowder, you can sew uniforms, you can…” he suddenly hesitates, lowering his eyes, “Pray for and write letters to your husband.”

“Why does everyone in this tavern assume I have a husband?” you tease, and he looks back up.

“Forgive me. No one has, eh… courted you yet?”

“Courted me? Oh, quite a few. I have yet to accept,” you giggle, “I suppose I’m just as hard to please as the next young lady.”

“I, too, have very specific tastes,” he nods, and bites his lip, “Mais, it would be very nice to have a woman to boost my morale on the battlefield.”

“Wait… hey, what’s your name?” John laughs, “We didn’t even ask!”

“Oh,” you blush, eye contact with Lafayette broken, “Um…” You sigh. It shouldn’t be any trouble to give them your real name. “(y/n) (y/l/n).”

Everyone repeats your name, raises a glass, and drinks. Lafayette smirks at you a moment longer, then drinks as well.

As the night wears on, you start to become even closer with the group. Stories are passed around, drinking games are played, and talk that would’ve sounded like treason in many other colonies flowed freely from your mouth with the boys. As the night begins to dwindle with the candles burning down close by, hands begin to wander, skirts began to lift a few inches, and blood begins to rise.

“Raise one last glass to freedom,” John finally says, somewhat soberly, as everyone stands up, “Something they can never take away.”

“No matter what they tell you,” Herc adds, placing a hand over his heart.

“Raise a glass to the… five of us, here tonight,” Alex nods, looking to you, “Our cause is a great one.”

“King George will never stand a chance,” you finish, and everyone downs their last sip and sits back down. With that, Laf takes your hand, rubbing a thumb over your knuckle. You turn to him, and take note of how he’s staring at your lips. Danger and adrenaline course through your veins, imagining just what he could be picturing right now. Practically in his lap by now, you shift your hips a little, and he sucks in a sharp breath.

“It is getting late, ma cherie,” he murmurs, obviously holding back, and begins to stand.

“It is,” you nod, moving to brush your fingers along the hem of his blue coat, and grasp your fingers firmly in his lapel. His eyes dart to meet yours, dark and warning, and his fingers find yours as he lets out a wistful sigh.

“(y/n)… I am a gentleman, and you have had too much to drink.”

“I assure you,” you grin, turning the tables and ghosting a kiss over his knuckles, “I have not.”

He spends a long time staring at you, debating mentally. You can feel him hardening in his breeches under you, but despite his uncomfortable expression and beading sweat, he doesn’t make even the slightest nudge to meet your grinding movements.

“Are you quite certain?” he finally asks, interest beginning to spark again in his eyes as he realizes that maybe you do want him like this.

“All I want is to feel your lips on my neck,” you confirm with a whisper in his ear, and he slots his large hand around your wrist, standing you up. The three others don’t even question it as Laf leads you out the back door, and the once the heavy wooden door closes, you’re both free. He immediately presses the front of you right up against the brick, pulling your hair aside and grazing his teeth over the back of your neck.

“Then, if there are no reservations on either of our parts, I will give you everything you need,” he growls, and continues his attack on your neck, showering kisses up and down. You flip around so that you can face him, and he pins you back again, opening up the neck of your dress just a little more for better access.

Lafayette’s gaze is hungry. Your excitement is known to him as he reaches under your dress, unbuttons your underclothes and realizes you’re already wet for him.

“So eager,” he groans, “Such an eager little kitten, desperate for her papa, hm?”

“Oh,” you sigh, his words sending pulses down to your core. He pulls your underclothes off, but as his long fingers are about to breach you, he pauses.

“You… have been touched or taken before, yes?”

You bite your lip, look around, and nod shyly. If word of that got out around here, you’d be off the market, as it were…. not that you particularly desired to on the market, but that was a different matter entirely. His face blossoms into a grin, and he lifts your legs up to wrap around him.

“Hold onto me, cherie, do not let go,” he murmurs, and once your arms are secure around his neck as well, he uses one hand to unbutton his breeches. You can already see the outline of his large cock, and once he has everything undone, he pulls it out.

“Monsieur, you’re so big,” you whine, and he gazes at you, licking his lips.

“We can make it fit, ma cherie,” he whispers, “Spread your legs a little wider for me… that is it, kitten… like that.”

You keen under the pet name, and he positions himself at your entrance before finally pushing in, groaning together with you as you tighten around him.

“Oui, oui, yes…” he breathes, “That is good… so good for me…” He sucks his lip between his teeth, and after a few seconds, begins to move, nudging you back against the wall with each deep thrust. He’s very large, so he has no trouble hitting that spot that drives you crazy, but he makes it even better when his fingers find your clit; Laf has a different approach than most men do, though- the select few you’d been with (if they make the effort to find it at all) rub with harsh, rough pushes… Lafayette massages you in slow circles, making you moan for him.

Leaning forward, the intensity between you increases as your foreheads meet, lips drifting close to each other and parting, almost kissing but not for minutes at a time. The teasing was getting to him, and he finally surges forward, breathing in your breath. You give his bottom lip a feisty bite, and he smiles, drawing away.

“You are a true northern belle, mademoiselle (y/n),” he mumbles, panting, “You are not like other ladies.”

“Oh, on the contrary sir,” you reply, “I simply don’t bother with the false customs. I say, fuck tradition, and fuck anybody who wishes to advise me otherwise.”

“There is a revolution on because of Americans who share your general mindset, ma chou,” he grins, and kisses you again.

As you both begin to race toward your climax, his thrusts increase, and you’re soon being pounded into the wall, legs tight around his ass and cries being muffled in his blue coat.

“Please… ah, Laf….”

“(y/n), so perfect, j’aime votre parfum…”

As he whispers your name, you hear voices, and turn to see two men walking by the alley on the road, in hats and coats. They sound southern.

“What if th…th-” you gasp, and Laf strokes your cheek.

“They will not see us, it is too dark. Besides, why would anybody pay attention to a stray kitten, begging in an alley, like you?”

“Ah,” you throb again at his dark laugh, and he shrugs.

“Also, the alleyway behind a tavern is where all the drunkards stumble out to vomit. No respectable man or woman wants to see that.”

“What an arousing image,” you scowl, and lean in for another kiss.

“You are so beautiful,” he mumbles against your lips once you part, and licks a line up your neck to just below your ear; you’re losing yourself to the pleasure. “Do you think you can come for me, ma (y/n)?” Laf rasps in your ear, stroking over your clit fondly, and you nod with a little whine, crying out his name softly as he slams in particularly hard. Circling his hips to guide you through a long orgasm, he lets out a little gasp of his own after you’ve finished. As you shake and pant his name, he sets you down carefully before quickly pulling out and taking himself in hand, jerking frantically a couple times and coming like a shot against the brick wall. Your name falls from his lips a few times like a prayer, and soon, you’re both sated and exchanging lazy tongue kisses, tasting each other’s mouths in the night air.

