snob food

okay @marywisdom I now need a fic of Leonard Snart going to the WestAllen wedding.

  • Technically, he and Mick and Lisa weren’t invited, but that doesn’t matter, he forged an invitation and said that Barry’s third-removed cousin couldn’t make it, so he told them to go and have fun
    • Barry pulls Len aside and begs him not to ruin the wedding and Len is so offended
      • “As if I would ruin Iris’ special day, Barry. What kind of person do you think I am?”
  • Len and Mick in matching tuxes with little fire and ice lapel pins, Lisa in a gorgeous gold dress with matching jewelry
  • Lisa takes so many pictures at this wedding, so many. Of the bride and groom, the families, the reception, the cake (the cake has a glamor shot)
    • Also, she winked at Cisco from where he was standing with the grooms and there’s a great picture of him blushing.
    • She sat next to him during the reception
    • They danced together
  • Len and Mick are food snobs, you can’t tell me otherwise, especially Mick, and they manage to smuggle out three trays of hors d’oeuvres for later because that catering was damn good.
    • also they each got an extra piece of cake
      • “good job on finally tying the knot,” mick says, frosting in his teeth as he slaps Barry on the shoulder.
  • LEONARD SNART GIVES A TOAST TO BARRY AND IRIS
    • everyone’s slightly nervous and on edge because oh god
    • but it’s such a - nice - speech?
    • he mentions how Iris is the perfect person to balance out Barry, how she doesn’t take any shit and always finds a way to get things done regardless of the pressure on her head.
    • and that Barry is a good person and it rubs off on you whenever you spend too much time around him (”look at me,” he jokes) and that he wishes nothing but the best for both of them
    • and just when everyone starts tearing up he narrows his eyes and sends Barry a sneaky glare
      • “You better not screw this up, Barry, I’m only giving you one warning, or you’ll get frostbite in places where you really don’t want it. Iris, you call me if he messes up. Mazel tov.”
  • When Barry and Iris open wedding gifts later, they find an envelope with literally four thousand dollars in unmarked, non sequential hundred dollar bills with the note “don’t spend it all in one place ;)”
      • “p.s. don’t bother dusting for prints ;)”
    • Lisa gave Iris a beautiful gold necklace that has a huge amber crystal pendant. Iris’s thank-you note thanked her for the gift and let her know that she was sorry she had to return it to the museum.

Fic idea: Somebody who absolutely should not have touched the stove touched the stove, and now the entire kitchen is destroyed and has to be repaired.

In the meantime, the IPRE crew is forced to find other places to eat, and are collectively horrified to discover that the twins’ quality cooking has turned them into food snobs. The quest to find a decent meal grows increasingly desperate.

They try a steakhouse, and Magnus isn’t sure the steak is even beef because beef doesn’t usually bounce like that. Lucretia asked for macarons at the little bakery and was presented with macaroons - no one has any idea what she’s talking about when she explains the difference. Merle would kill for one actual fresh vegetable, just one. Davenport caves and decides to take the crew to the fanciest restaurant in the area, but the choice of wine paired with the meal is atrocious and he gives up. Barry tries to find the hole-in-the-wall local places on Lup’s advice, but all he finds is disappointment.

In show of supreme irony, the twins will eat practically anything. The food sucks, sure, but they’ll eat it. They are used to eating food that’s not as good as theirs, they have learned the art of eating to survive. They tell the crew to suck it up and the crew looks on in nauseated horror as they down every atrocious meal with relish.

anonymous asked:

modern au lily headcanons, go!

