snape earring

Do you think that when McGonagall really got tired of his colleagues shit she just turned into a cat and started doing random cat things? Like:

Dumbledore: Minerva, please, I really have to send those letters
McGonagall: *gets more comfy over Dumbledore’s desk*
Dumbledore: Minerva
McGonagall: *starts chewing on a nearby quill*

Umbridge: why are the cushions in my office so ruined? Who is responsible for this?
Every other teacher:*glances to McGonagall*
McGonagall:*cleans her nails*

Snape: Minerva get out of that jar now I need it
Snape: you are far too old for such antics
Snape: I’ll stop taking points from Longbottom for a week, is that enough?
McGonagall:*flicks her ear*
Snape:…how did you even get inside there
McGonagall:*meows and burrows deeper in the jar*

Tease // Draco Malfoy

Request: Can you by chance write a dirty imagine with draco? ;)

Writing smuts is my specialty dear ;) Though this was the dirtiest I’ve ever written


You were in class for Potions, and damn it was freaking boring. You didn’t understand a thing and you were about to sleep. You felt your eyes closing until you felt something on your thighs. You looked down and saw Draco’s hand rubbing your thighs. He was your partner, and having your friend with benefits as your partner has it’s ups and downs. Especially when you’re sitted at the very back.

You were swatting his hand away from your thighs, and it kept you awake. But the more you tried to swat it away, the more he’ll run his hand on you. It was a major turn on for you right now. “Draco. Stop” You hissed at him and he was just smirking. “Yes, miss Y/L/N?” Professor Snape asked.

“Nothing sir” You mumbled.

“Very well, as I was saying…” He continued something you had no interest on. Draco’s hand was under your skirt and was going up. He slipped his hand under your panty and you squirmed. “Hmm… You’re so wet for me Y/N” he whispered in your ear when Snape wasn’t looking. He started inserted a finger in you and pumping slowly.

You started breathing quickly, trying not to make a noise. You bit your lip hard as his pumping accelerated and added another digit in you. “Draco… Please. N-not now” You stuttered through the pleasure you were feeling. He removed his hand and started playing with your clit. He added pressure and you closed you eyes shut.

“Class dismissed” Snape said in his usual monotone voice. Draco removed his hand and started sucking his fingers. “You taste good” He said with his signature smirk. “Wanna skip dinner?” Thank Merlin’s, Potions was your last subject so you don’t have to wait to get him to bed.

“Okay, but I’m getting you for this” You threatened but he just grinned at you.

Both of you ran to the Slytherin common room and went up to his room. You locked the door and kissed him hard. “I hate you Draco” You said in between kisses. “For what you did, you deserve some punishment” You were stripping his shirt off but leaving on only his tie. You kissed him again as you untie his tie.

“Hands at the back” You ordered and he obeyed. You tied his hands tightly with his tie and pushed him on the bed. You saw a tent being created on his pants and you smirked. You straddled him, towering him. But you were just smirking down. “Do something Y/N!” He was desperate for you. You shook your head. You started stripping down in front of him until you were left wearing a black laced bra and underwear.

“Like it?” You asked seductively and he was breathing quickly. “Shit Y/N. PLEASE” You loved teasing him so much. It felt so good. You grope your boobs and started massaging it. “Wish it was your hands?” You teased and he closed his eyes shut. You looked down at his pants and it was about to rip. You unbuckled his belt and pulled everything down.

His dick was an angry shade of red and you felt satisfied with yourself. You went down and licked his head. Pre-cum was already flowing out from it. Light kissed on his head when he started groaning and moving his hips forward but you pushed it down. “Control it Draco” You said then went back to his dick. You licked his huge dick and wrapped your mouth around it.

You were sucking and bobbed you cheeks. “Y/N!! UGH!” He groaned loudly and you removed your mouth from him. “I don’t think you deserve to come yet” You said and bit your lip in a seductive manner. “PLEASE Y/N, OH MY GOD” He groaned.

“But I like seeing you helpless” You pouted and removed your bra. You threw it in some place of the room and went on top of him. You kissed him hard while teasing with your boobs. You knew that he wanted to touch you so badly but you wouldn’t allow it. Not now. You kissed his neck and left love bites. “Don’t leave-ugh fuck” You knew how much he hated it when you leave hickeys, his friends always teases him about him. But he’d never tell who gave it since he doesn’t want people to have a bad impression on you. Sweet.

You removed your underwear and you wear naked in front of him. You went down again and jacked him slowly. “Do you like this hmm..?” You teased with a sugar sweet tone. “YES Y/N” He said loudly and you knew that he was about to come, so you stopped. “It’s better to come when you’re inside me you know” You winked at him.

“Then let me!” His breathing was going fast and beads of sweat were on his forehead. This time, you agreed. You aligned yourself with him and let him go through. You reached for his back and got the off with one pull and his hands were on your boobs. You moved slowly and you started moaning loudly. But then you pulled out, cause you want to see what will happen next. His sat up straight and kissed you hard. You tongues were fighting already and he wrapped his arms around. He pulled you close then laid you softly on the bed.

“Let me do this part” he whispered and you smiled. He inserted himself inside you again and he was thrusting, usually it would be rough but this was different. It was slow and you can see passion in his eyes. But eventually, his accelerated his pace and you were a moaning mess already. “D-Draco-Ugh! FUCK” You screamed the last part loudly as you came. He came shortly after and he dropped right beside you, both of you panting.

“I love you Y/N” he blurted.

“W-what?” You thought you misheard him saying that he loves you. He looked at in your eyes and said it again. “I love you Y/N. Not just as a friend, but as in like, love” You never thought those words would actually come out from his mouth.

