sitting-in-box

anonymous asked:

"I died when she did." I'm curious how you would interpret the 'she' in the world of Sanders Sides.

This angst prompt has been sitting in my ask box for too long. Too long. Unfortunately, all my ideas for it have been funny. I give up. Me and my dark sense of humor.

Things Overheard in Dorms
  • “That’s the fourth time this week you’ve brought up cannibalizing me. Should I be worried?”
  • “So needless to say, she peed on me.”
  • “Wow, this Heineken has such a smooth finish!”
  • “Do you think I can fit an entire orange in my mouth?”
  • “If I hear someone sing Hamilton in the shower again I’m joining them in their shower so I can drown them.”
  • “Someone just gave me a free cake. Should I be worried?”
  • “How did they manage to get that in BOTH shower stalls!?”
  • “How much caffeine is poisonous? Asking for myself, I’m actually worried.”
  • faintly, as though yelled from in a room down the hall “Can you come hand me my Swiss rolls? My head spins if I sit up.”
  • “Well you see, Marxism is actually” *anguished yelling from multiple people*
  • “Why is Ross sitting in a box in the hallway with a sweatervest draped over his head?” “Stress.”
  • “What’s the difference between an undergraduate research assistant and a random nosy 19 year old? Less than you’d think!”
  • “Let Bob Ross caress your happy little struggles away.”
  • “He talks like he thinks the world is waiting with bated breath to hear what he thinks about Fight Club.”
  • *screaming in harmony with a vacuum*

Note: this is a continuation of a post // extremely long

101 reasons why Jikook/Kookmin is my ultimate OTP
or 101 times Jikook made my heart flutter (Part 2)

PART 1

51) A jikook compilation wouldn’t be a compilation without THE back hugs.

Hands on waist…

Chin on shoulder…

52) Not long after Jimin tweeted a pic of ramen, Jungkook indirectly replied to him by posting FOUR selcas of him along with a message telling him his ramen looked bland. idk about you but i found this interaction cute.

53) The artistic couple.The muscle pig and manggaetteok drawings that were featured in Snow App. They even drew the chicken drawings on the menu at Isac. I can imagine them sitting and drawing random things together. ㅠㅠ 

54) Jimin posted not one but three videos on Jungkook’s birthday, which means he wished Jungkook three times on SNS and made my head spin thrice.

55) Jimin and Jungkook took photos of each other sleeping.

56) When Jungkook thought there was no camera around when they were rounding the corner so he went up to Jimin and slid his hand around his waist. Little did he know they got caught on camera. I’d like to thank Yoongi’s vj for this awesome footage.

57) The many times Jimin has summoned Jungkook for Armys. In simpler words, Jungkook always tweets something after Jimin, and we all know how seldom he appears on Twitter.

58) “hyung has cute toes” Okay but like who lingers around his friend’s photo shoot and randomly blurts out that he has cute..toes????

59) The look! Jungkook’s expression when he’s feeding Jimin earns him a spot on this list haha. Tbh They’re kinda like eyefucking eo when jimin’s being fed. look at Jimin’s eyes. Apart from that I like how Jungkook fed him.

60) Their interactions the whole ISAC. Masterlist 👣

61)  How can I miss this? Jikook in Japan..this one has a special place in my heart. Back in 2016, it had been just a casual discussion between me and my friends on kakao. Never thought jikook would continue displaying PDA every single time they go to Japan. What’s more when they have very strict no-camera policy during concerts.

62) The amount of heart eyes they shoot at each other.

63) When they had a dinner date in the dorm to promote Mala Hot Chicken. What baffled me was that Jungkook mentioned beforehand he wanted to sleep but he still accompanied Jimin. I’m soft.

64) Jimin has made it very apparent, truly obvious that he likes jungkook. Whether it’s liking him as a dongsaeng, or just someone he’s extremely comfortable with, Jimin always, without failing, reminds us who he dotes on. “Why do I like you so much?” Lately, I’ve been crazy because I like Jungkook so much. I think of this as a start of something beautiful, and I am so glad Jimin didn’t even hesitate in expressing his feelings towards the maknae. I think this might have helped jungkook unwind. Look at jungkook now. That’s some character development right there :)

65) Massage. Quoted line from AHL mentor, Tony Jones “They are very touchy feely and to them, it’s nothing. I’d walk into the room and Suga’s massaging V’s neck or Jimin’s giving Jungkook an intimate back massage..”

66) When Jungkook bent down so he would get closer to Jimin and put the rein-kook headband on Jimin’s head. They’re separated a lot of times during fansigns but somehow they managed to get tgt at the end.

67) When Jungkook blows a kiss, then turns to Jimin whose lips are puckered and does the same to him, using the same fingers he used earlier. Okay I’ve been meaning to say this. Realistically speaking, if you pucker your lips and you put your fingers on them, wouldn’t your saliva stick to your fingers? I’m not trying to imply anything here, just genuinely asking haha.
140529 Ameba Studio

68) When a webtoon artist gave Jimin two dolls, but Jimin decided to give one to Jungkook. She even posted a webtoon of them. To be honest who wouldn’t?

