Words: 7.1k (whoops)
Relationship Status: together
Summary: It’s Phil’s 30th birthday, and instead of waking up to his celebratory
pancakes, he finds Dan missing and instructions for what seems to be a
scavenger hunt. What will be his surprise when he gets to the end?
With every passing day since Joshua properly introduced himself, you notice your feelings for him grow stronger. You find yourself falling for him, slowly. It has been about three months since you had your first actual conversation when he clarified that, no, he does not work and has never worked as a barista in your favorite coffee shop.
Each day you spend together, you learn something new about each other. You learn that he covers his mouth when he laughs and his eyes turn into crescent shaped lines on his face. He has a habit of breaking into a rap in the middle of conversation (something you found extremely embarrassing and adorable at the same time) and he is a gentleman, in every sense of the word.
Although the time you spend together is limited, being a member of a popular idol group does have its downsides, you appreciate how he makes time just to be able to talk or be with you, be it a three-minute long phone call in between their practice or coffee shop and dinner dates when you feel like you have all the time in the world. You admire his commitment to his group but sometimes you can’t help but wish you got to see him more.
The screen lights up and a text notification appears on your phone.
Joshua: Hey y/n! Just finished practice for day and now I am free. Would you like to hang out?
Your heart flutters as you read the text and you quickly write a response.
Y/N: Yay! I would love to! Where were you thinking?
Joshua: It’s a surprise! Meet me at the coffee shop in ten? Xx
Y/N: Ooh exciting, see you there! Xx
You’re smiling so hard that your cheeks hurt. Quickly putting on a little makeup and tying up your hair with a ribbon, you make your way out the door and down the street to your favorite coffee shop in the world.
The evening was amazing. After talking over lattes until the shop closed, Joshua took you out of dinner at a beautiful restaurant. The food was delicious and you both ate so much that you could barely move. On the way home, you stopped by the park across the street from your apartment.
“Hey Y/n? How good was the food tonight?”
“Gosh, I am so full that I can’t even talk about it.” A cool breeze sweeps through the trees, you shiver a little and huddle closer to Joshua.
“Oh, are you cold?”
“Just a little.” You raise your hands to your mouth and blow warm breathe into them. Joshua steps back and removes his coat, placing it onto your shoulders instead.
“I can’t let my date get sick now can I?” He smiles brightly and puts an arm around your waist.
“Oh how gentlemanly of you.”
As the sun sets, the two of you walk hand in hand through a cute little garden and reach a bridge that stretches across a pond. Mirrored in the water, the first stars of the night peak through. You gaze at their reflections as the glimmer and twinkle. Small drops of rains fall into the pond, and the ripples make the stars dance across its surface. You turn toward Joshua and realized he is staring at you.
“What?” You blush and turn your face away from him. Joshua puts his hand on your cheek and stares into your eyes.
“You’re eyes sparkle so brightly, just like the stars.” The red in your cheeks deepens but you continue to look at Joshua, examining his features. A light blush rises across his cheeks too.
“Do you mind if I…” His voice is so soft and kind. You give a small nod in reply. He leans in and gives you a small peck on the lips. You pull back, give a small smile then press your lips against his once more. And as the rain falls down onto the two of you, soaking your clothes, you wish for the moment to never end.
When I started this blog, I never expected it to grow the way it has done. I’d like to say a huge thank you to everyone who has enjoyed my poetry. I remember being excited after 100 followers and now it’s turned into 10,000! I’m so grateful and and excited to keep sharing my work. Thank you everyone xx
(Request: Could I please have headcanons of a jealous Newt? Basically how he would react to people hitting on the reader since it is New York and you could please include catcallers. I love your blog so much :) thank you )
(A/N: This got me so excited I literally squealed! I absolutely love writing jealous Newt! Especially since he’s such a sweet little bean, jafoidj I’m so excited! Thank you anon, you’re the best! xx)
Newt being jealous of someone hitting on you would include:
*~At first you didn’t really notice it, even when the whistling happened, you just assumed it was someone being an arse.
