sitting-in-my-dorm

Summer’s used to be so much better when you’re younger. Like, being able to go to camps and do all these crazy things with my brother. Now I’m just sitting in my dorm, getting wasted while crying over Hotch’s wife and son on Criminal Minds. Meanwhile, my brother has practically gone M.I.A. What has my life come to?

Story Time

So tonight I was sitting in my dorm room studying in my pj’s for a big test tomorrow and my roommate comes and knocks on my door with this scared look on her face saying there’s a guy at the main door and she can’t understand him (English is her second language so it made sense). So I go to talk to the guy, and he was very hard to understand (some sort of accent plus he was super mumbling, I had to lean in to hear him). He was asking where our RA lives, whether he was on this floor or not. I told him I know he’s on the floor I just don’t know the exact room and so on, I told him the RAs name and to go check the nametags on the other doors. I told him good luck and bye, and was about to shut the door but the guy reached and held my door open so I couldn’t close it. At this point I was starting to get a little freaked out, I asked him if there was anything else I could help him with and the guy started asking me for my number. I was polite and told him no thank you, I don’t like giving out my number to strangers, but he kept pushing. At this point I was extremely uncomfortable. I told him no I’m not interested and tried to leave again but he kept asking me over and over. Eventually I blurted out that I had a boyfriend, which made him back off enough that I could say bye and close/lock the door. 

Mind you this little incident didn’t happen at a party or on the street or anywhere where I was out in public, it happened where I live. In the middle of the night. I was in sweats and a hoodie and not asking for it, I was clear and blunt and the guy still wouldn’t leave me alone until I mentioned another male presence. I should be able to feel safe in my own (albeit temporary) home, but tonight I did not.  

I’m sick of getting harassed by strangers, and it scares me because I’m not allowed to have any form of protection in case incidents like this go further. That could’ve been a criminal that walked in off the street, and he very easily could’ve overpowered me. And it terrifies me that I’m not allowed to keep a firearm or anything besides a tiny little can of pepper spray with me for self defense. 

Something similar happened when I was seven years old. My father was out of town for the weekend on a business trip, leaving my mother and I alone for a while. Saturday night we hear a loud bang at our door, someone had kicked it in and was in our living room. Had my parents not kept that revolver under their bed and my mother not known how to use it, that night would’ve ended very differently. 

But what scares me the most is that one day I’m going to live in a world where I’m not allowed to keep a firearm in my home, when people who are willing to purchase and carry illegal weapons will have power over the law abiding citizens whose government has left them defenseless. 

Stories like the one with me and my mother seldom make the news, but hundreds and hundreds of crimes are prevented every year because people are still allowed to defend themselves, despite the strict gun laws already in effect in this country. Yet the stories where people are unable to protect themselves are plastered over every news station, crimes and tragedies that could’ve been prevented if the criminals had been evenly matched and the victims given a fighting chance.  

And there are people out there voting to take away the right for people like me to defend myself. Girls like me who live in big cities where it’s dangerous for them to live on their own, where even on a university campus they can get approached by strange men at night. 

Living a life of privilege where you’ve never felt the need to defend yourself does not give you the right to demand they be taken away from those that do. 

Please think twice before voting for gun control.  

so my goal for the week is to say hi and meet people in my hall

yes, i’m outgoing - i (had) work(ed) in an environment where i had to be, where if i didn’t have a personality of any kind, i would just kind of… fall flat. i learned how to not be quiet when i’m near people, how to actually talk to people like i’m a normal functioning being without feeling like i’m anything less.

but i guess i’m still shy as fuck & reliant on others. is it even possible to fake being outgoing?

memory 55333

I was sitting at the picnic table outside of my second semester freshman dorms and I put my shrooms into my subway sandwich. it still tasted disgusting and everything started looking like a distant hologram. my roommate played talamak by toro y moi and I got really sad. the song sounded so distorted and I told her to turn it off. when I hear it now I still want to cry.

When my guy and I were dating in college, he sits on my dorm room bed and says, “I need to talk to you about something important.”

And I think, oh no.

“So, um, if something happens from all this sex we’re having and you decide to keep it, because that’s totally your choice…”

*feeling my heart drop into my stomach*

“You have to know that there’s no way I can let a kid grow up without a father, so I’ll be around you for the rest of your life. That’s cool, right?”

Happy Father’s Day. You’re one of the good ones.

*sits happily in my dorm feeding all of my children applesauce* Okay Tamaner, you can’t be greedy buddy!!