It’s chillier than it was earlier. You should get home before your one of your sisters or father notices you’re gone.

“When do you leave to join the ranks?” you ask, staring into his eyes. He does up his buttons precisely, patiently and one at a time.

“Very soon, I assume, cherie.”

“How very childish of me, but… what you said, about having someone to look out for you…”


“Will you…” you look down, embarrassed, and take off a ring on your pinky finger. “Remember me over a couple beers with your friends?”

His eyes light up, and he presses a long kiss to your cheek.

“When I wake up and when I fall asleep, (y/n).”

You smile a little. “Thank you for your service.”

He kisses your hand one last time. “If it takes fighting a war and, eh…” he leans in to your ear, brushing your hair back, “getting better acquainted behind a tavern to meet, it will, most certainly, have been worth it, ma chou,” he smiles back.

You dance and sigh your way home, ignorant of every redcoat who gives you a second dirty look. With men like the Marquis de Lafayette and his friends leading the troops, those bastards’ll be back home where they belong in no time.

BTS: Reaction to their girlfriend being pregnant

Jin: As you were eating a bag of pretzels and watching Jin play Mario Kart you thought to yourself, wondering when the best time would be to tell him. As you spaced out, slowly chewing on a pretzel, you didn’t notice Jin turn the TV off until he sat on top of your feet. You looked up at him in complete silence, and before he could ask what’s wrong, you spoke.

“I’m pregnant.” You said bluntly, shocking the man in front of you. He stared at you with a loss for words. Slowly he smiled and breathlessly laughed.

“Yah, don’t mess with me.” He looked so excited, like a little boy catching his first baseball. You scrunched your nose, grabbing his hands and putting them on your tiny baby bump. How could he not notice before? He just thought you gained a little weight! 

Originally posted by taejinmin

Yoongi: He was working late in his studio again tonight, so you paid him a visit with 2 small coffees. You walked in and set the drinks down before you hugged him from behind, slowly enough so you didn’t startle him. He didn’t budge, but he smiled. 

“What are you doing here?” He asked quietly. You turned his chair around to face you and sat on his lap, kissing his lips gently. He softly chuckled against your lips and repeated his question before kissing back.

“I have a confession.” You said with a light blush and a soft smile. He just raised an eyebrow and waited for you to continue. “I’m…” You played with his hair, something you knew made him feel relaxed. “..pregnant.” You finished, spoking in a gentle voice because you were slightly nervous to find out how he’d react. He stared at you with wide eyes, pink cheeks, and slightly parted lips. 

 “I think, I can live with that…” 

Originally posted by notjustaphase

Namjoon: Today was the day he came back to you after 3 months because of their tours. Your belly wasn’t poppin, but it was big enough to tell, so you were gonna just play it out until he realized. When the doorbell rang, you quickly opened it and jumped into the arms of a man you missed entirely too much. His hands rubbed up and down your back, and they got slower as time passed.

“(Y/N)…” He pulled back and grabbed your shoulders, looking down at your belly. You looked up at him with innocent eyes, batting your eyelashes and waiting for him to say something. “Did you gain weight?” He asked. Not that he minded, but he was shook since you were a person who was determined to get/stay in shape. 

“Joonie.” You giggled and put your hands on your hips, giving him a look. He furrowed his eyebrows, but slowly his face changed into shock and realization. He started laughing.

“Seriously? I’m gonna be a daddy??”

Originally posted by apgujeon

Hoseok: You were in the dorm with Bangtan, excluding Hobi. You were all planning together-a way to surprise Hobi. It was his birthday, and also the day he’d learn he’d become a father. There were many cute ideas that came across, but some of them required more time-something you didn’t have enough of.

After the best birthday party of his life he brought you into his room, locking the door as he hotly kissed you and backed you up towards the bed. His hands made their way to the hem of your shirt and he pulled it off. As he looked down, getting ready to praise your body as he always does, he tensed up. He looked at the paint on your tummy that said, “Baby on board!” Taehyung helped you write it out. He looked at your face with big eyes and a huge smile. 

“Nuh-uh…” He couldn’t believe it. When you confirmed it with a nod, he started screaming and jumping around. He ran out of the room and into the main area, dancing around in front of all the others out of excitement. “I’m gonna be a father, I’ gonna be a father” he sang proudly.

Originally posted by helendrv

Jimin: Never have you been so scared in your whole life. You were in the middle of a very heated argument with your boyfriend Jimin. You felt like he was gonna leave you all alone, holding his baby. This wasn’t the way you wanted to tell him, but you feared if you didn’t tell him, you’d lose him.

“Jiminie I’m pregnant.” You said through your tears, putting your hands on your slightly bigger stomach. He snapped his head towards you with an angry glare, but slowly a smile grew on his face.

“Baby, is that why you’ve been so moody..?” He slowly walked towards you and put his hands over yours. “Ok, let’s talk this out…” he spoke in a more gentle voice now after he understood why you were acting so weird. He couldn’t be angry with you now.

Originally posted by minspink

Taehyung: You and Taehyung were trying for a baby the past couple of years. You knew how upset he was because he wanted a baby more than anything, but he would act like everything was ok. But just today you found out you were pregnant. After the past few days of experiencing morning sickness you decided to get a pregnancy test. Immediately you drove to BigHit, and walked right into their dance room. 

You sat down behind Taehyung’s sitting body. He was stretching after the long day of practicing dances. You hugged him from behind, and he smiled big. “Hey pretty lady.” He leaned his head back and kissed your lips gently. “What are you doing here?” He questioned and rubbed his thumb over your knuckles. 

“Tae I found out something really cool. Wanna hear?” You ran your free hand through his damp hair, being used to him being all sweaty. You’d have full on make-out sessions after a concert or practice, so you didn’t mind the sweat by now.

“What is it?” He hummed and looked at you through the mirror.

“We’re having a baby.” You said with the biggest smile. Quickly, he turned around to face you, grabbing your hands and squeezing them. You have never seen his eyes get so wide so fast. 

“Really?” He started to get all teary eyed. You just giggled and nodded, wiping his tears. He grabbed onto your cheeks and kissed you lovingly.

Originally posted by bwipsul

Jungkook: You gently tapped your fingers on your small baby bump. You were a little sad, since Jungkook left the apartment looking sad. He knew you were sick, so he made you stay home instead of going to his concert tonight. But he didn’t know WHY you were sick. When he came home, you had a little surprise for him laid out, and you slept in your shared room.