“I love you too Draco” You said and he kissed you lightly. He placed the blankets on top of both you and he pulled you close to him as if you’re the only thing that matters.

Fake notes real feelings

Fandom: Harry Potter
Character(s): Snape, reader, [brother] Sirius, James, Remus and Peter
Warning(s): None
Requested by: Anon-Sorry to bug you but I was wondering if I could request a Snape reader insert set during the Marauders era? One where The Mauraders know that Snape has a crush on Reader so they send him a note telling him to met her next to the lake as a prank but Reader finds the letter and rushes to the lake to tell Snape that she likes him too and to yell at the Marauders (can the Reader be Sirius’ sister?)
Writer: Asteria
Word count:1,724
A/N: Hope you like it.

The four boys were gathered around a table, all of them snickering and whispering among themselves as they argued over what to write, the quill not yet touching the piece of parchment in front of them “Sirius should write it” Peter spoke quietly as to not draw any attention to the group, although with their track record they could just be walking down the hallway and someone would get suspicious of them . 

“Why should I write it?” Sirius asked waking the back of his hand against Remus’ and Peters’ arm “because you’re [Y/N] brother and you can do her handwriting as if she actually wrote it” James said jabbing his index finger on the paper in front of him, with a sigh Sirius rolled his eyes and snatched the quill from Remus hand and dipped it into the ink pot, Remus chuckled and leaned against the table with his elbows resting on top of it.

“What do I write?” Sirius breathed out a bit of ink dropping onto the paper “whatever you think [Y/N] would write” Remus replied a wide smile spreading across their faces, Sirius tipped his head to the side and shook his head, his black slightly wavy hair falling in front of his face as he leaned down and pressed the tip of the quill to the paper quickly writing a note out for none other than Snape, who’s had a crush on you for a couple of years now, each of them didn’t need to guess it, they could see how much Snape liked you and yet you couldn’t which they found rather odd seeing as it was so sickly obvious. 

‘Dear Snape,
I have something to tell you, I know you have a crush on me, 
please meet me at the lake today at 7 O’Clock.
From [Y/N]’

“Really? Snape? He’d see through that in a second” James complained in a hushed tone, Sirius glared at his friend and scribbled lines through it before writing is name, dropping the quill into the ink pot and pushed the paper along the table “short and sweet…..just like your sister” Peter joked, Sirius frowned and crossed his arms as he stood up “who’s going to deliver it?” asked Sirius watching as James folded the paper and placed it into a white envelope folding the flap over “what do you mean who’s going to deliver it?” asked Remus who was now stood by James, Peter and Sirius both looking at the two of them as if they didn’t know the answer “all of us” answered James simply with a mischievous grin waving the envelope that was between his fingers in the air.

You had finished in the library after brushing up on something that was of complete and utter importance…to you anyway it was just to brush up on a potion that you should already know off by heart but you may have forgotten some of the ingredients used in it and went for a little walk as you usually would after spending a few hours in the library.

You sighed happily and hurried down the hallway dark clouds started to roll in, crossing over the main court yard you stopped mid stride turning your head to see a bit of paper, it’s corners were flapping in the gentle wind.

You were never one to read private letters to someone else, you weren’t completely like your brother, but that didn’t stop curiosity from  creeping up on you and completely taking over, you span around in a circle on the balls of your feet, your hair whipping around your face you stepped forwards taking one more glance around the empty court yard before picking up the letter and turning it over to see what was written on there. 

Your eyes scanned over the rather short note a frown appearing on your face, you had no memory of writing the note or even giving it to Snape “oh you have got to be kidding me” you said as realisation hit you, the reason you couldn’t remember writing it was because you didn’t and the only other person who could copy your hand writing so convincingly was Sirius, you dropped the letter to the floor and bolted across the court yard, you were going to be late and you didn’t want Snape to be disappointed when you didn’t show up.

You have never run this far in your whole entire life, so when you reached the lake, the dark clouds looming above your head threatening to rain, in the distance you spotted who you hoped was Snape walking along the side of the lake his head hung low, hair falling in front of his face, you sucked in a deep breathe before jogging over to him, gripping your books tightly in your hands.

“Severus!” you called waving your hands in the air to get his attention, his head snapping up at the sound of his name and your voice, a smile slowly spreading across his face “I-I’m so sorry I’m late, I lost track of time in the library” you breathed out as you came to a stop in front of him, leaning forwards you placed your hands on your knees and sucked in a few deep breathes.

Snape placed a hand on your shoulder “are you okay?” he asked his voice full of concern you nodded your head and waved a hand “yeah, I’m fine” you responded breathlessly still trying your best to get air into your lungs after the rather long run “you don’t look fine” he told you, you just shrugged your shoulders and straightened up giving him your best smile “I’m fine, really no need to be so concerned” Snape with drew his hand and coughed rubbing the back of his head awkwardly “what is it that you wanted to talk to me about?”.

Your eyebrows knitted together, cocking your head to the side as you blinked at him for a moment “you said to meet you here because you have something to tell me” he reminded you, you jumped and slapped the palm of your hand on your books smiling “right of course!” you exclaimed happily, Snape took a small step back.

“I wanted to tell you that I like you too, I thought that if I said in a letter you wouldn’t believe me, so I wrote you a note to meet me here and gave it to my brother to give you, at least I hope he did give it you, it would have been really awkward if it was some one else” you rambled,  brushing your hair behind your ears, Snape stood there quietly looking at you “I don’t think I believe it even now” he whispered, you stopped talking and closed your mouth, you felt a  pang of rejection in the pit of your stomach and gulped.

