sitting-in-box

Things Overheard in Dorms
  • “That’s the fourth time this week you’ve brought up cannibalizing me. Should I be worried?”
  • “So needless to say, she peed on me.”
  • “Wow, this Heineken has such a smooth finish!”
  • “Do you think I can fit an entire orange in my mouth?”
  • “If I hear someone sing Hamilton in the shower again I’m joining them in their shower so I can drown them.”
  • “Someone just gave me a free cake. Should I be worried?”
  • “How did they manage to get that in BOTH shower stalls!?”
  • “How much caffeine is poisonous? Asking for myself, I’m actually worried.”
  • faintly, as though yelled from in a room down the hall “Can you come hand me my Swiss rolls? My head spins if I sit up.”
  • “Well you see, Marxism is actually” *anguished yelling from multiple people*
  • “Why is Ross sitting in a box in the hallway with a sweatervest draped over his head?” “Stress.”
  • “What’s the difference between an undergraduate research assistant and a random nosy 19 year old? Less than you’d think!”
  • “Let Bob Ross caress your happy little struggles away.”
  • “He talks like he thinks the world is waiting with bated breath to hear what he thinks about Fight Club.”
  • *screaming in harmony with a vacuum*
Actual quotes from doll forums that are grim out of context

“I can’t get her eyeball out with a hot gluestick, so I’m resorting to heating up a screw and screwing it in, then prying it out.”

“Her neck melt is pretty bad, one of the worst cases I’ve ever seen. It may be unstoppable at this point.”

“FOR SALE: assorted scalps. Some glue residue.”

“Taking offers on very hard-to-find Eurotrash.” 

“Have you tried rolling her eyes back with your thumbs? Can you feel them click?”

“Her ankle snapped off into her shoe and I can’t figure out how to get it out without damaging the shoe. I’m willing to sacrifice her foot if I can preserve the shoe–it’s one of my favorites.”

“Ohhhh… Sleep Forever! I WISH! haha”

“I haven’t bonded with her so she’s just sitting in her box.”

“I accidentally carved all the way through her lip….”

 “She only has a very slight pelvic crack! I am ELATED!”

“The Future is SOLD.” 

Nobody deserves to be forgotten- Tree bros/ Connor X evan

Tagging: @sticki-notes


Somehow, despite all odds, Connor had survived. His dad was furious with him, yelling about how he threw away everything he was given, Zoe was completely silent, fury in her eyes, and his mother was … heartbroken. They sent him to rehab, and Connor knew that deep down they all wished he hadn’t woken up.

He sighed, twitching slightly as he tried to get used to being without drugs, they had given him nicotine patches to help ease him into it but it barely helped. They had also put him on mood stabilizers, to help him out with his anger issues and depression. Getting him to take them was a fight every morning.

It had been a week and nobody came to visit him, and frankly it was exactly what Connor expected. It wasn’t like anybody noticed him.  It wasn’t like anyone gave a damn.  He looked up at the sound of footsteps, sneering at the nurse.

Keep reading

Try Me

Request from anon for a Jax x Reader where the reader is Unser’s daughter, and Hale keeps flirting with her so she asks Jax to pretend to be her boyfriend to get him to back off. Enjoy the smut ;)

A/N - I’ve done this a little differently to my other fake boyfriend/girlfriend imagines, as I don’t want to seem repetitive :)

Originally posted by journeyslegend

“You don’t even know me. Get to know me, I promise I’ll change your mind.” You’re glad your back is turned as you roll your eyes in annoyance, not sure how long you’re going to be able to keep up the nice girl attitude for.

Turning to face the determined officer, you smile apologetically, your following answer the same as it always is. “Thanks for the offer again David, but I’m not sure things would work between us.”

“Why? Why do you always say that?” he asks, frustration heavy in his tone, his hand on your car door to stop you from leaving. “Is it because of the MC?”

“No-” You open your mouth to start denying his claims, trying to think of another reason not to go out with a dude that you just don’t find yourself attracted to, when you come up with the perfect solution. “Actually, yes. You’re completely right.”

“Listen, I know you’re close with them, but they’re bad people, (Y/N). You could do so much better.” Here he goes again, you think. Same speech as always. He doesn’t even know SAMCRO like you do, nobody does.

“Thanks for the lecture, David, but Jax asked me to be his girlfriend a couple weeks ago, and I said yes.” The pure horror on his face has you biting your lip to contain your smirk. “See you around.”

Walking into the clubhouse, you scan the room swiftly, not spotting the man you’re hoping to see. “He around, Sack?”

“In the apartments.” he responds, walking into the kitchen with a pair of rubber gloves and a plunger. You grimace, knowing Piney’s probably blocked the bog again. Shaking your head, you walk towards Jax’s residence, knocking on the closed door.

“Room service.” you call sarcastically, your voice sickly sweet. The door opens within a few seconds, Jax’s eyebrow raised, his lips turned up into a grin.

“Lucky me, though you’re slightly overdressed for the kind of ‘room service’ I’m used to.” he says, opening the door to let you in. “Wasn’t expecting to see you till’ later on.”

“I know, but I need to talk to you about a little favour so I thought I’d grace you with my wonderful company.” you tease, plonking yourself down on Jax’s bed. Shutting the door, he sits on a box in front of you, pulling his cigarettes out of his pocket.