*~You could see Newt’s fist tighten slightly on his suitcase and his jaw clench, but whenever you would ask him if he was alright, he’d look at you with wide eyes, confused.
*~ It was’t until someone gripped your arm and whirled you around so that you were face to face with a strange man, did you get a reaction out of Newt.
*~ Newt was always a very calm, pigeon toed man, but as soon as that happened, Newt’s face changed, revealing a very frightening man. His voice was was calm, but full of rage. “It’s not wise,” he had said, “to touch a lady without her permission.”
*~As soon as that fiasco was over though, Newt was back to his silly, pigeon toed self., but you realized he was now standing closer to you.
*~Another time, a man with blue eyes asked you smugly if you would go for a “ride on my cycle,” to which you replied, “no, thank you.” but Newt also had a say in it as he continued with, “(y/n) is traveling with me.”
*~In fact, after someone honked at you, you could swear you heard Newt mutter angrily to himself and Pickett blow a raspberry.
*~Most of the time however, he gave back smart comments that amazed you to no ends. “Maybe (y/n) might say yes if you weren’t such a tosser.”
*~His sarcasm came out and although you hated to admit it, it was quite humorous, “Your pickup lines are failing- just like your chances with (y/n).”
‘Hey Y/N! Are you still coming later this evening? I’m so excited to see you! I can’t wait to give you a massive squeeze! Xx' You laughed quietly to yourself as you read over the text from your best childhood friend Zoë.
'Hey Zo! Well yes of course I’m still going to yours later tonight! I can’t miss such an important evening! I’ve missed you more Zo! :( Super excited to give you a major squeeze too! See you in a couple of hours xxx' You replied quickly.
Grinning to yourself, you removed yourself from the comfort of your mattress, walking over to your doorway.
“Hey mum!” You called out, smiling slightly as she peeked her head out from the bathroom, holding the full, red basket of laundry. “You know that I’m going to see the Suggs later tonight, right?” You asked, watching a small smile appear on your mums lips as she nodded.
“How could I forget? It’s all you’ve been talking about!” Your mum laughed, her eyes rolling playfully at you, causing you to stick out your tongue.
It was true though. You really haven’t stopped talking about it. Tonight was a really big deal for you. Your two best childhood friends were returning home to your small town village for the first time in quite a while. The last time you saw Zoë and Joe Sugg, was for a brief moment when they were sliding into their cars to drive off to a surprise party for their mothers birthday, which was almost nearing two years ago.
Of course, there was no bad blood between the three of you. It was understandable that they had a difficult time visiting their hometown. The siblings live a very busy scheduled life style. Their YouTube channels were a huge success causing their careers to sky rocket and land themselves a large fan base each. With the sudden and huge success in their careers, it’s brought so many opportunities to each of them, such as book deals, book tours, wax figures, beauty product deals and DVD deals. You’ve lost count of how many amazing opportunities have been given to them. You really couldn’t be any prouder of the two Sugg siblings.
“You better get ready, darling. It’s almost five o'clock! You’re meant to be at the Suggs house in an hour and a half! You don’t want to let that Sugg boy down!” Your mum sang, your eyes rolling playfully at her words, a subtle blush colouring your cheeks.
“I’m going, I’m going!” You laughed, walking back into your room, preparing yourself for a quick shower.
As you grabbed a couple of fluffy towels, you felt your heart flutter at your thoughts about later tonight. Tonight would be the first time you’ll have seen Joe in over two years. To make the night even more special and a little nerve wrecking, was the fact that tonight was Joe’s twenty fifth birthday, and he asked Zoë to invite you around tonight. The last time you saw Joe in person, was the night that he was leaving to move to London.
It was also the night that you failed to tell him about your long time love for him.
The nerves in your stomach were floating around with the butterflies in your stomach, as thoughts about Joe manoeuvred their way around your head.
Would anything have changed about him?