69) *screams to the people in the back* ALL-NIGHTER FRIENDS!!! As written by the man himself, “ALL the time, it’s just the two of us doing something at night. I don’t know what we do”

70) Jungkook scribbling hearts all over Jimin’s birthday drawing. He’s one whipped man.

71) Just other instances Jungkook and Jimin flirting on stage. 

//gif above isn’t mine//

72) When Jimin and Jungkook chose each other when asked “if you were a girl, who would you date?”

73) The shocking fact that Jungkook demanded an apartment from Jimin as a graduation gift. Like, apartment? of all things? What kind of domesticity is this?

74) The way Jungkook takes care of Jimin even though he’s the younger one, and how Jimin is there when he’s the one seeking comfort.

75) I will never forget the Gayo Back hug, ever. I’ve mentioned back hug somewhere above, but this is different.This deserves a point of its own.

76) When Jimin took off one of his rings at the airport and gave it to jungkook.

77) When Jungkook stopped in front of Jimin during his part in For You at Osaka concert, and kind of directed the lyrics for Jimin. Jimin just couldn’t stop smiling afterward :(((
The lyrics are:
It smells like you
The road that I walk on
I plug my earphone to my status
My true feelings lie beyond there

78) When Jimin and Jungkook steered away from the bunch and instead opted for some alone on the cruise. people say you smile the brightest when you’re with someone you love, yes?

79) The fact that Jimin wanted to become napa cabbage after seeing Kook dressed up as a bunny, so he could eat him, albeit choosing to be cheese initially. What even is that statement lol 👣 

80) The morph of their dynamic. I kind of miss their old moments, when Jimin was bolder, more carefree, and Jungkook seemed to be too shy to reciprocate. (on camera). Now they have matured. They have grown up well. A wave of nostalgia sweeps over me. The transition of their relationship is extremely beautiful.

81) When Jimin became Jungkook’s makeup artist for a day, hovering around the set, even drawing a pic of a bird that’s used as a prop later.

82) their size difference might be exaggerated at times, but you really can’t deny that it is cute, even if it’s not much.

83) When Jungkook changed the lyrics in Spring Day to Jimin.                      
Like a small piece // Of Jimin // That floats in the air 

84) When Jungkook showed to the world what a sweet boyfriend he is,making jimin laugh, sitting him on his lap, hugging him on his birthday. Sweet sweet jungkookie.

85) Let’s state the obvious- 21CG choreos!!! i love how they evolved, just like their remarkable, legendary nmd lift.

86) Their sensual dance covers.

87) When Jungkook guides and encourages Jimin during games/missions.

88) The many times Jimin has been spotted wearing Jungkook’s clothes, despite the well-known fact that Jungkook doesn’t share clothes. Newsflash: Jungkook wears Jimin’s too!

89) We know Jungkook knows Jimin like the back of his hand, but that doesn’t mean that Jimin knows any less. I think they spend time together way too much.👣

90) How often the word “JIMIN” trips off Jungkook’s tongue- this what fascinates me the most. At one time he even mistook Jin for Jimin.

91) Jimin’s eagerness to kiss Jungkook for his Coming of Age, being the first one to hold out a hand for a game of Rock Paper Scissors. Bon Voyage season 1

92) When Jimin waited over an hour for Kook to finish filming BTS Flower Boy mini drama, even though he’d finished his part. Jimin couldn’t even stay mad at him for not telling, like how fond is he?


93) The fact that Jungkook is more than comfortable speaking in banmal with Jimin.He once said in Idol Party that he prefers talking in jeondaetmal (polite language) with his hyungs but look at the amount of times he’s dropped the honorific and called Jimin by his name. uhm, let’s talk about treating the other as equals?

94) Jimin and Jungkook, the human embodiment of Piske Usagi.

95) When Jungkook’s bro drew Jungkook as Muzi and Jimin as Con, the inseparable duo on Kakao. Bro knows. 👣

96) In Kkul FM 2016, When Jungkook and Jimin nearly intertwined their fingers . Scoffs bh seemed to think it’s okay to abruptly cut off their scene. What intrigues me most is that they weren’t even looking but their hands still somehow managed to find their way around. Also other instances they hold hands. I love how Jungkook’s slightly bigger hands envelop Jimin’s smaller ones. *Jimin’s pinky tho!*

97) How they’re destined to meet. The fact that they’re both from Busan, have matching moles, Jungkook’s bro named Junghyun and Jimin’s bro named Jihyun..imagine what would’ve happened had Jimin not been the last one to enter Bangtan.

98) When Jimin said he’d be looking at the ocean with Jungkook but Jungkook straight up rejected him and chose to go on a trip with his bro instead. It was quite a strong statement but a moment later Jungkook proved it wrong by reaching out and squeezing Jimin’s hand underneath the table, kinda like a reassurance that it’s all part of a joke. He cares. He truly does.

99) During Jin’s birthday prank at MAMA, these two couldn’t keep their hands off each other. The moment they entered the bathroom, they almost shut everything out-talking to themselves, picking on the cake- until the members gave them the signal to stop w/e they’re doing. Months later Mama kindly revealed another footage, this time consisting of just them, in the bathroom, jungkook right in the middle of buttoning up his jacket, wearing nothing underneath. How was I supposed to sit still?