“You can just admit you missed me, babe.” He takes a drag, your eyes capturing the way his cheeks hollow as he inhales the smoke, the action stopping your train of thought. “What do you need me for this time, Princess?“

“Are you ever going to drop that nickname? You’ve called it me for years.” He grins cheekily, the smoke parting from his pink lips as he shakes his head at you, knowing deep down you love the endearment. “Anyway-”

A knock on Jax’s door stops you, the two of you turning to see Chibs’. “Sorry to interrupt. Cops are here.”

“Could they be any further up our asses?” Jax spits rhetorically, discarding his cigarette in an ashtray on his cabinet before standing up. You follow him as he leaves the room, Chibs leading the way as the three of you head out to the front. All you’re thinking is please don’t be Hale.

You curse silently as you see the man himself standing against his police car, Jax tensing up as he sets eyes on the deputy. “You’re here so much I’m starting to think you wanna patch in.”

Hale just scowls, his eyes shifting to you as you move from behind Jax, stepping to take position between the Scot and the VP. He watches you for a moment, and you know Jax catches it as you see him look at you questioningly, a pleading look on your face as you hope he just follows your lead.

“We got a call about a guy on a motorcycle running a red light a few blocks from here.” You sigh in disbelief, having a sneaking suspicion that his visit is more out of spite than anything else. “Just here to check your plates.”

“Jesus, how bad did you piss off my dad to go from murders to speeding tickets?” you sass, folding your arms across your chest. Chibs chokes down his chuckle from next to you, taking a drag from his cig to keep down his humour.

“I’m here because it’s my job, (Y/N), to make Charming a safer place for our citizens.” You roll your eyes, nodding slowly. “Something bothering you?”

“Woah, I thought you were here for us, not for the chief’s daughter. Check your plates and you can be on your way.” Jax states protectively, not liking the way Hale is speaking to you. The officer glares in response, his hand moving to rest on the handcuffs on his belt.

“I wonder how the chief would feel if he knew what you were up to with his daughter.” Hale snaps, his whole entity dripping with jealousy. You swallow nervously, trying to hide the anxiety from your face.

Chibs laughs loudly this time, a laugh so loud with amusement that you can’t help but smile. “Jackie, you naughty boy.”

You share a look with your ‘boyfriend’, him smirking, a cocky grin spreading across his face. You let out the breath you’ve been holding in, Jax’s reaction of enjoyment rather than horror making you feel confident in your lie.

“Oh, I get it now. You’ve got a soft spot for my girl here, and you’re pissed she chose me over you.” Jax says, rolling his tongue over his lower lip smugly. “Not that you were even an option.”

“You watch your mouth, Teller.” Hale warns, his eye twitching as he steps up to Jax, the tension heavy between the two men.

“Or what?” Jax challenges, anger radiating off him in waves.

“We got a problem here, boys?” The voice of your dad cuts through the ever brewing argument, him smiling at you loving before turning his attention back to the two amped up males. “Hale, you’re not stationed to be here.“

You, Chibs and Jax watch on as Hale turns into a flushed mess, having no decent excuse for ever coming to TM in the first place - though you all know why he did.

“Thanks, dad.” You hug your father as you speak, him squeezing you tightly before leaving you to it.

“So, something you need to tell me?” Jax asks as you sit on the bench outside, embarrassment crawling up your body. “Wasn’t aware I was taken, darlin’.”

He nudges you playfully, your hands covering your face as you groan. “He’s been pestering me for weeks, figured you were the best deterrent.”

“Thanks.” Jax deadpans, a small smirk on his face as he passes you the cig, you taking a drag as you think about what to say. “Glad I could be of service, I guess.”

“Thanks for going along with it. Guess I owe you one.” You tap off the ash and pass the stick back, biting your lip anxiously. “How about I do you a favor?”

“Sweetheart, no offence but the kind of favours I’d like to have you do for me aren’t exactly innocent.” You cough, his reply completely unexpected, your core tingling involuntarily.

“Try me.” you tease, your gaze flickering to his lips for just a second, your hand coming to rest on his thigh, fingertips inching upwards.

Next thing you know, the two of you are locked at the lips, thankful that the clubhouse is empty, the others off on runs and whatever else. “How long have we got?”

“Half hour, tops.” Jax mumbles, connecting his lips back to yours, his tongue in your mouth eliciting a moan from you. “I don’t see us lasting that long to be honest, darlin’.”

You squeal as you feel yourself being lifted, the pool table becoming your seat as Jax places you on top. You rip at his flannel, the buttons scattering all over the room. Your fingers explore up and down his chiseled chest as he begins to nibble and suck at your neck, your eyes closing in pleasure as he works his way down.

“Please, Jax…” you pant, your underwear positively soaked as his tongue slips over your exposed skin. He practically growls at your pleading, him ripping himself from you as he expertly undoes his jeans, the fabric pooling at his ankles, his boxers joining the denim.

Your eyes widen as his cock stands before you, you pressing your thighs together subconsciously as the ache grows stronger. “Like what you see, Princess?”

“Don’t get too smug, Jackson, gotta see if you can fuck me well enough, first.“ His hands pull at your shorts, you lifting your ass to help assist as he rids the material from your legs. Once he’s discarded the fabric somewhere across the room, he connects his lips back to yours, lifting and squeezing your ass as he moves to you to the edge of the table.

You barely feel him move your underwear to the side before he sinks into you, a gasp leaving your lips as he nuzzles into your neck, his teeth biting at your skin as he fills you up.