Would he even want to talk to you?
Did Joe just ask Zoë to invite you because you’re an old friend?
What if he’s changed? You can’t just change him back.
Walking into the bathroom, you shook your head at all of your thoughts, only allowing yourself to think of one thing.
'Just don’t forget the present.’
“Don’t wait up for me mum, I’ve got my keys and my phone, so I’ll see you later!” You called out into the living room, keeping Joe’s birthday present tight in your hands while walking out of the house.
Puffing out a breath, you glanced down at your outfit. You decided to wear your new powder blue dress. Running your fingers along the white lace material around your waist, you bit down on your lip, wondering if you dressed yourself up too much for a garden party.
Closing your eyes, you breathed in a deep, calming breath, stepping away from your house and beginning to walk confidently down the sidewalk, making the all too familiar five minute journey towards the Suggs family home.
As you walked down the pavement, listening to your heeled sandals click against the ground, you couldn’t help but grin seeing birthday banners strung on the front door of the thatched house. You could feel the palms of your hands grow clammy with nerves, the closer you got to the door.
Relaxing your shoulders and straightening your posture, you did one last make up check with your phone, before confidently pressing the doorbell. The sound of your heavy beating heart was now thumping in your ears, watching the wooden door creak open, revealing to you a petite girl with bright blue eyes.
“Y/N!” Zoë squealed, the two of you wrapping one another into a crushing hug.
“Oh my gosh, I’ve missed you so much!” Zoë gasped, keeping you locked in her arms as she hugged you tighter. “It’s been far too long! I’m so annoyed that I haven’t been able to come and see you more often! Oh come in, come in!” Zoë beamed, closing the door and leading you both into the house.
“You look gorgeous! I absolutely love your dress! Where did you buy it?” Zoë gasped, making you twirl around for you causing you dress to fan out. You blushed at her words and shyly adjusted your hair.
“I bought it in this new boutique down in the village! Maybe if you’re staying for the weekend, we can pop down to it? If anyone looks gorgeous, it is most definitely you! I really love what you’ve done with your hair!” You grinned, motioning to Zoë’s shoulder length hair that was curled to perfection.
“It’s quite a big change since we last saw one another!” She grinned, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear.
Following Zoë into the kitchen, you were greeted by the scent of barbecued food. The sound of Zayn Malik’s song 'Pillowtalk’, streaming through speakers set up in the garden. The sound of small talk and laughter blending in with the music.
“Here, take a glass of champagne!” Zoë giggled, taking two glass flutes of bubbling champagne, handing one over to you. “Mum and Dad are out in the garden! Come on, I know that Joe is super excited to see you!” She grinned, leading you out to the back garden.
“Guess who’s here!” Zoë called out over the chit chatting, her hand motioning to you. “It’s Y/N!” She smiled excitedly. You could feel your cheeks grow hot as you looked towards Zoë’s family all gathered around a wooden garden table. Champagne being held in everyone’s hand. “Y/N, I’m really hoping that you remember my mum and dad!” Zoë giggled, walking you over to the table.
“Well of course! How can I forget my neighbours that I see almost every day?” You laughed looking over to Zoë’s eyes, realisation crossing over her face. Out of the three of you, you were the only one to stay at home. You were very much a home bird, and you really enjoyed living in a nice and private area of the country, so you haven’t made the big decision like Joe and Zoë, to move away from home.
“Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Sugg.” You grinned, waving your hand timidly at the two gleaming parents who were now greeting you with welcoming, bright smiles.
“Oh darling, you know our names! Don’t be afraid to ware them out!” Zoë’s mum laughed as Zoë cringed at her words.
“Mum, that was totally not cool.” She whined, her hand covering her face.
“What’s not cool?” You could feel your breath instantly catch in your throat as the all too familiar voice rang in your ears. Turning your body around, you were greeted instantly with a striking pair of blue eyes, a chuckle leaving his lips as Zoë explained the cringe situation.