“Mmm Chinese…” He saw Chinese take out food left on the counter with a fortune cookie on top of the box. Being the rebel he is, he ate the cookie first. He hummed happily as he chewed on it and read his fortune. His expression changed quickly and his heart jumped to his throat. 

The fortune read, “Your girlfriend is pregnant.” He quickly-not thinking of food anymore-ran to your room. He sighed when he saw you sleeping on your side in nothing but underwear. You were facing him so he glanced at your tummy. Sure enough he saw a small unfamiliar bump. He knew your body quite well, and that wasn’t there a week or 2 ago. He sat on the bed next to you and ran his fingers through your hair, softly chuckling. 

“Parents…” He tried to stop his smiling but he couldn’t. He never really thought too much about having kids until now-now he was thinking of scenarios and names for both boys and girls. He didn’t realize how loud he was being during his mini fanboy session until he woke you up. “I’m sor-” before he could apologize you grabbed his collar and pulled him into a sweet kiss.

“It’s ok daddy…”

Originally posted by theking-or-thekid

The Question

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Warning: Swearing, I have a mouth like a sailor, I’m not sorry.

What happens when Steve’s got something up his sleeve, but he’s acting weird. To top it off you run into your ex, who only shifts the night from confusing, into what in the actual fuck? Can the night be salvaged or is will this get the best of you and Steve?

@chrisevansthedoritobastard   @holahellohialoha  
@almightyunnie @imamotherfuckingstar-lord
@iwillbeinmynest  @letsgetfuckingsuperwholocked
@goodnightwife  @irepeldirt
@yourtropegirl  @bellejeunefillesansmerci
@buckyb-avengers  @winterboobaer
@mrhowardstark @rileyloves5
@ria132love @mystery94
@marvelfandom-stuff  @tequilavet

“Steve?” You shake his hand that was laced with yours, you stop walking looking at him, your eyebrow cocked at him.

“Huh? Sorry.” Steve shakes his head coming back to earth.

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Signs of Paradise

Originally posted by nochuie

A/N: Okay, but Mark’s voice in Paradise (you know what part I’m talking about) makes me think about…things that will be mentioned in this fic.

And just to give you a vivid setting for the club. Imagine the set from Girlsx3 and then the garage(?) from Never Ever, then it’ll make sense.

Originally posted by jackseunie

~Admin Allie

Y/N, get off of your ass and get dressed.” Your friend Nora walked out of the bathroom and was dressed in cute shorts with a plain white crop top on. She looked at you as you sulked on the couch in the suite and shook her head at you.  

“But why? We’ve only been here for a few hours and I want to sleep.” You had no reason to be so sleepy. You had gotten a lot of sleep the night before your flight, during the flight and you even started to doze off once again before Nora was fussing at you about getting dressed.  

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My Basty Bear

A/N: Hey guys! In celebration of my blog reaching to over 100 followers (author’s mind is blown), I decided to write out this one shot! I wanted to post another one I made of Sebastian Stan, but since this is a bit special, I made a different one. I hope you guys enjoy it! (I apologize for any grammar mistakes in my story) 

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x Reader
Warnings: Language, angst, fluff
Word count: 6,300
Summary: Reader has a habit of coming home late because of her love for painting. Unfortunately, that also starts to raise Sebastian’s suspicions of her habits. 

★ ★ ★

The music blasts through my earphones as I move the messy sponge along the canvas in rough dabs. I dip the edge of the sponge into the black paint before blending the colours into the canvas. I hum to the music, bopping my head back and forth. I was lost in this canvas. Nothing else matters right now.

I stare at the piece for a while before deciding to fix another area that I don’t think looks convincing enough. My favourite song comes along and I can’t resist it. I set the palette and sponge down to dance in place. I move my body around to the beat as I sing along out loud.

This is the norm for me. Singing, dancing and painting all at the same time. I was alone in my studio after all. I’m doing a painting for Sebastian for our anniversary gift. I want it to be perfect.

I do a quick spin to the music. I catch a glimpse of the large clock on the wall. My eyes widen and I stop immediately. I stare at the clock carefully. 8:23. I look through the window and sure enough, it was dark outside. I let out a gasp before quickly clean myself up. I wash out the brushes, palettes and sponge and cover up the canvas.

I store it into the storage room before locking it up tight. I lock up my studio room and run down the hallway. I’m so late. Sebastian would be home any minute and I haven’t made dinner. Argh, this is why I shouldn’t paint without someone there with me to remind me of the time. I always just lose myself in paintings for hours on end.

When I arrived at our apartment, it was brightly lit. I smell something delicious cooking in the kitchen. Great… he’s home. My heart aches. I feel a little terrible for doing this, possibly, the hundredth time to him.

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maniacani  asked:

*comes in with pizza and drinks* dude, man, my bro, the WHOLE family going on a jog and basically inspiring the whole damn park to be more fit (and look cute while doing so). Like the kids are maybe a little older and they occasionally go on family runs or hikes and everyone is just #GOALS

[The Voltron Family] The Shirogane Family entered a family run for the first time after how the kids loved running with their daddies in the morning. Everyone was excited. They even had matching shirts, shorts and bands, something Shiro would reason out that it was so that they could easily recognize the other when they get lost. Keith knew his husband just wanted them to be that kind of family.

The event started and they all started to run. Shiro was on the far left, while Keith was on the far right with all the three kids in the middle. When they made a turn, 6-year-old Hunk stumbled, causing him to fall and scratch his knee. 

Keith: *abruptly stops* *sees Hunk* *panics* Hunk, baby! *runs towards him*
Hunk: *tries to sit* *crying silently*
Keith: *squats down to Hunk’s level* Shhhhsh, don’t cry.
Hunk: *still crying* It hurts. *holds his leg*

Little did they know, there were cameras flying around that took live footage and at the moment, the audience’s attention were on them.

Announcer: Oh no! A little boy tripped! But it looks like there are people who are already trying to take care of him!
Shiro: *runs towards them* *squats down* Keith, your first—
Keith: Way ahead of you. *gets betadine and band-aid from his fanny pack *
Hunk: *whimpers at the sight of medical products* Noooooo.
Lance: *squeezes Hunk’s hand*
Keith: It’s okay, baby. This won’t hurt. I promise. *cleans the wound with a wetwipe and applies betadine*
Announcer: Wow, look at this. We are all seeing live first aid.
Keith: Daddy’s got you. 
It’s his Daddy, folks! It’s his Daddy! Thank god.
Keith: *presents three types of band-aid* Pick which you want.
Announcer: Wait what is that? Can we zoom in? *beams* Oh my gosh. People. There are three band-aids. Spider-man, Gundam and Spongebob. This is a very hard decision for any little boy, or anyone for that matter. I know I will have a hard time, what more for this boy? And what’s that? He picked Gundam! He. Picked. Gundam! A wise decision! *claps* I’m so proud.
Keith: *smiles* Okay. *applies the band-aid on Hunk*
Pidge: Daddy Shiro, is Hunk okay now? *looks up at Shiro*
Shiro: *nods* Yeah, your Daddy Keith did a good job.
Announcer: Did you guys hear that? Daddy Shiro and Daddy Keith? These are two daddies with their three kids! How adorable is that? They’re new faces too since I’m pretty sure I would’ve remembered such gorgeous faces! *laughs*
Keith: *kisses Hunk’s knee* Alright. You’re good now. *wipes Hunk’s tears*
Hunk: *cries even more* *hugs Keith* Thank you.
Keith: *gives Hunk a peck on the lips* Anything for my baby.
Announcer: Awwwwwww. *sniffles* Of course a kiss to make it all better! Suddenly this year’s family fun run is so much better already than last year’s! We hope this family doesn’t get discouraged of today’s happenings and will attend the event next year because I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one who’d love to see them again!