You dig your nails into his biceps as he moves out of you, slamming back in deeply. He pulls back, loving the expressions you make as he fucks you so well, the little moans and gasps leaving your lips making him want to explode there and then.

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to feel you around me, (Y/N).” You place your hands behind you to steady yourself, your pussy feeling even wetter as he talks to you. “You feel so fucking good, baby.”

“I’m so close, already. Fuck, just like that.” you whine as he hits all the right places, his strokes alternating in speed, but never lacking in power.

You rub your clit, clenching your pussy as you come, your mouth open yet nothing comes out. “That’s it, come for me, baby. Good girl.”

Jax grips the back of your neck as he speeds up his thrusts, his gaze locked on yours as he gets closer and closer to climaxing. You’re practically on fire as you feel another orgasm creeping up on you, the pure hunger in Jax’s eyes making you more sensitive than ever.

“Who knew you could take cock so well.” he whispers as he drills into you, a high pitched moan slipping from your lips. “Imagine if someone walked in right now, saw what a dirty slut you are, so desperate for me.”

His degrading words push you over the edge, a loud curse leaving you as stars fill your vision, Jax continuing to slam into you as he rides you through your high. “You gonna take my come, hm? Gonna let me fill you up like the good girl you are?”

“Yes, fuck, please Jax.” you plead desperately, your nails clawing down his stomach as he places hos forehead against your own, his eyes clenching shut as he let’s go.

He kisses you roughly as he comes inside of you, his hips gently rocking as his hot spurts shoot inside of you, your teeth sucking at his bottom lip.

He pulls out of you slowly, his juices and your own dripping from your satisfied pussy, your body feeling empty without his shaft inside of you.

Jax buckles up his pants, grabbing your shorts before lifting you up as if you weigh nothing. He carries you down the hall, just in time in fact as voices begin to fill the clubhouse.

Reaching his room, he places you down on the bed, his body crawling over yours as he moves a piece of hair from your face. “I’ve gotta go for a vote, but when I get back, we’re gonna see how sexy you look on your hands and knees.”

With that, he’s gone, leaving you shaken and hungry for more.

A/N - It’s been a whileeeeeee since I wrote some smut, but I’m so glad with how this turned out!!!! Hope you guys likeddddddd xxxx

There’s a little box sitting in Cas’ room.

The walls are still naked, the bed has no covers and nothing but the occasional borrowed book from the Bunker’s library resting on the nightstand indicates that anyone even lives in this room.

But there’s a hidden box under the bed, a box Dean only found by accident, when he was returning Cas’ freshly washed trenchcoat.
The box is empty - except for two photos (one of Claire, one of Sam and Dean) and a small, frayed black feather.

The box stays in the room, under the bed, even when Cas isn’t there.
It makes Dean breathe lighter, to know that Cas leaves something here that is valuable to him. That way he knows Cas is coming back sooner or later.

And he does.

Every time.

Because there’s something valuable waiting for him back home, in the Bunker.

And Cas wouldn’t abandon him in a million years.

Tease

A NIGHT AT HOME | HOSEOK VERSION

WORD COUNT: 3,440

warnings: graphic smut, dirty talk, spanking, oral sex, masturbation, sub!hoseok + dom!reader, dom!hoseok + sub!reader

Originally posted by morekpopmore

masterlist | ask | song


Sitting on the brilliant white fabric sofa in the sexiest, most shameless silky robe and matching lingerie you possessed you waited impatiently for your boyfriend Hoseok. The two of you had been together for almost three years, your relationship was absolutely perfect but you couldn’t deny how much you missed him each time he worked away for promotions. Hoseok was the lead dancer of the famous Kpop group BTS, and ever since you laid eyes on him in an overcrowded humid nightclub in Hongdae, you knew he was the one.

It was the way his body moved rhythmically to the music as he danced, thankfully alcohol provided him with enough courage to steal you away from your friends and show you a good time. Your bodies were hot, sweaty and fuelled entirely by an unquenchable thirst for each other; you didn’t remember much else about that night, mostly just the feel of Hoseok’s glistening back muscles beneath your desperate fingernails. Who knew that wouldn’t be the last time your bodies were lost beneath his bed sheets. 
Three years later here you were, the same desire for him circuiting your body.

He would be home soon.

Keep reading

Did this with number 1 from those post break up prompts I reblogged a few days back! 

Character A is on their way to sell the engagement ring they once bough for Character B (but the never got to propose) when they run into Character B again.

Wolfstar of course :)


Sirius wished the universe had at least had the decency to make it a cloudy, dreary, possibly miserable but that might be taking it a bit far, day. If this was what it had led him too, it was the least it could do, really.

He stared at the blue sky through the small front window of James and Lily’s flat, then back down at the small, velvet box in his hand. His thumb was poised to open it, nail in the soft crease between the top and bottom… and he couldn’t.  He couldn’t. If he saw it again he’d never get rid of it. And it was of no use to him. Not anymore. He’d spent enough hours staring at it, the gold rim, the small inside engraving. It had promised him everything and, now that everything had been lost, it was just a heart breaking reminder. It was worthless. He knew this. But he couldn’t see it. He couldn’t see it sitting there, cold in the box still. It should be with him. A sudden image of Remus kissing him, palms to his cheeks, and feeling the cool pressure of the ring on his left flooded through his mind. He pushed it away with difficulty.

He shoved the box into his pocket, grabbing a jumper from the back of the couch and pulling it roughly over his head while calling to James.

“Going out!”