  • tiny barely five foot redheaded menace she has visible stretchmarks and is kinda on the chubby side. petunia used to call her a cherub which made her cry but now she’s like fuck yeah i’m awesome because fuck whatever her hate filled sister has to say
  • when she was fifteen she got an industrial piercing, and then she pierced her ears again a year later, and the day after her drunken boozy birthday bash she got her first tattoo
  • by the time she’s in her early twenties she has about 7 odd tats all over, some are watercolour, some are monochrome, they’re both hidden and out there for the world to see.
  • she owns about 50 different sundresses and she wears them all the time. fuck pants and fuck sitting like a lady. she paid good money for her underwear and they’re cute. the world deserves to see them.
  • she only wears chucks with them though. her wardrobe is bursting with dresses and skirts and the occasional romper, but she only owns like 3 pairs of shoes: some formal red bottom nude pumps that she saved up for years to buy, a pair of winter boots, and her banged up chucks.
  • james fucking trips over himself when he first sees her. she’s scary… but hot. it doesn’t help that it happens the first and last time she tries to dye her hair, so she’s sporting lilac streaks that clash something awful and guffawing loudly with sirius.
  • absolutely detests beer but will drink any kind of wine no matter how cheap or dry or disgusting it might be. she loves rosé and has like ten different bottles in her flat at all times.
  • speaking of her flat, it’s one room open concept kind of thing the size of a shoebox. she calls it minimalistic, but it’s because she’s a poor uni student. you don’t even have a proper bed frame evans jesus.
  • hates driving unless it’s getting to take sirius’ motorbike out for a spin. they have matching leather jackets. it’s fun.
  • she’s either an instagram beauty queen or a fucking mess there’s no in between. she doesn’t do make up often but when it does her eyeliner could massacre any man who looks her way and her highlight is brighter than the fucking sun. but most times she’s in mismatched knee socks, a dress, no bra, chapped lips, flushed cheeks, and frizzy hair.
  • has had instagram since it’s inception but only has 13 posts up, nine of which are books and coffee that she gets at remus’ shop. she always tags his shop’s official account in them.
  • uses facebook only once a month but she fucking spams everyone within half an hour before logging off again. also tags remus’ bookshop on there too with literary puns. he is not impressed. (she likes to post pictures of loaves of bread that look like dicks on peter’s bakery’s page but he blocked her so she resorts to tagging his personal account instead.)
  • she’s kind of a stoner. just a little bit. it started at a party back in uni and she doesn’t do it often, but she knows how to roll a blunt like a pro and has 7 ‘not the weed guy’ contacts on her phone.
  • because she always wears dresses she never has actual functional pockets so she’s always lugging around hug handbags filled with snacks, extra water bottles, a first aid kit, a power bank, extra pads and tampons, at least 5 different shades of red lipstick, and pretty much anything you could think of.
  • she’s a meme queen, always up to date on the latest meme and always sharing them on the groupchat. peter was scared of the spongebob one at first.
  • mooches off of james’ netflix account. he’s changed the password a hundred times but she’s always finding her way back in so he just gives up and lets her even though all she watches is repeats of brooklyn nine nine, parks and rec, and those weird food network things that he never understands.
  • she eats like a toddler, he idea of cooking is just like microwaveable chicken nuggets or something. and she will eat anything once it’s covered in salt or ketchup. it drives sirius ‘food snob’ black crazy because ‘no lily you have chicken mcnuggets and stirfry mixed together what the fuck
  • her bad eating habits also drive james ‘health conscious nerd’ potter up a wall because ‘what do you mean breakfast was five rice kripsy treats and a pack of thin mints oh my god you’re going to get diabetes before you’re thirty’
  • he starts buy her groceries after that and she would be upset but she’s a cheapskate so the money she would have spent goes towards her new phone fund because she’s been using a shitty little android for 3 years it’s time for an upgrade.
  • of course, she doesn’t know about half the shit james buys (what the fuck is chia seeds potter?’ ‘put them in your water and drink it’ ‘it’s disgusting’ ‘it’s healthy.’ ‘i rather eat a triple cheeseburger and die at the ripe old age of 32′)
  • she doesn’t know how to cook it either so that means he’s over cooking for her most nights. the two of them together. alone.
  • he grudgingly grows to like rosé
  • lily asks him out after a month or so very cool and casually like ‘oh hey you know if we were dating you could just stay over instead of taking the train back home we should do that it would solve a lot of problems.’
  • it makes him drop the rice he’s working on, but it doesn’t matter because dinner is cold as a dog’s nose by the time they’re ready for it if ya catch my drift.