100) When Jungkook and Jimin take skinship to a whole new level, or simply put, the times Jikook makes us question the real intention behind their acts and excessive skinship.

101) Last but not least, Perhaps my all time favorite moment- When Jungkook was caught observing Jimin’s every move, literally had his eyes only on him.

(Mark 1:17 onward)

I super love this video bc the song chosen matched so well with the situation- like they wanted to reach out but couldn’t so they stayed put, could only observe the other from far…

and that’s it!
thank you, you made it to the bottom of this post! In short, everything about jikook makes me feel content. I had thought of doing more  but despite my brain literally screaming at me “Include this! You forgot this!”, I had to stick to 101. Anyway, I hope this mends your longing hearts. Have a lovely day! Thank you for reading!

Bonus because I have to:

when the members revealed on BTS KKul FM 2017 that Jungkook bought a birthday present only for Jimin. Am I your favorite hyung?

When Jungkook, the youngest in the group, called Jimin who is 2 years older than him a baby. 애기야가자 !

anonymous asked:

this is a silly question, but what do you mean, "the flavor profiles might have shifted?"

Not at all silly! I’m referring to the fact that changes in manufacturing processes, ingredients, and breeding of both flora and fauna mean that the food we eat today may taste significantly different from the food of 100 years ago and yet we still refer to it by the same name.

The most well-known example of this, of course, is the Gros Michel/Cavendish issue; until the 1950s, Gros Michel bananas were the most common export, but now mostly in the US we eat Cavendish bananas, which have a different flavor. Cooking with Gros Michel and Cavendish bananas are going to get you different end results because they taste different; Rex Stout’s banana bread won’t taste like Sam Starbuck’s, and also any seasoning in the recipe (spices, etc) is aimed at complimenting the Gros Michel, and may not work as well on the Cavendish. (This is in theory, I don’t know if he has a banana bread recipe or if it was written pre or post Cavendish.) 

The same goes for a lot of fruits and vegetables – we haven’t necessarily changed breeds but we’ve certainly begun aggressively breeding for flavor or size or color, and we’ve also begun importing from hundreds or thousands of miles away, affecting freshness and flavor along the way. Which means a tomato today is a different beast from the tomato of fifty years ago. 

In one of the Nero Wolfe short stories, Wolfe gives a recipe for corn: roasted in the hottest possible oven for forty minutes, husked at the table, and served with only butter, salt, and pepper, “it is ambrosia”. But that’s for corn grown at a farm less than three hours from Wolfe’s home, picked less than half a day before it was cooked, and picked by hand just as it came fully ripe – Wolfe knows there’s something wrong and solves a murder because one delivery of his corn is of poor quality (too old, and picked too far previously). Stout acknowledges in his recipe that it’s unrealistic to be able to get corn like that, but corn grown from different strains, picked in Mexico, sorted by machine and shipped to Chicago where it sits in a misting box on a shelf for a few days before I buy it and take it home, that’s going to taste different. I’m not slamming the globalization of food (though elements of it are certainly an issue), but it’s simply a fact: they won’t taste the same. My corn, due to breeding and preservation techniques, might even taste better! But it will be a different taste. And when you’re dealing with the delicacy of flavor that Rex Stout often does, that can cause real issues. 

This extends to all kinds of things. Flour is milled differently now, and made from different grains; most things that used sugar cane or sugar beet sweetening prior to 1970 now use high fructose corn syrup (though this is a trend that is slowly reversing). Processed foods, like macaroni and cheese boxes or Cheerios or Jello, have changed ingredients to improve flavor or ease of cooking or health benefits to the people who eat them. Meat is fed differently (beef being fed primarily on corn because it bulks cows up like crazy is the most evident example) and that affects the flavor of the meat, too.

This gets even more bonkers the deeper you go. The reason modern recipes, especially baking recipes, often call for both butter and milk is that they used to call for cream, but people stopped buying cream and started buying lower fat milk, so now you have to use your lower-fat milk plus butter added to simulate cream. A recipe that called for cream was less likely to be made when people stopped buying cream, and new recipes in the second half of the 20th century were primarily the province of ad companies, who wanted you to buy their product and cook with it. If people were more likely to cook with a product that used butter and milk instead of cream, the ad companies would design recipes that way. 

So if you’re looking at a recipe from before the 1980s or so, understand that the recipe is designed with ingredients that might be vastly different from, and yet share a name with, the ingredients of today. Which affects the flavor of the finished product.  

Time travel is so weird, am I right? 

If you enjoy reading about food history, consider passing me a ko-fi!

anonymous asked:

Headcanon: Virgil can be REALLY cat-like, as in literally acting like a cat. We already know that he will hiss when annoyed, and he likes sitting on things that aren't meant to be sat on, but he will sit basically ANYWHERE. He once sat on Logan's notes after Logan had annoyed him, and once the other sides found Virgil in a box. Logan: "why are you sitting in that box?" Virgil: "I don't know, it looked like it'd fit me and I wanted to find out."

I couldn’t resist. Sorry for the poor quality phone picture lol

Actual quotes from doll forums that are grim out of context

“I can’t get her eyeball out with a hot gluestick, so I’m resorting to heating up a screw and screwing it in, then prying it out.”