“Okay!” A beat, and then, “Actually, wait, wait!”

Sirius turned from the direction of the door as James appeared in the kitchen doorway, tea in hand. His other rubbed the back of his neck.

“Are you, um…” He coughed, eyes flicking down to Sirius’ hands, searching, “Are you going…”

“Yeah.” Sirius said too quickly. He cleared his throat, “Yeah, and?”

James shook his head a little, shrugging and bringing his tea to his lips, “Nothing. Nothing, alright. Right…”

He shuffled his feet a little and Sirius rolled his eyes, “I’m fine,” He definitely wasn’t fine, “I’ll be back in a bit, yeah?”

James didn’t look any more at ease but he nodded, “Yeah.”



The day felt just as nice as it looked and Sirius scowled at the sun, defiantly putting his hood up and his head down.

The feeling of the box knocking against his thigh with every step was excruciating, a constant reminder of what he was about to do.

It should be with him.

His feet felt heavier with every step, every bump, and he found himself staring at the lump in his pocket. He clenched his fists tighter and tighter at his sides until his nails felt like pin pricks and the box felt like a scorching iron across his skin.

“Fucking hell-“ He dug it out of his pocket roughly, just as he collided with something— someone. Sirius’ head knocked right into a rather bony shoulder making his swear again, only to have the word mix with another curse.

“Shit, sorry, didn’t see.. you.. oh.”

Sirius’ heart started thrumming painfully in his chest. Remus straightened up in front of him.

Sirius went straight back to cursing the universe. Not now. God, please not today.

Sirius just stood there, unable to open his mouth. Remus looked… thin. His hair fell in messy curls over his forehead, as apposed to the usual neat swoop to the side. Really, Sirius couldn’t stop looking at his eyes. They were rimmed with soft purple, and as golden as ever. He thought he might drop to his knees, right there in the middle of the sidewalk, under the weight of the sheer longing that was coating his heart.

Remus opened and closed his mouth a few times before, “It’s a bit hot for a hood.”

Sirius blinked because what? “Wh- What?”

Remus’ cheeks flushed, “I- I don’t know why I said that. But- I- don’t you think?”

Sirius stared a moment more, then slowly raised his hand, swiping his hood from his head, “Right. The sun was just feeling a bit too…” He shook his head, still caught too off guard by how—normal—this conversation sounded.

Remus just nodded distractedly, eyes suddenly not on Sirius’, but trained on Sirius’ hand that was still resting on Sirius’ shoulder from removing his hood. He looked uneasy, panicked even.

Sirius watched as he swallowed thickly, voice coming out horse, “Meeting someone?”

Sirius knit his brows, cocking his head slightly at the sudden question, and the look crossing Remus’ face. How could I be meeting someone when that look is out there somewhere needing someone to kiss it away?

“No. ‘m not, why?”

When Remus’ eyes didn’t move to his, Sirius followed his gaze. His stomach dropped at what he found on the other end. The small, velvet box was still grasped in his hand. In plain sight.

“I- Oh. Fuck, no-” He realized what this must look like to Remus and it only made his heart tighten further. The mere thought that Remus could have it in his head that Sirius would ever, ever be with anyone else right now drove a knife in and twisted it, “No, Re- Remus,” Sirius corrected himself quickly at the way Remus winced.

“It’s fine.” Remus mumbled, “I- I don’t know why I asked. I guess I just…” He trailed off, “Dunno.”

Sirius’ mind whirled, desperately trying to find some lie to tell. He definitely wasn’t about to give Remus the truth, not with the way he wouldn’t even look at him.

“I- This is- I mean, I bought this for— these.” He corrected himself as a thought formed in his head, “I’m going to sell. This is- these are… cuff links. For James’ birthday. He- He didn’t like them.”

Remus’s eyes, which had still been fixed on the box, found Sirius’, “Oh.”

Sirius, gripped the box tightly in his palms, thumb, out of habit, wedging the opening but unwilling to follow through, “Y-Yeah.”

Remus’s expression suddenly changed. His eyes shifted from glazed over, and seemed to fill with a flicker of… something.

“Sirius…” Remus took a step forward.

Sirius’ eyes nearly closed at the way Remus said his name. Like he used to.

“Yeah…” Sirius breathed.

Remus’ eyes flit over his face as he stares down at him, “James’ birthday is in March.”

“I..” Fuck. “Yeah. It is.”

“It’s July.”

Sirius closed his eyes, taking in the close proximity of Remus’ presence and being silently furious with himself at the same time, “Yeah.” He sighed, defeated, “It is.”

Remus’ voice came out soft, “Can I see?”

Sirius’ eyes flashed back to the pools of bronze, panicked, “They’re really not much. Pretty plain. I mean-“ You never saw it. You didn’t want it. “They aren’t- It doesn’t really matter. He didn’t want them.”

Remus cocked his head, “How do you know?”

“Because he kind left before I could give them to y- him.” Sirius sighed, feeling heat bubble in his chest. He wasn’t sure what emotion it was, there were too many flowing through him.

Remus’ brow furrowed, “Well if you had stopped him maybe you could have found out. Let me see.”

Sirius flushed. They definitely weren’t talking about James anymore. “How was I suppose to know he wanted to be stopped?”

“Of course I wanted to be stopped!”

The silence that followed left what little space there was between them now heavy with Remus’ words. They were both breathing hard. Remus’ hand had somehow made its way over Sirius’ on the box. Sirius was burning at the touch.