look ok, i just want them to have a lazy morning where killian is wearing only sweatpants, hair a mess, bags under his eyes from his and emma’s late night activities, standing at the kitchen counter putting together all the ingredients for a fancy breakfast quiche (because Food Snob) and emma wandering downstairs in her camisole and sleep shorts and her hair in a quickly pulled together high bun, and she just plants her face between his shoulder blades and wraps her arms around him and runs her fingers through his chest and belly hair and he grins and lets her feel him up and cling to his back while he pops the food in the oven and then he finally turns and buries his face in her neck ughhh

@ladyleanam so i finished my midterms this afternoon and guess what i did tonight lol

MURDER ON THE ORIENT EXPRESS

  • Hercule Poirot is such a food snobTM
  • I laughed every time Poirot is being, well, Poirot.
  • I’ve lost count of how many times he asked someone to straighten their tie lol
  • Since we’ve all read the story the plot is not much of a surprise but it’s still quite a fun ride.  It got slightly heavy in the end but basically Poirot’s a constant delight for me. (I love him.)
  • Who the hell is Katherine though??  I don’t remember her from the books?  In the movie Poirot occasionally held the picture of a woman name Katherine and I think it’s implied he (might have once) loved her but according to my memory from the books the only woman Poirot ever loved was the Russian Countess Vera Rossakoff?
  • “So that’s it then?  You don’t like my dirty money?” “It’s far more personal than that.  I don’t like your face.” ICONIC.
  • the governess is hella pretty
  • i LOVE mrs hubbard 
  • (and the countess!!)
  • (but also the secretary)
  • lastly the scenes are so beautiful tho i want to ride a train across europe now

stop pretending that sirius black isn’t a food snob and that it Kills him that lily puts ketchup on practically everything

saraph  asked:

I dunno if this is something you guys can help me with, but I need a job. And I'm absolutely sick of working for scumbag corporations that don't give a single shit about me. I never finished college, not any real skills to speak of, I'm a huge introvert with anxiety and I hate talking to people, and I'm pretty weak physically. Any suggestions? :/

This is just my suggestions, followers can chime in with ideas, but maybe a kitchen? You don’t necessarily have to work for like a Chili’s, you can find a nice local place that you like to work at. Sometimes they’re pretty chill to work at. Also, like working in the kitchen is fucking great when it comes to ignoring people. That’s one of the main reasons I work in the back, you only have to deal with a few people and for the most part they just want to work and go home. 

ALSO you don’t need any experience usually. When I started working in the kitchen I just told them that I cooked at home and they hired me and taught me what I needed. That’s how it is for most people in the back and a lot of us can move up in the kitchen the more experience you get. 

Another added bonus is that you can sometimes take food home. Orders that are wrong and get sent back, when too much of an item is ordered, when a special doesn’t sell, or sometimes the owners are just cool with you taking food home. This has really helped me out in the past. 

Bake Off star Ruby Tandoh slams Nigella Lawson and Jamie Oliver for failing to back Jeremy Corbyn

Great British Bake Off star Ruby Tandoh has hit out at television chefs including Nigella Lawson and Jamie Oliver for failing to publicly endorse Labour. 

Ms Tandoh, who is supporting Jeremy Corbyn, accused top chefs of being “suspiciously silent” because they “don’t want to lose out” on Tory voters buying their cookbooks. 

She said on Twitter that “silence makes you a Tory”, adding: “If u [sic] think some ideological non-partisan thing is more valuable than getting a Labour govt in, get lost.”

imagine being silent on this incredibly important election just cos you don’t wanna lose out on a couple of tories buying your cookbook

— Ruby Tandoh (@rubytandoh)

June 8, 2017

She singled out Mr Oliver, Ms Lawson, the Hairy Bikers and Nigel Slater as she pressed them to go public with their views. She called Mr Oliver a “p****”.