The audience did a collective “awwww” and a lot of nodding and whistling at the scene they were watching on the big screens.

Keith: Can you get up, sweetheart?
Hunk: *tries to stand up but stumbles* It still hurts.
Shiro: I can carry him. 
Keith: No. You already have Pidge and Lance. You three go ahead. Hunk and I will catch up with you. 
Shiro: Okay. Don’t take too long. *leans in to give Keith a kiss on the lips*
Announcer: *whistles* Is it just me or is it getting hot in here?

As soon as Shiro, Lance and Pidge left…

Keith: Okay, baby. Daddy will carry you, okay? You’ll sit on my shoulders.
Hunk: *eyes widens* *shakes head* No.
Keith: Why not?
Hunk: *whispers* I’m fat and I’m heavy.
Keith: No, you’re not! *holds Hunk’s hands* You’re perfect. Don’t let anyone ever tell you otherwise or I will kick their butts.
Hunk: *giggles* Okay.
Keith: Now, c’mon.
Hunk: But what if your back snaps?
Keith: *absolutely offended* Are you calling me weak, Hunk Shirogane? I did not spar every night with your Daddy Shiro just so my own child can call me weak. I’ve trained so hard, alright? Look at these guns. Might not be as big as your other Daddy but I’m getting there! *huffs*
Hunk: *laughs* 
Keith: *smiles* *lifts Hunk’s chin* And I can definitely carry my little boy. 

So Keith was finally able to convince Hunk to ride on his shoulders and off they resumed their running. They might have been the last ones, but as soon as they saw the finish line, Shiro, Lance and Pidge were cheering on them.

Announcer: And that my folks, is how you finish the family run with a bang! I’m so happy for them to finally finish! *wipes tears* I can’t even remember who won, but the last ones are definitely memorable!
Shiro: *leans in to whisper* Hey, I heard there was a video of my husband and my child. *looks around to check* *hands over a business card definitely not in a very suspicious manner* Mind if you could send over the video to my email?
Announcer: *blinks while looking at Shiro* *takes the card* W-What?
Shiro: *winks* Thanks! I’d appreciate it. 
Keith: *glares at Shiro* TA-KA-SHI.

Honestly, you can’t blame Shiro for wanting some documentation lmao

Lost Souls

Originally posted by alittlebitblockbbias

Part 1/Part 2/Part 3 

Finding your soulmate isn’t always easy; Zico soulmate!au

Everyone always has this belief that when you find your soulmate, that was it. They became your everything, and it was some fairytale ending. And everyone out there had that soulmate that they were destined to meet. But that couldn’t have been further from the truth. Not even half the people in this world would find their other half. Even if they did, it wasn’t always romantic. Most soulmates were made to go through this life together because they understood each other. So their relationship could be that of siblings or friends. That’s why no one in this world waited. The chances of finding that soulmate and them being “the one” was not likely. 

So there were three types of soulmates, all identifiable by the color your mark would change to. The most common was pink, for friendship. Often these types would find themselves early in life. Often they’d be of the same gender. Next was blue. Indicated a family type of relationship. The age differences could vary wildly. Sometimes it could be a mother/daughter type relationship. Maybe even sibling relationship. And then there was red for a romantic relationship. 

However, most went through life as if soulmates didn’t exist….

You stared out into the river, watching the boats come and go. The gentle breeze causing your hair to be slightly tousled. It was a lovely autumn day, sun shinning with the occasional cloud. It was hard to resist the urge to spend the afternoon out here.

You began bringing your cup of coffee to your lips, but a sharp pain in your wrist made you lose your grip. The cup and its contents spilled all over the ground. But to you it was unimportant. You clutched your wrist to your chest at the pain. What was happening? Slowly the pain began to subside and turn into an odd tingling. You brought out your sleeve, rolling up your sleeve. The first thing you saw was your mark, the mark that all people had to help identify ones soulmate. Yours had changed. The once black mark had become red. Your heart rate began to increase, they were here. Your soulmate, a romantic soulmate.

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AHS Hotel: User & Abuser

Tristan Duffy, James March x Reader

Word Count: 2128


Today is your boyfriend, Tristan’s runway modeling gig. It is held by the infamous Will Drake at the Hotel Cortez in downtown Los Angeles. You didn’t go with Tristan to most of his gigs, but you had the day off of work and not to mention, an overnight stay here is free thanks to Will Drake. 

Another reason was because you didn’t trust Tristan. He gained a terrible habit of doing drugs at his gigs and you wanted to be there to make sure he doesn’t. But who knows, Tristan always finds a way. You even tried to convince him to go to rehab in the past but every time you brought it up, he would get defensive.

You know you deserve better and your friends are always telling you to leave him, but you just can’t let go. The both of you have gone through so much together. Good and bad.

There was even a dark time when Tristan has hit you when the both of you got in a heated argument while being heavily intoxicated. He was too drunk to fully realize it, so you just cried yourself to sleep. Being sober the following morning, Tristan apologized and promised it wouldn’t happen again.

“Tristan, you’re on in 10!” The backstage crew member shouted to Tristan as he was walking past him. He was all over the place trying to stay organized, telling models when they were up next. The plan is for Tristan to make an appearance 4 times throughout the show in 4 different outfits.

“Yup!” Tristan replied while sitting in front of the vanity mirror. There was a hairstylist doing last minute touches on his hair. You were standing next to Tristan, putting your hand on his shoulder. “Babe, can you not? I don’t want you in my personal space right now.” Tristan says, moving his shoulder away from you. He’s been such a diva all day and you just went along with it.

“Okay. Whatever.” You let out a sigh, then went to sit on a chair about 5 feet away from him, pulling out your smartphone to keep yourself occupied.

6 minutes later you go to use the bathroom.