Remus closed his eyes, letting a breath out through his nose, “Of course I wanted to be stopped.” He repeated.

Sirius stared at him, the crease between his eyebrows, the frown on his mouth, the tightness of his jaw. He swallowed hard, voice coming out shaky, “You can’t expect me to know that, that’s- that isn’t fair. You were so.. You were so angry with me, I thought-”

Remus opened his eyes, fixing them on the ground. The sun cast eyelash shadows on his cheeks. He looked more tired and thin than he had when they started. He shook his head, “No, it isn’t fair.”

Sirius’ heart tugged when Remus let his hand slip away.

Remus still wouldn’t look at him, “‘m sorry, I… I don’t know.”

He turned, carefully avoiding brushing against Sirius again, and started to walk away. Sirius reeled at the loss of contact, the sudden empty space in front of him. He was thrown back in time, standing in their old flat. He was staring into Remus’ tear stricken face one moment and was hearing the door slam the next. There was a velvet box in his pocket and he was very, very alone.

Not again. He decided. Not again.

“Remus.”

Sirius turned at the same time Remus did, eyes meeting. He was sure his looked wild. Remus’ looked just as untamed. He tried to slow his breathing, fingers tightening around the box.

He took a step forward.

“It isn’t cufflinks.”

Remus let out a breath, “No?”

“No.” He took another step, slowly closing the distance between them, “It’s-“ His eyes flitted over Remus’ face, hating ever worry marked there, every frown, each tired rim around his eyes, “God. It’s what I should have stopped you with.”

“You couldn’t have known-“

“I should have known.” He took the final step, thumb finally flicking the box open, “I should have let you know how much I…” He didn’t look down at the ring. Instead, he watched Remus’ eyes widen, he watched his lips part. He watched what he had wished he had watched for months. What he could watch for years. Remus’ eyes went back to his and they were glassy. He looked so tired. Sirius needed to fix it.

“Re..” Remus’ brows knit, eyes shutting at the nickname. He let out a soft noise when he felt Sirius’ hand on his cheek, holding him together.

“Re, I should’ve know. I- I know now, okay?” He ducked his head a little, desperately needed Remus to look at him, “Please, Re-“

But Remus was kissing him, hands on Sirius’ cheeks, a few tears on his own. And Sirius was melting, nearly dropping the box, the ring, as his arms made their way around Remus’ waist.

He closed the box as he kissed Remus. He had a lifetime to give him that ring. He needed this now, they needed this now. He slipped it into Remus’ back pocket, causing him to let out a watery laugh against his lips, and smiled as he wound his fingers in Remus’ hair, pulling their mouths back together.

And with Remus against him, laughing into his kiss, Sirius thought that maybe it wasn’t so bad the sun was out today after all.

Madrid? What I don’t like about Real Madrid is the values the club transmits. The players are great, i’m friends with most of them and we get along just fine. But the people behind the scenes, the people that sit in the VIP box at the Bernabeu are who I don’t agree with. Those people that are able to manipulate and abuse their power for their benefit in this country is what I don’t like. For example, seeing the prosecutor who went after Neymar and Messi for fraud but conveniently stayed silent when it came to Cristiano, sitting right next to Florentino without shame. But that’s nothing new, this has always been the case here (in Spain).
—  Gerard Pique 

indigowavesofrain  asked:

Consider: Rube Goldberg machines. Aliens being baffled by ridiculously complicated contraptions that perform an extremely simple task. They're pointless and I love them

^^ an incredible thought. Someone wanna expand on it? It’s been sitting in box for ages and i just do not have time to write a full reaction, but i wanted people to see it!

The Adrien Diaries...

7 Feb 2017

…I don’t know where Plagg is hiding at the moment, but when I find him he is a dead Kwami. Dead. I’m gonna transform and Cataclysm my own ring because this is ALL HIS FAULT!

So, apparently, I am developing some “cat-like” tendencies as a result of the mira-curse-lous… which is normally all fine and dandy. Feline reflexes, awesome. Better night vision, I’m down. The temptation of napping in the sun- all over it.

The urge to try and sit in every damn box I see– WHAT THE HELL! Because of course Marinette brought a box of croissants from her family’s bakery for the class today, and of course she had forgotten about setting the empty box next to her seat and OF COURSE I HAD TO TRY AND SIT IN THE STUPID THING WHEN NO ONE WAS LOOKING– only for Mari to come back for the box to find me crouched down in it.

Like a flipping psychopath. Good job Agreste.

And was that the end of it? No, no, because of frikkin COURSE some of the tape from the box had to get stuck on my hand as I tried to come up with an explanation for WHY I was in the damn thing. And do I pull it off like a normal human boy?

No. 

No I do not.

Instead, I start shaking my hand like a beauty queen on meth, and whimpering in distress.

…I had actual tears in my eyes over this, I kid you not.

Marinette helped me get the tape off, but couldn’t even look at me, and was so red (probably from holding in laughter) I thought she might faint. 

Now excuse me, I have the murder of a magical bobble-head to plan…

-Adrien If-I-Fits-I-Sits Agreste

Last prompt for @averca. I’m so sorry this is late! I’m hoping to at least get started on some of the other stuff that’s sitting in my ask box, and hopefully I can post more writing once I get out of school on Thursday. Thank you all for being patient!

Prompt: “You fainted, straight into my arms. You know, if you wanted my attention, you didn’t have to go to such extremes.”