“It’s true Severus, please believe me” you said looking at hi with sad eyes, you really did like him and you were always so nice to him, even when your brother and his friends were being complete jerks to him “I really do have a crush on you, you can even ask my friends, by Merlin’s beard Severus I love you!” you told him, throwing your hands into the air, the last three words grabbed his attention, he had to ask what the last three words were multiple times to be sure he actually heard you right.

You had all four times repeated the last three words to him and when he was finally happy he smiled widely at you “I never thought I’d hear you say that or that you even like me the same way” he responded, you smiled back warmly and pulled him into a hug “of course I do, why on earth wouldn’t I?” you asked him, pushing him back and keeping him at arms length “I don’t know” he mumbled as a reply, you shook your head and ruffled his hair up “you should be going back Severus, it’s getting late and the perfect prefects will be out wandering around” you said rising to your tip toes and pressing a kiss to his pale cheek, Snape blushing a bright red. 

“What about you?” he asked, you shot him a smirk “I have something to do, I’ll talk to you tomorrow” Snape just nodded his head slowly before walking past you, you looked over your shoulder at him and gave him a smile as he turned around looking at you, raising one had and giving it a slight wave, which you returned.

You waited until you knew Snape was gone to call out to the four culprits “Snuffles, Prancer, Wolfie and Wormtail” you were more than mad, you were fuming and you knew they’d be watching after all it was suppose to be a horrible prank, but at least it back fired on them, as if on cue the four of them appeared from behind the trees. 

“I knew this was a bad idea” Peter whispered, James, Remus, and Sirius rolled their eyes “you were just as happy to do it as the rest of us” Sirius said between clenched teeth, you crossed your arms over your chest and glared at the four of them “do you know how mean that was?!” you snapped at them, all of them jumping at the tone of your voice “it was just a joke” James tried to reason with you, your glare intensified, you tapped your index finger on the spine of the book.

“Well it wasn’t funny!” you yelled throwing the book in your hand at them “it wasn’t funny when you wrote the note, it wasn’t funny when you just stood there and watched him while I wasn’t here, these jokes of yours” you started pointing a finger at all of them “they need to stop, it was lucky that I was actually planning on telling him how much I liked him other wise I would have felt really guilty”.

With that you turned you back on them “and bring my book back with you” you yelled storming off, James, Peter, Remus and Sirius stood there, their arms out in front of them as they watched you walk away “your sister needs to chill” Peter whispered which earned a slap around the head from Sirius himself. 

In Remembrance (although I didn’t write it, I believe it all and wish I wrote it)

In Remembrance to Severus Snape…
…A Slytherin who died like a Gryffindor…
…without all the red and gold crap.

In Remembrance to Fred Weasley…
…Who fought bravely to the very end….
…And whose jokes will forever brighten his other half…
…And will loyally await his soul mate and brother…
…with many jokes…
…he’s got forever to think of them, right?

In Remembrance to Dobby…
…Who was more free and full of love…
…than any elf, and most humans.

In Remembrance to Remus J. Lupin…
…the last real Marauder…
…who was not just a wonderful father…
….a incredible husband and brave hero…
…as well as a freakin’ awesome werewolf.

In Remembrance to Nymphadora Tonks…
…who died for ‘the greater good’…
…and would probably hex me for calling her Nymphadora.

In Remembrance of Alastor ‘Mad-Eye’ Moody…
…who’s motto ‘constant vigilance’ kept him alive…
…and scared the crap out of some kids too.

In Remembrance of Tom Marvelo Riddle a.k.a. Voldemort…
…who was pretty cool, and cute when he was younger…
…but who got his ass thoroughly kicked in the end

In Remembrance of Albus Dumbledore…
…whose past and wisdom confused us…
…whose seeming betrayal shocked us…
…but actually who turned out to be an okay guy in the end…
…despite the whole ‘almost killing Harry’ thing.

In Remembrance to Bellatrix Lestrange…
… because it’s was awesome how Molly slapped her with that Avada Kedavra!
…She deserved everything she got and more.

In Remembrance of Colin Creevey…
…who we really didn’t know too well…
…but took a lot of pictures and died fighting in a war…
…so he must’ve done something good…
…besides stalking Harry.

In Remembrance of Hedwig…
…Harry actual first friend…
…who lived and died soaring.

In Remembrance of George’s Ear…
…may he forever be ‘holey’…
…at least Fred has some company…
…a little piece of George, to last him forever.

