smoke it if you got it

  • Draco:Wait. Pansy got detention!? How did you manage that? [laughing] Did you break a nail and curse in front of a professor?
  • Pansy:If you must know I just had a rather large duel with a seventh year Ravenclaw who spilled their morning tea on my shoes....
  • Blaise:and when McGonagall asked her what motivated her to hex the girl...
  • Pansy:Apparently Spite and the cost of my cleaning bill were the wrong answers.
  • Blaise:Was still amazing to see though! You should have seen McGonagall's face! she looked like smoke was going to start coming out of her ears she was so mad!
  • Theo:Well Pans did use Diffindo on the Ravenclaw table... that was one hell of a mess....
  • Pansy:[smirking] Maybe they should teach people to be less clumsy...

fayelayna  asked:

What are ways we can prepare for the premiere ?

Here are some suggestions:

* Drink copious amounts of alcohol

* Smoke a fat blunt

* If you wear makeup, make sure it’s water-proof

* Stock up on your favorite comfort food. Like a lot of it…

* Go to Costco and buy the big ass industrial sized box of tissues.

* Soundproof your house so when you are screaming and crying your neighbors won’t think you got murdered.

* Schedule an appointment with a therapist in advance

* Get a puppy or a kitten you can pet during the episode

Hope this helps! :)

youtube

I will say this.  Comfortably Numb was a very interesting choice of song for Ben to do.  Attaching the lyrics for… reasons:

Hello,
Is there anybody in there?
Just nod if you can hear me.
Is there anyone at home?

Come on now
I hear you’re feeling down
Well, I can ease your pain
And get you on your feet again

Relax
I’ll need some information first
Just the basic facts
Can you show me where it hurts?

There is no pain, you are receding
A distant ship smoke on the horizon
You are only coming through in waves
Your lips move but I can’t hear what you’re saying
When I was a child I had a fever
My hands felt just like two balloons
Now I’ve got that feeling once again
I can’t explain, you would not understand
This is not how I am
I have become comfortably numb

I have become comfortably numb

O.K.
Just a little pin prick
There’ll be no more aaaaaaaah!
But you may feel a little sick

Can you stand up?

*

Good night everyone!  :o)

anonymous asked:

Why do you think that Napoleon was a babysitter for his marshals? It will be nice to know some facts about that.

Davout hated Bernadotte because during the Battle of Jean-Auerstedt Bernadotte failed to come to the outnumbered Davout’s aid. Bernadotte apparently was so close to the battle that he could see smoke and hear cannon fire.

Murat and Lannes detested each other and there was at least one occasion were Napoleon had to step in and stop both of them from hurting each other.

Lannes and Bessieres almost got into a duel, but the fight was broken up by Massena. *insert incompetent toady insult here*

Speaking of, Massena and Bessieres didn’t have the best of relationships either  (i.e. Massena’s “I would have preferred more men and less Bessières” comment)

Davout didn’t care much for Murat (mostly due to issues during the Russian Campaign) and Berthier. 

Marmont pretty much didn’t like anybody. 

Lannes and Bessieres both racked up pretty hefty debts

Massena and Soult kept plundering the countries they were fighting even though Napoleon told them to stop.

This is just the drama I can think of off the top of my head, anon. Basically, while some of the marshals were friendly to each other many of them down right hated each other. Also they kept doing stupid shit. So Napo the babysitter had to watch over them like the man children they were. 

late summer nights go down pink and gold
cold river days and bonfire smoke nights
elk on the mountains and friends crashing on your couch
jeeps rattle over back roads and the radio plays and you got your shoes on the dashboard and we’re all gonna live forever, golden and moonlit and honest ✨🌙🌾

Made with Instagram

To people who cry very easily and often like me:

Tears are a way for the body to let go of the weight of the things you are feeling. Bad or good feelings, you cry when it becomes too much: too much sadness, too much happiness, too much amazement, too much fear, too much anger etc. So, don’t feel stupid for crying whenever you get a little passionate about something, get into an argument, etc ; your tears are proof that you feel very deeply about whatever you are doing or is happening to you when you cry. (fyi it doesn’t mean people who never cry don’t feel deeply, just that they feel differently). Really, you should be amazed to be one of the few to be able to feel and care so fiercely about the world around you and what it offers you that your body needs to release tears so often. All in all, crying a lot is nothing to be ashamed of. Other people’s opinions are irrelevant here, sure it sucks when you cry in class or at work, but in the long run and in the “grand scheme of things”, it’s not a weakness I promise you. It’s a strength.

