slicing quotes

A: “Cauliflower looks like sliced brain.”
B: “…”
A: “I mean, if you sliced a human brain, that’s what it would look like.”
B: “I don’t know what a sliced human brain looks like!”
A: “Looks like cauliflower.”

Submitted by: @a-million-starry-nights

Super Silly Sportarobbie Headcanon...
  • There is one instance where Robbie loves sportscandy-related things…
  • Anything to do with baths.
    • Bath oils
    • Bath bombs
    • Bubble baths
  • Heck, drop some mint leaves into the water
  • He LOVES IT
  • He will come out smelling sweetly of apples or oranges
  • He will refute he used them at all
  • Sportacus loves this about him
    • Because he didn’t influence
    • Robbie already DID THIS
    • He already had ‘sportscandy’ scented stuff
  • Though he objects when Robbie puts actual sportscandy into the water
    • Like sliced lemons, grapefruits and oranges
    • “Tháts á wàsté øf Spörtscándy Røbbíé!” 
    • Whatever.”
5

Imagine:On everyone’s 18th Birthday a Tattoo of their soulmates name appears.-Part 3.

You and the girls sat around the table, you had traced your hand over your tattoo more than 10 times. Smiling down at your wrist, you liked how his name looked on your skin but you couldn’t accept that he was your soulmate.

“Y/n, what’s wrong?"Malia asked as she took yet another slice of cake.

"It’s a mistake, its the wrong name"you answered, still tracing your fingers over the swirly ink.

"I don’t understand?"Lydia spoke out.

"Y/n the soulmate tattoo is never wrong? What makes you think that it is?"Allison asked.

"Stilinski-Uhm Stiles, he’s never actually looked at me in that way"you frowned.

"How do you know?"Kira questioned.

"I just know, trust me I’ve seen him when he likes a girl"you motioned over to Lydia.

"This is not what this is"you raised your arm.

"Then what is it?"Malia chomped.

"A mistake"You mumbled before taking the piece of cake from Malia.

-3hours later-
It was 1am, Lydia and Allison were sprawled out on your bed, snoring lightly. Kira was curled up on your bedroom’s sofa and Malia was asleep on your floor covered in blankets her leg up in the air.

You glanced at Malia’s awkward position and you shook your head smiling to yourself as you watched out the window, this had to be a mistake right? The smile faded from your face as you thought about Stiles.

Suddenly a shadow moving around in your front garden made your heart jump. It was getting closer to your door and you felt sudden fear.

Stumbling over your own feet you leaped over Malia and grabbed your baseball bat, unintentionally knocking over your lamp. It smashed on the floor, waking up Lydia and Allison.

"What was that?"Allison squinted her eyes, before rubbing them.

"And why do you have a baseball bat, I didn’t know you played baseball?"Lydia asked, curiously as she sat up.

"I don’t play baseball, someone’s in the front garden"you informed the two half asleep girls that were now pulling the blankets around their body.

"Well you aren’t going down there by yourself"Malia yawned as she stretched.

"And you are definitely not leaving me behind"Kira said tiredly.
"I’m sorry for waking you guys"you apologized.

"Seriously? We’d be mad if you didn’t wake us up"Allison replied as she took out a bow&arrow.

You all looked at her with widened eyes, slightly amazed at the fact she brought a weapon out of her pocket.

"Please don’t tell me that’s always in your pocket"Lydia laughed.

"24/7"Allison smiled proudly.

"Lets go get this intruder"Malia said as she whipped out her claws.
The five of you tiptoed around your house, before hearing a loud knock at your door.

You turnt to eachother.
"At least they knocked"Malia shrugged before lunging at the door, swinging it open.

You all ran towards the door with your weapons in the air.
You heard Allison shout, telling you all to stop. When you lowered your weapons you noticed who it was.

"Scott?"Allison asked.

"Yeah?"he looked up from behind his hands, he was shaking slightly.

"What are you doing here, we thought you were an intruder"you explained.

"I need your help at the high school"Scott said to the 5 of you.
When you arrived you noticed that there were 5 figures already standing in the car park.

You immediately recognized one to be your ‘soulmate’ Stiles, Liam Dunbar stood next to Isaac and Jackson. Theo made his way over to the group.

You heard Malia growl under her breath.
Stiles froze when he saw you walking over. He quickly rushed over to you, placing his hand on your arms.

"Y/n, you can’t be here, you need to go home"He ushered you back to the car.

"What?! Why not? Scott said he needed our help so we’re here?"you protested quickly.

"I’m going to kill Scott"he mumbled angrily.
You both walked back to the group,Stiles was swearing quietly to himself and when you re-joined the pack he dragged Scott to the side.

"What was that about?"Lydia murmured next to you.

"I’m not quite sure"you replied as you watched Stiles and Scott argue. Stiles had red cheeks when he returned, Scott looked frustrated.

"Okay so the new Alpha pack is inside the school, they have something that we want"Scott spoke out to the whole group.

"Deucalion has a new alpha pack?"you asked, slightly frightened.

"No, we don’t know who the leader is this time"Theo answered.

"We’ll split up and look for Mason"Liam ordered.

"They have Mason?!"Kira exclaimed.

"That’s who we’re saving to tonight"Stiles nodded.

"No matter what we’re getting Mason out of there, he must be terrified"you frowned before running back to the car.

You returned with your baseball bat, The pack looked at you and Stiles blankly.

"What?"you both said in sync.

"Why do you have the same bat?"Isaac asked.
You both looked at each other before raising your bats to reveal that they were the same.

He smiled down at you before Scott started to pair everyone off.
"Liam and Kira you take the Library”

“Allison and I will search the canteen whilst Isaac and Malia go through the changing rooms"Scott nodded. The two pairs left to start searching for your friend.