Heavenly Commentary: Deathly Hallows Pt1
  • Sirius: I can't believe he broke the mirror.
  • James: Didn't really need it, did he?
  • Sirius: Still. I liked that mirror.
  • ***
  • Lily: That's a nice little tribute.
  • Albus: Yes. Elphias always was a generous man. Although Rita Skeeters is far more thrilling.
  • James: Harry thinks otherwise.
  • Albus: He will learn the truth. That no one is without regret. Rita Skeeter was surprisingly quick.
  • Cedric: Even dead we can't get rid of her.
  • ***
  • James: I never thought I'd see Harry trying so hard to save these people. After everything they’ve done to him.
  • Lily: Our son is better than us both.
  • ***
  • James: That was downright emotional for Dudley.
  • Albus: I imagine that he is beginning to see through the veil of his youth. One’s parents are not always correct.
  • ***
  • James: The guard is all here.
  • Lily: Obviously. Oh yeah. How was Moony’s wedding?
  • Sirius: Simple. You know him. Not an extravagant bone in his body.
  • James: I'm betting Tonks got an extravagant bon-OW!
  • Lily: Shut up!
  • ***
  • Cedric: Seven Harry Potters fly out of a house. What does Voldemort do?
  • Albus: He will assume they will give the real Harry to Alastor. As he is the strongest wizard present. He is unable to understand that strength is not the factor here.
  • Sirius: I don't understand. Who is taking Harry?
  • Albus: Hagrid of course. There is no one there who loves Harry quite like Hagrid.
  • ***
  • James: Even dead you're right.
  • Albus: It appears not all habits die hard.
  • ***
  • Lily: I have a bad feeling. Nothing is ever this easy.
  • James: Oh shit. No!
  • Hedwig: Hoot hoot.
  • Cedric: Trust me. I know.
  • ***
  • James: I thought he was going to die.
  • Lily: How did Harry do that? He didn't look in any shape to defend himself.
  • Albus: I have my theories. But imagine the suspense if I choose not to share them.
  • Sirius: I never said this when we were alive but, you're a dick.
  • Alastor: I said that constantly.
  • Albus: Old friend! It's terrible to see you here. Welcome to the party.
  • Alastor: Where are we?
  • Albus: The next great adventure. Your appearance is rather disconcerting with two normal eyes.
  • ***
  • Lily: Poor George.
  • James: Everyone is going crazy. They've been betrayed.
  • Sirius: And of course Snape cursed his ear off. Part of the plan Albus?
  • Albus: Let's find out.
  • ***
  • Alastor: Grieve later fools. Fight the war now.
  • Cedric: Constant vigilance?
  • Alastor: Exactly.
  • ***
  • James: Remus says Harry is like me and yet he makes it sound like an insult.
  • Lily: Because it was. Something is broken inside of him.
  • ***
  • Sirius: They've done all this?
  • James: They're children going to war. What do you expect?
  • ***
  • Lily: That had the feeling of a kiss goodbye.
  • Alastor: Smart girl.
  • ***
  • James: Happy birthday harry.
  • Lily: He's all grown up now.
  • James: But he's still our boy.
  • ***
  • Sirius: You left them stuff?
  • Albus: But of course. A few trinkets I hope will be of use. Oh Rufus. If only you put this energy into helping me.
  • ***
  • James: The Snitch he swallowed. Damn it but that's genius.
  • Albus: Thank you.
  • Lily: “I open at the close”?
  • Albus: I have always appreciated a healthy use of theatricality.
  • ***
  • Lily: Of course Luna would recognise him. I really do adore that girl.
  • ***
  • James: Do you remember our wedding?
  • Lily: I'll never forget it.
  • James: I wish we could have had something like this. Not the rushed one we had.
  • Lily: It was perfect and I'll never think otherwise.
  • ***
  • Albus: Ah fate. It is always nice to know when one is on the right path.
  • Sirius: ...ok?
  • ***
  • Lily: Oh...Albus is this tr-
  • Alastor: Enough.
  • Cedric: But Prof-
  • Alastor: Enough! There are bigger problems right now.
  • James: The Ministry has fallen.
  • Cedric: Then it's over.
  • Albus: No Mr Diggory. Now it begins.
  • ***
  • Alastor: Excellent Miss Granger. She's prepared.
  • ***
  • Cedric: Why are they being so nice?
  • Sirius: It’s not actually mercy if they can't actually kill them.
  • ***
  • Albus: Charming, Alastor. But those would not stop Severus. Given his innocence they wouldn't need to.
  • Alastor: What?
  • Cedric: I'll fill you in.
  • Hedwig: Hoot.
  • ***
  • James: Oh man, do you remember that picture?
  • Sirius: Last day of our first year. We were children.
  • James: But not for very long
  • ***
  • Lily: I remember that letter. What happened to the rest of it?
  • James: Probably Snape. Greasy bastard.
  • Albus: ...
  • Sirius: Just because he's on a secret mission to save the world doesn't mean he can't be a bastard.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Regulus, oh God. You did...why didn't you tell me?
  • James: Like Hermione said. He was trying to protect you
  • Albus: Did you find your younger brother Mr Black?
  • Sirius: No.
  • Albus: Wherever he is, I honour him. I would never have been able to drink that potion alone.
  • ***
  • Lily: Oh
  • James: Why would he...
  • Lily: Har- oh no.
  • Sirius: Moony...
  • James: You did good Harry. You did the right thing.
  • ***
  • James: No. No!
  • ***
  • Alastor: Fools! Do they think these kids are going to school?
  • Sirius: They don't think. Wow, Kreacher looks...happy.
  • Cedric: I guess that's what happens when you're treated with common decency.
  • ***
  • Lily: Do you think they're ready?
  • Alastor: As ready as they'll ever be.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Don't ask a teenage boy what he was doing in the bathroom, Hermione. You may not like the answer.
  • Lily: I swear I will hit you.
  • ***
  • Albus: Let the games begin.
  • ***
  • Lily: Those are muggle bodies. I think I'm going to be sick.
  • ***
  • James: That's why he was so eager to get to work. His wife is on trial.
  • Lily: It’s not a trial. It's a sentencing.
  • ***
  • Lily: Holy shit. It's her!
  • Cedric: Why can't they just take the locket and run?
  • James: Because they don't know if she still has it. And stealth is still needed.
  • Albus: Also because that man is the Minister himself.
  • ***
  • Alastor: I think I preferred it when Crouch Jnr had it.
  • ***
  • Cedric: Mr Weasley is terrifying.
  • James: I think Harry agrees.
  • ***
  • Lily: Well so much for stealth!
  • James: Don't look at me like that! He's your son too!
  • Sirius: They might actually make it out.
  • Lily: Crap! Yaxley has them! He's seen Grimmauld Place!
  • Cedric: So where are we now?
  • ***
  • Lily: Ron must be really afraid if he's stopped saying “Voldemort”.
  • Albus: Perhaps not the most foolish of precautions.
  • ***
  • Alastor: You know why he's after Gregorovitch, don't you Albus.