THEY DID THE NASTY - Headcanons [RFA]

Thank you thank you thank you! I’ve lobbed both of you in here together since both themes fit nicely together ^v^


Zen

Post-Sex

  • Probably is the kind of dude to smoke in bed after sex but you can bet he’s got the ash tray right underneath his chin just in case anything gets dropped because burning your s/o is one way to kill the mood
  • SO MUCH AFTERCARE 
  • If he thinks he’s been rough trust me he’s going to get you water and he’ll lay there stroking your hair telling you how you’re far too good for him even if you’re both sweaty and gross
  • Gently encourages you to lay on top of the sheets rather than crawling under because he still thinks your body is so beautiful and he’ll admire you as he falls asleep

Morning After

  • If you mentioned something about taking a bath in the morning then you can bet he’s been up for at least an hour before you drawing the nicest bath possible
  • Floating tea-lights, essential oils, the whole shebang
  • And if you’ll let him then he’ll get in the bath with you and give you a lil shoulder rub and everything because yeah buddy he thought last night was great and he wants you to feel just as nice the day after


Jaehee

Post-Sex

  • Poor Baehee would probably be exhausted afterwards like she’s not an overtly sexual person and she would have done her best 
  • PRAISE HER
  • PRAISE
  • HER
  • She’d cuddle in close and lay her head against you and if you mutter soft praise then she’d just end up burying her face against you you know she loves every second of it
  • Falls asleep loosely holding onto you so you’re not too warm while you go to sleep but she’s still close

Morning After

  • Wakes you up as gently as possible
  • Brings you some herbal tea in the morning because it’s nice and relaxing and she’s already got some nice clean comfortable clothes ready for you
  • If neither of you are in a rush then you can take a nice warm shower together and she has this really soothing orange and lavender soap that nobody is usually allowed to use but her
  • But hey you can use it bc she luvs u


Jumin

Post-Sex

  • Tbh I feel like he’d be really great at aftercare but at the same time he wouldn’t really think to lay with you for long
  • Like welp he’s getting up to go shower because he wants to be nice and clean and you’re just like whaT ABOUT CUDDLING
  • He’d probably also come back with a towel around his waist and insist you shower too because hey no need in being all gross n stuff
  • You get back and the cat’s in your space
  • He’s asleep
  • God damn it

Morning After

  • Even though you’d probably wake up with the cat on your chest instead of him cuddling up close (we’ve established this guy is THE WORST at cuddling) it’d still be nice
  • He’d have had the curtains opened while you both slept so that you’d both be woken up in the most natural way possible
  • Obviously he’d have you pull on some comfortable pajamas the night before so that when his staff brought breakfast in in the morning you’d be kept for his eyes only
  • Tells you how good you did because he’s EMBARRASSING


Yoosung

Post-Sex

  • There’s not gonna be much to say here because honestly I feel like Yoosung would be the kind to almost immediately fall asleep when you’ve done the nasty
  • Like this dude is vanilla AF and far from the most experienced so forget any kind of cuddling 
  • Just zonk and he’s out for the count with the sheets pulled up over both of you

  • He’s still clingy in his sleep tho like even though he basically passed out as soon as his head hit the pillow you can bet he’s grabbing onto you during the night all sweaty and gross-like

Morning After

  • He’d only get woken up by you moving around in the morning
  • But he’d basically leap out of bed as soon as he woke up and had a moment to realise that he didn’t just dream about last night
  • HE HAS TO BE A GENTLEMAN
  • or so he thinks anyway
  • So he slaps together breakfast in bed with toast and coffee and god bless he’s doing his best you can’t help but laugh


707

Post-Sex

  • You can bet he’s going insta-cling
  • You gotta convince him to shower though bc he’s sweaty and stuff and almost immediately he insists you come shower with him in case he slips down the drain or smthn
  • So you both get into the shower together and he washes your hair and everything and he has apple-scented shampoo and oh, you realise, that’s why his hair always smells so nice

  • You both sit drying off on the edge of the bed for a while and eventually you both just collapse in bed

Morning After

  • He’s such a massive cheese honestly you wake up in the morning and he’s laying ‘paint-me-one-of-your-french-girls’ style
  • ‘I never asked you how you like your eggs, did I’
  • All you can really do is smack him over the head
  • Eventually both of you get up and tiredly make your way to the kitchen for a join-effort breakfast that you both barely manage to shovel down your throats because waking up is haaard

“Amethyst!? Peri!? Did we just- Holy Smokes!”