“Well, well, well, if it isn’t Ms. L/N!” Joe announced, a broad smile crossing his features. You could feel your stomach do back flips as he stepped closer towards your body. Your heart was now beating radically fast at his actions.
“It’s so great to see you, Y/N! I’m so glad that you could come and see us..” He grinned, his arms extending out towards you, pulling you into a warm embrace. Wrapping your arms around his frame, you couldn’t help but inhale the scent of his cologne. It was always one of your favourite things to do when you were growing up with one another, due to the fact that Joe always bought the most amazing and most lovely scented aftershaves.
As much as you didn’t want to, you drew back from the comforting hug, immediately taking in Joe’s appearance. Adulthood was treating Joe immensely well. Joe was sporting a pair of back, ripped skinny jeans and a fresh white shirt while his hair was styled in a neat yet messy quiff.
“I’m really glad to be here! It’s so lovely to see you both! Especially after all of these years..” You smiled, looking up into his eyes softly. “You look great!” You grinned, motioning to his clean cut appearance. “I love the new hair!” You continued, biting down on your lip feeling your cheeks begin to burn. You watched Joe’s smile grow wider, his hand running through his hair.
“I think it’s a lot cooler than it used to be. I can’t believe mum used to let me straighten my hair everyday. The worst part is, she actually allowed me to go out dressed like that! Joe laughed, his hand scratching the back of his neck sheepishly as you bubbled up with laughter at the memory, remembering the days when Joe would spend hours in the bathroom just straightening his hair with Zoë’s expensive hair straighteners.
"Zoë! Joe! Don’t make the poor girl stand! Sit her down!” Daddy Sugg tsked, flipping over one of the burgers on the barbecue.
“Y/N is sitting with me!” Zoë squealed, rushing over to the garden table to grab you a chair next to hers. “We have so much girly stuff to catch up about! Come over to me Y/N” She beamed giddily.
“Oi! I’m the birthday boy so she’s sitting with me!” Joe pouted, immediately flashing you sad puppy dog eyes. “Please Y/N, it’s my birthday, you can’t not sit with me..” Joe whined softly. Biting down on your lip, you attempted to bite back the grin that was now trying to break free.
“You know I can’t say no to the puppy eyes..” You cried out, earning a triumphant cheer from Joe and a disappointed cry from Zoë.
“Also, Happy birthday, birthday boy!” You grinned sheepishly, holding out the wrapped present towards him as he brought you over towards the garden table.
“Y/N..” Joe gasped. “You shouldn’t have got me anything! Your gift to me was turning up!” Joe chuckled, his arms wrapping around you, tugging you into his chest for a hug. Laughing quietly at his words, you hugged him softly, smiling against his chest.
“It’s nothing too fancy, it’s just something small..” You smiled shyly, thanking Joe as he held out your chair for you to sit down.
“Oooh, what did you get Joseph?” Zoë asked, a look of curiosity crossing her features.
You watched as a Joe excitedly unwrapped the colourful wrapping paper, two gifts falling into his lap. Your heart beat increasing as his hands grabbed hold of the gifts.
“Oh my god, Y/N, love..” Joe whispered, his eyes wide with surprise as his fingers grabbed hold of the DVD box.
“It’s the exact Lee Evans DVD we would watch after doing our homework. I remember how devastated you were when you lost it..and now you can watch it whenever you’d like..” You grinned, shyly playing with the material of your dress. You smiled brightly watching Joe read the back of the DVD box, in hopes that he really did like the present. You were rather nervous about giving Joe a birthday gift, due to the fact that you couldn’t buy him a really extravagant gift, due to your small paying job. Suddenly you felt your heart leap as Joe revealed the silver framed photo of you and him on your first day of school.
“Oh my..” Joe grinned, a chuckle leaving his lips as his fingers danced along the silver frame, the sound of Zoë and her mum cooing in the back making you blush.