“Her neck melt is pretty bad, one of the worst cases I’ve ever seen. It may be unstoppable at this point.”

“FOR SALE: assorted scalps. Some glue residue.”

“Taking offers on very hard-to-find Eurotrash.” 

“Have you tried rolling her eyes back with your thumbs? Can you feel them click?”

“Her ankle snapped off into her shoe and I can’t figure out how to get it out without damaging the shoe. I’m willing to sacrifice her foot if I can preserve the shoe–it’s one of my favorites.”

“Ohhhh… Sleep Forever! I WISH! haha”

“I haven’t bonded with her so she’s just sitting in her box.”

“I accidentally carved all the way through her lip….”

 “She only has a very slight pelvic crack! I am ELATED!”

“The Future is SOLD.” 

I realize that when most people think about interpreters, they either confuse them with translators or just imagine them as boring people who sit in a box all day and repeat the boring speeches politicians give at conferences. Somehow I doubt that most people have ever thought about how important interpreters have been for the way we communicate and how the world today would not be the same without them. And I also doubt that people have ever viewed interpreters as badass or as heroes. Therefore, I’d like to tell you about:

The Interpreters at the Nuremberg Trials

I guess most of you already know what the Nuremberg Trials were, but here’s a short explanation for those who don’t: The Nuremberg Trials were a series of military tribunals, held by the Allied forces after the Second World War. They took place in the city of Nuremberg and they were most notable for the prosecution of prominent members of the Nazi leadership. As the people involved with the trial were American, British, French, German and Russian, it had to be conducted in four different languages. Which is why they needed interpreters.

I recently went to an exhibition about those interpreters and even though it was a really small one, it was super impressive- because of what I learned about them.

Here are some of the most interesting and impressive facts:

·         Before the Nuremberg Trials, simultaneous interpreting did not exist. Before the trials, people believed that the human brain was not capable of something like that. The simultaneous interpreting equipment used for the trials was the very first of its kind.

In this video you can see a demonstration of the simultaneous interpreting system. Later you can also hear some of the interpreters’ interpretations:

·         None of the interpreters had ever worked as a simultaneous interpreter before. (The reason was, of course, that this profession had not existed before the trials.) Some were translators, consecutive interpreters or linguists, and others were ordinary people who had grown up bilingually, or people who had fled from Germany before the war and lived abroad for a while. The bar was set very high and they had to pass difficult and complex tests, including mock trials, before they were allowed to interpret at the tribunals. Since none of them had any kind of experience with simultaneous interpreting, they had to train themselves in a very short time.

·         Without simultaneous interpreting, the Nuremberg Trials would have taken much longer or might not even have been possible at all. Before the trials, only consecutive interpretation was used. (With consecutive interpretation, the speaker stops every few minutes and the interpreter repeats what he said in the target language.) Since there were four court languages (English, German, French and Russian), using this interpreting technique would have prolonged the trials significantly. As the Cold War started soon after the end of the tribunals, it is unclear whether they could have been finished, had they taken any longer.

·         Simultaneous interpreters were not the only language professionals working at the trials. If a witness spoke neither of the four court languages, consecutive interpreters were brought in to interpret their testimony- which was then interpreted again by the simultaneous interpreters. There were also interpreters sitting behind the judges to help them communicate. The American and the British judge were seated next to each other, so they could exchange their thoughts, but if they wanted to talk to the French and Russian judge, they needed the help of their interpreters. Translators also worked at the trials. They translated the notes taken by the court reporters in shorthand. These translations were then compared to recordings of the simultaneous interpreters’ interpretations, to make sure that they hadn’t made any mistakes which could influence the outcome of the trials.

·         In total, the team consisted of approximately 50 interpreters, 200 translators and 100 people who compared the interpretations with the court reporters’ shorthand. Of course, this generated a lot of paperwork. One photo taken by the American military photographer Ray D’Addario shows employees in the court’s document room standing literally ankle-deep in translation paperwork.

·         Interpreters at the trials worked 85 minute shifts on their own. (In contrast, simultaneous interpreters today work in teams of two and take turns in shifts of up to 30 minutes.)

·         Sometimes, interpreters were not able to finish their shift- not because of exhaustion, but because they could no longer handle the psychological strain and could no longer force themselves to listen to what was being said. The trials dealt with the worst atrocities committed by the Nazis- war crimes, genocide, mass murder and crimes against humanity. Many interpreters had to be replaced -either because they left or because they returned to the translation department- and later many said that they had nightmares because of those trials. One interpreter, however, also said that he didn’t really catch all the details of what was being said, because he was always way too focused on getting the grammar and the vocabulary right. (And yes, that happens. A lot.)

·         One of the most famous photos of an interpreter at the Nuremberg Trials does not actually depict an interpreter. The photo in question shows a young woman in a red suit wearing headphones and explaining the simultaneous interpreting system to the press. However, she was not actually an interpreter, but a lawyer’s secretary. The reason she was chosen as a model for this photo was that she always had the most fashionable suits, because her mother was a tailor.