“I can’t believe you dragged me here,” Will said as he stared at the building in front of him. It was a squat, brick structure situated in the middle of a large parking lot. It could’ve easily passed for another abandoned shopping center if not for the dark coverings over the windows, the enormous line stretching out the front door, and the sign beside the road that read: MELANCHOLY’S REALM: AMERICA’S MOST TERRIFYING HAUNTED HOUSE!

“C’mon, Will, don’t be such a buzzkill,” Cecil said. “I heard they use real chainsaws at this place. That’s, like, illegal in fifteen states.”

“I’m pretty sure that’s illegal in every state,” Will muttered, rolling his eyes. Cecil ignored his comment and joined the end of the line.

“What’s your problem with haunted houses, anyway?” Cecil asked as Will followed him.

Will bit his lip and shifted awkwardly, “They’re just… stupid and cheesy, that’s all. A bunch of halloween bogus to scam suckers out of their money.”

“I’m the one who’s paying for this, why do you have a problem with it?” Cecil said. A look of realization crossed his face, “Wait a minute, you aren’t actually scared, are you?”

Will threw up his hands defensively, “What? No, of course not!”

Cecil smirked, “Whatever you say, Solace.”

After several minutes of waiting, they reached the front of the line. A heavy set asian guy took the wad of cash Cecil forked over and gestured for them to enter.

They pushed through a pair of plain looking doors and found themselves in what looked like an abandoned grocery store. The room had no real walls, instead it was divided by enormous sheets of black plastic hanging from the ceiling that seemed to transform the room into a maze of twisting corridors and cramped rooms. Multi-colored lights played across the space, bathing everything in a medley of acid greens, neon pinks, and electric blues. Clouds of dry-ice smoke covered the floor and permeated the air with a sour odor. Shrieks and giggles echoed throughout the facility.

Will’s gut clenched as Cecil grabbed his arm and pulled him toward a group of several other patrons gathered in a corner. Will peered over the heads of the crowd and spotted a tour guide at the heart of the assembly. The guide was small and had an impish face peeking out from under a curly mop of dark hair. A dangerous spark glittered in his eyes, and his mouth was twisted into a devilish smirk.

“Hello, hello, hello,” The guide said. His eyes scanned the crowd as if he were a cat searching for prey. “Welcome to Melancholy’s Realm, the most terrifying place in America. My name’s Leo, and I am here to take you on a journey to meet the awful spirits that haunt this place.”

While he knew that the speech was hogwash, Will couldn’t help the chill that raced down his spine as he listened to the way Leo’s words seemed to drip with a certain eeriness. His gaze darted to Cecil, who hung on the guide’s every word, transfixed.

“The story of Melancholy’s Realm is an unfortunate one,” Leo continued. “Long ago, there was a hospital that was said to have the cure to any injury or disease one could suffer from. People started hearing about this place of miracles, and soon enough they were arriving by the truckload, begging to be helped. The nurses and doctors did as they promised, and even those with the trickiest illnesses were healed.

“However, strange things began happening to the patients. They would wander out of their beds at night, say things to the doctors that made no sense, and they began having violent mood swings. The doctors did everything they could to solve the problems, but nothing worked. Finally, one night the patients suddenly climbed from their beds and formed a sort of army. They smashed equipment and murdered the workers, and once they were done, they collapsed. Bodies littered every room of the hospital, and even the police were too horrified to enter. Finally, they removed the dead and investigated, but no one ever figured out what happened to the patients. It remains a mystery to this day. But, many say that at night you can hear the screams of the dead patients, telling of their guilt over killing the staff, and how they were transformed into the monsters that destroyed the hospital.”

The story’s end was punctuated by silence from the group, accompanied by far-off cries coming from the opposite end of the room.

Leo cleared his throat, breaking the quiet. “But now, it’s time for us to discover the truth, and venture into the dark depths of Melancholy’s Realm!” He stepped towards the entrance to the labyrinth of black plastic and gestured for the group to follow.

Will moved with everyone else, making sure to stay close to Cecil. His heart thudded in his ears as they made their way through a narrow passage and filed into a room.

The room was tiny, barely large enough to fit the patrons, actors, and props. A hospital bed stood in the center of the space, covered by a white sheet spattered with fake blood. Two actors wearing tattered scrubs loomed over the bed, their faces hidden by the darkness as they murmured to each other in hissing whispers.

“This is the operation room,” Leo said. “There are some gruesome rumors about this place. You never know what might come out of here.”

Suddenly, a figure shot up from the bed, tossing aside the sheet as a horrible cry tore through the air. The patrons shrieked and all dashed for the door at once.

Will’s heart was thundering in his chest now. Blood roared through his ears and the room seemed to tilt dangerously. Without warning, his knees gave out, and Will felt himself toppling downward as the world sank into darkness.

The only thing Will was aware of was the rough caress of asphalt against his back. His thoughts were muddled, and the world around him was lost in a murky haze. He blinked several times to clear his vision, and found himself lying in the middle of a parking lot, gazing up at a night sky dotted with stars.

“Are you alright?” a voice asked.

Will turned his head and spotted a boy with raven black hair and olive skin kneeling beside him. “I-yeah, I guess,” Will replied.

“My name’s Nico,” the boy said. A slight grin played on his lips, “I work in the haunted house and I saw your group going through. You must’ve been pretty freaked out, though. You fainted straight into my arms. If you wanted my attention, you didn’t have to go to such extremes.”