She added: “I’d ask paul hollywood why he hasn’t publicly stood up for the many (not the few) but i got blocked long ago  lol.”

She said on Twitter: “Lots of big names staying suspiciously silent today despite their entire fortune/following being built on a ~kind and inclusive~ ethos.

Nigella Lawson

sorry but silence makes you a tory. if u think some ideological non-partisan thing is more valuable than getting a Labour govt in, get lost

— Ruby Tandoh (@rubytandoh)

June 8, 2017

"Imagine being silent on this incredibly important election just cos you don’t wanna lose out on a couple of tories buying your cookbook.”

The Great British Bake Off finalist has a history of hitting out at fellow cooks and food writers.

Jamie Oliver

She previously accused Ms Lawson and Tom Kerridge of being the “dull snobs” of the food World.

In a series of Tweets last month she criticised “horsey-maned rich girls” and “pompous ‘real food’ guys” .

imagine being silent on this incredibly important election just cos you don’t wanna lose out on a couple of tories buying your cookbook

— Ruby Tandoh (@rubytandoh)

June 8, 2017

She criticised female food writers for “Marie Antoinetting”, claiming they cooked for a hobby but were too well-off to actually cook the family dinner themselves.

She said: “Horsey-maned rich girls and pompous 'real food’ guys, all of them white, make up nearly all of the food world and i am so BORED of it.”

Earlier this year, Tandoh branded Ella Mills, known as Deliciously Ella, “dangerous as f—” for making money from the “wellness craze”.

And last month she refused an invitation to appear on Good Morning Britain, saying: “Piers Morgan is a sentient ham and frankly I’d rather die.”

Last year, Tandoh shared her true thoughts on Great British Bake Off judge Paul Hollywood, calling him a “peacocking manchild”.

    When I say Oliver should fight for Felicity...

    There has been a lot of debate in the fandom for over a year now about whether Oliver should’ve fought harder to make things right with Felicity after the breakup. Everyone has their own definition of what “fighting for Felicity” means, and I won’t speak for everyone. I can only speak for myself and relay my own hopes and frustrations.

    Today @emilytbett was nice enough to share with us the autographed script she received of 4x16 in which Olicity recite their vows.

    It was actually so beautiful and amazing to see how the actors contributed to the script and really made the characters come to life in that scene. I think we all needed to see this and be reminded of why we’ve been staying with the show even when we want to scream and throw things at the TV.

    There are many reasons why I’ve been upset this season and why I felt like I was pushed to my limit with 5x15. And it’s seeing this beautiful script and what we could’ve had that has made it hit home. I am one of those fans that strongly believes Oliver should’ve fought for Felicity, especially after he said these vows. With lines like “You will always be the best thing about me for the rest of my life” and “I will never lie to you again. Ever, ever again,” how could we not believe Oliver would’ve done everything in his power to make things right with the love of his life?

    Originally posted by yet-i-remain-quiet

    Some fans argue that Felicity firmly closed the door on a reconciliation, and it wouldn’t have been right for Oliver to pursue her. But fighting for Felicity, to me, was never about Oliver coming on too strong or pressuring her to give him another chance romantically. I actually think the two did need to take a break and be apart for a while during hiatus. They both had a lot of heartache and issues to process and work through individually.

    But where I think the writers truly did the characters and fans a disservice in Season 5 is by not having Oliver become a living embodiment of these vows. Flirting with Felicity and asking her out was not how Oliver needed to fight for Felicity. To truly make things right, he first needed to apologize for lying. A simple, heartfelt “I’m sorry” to show that he was genuinely remorseful and understood how he hurt her. Nothing is more powerful than actually hearing the one you love say the words.  

