snake lyfe

Never fear! Warm Snek Christmas edition is here!

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Merry Christmas to all and to all a cute snek <3

Butch DeLoriaxFemale Lone Wanderer Headcanons

So I have this HUGE idea for a Butch DeLoria x Female Lone Wanderer fanfiction. And I have all these damn headcanons. Shall I write a giant story about all these? (Please don’t steal the ideas! I really want to write this someday but I can’t hold these ideas in anymore.)

  • The Female Lone Wanderer’s headcanonical name is Eve, Eva or Evelyn. James and the FLW’s mother were both religious and quoted the bible. Also, The GECK James searched for stands for Garden of Eden Creation Kit. He would want his daughter to belong to something beautiful. Not to mention…President Eden is this big lie in the same way that utopia can never exist, and the FLW comes to accept that. While she searches long and hard for a better life, she is only shown that she can no longer obtain what she wants. Not to mention, Butch is a Tunnel SNAKE, like the snake who tempted Eve. He believes in anarchy and making one’s own choices that defy the higher power (the Overseer who plays God).
  •  Butch’s father was killed by the overseer. Ellen DeLoria is always drunk like she’s washing away sorrows. Butch’s father used to tell him stories about the outside world and tell him to never tell anyone because everyone is supposed to believe that you are born in the vault and die in the vault. Eventually, when Butch was three or four, his father tried to leave the Vault and was shot by the Overseer’s henchman, perhaps Officer Kendall. Butch could barely remember this…but eventually figured it out as the years went on. His hatred for the Overseer’s control was a personal matter as well as his rebellious spirit coming to light.
  • Butch and the FLW were best friends before the age of nine. They used to share Grognak the Barbarian comic books, and play in the atrium. Eventually however, Butch received pressure from the other boys (mainly Wally Mack) to break away because of gender roles. The female lone wanderer then got even closer to Amata.
  • Butch DeLoria is afraid of radroaches because, when he was five he was locked in the lowest level of Vault 101. His alcoholic mother Ellen DeLoria locked him there.  Butch kept asking his mom about what happened to his dad, and afraid of the Overseer’s wrath, she told Butch to stop asking. But being a  typical five year old, he kept asking over and over. So, she dragged him to the sub basement area while intoxicated. After locking the door, he began to cry and scream after a radroach came out and attacked him. James shows up with his daughter to unlock the door and comfort him. After that, Butch holds a respect for James, but has a resentment towards his daughter that he doesn’t have a father like him. When Butch bullies the lone wanderer, James never actually gets angry since he still feels bad about Butch’s lack of a father figure.
  • The FLW always cried to her dad about Butch. James told her that boys only tease you when they like you… For years, she hoped that was the case. But she still didn’t believe that hitting on her actually meant hitting her!
  • The Female Lone Wanderer is nicknamed “Nosebleed” because of what Butch did. At the age of nine, the kids were playing baseball in the atrium. Eventually, the female became MVP (because the perk says so) and jealous of this, the opposing team’s players told Butch to bring her down a notch. When she was up to bat, he was pitcher, and threw the baseball right at her face, where it hit her nose and she received a bloody nose. He’d been calling her “Nosebleed” ever since.
  • The Female Lone wanderer never fights back against Butch unless he’s bullying someone else, namely Amata. He then stops targeting  Amata after realizing this and tries even harder to get a rise out of her, like throwing gum in her hair during class or tripping her after class. When it never works, he gets obsessed with this…and maybe even develops something far different from hatred.
  • When they were seventeen, Butch fucked up the FLW’s hair. To get back at him for all his teasing she called him a hairdresser instead of a barber. He decided to pull  a prank and botched her long hair unevenly. When she told Amata, Amata tied it like her own hair. So they wore similar hairstyles for a long time. Over time, the ponytail began to grow out more until it no longer resembled the other girl. But she refused to go back to the Vault hairdresser…err barber.
  • A year before the FLW left Vault 101, her relationship with Butch got…somewhat…better. While he still teased her, shoved her in the halls when the other guys were around, etc, he began to get quiet when it was just the two of them. He’d watch her shooting her BB gun in the basement, and even gave her a shot of whiskey he managed to steal from the Overseer’s chambers. They finally got to talk about what it was like growing up with one of their parents being dead. It turns out they had more in common than they initially thought.
  • Butch began to date Susie Mack, Wally Mack’s sister. She’d never admit to it, but when the FLW catches them making out in the hall, she immediately turns back around where she came from and feels like she could cry without fully comprehending why. Butch tries to talk to the FLW and be nicer, but she instead treats him harshly because of her jealousy. He again turns hostile. Wally Mack soon quits the Tunnel Snakes after that, pissed that Butch would go with his sister. 
  • After she left the vault, the FLW always wore the Tunnel Snakes jacket Butch gave her. She began to panic as it got more and more damaged. Eventually, Moira fixed it up, and teases that it has the scent of a man’s aftershave and cologne.