Once you come back, you see Tristan quickly snort a line of white powder on his vanity. Your eyes raging with anger, you push Tristan on the back. “What the hell, Tristan?!” 

Tristan rolls his eyes. 

“Tristan Duffy, let’s go! You’re up after Lawrence and Stacy.” The backstage crew member grabs him by the arm to his place. Tristan doesn’t even say a word to you.

“What the fuck?!” Being so angry and disappointed with your boyfriend, you chose not to rush to sit front row to watch him do his thing on the catwalk. Instead, you go to the bar upstairs. 

Because of the fashion event going on in the lobby, the bar is pretty much empty. You see the bartender who’s tall and slim with a bald head, wearing green eye shadow and thick eye liner. Sitting at the bar, you see a pale man with dark brown hair and a modern day Gomez Addams mustache. He is also dressed to the nines in a dark blue suit.

You sit one chair away from him. The bartender walks over to you and asks, “I’m Liz. What’ll you be having, hun?”

“Just make me the strongest drink you can make.” You respond.

“You got it.” Liz starts on making your drink.

“This one’s on me, dear.” The man tells Liz and then looks at you. He moves to sit on the stool next you and puts his hand out for you to shake. “I’m James. James Patrick March.”

“Y/N.” You put your hand to shake his back, but instead, he grabs your hand to kiss your knuckles. Wow. You can’t remember the last time Tristan ever did that to you. “The way you’re dressed, you look like you should be joining the fashion show downstairs.”

James looks up, opening his mouth, letting teeth show. His eyes wide as he responds with, “Ah, yes.” He pauses, then looks back at you. “That sort of festivity is not to my liking. May I ask why are you not attending such occasion?” He had a really strong tone of voice and sounds straight out of an old movie, similar to Clark Gable. Whereas your boyfriend talks more like Rob Kardashian. This man is definitely classy.

“Well, my boyfriend is in the show. But, he really pissed me off beforehand and I can’t even look at him in the face right now. So. Here I am.” You let out a fake laugh. Liz hands you your drink and you take a sip. “The next one’s on me, James.”

“Oh no. Have anything you like, dear. This is my hotel.” With drink in one hand, he puts both of his arms out, being proud to show off his hotel.

“Wow this is your hotel? Tell me all about it.” You are very opened to hearing anything this nice man has to say about his hotel. For once, a man (especially a good looking man) cares to have a decent conversation with you while being very passionate about it. You didn’t want to compare a stranger to your boyfriend, but whenever you sit down with Tristan at the dinner table, he’s always on his damn phone looking through social media instead of talking to you. You really hated how technology has so much control over people nowadays.

“Splendid!” James says in excitement. “Come. Let’s sit.” James nods his head, then puts the hand that’s holding his drink to point at the table nearby.

The table you chose to sit at has a perfect view of the fashion show. Coincidentally, you see Tristan walk on the white runway. A part of you wishes you could be there to support him, but you’re just so pissed about him resorting to drugs. You thought he wouldn’t do it when you’re around, but Tristan’s a hard person to control.

Two hours pass and during that time, you listened to James fascinate about his hotel and he listened to you rant about your boyfriend. The conversation you were having with him made you forget all about the fashion show. James was being a great listener. He didn’t have much to say about Tristan. Most of the time, he nodded his head and listened while smoking a cigarette. You were so caught up in the conversation that you even told James about the violent drunken fight you had with Tristan before. “A man must never lay a hand on his beloved. Especially if she is beautiful like you, dear.” James looks you directly in the eye, then takes a sip of his drink.

You looked down and smiled. James is such a charming man.

You chugged whatever’s left in your glass and check the time on your phone. “Oh shit. I didn’t even realize we’ve been talking this long.” You look over the lobby, seeing everything getting cleaned up. Rushingly, you put your phone in your bag and stand up. “I should really get going, Tristan’s probably wondering where I’m at.” 

“As they say, time flies when one is having fun.” James grins. 

As he’s still sitting down, you quickly give him a hug. He can smell the aroma of your perfume. “It was nice meeting you, James. Thanks again for the drinks. I had a great time.” You start heading downstairs to the elevator.

James puts out his cigarette and starts slowly walking towards the bar. with his hands behind his back. He’s eyeing you while you’re still in sight. 

Liz notices him right away. “James. She has a boyfriend, remember?”

“Ah yes. From what I have learned, this significant other of hers does not have good intentions. I just know.”

Finally, you reached the floor your suite is in. You unlock the door with your room key and rush in, setting your purse on the floor being worried that Tristan’s been concerned where you’ve been.

You start looking for Tristan. The first thing you see is half of an empty bottle of vodka on the table. Then, you walk in the bedroom and find him snorting another line of whatever drug that is on the nightstand. “Are you serious right now?!” You push Tristan and quickly wipe off whatever’s left on the nightstand with your hand. 

Tristan stands up. “What the hell, babe?!” Instead of being embarrassed about you finding out, he’s pissed that you wasted it.

You stand on your tip toes and push Tristan again. “What the hell is wrong with you?! God dammit, you weren’t even worried about where I’ve been for the past couple of hours?!” 

“Stop fucking pushing me, dude!” Tristan yells, putting his face closer to yours as hes grabbing both of your arms.

“Look at you. You’re pathetic. You should’ve gone to rehab like I said. But no, you’re such a fucking loser!” You let go of his grip and push him again, which fills him with even more anger. You can see his face turn red and his jaw clench. He picks you up and throws on the nearest desk, causing the mirror to break. “Tristan!” You screamed. There’s no way that the people in the halls wouldn’t hear that. While he’s staring at you, he’s huffing and puffing from the strength he used to throw you. Mixing drugs, alcohol and anger is never the best idea.

Your mind is filled with confusion. The man you thought that loves you has really outdone himself this time. He made a promise that he wouldn’t lay a hand on you again. You’re so frightened now and just wished you left him the first time it happened. 

You thought to yourself, who knows what else he’s capable of doing? Not thinking thoroughly in the heat of the moment, you grab one of the broken mirror pieces, run up to Tristan and cut his face with it. “I hate you!” 

“Oh, you do huh?!” Tristan grabs you by the wrist, but right before he has the chance to abuse you again, James appears to stop him, making Tristan let go of your wrist. You ran to the nearest wall and cried. You could’ve sworn that the door was locked behind you. But you didn’t care to question it at this point. You’re just thankful that James is here to save you.

“Who are you?” Tristan still breathing heavily asks.

“It does not matter, dear boy. This is my hotel. And I will not allow you to harm, Miss Y/N.” James does not break eye contact.

You look up to see what’s going on as you’re wiping away your tears with the back of your hand. 

An older woman with red hair, wearing a maid uniform bends down to you, handing you a tissue. As you’re sniffling, you say, “Thank you, uhhhhh.”