    Then, every day after that, Oliver needed to show he’d changed through his actions. That meant being a good friend and partner by making sure Felicity had support after her paralysis, job loss, and Havenrock. If anyone understands the effects of trauma, it’s Oliver. They didn’t have to be big scenes because, let’s be honest, Arrow more often than not has issues with pacing and giving sufficient time to hit the emotional beats. These moments are usually small but powerful blips that we either re-watch or gif the heck out of to catch all of the subtle nuances. But small, consistent moments of Oliver asking about Felicity’s day or if she’s okay when she seems off would’ve gone a long way. Heck, even something as simple as bringing her a coffee or Big Belly Burger (I know he’s a food snob but Felicity loves the salt and grease) after a long day would’ve meant a lot.

    In turn, we needed to see Oliver being more open and honest with Felicity about his past and how he felt going forward facing various challenges (both as the mayor and Green Arrow). We saw a promising glimpse of that in 5x02 when he mentioned the Bratva to her.

    Originally posted by lyricalarrow

    However, he reverted to old habits in 5x04 when he lied about rescuing Dig. Maybe Felicity does need to be the one to make the first move and give Oliver a sign that she’d be open to giving him a second chance, but it’s a total Catch-22. Oliver can’t make a move until Felicity is ready, but Felicity probably won’t be ready until she sees an actual positive change in Oliver.

    Unfortunately, I don’t think we’ve seen that positive change yet. If anything, it seems to me like the writers have regressed Oliver yet again (maybe even more than in the past). Having him apologize and doggedly pursue another woman who isn’t even worthy of the effort sends the wrong message. Watching Oliver do this for another woman (one that Felicity knows is shady and has hurt people she’s cared about) does not communicate to Felicity that he’s thinking clearly or learned from past mistakes. I won’t even get into Oliver asking her to help him fix things with EWR, because there aren’t enough words to describe my utter disgust with that move. I think it hurt Felicity way more than she let on to see Oliver fighting for someone else but not even attempting to apologize to her for his lies or obliviousness to her pain after he “killed” Billy. In seeing Oliver put his own needs above hers yet again, I think it became the deciding factor (or last straw) in Felicity seeking support elsewhere and joining Helix. And until we see Oliver man up and stop being so self-absorbed, the “rebuild” just isn’t going to be effective.

    Oliver and Felicity do love each other. They’re soulmates. No one can convince me otherwise. Seeing the 4x16 script reaffirmed the deep love they shared, and I’m not saying they can’t get back to that. But it’s going to take time and effort. I think a single conversation won’t be enough to fix them this time. The reason Season 2 and, yes, Season 3 (despite the angst) were so great for Olicity was because the subtle moments (though they tortured us at times) slowly added up and fit perfectly into the big picture of their relationship. The rebuild has to be the same way and, personally, too much bad drama in Season 5 has happened for me to feel good about a reunion just yet. Oliver still has to be a better man so that he can realistically pull Felicity out of the darkness that’s consuming her. Blind optimism (blatantly trusting the wrong people) is not living in the light, and his actions have to start reflecting the change he’s claiming to make. It’s the only way he can even deserve the possibility of a second chance with Felicity. Right now, I’m hoping that by the finale Olicity have grown individually and we get an ending similar to Season 2 where there’s a strong indication of a reunion coming in Season 6.

    Will the writers actually do this? Who knows?! The Olicity love is definitely there and if the writers know what’s good for them (and their ratings), they’ll quit their failed experiment and actually embrace the elements that made this show so successful in the first place. How this plays out will be a mystery until the finale but what’s an absolute necessity for me as a viewer is seeing Oliver get out of his own way and fight for the woman he loves. Felicity deserves it. Oliver deserves it. We deserve it. And it’s totally okay to not accept anything less…

    Originally posted by organas

    Honestly, I don’t think you guys realize how important the Soul’s-mom-is-of-Italian-descent headcanon is to me. Especially since I think the Evans family isn’t an abusive family as much as Mama and Papa Evans didn’t know how to raise Soul because he was so vastly different from Wes. Like, so many things fall into place perfectly for me with these two little tidbits in my imagining of Soul’s glorious family and his home life with Maka.

