sitcom gays

Le Duo: if Gaston and Lefou starred in their own sitcom 

Honestly tho this would be like one of those sitcoms that are really funny in the beginning then get kinda emotional as the series goes on… it would start with Gaston, with the help of his friend and wingman, Lefou, trying to get Belle to say yes to a date with him and miserably/hilariously failing every time. But the thing is, it would get really feelsy soon because Lefou would start to realize he has feelings for his friend, and Gaston will soon realize the same, and there’ll be a finale that makes us all cry buckets and ahhh suddenly I don’t want this show anymore

2

1940s beach babes

✩ *: ・゚ - BO BURNHAM SENTENCE STARTERS.

quotes from just some of my favorite songs by bo burnham. feel free to change the pronouns / names / punctuation whatever ! 

  • “ what’s funny ? ”
  • “ my ex girlfriend had a really weird fetish. she liked to dress up as herself & act like a fucking bitch all the time. ” 
  • “ if you can’t beat them , join ‘em. ”
  • “ i make all the single ladies ‘ oh (name) ! ’ ”
  • “ i swear i’m straight. ” 
  • “ just do a chinese accent. ” 
  • “  fuck my life, I don’t fuck my wife so fuck my wife & fuck my life. ” 
  • “ my daughter’s a whore like another girl who used to be her mother. ” 
  • “ my son is gay, but not sitcom gay. ”  
  • “ & i masturbate because i’m the only one whose standards are low enough to fuck me! ”
  • “ we had a helluva ride.” 
  • “ well, i motherfucking lied. ” 
  • “ just shut up ! ” 
  • “ fuck the system. ” 
  • “ it’s not jesus. it’s cheez - its, right ? ” 
  • “ you think i’m joking ? ” 
  • “ art is dead. ” 
  • “ tonight at ten the world is ending again. ” 
  • “ only on the channel 5. ” 
  • “ i’m a faggot. ” 
  • “ no girls wanna fuck me, trust me. ” 
  • “ i don’t give a fuck, don’t adjust me. ” 
  • “ one, two, three, whore - i mean four - shit, three, four, five, bitch - i mean six - shit. ” 
  • “ well, congratu-fucking-lations. ” 
  • “ i got your back kid. ”
  • “ fuck the rules, fuck the game, fuck you tools, fuck you’re lame. ” 
  • “ yeah, fuck me for my hard works, fuck another r - word, fuck me for my hard work that got me into harvard. ” 
  • “ you’ve got sticks and stones to turn to but I’ve got words to hurt you, so save your bullets ‘cause you’re fucked. ” 
  • “ you think you’re clever ? you’re fucked ! ” 
  • “ i must be psychotic, I must be demented to think that I’m worthy of all this attention. ”
  • “ i’m wearing makeup. ”
  • “ ‘cause i wanted my name in lights when i could have fed a family of four for forty fucking fortnights. ” 
  • “ but i’m just a kid. ” 
  • “ maybe i’ll grow out of it. ” 
  • “ i’m a gay sea - otter. ” 
  • “ i hate catchy choruses. ” 
  • “ i’m a hypocrit. ”
  • “ take off your bra & burn it. ”
  • “ eat a dick ! ”
  • “ oh my god, honestly are you fucking five ? ”
  • “ i think i’ve made the right decision. ”
  • “ it’s over. we’re unhappy. ”
  • “ & once the dust has settled i hope we can still be friends. ”
  • “ eat a fucking dick, like this ! ”
  • “ put on your dick - eating bib ! get ready to gobble a dick up ! ”
  • “ i didn’t think you’d cry for me… i didn’t know you cared. ” 
  • “ lick my clit ! ”
  • “ sorry you’re not what i need hun, lick this clit then leave son ! ”
  • “ i deserve better than you ! ”
  • “ you got a job to do, you better do it right. ”
  • “ i like oreoes & pussy ! yeah, in that order ! ”
  • “ i’m looking for somebody to love… or put my penis in – ” 
  • “ holy fuck i think she might be the one ! ”
  • “ i just want her to — how do I say this — sit on my face ! sit ! sit on my face ! ” 
  • “ you think you’re the right one every time ! ” 
  • “ according to my calculations, uh, you’re a pussy. ” 
  • “ i saw a homeless man named rich. isn’t that just terrible ? ” 
  • “ he didn’t here me say ‘ look out for the train ! ’ …because i didn’t say anything. ” 
  • “ i went to a store looking for something to buy but they only sold paintings of the same sad guy … no, wait — this store sells mirrors – ”

omg i just remembered the other night at karaoke my friend’s friend was talking about how he was going through a rough patch with his boyfriend and he said “men suck” and i said “OH HONEY you don’t have to tell me”
and honestly it was the greatest sitcom role reversal moment of all time.

Miranda Hart appreciation post.

I seriously don’t know why Miranda’s sitcom wasn’t more popular on tumblr! I mean it has:

Ships

Gay marriage

Body confidence (but also lack of)

Failing at new year’s resolutions

Failing at job interviews and generally being an adult

Social awkwardness

And the occasional existential crisis

Not to mention feminism and bad jokes! Seriously, if any of this applies to you, you should check it out!

it’s very funny! i’m out and everyone knows. how funny that it gets scooped up and erased. isn’t it cute. the girl does everything she can so others know, and it never gets noticed. it’s a really good joke that they still see me as straight.

what a sitcom i would make. gay girl mentions she thinks another girl is pretty. mother says to her, “objectively, yes.” laugh track.

bi girl hangs flag on her wall. “what lovely colors,” says her father, “homey.” the girl looks into the camera. laugh track.

“are you pregnant?” the mother worries over her ace children. it’s funny! we are all laughing.

we are all laughing. at the back of my throat are secrets that other people wish i had kept. my grandmother doesn’t know that i’m like this and i can’t tell her. my mother assures her that i’m on the market for a nice husband. 

it’s a great show! i’m never lonely or hurt. nobody ever asks me questions that burn away in my soul: are you sure? how do you know? are you really bi? how much do you love your boyfriend if you also like girls? will it go away? how do you have sex? how does it feel to be different? why would you teach that to children?

best friend grabs gay girl and kisses her so boys will notice the both of them. bi girl is asked for a threesome. beer bottles meet bi girl’s forehead at pride parades for being a breeder. gay girl can’t bring her girlfriend home for fear her mother won’t take it seriously.

it’s all okay. we’ve marriage legal! none of the states are protesting that, and corrective therapy is great in general. in the show, gay girl goes home and has to be straight. bi girl goes home and has to be straight. it’s very funny. the fact their parents would rather ignore the blatant truth is hilarious. that they purposefully see past the signs because they’d rather not “deal” with it. it’s wonderful and living like this never feels like you’re lying.

it’s very funny and we’re all laughing til we’re crying.

anonymous asked:

I HOPE THIRTEEN FLIRTS WITH CLARA AND EVERYTHING IS GAY AND BILL COMES BACK AND DOCTOR WHO JUST BECOMES A GAY SITCOM IN SPACE

I MEAN I WANT BILL AND HEATHER TO STAY TOGETHER, AND CLARA AND ASHILDR ARE OBVIOUSLY TOGETHER, SO I SAY GIVE HER A NEW COMPANION TO BE HER NEW GIRLFRIEND AND THEN WE’LL HAVE THREE WLW RELATIONSHIPS TO CRY OVER IN THIS BIG GAY WONDERFUL LOVE FEST