·         Interpretations and Translations could influence the outcome of the trials. The fact that recordings of simultaneous interpretations were checked against the translations of the court reporters’ shorthand limited the risk of communication mistakes, but could not eliminate it completely. Many Nazis, like Göring for instance, tried to use this to their advantage- which, of course, put the interpreters under immense pressure to get everything exactly right. Richard W. Sonnenfeldt, the lead interpreter for the prosecution, remembered Göring asking him: “Could you find me a good lawyer? Although I might need a good interpreter even more than a lawyer.” After the trials, some defendants claimed that they had only been found guilty because of translation or interpretation mistakes. Interpretation or translation mishaps could also negatively affect the prosecution, though. A mistranslation of the word “Freimachung” (translated with “liberation” instead of “clearing”) caused a big problem for chief prosecutor Robert H. Jackson during his first confrontation with Göring in court. Of course, some words also have more than one meaning. And sometimes, one meaning was more incriminating than the other. Those words quickly became bones of contention.

More about the equipment

·         Unlike interpreters today, the interpreters at the Nuremberg Trials did not have soundproof booths. Therefore, they had to be careful to not be distracted by ambient noise all the time. Their booths were nicknamed “the aquarium” because they were made of glass. However, those booths were not even closed glass boxes. There was one big glass panel in front of them, and smaller glass panels were used to separate the booths. The headphones were not soundproof either, and probably also not very comfortable.

·         Everyone had to wear headphones, except for the guards. There were more than 300 headphones in the court room at all times.

·         Each interpreter had a sign which said “slow”. They would hold it up if they wanted the speaker to talk more slowly. If a speaker did not see this (or ignored it), either the interpreters or a technician could push buttons which would light up differently coloured lights on the speaker’s table. The orange light told the speaker to slow down and the red light was a signal that there was a technical problem and the session had to be suspended until this problem was fixed.

What influence did those interpreters have on the future?

·         Together with other interpreters who worked at the trials, Colonel Léon Dostert, the head of the interpreters at the tribunals, founded the United Nations Interpretation Service. The technology used in Nuremberg became the basis of modern interpreting technology and ever since the Nuremberg Trials, simultaneous interpreting has become an integral part of international politics and diplomacy. Without simultaneous interpreting, international institutions like the UN, NATO, the EU or the WTO would look completely different today.

These interpreters did something that was considered to be impossible before the Nuremberg Trials. People believed that the human brain was not capable of simultaneous interpretation and yet those interpreters did it. In a short time, they taught themselves how to do it. They worked with newly developed equipment that was far from perfect: Uncomfortable headphones, people tripping over cables and no soundproof booths. They worked shifts which were nearly three times as long as shifts today, and all the time they had to listen to descriptions of the horrific atrocities committed by the Nazis. But even though they were constantly faced with these horrors, even though they were under immense pressure- the interpreters, translators, and other language professionals involved with the trials still did their job. They all put themselves through immense stress, psychological strain and possibly trauma, to make the trials happen and to make sure that Nazi war criminals received the punishment they deserved. Without those interpreters and translators, it would not have been possible. The simultaneous interpreters in particular were pioneers of their profession. Without them, simultaneous interpreting might not even exist. And without simultaneous interpreting, international institutions like the UN or the EU would look completely different today. The world might look completely different, too. After all, during the Cold War, fast communication with people who spoke different languages was essential. Who knows what might have happened without interpreters?

So, yeah, I don’t want to hear people calling interpreters boring ever again.

Just in case you’re interested in hearing more about this topic from someone who has actually lived through all this; here’s a speech by Siegfried Ramler, one of the interpreters who worked at the Nuremberg Trials:

[Finally, I’m not a historian or anything like that; I’m just telling you what I learned at the exhibition and from a few articles about it, because i found it interesting and super impressive. So if there’s anything that’s not correct, I apologize. Please let me know and I’ll correct it at once!]

Try Me

Request from anon for a Jax x Reader where the reader is Unser’s daughter, and Hale keeps flirting with her so she asks Jax to pretend to be her boyfriend to get him to back off. Enjoy the smut ;)

A/N - I’ve done this a little differently to my other fake boyfriend/girlfriend imagines, as I don’t want to seem repetitive :)

Originally posted by journeyslegend

“You don’t even know me. Get to know me, I promise I’ll change your mind.” You’re glad your back is turned as you roll your eyes in annoyance, not sure how long you’re going to be able to keep up the nice girl attitude for.

Turning to face the determined officer, you smile apologetically, your following answer the same as it always is. “Thanks for the offer again David, but I’m not sure things would work between us.”

“Why? Why do you always say that?” he asks, frustration heavy in his tone, his hand on your car door to stop you from leaving. “Is it because of the MC?”

“No-” You open your mouth to start denying his claims, trying to think of another reason not to go out with a dude that you just don’t find yourself attracted to, when you come up with the perfect solution. “Actually, yes. You’re completely right.”

“Listen, I know you’re close with them, but they’re bad people, (Y/N). You could do so much better.” Here he goes again, you think. Same speech as always. He doesn’t even know SAMCRO like you do, nobody does.

“Thanks for the lecture, David, but Jax asked me to be his girlfriend a couple weeks ago, and I said yes.” The pure horror on his face has you biting your lip to contain your smirk. “See you around.”

Walking into the clubhouse, you scan the room swiftly, not spotting the man you’re hoping to see. “He around, Sack?”