“Hazel Evers. But you can call me Miss Evers.” The woman smiles at you as she is getting your hair out of your face.

“Fuck off, man!” Tristan attempts to attack James. James being much stronger than him, pushes Tristan on the bed. You can see the veins popping out of James’ neck from using his strength.

James grabs a gun out of his pocket and shoots Tristan in the head.

Your eyes widen in shock and you get up to rush to Tristan’s body but James stops to hold you. “Oh my god, what did you do?!” You didn’t think a man like James was capable of killing someone. 

“I saved you, dear. I saved you before it was too late.” Something about James’ voice is very calming to you. Still holding you, he grabs a handkerchief from his jacket and wipes away your tears.

Taking you with him, he goes to sit on the couch and lays your head to rest on his lap as you cry. Your head was filling with mixed emotions. Of course, you’re sad that the man you thought you loved is laying there dead. But what if James didn’t show up to save you? Who knows what else Tristan is capable of doing to you. He could’ve easily killed you as well. So much just happened in a short amount of time that all you want to do is lay down and cry.

“Miss Evers!” James turns his head to Miss Evers.

“Yes, Mr. March?!” She answers. Miss Evers seems very loyal to James.

“Would you get Sally to help you rid of this body?”

“Right away, sir! What a glorious stain!” She leaves the room excitedly.

James looks back down on you and caresses your head. “There there, dearest. Never will I hurt you like he did.”

Kihyun’s abs

Ok just one thing. I’m going to be brutally honest here. 

I absolutely fucking loathe the way people talk about Kihyun’s abs. 

I’m not going to reblog even one picture of his stomach because even if he’s my bias and probably really proud of his achievement, IT’S NOT LIKE THIS ISN’T THE EXACT REASON WHY HE’S BEEN STARVING.

How can you people act WORRIED over him losing weight and then jizz over the fact that he has abs now?

What’s the deal with kpop idols having abs? Why is it so important? Why do you care? Why are you guys pretending every idol should act and be just like they want to, and then scream your ears deaf when he has seen enough extra effort to form a couple of extra fucking lumps in his stomach? 

They’re not doing this for themselves. Some of you guys don’t do much else but blabber about abs and arms and toned chest muscles so of COURSE they’re going to think that’s the only thing that matters to us. When you’re literally drooling over Wonho’s and Shownu’s bodies, it IS showing the rest of the members a certain message. They’re entertainers, they know what’s up, they know we sexualize and fetishize their bodies to infinity. Kihyun is not stupid. We’ve been making him an effeminate, tiny hamster mom with chubby cheeks and whatever inaccurate bullshit we can come up with - of fucking course he’s been trying his hardest to prove us otherwise.

Wonho may have been working out just because he has always enjoyed doing so, same goes for Shownu. They have been striving for getting fit bodies and even if it’s because of unhealthy beauty standards, it’s still something that’s not solely coming from us fans. Kihyun, however, was here mostly because of his singing skills. He was convinced he could make a lasting impression with that alone, maybe combined with his cute face. But now, with endless comparison and unhealthy praising (towards certain members for their physical appearance) and stupid joking nicknames that decide his personality for him, he’s internalized the idea that he should also flash you some abs (judged by your reaction, it’s almost like he just showed his dick to us) to get enough validation that he’s a real man.

This “real man” thing and its byproducts are a serious cultural problem in Korea among men, so he’s most likely trying harder and harder to convince not only himself, but also his members and us that he can also fit into the same category.

Seriously, this is why men don’t believe us when we say women have it worse when it comes to a social pressure to look good. Abs are nice, for sure, but they’re also just muscles that literally EVERYONE has under the layer of stomach fat that protects our internal organs. Getting rid of that stomach fat requires a lot of unhealthy dieting (draining yourself up) and training and even people who do it for a professional purpose, know that even if you have rock-hard abs, they don’t just miraculously stay there for years to come, but instead they disappear and reappear several times a day because of all that nutrition you ingest. To have us see them, he and Wonho most likely didn’t eat or drink before getting up to the stage.

You know, maybe, just maybe he wouldn’t have to literally put his health in danger if his fans weren’t so thirsty to see that one part of him aside from his dick that proves he’s a “real man”. (Why else would you be so excited? It’s just lumpy skin. It’s just his stomach. But we all are very much aware of what abs are actually representing in our culture. We’re calling him cute and fluffy and whatnot but when he shows signs of conventional masculinity, we’re celebrating it much more than him actually acting cute.) 


It’s not wrong to be happy for him because he reached a goal he’s been trying to achieve for several months. But you have to remember that his goal might not even end here, that he might continue this unhealthy lifestyle and that he’s doing it because of us fans comparing him to his members. Even his friends were worried for him yesterday in the V live for losing too much weight (ofc it was again not his health really but his looks, because they literally can’t get past of that ever, but it’d be nice if WE could be the people that help them see more, since we’re not enslaved in that industry). 

And you have to remember that celebrating him for having abs kind of ruins your images as concerned Kihyun fans. He was proving his actions RIGHT in the concert. The idea that he should lose a lot of weight in order to be approved was reinforced. From now on, it’ll be even harder to convince him he should stop. Just look at the reactions he got. 

Lion Grandpa: Reinhardt Headcanons
  • He’s the sweetest person you’ll ever meet ever and one of the most fun. He’s like everyone’s cool grandpa and best friend and it’s amazing.
  • He and Ana had a romantic relationship when they were younger. Things ended after Ana’s presumed death and it hurt him the most, right behind Pharah, to find out she was alive and never told him.
  • Reinhardt has watched most of D. Va’s videos and is one of her biggest fans, it’s adorable. 
  • Reinhardt is the cuddliest man alive, it’s insane. He loves hugs and gives the best hugs out of anyone (unless he’s emotional. Then that bear hug becomes bone crushing in a nearly literal sense)
  • To every new recruit in Overwatch, Reinhardt was the first person to meet everyone and easily becomes everyone’s first friend. Seriously, he’s the most welcoming and the easiest to talk to, so he kinda made it his personal job to welcome everyone and make them feel like they belong. Everyone has a place and he’ll help everyone find it.
  • Ana taught him how to knit
  • Animals just love him, it’s absolutely precious to see. He’ll be walking down the street and just have a line of stray cats and dogs behind him. If he’s going through the park, then ducks are added to the mix. He doesn’t even discourage it, he loves it and has to be firmly told that, no, he can’t keep the fifteen cats that followed him back to the base.
  • He snores. Not at loud as you think, but you can definitely still hear it
  •  He’s super good with kids, especially younger kids who just think he’s the coolest person of all time. Every year around the holidays, he actually reads to less fortunate kids and has dressed up at Santa before for the occasion
  • He loves to laugh and to make jokes, whether the jokes are good or bad.
  • He can cook and he can do so really well, it’s incredible, to the point where everyone is excited if he makes something. Only problem is that they’ll have leftovers for days because he makes a lot
  • He and Torbjörn get along super well and I can just see them as drinking buddies who laugh too loudly and tell everyone stories of the old days like a hundred times
  • Loves older movies and music (he’s tried getting Lúcio into it to), but he can just as easily get into newer things like some of D. Va’s games
  • He’s a very emotional man. Example, after getting over the hurt over Ana, he did cry and hug her out of sheer relief
  • He’s gotten hurt so much in battle solely because he will run in front of everyone and anyone to protect them, be it a civilian or fellow fighter. He’s probably seen Mercy the most because of it all
  • He knew Mercy’s parents before they died and sort of stepped in as a family figure for her after it all. 
  • This man is basically a big child a lot of the time. He just loses it whenever a holiday is coming up, loves sweets, adores small animals, stuffed animals, everything. It’s adorable.
Witchy Woman, part 3

