sir hector

hector barbossa reminders

Friendly reminder that Hector Barbossa nearly drowned himself and nearly got sucked down with his sinking ship trying to find and save Polly, the pet monkey he had before Jack the Monkey. Friendly reminder she wore dresses.

Friendly reminder that Pintel and Ragetti were the ones to pull him into their boat while the rogue pirates were slaughtering their friends and shipmates.

Friendly reminder that Hector Barbossa took turns with Pintel and Ragetti rowing through the night so that the two could get some sleep.

Friendly reminder that Jack once called Hector “sir” because Hector was a captain and Jack was just crew. Friendly reminder it went from “sir” to “Hector” with a swiftness.

Friendly reminder that the man who sunk his ship was actually one of his friends, and he has a lot of trust issues because of that.

Friendly reminder that Hector Barbossa does not like vodka.

Friendly reminder that Hector Barbossa gave his Piece of Eight to Ragetti for safekeeping, and it’s Ragetti that carved it into a wooden eye.

Friendly reminder that Hector Barbossa did not covet the Pearl for the Pearl’s sake. Friendly reminder he saw it as what Jack owed him.

Friendly reminder that Jack made fun of him for being Pirate Lord of the Caspian Sea. Friendly reminder this was before the mutiny.

Friendly reminder that in the first script of Curse of the Black Pearl Hector Barbossa gave a shit about his crew and saved one from falling in a chasm. Friendly reminder that this sentiment didn’t really change, only the actions.

Friendly reminder that Amanda loves this moron and likes to hurt herself remembering things like this. Friendly reminder that she’ll hurt you with them, too.

reasons why you should read “the girl of fire and thorns” by rae carson as soon as humanly possible:

  • yo what up most feminist book series in ya literature since the dawn of tamora pierce holy shit
  • features a poc cast that closely lines up with latin@s but it’s a fantasy world so not exactly
  • almost every single person is poc, the ones who are not are the bad guys this is super important
  • main character is very overweight in the beginning of the story and it’s the most realistic depiction of body image issues i’ve ever read
  • fantasy series you guys
  • eventually the main character loses weight BUT it’s earned and she doesn’t become automatically skinny, she’s still large but is super proud of her efforts in gaining muscle
  • i seriously want to emphasize this because she’s still “overweight” compared to other body types but she is healthy and that distinction matters so damn much
  • this main character’s name is elisa btw
  • she’s a “chosen one” but it’s not a surprise to her, she was raised with that knowledge and on some level it fucks her up
  • she’s got nerves of steel
  • character development what the hell so much character development
  • so she’s a princess, and gets married off in the first chapter on her motherfucken 16th birthday to secure an alliance
  • except was that the reason tho
  • CONSPIRACIES ABOUND
  • there’s a religious element but it’s much closer to fantasy than like christian lit not that there’s anything wrong with that but if religion in your young adult reading makes you uncomfortable don’t even sweat it
  • also the religious stuff is closely linked with QUESTION AUTHORITY/history was written by the winners
  • court intrigue, war, espionage, magic, destiny v. choice, romance
  • hold up lemme tell you about this romance thing
  • the “love triangle” gets resolved by the end of book 1 and i won’t spoil you but dude, seriously, rae carson is takes some risks here
  • romance is also secondary to the characters
  • elisa always puts her job/duty/responsibility first and thinks with her head because she’s busy BUT she also takes control of her sexuality it is perfect she is perfect
  • btw did i mention she’s extra smart? tactician and politician and when she’s wrong she admits her mistakes
  • lots of ladies
  • nuanced, varied cast of ladies operating in shades of grey, all strong in their own ways and not afraid to show it
  • holy shit the ladies and their badass selves
  • queens everywhere! you get a queen, you get a queen, look under your seats, everybody gets a queen
  • guys as soon as you read this series we are talking about elisa and cosme and mara and alodia and did i leave some ladies out yes i did because there are lots of ladies and i love all of them
  • also hector, we are going to talk about hector
  • it is sacrilege to read this book and not talk about sir hector, captain of the king’s guard okay

i will stand a top a mountain and sing praises of this series until i die it is fantastic. if you follow me you will know to trust me on this, do yourself a favor and change your life for the better

captainoflifeandlemons  asked:

What's your take on the training theory?