“In the apartments.” he responds, walking into the kitchen with a pair of rubber gloves and a plunger. You grimace, knowing Piney’s probably blocked the bog again. Shaking your head, you walk towards Jax’s residence, knocking on the closed door.

“Room service.” you call sarcastically, your voice sickly sweet. The door opens within a few seconds, Jax’s eyebrow raised, his lips turned up into a grin.

“Lucky me, though you’re slightly overdressed for the kind of ‘room service’ I’m used to.” he says, opening the door to let you in. “Wasn’t expecting to see you till’ later on.”

“I know, but I need to talk to you about a little favour so I thought I’d grace you with my wonderful company.” you tease, plonking yourself down on Jax’s bed. Shutting the door, he sits on a box in front of you, pulling his cigarettes out of his pocket.

“You can just admit you missed me, babe.” He takes a drag, your eyes capturing the way his cheeks hollow as he inhales the smoke, the action stopping your train of thought. “What do you need me for this time, Princess?“

“Are you ever going to drop that nickname? You’ve called it me for years.” He grins cheekily, the smoke parting from his pink lips as he shakes his head at you, knowing deep down you love the endearment. “Anyway-”

A knock on Jax’s door stops you, the two of you turning to see Chibs’. “Sorry to interrupt. Cops are here.”

“Could they be any further up our asses?” Jax spits rhetorically, discarding his cigarette in an ashtray on his cabinet before standing up. You follow him as he leaves the room, Chibs leading the way as the three of you head out to the front. All you’re thinking is please don’t be Hale.

You curse silently as you see the man himself standing against his police car, Jax tensing up as he sets eyes on the deputy. “You’re here so much I’m starting to think you wanna patch in.”

Hale just scowls, his eyes shifting to you as you move from behind Jax, stepping to take position between the Scot and the VP. He watches you for a moment, and you know Jax catches it as you see him look at you questioningly, a pleading look on your face as you hope he just follows your lead.

“We got a call about a guy on a motorcycle running a red light a few blocks from here.” You sigh in disbelief, having a sneaking suspicion that his visit is more out of spite than anything else. “Just here to check your plates.”

“Jesus, how bad did you piss off my dad to go from murders to speeding tickets?” you sass, folding your arms across your chest. Chibs chokes down his chuckle from next to you, taking a drag from his cig to keep down his humour.

“I’m here because it’s my job, (Y/N), to make Charming a safer place for our citizens.” You roll your eyes, nodding slowly. “Something bothering you?”

“Woah, I thought you were here for us, not for the chief’s daughter. Check your plates and you can be on your way.” Jax states protectively, not liking the way Hale is speaking to you. The officer glares in response, his hand moving to rest on the handcuffs on his belt.

“I wonder how the chief would feel if he knew what you were up to with his daughter.” Hale snaps, his whole entity dripping with jealousy. You swallow nervously, trying to hide the anxiety from your face.

Chibs laughs loudly this time, a laugh so loud with amusement that you can’t help but smile. “Jackie, you naughty boy.”

You share a look with your ‘boyfriend’, him smirking, a cocky grin spreading across his face. You let out the breath you’ve been holding in, Jax’s reaction of enjoyment rather than horror making you feel confident in your lie.

“Oh, I get it now. You’ve got a soft spot for my girl here, and you’re pissed she chose me over you.” Jax says, rolling his tongue over his lower lip smugly. “Not that you were even an option.”

“You watch your mouth, Teller.” Hale warns, his eye twitching as he steps up to Jax, the tension heavy between the two men.

“Or what?” Jax challenges, anger radiating off him in waves.

“We got a problem here, boys?” The voice of your dad cuts through the ever brewing argument, him smiling at you loving before turning his attention back to the two amped up males. “Hale, you’re not stationed to be here.“

You, Chibs and Jax watch on as Hale turns into a flushed mess, having no decent excuse for ever coming to TM in the first place - though you all know why he did.

“Thanks, dad.” You hug your father as you speak, him squeezing you tightly before leaving you to it.

“So, something you need to tell me?” Jax asks as you sit on the bench outside, embarrassment crawling up your body. “Wasn’t aware I was taken, darlin’.”

He nudges you playfully, your hands covering your face as you groan. “He’s been pestering me for weeks, figured you were the best deterrent.”

“Thanks.” Jax deadpans, a small smirk on his face as he passes you the cig, you taking a drag as you think about what to say. “Glad I could be of service, I guess.”

“Thanks for going along with it. Guess I owe you one.” You tap off the ash and pass the stick back, biting your lip anxiously. “How about I do you a favor?”

“Sweetheart, no offence but the kind of favours I’d like to have you do for me aren’t exactly innocent.” You cough, his reply completely unexpected, your core tingling involuntarily.

“Try me.” you tease, your gaze flickering to his lips for just a second, your hand coming to rest on his thigh, fingertips inching upwards.

Next thing you know, the two of you are locked at the lips, thankful that the clubhouse is empty, the others off on runs and whatever else. “How long have we got?”

“Half hour, tops.” Jax mumbles, connecting his lips back to yours, his tongue in your mouth eliciting a moan from you. “I don’t see us lasting that long to be honest, darlin’.”