"Umm, Stiles and Lydia check the basements, and Theo and y/n can look in the classrooms"Scott quickly announced before he started to walk off.

"Nope not happening, Theo is not going with y/n. He can’t keep his hands to himself and he might just run off and leave her"Stiles shook his head.

"Fine, I’ll go with Stiles"you said.

"Did you just call me Stiles?"he smiled.

"Yeah I did"you smiled back.
The two of you hadn’t noticed that everyone else had left.

"Are you sure you don’t want me to take you home, because I can?! Scott will understand I just-it’s just- out of everything and everyone your the only one that feels like home. It’s always been us two like in 3rd grade up till now, everyone has come and gone but you? You’ve always been here if I lost you I don’t know what I’d do"he stuttered out before running his hands through his hair.

"I’m not going anywhere, I promise I’ll still be here tomorrow and you can bump into me again like you always do"you answered with a smile before holding his hand.

"Okay lets go save Mason"he looked towards the school.

Part 4??-Stiles’ 18th Birthday comes and he gets his soulmate Tattoo, although it’s not what it seems…

Overheard at school

Exams are in progress so here are some of the best things i’ve overheard in the last years…

  • “eat with your mouth closed, peasant”
  • “you joke, but stationary is fucking important”
  • “stop doing that you twa- twaddle.”
  • [holding up a mars bar] “this is the concept of murder”
  • “wait, does that mean there is a mountain high enough to keep me from getting to you?” “no I read a book about this-!”
  • [flipping frantically through a folder] “I’ve lost the drugs!”
  • “soz your sister is dead- but here, have some blood in a jar.”
  • on the last day of school, a guy in a gladiator costume [frustrated] “dude, stop stabbing me in the ass!”
  • “I know like two canadian people-” “who’s the other canadian bitch?” “… our english teacher?”
  • “come on, don’t you trust my pinky?”
  • [singing in a low baritone] “Even though your such a waaaank-er”
  • teacher, frustrated: what did obama do?
    student, quietly: your mum
  • [in biology, after a lesson on human temperature regulation] “is homeostasis a kind of dinosaur?”
  • “fetish isn’t necessarily sexual! I mean, ‘anna has a plant fetish’ just means she likes plants-” 
  • [abruptly] “lets overthrow the patriarchy”
  • [setting something over a bunsen burner] “ah yes, I feel like a scientist now”
  • male teacher: “You are not bees and I am not-”
    student: “a queen?”
    male teacher: “That is up for discussion”
  • [art student] “I get a bit hazy between the Renaissance and Cubism”
  • “don’t squash my crisps! what kind of passive-aggressive monster-”
  • biology teacher: “Mauritz, you don’t look like a giant mayonnaise sandwich.”
  • [in maths] “wait, there are more than two dimensions?”
  • english teacher: surely my higher level students… you are strong in the ways of criticism
  • “I identify as a genderfluid scorpion monarch”
  • [in the last english class of the year] “What is a symbol?”
  • “no it looks like a kidney-slash-orange-slice fetus"
6

     Loch made for the fridge, taking out a slice of key lime pie. He turned back to see Sky frowning at him as he placed the plate on the bar.
     "What?“
     "You know that’s in there for River, don’t you?” she asked accusingly, and he resisted the urge to roll his eyes; he was getting fed up of everyone bending over backwards for his youngest brother.
     "So?“
     "So, why do have to take a slice?”
     "I like it too.“ He shrugged, scooping up a mouthful, savouring the tangy sweetness of the lime filling.
     "Nanna makes it specially for him. She doesn’t really know how to help him, but she knows it’s his favourite, so she keeps the fridge stocked with it.”
     "It’s not like I’ve taken the last damn slice,“ he snapped, this time unable to stop his eyes from rolling. "You know what, maybe I’d be more willing to coddle him like the rest of you if he didn’t keep lashing out like a moody bitch at every little thing. In fact, if you did all stop spoiling him, and rewarding his behaviour, he might actually get on with it.”
     "It’s not coddling, Loch, it’s being sympathetic. Something I thought you were usually good at?“ She fixed him with a questioning look, raising an eyebrow.
     "Yeah, well, maybe I’m done with him being an ass to me all the time,” he huffed, taking another bite of pie.
     "Why? You used to put up with it from me and Bay all the time,“ she pointed out, looking confused.
     "Yeah, then you surprisingly both grew up,” he chuckled, dodging as she made a swipe at his arm. “Look, I get it, he’s down about what happened. That doesn’t excuse him throwing insults about without provocation.”
     "I think that’s just with you,“ Sky said with a half shrug.
     "Even more reason for me not to care, then.”
     "You aren’t going to help us with this plan, are you?“ Though it was a question, it was clear she already knew the answer.
     "Nope.” He finished up the last mouthful of pie, placed the plate in the sink, and gave her a small wave goodbye. “Good luck though,” he shouted back over his shoulder.

NAW MAN THEY ARE SO TASTY. I took them to my boyfriends place and cooked them up for his roommates. I couldn’t find many recipes online so I had to make up my own.
I seasoned them all with old bay, paprika, and salt and pepper and then stuffed all three with minced garlic, dill and rosemary, and lemons slices.
The big 22" I closed with twine and put on the grill. One of the smaller ones I put in a baking pan with potatoes and put it in the oven. Third I skewered and put on an open fire.
All three turned out AMAZING. Carp is sweeter and less “gamey” than most fish. I actually like them quite a bit!!
I definitely found fewer parasites in them than the other fish I have caught. Some bluegill and sunfish I refused to eat because of their insane parasite load. These carp had a couple of roundworms in their intestines at most.
Probably the best tasting fish that I have caught!