“I’m sorry that it’s nothing exquisite or huge..but I just thought that you might like it..It brings back old memories, doesn’t it?” You grinned shyly, sipping on the cool glass of champagne to settle your bouncing nerves. Looking down to the photo, you grinned at the miniature you and Joe, hugging one another tightly with neatly combed hair and red backpacks resting on your back.
“Y/N, I absolutely love it!” Joe grinned, his eyes glazing with happiness. “You really shouldn’t have! Thank you so much!” Joe gleamed, his arms wrapping around your shoulders and hugging you tightly. You could feel your cheeks blush as Joe whispered his thanks to you, sending you a wink as he pulled back.
“You two were really dressed like two cool kids!” Zoë’s mum grinned causing Joe to chuckle.
“Well of course we were! Y/N and I were the coolest kids in this village!” Joe smirked, sipping on his champagne, a laugh leaving your lips at his words. “I mean, have you seen those backpacks of ours? Everyone was totally jealous.” He chuckled, glancing down to your eyes, his hand placing itself on your knee.
“Thank you Y/N. I really love that photo and I’m definitely going to treasure it for the rest of my life. I know exactly where I’m going to put it in the house too.” Joe grinned, looking into your eyes softly making your heart flutter,
“Alright then, who’s up for food?” Mr. Sugg grinned, looking between all of you on the table.
“Guys, I’m going to bed..I can’t believe we’ve stayed up all night chit chatting! My eyes can’t stay open any longer!” Zoë laughed through mid-yawn.
“Awe Zoë, the party is only starting!” You giggled, hiccuping through your words, holding your glass flute of champagne that was now half full.
“I’m sorry Your/Nickname. I’m struggling to stay awake, but I’ll text you in the morning, yeah? We can go down to the town and do some shopping..” Zoë giggled, hugging you gently as you nodded happily to her words, watching her walk away into the house.
“So, Y/N, now it’s just the two of us..You’re not going to leave me, are you?” Joe asked you, his body leaning towards yours.
“Well, it’s pretty much five in the morning..M-Maybe I should start heading home..” You sighed, mirroring Joe’s pouty face and slowly standing to your feet, giggling as you almost tripped over the legs on the garden chair.
Tonight was really fantastic. You really couldn’t have asked for a better night. It was just yourself, Zoë and Joe hanging out for the entire night. You ate home made burgers and dived into a delicious birthday cake, while sipping on wine and champagne, causing you to now be in a slightly drunk state. You reminisced on the golden olden days of your childhood, and you talked about how amazing their careers are, discussing all of their amazing achievements and awards. You talked about all of the pranks that Joe would pull on the headmaster at school and the pranks he pulled on his mum and dad.
“I’ll walk you home..” Joe grinned, slurring his words ever so slightly while standing to his own two feet, wobbling ever so slightly as he did so. “I’ll protect you from the bad guys..” He smirked causing you to laugh.
“Who are you going to protect me from? Gangster grandad? Our neighbours are mostly eldelry!” You giggled, listening to Joe chuckle at your words. “But I would very much enjoy your protection while walking home.” You smiled, following Joe’s lead out to the garden gate.
“It’s rather chilly, isn’t it? Here..” Joe whispered, his fingers wrapping his black leather jacket around your shoulders, pulling it closely around you. “This looks so much better on you..” Joe grinned causing your cheeks to glow bright pink at his words, your heart fluttering at his words and his gesture.
“You’re being too kind now..” You smiled shyly, thanking Joe for lending you his leather jacket.
As you walked out onto the pavement, you looking up to the sky, watching the sky turn from black to a soft blue with a mixture of red and orange. The night stars were still glowing ever so slightly with a mixture of a few grey clouds. .
“Why haven’t you moved from home? Chased your dreams..” Joe questioned, his eyebrows furrowing together while his blue eyes eyes gazed down to yours. A quiet sigh left your lips at his words. Your brain was telling you not to explain your reasons, yet the alcohol that was overpowering your blood stream and taking control of your mind told you to let if all out.