  • Albus: I do. I'm curious to see if it will work.
  • ***
  • Alastor: Not a Christian but I appreciate the effort Potter.
  • ***
  • James: Ron isn't holding up too well.
  • Alastor: Some people aren't cut out for field work.
  • ***
  • Lily: The sword...?
  • Albus: Indeed.
  • James: So where is it?
  • Albus: Therein lies the question.
  • ***
  • Lily: He left...
  • James: I can't believe it. He's gone...
  • ***
  • Cedric: That's it then. He can't find them. He's really gone.
  • Albus: Perhaps.
  • ***
  • James: He doesn't care about the sword. He wants to go home.
  • Lily: Back to where it all started.
  • ***
  • James: Welcome home Lily.
  • Lily: I never thought th- they built us a statue?
  • James: Damn right they did.
  • Sirius: Where’s my statue? Bastards.
  • James: Why would they build you one idiot? You helped kill us. Remember?
  • ***
  • Cedric: I thought Dumbledore would be here to see his family’s graves. But I'm guessing he's actually with them now so never mind.
  • ***
  • Lily: He's crying...
  • James: So are we...
  • ***
  • James: Do you think they would've gone to all this trouble if Voldemort hadn’t been defeated?
  • Lily: Of course not. We'd have been just three more victims.
  • ***
  • James: Something isn't right. Bathilda was the sharpest woman I've ever met.
  • Lily: And now she looks...dead.
  • Albus: That would be because she is indeed deceased.
  • Sirius: How could you know that?
  • Albus: I just came from visiting her.
  • Cedric: Then who is that?
  • Alastor: What, not who. And that is Bait.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Holy fucking shit!
  • James: Run Harry!
  • Lily: Hermione! That was close. What's wrong with him?
  • Albus: I believe he is trapped inside the memories of Voldemort. The memories associated with the last time he stood there.
  • Lily: Oh...
  • ***
  • James: Grindelwald?!?
  • ***
  • Lily: Do you have anything to say?
  • Albus: Keep watching.
  • ***
  • James: Is that a...
  • Lily: Snape. That's his patronus.
  • Cedric: How do you know?
  • Lily: Because that's mine.
  • ***
  • Lily: Take the Horcrux off. Take the Horcrux off. Take the Horcrux off.
  • James: Dammit Harry.
  • Cedric: This can't end well.
  • ***
  • Cedric: I take that back!
  • Sirius: About damn time Ron!
  • ***
  • Lily: Family.
  • ***
  • James: This is genuinely hilarious.
  • Cedric: Hermione is a badass.
  • Lily: So cute. They're all back together.
  • ***
  • Albus: Ah boys. I wish I was there to help. But alas I am not.
  • ***
  • Alastor: More breadcrumbs Albus? If you trust Severus so much why didn't you just give him a letter to send to them?
  • Albus: Old friend, in this matter, the journey is far more important than the goal itself.
  • ***
  • James: The Deathly Hallows?
  • Lily: What are they?
  • Sirius: A children's story.
  • Albus: I think you'll find, Mr Black, that most children's stories are based on truth.
  • ***
  • Alastor: They should never have come here!
  • Cedric: They took his daughter! He had no choice.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Albus...are the Hallows real?
  • Albus: They are.
  • Sirius: How do you know? How can you be sure?
  • Albus: Because I've held them all.
  • ***
  • Lily: I really hope you haven't just split them apart again.
  • Albus: They are behaving as I expected them to.
  • ***
  • Lily: Oh it’s good to hear them again.
  • Sirius: Keep the faith.
  • James: NO! Ah Harry don't use the name.
  • ***
  • Alastor: Stay calm. Stick to your story.
  • Cedric: Too late. They've been found out.
  • James: They're taking him to Voldemort.
  • Lily: I think Harry is with him already.
  • ***
  • Albus: Poor Draco. I tried to help him.
  • Sirius: No you did the bare minimum. If you really tried to help him then we wouldn't be watching this.
  • Albus: I do believe you're right. But necessity demanded.
  • ***
  • Lily: Oh God. They're going to torture her.
  • ***
  • James: The mirror?
  • Sirius: What use is that going to be?
  • ***
  • Sirius: Pettigrew! You treacherous bastard!
  • James: Wait! What? No!
  • Lily: ...he's dead. What just happened.
  • Albus: Love. Mercy. Forgiveness. Things such as these can forge terribly great magic. Harry spared Pettigrews life and created a debt. Peter's hand, a construct of pure magic, just repaid it.
  • ***
  • Sirius: He's not here.
  • James: I don't think he wanted to meet the two people he betrayed and the one he blackmailed.
  • Sirius: He's gotten smarter. But I think I'll hunt him down.
  • ***
  • Albus: Oh my...
  • Lily: He's coming! You have to go!
  • James: Woah that was close! DOBBY! Excellent timing!
  • Cedric: Shell Cottage. Nice na- oh no. Don't...
  • Dobby: Master Dumbledore sir. What has happened?
  • James: Dobby. We are Harry Potters parents. We've been watching you help our son for five years. You've been so noble. So brave.
  • Lily: We want you to know, we love you so much Dobby. And you will always be with friends here.
  • Dobby: Kind Miss has Harry Potters eyes.
  • ***
  • Dobby: Such kind words from Sirs and Misses. And Harry Potter is sad.
  • Lily: Of course he is sad. He loved you more than we do. He is your friend.
  • ***
  • James: I don't understand what's going on.
  • Lily: Me neither.
  • Alastor: Then why don't you both shut up and listen to your son explain it all?
  • ***
  • Albus: Harry. You amazing young man. I'm proud of you my boy.
  • James: You had the Elder Wand? You took it from Grindelwald?
  • Albus: I did.
  • Lily: And why not give it to Harry?
  • Albus: You must pay closer attention Mrs Potter.
  • ***
  • Cedric: So we're planning again. But this time to break into Gringotts.
  • James: Should be fun. Did Godric really steal the sword?
  • Albus: It’s quite possible. No human account would ever admit to it. And who's to say the goblin history isn't biased either.
  • Lily: You were a teacher right?
  • ***
  • James: You're back. Moony has a son.
  • Sirius: Well I’ll be dammed. Good for you mate.
  • Lily: He looks so happy.
  • ***
  • Alastor: Weasley. As subtle as ever.
  • Cedric: Hermione is the only one who appreciates subtlety. The other two prefer a wand to the face.
  • ***
  • Albus: Once more unto the breach
  • ***
  • James: I recognise his voice.
  • Lily: Travers is the one who almost killed me. And then you dropped your wand and beat him half to death.
  • Sirius: Potter, your laziness is biting your son in the arse. “Half to death” finish the job!
  • ***
  • Lily: He just used the Imperius Curse...
  • James: It was necessary.
  • Alastor: Be grateful he's managed to avoid killing anyone. What was your bodycount?
