Many women […] unconsciously play out a type of scenario where they obsessively work to try to connect with a standoffish and noncommittal suitor. There is a kind of fantasy that if they can somehow win this dark creature over, they will score a more complete and healthy self-image. This fantasy and desire to feel triumphant about themselves often stems from troubled attachment experiences in childhood. The adult desire to win over critics through making an aloof man warm and connected sadly, typically, never delivers. The woman involved is often left to feel even more depleted and insecure about her very nature. The urge to correct a wrong or recalibrate a relationship is natural and oftentimes healthy. This urge can become dysfunctional when it is channeled into an obsessive and frenetic attempt to make a romantic relationship more than it can actually be.