You squeal as you feel yourself being lifted, the pool table becoming your seat as Jax places you on top. You rip at his flannel, the buttons scattering all over the room. Your fingers explore up and down his chiseled chest as he begins to nibble and suck at your neck, your eyes closing in pleasure as he works his way down.

“Please, Jax…” you pant, your underwear positively soaked as his tongue slips over your exposed skin. He practically growls at your pleading, him ripping himself from you as he expertly undoes his jeans, the fabric pooling at his ankles, his boxers joining the denim.

Your eyes widen as his cock stands before you, you pressing your thighs together subconsciously as the ache grows stronger. “Like what you see, Princess?”

“Don’t get too smug, Jackson, gotta see if you can fuck me well enough, first.“ His hands pull at your shorts, you lifting your ass to help assist as he rids the material from your legs. Once he’s discarded the fabric somewhere across the room, he connects his lips back to yours, lifting and squeezing your ass as he moves to you to the edge of the table.

You barely feel him move your underwear to the side before he sinks into you, a gasp leaving your lips as he nuzzles into your neck, his teeth biting at your skin as he fills you up.

You dig your nails into his biceps as he moves out of you, slamming back in deeply. He pulls back, loving the expressions you make as he fucks you so well, the little moans and gasps leaving your lips making him want to explode there and then.

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to feel you around me, (Y/N).” You place your hands behind you to steady yourself, your pussy feeling even wetter as he talks to you. “You feel so fucking good, baby.”

“I’m so close, already. Fuck, just like that.” you whine as he hits all the right places, his strokes alternating in speed, but never lacking in power.

You rub your clit, clenching your pussy as you come, your mouth open yet nothing comes out. “That’s it, come for me, baby. Good girl.”

Jax grips the back of your neck as he speeds up his thrusts, his gaze locked on yours as he gets closer and closer to climaxing. You’re practically on fire as you feel another orgasm creeping up on you, the pure hunger in Jax’s eyes making you more sensitive than ever.

“Who knew you could take cock so well.” he whispers as he drills into you, a high pitched moan slipping from your lips. “Imagine if someone walked in right now, saw what a dirty slut you are, so desperate for me.”

His degrading words push you over the edge, a loud curse leaving you as stars fill your vision, Jax continuing to slam into you as he rides you through your high. “You gonna take my come, hm? Gonna let me fill you up like the good girl you are?”

“Yes, fuck, please Jax.” you plead desperately, your nails clawing down his stomach as he places hos forehead against your own, his eyes clenching shut as he let’s go.

He kisses you roughly as he comes inside of you, his hips gently rocking as his hot spurts shoot inside of you, your teeth sucking at his bottom lip.

He pulls out of you slowly, his juices and your own dripping from your satisfied pussy, your body feeling empty without his shaft inside of you.

Jax buckles up his pants, grabbing your shorts before lifting you up as if you weigh nothing. He carries you down the hall, just in time in fact as voices begin to fill the clubhouse.

Reaching his room, he places you down on the bed, his body crawling over yours as he moves a piece of hair from your face. “I’ve gotta go for a vote, but when I get back, we’re gonna see how sexy you look on your hands and knees.”

With that, he’s gone, leaving you shaken and hungry for more.

A/N - It’s been a whileeeeeee since I wrote some smut, but I’m so glad with how this turned out!!!! Hope you guys likeddddddd xxxx

it is a wide night and your throat is closed at the base of it. his hand and your hand are two satellites that have lost contact, searching for each other in the bleakness of space and grasping only loneliness. you and he sit in a cooling car and lean the seats back and struggle to say the intangible. you ask him for a secret so for once you can hold a vulnerable part of him. after a silence so long it breaks your ribs he says that there’s nothing in him but horror stories. he tells you to watch your hunger, that even honey tastes bitter when you drown in it.

it is a slow moon. you are alone now and the road is a howl and you won’t put on your seatbelt. your fingers are tight, could explode your bones into the loving embrace of a brick wall. you want to call him and ask him if he has ever accidentally drank his own sorrow because yours is sitting against your voice box and won’t choke down. instead you turn the radio up in the hopes that you will feel something when you listen to this song.

it is an indigo blackness. you never learned how to hold your own body without letting bits of it fall out. your hands are on the steering wheel and at 60 miles an hour if you wanted it bad enough you could come back to dust. when people fall out of love with you they make swatches of big bruised absence and if you were a color you’d be all of that, painted under your toes up to your numb lips. does he know that your smile is a paradox, a sad happiness, an empty full. does he know that you sing so loud to drown the voices out. the funny thing about dying is that humans live beside it until the moment they yank the wheel the wrong way and collide with their end.

it is a venom moment. your mouth is turning into a wasp nest. you are so close to calling him and telling him everything. show him you know what it’s like to be a falling elevator. tell him that you have secrets too and they might have matched him. tell him that you’re a safe place if he needs a person to run to about his brain burning. explain about how even though neither of you has got a steady tongue you can both talk out your ice flows until they melt into the dawn ocean. turn this car and yourself and your life around. bite down on it and suck the snake out.

it is time to go home. you turn up the radio. in the bitter morning, you make yourself tea with honey.