  • Lily: More than zero.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Dammit! This is the ministry all over again.
  • James: Onwards. Get the Horcrux.
  • ***
  • Lily: They’ve got i- GODDAMMIT GRIPHOOK!
  • Alastor: They should have never trusted the goblin!
  • James: They had no choice! Time to go son!
  • ***
  • Cedric: They did it. They got the cup.
  • Sirius: Lost the sword.
  • Albus: They did well. But now Tom Riddle will know what they are hunting.
  • James: He already knows. Now what?
  • Lily: To Hogwarts.
  • Dobby: Once again Harry Potter frees a poor and hurt creature. He is truly great.
  • Albus: You are correct Dobby. He really is.
  • ***
  • James: They're in trouble!
  • Sirius: They need to-
  • Albus: Brother.
  • ***
  • Lily: Your brother isn't being helpful.
  • Albus: He's worrying more about their safety than their success. He's a better man than I ever was.
  • ***
  • James: Oh...
  • Lily: Albus...oh Albus I'm so sorry.
  • Albus: I should introduce you to my family. They would like you. But that may have to wait. I believe we are about to go home.
  • ***
  • Alastor: The war came to Hogwarts.
  • Albus: And here it will end. Never tickle a sleeping dragon.
  • ***
  • James: Use them Harry. You need the help
  • ***
  • Sirius: Why would you step out from the cloak?
  • James: He can handle Alecto.
  • Lily: So can Luna.
  • ***
  • Lily: Oh good. He's used Cruciatus.
  • James: Let's just hope he doesn't need to use the last one.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Oh great. This dick.
  • James: Oh man! Look at Minnie go! Kick his ass!
  • Lily: They're on the same side!
  • Sirius: So?
  • ***
  • Sirius: I wish I was there. One last battle.
  • James: Me too Padfoot.
  • Sirius: Although...maybe not at this very moment.
  • Lily: This is so awkward. Jeez Fleur, really?
  • ***
  • Lily: Aww they made up.
  • Alastor: Just in time to die.
  • James: Death did not make you any cheerier did it?
  • ***
  • Cedric: See I’m impressed by the visual. But the fact that it’s always Slytherin versus the other three, seems to highlight a major problem in this school.
  • Albus: I agree Mr Diggory. A simple idea that has such permanent consequences.
  • ***
  • James: In the middle of a battle and he forgets what he's doing.
  • Lily: Has your attention span.
  • James: Why is it that every bad thing comes from me?
  • ***
  • Albus: The Grey Lady. Harry you marvelous young man.
  • Dobby: Ghost Miss Ravenclaw has always been kind to me.
  • Albus: Ah of course! Before he met with me. In case I escorted him out.
  • James: But where did he hide it?
  • Albus: I do not know. But I believe Harry does.
  • ***
  • Lily: Even now he is loyal to you.
  • ***
  • Cedric: Chamber of Secrets? Hell of a romantic date Ron.
  • Albus: Aaahh of course. These children are magnificent.
  • ***
  • Lily: It’s about damn time!
  • James: They're really going at it.
  • Alastor: Timing. Idiots.
  • ***
  • James: Sirius is following Tonks. Cedric and Alastor have gone to see other people.
  • Lily: I guess it's just us then.
  • Albus: Fitting in a way.
  • Dobby: Yes sir.
  • Hedwig: Hoot.
  • ***
  • Lily: These three again?
  • James: When are old school enemies not welcome?
  • ***
  • James: He just tried to kill Hermione...
  • Lily: Were we like this?
  • James: Probably.
  • ***
  • James: Fucking fiendfyre! You crazy bastard!
  • ***
  • Lily: We would never have tried to save them.
  • James: Speak for yourself. I saved Snape remember.
  • Lily: Oh shut up. They destroyed another Horcrux
  • ***
  • James: Oh no...
  • Lily: Hello Fred.
  • Fred: Blimey. You're the Potters! Professor Dumbledore! Oh hell!
  • James: Yes Fred you are dead. But if it makes you feel better, you can call me Prongs.
  • Fred: But my pare- YOU'RE JOKING!
  • Sirius: No he's not. I'm Padfoot. And this is Moony, who literally can’t duel to save his life.
  • Remus: I’d say it's good to see you Fred bu...James? Lily?
  • James: It’s good to see you old friend.
  • ***
  • Remus: It’s been years.
  • Lily: For you. Where’s Tonks?
  • Remus: Dolohov killed her after he did me. When Padfoot collected us she went to see Teddy.
  • ***
  • James: Let's go end this.
  • ***
  • Fred: This is chaos.
  • Alastor: This is war!
  • Fred: Mad Eye! You’re al- oh yeah I'm dead.
  • Sirius: You get used to it.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Dammit Hagrid!
  • Remus: Wonderful. Giants.
  • ***
  • James: Focus Harry. You can do this.
  • Lily: Luna! Bless your soul.
  • ***
  • Remus: I'm not sure how I feel about Voldemort using this place.
  • ***
  • Lily: Oh God. Snape, run!
  • James: Too late.
  • Remus: What is he doing?
  • Albus: That's a memory.
  • Severus: Albus? Where are w- Lily??
  • Sirius: You sonofa-
  • James: Motherf-
  • Lily: QUIET! No one says a word until we see that memory.
  • Albus: If I may-
  • Lily: Not a word! You have both played with my sons life as if he were a piece in a game! No one has the right to talk until we see that memory!
  • ***
  • Lily: You bullied my son. And his friends. You went out of your way to torture and torment them. But you also risked your life for my son, every day for the last three years.I do not forgive you, but you can stay. For now.
  • Sirius: Wait what?
  • James: You heard her. But I swear, you pine after my wife even once and I'll punch you in the face.
  • Severus: I won't be here long. I want to see how it ends. After that, I will leave.
  • ***
  • Severus: It’s good to see you Lily.
  • Fred: He says after we just watched a montage based on sixteen years of his love for her.
  • Remus: Fred, shut up.
  • ***
  • Cedric: I thought you'd be more disturbed about Harry having to die.
  • Lily: I...
  • James: Don't think for a second that we aren’t being destroyed inside. But there is no choice. Our son has t-...
  • Lily: To defeat Voldemort, our son has to die. And we'll be here to greet him.
  • ***
  • James: He told Neville. About the snake.
  • Lily: Oh. It's Ginny.
  • ***
  • Sirius: The Snitch?
  • Albus: Excellent Harry. I imagine you four should get ready.
  • James: Ready for what?
  • ***
  • Cedric: The Stone! Harry was right!
  • Fred: What the hell is that thing?
  • Albus: Old and powerful magic.
  • ***
  • Lily: He dropped it!
  • James: Harry NO!
  • Lily: Wh-what just happened? Why did Voldemort fall?
  • Severus: What did you do this time you mad old man?
  • Albus: My greatest work! My masterpiece! Engineered from beyond the grave!
  • Lily: Stop patting yourself on the back Dumbledore and tell me what happened to my son!!
  • Albus: Lily! James! Harry is alive! Now, let’s see if this works.
  • James: What? What are you muttering? What-WHERE DID HE GO?
  • ***(Due to Tumblr limits, the rest is under part 2)