/-This is not a Leak-/
Nosey asks!

0: Height
1: Age
2: Shoe size
3: Do you smoke?
4: Do you drink?
5: Do you take drugs?
6: Age you get mistaken for
7: Have tattoos?
8: Want any tattoos?
9: Got any piercings?
10: Want any piercings?
11: Best friend?
12: Relationship status
13: Biggest turn ons
14: Biggest turn offs
15: Favorite movie
16: I’ll love you if…
17: Someone you miss
18: Most traumatic experience
19: A fact about your personality
20: What I hate most about myself
21: What I love most about myself
22: What I want to be when I get older
23: My relationship with my sibling(s)
24: My relationship with my parent(s)
25: My idea of a perfect date
26: My biggest pet peeves
27: A description of the girl/boy I like
28: A description of the person I dislike the most
29: A reason I’ve lied to a friend
30: What I hate the most about work/school
31: What my last text message says
32: What words upset me the most
33: What words make me feel the best about myself
34: What I find attractive in women
35: What I find attractive in men
36: Where I would like to live
37: One of my insecurities
38: My childhood career choice
39: My favorite ice cream flavor
40: Who I wish I could be
41: Where I want to be right now
42: The last thing I ate
43: Sexiest person that comes to my mind immediately
44: A random fact about anything

You guys Louis is so nice…he’s just…such a soft and good person. He doesn’t need to be so kind to random strangers, he could just go down the line and do the bare minimum like other people do (uh, *cough* the person he was walking with), but you could tell he wanted to see as many people as possible and he took his time with everyone. I don’t even know how we got so lucky, the show organizers just happened to pick the part of the line we were in to go stand at the red carpet and then we ended up get ushered to the front of the railing. Like I’m blown away at how perfect it played out this afternoon. We saw Louis a lot by the backdoor of the studio, he went out for a smoke break twice. Danielle, Oli, Daniel, and Lou (and two other people I didn’t recognize) were all out there with him at one point or another. He was really relaxed and seemed happy. The other judges walked the carpet - it was soooo staged, omg, they filmed stuff over again and rehearsed exactly what fans would say before they even got there - and then Louis and Simon did together. They went down most of the line (Louis was opposite my side) and then did a short interview at the end. I really really wish I could have heard what Louis was asked and what he said but no one was wearing a mic so I couldn’t pick up on anything. So I don’t know what the topic was but Louis seemed fine. Then, like, I thought he was going to walk off because he was technically done, but we were still screaming his name and he turned around and walked back to us, and omg, I just blanked. I was going to compliment him on his shirt but he changed and I didn’t know what the new one said at the time. So I asked him for a selfie and then yelled thank you, I think, haha. (I wish I had asked him to write me a tattoo but I was so out of it, I didn’t think it was going to happen, so I didn’t have anything but the shirt comment ready to go in my head.) He was SO SWEET with my youngest sister (she’s 11), I want to cry, it was the best thing I’ve ever seen. He said “Come in for a cuddle now love” and pulled her into such an adorable hug. Then he shook my parents’ hands, haha, they’re in love with him now. I forget what they said to him but I think it was just how much we love him. (My dad went on for like a minute after about how strong and professional his handshake is lmao.) He just really took his time when he didn’t have to. And he gave the people he talked to his undivided attention and smiled and laughed and was all around so wonderful.

Normally I wouldn’t post something like this. I hate asking for help, but I need help.

You see, my house caught fire tonight. I was cooking dinner and turned on the wrong burner and it caught the stuff on top of the stove on fire. The kitchen is destroyed, but the house is livable once the electricity gets turned back on and it gets cleaned out. 

All 7 of my dogs are okay. 5 of them were outside already and I got Pig and Boxy out. Sammy and Lionel (two cats) got out okay, but Tilly, Sutures, and Tucker were in the house. Sutures and Tucker are okay, but Tilly died from smoke inhalation. I am broken hearted because this is all my fault.

Fortunately my Dad and I got out okay. My mom was in the hospital (well still is) when the fire broke so she is okay. 

Unfortunately we do not have house insurance. A friend of the family’s has set up a GoFundMe. If you could donate or share this post, that’d be swell. If you can only donate $1 that’s fine. If you want to send me messages on here, that’s fine too. All I ask is for you to share this. I’m grieving hard and I just want to get the house back into shape.

https://www.gofundme.com/2atvbgk