Nobody deserves to be forgotten- Tree bros/ Connor X evan

Tagging: @sticki-notes


Somehow, despite all odds, Connor had survived. His dad was furious with him, yelling about how he threw away everything he was given, Zoe was completely silent, fury in her eyes, and his mother was … heartbroken. They sent him to rehab, and Connor knew that deep down they all wished he hadn’t woken up.

He sighed, twitching slightly as he tried to get used to being without drugs, they had given him nicotine patches to help ease him into it but it barely helped. They had also put him on mood stabilizers, to help him out with his anger issues and depression. Getting him to take them was a fight every morning.

It had been a week and nobody came to visit him, and frankly it was exactly what Connor expected. It wasn’t like anybody noticed him.  It wasn’t like anyone gave a damn.  He looked up at the sound of footsteps, sneering at the nurse.

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Tony being your sugar daddy + a “boobs guy” would include:

pairing: tony x reader

warnings: oh no hide your children this is about women willingly using their bodies and benefitting from it

a/n: hello i’m back after 4 months having graduated high school and being a bigger tony slut than ever before

also this is the longest “would include” i have ever written but i’ve been getting requests for this for months and it took me forever to get around to writing so enjoy

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A Potato By Any Other Name

A few days ago, there was a fic about a potato, and then I thought about this, which I first heard a few years ago, and has stuck with me (K and I gift each other potatoes sometimes, because we’re huge sappy nerds) Big thank you to @rhysiana for the brilliant title, and to my SWN chat group for the encouragement!

So, plot: Derek gives romantic gifts, but Stiles is still a little insecure about the future of their relationship. When he gets with the “Derek loves me” program, he gives Derek a rather unconventional gift.

On AO3 here!

*****

The flowers are beautiful. A perfect balance of deep purple heliotropes and white lilies. They even came in a glass vase, simple but elegant. The note is equally simple and sweet: Thinking of you, as always. Love, Derek.

Stiles sighs as he places the flowers on his kitchen table, they look a little bit ridiculous on the aged, slightly worn surface, but he smiles at them nonetheless.

It’s a nice gesture, but he’s not sure he’s ready to believe they mean what he wants them to mean.

The phone call is unsurprising, but not unwanted. “Hey, Der,” Stiles answers with fond exasperation, “You have impeccable timing.”

Derek chuckles lightly and asks “Did you uh, do you like them?” He sounds so hopeful that Stiles knows even if he was allergic, he’d say “yes” and keep them on his table until they dried out and fell apart.

“They’re beautiful, thank you,” Stiles answers sincerely. He can feel the way his grin goes soft, melting into the private smile that only Derek can tease out of him. He knows Derek can hear it in his voice, can tell from the way he inhales a quiet sigh that makes Stiles’ heart swell.

Stiles knows that Derek is going to say something that Stiles has no good reply to, going to ask if Stiles is ready to accept that Derek’s invested in a future for them. But the truth is he just isn’t; he can’t quite convince himself that it’s possible that Derek is going to stick around for him, not forever.

So before Derek can ask, Stiles launches into planning their weekly dinner with his dad the following night.

*****

The chocolates come three days later. They’re Stiles’ favorite dark chocolate assortment, and they’re delicious. The note is just as sweet: Stiles, I saw these and thought of you. Love, Derek.

When Stiles brings the last of the box to pack night, he pretends that everyone’s chocolate-induced excitement distracts him from how Derek’s face falls.

When Derek pulls him aside later, questions written all over his face, Stiles stops them from spilling from Derek’s lips by pressing his own against them. He tries to say everything he wants to with gentle sweeps of his tongue and hands that hold on a little too tightly.

*****

When the box of comic books and assorted superhero things arrives, Stiles laughs out loud into his empty living room and calls Derek.

Derek answers the phone with a wary “Stiles,” and Stiles feels like the worst boyfriend in the world.

“I got the box, and I love it. Thank you so much!” Stiles replies, a little overly cheerful, but still genuine and honest. He’s a lucky man, and most days he thinks he doesn’t deserve Derek. Which is basically the problem, when it comes down to it. Derek has been trying to convince Stiles that their relationship is what he really wants, and Stiles has been keeping him at arm’s length, too caught up in the remnants of his teenaged self doubt to… see what was right in front of him.

Shit. He is the worst boyfriend in the world.

Derek is in the middle of “I’m so glad! I think I got all your favorites-” when Stiles interrupts with a half-shouted and mildly frantic “Come over tonight!

There’s a brief pause, before Derek drawls out an elongated “Okay?”

“I have something to give you,” Stiles insists, suddenly overwhelmed with the need to see Derek. To talk to Derek and apologize. To look him in the eye and make him understand that he is everything that Stiles wants, and that he’s ready to stop being such an asshole, if Derek will just forgive him.

“Stiles,” Derek admonishes lightly, “You don’t have to get me things just beca-”

“Yes, Derek,” Stiles retorts, “I really need to give you this. Like, really really. So just come over, okay? Please?”

Derek sighs and Stiles knows he’s won. He grins at Derek’s put upon “Sure, babe. See you in an hour.”

“See you soon, Der-Bear!” Stiles teases, adding an earnest-bordering-on-wistful “Love you,” and hanging up before Derek can react to the declaration, and before he can feel badly about how infrequently he says it to Derek.

*****

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