Series masterlist

John Winchester x witch!reader drabble series based off this aesthetic.

Warnings: drinking

Words: 623

Originally posted by marythenurse

You’d done as he asked. You’d given him a drink, in fact you’d given him three. He was not unphased by the events which had just unfolded. He had almost died for crying out loud, and more than that he had had to come to you, a witch, for help. You almost shivered when you thought of what the community would say if they ever found out. You weren’t particularly involved, and had no connection to a coven, but you still needed a little lifeline. Now, you might be a hermit by choice, but you didn’t need to be flat out shunned by the community.

Another drink might help keep your mind from spinning these immersive thoughts you pondered and poured whiskey for the both of you before you leaned back on your velvet couch, John reclining next to you.

“So what do you want in return?” John asked, his hazel eyes narrowing in on you, still a slight smirk on his lips.

You racked your brain. Sitting beside you was one of the most legendary hunters in the country and he owed you a favor. You had to use this opportunity right, there was no chance in hell you’d get this chance again. It was too bad he couldn’t guarantee your safety on the hand of others like him, but at least you could make him give an oath not to come after you again. He also had the opportunity to get you ingredients you couldn’t come by too easily on your own; werewolf hair, blood of a priest, the nail of a vampire, that sorta thing.

“I want you to swear you won’t come after me again…” You said, before you took a good swig of your whiskey, it’s heat burning its way down your throat.

“When I walk out that door you’ll never see me again.” He nodded in acceptance as he said it, but that was not at all what you wanted.

“No, that’s not all,” you crossed your arms across your chest, “you’re gonna supply me with ingredients as well.”

“What now?” A look of profound confusion shot across his handsome features.

“When you hunt and come across something I might want, you bring it to me,” you stated matter of factly.

“This just a ploy to keep me coming back here?” He mocked, his eyes twinkling devilishly in the dim light of your sitting room. Damn that charm, you could feel your face flush, hoping the whiskey had a little something to do with it.

“Dream on, Winchester,” you tried to keep a straight face, but couldn’t help a playful smirk from hitting your lips, “don’t flatter yourself.”

John chuckled at your response. Damn that chuckle, that deep rumble in his firm chest sending shivers down your spine. You had to admit, you had no problem with him coming back as a friend instead of a foe. Your lonesome existence could use some tall, dark and handsome man to break it up. To offer a little love and care… and lust and excitement. Your mind wandered and you had to uncross your legs as not to add involuntary friction between them. You were growing flustered, and it was all because of him. Maybe he could flatter himself a little…

John continued to drink his whiskey, and you went on toying with the idea of offering him more than your couch for the night. It had been so long since you had a man to share a bed and some intimacy with. And what was really the worst thing that could happen?

“So then, how’s this couch to sleep on?” He snickered at you.

“Just terrible,” you teased, “so you really should jump in bed with me instead.”


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Mr. Byun

Originally posted by galaxychen

A/N: …yeah, Baekhyun is actually ruining my life.

These drabbles will be painfully short and very bad. I just need to get out my Baeky feels before I get back to reaction request and the ongoing series. 

*sigh* Pray for me

Edit: I though this would be a drabble but its not. Why is it so long? Imma just say its a long drabble.

~Admin Allie

You hated your job. The only good side of it was that you got paid way too much money for it. 

You were a waitress/hostess/bartender at a very high profile restaurant. And high profile is putting it lightly; no one but the most popular artist, actors and business people rolled through. Some were there for business meetings, some for fun and other to take out their secret lovers. 

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zombieland starter sentences
  • "It's amazing how quickly things can go from 'bad' to 'total shit-storm'."
  • "Stop, no names. Keeps us from getting too familiar."
  • "You almost knocked over your alcohol with your knife."
  • "More? No, one for me. One and done, I always say...I said that once."
  • "I'm sensing you're a bit of a bitch."
  • "You're a peppy little spit fuck, aren't you?"
  • "I could use a Twinkie."
  • "I hate coconut. Not the taste, the consistency."
  • "I find lots of things disturbing."
  • "When you're afraid of everything that's out there, you quit going out there."
  • "I don't usually unlock my door to the sounds of panic...but my neighbor is insanely hot."
  • "Look, the point is I'm here for you, okay?"
  • "And as long as you're by my side, I'm not leaving this apartment."
  • "You see, you just can't trust anyone. The first girl I let into my life and she tries to eat me."
  • "You wanna feel how hard I can punch?"
  • "I'm worried about you."
  • "Time to nut up or shut up!"
  • "You got a purdy mouth!"
  • "Someone's ear is in danger of having hair brushed over it."
  • "Act normal, try not to freak her out."
  • "Better you make the mistake of trusting us, than we make the mistake of trusting you."
  • "Nice going genius."
  • "I never had headaches like this 'til your ass came on board."
  • "Do what you want with a man, but do not fuck with his Cadillac."
  • "Thank God for rednecks."
  • "Gotta enjoy the little things."
  • "She was like a crouching tiger."
  • "You got taken hostage by a 12-year-old?"
  • "Well, girls mature faster than boys."
  • "It's amazing how far you can get with some costume jewelry and a cut-throat attitude."
  • "You know what, I may not shoot you, but you still royally piss me off."
  • "How about we play the quiet game?"
  • "Let me begin my three-part apology by saying I think you're a wonderful human."
  • "You gotta enjoy the little things...Even if that means destroying a whole lot of little things."
  • "You know, I think sleep deprivation is like the number one health problem in America."
  • "We're in Hollywood, let's sleep in style."
  • "Dibs on the bed."
  • "Oh, this is so exciting, you're about to learn who you're gonna call...Ghostbusters."
  • "Take away a man's son, you've truly given him nothing left to lose."
  • "Don't make me drink alone."
  • "I don't even know your name, but this is actually really nice."
  • "You know? Between me and you, you're actually kind of cute."
  • "You are like a giant cock-blocking robot developed in a secret fucking government lab."
  • "This is the problem with getting attached to someone. When they leave you just feel lost."
  • "That's why I don't let people close, you only get burned."
  • "Not bad for that scrawny little spit-fuck."

anonymous asked:

*plops on* I'm staying here until Lucifer takes Chloe as his bride and WE are ALL going to pile up here and wait it out as a FAMILY. A highly dysfunctional family with EXTREME daddy and mommy issues! - Old-scratch

Okay but, purely for the fluff and for the palliation of our bruised fangirl hearts after 2x13, just imagine a Deckerstar wedding.


