Inter-House Friendships #2
  • Ravenclaw: *laying on the floor having an existential crisis*
  • Hufflepuff: *quietly lays next to them*
  • Slytherin: *shakes head in defeat and sits next to the other two*
  • Gryffindor: *lays entire body on top of Ravenclaw*

Ravenclaw: The human body is 70% water. So we are basically just cucumbers with anxiety.

Slytherin: Excuse me, with the amount of salt and alcohol I consume, I’m more like an anxiety pickle.

Ravenclaw: Why are you so extra all the time?

Slytherin: *Slowly turns around in a rotating chair as their long cloak drags on the floor with their polished crown sitting on top their head. A cat is perched in their lap as their shiny, bejewelled, ring fingered hand pets it. The roar from the fireplace behind them casts an orange hue as the shadows darken their expression.* What do you mean?

Inter-House Couples

Gryffindor/Hufflepuff: Lots of cuddling by the fire. Playful competitions. Singing theatre duets together in the shower. Chilling with messy hair and old pajamas and not caring. Netflix binges. Very fluffy. Share clothes. Lots of little butterfly kisses.

Gryffindor/Ravenclaw: Does lots of things For Science! Movie nights, especially old films. Can talk about any topic for hours on end. Hiking together. Do crosswords together. End up in the hospital wing a lot for trying to invent new spells. Very sassy.

Gryffindor/Slytherin: DAMN. Acts like the perfect couple in public to make everyone jealous, but argue about chicken nuggets when alone. Still perfect though. Matching tattoos. Concert dates. Sneak out of class to hang out in the forest. 

Slytherin/Hufflepuff: Playful FIGHT ME’s. Sending each other memes randomly throughout the day. Cry together. A lot. Fall asleep on each other on the train. Teasing. Sneaking into the kitchen in the middle of the night. Deep, 2am sleepover conversations. Lots of PDA.

Slytherin/Ravenclaw: Holy Power Couple. Matching outfits. Fancy ass dinners at fancy ass places, or Taco Bell. No middle ground. Random fact competitions. Won’t tell each other their Tumblr URLs. Dye their hair crazy colours without telling anyone. Piggy back rides!!

Ravenclaw/Hufflepuff: Reading together. Baking cookies at 2am. Super supportive 24/7. Probably vlog together. Artsy Instagram selfies. Puns. Oh god, the puns. Write poetry/songs for each other. One does the other’s hair while studying. Hand holding is a must.

The Houses based on my friends

Gryffindor:
• “Hey guys look what I can do”
• dances and sings a lot unconsciously
• has weird hairstyles
• mood swings
• leaves essays until the night before
• mega ultra super nerd

Ravenclaw:
• finds really stupid things funny
• spends lots of time on social media
• says please and thank you all the time
• loves pillows
• amazing eyebrows
• uses a candy wrapper for bookmark

Hufflepuff:
• wears bows in hair everyday
• physically cannot be angry
• tries to scare everyone and fails
• very affectionate
• walks on tip-toes
• blushes uncontrollably 24/7

Slytherin:
• salty af 100% of the time
• swears every other word
• killer fashion sense
• carries dog around like a baby
• really contagious laughter
• will challenge anyone at anything

  • Slytherin: I like your pants.
  • Ravenclaw: Thanks, they were 50% off.
  • Slytherin: Well I'd like them 100% off.
  • Ravenclaw: What kind of store just gives stuff away?
  • Slytherin: No, that's not what I-
  • Ravenclaw: That's no way to run a business, Slytherin.

The houses as shit I’ve said

Gryffindor: “People say I’m brave for doing things but the reality is I’m just stupid enough to do stuff.”

Slytherin: “Fighting physically is dumb, why not just find out their secrets and blackmail them?”

Hufflepuff: “I wish I could own 10 dogs and have a therapy group with people while they pet them, that’d be nice.”

Ravenclaw: “I studied until 1 for this test so if I don’t pass I will genuinely contemplate suicide.”

Unpopular Opinion

Severus Snape abused his power as a teacher. No amount of past bullying, ‘you have your mother’s eyes’ quotes or death scenes can justify his verbally abusive tendencies towards school children.

Just saying.

  • Gryffindor: Ravenclaw you look like a person who play chess in her free time?
  • Ravenclaw: No, I do not.
  • Hufflepuff (overhears): She's more of a Scrabble person and very pretentious when she's playing.
  • Ravenclaw: That is outrageous I...
  • Hufflepuff (Continues): She will scoff at your word choice. Totally ignore her set of rules and use the word "poop" to win the game.
  • Slytherin (turns page): That's my girl.

Slytherin x Ravenclaw

- first of all, sytherin is absolutely adorable. like puppy-in-a-tea-cup adorable

- except the puppy is a pit bull and it’s angry 

- so like cute as hell and kind of terrifying 

- ravenclaw is weird; they spend more time in their own head than in the real world

- *stubs toe* “oh fudge

- has a weird fashion sense that they get bullied for

- until slytherin secretly took the bullies aside and threatened to shove their wands so far up their asses they sneeze splinters

- definitely partners in crime 

- like they would be notorious for their pranks, worse than Fred and George 

- slytherin would have sadistic glee in coming up with them

- ravenclaw figures out the logistics. nothing is more satisfying than seeing that marshmallow fluff land exactly where they wanted it to 

- most things they do are out of boredom 

- “hey so I found this in the potion stores the other day—" 

- "baneberry potion? dude, you could kill a city with that shit.”

- *smirks like the grinch* “I know." 

- they would skip a lot of class, but only because they know everything already 

- slytherin being protective of ravenclaw

- *hugs slytherin*

- “um”

- “..”

- “ok this can stop now”

- *hugs them tighter*

- “..ok”

- ravenclaw getting really excited about the nerdiest things, like figuring out a new potion or seeing a rare butterfly

- and slytherin just smiles and thinks they look so adorable

- not being very into PDA, but they always link pinkies whenever they’re next to each other

- braiding each other’s hair and taking it really seriously

- “I’m so glad we hate all the same people”