George Weasley x Reader

Fandom: Harry Potter, Golden Trio Era
Summary: The twins catch you using their dungbomb to prank Snape and now you have to make it up to them, or more specifically just one of them.
Characters (+Mentioned): Reader, George Weasley, Fred Weasley, Professor Snape and Argus Filtch.
Warnings: None
A/N: Not really proud of this but whatever. sorry for any errors I didn’t get a chance to reread this and I want to point out that I hardly know how dungbombs work.

Originally posted by your-harry-potter-imagines

Sitting outside was always calming for you, you enjoyed the view of the large blue sky and the smell of the grass. You loved the way the cold wind would blow through your hair. You loved curling up beside a tree near the Black Lake with a book in your hands, it was so calming and quiet, but you weren’t able to go outside anymore since the layers of snow were taller than you.

Whenever the cold came you decided to just sit inside the library but today you weren’t really in the mood to read which was strange since you’ve never really fallen out of your ‘schedule.’

Keep reading

superiorfangirllol  asked:

Headcanon: Snape is hella muscular ;)

Albus Dumbledore stands at the top of the tower, his long beard flowing in the wind as Draco points his wand with a shaky hand.  

“Oh? You wish to kill me? Here, I’ll make it easy for you, dear boy.” He rips open his robes, exposing a disturbingly ripped physique underneath.  

Draco boggles at Dumbledore’s six-pack abs and shiny, pale pecs.

“Look at what I can do,” Dumbledore says with a twinkle in his eye, wigging each pec separately as he begins to sing the Hogwarts theme song, “Hoggy-hoggy Hogwarts, teach us something please!”

“I…I can’t….” Draco stutters as the other Death Eaters grow restless.

“Hmph, the Dark Lord has better,” Bellatrix snarls from the corner. “I should know, I’m his spotter. Only his closest and most precious followers get to hold his weights for him.”

Suddenly, there is Severus Snape, appearing as if from nowhere and stepping between Draco and Dumbledore.

“You,” he says, glancing back at Draco, who shrinks away from him. “If you will not do what needs to be done, then I shall.”

“I can’t hope to compare to….that…” Draco says, pointing a shaking finger at Dumbledore’s absurd physique.

“Hmph,” Severus says, “We’ll see about that. Albus Dumbledore! I challenge you to….a MUSCLE OFF!”

Bellatrix snorts and jeers at Severus. “Oh yeah? And where are you going to get those muscles, huh? Make us all hallucinate with your stupid mind tricks?”

“Well, as you may know, black is incredibly slimming,” Severus starts, unbuttoning his jacket and throwing it theatrically to the floor before ripping open the white dress shirt underneath.

Draco lets out a high pitched scream and Death Eaters scatter as buttons go flying.  Underneath his clothing, Severus Snape appears to have the physique of a Greek God.  His muscles are so huge and defined that even Fenrir Grayback in his half-transformed state seems tiny in comparison.