    • His maternal grandmother, although came into wealth when she became famous for her opera talents, lived a comfortably modest childhood in Siracusa, Sicily. Even after moving to America, some things never changed (like growing all of her herbs and canning her own tomatoes for sauce. She also was the only one to make sauce; she didn’t trust her cooks for the staple part of the meal.)
    • She also gets very sad because she tried to get Wes and Soul to call her Nana but it didn’t stick and somehow Gran did.
    • Gran taught Mama Evans how to cook and bake delicious things. She later taught Soul and Wes.
    • Later on, when Soul was like 7 and Wes 12, Gran and Mama and the boys would bake and Papa Evans would play fun little ditties on the piano.
    • Soul loved young childhood. He started hating it when he started comparing himself to Wes.
    • Nobody else really did.
    • Gran loves the shit outta her baby boy.
    • Wes loves cooking. Baking bores him.
    • Soul is a stress baker, even though he doesn’t really care for too many sweets.
    • Maka, on the other hand, love pastries. But not the overly sweet ones. Sheet cakes make her sad because the frosting is overwhelming.
    • One evening Soul made Maka homemade sauce – 
    • (”Soul, you literally made enough pasta to last us the month. What the hell are we going to do with this?” “The fuck are you talking about, Maka? This is like a seventh of what my Gran makes back home!” “How the hell are you so skinny???”) 
    • – they were discussing Italian desserts and Soul brought up how Cassata Cake is his favorite dessert, like ever, and Maka cringed because the only “Cassata Cake” she ever had was the much more Americanized version with fruits and whipped cream and custard (”and while it’s good for a few bites, Jesus Soul, it’s wayyyy too sweet”) and Soul was like “no, like the cake that’s more like a Cannoli” and Maka had never one and Soul was
    • HORRIFIED
    • And literally drove to Death Mart immediately to get some maraschino cherries, ricotta cheese (”Maka if you pronounce it as Rick-otta one more time I swear I’m going to cry”), heavy whipping cream, bittersweet chocolate, and cake flour and got to work as soon as he got home.
    • “Soul what the fuck I’m too full to have dessert tonight, let alone two different ones.” “Nonsense Maka I’m only making the cake tonight and you’ll be hungry when this is done in three hours.” “Soul we have school in the morning!” “This is important you uncultured swine!”
    • When the cake was done at like 2 am, Maka admitted that it was sort of worth it.

    Admittedly this was mostly because all I could think of for a moment was Maka not knowing what the other Cassata Cake was and Soul being horrified.

    But I do almost always headcanon that Mama Evans (whose name always changes) is Sicilian Italian.

    @nobuo-fujita said: Jet as a chef reminds me of Gordon Ramsey for some reason. All he needs is the motherfuckin’ lamb sauce, and then he’s set for feeding his entire family/friends.


    You’re correct. 

    I didn’t do it intentionally, but Jet is basically the Remnant Gordon Ramsay. Ginormous food snob and only uses fresh ingredients or produce he has grown himself, he is skeptical of other peoples cooking skills and really doesn’t enjoy eating food he hasn’t made, save the few exceptions when he finds other cooking genius’s.

    In his restaurant, “Pitch-Black”, he will chastise his employee’s for doing something incorrectly or for making simple mistakes. When he’s mad, he doesn’t scream, but you almost wish he would. Maybe you’d feel better, then.

    He’s a professional cook who ends up being a published writer (for food and cooking of course) and his restaurant earns one Michelin star after only three years into the business. He is hard on his team but none of them would ever say anything bad about him. Jet is a true master chef, his employees and team always enjoy the passion he exudes. The team is motivated easily by his energy, and are often mesmerized when they watch him cook.