Will’s cheeks colored, “Oh, I, uh, sorry, I guess?”

Nico laughed and waved his hand dismissively. “Don’t worry about it,” he said.

“How long have I been out?” Will asked.

Nico shrugged, “About ten minutes, nothing huge.”

“And my friend-Cecil-he was with that tour. Does he know where I am?” Will said, propping himself up on his elbows.

“I’m not even sure if he saw you,” Nico replied. “He seemed to be having the time of his life. Don’t worry, you’ll be reunited as soon as the group comes out of the building.”

Will’s eyes twinkled with amusement, “That sounds like him.”

“I take it you don’t go to haunted houses much?” Nico asked.

“No, not really,” Will admitted, “I only came tonight because Cecil insisted. Honestly, I’m terrified of stuff like this.”

“You aren’t the only one. You wouldn’t believe how many people I’ve had in this same situation over the last few weeks,” Nico said.

An amused smile spread across Will’s face, “You mean other people have fainted in there?”

“Yep. My friends decided to rent this abandon grocery store about a year ago start a haunted house. I agreed to work for them so I could make an extra buck. Although, I hate showing my face, so most of the time I just end up playing covered hospital corpses like I was tonight. Our place must actually be pretty terrifying, though. The number of people I’ve had to pull out of there is shocking,” Nico explained.

Will shrugged, “Good to know I’m not the only one.”

Their conversation came to an abrupt end when will heard Cecil shouting for him across the parking lot.

“I’ve got to go,” he said.

He turned to walk away, but before he could move, Nico snatched his wrist. “Wait, before you go, let me give you my number.”

Will gaped at him and Nico averted his eyes. “Y-you know, for safety purposes,” he said. “I want to make sure you get home okay.”

Will’s face lit up like a thousand light bulbs, “Sounds fine to me.”

Special Instructions (1/?)

Summary: Drunk Emma really likes pizza. She also really happens to like the cute delivery guy who seems content to carry out all of her wishes via the “Special Instructions” box on the website.  (AO3)
Rating: M (eventually)
Word Count: ~1700

This has been burning a hole on my desktop for a couple months now and I just really felt like if I didn’t start posting it would probably never get finished… I’m a couple chapters in with the writing but I think this is going to end up being like between 10 and 15 chapters, all roughly the same length if I can pull it. We’ll see how that goes. Anyway, this was gonna just be like a cheesy smut fic originally but I apparently like to overthink things and it became slightly cuter of an idea…

@stubble-sandwich THANKS FOR LETTING ME GUSH ABOUT THIS STUPID IDEA WITH YOU. Look at me, finally posting the fuckin pizza guy au… christ…

Special instructions: pls make smiley face with pepperoni, i could use something happy right now

She’d typically have left the box blank but Emma was currently full of self-pity and a little too drunk to really care how she appeared to the rest of the world.

Two years she’d spent with Walsh. Two years of warm embraces and whispered I love you’s and sweet kisses and integrating him into her close-knit group of friends despite some heavy resistance – especially from David; she reminded herself to give her brother a hug later for trying – and for what? 

For him to just “reconnect” with his ex at what was supposed to be their engagement party?

“I’m so sorry, Em. I never meant to hurt you like this. It just… happened. I can’t help how I feel.”

She scoffed in disgust. What an asshole. A total prick.

She finished off her fifth – sixth? – bottle of beer and popped open another. Maybe after another few she’d forget the sight of him with his tongue down that other woman’s throat. Maybe she’d forget the shock and guilt on his face when she’d dropped her glass of champagne at seeing them together, stunned to see her betrothed blatantly cheating on her by the bathrooms while their party guests mulled about in the main room, completely clueless.

Keep reading

Monsta X In Ikea

Masterlist

Hyunwoo (Shownu):

  • doesnt even want to be here
  • minhyuk told him they were just going on a drive and dragged him in
  • too many things going on
  • overwhelmed™
  • picks a display and sits there the whole time while minhyuk runs around
  • sat there for so long ppl thought he was a mannequin and everyone freaked out when he stood up

Hoseok (Wonho):

  • only there for the meatballs
  • didnt even take the long maze through ikea to get there
  • just took the elevator
  • almost cried when a kid there smiled and waved at him
  • actually cried when he tried to take the maze through the displays and got lost
  • called his mom to come find him
  • an actual baby

Minhyuk:

  • has his map, pencil, and list
  • reADY 2 GO
  • Got sidetracked by the smol plants
  • “Look how smol, hyunwoo i waNT IT”
  • skips around and nearly topples over all the diplays
  • runs back and forth in the store to show Hyunwoo all the cool, unnecessary things they can get
  • “but i need all these fairy lights!”