Chloe probably had to take the devil by the horns and actually propose herself, half by accident, after Lucifer finally bought a ring but chickened on it and chickened on it and kept stammering and changing the subject whenever he tried. Post-a few exasperated chats with Maze, for both of them, Chloe is finally like “look, I know you have it, so… do you want to give it to me or not?”

And he gets this utter deer-in-the-headlights look and bumbles through an obliviously adorable speech about not deserving her and he knows she already did this once and he’s probably worse than Detective Douche – er, Dan, etc, etc, but Chloe shuts him up by kissing him. Because you know what? She wants to do this, with him. She wants to show him, again, that it’s real. That she doesn’t want anything less with him than she ever had with Dan.

Ella is astounded when they walk into work the next day, grinning like fools, because she always figured they had already been married for about five years. But she is very excited and bursting at the seams to help plan the wedding.

Dan claps Lucifer on the shoulder and tells him to do a better job with her than I did, man. He also congratulates Chloe later.

Trixie is of course OVER THE GODDAMN MOON. So is Penelope. They and Ella (and Maze, who has VERY INTERESTING IDEAS) take over planning Chloe’s bachelorette party.

Amenadiel and Dan get stuck planning Lucifer’s bachelor party, which they think can’t possibly be any more of a crazy party than Lucifer himself has already thrown. This ends up just being the three of them drinking beer in Lucifer’s penthouse and having surprisingly heartfelt conversations about life. Amenadiel reminds Dan at least three times that he looks like a cop.

Linda is equally over the moon but has to talk Lucifer out of at least a dozen wrong conclusions about marriage and what a wedding would be and his various comments on his parents’ marriage and how badly that went wrong and so on and so forth. This takes at least a few weeks.

Likewise, Lucifer panics and runs away for hours at least five times. They aren’t exactly doing anything Kardashian-fancy, but Lucifer’s pride (and sense of decor) will not allow him to proceed with any trashy low-rent affair. Nothing but the best for his detective. He gives her his black card and tells her to get whatever she likes, dress-shopping.

Chloe, being a frugal and sensible person, does not spend fifty grand on a designer dress, though she is briefly tempted. She gets something pretty, simple, and sensible. Trixie loves it. Maze is dismayed that it could be, like, at least ten times wilder.

(Maze’s idea of dressing the bridesmaids – her, Linda, and Ella – in matching white leather catsuits is resoundingly voted down.)

Amenadiel is the best man and keeps trying to find somewhere to practice his speech where Lucifer won’t overhear him. Trixie is, of course, the flower girl.

Obviously the Devil Himself is not going to get married in a church, and even “death do us part” is a bit silly as a wedding vow, because death has parted them twice now and that has been NBD. Linda does not get paid nearly enough to deal with all Lucifer’s existential crises over an angel marrying a human and one of them being immortal and the other mortal and all this. He just about calls the whole thing off again, but one look at Chloe’s face when he gets home that night, as she and Trixie and Maze are arguing about wedding cakes, and she looks up at him and just shines, and he doesn’t.

The big day finally gets there, everyone is panicking and running around, and Lucifer goes off to the beach, where they’re holding it, and terrifies the caterers and the setup people, until Maze drags him off to get dressed. Not without a few smacks upside the head.

Finally everyone gets sorted out and starts arriving, it’s just a small family-and-friends thing, there are chairs set up on the beach and it’s a perfect L.A. afternoon. Penelope is in her element and bustling around and greeting people, while Lucifer is having a heart attack over in one of the tents and Amenadiel is torn between patting him on the shoulder and whacking him.

Finally finally, however, they get going and it shouldn’t, it never should, it has been barely controlled chaos up until now, but it… works.

Lucifer appears in his tux and does not run away. Stands and waits until he sees Chloe, who is walking herself up the aisle (she wants to point out, again, that she is the only reason she’s coming to him, just her, just her choice, just them).

The expression on his face, just then, would light up a thousand stars and a thousand more. He is in absolute awe. He can barely remember his vows.

(Maze is determined not to cry. She fails. Linda doesn’t even bother trying not to.)

They hold the reception. They eat cake. They have a honeymoon booked for tomorrow, somewhere remote and tropical and quiet, but right now it’s just them and their family and that is all they care about. They can barely take their eyes off each other. It would be disgusting if it wasn’t so adorable.

Amenadiel gets sloshed on three Cosmos and destroys the dance floor.

Bite Me (Bitch)

Originally posted by jjks

Note: This is another reupload with edits from my old writing blog (uyuagashi-fics).  I held a prompt game that was a lot of fun, and the request that time was “Suga + bite + breaking the rules”.  This one fits so well with all the vampire looks BTS has gifted us with.  As always, I added in a LOT more to the original post and tidied up some portions of the writing.  This is very BTVS-inspired in terms of vampire lore but there’s lore from other shows/movies/books mixed in as well.  Also, I lost so much steam with this, and I’m unhappy, but whatever.  

I am currently stuck on a very important portion of my Radio DJ Suga AU, and I need to focus on other writing to get out of my rut.  

Summary:  Your existence should repulse him, but Yoongi can’t bring himself to hate you when he craves your bite.  ~Vampire AU~




Yoongi is in a bizarre state of discomfort when he sits through eighty minutes of an in-depth lecture on vampires during DEM 325 (Demonic Physiology).  The other recruits in his class are studiously taking notes as their instructor goes through slide after slide of vampire anatomy, but he can’t bring himself to write down a word.  He can feel his ulcers acting up when the instructor pays special attention to mortality zones.

“Some of you are taking the laboratory component this semester with me,” Dr. Kim notes with a kind, yet condescending smile.  “And let me give you a hint: vampires are Big on the final.  The bulk of my field research is focused on vampires, so it’s an area I know well.”  She pauses for effect.  “And if I see outstanding talent, there are always positions open in my team.”  

The class murmurs with excitement.  Getting real field experience was the dream for recruits.

Dr. Kim gives the class an indulgent smile once more.  “So make sure you do the reading.”  

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