smeggy

Gavin being such a bag of dicks before the Crew all gets captured that as the rival crew is interrogating them Michael goes

“I know how you can break the golden shithead over there.” With a mean smirk. And Gavin’s squawking away all betrayed and the Rival crew is obvs p suspicious but Michael’s like

“So get like a loaf of white bread…” And the crew grins simultaneously, everyone but Gavin who goes bone-white, “soak it in water, all the way through, like, or I guess you could go with slices but, the loafs got bang for your buck.”

and Gavin’s gagging now “No, no you smeggy pleb, Michael you traitor jersey bitch why boi, boi please-”

“And make him eat it. Smear it all over his face, hell hold it near him. he’ll squeal like a bitch.” Michael finishes


Geoff is nodding, “We don’t need the info anyway you kids just go right on ahead and have fun.”

Ryan’s chiming in “He’s got a very delicate gag reflex, believe me, once he starts retching the truth will come pouring out.”

Needless to say, that Rival Crew got one warehouse stuffed with goodies and the everlasting camaraderie of seven out of eight main members of the Fake AH Crew that day.

And then Gavin hacked their off shore bank account the next day and screwed them over financially big time.

Whenever Smeggy sings “So you think that you’re the wild boys, the wild boys of pop - well let me tell you somethin’, you ain’t fit to suck my cock! in the Live ‘N Rockin recording of 'Road to Rack 'N’ Ruin’ my everything goes weak.

It’s between this line, and my favourite lyrics from 'Big Daddy’ to turn into another King Kurt backpatch.

i have too many KK backpatches as it is :(

maybe i’ll just paint it over my bed in a circular fashion with a loony tunes end titles Smeggy poppin’ out of it in the center

that’ll drive the fellas wild fer sure!