“As much as I would love to just chase my dreams..I’ve got my family here..I know my routine around here and I know my place..Moving away from it all..I’d be so lost..scared..” You breathed, taking in a quick breath to calm your fast beating heart as you looked up to Joe’s eyes, seeing him gaze at you intensely.
“Of course it’s scary to chase your dreams..that’s when you know that your dream is big enough..You only get one life Y/N and it isn’t a rehearsal..This is it..You get one shot..One shot to make it happen..If you really want to make your dream work, you need to get out there and chase it with full speed..” Joe spoke, his body stopping you from walking further, his fingers immediately looping with yours making your heart skip a couple of beats.
“I was scared you know? I was scared to move away from my family and my home town and my routine..but now I’m living my absolute dream and I’m doing the things I love, making new friends and making new memories, I’m open to so many opportunities..You just need to the courage and the motivational push to do it..” Joe smiled, his hand squeezing yours lightly. As you listened to his words, you couldn’t help the smile that was growing on your lips at Joe’s motivational words.
“Do you always give this advice to people at five a.m.?” You whispered, smiling up to Joe noticing how much closer you are to him, both of your chests pressing together.
“I only give it to the special people in my life..” He grinned, his hand now lightly grazing your cheek and tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear.
“What do you want to do Y/N? What is one thing that you you want to do in this life?” Joe asked you, his free hand now resting on your hip making your breath catch.
“Honestly?” You breathed, watching Joe nod with a small grin. “You know how everyone wants to be kissed in the rain, underneath the stars?” You asked quietly, seeing Joe nod his head once more. “Well, I want to be kissed in the rain during the sunrise..Because how often does it rain during sunrise, hm?” You smiled, laughing quietly at your words feeling your mind begin to drift to the perfect moment you so desperately want to have.
“I think your dream is about to come true..” Joe smirked.
Suddenly, as if it were a scene from a Disney movie. Joe’s lips pressed against yours making your body tingle. Fireworks exploded behind your closed eyes as your heart fluttered rapidly like a newborn butterfly. You could feel your blood racing through your veins with excitement as your lips moulded together with Joe’s, sharing a passionate and needing kiss, something you’ve been dying to do since you were a teenager. Suddenly, you felt some wet drops hit against the top of your head, causing you to softly draw back from Joe’s lips and look up to the sky, watching the sun start to rise as a sun shower began to start wildly.
“You can’t deny that this isn’t just pure luck, this is meant to be Y/N. I love you Y/N..and I’ve wasted all these days, all of these years holding this secret to myself..but. I love you Y/N..I want to love you the way I loved you when we were eighteen..” Joe grinned, caressing your cheek in his large hand causing tears of excitement, relief and happiness to trickle down your cheeks and blend in with the rain falling down.
“I love you Joe..I’ve loved you since we were eighteen..Theres never been a day that’s gone by that I don’t love you. I love you with all of my heart, all of my soul, and everything that I have.” You beamed, brushing Joe’s wet hair to the side before squealing loudly as Joe grabbed hold of your waist and twirled you around.
There was nothing more perfect than that moment Y/N and Joe shared. Y/N ticked off her number one box on her bucket list, and as for Joe, he couldn’t have received a better birthday present, than finally getting the girl that he’s never stopped loving for as long as he can remember.
How are you all?
I really hope that all of you are feeling good.
If you’re not having the best week, please remember that I love you so incredibly much.
This imagine was meant to be posted on Joe’s birthday, but I’ve been having some internet problems so I unfortunately didn’t get to post it, but oh my gosh, JOE IS NOW TWENTY FIVE! What!? That’s insane! I can’t believe that my baby little thatcher is twenty five! I really hope that he had the most amazing birthday and that he spent it with his friends and family and had the most amazing time because he truly deserved such an epic birthday and I hope he got lots of presents!
I really hope that you enjoyed this imagine and if you did, please don’t be afraid to comment down below and let me know! All of your comments, thoughts and feedback mean the entire world to me!