NB: For those who don’t know, the “Training ” was a popular conspiracy theory back in the days when “A Series of Unfortunate Events” was still being published. It entailed that the entirety of the series’ events were actually a secret test of character: the Baudelaire orphans were being challenged by their parents, who had staged their deaths and wanted to see if their children had what it took to enter VFD as permanent members. Olaf was ultimately revealed to be the examinator, and the secondary characters teachers helping the children to acquire the necessary skills along the way.

Naturally, not the entirety of the theory works within the canon: Olaf is not trying to teach anything and the Baudelaire fire was not staged. But it does hold weight to an extent because it helps explaining the way VFD acts throughout the series. More on that under the cut:

Keep reading

Fashionably Dramatic

This is a drabble from a fic I DO want to write. Eventually. When I have time. And am not behind on 4 other fics… 

( @hchano I know I owe you pt. 2 of worst, hopefully this will distract you in the meantime) 



“Darling you really need to calm down, everything is going to be fine.”

“Hector, where are the accessories for second formal wear ensemble? I thought I told you to take care of that 20 minutes ago.” Gabriel spat to his cowering assistant, ignoring his wife’s amused admonishments.

“I don’t know sir.” Hector replied, a tremor in his voice. “I told Rachelle to make sure that they were set, I’m not sure what could have delayed…”

“Well then why don’t you go and find out instead of stuttering here like a deranged chicken?”

“Gabriel!” His wife cried, smacking him lightly in the back of the head. “Honestly Hector don’t listen to him he has the emotional sensitivity of a ravenous bear when he is stressed. Beside I see Rachelle bringing them over now so clearly everything is fine. Why don’t you go over and make sure that she knows how to arrange the pieces?”

Hector nodded gratefully and rushed away, eager for the excuse to be as far away from his bosses rage as possible.

“Absolute incompetence. How difficult can it be to hire a staff that can follow basic instructions?” Gabriel sighed, eyebrows knitting in frustration as he surveyed the frantic whirlwind of clothing and makeup, as stylists and interns desperately worked to finish the last minute preparations for the launching of the new fall line.

His wife chuckled beside him, leaning up on her tiptoes to plant a light kiss on his cheek while she balanced an awestruck Adrien on her hip.

“This is the price you pay for building up an internationally successful corporation darling.”

“No this is the price I pay for accepting mediocrity from my employees. I ought to have fired that man weeks ago. A gorilla would make a better assistant.”

“Well, Adrien thinks every looks wonderful, don’t you dear?” She cooed lifting the grinning toddler who immediately reached out to his father.

In spite of himself Gabriel’s expression soften as he took hold of his squirming son who was looking wildly around at the chaos.

“He’s 2, he thinks everything looks wonderful.” Gabriel retorted raising an eyebrow at his wife. He turned back to his son with a playfully stern expression. “Don’t worry Adrien, you are too smart to be fooled for long. Soon you too will know better than to settle for second rate subordinates. Isn’t that right?” He leaned forward and poked his nose against Adrien’s cheek. The boy erupted into happy giggles.

“See? He completely agrees with me.”

A loud crash sounded from behind them causing Adrien to latch his arms around his father’s neck in surprise. Gabriel rolled his eyes and patted his son comfortingly on the back.

“I might as well just set this whole building on fire. At this point it couldn’t make this humiliation any worse.”

“Honestly dear you are one tragic accident away from becoming a supervillain.”


3

On 25 March 1903, Major General Sir Hector Archibald MacDonald, KCB, DSO, also known as “Fighting Mac” died tragically by his own hand.

The son of a crofter, he was born at a farm at Rootfield, near Dingwall on 4 March 1853. Like most in his area, he was a Gaelic speaker and in later life went by the name Eachann nan Cath (‘Hector of the Battles’).

He enlisted in the Gordon Highlanders as a private at 17, and finished his career as a major general; one of only a few men to ever have achieved this feat.

His bravery in the presence of the enemy during the Second Afghan War led to him being offered either a Victoria Cross or a commission. He chose a commission.