Kihyun:

  • “why is there so muCH TO DO?”
  • tries to pronounce all the names
  • fucks up really bad but enunciates everything so he rubs it in Minhyuk’s face
  • sticks pretty well to his list of things, but can’t decide between all the options
  • “do i want the white six shelf horizontal stand or the black eight shelf vertical stand?”
  • makes jooheon push him in those giant flatbed cart things
  • makes “beep beep!” noises to get people out of the way
  • “sir, you’re 23 years old pls sTOP”

Hyungwon:

  • tries out all the beds and sofas
  • also rates the duvets
  • “hmm this one is soft but doesn’t quite have enough plushness’
  • also rates how soft the sofa pillows are
  • started talking out loud and people began asking him to help out in picking the right sofa
  • “it’s great in color, but not the best for the butt”
  • fell asleep in the beds one too many times and got banned
  • it’s ok bc he has all of the duvets at home, he just likes trying out beds
  • still stares when he drives by

Jooheon:

  • didn’t follow the floor arrows and is now circling the lamps section, trying to act like he isn’t freaking out
  • wigs out in the kids section and touches all those paper ball things hanging from the ceiling
  • buys a lot of unnecessary things
  • like?? that’s stupid jooheon u dont need plates in pink and red and black and white
  • “but i like the colors!!! I cant pick!!”
  • crawls into one of the sink cabinets to see if he can if
  • he can
  • but now he’s stuck and the ikea employees have to call the fire department to get the grown ass man out of their bathroom display

Changkyun (I.M):

  • sits in the giant box of dinos in the kids section and names them all
  • took the paper meter stick things at the entrance and made a fort w them
  • tied them to the shelves in the back where most employees dont go
  • he lives here now
  • occasionally ventures out to the restaurant and just takes a pudding cup
  • that’s all
  • he goes back to his fort after that
  • they find out nine weeks later and find him sitting on his ass in the middle of eight hundred plastic pudding cups
  • “hi do u have any other pudding flavors? im getting sick of this one”

A/N: Ya done fucked up, kinza goddamn. the only one that makes any sense is changkyun thiS IS A MESS IM SORRY TO THE ANON THAT ASKED FOR THIS I SUQ

To Newt, With Love

Request: “Hi-Hi! I’ve read your newt x reader stuff and they are so nicely done, I like your style! Could I request for angsty newt x reader, pure angst. Sadness and all that. If you don’t mind of course! Something like ‘reader likes newt but newt is stupidly oblivious and he still hanging on leta/is with tina most of the day. At the end, the reader just 'poof’, out of touch. Thank you!”

Word Count: 2,643

Pairing: Newt x Reader

Requested by Anonymous

Requests are currently open! Feel free to send one in


The midnight blue dress draped over your body shatters the beams of golden sunlight streaming through your window, sending specks of glittering light all over the white walls of your bedroom and the pastel green sheets of your bed. You hardly notice, though, as you struggle to clasp a delicate silver necklace around your neck. The fine chain, soft as gossamer, tangles around your fingers, fighting your attempts to secure it. The struggle proceeds for a minute before you can drop the chain and watch it shimmy into its place in the dip between your collar bones. A beautiful gift from an old friend.

An old friend you’re visiting in five minutes, if the godfather clock standing in the corner is correct. A bundle of nerves flutter in your stomach. You haven’t seen Newt in months. Any time you wrote and told him you’d be able to make time, he’d been too busy. Then NEWT exams rolled around and every spare second of every day was dedicated to scrawling out notes and rereading the same chapter five times until you could nearly recite the entire textbook word for word. The grueling effort paid off, though, earning you high grades in every subject.

Today, you celebrate with your best friend of seven years. The two of you agreed to meet at your house at noon before traveling out to Hogsmeade to enjoy butterbeer at The Three Broomsticks and then find a dancing hall. You know Newt has a fondness for dancing unmatched by many others, even if he may be reluctant to admit it.

One more glance in the mirror satisfies you. Not a hair is out of place, your elegant silver earrings brush the tops of your exposed shoulders, and the dress gleams, not a hint of lint on it. You step from the mirror’s gaze and cross the room, enjoying the clacking of your heels against the wood floor. On your dresser sits an ornate black box. Swirls carved and painted white loop around the wide case, meeting on the top to circle around Newt’s full name.

Keep reading

Truce

Pairing: Sam x Reader

Word count: 1608

Warnings: Smut, safe sex of sorts - not really- (pulling out method - keep in mind this is not a way of safe sex since it may only prevent pregnancy and you should never rely on it, unless you’re in a committed relationship with someone you really know and trust! Always wear a condom!!), slight choking!kink, slight dom/sub, slight dirty talk. And btw having sex on top of a pile of boxes can be dangerous.

A/N: This is my entry for Hazel & Dreamer’s 1k/2k Writing Challenge (  @idreamofhazel @impala-dreamer

Prompt (Jared bonus) #4: ‘I’m gonna come in and kick your little 5’4” ass’

Thanks to my beautiful -inside and out- friend @whywhydoyouwantmetosaymyname for the read over and the awesome exchange of kinks and preferences. Just an everyday conversation.

[Feedback is the best way to show your love] 


Truce

Heart stammering against your ribcage threatening to burst out through bone and skin, lungs burning from the bad breathing, the furniture around you turns blurry as your short legs move faster. Heavy footsteps follow you from close behind, he’s at your heels, getting closer by the second. You take a sudden turn right, down into a dark corridor, just in time to avoid the grip of long fingers on the back of your shirt, and you enter the first open door to your left. Closing the latch and stepping away. Adrenaline keeps pumping through your veins making you jump a little when his entire weight collides against the closed door.

“Y/N!” Sam bellows on the other side, voice all breathy and croaky.

Your chest heaves and you try taking deep breaths to calm yourself down, which is almost impossible considering you’re still laughing.

“Open this door, now!” he roars.

Keep reading

5

TEXTS FROM DARK AND ANTI (feat Google!): Part 45

Bonus:

So my boyfriend was never allowed to watch Friends as a kid so he’s just now getting the chance to binge the series, and since I’ve had this prompt sitting around in my ask box for a while, I figured I’d give you all a little taste of my reality. ^_^

Parts 1-44 here!