I love all of you so incredibly much and I’ll be updating very soon :)
A/N: so this is part one of my new pregnancy series!! I chose Mia for the bff’s name just ‘cause it’s one of my friend’s name. I’m so excited!! Let me know what you think! xx
“Two lines,” You exclaim hysterically through the bathroom door, throwing the plastic stick on the counter next to the other three tests you’ve already taken, “What the fuck am I gonna do?” You ask your best friend as she joins you in the bathroom.
“Well, don’t panic, maybe you’re taking the tests wrong,” She suggests stupidly, her eyes scanning over the row of used pregnancy tests currently resting on your counter.
“How stupid do you think I am?” You scoff, throwing your hands up in frustration as you give her your best annoyed look, “You take the stick and you pee on it, that’s it. There’s literally only two steps, how the hell would I fuck that up?”
“Okay, calm down,” She says, pushing you to sit on the edge of her bathtub, “Breathe, sweetie, everything will be fine.”
“I’m not ready for this, Mia,” You sniffle as tears begin to fill your eyes, “I can barely take care of myself, how am I supposed to take care of a little person?”
“You’re the most caring person I know, this baby will be so loved,” She whispers, sitting next to you, she throws her arm around your shoulder, pulling you in for a hug as she rubs your back soothingly, “Unless you don’t want it, there’re other options, you know.”
“No,” You shake your head, frowning as your mind wanders to all the possible options for your situation, “I can’t.”
“Okay,” She nods in agreement, both of you sitting in silence for a few moments before she continues, “Are you gonna tell him?”
i'm really tempted to reread radio silence, seeing everyone always be so excited about it on your blog... it's without a doubt the best YA book i've read in recent years. plus i'm so excited forbook three and future works!! xx
Y/N You returned back to the temporary dorm to gather your things, a slight tension still lingered between you and Lindsay, but neither of you brought up the topic. Neither of you wanted to get in an even bigger fight over it. It was pretty much over, at this point, but you were still mad at her. And she knew it, yet neglected to do anything to make up for it.
That made you even more mad.
When you were mad, instead of yelling at her in a fit of rage, you always wrote down your feelings in your notebook you kept at all times. You hated to call it a diary–it was more of a vent book to you. That way, you could get your anger or sadness out in a healthy way instead of bottling it up inside, making matters worse and creating more frustration in your mind.
Lindsay was lying on her bed doing something on her phone while she waited for you to get all your things together. Quickly, you pulled the little black vent-book out of your purse along with a pen and opened it to a random page.
Instead of seeing your distinct handwriting on the pages, paragraphs of emotions splayed out on the lined paper, there was extremely messy words written in small little blurbs. When you looked at them closer, you saw they rhymed.
Wow darling, congratulations! I don't think pride covers how I feel right now. You are so, so powerful and stronger than you know for the battles you've fought. You are endlessly brave, no matter what happens from here on out. I love you so much, and I'm so excited for you xx
“Don’t know where he’s been, or where he’s going but he is restless at night ‘cause he has horrible dreams
"I don’t know what we’re Doing, I don’t know what we’ve done. But the fire is coming so I think we should run.”
Fandom: Teen Wolf
Warnings: mention of Anxiety, depression (??) and hopelessness also blood and death
A/N: so…I realized how many Teen Wolf and Stiles imagines I’ve been writing and I guess I want to apologize. I’ve just recently gotten into the show and Stiles is my love so I just get all these good ideas with him but if you have any requests for other fandoms or other characters please don’t hesitate to do so :) I hope you enjoy this, I was really excited to write this one xx
You’ve noticed the shift in Stiles’ behavior for quite some time now. Ever since the nogitsune incident he just hasn’t been the same though he tried desperately to pretend nothing had changed. No one else seemed to notice, or they just didn’t want to bring it up. But you were more observant when it came to Stiles.
You noticed how distant he’s been, how forced his actions have become like he’s trying desperately to be himself again. You’ve noticed how he’ll space out for the longest time just staring into abyss.
