Oh my god! That story with SI employees and the Rouge Avengers! I can't stop laughing! Please make that a fic someday! I literally laughed for a good five minutes! You are amazing!
Lmao they finally get sat down at the conference table and they’re juuuust about to begin speaking when Friday says, “Boss, there’s a problem.”
“OH MY GOD!” Steve shouts, nearing the end of his rope.
Tony sighs. “Yes, Friday, what is it?”
“You appear to be sitting with people that have caused you and yours physical harm in the past,” Friday began pleasantly. “It is in my code to protect you.”
“What,” Tony says and then, “Friday,” and then, “No–”
“I am releasing the Battle Bots,” Friday says pleasantly, and then there was a klaxon.
“Ladies and gentlemen,” Tony says, standing. “Fucking book it.”
Steve, Sam, Wanda, and Clint hesitate. Natasha is on her feet and out the door almost before he finishes speaking, dragging Scott behind her because just because he didn’t know Tony didn’t mean he should die.
A panel slides open in the wall and then there’s the sound of wheels on the tile.
“That… That’s Dum-E,” Steve says, confused. “Hey, buddy–”
Dum-E makes a horrible screech and bashes into him, smacking him in the head with his fire extinguisher.
“You fool,” Tony says. “Complete and utter.” He looks at Clint. “Dum-E is not the Battle Bots.”
Clint grabs Wanda’s wrist and flees as well.
“Jesus Christ,” Sam says, moving to help Steve up and get him out of the room.
Dum-E waves his fire extinguisher after them, then rolls aside so the bots coming up behind him can zoom out, lasers shining threateningly.
“Don’t hurt my employees,” Tony warns them.
They beep an affirmative before burning rubber to whiz out of the conference room.
Tony watches them go, then walks over to Dum-E and pats his chassis fondly. “Was that revenge enough for you?”
Dum-E waves his fire extinguisher and beeps happily.