Blood Orange reminds me of … Twin Peaks, walking sadly to early classes, wearing rain jackets and being cold, taking the bus for only two stops, very embarrassing social interactions, sitting alone in my dorm room after a shower, and dancing!

anonymous asked:

2,8,10,12,17,20,50

So…..I’m sorry for not….replying…I didn’t…see it…until now. Im so sorry

  • 2:How long have you known your best friend? - uh.,..since freshman or sophmore year of high school 
  • 8:Show a sample of your handwriting: /it aint pretty/
  • 10:Do you like the way that you grew up? Yes :) 
  • 17:Have you ever broken a bone? If so, how? Well, before I came to America, I lived in Bucheon and the neighborhood I lived in was a hill and I tripped and rolled down the hill and broke my wrist, I still get random pains when I use that wrist too much at times
  • 20:What was the last thing you watched on tv? I watched Suits and Major Crimes
  • 50:5 random facts about yourself: 
  1. Before winter break, I was sitting in my dorm with my roommate and one of my floormates and I was watching an episode of a show because of a plot I remembered. Well, by the end of the episode I realized. THE PLOT WAS WHAT I READ FROM A FIC AND I GOT SO MAD BUT IT WAS SO FUNNY 
  2. I am a Criminology major & an Intelligence Analysis minor
  3. I watch a lot of shows that are related to law enforcement or firefighters /lol the more you listen about me, the more of a loser i am/
  4. My roommate and I had a great room set up and we would just shout out feels throughout the night. /shout out to you roomie/
  5. I am so lost on what else I should write about me. SO uh….I like…ice cream :) /especially the jim fallon ben & jerry’s ayyyy/


im such a loser omg

anonymous asked:

Purple.

Purple: 10 facts about my room

1. There is a big box full of my dorm room stuff sitting in the middle of my room.

2. My desk is right next to my bed and the corners of it are really sharp.

3. There’s a crack in the frame of my window.

4. I have a bookshelf full of manga and Frozen books. :3

5. I have a couple of LoZ and Frozen posters hung on my wall.

6. I don’t remember the name of the shade of blue that my wall is painted. It’s slightly darker than Hawaiin Blue.

7. There’s a cardboard cutout of Anna and Elsa.

8. My room is right next to my sister’s.

9. I’m pretty sure I have way too much frozen merch in here.

10. I practically live in this room 24/7.

2

Day 100 - June 27, 2015

Month 4, Week 15

It’s so weird to think that I’ve been on hormones for 100 days already. Seems like I’ve only just started (I mean, in the grand scheme of things, I guess I have haha).

I went out with my mother earlier today to get groceries and then tonight I went out to friends of a friend’s house (2nd picture). Just a bunch of socializing, which seemed like a more direct version of last night. I kinda felt out of my social zone since there were parents, professors, and home owners there and I was the only undergrad student, but I had a nice time (to Joan or Rebecca or Jo if you’re reading this, I’m sorry I’m so boring and introverted haha)

And right now I’m just sitting in my dorm thinking about life after college and what I want to do in life. I think I started crying when I walked back into my dorm, for no currently apparent reason, but I’m sure it’s just thoughts and hormones running amok. 

The thing is, people always ask me what I want to do with my life and I give them a spiel about going back to school for an art degree after being able to afford it and going into the Peace Corps or whatever, but truthfully I literally have no idea where I’ll be. I have no goals like everyone else, and I’m terrified.

People tell me it’s exciting, but I’m just scared because I already come from an under-privileged family and I’m so worried about failure or becoming stuck in something I don’t want to be in. I’m terrified of being in the real world while trans and just navigating like that as a (probably) “unpassable” person and the difficulties that come with that. 

I’m terrified of being alone in that. I just keep telling myself the same spiel that I give everyone, but I have no real idea of what I am doing. I’m just breezing through life and I’m so very scared. I just want to survive, and that seems like an effort in itself.

Anyway, sorry for the wall of text. Much love <3

~Jae

i’ve made some friends in this program, others seem fine, others yet are tolerable, and a small group just piss me right the fuck off

and they’re all sitting in the kitchen right outside my dorm room

I’m at Berkeley right now, sitting in my dorm which is like a block away from campus

just to be aware, Berkeley is probably one of the most liberal schools in California, the U.S. even, I think

And they’re chanting “BLACK LIVES MATTER” over and over in Sproul Plaza and it’s just so cool hearing it from blocks away

people here are so passionate about this stuff, I fucking love it

:: here I am sitting in my dorm room drinking the 🍑 milkshake from chick-fil-a and it’s good.  and it’s super sweet. like super super super sweet. 

alicias-northernlights :: and thus the peach fits tom perfectly. 🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑

This would be a read more but I’m on mobile

…..

Honestly though I remember sitting on my top bunk in the dorms my sophomore year listening to “Come Back… Be Here” wailing into my pillow because I knew he was on an airplane flying out on his deployment and “I don’t want to need you this way”

“This is falling in love in the cruelest way… this is falling for you when you are worlds away”

He was everything to me and he had such a huge piece of my heart and now he’s nothing. We’re nothing. It’s so weird.