  • Butch DeLoria was the one who spray painted “Fuck You, Overseer” on the “Thank You, Overseer” sign. Amata kept yelling at him to stop it. But he managed to make a contraption out of rope to allow him to paint the sign with the other Tunnel Snakes
  • Butch meets James Hargrave in Rivet City. The kid with a bad attitude has a dead father and alcoholic mother and he reminds Butch so much of himself as a child that it begins to disturb him. He tells the kid about his own life and even becomes like a big brother James could look up to. He also told James to be always be good to C.J. Young, the little girl who always follows james around. And if he does, he’ll even let him join the Tunnel Snakes when he grows up. James asks why he has to act so nice to her. Butch tells James that he’ll understand why when he’s older…. Because he wishes he could’ve treated the FLW better. Every day, he’d been waiting for her to show up in Rivet City…
  • When the FLW agrees to travel with Butch again, she knees him in the groin. Butch apologizes for all the times he bullied her and beat her up when they were kids. So, she knees him in the balls and says she forgives him. He of course crumples to the floor and says “Yeah…maybe…I deserved that Nosebleed.”
  • Butch DeLoria is still a HUGE Grognak the Barbarian comic book fan at the age of 20. His line “I hear there were dragons out there. You ever seen one?” reveals this. It drives the FLW crazy, especially since he spends all their caps on rare issues rather than on the supplies they need.
  • When the pair sleep in Raider camps outdoors, the female lone wanderer always takes the top bunk when they manage to find bunkbeds. Based on the line “Man that creeps me out. That thing up there…you know? The sky…” The lone wanderer knows he’s terrified to look up there, so she alleviates his fear by taking the top bunk, making it feel like he’s back in the Vault.
  • Butch suffers from monophobia: the fear of being alone. His whole “Tunnel Snakes 4 LYFE” motto is only him trying to belong to something. The Tunnel Snakes have no real goals or purpose besides to be “the most badassest gang in the wastes”. Plus, he’s the only one to leave the vault for good after Trouble on the Homefront. This likely means, he knows the gang is over with and everyone else abandoned him… Even still, he follows the FLW and uses the “gang” as an excuse. He never wants anyone else following you. So how could a gang ever form?
  • Butch sings along to Galaxy News Radio. Whenever they are at a bar, Butch gets buzzed and just starts singing along. The FLW told him a million times to shut the hell up, but he just sings louder. His favorite song is supposedly “I’m a Mighty Mighty Man.” because it says that “I really don’t need a wife.” This upsets the FLW though she never says so.
  • The Female Lone Wanderer loves when Butch cuts her hair. The feeling of his fingers against her scalp takes her breath away…until he decides to play the same prank like when they were kids and shaves part of her scalp. She sics Dogmeat on him.
  • Butch really likes Dogmeat, though initially acts like he doesn’t. This is since he doesn’t mind having Dogmeat follow as well. He wanted to sew Dogmeat a personal Tunnel Snake jacket… The FLW forbid it.
  • Butch manages to find a way to bake a sweetroll. He goes through life and limb to obtain the ingredients. He gives it to the female lone wanderer as a peace offering after taking her sweet roll at her birthday party ten years prior.
  • The Lone Wanderer says goodbye to Dogmeat and Butch during the last quest (without expansion). She makes a slight joke that Dogmeat and Butch should go into the irradiated chamber of Project Purity. And while Butch declines, he doesn’t believe that she planned to do it anyway. He doesn’t understand why she says goodbye and tells him to take care of Dogmeat. When she goes in, he tries to stop her but it’s too late.
  • Butch goes into a huge depression before the events of Broken Steel (aka end of game without expansion). He becomes an alcoholic just like his mother and only has thoughts of the lone wanderer. Dogmeat ends up taking care of him more than he takes care of Dogmeat. Every day, Butch regrets that he didn’t activate the control chamber in her stead. Whenever he hears Three Dog mention her on GNR, he gives a toast before downing his last shot and smashing the glass. Instead of “I’m a Mighty Man” he only listens to the slow sad songs like “I Don’t Want to Set the World on Fire.
  • Ok, that last one made me tear up. AHEM. The female lone wanderer and Butch are in love. I mean…that damn dialogue. As a follower, he flirts so much only if you’re female. Need I say more?
  • Butch and Dogmeat are reunited with the Female Lone Wanderer… The Three Tunnel Snakes For Life. 
The signs as Johnny Jhonny quotes
  • Aries: "I punched a snake once."
  • Taurus: "Thug lyfe!"
  • Gemini: "I just seen some freaky sights yo!"
  • Cancer: "Thanks for keeping me people, bro."
  • Leo: "I'll pass a fist through your face."
  • Virgo: "I forget where I was going with this but the takeaway is your parents don't love each other."
  • Libra: "Well, well, well, well well well well well wellwellwellwellwellwellwell."
  • Scorpio: "All roads lead to Rome... But we ain't going to Rome."
  • Sagittarius: "On a scale of yes to no: yes."
  • Capricorn: "I just like to say drug because it disappoints society!"
  • Aquarius: "What the punch was that?"
  • Pisces: "Oh, this ain't blood. My Impakt Krimson Deluxe Hair Dye liquefies upon collision for easy post-tussle reapplication."