At the Battle of Omdurman (2 September 1898) Kitchener unwittingly exposed the flanks of his army to the Dervish. MacDonald swung his men in an arc as the Dervishes charged and held the ground until Kitchener could redeploy. After Omdurman, MacDonald became a household name in Britain. Many people believed that MacDonald, and not Kitchener, was the true hero of Obdurman.

After military service in South Africa and India, he was appointed Commander-in-Chief of British troops in Ceylon. Here he was to become embroiled in rumours, possibly malicious, of homosexuality which led to him seeing no way out but to shoot himself.

A government report released on 29 June 1903 concluded that, “we find the late Sir Hector MacDonald has been cruelly assassinated by vile and slandering tongues. While honourably acquitting the late Sir Hector MacDonald of any charge whatsoever, we cannot but deplore the sad circumstances of the case that have fallen so disastrously on one whom we have found innocent of any crime attributed to him.”

He is buried in Dean Cemetery, Edinburgh, where there is an impressive gravestone (pictured). There is also a 100 ft high memorial, erected above Dingwall in 1907, and one on Mulbuie on the Black Isle, near where MacDonald was born.

The Affairs at Meddler’s Top: A Play in Two Acts

@blacksuitsdiamondmobster


ACT 2: Scene 1

*The audience settles back into their seats and the lights dim in the auditorium, starting back up over the court*

Usher: *Standing at attention to address the audience* Court will rise.

Judge: *Enters once more and settles behind his bench*

Usher: Court is in session *He moves back into his position near the bench, this allows time for the audience to resume sitting*

Judge: Right Mr. Farquar, where were we?

Pros: In the Drawing Room. The Maid had just been shot

Judge: Oh yes, I remember. Well what happened then?

Pros; Well m’lud, we return to the drawing room an hour later. The body has been removed, and Inspector Topiary and Sergeant Manners are just beginning their investigation



ACT 2: Scene 2

*The lights dim on the courtroom and start coming up on the main stage, the sheer curtain pulls back once more to open upon the Drawing room, and hour after the murder occurred, with Sir Hector speaking with the Inspector, the Sergeant, Davinia, and Petunia. Topiary asks if Sir Hector knows of any reason the maid may have been shot. Sir Hector mentions that she was not a very good maid but that’s hardly a reason to shoot anyone, he gets chastised by Lady Davinia, not only for his poor taste in statements bot for his foolhardy scheme. The inspector agrees with her that it was a ridiculous plot. Hector admits that, but in hindsight he needn’t have worried the necklace was a fake. The inspector asks how he knows this, Petunia pipes up about the Baroness inspecting it and announcing they were not real emeralds. Topiary aska where the guests were when the maid was shot, Davinia tells him honestly that they were all on their way to their rooms to wait for the inspector. The sergeant asks who found the body. Hector tells him how Glossop the butler was there when the poor girl was shot. The inspector decides to start with the butler and asks the Sergeant to see everyone present to their rooms until he needs them.

The Sergeant escorts the ladies while the Inspector asks Sir Hector to send Glossop in to him. While the butler arrives Inspector Topiary takes out his magnifying glass and scrutinizes the area where the maid fell as well as the doors and the large French Windows. Glossop enters and the Inspector begins by asking him how long he’s worked for the Croquet’s, and we’re given the same drawn out 2 minute answer that Twitter was given back in act one. The Inspector had to interrupt him to spare us a second time, he asks if Glossop enjoys the position, he answers in the affirmative, Topiary continues about the health of the relationship of the Croquet’s, Glossop answers vaguely. The Inspector continues on with what had occurred in that room that evening. Glossop explains how they learned the necklace was fake and how Sir Hector called for the Inspector. The guests were asked to wait for the Inspector in their rooms, Sir Hector asked himself, Glossop, and Blossom the maid to tidy up the drawing room for interrogations. Then there was a sudden shot and Blossom fell dead. He had no answer for the Inspector as to why someone would shoot the poor girl. The Inspector takes note and asks Glossop to ask Mr. Éclair to come down. Glossop exits and in his absence Topiary asks Sergeant Manners to conduct the interview so that he can watch the reactions*

Bouffant: *He enters almost hesitantly and stays near the door* Inspector? Sergeant? You wanted to see me? [pg 19]

Sergeant: Yes sir, we did. Would you like to sit down?