“Gaze upon me and weep,” Severus says, flexing his arms until the sleeves of his dress shirt are tatters that scatter to the floor. Albus tries to flex and show his own display of muscletude, but in the wake of Severus’ awesome musculature, it is obvious who has won.

“Please…Severus…” Albus says, his eyes twinkling with awe as he stares, transfixed, at Severus, who is still flexing his arms on one knee like Hercules himself.

Severus nods, and slowly stands, and takes a step towards the Headmaster.

“LOOK UPON MY MUSCLES AND DESPAIR!” He roars, moving his arms and legs so quickly that a shockwave knocks everyone back away from him.  In a moment, Dumbledore has been pushed backwards off of the tower, his eyes closed in the bliss of an instant death from having seen such perfect muscles on display.

Severus turns, cracking his neck before pulling out his wand and repairing his clothing in one swish and flick, his body appearing thin and scrawny once more under the dark, oppressive cloth.

“We go, now,” he says flatly, daring anyone to disagree.

The Death Eaters, including Bellatrix, take a collective gulp and follow him without question as he drags Draco by the ear.

Preference #1

im trying something new so let me know if you like it!

-How you meet-

Harry: I was just finishing in the Library when a girl walked by me completely oblivious to the group of slytherins making fun of her. She was walking and reading a book and she went to go sit down. I couldn’t stand the people making fun someone so beautiful so I got up and sat down next to her. I pulled out my wand and aimed it at the group of boys, they slowly backed away. That’s when I introduced myself to her.

Ron: I was walking in the hall talking to Harry when the most gorgeous girl walked by. She was walking alone and seemed to not care at all. I couldn’t shift my gaze from her until I walked into a pole right in front of me. I felt a pair of hands that weren’t Harry’s try to help me up. “Are you alright?” Said the giggly voice of the girl I was just admiring.

Fred: I was sitting in the Great Hall alone waiting for George to join me. I took out one of my books and I was about to open it when I noticed something. I knew it was jinxed. Who ever did this, did a sloppy job. I looked to my right and saw a beautiful girl trying to make it not obvious that it was her. I stood up and moved to where she was sitting. “Nice try love, but you’re going to have to do better than that." 

George: I was in Potions class when i was writing down new ideas for me and Fred’s joke shop. I was caught off guard when Snape called on me. "Mr. Weasley, if you get this question wrong yet again I will take 50 points from Griffindor.” I gulped. Thats when I heard a whisper in my ear as Snape looked down for just a split second to take a seat back in his chair. I said the answer and I was right. When Snape continued the lesson I turned to a cute girl I had never noticed before and whispered a “Thanks”

Draco: I was in the process of making fun of a 4th year, when a girl stormed up to me and yelled in my face that I was being rude and a total arse. I was about to say a sly comment back when I looked at her and was star struck by her beauty. I didnt know what to say. “I-uhm- sorry- I-wont happen again,uhm.” She began to blush as she realized I was acting like a compete fool in front of everyone.

Neville: I was in Transfiguration when we had to pair up to do a project. No one ever wanted to pair up with me. I looked around as everyone formed groups. I felt like an idiot. Just then a pretty girl with piercing grey eyes came up to me. “Want to work with me?” I couldn’t form any words at all and simply nodded. She giggled at my dumbfound face.

BOOHOO mean Snape tested a potion made by Neville on Trevor keeping the antidote on hand and the familiar was unharmed, my God what and AWFUL and CRUEL man!!!”: 13385491763591736254 notes

Snape saved Lupin’s life during the Battle of Little Whinging”: 4 notes, one of them complaining about George’s ear

Snape saved Katie Bell”: 1 note

Snape saved many people while spying”: 10 notes, one saying “But he was still a dick!”

Ladies and Gentlemen, let me introduce you to…

Time for a run-down of some of the things I've read about Snape

Only the most “interesting” things that I can think of . There is a lot of fanon and silly statements around which have become routine but these..? 

ETA: got to add the number one dumbest shit which will stay the dumbest in in perpetuity.  An eclipse-worth of shade on anyone who ever said this: 

  • “Snape rhymes with rape!” (and this is supposed to mean something…?)
  • Snape is a duck
  • I hate Snape because he kicked James’s dead body (he only sees James’s body in the movie and doesn’t kick him at all - he’s plainly dead so what’s to be done?!)
  • Snape killed Charity Burbage (“well the book doesn’t say who cast the killing curse!”)
  • Snape killed Dobby and Fred (probably trolling but who can tell?!) 
  • Snape was trying to kill George when he hexed his ear
  • Snape probably dyed his hair black so he would look like James, to try to attract Lily. (Nevermind that he is described at age 9, years before having ever met James, as having black hair…)“
  • Snape was a stalker (because, age 15 he was waiting outside the Gryffindor staircase and refusing to go away so that he could apologise to Lily, and when 9 yrs old watched Lily doing magic before trying to speak to her)
  • Snape called Lily Mudblood because she was dating James (I know that one gets repeated all the time but fun fact: nope.)
  • Snape hugging Lily’s dead body is: creepy, shows he thinks he is entitled to her body, necrophiliac continue ad infinitem (nevermind this is only in the movie and actually could represent someone’s reaction to finding a dead loved one, but hey) 
  • Update: Snape was homophobic! (obvs., because lycanthropy = HIV, so…..)
  • Snape stalked Draco (thank you pro-severus-snape)

I’m sure we could add to this.

  • i just saw someone blaming snape for not telling dumbledore that petunia was going to be abusive to harry

as if he knew (say-yestosparklingvaginas)