His anxiety has obviously gotten worse and you didn’t need to be a werewolf to figure that out so the fact that no one else was speaking up about this concerned you.
Not to mention his random disappearances for days at a time. You’re not sure where he goes during these breaks but he’s all you can think about while he’s gone. When he comes back he acts as if nothing had happened.
Nights are especially bad for the boy. Every time you end up staying the night you’re awoken by his screams and practically have to smack him awake. You both end up laying there together until morning, neither of you saying a word, neither of you having to.
One day, you went over to Stiles’ and let yourself in his room. You were completely askew by the sight your eyes landed on.
Stiles’ hands were covered in blood, his hair was left flat to his forehead and his clothes were covered in dirt. You could hear his heart thumping loudly in his chest as he searched for something. A bloody tool sat clutched in his hands.
“Stiles…” You muttered, not leaving your position from the doorway, “What did you do?”
He looked up abruptly, obviously surprised by your appearance.
“I-I don’t…” He shook his head running a bloody hand through the nest on his head causing it to stick up. “I just…I got angry. I-I couldn’t control it Y/N. I c-I couldn’t control myself. I tried.”
Tears streamed your boyfriends face and you felt your heart shatter for him. He collapsed to his knees dropping the bloody weapon. “I don’t know what’s happening to me!” He cried out. “There’s this…this sick darkness growing inside of me an…and I can’t–”
He stopped himself as his sobs grew louder and more constant. You rushed to his side and grabbed his hands despite the sticky evidence that remained on them.
“Hey, Stiles, look at me.” You grabbed his face and made his honey brown eyes meet with yours.
His cheeks were stained with dirt and blood that washed away as his tears fell over them, one after the other in an uncontrollable pattern.
“Stiles it’ll be okay.”
“I killed someone Y/N! It’s not going to be okay. It’s never going to be okay again.” Stiles said pushing your hand away. He stumbled backwards to lean against his bed. “I killed someone in cold blood because I was angry. And…and I hate that I liked it.”
“We can fix you, Stiles. We can fix this like every other time.” You said, hopefully. Part of you didn’t believe what you were saying but you needed to have some hope.
You loved Stiles too much to let him go this easily.
“Damn it, Y/N!” He raised his voice as he slammed down on the floor. “There’s no fixing me! Don’t you see?! This isn’t something we can fix! This is me now!” He pointed to himself as he leaned forward. “This is who I am. And because I don’t want to hurt you, or anyone else…I’m leaving.”
He stood up and walked to his dresser, pulling out his clothes.
A thick sheet of silence fell over the room as you thought about what you were going to do. You couldn’t lose Stiles. He was your everything and you decided you’d do anything for him.
You stood up and walked over to the boy you’ve spent your whole life loving. You gingerly placed a hand on his shoulder. “Then I’m leaving with you.”
Stiles stopped his packing and gave a cynical smile you couldn’t see. You were clay in his maniacal hands, ready for him to sculpt you in any possible way he could think of. Ready for his corruption.
Returning to his façade, he dropped his smirk returning to the weak, broken and teary eyed boy he use to be. His head turned slightly to the side. “You realize it will only get worse, the real fire has just begun.”
Hiii soo how do you even start to learn a new language? I've been wanting to learn Spanish but I just don't know how to learn it. I have Rosetta Stone and vocab books and flash cards but I'm still so ???. Also, do you know of any good Spanish langblrs? Thank you darling! xx
I have been so excited to answer this all day but I’ve been mobile! Now that I am on my laptop I can give you the answer you deserve!
Okay, so to start a new language what I do is just start with the basics like duolingo and memrise, there are apps for smartphones and desktop versions of both so you should be good to go. I don’t really study Spanish myself, but I follow quite a few langblrs who do. Here are a couple masterposts that have Spanish resources, and as many langblrs as I can follow that are studying Spanish as well. (Sorry if I miss anyone, please tag yourselves if I don’t!)