Bouffant: Thank you?

Sergeant: Now Mr. Éclair, perhaps you would like to recount the events of this afternoon?

Bouffant: It’s all very simple. I arrived just before lunch, following an invitation from Sir Hector to spend the weekend, playing tennis. On my arrival I was met, shown the gardens, then appeared in here for pre-lunch drinks. Then Sir Hector for some reason or another produced his wife’s emerald necklace. The Baroness screamed “Fake! Fake!” We were ushered to our rooms, and the maid was shot

Sergeant: Very clear, Mr. Éclair

Bouffant: Well if you can make sense of it, you’re welcome to it

Inspector: So where were you when the maid was shot?

Bouffant: …Er…I was in the library with Lady Davinia

Inspector: Not in your room?

Bouffant: On my way there Inspector. I needed something to read. As you know I work in the theatre. I am always on the lookout for new ideas

Sergeant: Was there anybody else in the library?

Bouffant: No we were quite alone

Inspector: Thank you Mr. Éclair. That will be all for now

Bouffant: Can I go?

Inspector: You mustn’t leave the house I’m afraid

Bouffant: Oh how exasperating. It will be very bad for my play if it gets out that I’ve been involved with murder and robbery

Inspector: Well just remember that Blossom is dead. She can never leave. Perhaps you’d ask Mr. Fortesque to come in please *He almost pouts but exits to go and fetch Twitter*

Sergeant: I don’t think much of him Inspector

Inspector: Neither do I

Twitter: Inspector you wanted to see me?

Inspector: Yes indeed I did. Now I know why you were down here this weekend, and what happened this afternoon, but perhaps you could confirm for me where you were when the maid was shot.

Twitter: Oh that’s easy. I was in the library with Baroness Gorianova

Sergeant: Really? Was anybody else there?

Twitter: No just myself and the Baroness. I was looking at the map of Africa. I’m planning a new expedition to seek out the lost tribe of the Umbongo. I specialize in lost tribes you know

Sergeant: Really sir. What do you do when you’ve found them?

Twitter: Well not much actually. But I love travel and it lets you get to know a country well. I love Africa

Inspector: Quite sir. That’ll be all. Please send in Mr. Barrington-Smythe

Twitter: OF course, Inspector *He makes a speedy exit out*

Sergeant: Another one in the library alone eh? Curiouser and curiouser.

Inspector: Tell me Sergeant. If Mr. Fortesque spends so much time in Africa how is it that he has such a pale complexion?

Sergeant: Indeed sir.

Peregrine: *Enters, looking a bit tense* Inspector, please be quick, I would like to return to London this evening, I have urgent business to attend to. I’m due to play in a tennis tournament tomorrow

Inspector: You’re in rather a rush aren’t you sir? After all this is a murder investigation, and you were due to stay here the weekend

Peregrine: Well I’m afraid I’ve got my dates mixed up

Inspector: I’m sorry Mr. Barrington-Smythe but you will have to remain here until our investigations are completed

Peregrine: Look it’s obvious that I couldn’t have killed the maid. I was in the library with Petunia when the fatal shot was fired

Sergeant: Really sir, I thought you might be. Were you alone by any chance?

Peregrine: Yes we were. Now if you’ll excuse me I must pack

Inspector: I’m sorry sir, you can’t leave, not just yet. What line of business are you in sir?

Peregrine: This and that you know, I dabble

Inspector: Right, thank you sir, please wait in your room

Peregrine: Oh really *He’s a bit cold and he walks briskly out*

Inspector: Right Sergeant. This is what I want you to do. Go and interview the ladies, Baroness Svetlana, Trellis Trelawney, and Lettis Croquet. Find out where they were this afternoon. I’m going to make my own investigations about the three gentlemen we’ve just interviewed. I’m sure they have something to hide

Sergeant: Very well sir *He pulls out his own notepad and heads off to stage right, the lights dimming slowly after him*